TEN  THOUSAND  A-YEAR. 


BT 

SAMUEL   WARREN,   B.  C.  L. 


Fortuna,  ssevo  laete  negotio,  et 
Ludum  insolentem  ludere  pertinax, 
Trausmutiit  iucertos  hoiiores, 

Nuuc  mihi,  uunc  alii  beuigna. 
Laudo  nianentein.     Si  celeres  quatit 
Pennas,  resigno  quae  dedit,  et  mea 
Virtute  me  involve,  probamque 

Pauperieui  sine  dote  qusero. — HORACI, 

Fortune,  that  with  malicious  joy 

Does  man,  her  slave  oppress, 
Proud  of  her  office  to  destroy, 

Is  seldom  pleased  to  bless ; 
Still  various,  and  nnconstant  still, 
But  with  an  inclination  to  be  ill. 
Promotes,  degrades,  delights  in  strife, 
And  makes  a  lottery  of  life. 
I  can  enjoy  her  while  she's  kind  ; 
— But  when  she  dances  in  the  wind, 
And  shakes  the  wings,  and  will  not  stay, 
I  puff  the  prostitute  away  : 

The  little  or  the  much  she  gave,  is  quietly  resigned ; 
Content  with  poverty  my  soul  I  arin, 
And  virtue,  though  in  rags,  will  keep  me  warm. 

HORACE — BY  DUVDEN. 


PART  ONE 


NEW  YORK 

AMERICAN   PUBLISHERS   CORPORATION 
310-318  SIXTH  AVENUE 


Stack 
Annex 


84-1  b 
V 


to 
EMILY, 

A  LITTLE  BLUE-EYED   LAUGHING   IMAGE  OF  PUBITY  AND  HAPPINESS. 

THIS  VOLUME  IS  INSCRIBED, 

AS  A  SLIGHT  MEMORIAL  OF  A  FATHER'S  AFFECTION  FOB 
AN  ONLY  DAUGHTER 

October,  1841 


PREFACE. 


THE  Author  of  this  Work  begs  gratefully  to  express  his  con- 
viction that  no  small  share  of  any  success  which  it  may  have 
met  with,  is  attributable  to  the  circumstance  of  its  having  had 
the  advantage  of  an  introduction  to  the  public  through  the 
medium  of  JSlackwoocFs  Magazine — a  distinguished  periodical, 
to  which  he  feels  it  an  honor  to  have  been,  for  a  time,  a  con- 
tributor. 

One  word,  only,  he  ventm-es  to  offer  with  reference  to  the 
general  character  and  tendency  of  "  TEX  THOUSAND  A- YEAR." 
He  has  occasionally  observed  it  spoken  of  as  merely  a 
"  comic,"  "  an  amusing  and  laughable"  story  ;  but  he  cannot 
help  thinking  that  no  one  will  so  characterize  it,  who  may  take 
the  trouble  of  reading  it  throughout,  and  be  capable  of  com- 
prehending its  scope  and  object.  Whatever  may  be  its  de- 
fects of  execution,  it  has  been  written  in  a  grave  and  earnest 
spirit ;  with  no  attempt  whatever  to  render  it  acceptable  to 
mere  novel-readers  ;  but  with  a  steadfast  view  to  that  develop- 
ment and  illustration,  whether  humorously  or  otherwise,  of 
principles,  of  character,  and  of  conduct,  which  the  author  had 
proposed  to  himself  from  the  first,  in  the  hope  that  he  might 
secure  the  approbation  of  persons  of  sober,  independent,  and 
experienced  judgment. 

Literature  is  not  the  author's  profession.  Having  been  led, 
by  special  circumstances  only,  to  commence  writing  this  work, 
he  found  it  impossible  to  go  on,  without  sacrificing  to  it  a 
large  portion  of  the  time  usually  allotted  to  repose,  at 
some  little  cost  both  of  health  and  spirits.  This  was,  how- 
ever, indispensable,  in  order  to  prevent  its  interference  with 
his  professional  avocations.  It  has  been  written,  also,  under 
certain  other  considerable  disadvantages  — which  may  account 
for  several  imperfections  in  it  during  its  original  appearance. 
The  periodical  interval  of  leisure  which  his  profession  allows 
him,  has  enabled  the  auther,  however,  to  give  that  complete 


6  PREFACE. 

revision  to  the  whole,  which  may  render  it  worthier  of  the 
public  favor.  He  is  greatly  gratified  by  the  reception  which 
it  has  already  met  with,  both  at  home  and  abroad  ;  and  in 
taking  a  final  and  a  reluctant  leave  of  the  public,  ventures  to 
express  a  hope,  that  this  work  may  prove  to  be  an  addition, 
however  small  and  humble,  to  the  stock  of  healthy  English 
literature. 

London,  October.  1841. 


*#*  For  the   beautiful  verses  entitled  "  PEACE,"  (at  page 
128,)  the  author  is  indebted  to  a  friend. 

}rf<* 


TEN  THOUSAND  A-YEAR. 


CHAPTER  I. 

ABOUT  ten  o'clock  one  Sunday  morning,  in  the  month  of 
July  18 — ,  the  dazzling  sunbeams  which  had  for  several  hours 
irradiated  a  little  dismal  back  attic  in  one  of  the  closest  courts 
adjoining  Oxford  Street,  in  London,  and  stimulated  with 
their  intensity  the  closed  eyelids  of  a  young  man  lying  in  bed, 
at  length  awoke  him.  He  rubbed  his  eyes  for  some  time,  to 
relieve  himself  from  the  irritation  occasioned  by  the  sudden 
glare  they  encountered ;  and  yawned  and  stretched  his  limbs 
with  a  heavy  sense  of  weariness,  as  though  his  sleep  had  not 
refreshed  him.  He  presently  cast  his  eyes  on  the  heap  of 
clothes  lying  huddled  together  on  the  backless  chair  by  the 
bedside,  and  where  he  had  hastily  flung  them  about  an  hour 
after  midnight ;  at  which  time  he  had  returned  from  a  great 
draper's  shop  in  Oxford  Street,  where  he  served  as  a  shop- 
man, and  where  he  had  nearly  dropped  asleep  after  a  long 
day's  work,  in  the  act  of  putting  up  the  shutters.  He  could 
hardly  keep  his  eyes  open  while  he  undressed,  short  as  was 
the  time  required  to  do  so ;  and  on  dropping  exhausted  into 
bed,  there  he  had  continued  in  deep  unbroken  slumber,  till 
the  moment  at  which  he  is  presented  to  the  reader.  He  lay 
for  several  minutes,  stretching,  yawning,  and  sighing,  occa- 
sionally casting  an  irresolute  glance  towards  the  tiny  fire- 
Elace,  where  lay  a  modicum  of  wood  and  coal,  with  a  tinder- 
ox  and  a  match  or  two  placed  upon  the  hob,  so  that  he  could 
easily  light  his  fire  for  the  purposes  of  shaving  and  breakfast- 
ing. He  stepped  at  length  lazily  out  of  bed,  and  when  he  felt 
his  feet,  again  yawned  and  stretched  himself.  Then  he  lit 
his  fire,  placed  his  bit  of  a  kettle  on  the  top  of  it,  and  returned 
to  bed  where  he  lay  with  his  eye  fixed  on  the  fire,  watching 
the  crackling  blaze  insinuate  itself  through  the  wood  and 
coal.  Once,  however,  it  began  to  fail,  so  he  had  to  get  up  and 
assist  it,  by  blowing,  and  bits  of  paper  ;  and  it  seemed  in  so 
precarious  a  state  that  he  determined  not  again  to  lie  down, 


10  TEN  THOUSAND  A-TEAB. 

but  sit  on  the  bedside :  as  he  did,  with  his  arms  folded,  ready  to 
resume  operations  if  necessary.  In  this  posture  he  remained 
for  some  time,  watching  his  little  fire,  and  listlessly  listening 
to  the  discordant  jangling  of  innumerable  church-bells,  clam- 
orously calling  the  citizens  to  their  devotions.  The  current 
of  thoughts  passing  through  his  mind,  was  something  like  the 
following  :— 

"  Heigho !— Lud,  Lud !— Dull  as  ditch  water !— This  is  my 
only  holiday,  yet  I  don't  seem  to  enjoy  it !— for  I  feel  knocked 
up  with  my  week's  work !  (A  yawn.)  What  a  life  mine  is, 
to  be  sure !  Here  am  I,  in  my  eighkand-twentieth  year,  and 
for  four  long  years  have  been  one  of  the  shopmen  at  Tag-rag 
<fc  Co.'s,  slaving  from  half-past  seven  o'clock  in  the  morning 
till  nine  at  night,  and  all  for  a  salary  of  £35  a-year,  and  my 
board !  And  Mr.  Tag-rag — eugh !  what  a  beast !— is  always 
telling  me  how  high  he's  raised  my  salary !  Thirty-five 
pounds  a-year  is  all  I  have  for  lodging,  and  appearing  like  a 
gentleman!  'Pon  my  soul!  it  can't  last;  for  sometimes  I 
feel  getting  desperate — such  strange  thoughts  come  into  my 
mind ! — Seven  snillings  a-week  do  I  pay  for  this  cursed  hole 
— (he  uttered  these  words  with  a  bitter  emphasis,  accom- 
panied by  a  disgustful  look  round  the  little  room)— that  one 
couldn't  swing  a  cat  in  without  touching  the  four  sides  ! — 
Last  winter,  three  of  our  gents  (i.  e.  his  fellow-shopmen) 
came  to  tea  with  me  one  Sunday  night ;  and  bitter  cold  as  it 
was,  we  four  made  this  cussed  dog-hole  so  hot,  we  were 
obliged  to  open  the  window ! — And  as  for  accommodation — I 
recollect  I  had  to  borrow  two  nasty  chairs  from  the  people 


the  very  vanity  of 
— as  it's  said  somewhere  in  the  Bible — and  no  mistake! 
Fag,  fag,  fag,  all  one's  days,  and— what  for  ?  Thirty-five 
pounds  a-year,  and  lno  advance/'  (Here  occurred  a  pause.) 
Bah,  bells !  ring  away  till  you're  all  cracked ! — Now  do  you 
think  fm  going  to  be  mewed  up  in  church  on  this  the  only 
day  out  of  the  seven  I've  got  to  sweeten  myself  in,  and  sniff 
fresh  air  ?  A  precious  joke  that  would  be !  (A  yawn.) 
•Whew!— after  all,  I'd  almost  as  lief  sit  here;  for  what's  the 
use  of  my  going  out  ?  Every  body  I  see  out  is  happy,  excepting 
me,  and  the  poor  chaps  that  are  like  me !— Everybody  laughs 
when  they  see  me,  and  know  that  I'm  only  a  tallow-faced 
counter-jumper— I  know  that's  the  odious  name  we  gents  go 
by !— for  whom  it's  no  use  to  go  out !  Oh,  Lord !  what's  the 
use  of  being  good-looking,  as  some  chaps  say  I  am  ?  "—Here 
he  instinctively  passed  his  left  hand  through  a  profusion  of 
sandy-colored  hair,  and  cast  an  eye  towards  the  bit  of  fract- 
ured looking-glass  that  hung  against  the  wall,  and  which, 
by  faithfully  representing  to  him  a  by  no  means  ugly  set  of 
features  (despite  the  dismal  hue  of  his  hair)  whenever  he 
chose  to  appeal  to  it,  had  afforded  him  more  enjoyment  than 


TEN  THOUSAND  A-TEAE.  11 

any  other  object  in  the  world  for  years.  "Ah,  by  Jove! 
many  and  many's  the  fine  gal  I've  done  my  best  to  attract 
the  notice  of,  while  I  was  serving  her  in  the  shop, — that  is, 
when  I've  seen  her  get  out  of  a  carriage !  There  has  been 
luck  to  many  a  chap  like  me,  in  the  same  line  of  speculation  : 
look  at  Tom  Tarnish— how  did  he  get  Miss  Twang,  the  rich 
piano-forte  maker's  daughter ! — and  now  he's  cut  the  shop, 
and  lives  at  Hackney,  like  a  regular  gentleman !  Ah !  that 
was  a  stroke !  But  somehow  it  hasn't  answered  with  me  yet : 
the  gals  don't  take !  How  I  have  set  my  eyes,  to  be  sure,  and 
ogled  them — all  of  them  don't  seem  to  dislike  the  thing — and 
sometimes  they'll  smile,  in  a  sort  of  way  that  says  I'm  safe — 
but  it's  been  no  use  yet,  not  a  bit  of  it !— My  eyes  !  catch  me, 
by  the  way,  ever  nodding  again  to  a  lady  on  the  Sunday,  that 
had  smiled  when  I  stared  at  her  while  serving  her  rn  the 
shop — after  what  happened  to  me  a  month  or  two  ago  in  the 
Park !  Didn't  I  feel  like  d  amaged  goods,  j  ust  then !  But  it's 
no  matter,  women  are  so  different  at  different  times ! — Very 
likely  I  mis-managed  the  thing.  By  the  way,  what  a  pre- 
cious puppy  of  a  chap  the  fellow  was  that  came  up  to  her  at 
the  time  she  stepped  out  of  her  carriage  to  walk  a  bit !  As 
for  good  looks— cut  me  to  ribbons  (another  glance  at  the 
glass)  no;  I  a'n't  afraid  there,  neither— but— heigho !— I  sup- 
pose he  was,  as  they  say,  born  with  a  golden  spoon  in  his 
mouth,  and  had  never  so  many  a  thousand  a  year,  to  make 
up  to  him  for  never  so  few  brains !  He  was  uncommon  well- 
dressed,  though,  I  must  own.  What  trousers  ! — they  stuck 
so  natural  to  him,  he  might  have  been  born  in  them.  And 
his  waistcoat,  and  satin-  stock — what  an  air !  And  yet,  his 
figure  was  nothing  very  out  of  the  way !  His  gloves,  as 
white  as  snow  ;  I've  no  doubt  he  wears  a  pair  of  them  a-day 
— my  stars !  that's  three-and-sixpence  a-day ;  for  don't  I  know 
what  they  cost  ? — Whew !  if  I  had  but  the  cash  to  carry  on 
that  sort  of  thing !— And  when  he'd  seen  her  into  her  carriage 
— the  horse  he  got  on  ! — and  what  a  tiptop  groom — that  chap's 
wages,  I'll  answer  for  it,  were  equal  to  my  salary !  (Here 
was  another  pause.)  Now,  just  for  the  fun  of  the  thing,  only 
suppose  luck  was  to  befall  me  !  Say  that  somebody  was  to 
leave  me  lots  of  cash, — many  thousands  a-year,  or  something 
in  that  line !  My  stars !  wouldn't  I  go  it  with  the  best  of 
them !  (Another  long  pause.)  Gad,  I  really  should  hardly 
know  how  to  begin  to  spend  it !— I  think,  by  the  way,  I'd  buy 
a  title  to  set  off  with— for  what  won't  money  buy  ?  The 
thing's  often  done ;  there  was  a  great  biscuit-baker  in  the 
city,  the  other  day,  made  a  baronet  of,  all  for  his  money— and 
why  shouldn't  I  ?  "  He  gre\y  a  little  heated  with  the  prog- 
ress of  his  reflections,  clasping  his  hands  with  involuntary 
energy,  as  he  stretched  them  out  to  their  fullest  extent,  to 
give  effect  to  a  very  hearty  yawn.  "  Lord,  only  think  how  it 
would  sound ! — 


12  'TEN  THOUSAND  A-YEAR. 

*  SIR     TITTLEBAT    TITMOUSE,    BARONET  ;     OR,    LORD    TTTMOUS*'. 

"The  very  first  place  I'd  go  to,  after  I'd  got  my  title,  and 
was  rigged  out  in  Stulze's  tip-top,  should  bey-our  cursed 
shop,  to  buy  a  dozen  or  two  pair  of  white  kid.  What  a 
flutter  there  would  be  among  the  poor  pale  devils  as  were 
standing,  just  as  ever,  behind  the  counters,  at  Tag-rag  and 
Co.'s  when  my  carriage  drew  up,  and  I  stepped,  a  tip-top 
swell,  into  the  shop.  Tag-rag  would  come  and  attend  to  me 
himself.  No,  he  wouldnt— pride  wouldn't  let  him.  I  don't 
know,  though  :  what  wouldn't  he  do  to  turn  a  penny,  and 
make  two  and  ninepence  into  three  and  a  penny  ?  I  shouldn't 
quite  come  Captain  Stiff  over  him,  I  think;  but  I  should 
treat  him  with  a  kind  of  an  air,  too,  as  if— hem !  'Pon  my 
life !  how  delightful !  (A  sigh  and  a  pause.)  Yes,  I  should 
often  come  to  the  shop.  Gad,  it  would  be  half  the  fun  of  my 
fortune !  How  they  would  envy  me,  to  be  sure !  How  one 
should  enjoy  it !  I  wouldn't  think  of  marrying  till — and  yet 
I  won't  say  either;  if  I  got  among  some  of  them  out  and 
outers — those  first  rate  articles — that  lady,  for  instance,  the 
other  day  in  the  Park — I  should  like  to  see  her  cut  me  as  she 
did,  with  ten  thousand  a-year  in  my  pocket!  Why,  she'd  be 
running  after  me,  or  there's  no  truth  in  novels,  which  I'm 
sure  there  s  often  a  great  deal  in.  Oh,  of  course,  I  might 
marry  whom  I  pleased.  Who  couldn't  be  got  with  ten 
thousand  a-year?  (Another  pause.)  I  should  go  abroad  to 
Russia  directly ;  for  they  tell  me  there's  a  man  lives  there 
who  could  dye  this  cussed  hair  of  mine  any  color  I  liked — 
egad !  I'd  come  home  as  black  as  a  crow,  and  hold  up  my 
head  as  high  as  any  of  them !  While  I  was  about  it,  I'd 
have  a  touch  at  my  eyebrows." Crash  went  all  his  castle- 
building,  at  the  sound  of  his  tea-kettle,  hissing,  whizzing, 
sputtering  in  the  agonies  of  boiling  over ;  as  if  the  intolerable 
heat  of  the  fire  had  driven  desperate  the  po9r  creature  placed 
upon  it,  who  instinctively  tried  thus  to  extinguish  the  cause 
of  its  anguish.  Having  taken  it  off  and  placed  it  upon  the 
hob,  and  put  on  the  fire  a  tiny  fragment  of  fresh  coal,  he 
began  to  make  preparations  for  shaving,  by  pouring  some  of 
the  hot  water  into  an  old  tea-cup,  which  was  presently  to 
serve  for  the  purposes  of  breakfast.  Then  he  spread  out  a 
bit  of  crumpled  whity-brown  paper,  in  which  had  been  folded 
up  a  couple  of  cigars,  bought  overnight  for  the  Sunday's 
special  enjoyment— and  as  to  which,  if  he  supposed  they  had 
come  from  any  place  beyond  the  four  seas,  I  imagine  him  to 
have  been  slightly  mistaken.  He  placed  this  bit  of  paper  on 
the  little  mantelpiece ;  drew  his  solitary,  well-worn  razor 
several  times  across  the  palm  of  his  left  hand ;  dipped  his 
brush,  worn  within  a  third  of  an  inch  to  the  stump,  into  the 
hot  water ;  presently  passed  it  over  so  much  of  his  face  as 
he  intended  to  shave ;  then  rubbed  on  the  damp  surface  a 
bit  of  yellow  soap— and  in  less  than  five  minutes  Mr.  Tit- 


TEN  THOUSAND  A-YEAR.  13 

mouse  was  a  shaved  man.  But  mark — don't  suppose  that  he 
had  performed  an  extensive  operation.  One  would  have 
thought  him  anxious  to  get  rid  of  as  much  as  possible  of  his 
abominable  sandy-colored  hair — quite  the  contrary.  Every 
hair  of  his  spreading  whiskers  was  sacred  from  the  touch  of 
steel ;  and  a  bushy  crop  of  hair  stretched  underneath  his 
chin,  coming  curled  out  on  each  side  of  it,  above  his  stock, 
like  two  little  horns,  or  tusks.  An  imperial — i.  e.  a  dirt- 
colored  tuft  of  hair,  permitted  to  grown  perpendicularly 
down  the  under  lip  of  puppies — and  a  pair  of  promising 
mustaches,  poor  Mr.  Titmouse  had  been  compelled  to 
sacrifice  some  time  before,  to  the  tyrannical  whimsies  of  his 
vulgar  employer,  Mr.  Tag-rag,  who  imagined  them  not  to  be 
exactly  suitable  appendages  for  counter-jumpers.  So  that  it 
will  be  seen  that  the  space  shaved  over  on  this  occasion  was 
somewhat  circumscribed.  This  operation  over,  he  took  out 
of  his  trunk  an  old  dirty-looking  pomatum  pot.  A  little  of 
its  contents,  extracted  011  the  tips  of  his  two  fore  fingers,  he 
stroked  carefully  into  his  eye-brows ;  then  spreading  some 
on  the  palms  of  his  hands,  he  rubbed  it  vigorously  into  his 
stubborn  hair  and  whiskers  for  some  quarter  of  an  hour ;  and 
then  combed  and  brushed  his  hair  into  half-a-dozen  different 
dispositions — so  fastidious  in  that  matter  was  Mr.  Titmouse. 
Then  he  dipped  the  end  of  a  towel  into  a  little  water,  and 
t\yisting  it  round  his  right  fore-finger,  passed  it  gently  over 
his  face,  carefully  avoiding  his  eye-brows,  and  the  hair  at  the 
top,  sides,  and  bottom  of  his  face,  which  he  then  wiped  with 
a  dry  corner  of  the  towel ;  and  no  farther  did  Mr.  Tittlebat 
Titmouse  think  it  necessary  to  carry  his  ablutions.  Had  he 
been  able  to  "  see  himself  as  others  saw  him,"  in  respect  of 
those  neglected  regions  which  lay  somewhere  behind  and 
beneath  his  ears,  he  might  not  possibly  have  thought  it 
superfluous  to  irrigate  them  with  a  little  soap  and  water  ; 
but,  after  all,  he  knew  best ;  it  might  have  given  him  cold  : 
and  besides,  his  hair  was  very  thick  and  long  behind,  and 
might  perhaps  conceal  anything  that  was  unsightly.  Then 
Mr.  Titmouse  drew  from  underneath  the  bed  a  bottle  of 
Warren's  "  incomparable  blacking,"  and  a  couple  of  brushes, 
with  great  labor  and  skill  polishing  his  boots  up  to  a  wonder- 
ful point  of  brilliancy.  Having  replaced  his  blacking 
implements  under  the  bed  and  washed  his  hands,  he  devoted 
a  few  moments  to  boiling  about  three  tea-spoonfuls  of  coffee, 
(as  it  was  styled  on  the  paper  from  which  he  took,  and  in 
which  he  had  bought  it— whereas  it  was,  in  fact,  chicory.) 
Then  he  drew  forth  from  his  trunk  a  calico  shirt,  with  linen 
wristbands  and  collars,  which  had  been  worn  only  twice 
since  its  last  washing — i.  e.  on  the  preceding  two  Sundays — 
and  put  it  on,  taking  great  care  not  to  rumple  a  very  showy 
front,  containing  three  little  rows  of  frills ;  in  the  middle 
one  of  which  he  stuck  three  "  studs,"  connected  together 
with  two  little  gilt  chains,  looking  exceedingly  stylish— 


14  TEN  THOUSAND  A-YEAR. 

especially  coupled  with  a  span-new  satin  stock,  which  he 
next  buckled  round  his  neck.  Having  put  on  his  bright 
boots,  (without,  I  am  sorry  to  say,  any  stockings,)  he  carefully 
insinuated  his  legs  into  a  pair  of  white  trousers,  for  the  tirst 
time  since  their  last  washing;  and  what  with  his  short 
straps  and  high  braces,  they  were  so  tight  that  you  would 
have  feared  their  bursting  if  he  should  have  sat  down  hastily. 
I  am  almost  afraid  that  I  shall  hardly  be  believed ;  but  it  is 
a  fact,  that  the  next  thing  he  did  was  to  attach  a  pair  of 
spurs  to  his  boots :— but,  to  be  sure,  it  was  not  impossible 
that  he  might  intend  to  ride  during  the  day.  Then  he  put 
on  a  queer  kind  of  under- \vaistcoat,  which  in  fact  was  only  a 
roll-collar  of  rather  faded  pea-green  silk,  and  designed  to  set 
off  a  very  fine  flowered  damson-colored  silk  waistcoat ;  over 
which  he  drew  a  massive  mosaic-gold  chain,  (to  purchase 
which  he  had  sold  a  serviceable  silver  watch,)  which  had 
been  carefully  wrapped  up  in  cotton  wool ;  from  which  soft 
depository,  also,  he  drew  HIS  RING,  (those  must  have  been 
sharp  eyes  which  could  tell,  at  a  distance,  and  in  a  hurry, 
that  it  was  not  diamond,)  which  he  placed  on  the  stumpy 
little  finger  of  his  red  and  thick  right  hand— and  con- 
templated its  sparkle  with  exquisite  satisfaction.  Having 
proceeded  thus  tar  with  his  toilet,  he  sat  down  to  his  break- 
last,  spreading  the  shirt  he  had  taken  off  upon  his  lap,  to 
preserve  his  white  trousers  from  spot  or  stain— his  thoughts 
alternating  between  his  late  waking  vision  and  his  purposes 
for  the  day.  He  had  no  butter,  having  used  the  last  on  the 
preceding  morning ;  so  he  was  fain  to  put  up  with  dry  bread 
— and  very  dry  and  teeth-trying  it  was,  poor  fellow — but  his 
eye  lit  on  his  ring!  Having  swallowed  two  cups  of  his 
ffwcm'-coffee,  eugh !  such  stuff  !)  he  resumed  his  toilet,  by 
drawing  out  of  his  other  trunk,  his  blue  surtout,  with 
embossed  silk  buttons  and  velvet  collar,  and  an  outside 
pocket  in  the  left  breast.  Having  smoothed  down  a  few 
creases,  he  put  it  on :— then,  before  the  little  vulgar  fraction 
of  a  glass  he  stood  twitching  about  the  collar,  and  sleeves, 
and  front,  so  as  to  make  them  sit  well ;  concluding  with  a 
careful  elongation  of  the  wrist-bands  of  his  shirt  so  as  to 
show  their  whiteness  gracefully  beyond  the  cuff  of  his  coat- 
sleeve— and  he  succeeded  in '  producing  a  sort  of  white 
boundary  line  between  the  blue  of  his  coat-sleeve  and  the 
red  of  his  hand.  At  that  useful  member  he  could  not  help 
looking  with  a  sigh,  as  he  had  often  done  before— for  it  was 
not  a  handsome  hand.  It  was  broad  and  red,  and  the  fingers 
were  thick  and  stumpy,  with  very  coarse  deep  wrinkles  at 
every  joint.  His  nails  also  were  flat  and  shapeless ;  and  he 
used  to  be  continually  gnawing  them  till  he  had  succeeded 
in  getting  them  down  to  the  quick— and  they  were  a  sight  to 
set  one  s  teeth  on  edge.  Then  he  extracted  from  the  first 
mentioned  trunk  a  white  pocket-handkerchief— an  exemplary 
one,  that  had  gone  through  four  Sundays'  show,  (not  use,  be 


TEN  THOUSAND  A-YEAE.  15 

1  j  understood,)  and  yet  was  capable  of  exhibition  again.  A 
pair  of  sky-colored  kid  gloves  next  made  their  appearance  : 
which,  however,  showed  such  bare-faced  marks  of  former 
service  as  rendered  indispensable  a  ten  minutes'  rubbing 
•\yith  bread  crumbs.  His  Sunday  hat,  carefully  covered  with 
silver  paper,  was  next  gently  removed  from  its  well-worn 
box— an,  how  lightly  and  delicately  did  he  pass  his  smooth- 
ing hand  round  its  glossy  surface !  Lastly,  he  took  down  a 
thin  black  cane,  with  a  gilt  head,  and  full  brown  tassel, 
from  a  peg  behind  the  door — and  his  toilet  was  complete. 
Laying  down  his  cane  for  a  moment,  he  passed  his  hands 
again  through  his  hair,  arranging  it  so  as  to  fall  nicely  on 
each  side  beneath  his  hat,  which  he  then  placed  upon  his 
head,  with  an  elegant  inclination  towards  the  left  side.  He 
was  really  not  bad-looking,  in  spite  of  his  sandy-colored  hair. 
His  forehead,  to  be  sure,  was  contracted,  and  his  eyes  were 
of  a  very  light  color,  and  a  trifle  too  protuberant ;  but  his 
mouth  was  rather  well-formed,  and  being  seldom  closed, 
exhibited  very  beautiful  teeth;  and  his  nose  was  of  that 
description  which  generally  passes  for  a  Roman  nose.  His 
countenance  wore  generally  a  smile,  and  was  expressive  of — 
self-satisfaction :  and  surely  any  expression  is  better  than 
none  at  all.  As  for  there  being  the  slightest  trace  of  intellect 
in  it,  I  should  be  misleading  the  reader  if  I  were  to  say  any- 
thing of  the  sort.  In  height,  he  was  about  five  feet  and  a 
quarter  of  an  inch,  in  his  boots,  and  he  was  rather  strongly 
set,  with  a  little  tendency  to  round  shoulders :  but  his  limbs 
were  pliant,  and  his  motions  nimble. 

Here  you  have,  then,  Mr.  Tittlebat  Titmouse  to  the  life — 
certainly  no  more  than  an  average  sample  of  his  kind ;  but 
as  he  is  to  go  through  a  considerable  variety  of  situation  and 
circumstance,  I  thought  you  would  like  to  have  him  as  dis- 
tinctly before  your  mind  s  eye  as  it  was  in  my  power  to  pre- 
sent him. — Well — he  put  his  hat  on  as  I  have  said;  buttoned 
the  lowest  two  buttons  of  his  surt9ut,  and  stuck  his  white 
pocket  handkerchief  into  the  outside  pocket  in  front,  as  al- 
ready mentioned,  anxiously  disposing  it  so  as  to  let  a  little  of  it 
appear  above  the  edge  of  the  pocket,  with  a  sort  of  careful 
carelessness — a  graceful  contrast  to  the  blue ;  drew  on  his 
gloves,  took  his  cane  in  his  hand ;  drained  the  last  sad  remnant 
of  infusion  of  chicory  in  his  coffee  cup ;  and  the  sun  shining  in 
the  full  bplendor  of  a  July  noon,  and  promising  a  glorious 
day,  forth  sallied  this  poor  fellow,  an  Oxford  Street  Adonis, 
going  forth  conquering  and  to  conquer !  Petty  finery  with- 
out, a  pinched  and  stinted  stomach  within ;  a  case  of  Back 
versus  Belly,  (az  the  lawyers  would  say,)  the  plaintiff  winning 
in  a  canter !  Forth  sallied,  I  say,  Mr.  Titnwuse,  as  also  sallied 
forth  that  day  some  five  or  six  thousand  similar  personages, 
down  the  narrow,  creaking,  close  staircase,  which  he  had  not 
quitted  before  he  heard  exclaimed  from  an  opposite  window, 
"  My  eyes !  a'n't  that  a  swell ! "  He  felt  how  true  the  obser* 


16  TEN  THOUSAND  A-YEAR. 

vation  was,  and  that  at  that  moment  he  was  somewhat  outof 
his  element;  so  he  hurried  on  and  soon  reached  the  great 
broad  street,  apostrophized  by  the  celebrated  Opium-Eater, 
with  bitter  feeling,  as—"  Oxford  Street !— stony-hearted  step- 
mother !  Thou  that  listenest  to  the  sighs  of  orphans,  and 
drinkest  the  tears  of  children!"  Here,  though  his  spirits 
were  not  just  then  very  buoyant,  our  poor  little  dandy  breath- 
ed more  freely  than  when  ne  was  passing  through  the  nasty 
crowded  court  (Closet  Court)  which  he  had  just  quitted.  He 
passed  and  met  hundreds,  who,  like  himself,  seemed  released 
tor  a  precious  day's  interval  from  miserable  confinement 
and  slavery  during  the  week;  but  there  were  riot  very  many  of 
them  who  could  vie  with  him  in  elegance  of  appearance— and 
that  was  a  luxury!  Who  could  do  justice  to  the  air  with 
which  he  strutted  along !  He  felt  as  happy,  poor  soul,  in  his 
little  ostentation,  as  his  Corinthian  rival  in  tip-top  turn-out, 
after  twice  as  long,  and  as  anxious,  and  fifty  times  as  expen- 
sive, preparations  for  effective  public  display !  Nay,  my  poor 
swell  was  in  some  respects  greatly  the  superior  of  such  a  one 
as  I  have  alluded  to.  Mr.  Titmouse  did,  to  a  great  degree, 
bedizen  his  back — at  the  expense  of  his  belly ;  whereas,  the 
Corinthian  exquisite,  too  often  taking  advantage  of  station 
and  influence,  recklessly  both  pampers  his  luxurious  appetite 
within,  and  decorates  his  person  without,  at  the  expense  of 
innumerable  heart>aching  creditors.  I  do  not  mean,  how- 
ever, to  claim  any  real  merit  for  Mr.  Titmouse  on  this  score, 
because  I  am  not  sure  how  he  would  act  if  he  were  to  be- 
come possessed  of  his  magnificent  rival's  means  and  oppor- 
tunities for  the  perpetration  of  gentlemanly  frauds  on  a 
splendid  scale.— But  we  shall  perhaps  see  by  and  by. 

Mr.  Titmouse  walked  along  with  leisurely  step ;  for  haste 
and  perspiration  were  vulgar,  and  he  had  the  day  before  him, 
Observe,  now,  the  careless  glance  of  self-satisfaction  with 
which  he  occasionally  regards  his  bright  boots,  with  their 
martial  appendage,  giving  out  a  faint  clinking  sound  as  he 
heavily  treads  the  broad  flags ;  his  spotless  trousers,  his 
tight  surtout,  and  the  tip  of  white  handkerchief  peeping 
accidentally  out  in  front !  A  pleasant  sight  it  was  to  behold 
him  m  a  chance  rencontre  with  some  one  genteel  enough  to 
be  recognized— as  he  stood,  resting  on  his  left  leg ;  his  left 
arm  stuck  upon  his  hip :  his  right  leg  easily  bent  outwards ; 
his  right  hand  lightly  holding  his  ebon  cane,  with  the  gilt 
head  of  which  he  occasionally  tapped  his  teeth ;  and  his  eyes 
half  closed,  scrutinizing  the  face  and  figure  of  each  "pretty 
gal  as  she  passed,  and  to  whom  he  had  a  delicious  conscious- 
ness that  he  appeared  an  object  of  interest !  This  was  indeed 
HAPPINESS,  as  far  as  his  forlorn  condition  could  admit  of  his 
enjoying  it.— He  had  no  particular  object  in  view.  A  tiff 
Ole-r'?1iht  Ylth  tv°  of  his  shopmates  had  broken  off  a  party 
«rftey  ^d  agreed  the  Sunday  preceding  in  forming,  to 
go  that  day  to  Greenwich ;  and  this  trifling  circumstance  had 


TEN  THOUSAND  A-YEAK.  17 

*.  little  soured  his  temper,  depressed  as  were  his  spirits  be- 
fore. He  resolved  to-day  to  walk  straight  on,  and  dine  some- 
where a  little  way  out  of  town,  by  way  of  passing  the  time  till 
four  o'clock,  at  which  hour  he  intended  to  make  his  appear- 
ance in  Hyde  Park,  "  to  see  the  swells  and  the  fashions," 
which  was  his  favorite  Sunday  occupation. 

His  condition  was,  indeed,  forlorn  in  the  extreme.  To  say 
nothing  of  his  prospects  in  life— what  was  his  present  con- 
dition ?  A  shopman,  with  £35  a  year,  out  of  which  he  had  to 
find  his  clothing,  washing,  lodging,  and  all  other  incidental 
expenses— his  board  being  found  him  by  his  employers !  He 
was  five  weeks  in  arrear  to  his  landlady— a  corpulent  old 
termagant,  whom  nothing  could  have  induced  him  to  risk 
offending  but  his  over-mastering  love  of  finery ;  for  I  grieve 
to  say,  that  this  deficiency  had  been  occasioned  by  his  pur- 
chase of  the  ring  he  then  wore  with  so  much  pride.  How  he 
had  contrived  to  pacify  her — lie  upon  lie  he  must  have  had 
recourse  to — I  know  not.  He  was  in  debt,  too,  to  his  poor 
washerwoman  in  five  or  six  shillings  for  at  least  a  quarter's 
washing ;  and  owed  five  times  that  amount  to  a  little  old 
tailor,  who,  with  huge  spectacles  on  his  nose,  turned  up  to 
him,  out  of  a  little  cupboard  which  he  occupied  in  Closet 
Court,  and  which  Titmouse  had  to  pass  whenever  he  went 
to  or  from  his  lodgings,  a  lean,  sallow,  wrinkled  face,  im- 

Eloring  him  to  "  settle  iris  small  account."     All  the  cash  in 
and  which  he  had  to  meet  contingencies  between  that  day 
and  quarter-day,  which  was  six  weeks  off,  was  about  twenty- 
six  shillings,  of  which  he  had  taken  one  for  the  present  day's 
expenses ! 

Revolving  these  somewhat  disheartening  matters  in  his 
mind,  he  passed  easily  and  leisurely  along  the  whole  length 
of  Oxford  Street.  No  one  could  have  judged  from  his  dressy 
appearance,  the  constant  smirk  on  his  face,  and  his  confident 
air,  how  very  miserable  that  poor  little  dandy  was ;  but  three- 
fourths  of  his  misery  were  occasioned  by  the  impossibility 
he  felt  of  his  ever  being  able  to  indulge  in  his  propensities  for 
finery  and  display.  Nothing  better  had  he  to  occupy  his  few 
thoughts.  He  Had  had  only  a  plain  mercantile  education,  as  it  is 
called,  i.  e.  reading,  writing,  and  arithmetic  :  beyond  a  very 
moderate  acquaintance  with  these,  ho  knew  nothing  what- 
ever ;  not  having  read  more  than  a  few  novels,  and  plays,  and 
sporting  newspapers.  Deplorable,  however,  as  were  his  cir- 
cumstances— 

"  Hope  springs  eternal  in  the  human  breast." 

And  probably,  in  common  with  most  who  are  miserable  from 
straitened  circumstances,  he  often  conceived,  and  secretly 
relied  upon,  the  possibility  of  some  unexpected  and  accident- 
al change  for  the  better :  he  had  heard  and  read  of  extraordi- 
nary cases  of  LUCK,  Why  might  he  not  be  one  of  the  LUCKY  ? 


lg  TEN  THOUSAND  A-YEAE. 

. 

A  rich  girl  might  fall  in  love  with  him— that  was,  poor  fellow! 
in  his  consideration,  one  of  the  least  unlikely  ways  of  lucks 
advent ;  or  some  one  might  leave  him  money  ;  or  he  might 
win  a  prize  in  the  lottery ;— all  these,  and  other  accidental 
modes  of  getting  enriched,  frequently  occurred  to  the  well- 
regulated  mind  of  Mr.  Tittlebat  Titmouse ;  but  he  never  once 
thought  of  one  thing,  viz.  of  determined,  unwearying  indus- 
try and  perseverance  in  the  way  of  his  business,  conducing  to 
such  a  result. 

Is  his  case  a  solitary  one  ?— Dear  reader,  you  may  be  unlike 
poor  Tittlebat  Titmouse  in  every  respect  except  one  ! 

On  he  walked  towards  Bayswater ;  and  finding  it  was  yet 
early,  and  considering  that  the  further  he  went  from  town 
the  better  prospect  there  was  of  his  being  able,  with  little 
sacrifice  of  appearances,  to  get  a  dinner  consistent  with  the 
means  he  carried  about  with  him,  viz.  one  shilling,  he  pursued 
his  way  a  mile  or  two  beyond  Bayswater,  and,  sure  enough, 
came  at  length  upon  a  nice  little  public  house  on  the  road-side, 
called  the  Squaretoes  Arms.  Very  tired,  and  very  dusty,  he  first 
sat  down  in  a  small  back  room  to  rest  himself;  and  took  the 
opportunity  to  call  for  a  clothes-brush  and  shoe-brush,  to  re- 
lieve his  clothes  and  boots  from  the  heavy  dust  upon  them. 
Having  thus  attended  to  his  outer  man,  as  far  as  circum- 
stances would  permit,  he  bethought  himself  of  his  inner  man, 
whose  cravings  he  satisfied  with  a  pretty  substantial  muttori- 
pie  and  a  pint  of  porter.  This  fare,  together  with  a  penny  to 
the  little  girl  who  waited  on  him,  cost  him  tenpence ;  and 
having  somewhat  refreshed  himself,  he  began  to  think  of  re- 
turning to  town.  Haying  lit  one  of  his  two  cigars,  he  sallied 
forth,  puffing  along  with  an  air  of  quiet  enjoyment.  Dinner, 
however  humble,  seldom  fails,  especially  when  accompanied 
by  a  fair  draught  of  good  porter,  in  some  considerable  degree 
to  tranquillize  the  animal  spirits ;  and  that  soothing  effect 
began  soon  to  be  experienced  by  Mr.  Titmouse.  The  sedative 
cause  he  erroneously  considered  to  be  the  cigar  he  was  smok- 
ing; whereas  in  fact  the  only  tobacco  he  had  inbibed  was 
from  the  porter.  But,  however  that  might  be,  he  certainly 
returned  towards  town  in  a  far  calmer  and  even  more  cheer- 
ful humor  than  that  in  which  he  had  quitted  it  an  hour  or 
two  before. 

As  he  approached  Cumberland  Gate,  it  was  about  half-past 
five ;  and  the  Park  might  be  said  to  be  at  its  acme  of  fashion, 
as  far  as  that  could  be  indicated  by  a  sluggish  stream  of  car. 
riages,  three  and  four  abreast  —  coroneted,  panels  in  abun- 
dance— noble  and  well  known  equestrians  of  both  sexes,  in 
troops— and  some  thousand  pedestrians  of  the  same  descrip- 
tion. So  continuous  was  the  throng  of  carriages  and  horsemen, 
that  Titmouse  did  not  find  it  the  easiest  matter  in  the  world 
to  dart  across  to  the  footpath  in  the  inner  circle.  That,  how- 
ever, he  presently  safely  accomplished,  encountering  no 
more  serious  mischance  than  the  muttered  "D— n  your  eyes  I1* 


TEN  THOUSAND  A-TEAE.  19 

of  a  haughty  groom,  between  whom  and  his  master  Mr.  Tit- 
mouse had  presumed  to  intervene.  What  a  crowd  of  elegant 
women,  many  of  them  young  and  beautiful,  (who  but  such, 
to  be  sure,  would  become,  or  be  allowed  to  become,  pedestrians 
in  the  Park  ?)  he  encountered,  as  he  slowly  sauntered  on, 
all  of  them  obsequiously  attended  by  brilliant  beaux !  Lords 
and  ladies  were  here  manifestly  as  plentiful  as  plebeians  in 
Oxford  Street.  What  an  enchanted  ground  ! — How  delicious 
this  soft  crush  and  nutter  of  aristocracy  !  Poor  Titmouse 
felt  a  withering  consciousness  of  his  utter  insignificance. 
Many  a  sigh  of  dissatisfaction  and  envy  escaped  him  ;  yet 
he  stepped  along  with  a  tolerably  assured  air,  looking  every- 
body he  met  straight  in  the  face,  and  occasionally  twirling 
about  his  little  cane  with  an  air  which  seemed  to  say— 
"  Whatever  opinion  you  may  form  of  me,  I  have  a  very  good 
opinion  of  myself."  Indeed,  was  he  not  as  much  a  man — an 
Englishman— as  the  best  of  them  ?  What  was  the  real  dif- 
ference between  Count  Do-'em-all  and  Mr.  Tittlebat  Tit- 
mouse ?  Only  that  the  Count  had  dark  hair  and  whiskers,  and 
owed  more  money  than  Mr.  Titmouse's  creditors  could  be 
persuaded  to  allow  him  to  owe  !  Would  to  Heaven— thought 
Titmouse — that  any  one  tailor  would  patronize  him  as  half-a- 
dozen  had  patronized  the  Count !  If  pretty  ladies  of  quality 
did  not  disdain  a  walking  advertisement  of  a  few  first-rate 
tailors,  like  the  Count,  why  should  they  turn  up  their  noses 
at  an  assistant  in  an  extensive  wholesale  and  retail  establish- 
ment in  Oxford  Street,  conversant  with  the  qualities  and 
prices  of  the  most  beautiful  articles  of  female  attire  ?  Yet 
alas,  they  did  so  !  He  sighed  heavily.  Leaning  against  the 
railing  in  a  studied  attitude,  and  eyeing  wistfully  each  gay 
and  fashionable  equipage,  with  its  often  lovely  and  some- 
times haughty  enclosure,  as  it  rolled  slowly  past  him,  Mr. 
Titmouse  became  more  and  more  convinced  of  a  great  prac- 
tical truth,  viz.  that  the  only  real  distinction  between  man- 
kind was  that  affected  by  money.  Want  of  money  alone  had 
placed  him  in  his  present  abject  position.  Abject  indeed  ! 
By  the  great  folk,  who  vyere  passing  him  on  all  sides,  he 
felt,  well  dressed  as  he  believed  nimself  to  be,  that  he  was  no 
more  noticed  than  as  if  he  had  been  an  ant,  a  blue-bottle  fly, 
or  a  black  beetle !  He  looked,  and  sighed— sighed,  and  looked 
— looked,  and  sighed  again,  in  a  kind  of  agony  of  vain  longing. 
While  his  only  day  in  the  week  for  breathing  fresh  air,  and 
appearing  like  a  gentleman  in  the  world,  was  rapidly  drawing 
to  a  close,  and  he  was  beginning  to  think  of  returning  to  the 
dog-hole  he  had  crawled  out  of  in  the  morning,  and  to  the 
shop  for  the  rest  of  the  week ;  the  great,  and  gay,  and  happy 
folk  he  was  looking  at,  were  thinking  of  driving  home  to  dress 
for  their  grand  dinners,  and  to  lay  out  every  kind  of  fine 
amusement  for  the  ensuing  week,  and  that  was  the  sort  of 
life  they  led  every  day  in  the  week.  He  heaved  a  profound 
sigh.  At  that  moment  a  superb  cab,  with  a  gentleman  in  it 


:• 


r_    .--_-          :~r .-i~. 


m  rr^: 

L  a  cabof  sliUnMnvcsqpoBBfesfinct 
at  wMdhi  Titmoase  gand  wish 
ir^lJMj^  of  emrjr— in  whicb  sat  a  jaang  man. 
cuMeullj  of  eoaoeaaenee;  i«y  handsome,  wUh  BfiiKiidii 
Hiliiaiiil^  liiailiiiir    theiemsand 
g&tening:  in  sfiraw  colored.  kM 


..  ',  .••-..._  .-    •    -. : -  -       •-  •    .-. .  •_  -      -    -. ••-:;• 
snap1eton|ai  Tlliainiivr  most^I  fear, by  tti»y 

'  ia>  thj*  ^jfdf  •}  ffBfH  |q»y  oo^riiff^nl. 

*AhTTiEr!*T  said  the  Jiaaa-i  ayniinnrd  p  mill  IB  HI  to  the 
laj^  who -mddrBlyCTddnBrd  when  be  popEiied  who  bad 

addresBed  nua_  The  manner  of  the  speaker  was  f  Eii"i  jiMy 
— mfrraaDy  fiunffiar  and  jmaiDBptooas— bnthowcoold  the 
hdp  hiuuUf  ?— *  When  did  jva  return  to 


:-:-.--    -..-    :-:--;   .  ••        — 

^  ":   :   :  .--    -:--;-:•.--•..-  .-— -:  -   .-    •:  -.-  [_-_   ,  ;••      •-    :  ^ 
— i~= — '  the  -"••'•'•i  of  lri»  eonmanion •  "bat  can't  " 


"  -   -•-"-"   ~   i-   -    '    -      ".r   .---.:    .-    -  ::      ::.--•-. 
^yMJieafly  •••!  luA  sharp,  or  the  thing  wmt  go  on 

**]&•*  it  be,  na^?w  iBMrad  tte  otter,  latiK  hn 
as  fl      ••••i  nil  I  iaiiim,  highaadto»TCiybeantifilgjrl.wfao 
hat  ma  caoronetcd  ehariot—  "most  it  really 
fanaJag  towards  hjge^^*™""!  a  pale 
coontenanee. 

dean>  hwerer,  and  not  Terj 

the  other,  banjo*: 


an-  o<  mfanae  earnratwon    "The  feet 
anjn' 


irs  the  fact!" 


TEN  THOUSAND  A-YEAE.  21 

"Between  ourselves,  he  is  rather  a  sharp  hand.  Then, 
I'm  sorry  to  say  there's  a  detainer  or  two  I  have  had  a 
hint  of " 

"  D — n  their  souls ! "  exclaimed  the  other,  with  an  expres- 
sion of  mingled  disgust,  vexation,  and  hatred ;  and  adding, 
"  Wednesday— nine  " — drove  off,  a  picture  of  tranquil  enjoy- 
ment. 

I  need  hardly  say  that  he  was  a  fashionable  young  spend- 
thrift, and  the  other  a  sheriff's  officer  of  the  first  water — the 
fenteelest  beak  that  ever  was  known  or  heard  of— who  had 
een  on  the  look-out  for  him  several  days,  and  with  whom 
the  happy  voungster  was  doomed  to  spend  some  considerable 
time  at  a  cheerful  residence  in  Chancery  Lane,  bleeding  gold 
at  every  pore  the  while ;  his  only  chance  of  avoiding  which, 
was,  as  he  had  truly  hinted,  an  honorable  attempt  on  the 
purses  of  two  hospitable  country  cousins,  in  the  mean  while, 

at  C 's  !  And  if  he  did  not  succeed  in  that  enterprise,  so 

that  he  must  go  to  cage,  he  lost  the  only  chance  he  had  for 
some  time  of  securing  an  exemption  for  such  annoyance,  by 
entering  Parliament  to  protect  the  liberties  of  the  people — an 
eloquent  and  resolute  champion  of  freedom  in  trade,  religion, 
and  everything  else ;  and  an  abolitionist  of  everything,  in- 
cluding, especially,  negro  slavery  and  imprisonment  for  debt 
— two  execrable  violations  of  the  natural  rights  of  mankind. 

But  I  have,  for  several  minutes,  lost  sight  of  the  admiring 
Titmouse. 

"Why,"  thought  he,  "am  I  thus  spited  by  fortune?— The 
only  thing  she's  given  me  is — nothing! — D — n  everything  !  " 
exclaimed  Mr.  Titmouse  aloud,  at  the  same  time  starting  off, 
to  the  infinite  astonishment  of  an  old  peer,  who  had  been  for 
some  minutes  standing  leaning  against  the  railing,  close 
beside  him ;  who  was  master  of  a  magnificent  fortune, "  with 
all  appliances  and  means  to  boot ; "  with  a  fine  grown-up 
family,  his  eldest  son  and  heir  having  just  gained  a  Double 
First,  and  promising  wonders ;  possessing  many  mansions 
in  different  parts  of  England ;  of  exquisite  taste  and  accom- 
plishment; and  the  representative  of  one  of  the  oldest 
families  in  England ;  but  who  at  that  moment  loathed  every- 
thing and  everybody,  including  himself,  because  the  minister 
had  the  day  before  intimated  to  him  that  he  could  not  give 
him  a  vacant  ribbon,  for  which  he  had  applied,  unless  he 
could  command  two  more  votes  in  the  Lower  House,  and 
which  at  present  his  lordship  saw  no  earthly  means  of  doing. 
Yes,  the  Earl  of  Cheviotdale  and  Mr.  Tittlebat  Titmouse 
were  both  miserable  men  ;  both  had  been  hardly  dealt  with 
by  fortune ;  both  were  greatly  to  be  pitied  -}  and  both  quitted 
tne  Park,  about  the  same  time,  with  a  decided  misanthropic 
tendency. 

Mr.  Titmouse  walked  along  Piccadilly  with  a  truly  chop- 
fallen  and  disconsolate  air.  He  almost  felt  dissatisfied 
even  with  his  personal  appearance.  Dress  as  he  would,  no 


22  TEN  THOUSAND  A-YEAR. 

one  seemed  to  care  a  curse  for  him  ;  and,  to  his  momentarily 
jaundiced  eye,  he  seemed  equipped  in  only  second-hand  and 
shabby  finery :  and  then  he  was  really  such  a  poor  devil  !— 
j5o  not,  however,  let  the  reader  suppose  that  this  was  an  un- 
usual mood  with  Mr.  Titmouse.  No  such  thing.  Like  the 
Irishman  who  "  married  a  wife  for  to  make  him  un-aisy;  " 
and  also  not  unlike  the  moth  that  will  haunt  the  brightness 
which  is  her  destruction ;  so  poor  Titmouse,  Sunday  after 
Sunday,  dressed  himself  out  as  elaborately  as  he  had  done 
on  the  present  occasion,  and  then  always  betook  himself  to 
the  scene  he  had  just  again  witnessed,  and  which  once  again 
had  excited  only  those  feelings  of  envy,  bitterness,  and  de- 
spair, which  I  have  been  describing,  and  which,  on  every  such 
occasion,  he  experienced  with,  if  possible,  increased  in- 
tensity. 

What  to  do  with  himself  till  it  was  time  to  return  to  his 
cheerless  lodgings  he  did  not  exactly  know ;  so  he  loitered 
along  at  a  snail's  pace.  He  stood  for  some  time  staring  at 
the  passengers,  their  luggage,  the  coaches  they  were  ascend- 
ing and  alighting  from,  and  listening  to  the  strange  medley 
of  coachmen's,  guards',  and  porters'  vociferations,  and 
passengers'  greetings  and  leave-takings — always  to  be  ob- 
served at  the  White  Horse  Cellar.  Then  he  passed  along, 
till  a  street  row,  near  the  Haymarket,  attracted  his  attention 
and  interested  his  feelings  ;  for  it  ended  in  a  regular  set-to 
between  two  watermen  attached  to  the  adjoining  coach- 
stand.  Here  he  conceived  himself  looking  on  with  the  easy 
air  of  a  swell :  and  the  ordinary  penalty  (paying  for  his  foot- 
ing) was  attempted  to  be  exacted  from  him ;  but  he  had 
nothing  to  be  picked  out  of  any  of  his  pockets  except  that 
under  his  very  nose,  and  which  contained  his  white  hand- 
kerchief. This  over,  he  struck  into  Leicester  Square,  where, 
(he  was  in  luck  that  night,)  hurrying  up  to  another  crowd  at 
the  further  end,  he  found  a  man  preaching  with  infinite 
energy.  Mr.  Titmouse  looked  on,  and  listened  for  two  or 
three  minutes  with  apparent  interest ;  and  then,  with  a 
countenance  in  which  pity  struggled  with  contempt,  mut- 
tered, loud  enough  to  be  heard  by  all  near  him, "  poor  devil !  " 
and  walked  off.  He  had  not  proceeded  many  steps,  before 
it  occurred  to  him  that  a  friend— one  Robert  Huckaback, 
much  such  another  one  as  himself— lived  in  one  of  the  narrow, 
dingy  streets  in  the  neighborhood.  He  determined  to  take 
the  chances  of  his  being  at  home,  and  if  so,  of  spending  the 
remainder  of  the  evening  with  him.  Huckaback's  quarters 
were  in  the  same  ambitious  proximity  to  heaven  as  his  own : 
the  only  difference  being,  that  they  were  a  trifle  cheaper  and 
larger.  He  answered  the  door  himself,  having  only  the 
moment  before  returned  from  his  Sunday's  excursion.— i.  e, 
the  Jack  Straw's  Castle  Tea-Gardens,  at  Highgate,  where,  in 
company  with  several  of  his  friends,  he  had  "  spent  a  jolly 
alternoon.  He  ordered  in  a  glass  of  negus  from  the  adjoin- 


TEN  THOUSAND  A-TEAR.  23 

ing  public-house,  after  some  discussion,  which  ended  in  an 
agreement  that  he  should  stand  treat  that  night,  and  Tit- 
mouse on  the  ensuing  Sunday  night.  As  soon  as  the  negus 
arrived,  accompanied  by  two  sea-biscuits,  which  looked  so 
hard  and  hopeless  that  they  would  have  made  the  nerves 
thrill  within  the  teeth  of  him  that  meditated  attempting  to 
masticate  them,  the  candle  was  lit — Huckaback  handed  a 
cigar  to  his  friend ;  and  both  began  to  puff  away,  and  chatter 
pleasantly  concerning  the  many  events  and  scenes  of  the  day. 

"Anything  stirring  in  to-day's  'Flash? ' "  inquired  Titmouse, 
as  his  eye  caught  sight  of  a  copy  of  that  able  and  interesting 
Sunday  newspaper,  the  "  SUNDAY  FLASH,"  which  Huckaback 
had  hired  for  the  evening  from  the  news-shop  on  the  ground- 
floor  of  his  lodgings. 

Mr.  Huckaback  removed  his  cigar  from  his  mouth,  and 
holding  it  between  the  first  and  second  fingers  of  his  right 
hand,  in  a  knowing  style,  with  closed  eyes  and  inflated  cheeks 
very  slowly  ejected  the  smoke  which  he  had  last  inhaled, 
and  rose  and  got  the  paper  from  the  top  of  the  drawers. 

"  Here's  a  mark  of  a  beastly  porter-pot  that's  been  set  upon 
it,  by  all  that's  holy !  It's  been  at  the  public-house  !  Too  bad 
of  Mrs-  Coggs  to  send  it  me  up  in  this  state !  "  said  he,  hand- 
ling it  as  though  its  touch  were  contamination. — (He  was  to 
pay  only  a  halfpenny  for  the  perusal  of  it.)  "  Faugh !  how  it 
stinks ! " 

"  What  a  horrid  beast  she  must  be  !  "  exclaimed  Titmouse, 
after,  in  like  manner  as  his  friend,  expelling  his  mouthful  of 
smoke.  "  But,  since  better  can't  be  had,  let's  hear  what 
news  is  in  it.  Demmee !  it's  the  only  paper  published,  in  my 
opinion,  that's  worth  reading!  Any  fights  astirring?" 

"  Haven't  come  to  them  yet ;  give  a  man  time,  Titty ! " 
replied  Huckaback,  fixing  his  feet  on  another  chair,  and 
drawing  the  candle  closer  to  the  paper.  "  It  says,  by  the 
way,  that  the  Duke  of  Dunderhead  is  certainly  making 
up  to  Mrs.  Thumps,  the  rich  cheesemonger's  widow; — a 
precious  good  hit  that,  isn't  it?  You  know  the  Duke's 
as  poor  as  a  rat  ?  " 

Oh!  that' s  no  news.  It's  been  in  the  papers  for  I  don't 
know  how  long.  Egad,  'twill  quite  set  him  up— and  no  mis- 
take. Seen  the  Duke  ever  ?  " 

"  Ye— es !  Oh,  several  times !  "  replied  Huckaback.  This 
was  a  lie,  and  Huckaback  knew  that  it  was. 

"  Deuced  good-looking,  I  suppose  ?" 

"  Why — middling ;  I  should  say  middling.  Know  some 
that  needn't  fear  to  compare  with  him — eh!  Tit?" — and 
Huckaback  winked  archly  at  his  friend,  meaning  him  to  con- 
sider the  words  as  applicable  to  the  speaker. 

"  Ah,  ha,  ha ! — a  pretty  joke !  But  come,  that's  a  good 
chap !— You  can't  be  reading  both  of  those  two  sheets  at  once 
— give  us  the  other  sheet,  and  set  the  candle  right  betwixt 
us !— Come,  fair's  the  word ! " 


24  TEN  THOUSAND  A-YEAR. 

Huckaback,  thus  appealed  to,  did  as  his  friend  requested  j 
and  the  two  gentlemen  read  and  smoked  for  some  minutes  in 
silence. 

"  Well— I  shall  spell  over  the  advertisements  now,"  said 
Titmouse ;  "  there's  a  pretty  Iot9f  them— and  I've  read  every- 
thing else— (though  precious  little  there  is  here,  besides !) 
—So,  here  goes  !— One  may  hear  of  a  prime  situation,  you 
know— and  I'm  quite  sick  of  Tag-rag  !  " 

Another  interval  of  silence  ensued.  Huckaback  was  deep 
in  the  instructive  details  of  a  trial  for  murder ;  and  Titmouse 
after  having  glanced  listlessly  over  the  entertaining  first 
sheet  of  advertisements,  was  on  the  point  of  laying  down  his 
half  of  the  paper,  when  he  suddenly  started  in  his  chair, 
turned  very  pale,  and  stammered — 

"Hollo  !  hollo,  Hucky !— Why— 

"What's  the  matter,  Tit?— eh?"  inquired  Huckaback, 
greatly  astonished. 

For  a  moment  Titmouse  made  no  answer,  but,  dropping 
his  cigar,  fixed  his  eves  intently  on  the  paper,  which  began 
to  rustle  in  his  trembling  hands.  What  occasioned  this  out- 
break, with  its  subsequent  agitation,  was  the  following  ad- 
vertisement, which  appeared  in  the  most  conspicuous  part  of 
the  "  SUNDAY  FLASH  :  — 

"  NEXT  OF  KIN — Important. —  The  next  of  kin,  if  any  such 
there  be,  of  GABRIEL  TITTLEBAT  TITMOUSE,  formerly  of 
WHITEHAVEN,  cordwainer,  and  who  died  somewhere  about 
the  year  1793,  in  London,  may  hear  of  something  of  the  GREAT- 
EST POSSIBLE  IMPORTANCE  to  himself,  or  herself,  or  themselves, 
by  immediately  communicating  with  Messrs.  QUIRK,  GAM- 
MON, and  SNAP,  Solicitors,  Saftron  Hill.  No  time  is  to  be 
lost.  0th  July,  18— .  — The  third  advertisement." 

**  By  George !  Here  is  a  go  ! "  exclaimed  Huckaback, 
almost  as  much  flustered  as  Titmouse,  over  whose-shoulder 
he  had  hastily  read  the  above  paragraph. 

"  We  aren*t  dreaming,  Hucky— are  we !  "  inquired  Tit- 
mouse, faintly,  his  eyes  still  glued  to  the  newspaper. 

"  No— by  George !  Never  was  either  of  us  fellows  so  pre- 
cious wide  awake  in  our  lives  before  !  that  I'll  answer  for !  " 
Titmouse  sat  still,  and  turned  paler  even  than  before. 

"  Read  it  up,  Huck  !— Let's  hear  how  it  sounds,  and  then 
we  shall  believe  it !  "  said  he,  handing  the  paper  to  his  friend. 

Huckaback  read  it  aloud. 

"  It  sounds  like  something,  don't  it?"  inquired  Titmouse 
tremulously,  his  color  a  little  returning. 

"  Uncommon !— If  this  isn't  something,  then  there's  noth- 
ing in  anything  anymore !  "  replied  Huckaback  solemnly,  at 
the  same  time  emphatically  slapping  the  table. 

'  No !— 'Pon  my  soul !  but  do  you  really  think  so  ?  "  said 
Titmouse,  seeking  still  further  confirmation  than  he  had  yet 
derived  from  his  senses  of  sight  and  hearing. 

"  I  do,  by  jingo !— What  a  go  it  is !— Well,  my  poor  old 


TEN  THOUSAND  A-TEAE.  25 

mother  used  to  say, '  depend  on  it,  wonders  never  will  cease; ' 
and  curse  me  if  she  ever  said  a  truer  word ! " 

Titmouse  again  read  over  the  advertisement ;  and  then 
picking  up  and  relighting  his  fragment  of  cigar,  puffed  ear- 
nestly, in  silence,  for  some  moments. 

"  Such  things  never  happens  to  such  a  poor  devil  of  a  chap 
as  me !  "  exclaimed  Huckaback,  with  a  sigh. 

"  What  is  in  the  wind,  I  wonder !  "  muttered  Titmouse. 

"  Who  knows — hem ! — who  knows. — But  now,  really " 

he  paused,  and  once  more  read  over  the  pregnant  para- 
graph.— "  It  can't — no,  curse  me,  it  can't  be "  he  added, 

looking  very  serious. 

"  What,  tit?  What  can't  be  ?"  interrupted  Huckaback 
eagerly. 

"  Why,  I've  been  thinking— but  what  do  you  think,  eh  ?— it 
can't  be  a  cursed  hoax  of  the  chaps  in  the  premises  at  Tag- 
rag's  ?  " 

"  Bo ! — Is  there  any  of  'em  flush  enough  of  money  to  do  the 
thing  ?  And  how  should  they  think  it  would  ever  come  to 
be  seen  by  you  ? — Then,  besides,  there  isn't  a  chap  among 
them  that  could  come  up  to  the  composing  a  piece  of  com- 
position like  that — no,  not  for  all  a  whole  year's  salary — there 
isn't,  by  George !  You  and  I  couldn't  do  it,  and,  of  course  they 
couldn't!" 

"  Ah !  I  don't  know,"  said  Titmouse  doubtfully.  "  But— 
honor ! — do  you  really  now  think  there's  anything  in  it?  " 

"I  do — hanged  if  I  don't,  Tit!  "was  the  sententious  an- 
swer. 

"  Tol  de  rol,  de  rol,  de  rol,  de  rol — diddl'em  daddl'em — 
bang !  "almost  shouted  Titmouse,  jumping  up,  snapping  his 
fingers,  and  dancing  about  in  a  wild  ecstasy,  which  lasted  for 
nearly  a  minute. 

"  Give  me  vour  hand,  Hucky,"  said  he  presently,  almost 
breathless.  If  I  am  a  made  man— tol  de  rol,  lol  de  rol,  lol  de 
rol,  lol ! ' — you  see,  Huck ! — if  I  don't  give  you  the  handsomest 
breastpin  you  ever  saw  !  No  paste !  real  diamond!— Hurrah! 
I  will,  by  .lingo!  " 

Huckaback  grasped  and  squeezed  his  hand.  "  We've 
always  been  friends,  Tit — haven't  we  ?  "  said  he  affection- 
ately. 

"  My  room  won't  hold  me  to-night !  "  continued  Titmouse ; 
"  I'm  sure  it  won't.  I  feel  as  if  I  was,  as  you  may  say.  swell- 
ing all  over.  I'll  walk  the  streets  all  night :  I  couldirt  sleep 
a  wink  for  the  life  of  me.  I'll  walk  about  till  the  shop  opens. 
Oh,  faugh!  how  nasty!  Confound  the  shop,  and  Tag-rag, 
and  everything  and  everybody  in  it!  Thirty-five  pounds 
a-year!  See  if  I  won't  spend  as  much  in  cigars  the  first 
month ! " 

"  Cigars  !  Is  that  your  go  ?  Now,  1  should  take  lessons  in 
boxing,  to  begin  with.  It's  a  deuced  high  thing,  you  may  de- 
pend upon  it,  and  you  can't  be  fit  company  for  swells  without 
it,  Tit !  You  can't,  by  Jove ! " 


26  TEN  THOUSAND  A-YEAR. 

"  Whatever  you  like,  whatever  you  like,  Hucky !  "  cried 
Titmouse— adding,  in  a  sort  of  ecstasy,  "  I'm  sorry  to  say  it, 
but  how  precious  lucky  that  my  father  and  mother's  dead. 
and  that  I'm  an  only  child — too-ra-laddy,  too-ra-laddy ! 
Here  he  took  such  a  sudden  leap,  that  I  am  sorry  to  say 
he  split  his  trousers  very  awkwardly,  and  that  sobered 
him  f9r  a  moment,  while  they  made  arrangements  for  cob- 
bling it  up  as  well  as  it  might  be,  with  a  needle  and  thread 
which  Huckaback  always  had  by  him. 

"  We're  rather  jumping  in  the  dark  a^-bit,  aren't  we,  Tit  ?" 
inquired  Huckaback,  while  his  companion  was  repairing  the 
breach.  "  Let's  look  what  it  all  means— here  it  is.  He  read 
it  all  aloud  again — "  *  greatest  possible  importance" — "what 
can  it  mean  ?  Why  the  deuce  couldn't  they  speak  out 
plainly?"  ; 

"  What!  in  a  newspaper  ?  Lord,  Hucky !  how  many  Tit- 
mouses  would  start  up  on  all  sides,  if  there  isn't  some  already. 
I  wonder  what  ^greatest  possible  importance'  can  mean, 
now ! " 

"  Some  one's  left  you  an  awful  lot  of  money,  of  course " 

"  It's  too  good  to  be  be  true " 

"  Or  you  may  have  made  a  smite  ;  you  a'n't  such  a  bad- 
looking  fellow,  when  you're  dressed  as  you  are  now— you 
a'n't  indeed,  Titty ! "  Mr.  Titmouse  was  quite  flustered  with 
the  mere  supposition,  and  also  looked  as  sheepish  as  his  fea- 
tures would  admit  of. 

"E-e-e-eh,  Hucky !  how  ve-ry  silly  you  are ! "  he  simpered. 
Or  you  may  be  found  out  heir  to  some  great  property,  and 
all  that  kind  of  thing.— But  when  do  you  intend  to  go  to 
Messrs.  What's-their-name  ?  I  say,  the  sooner  the  better. 
Come,  you've  stitched  them  trousers  well  enough,  now; 
they  11  hold  you  till  you  get  home— you  do  brace  up  uncom- 
mon tight !  and  I'd  take  off  my  straps,  if  I  was  you.  Why 
shouldn  t  we  go  to  these  gents  now?  Ah,  here  they  are— 
Messrs.  Quirk,  Gammon,  and  Snap,  solicitors." 

I  wonder  if  they're  great  men?  Did  you  ever  hear  of 
them  before  ?  " 

"  Haven't  I !  Their  names  is  always  in  this  same  paper  ; 
they  are  every  day  getting  people  off  out  of  all  kinds  of 
scrapes— they're  the  chaps  I  should  nat'rally  go  to  if  I  any- 
how  got  wrong— ahem ! ft 

"  But,  my  dear  fellow—  Saffron  Hill!— Low  that— devilish 

M t»  P°n  my  soul !    Never  was  near  it  in  my  life." 

But  they  live  there  to  be  near  the  thieves.  Lud,  the 
thieves  couldn't  do  without  'em !  But  what's  that  to  you  ? 
You  know  '  a  very  dirty  ugly  toad  has  often  got  a  jewel  in 
his  belly,  so  Shakspeare  or  some  one  says.  Isn't  it  enough 
lor  2/0^  Tit,  if  they  can  make  good  their  advertisement? 
Let  s  ott,  lit— let's  off,  I  say ;  for  you  mayn't  be  able  to  get 
there  to-morrow— your  employers ! " 


TEN  THOUSAND  A-YEAE.  27 

"  Come,  come,  Titty — not  so  fast — suppose  it  all  turns  out 
moonshine,  after  all 5'— quoth  Huckaback,  seriously. 

" Lord,  but  I  won't  suppose  it !  It  makes  me  sick  to  think 
of  nothing  coming  of  it !— Let's  go  off  at  once,  and  see  what's 
to  be  done  !  " 

So  Huckaback  put  the  newspaper  in  his  pocket,  blew  out 
the  candle,  and  the  two  started  on  their  important  errand. 
It  was  well  that  their  means  had  been  too  limited  to  allow 
of  their  indulging  to  a  greater  extent  than  a  glass  of  port- 
wine  negus  (that  *was  the  name  under  which  they  drank  the 
"publican's  port"— i.  e.  a  decoction  of  oak  bark,  logwood 
shavings,  and  a  little  brandy)  between  them ;  otherwise, 
excited  as  were  the  feelings  of  each  of  them  by  the  discovery 
of  the  evening,  they  must  in  all  probability  have  been  guilty 
of  some  piece  of  extravagance  in  the  streets.  As  it  was,  they 
talked  very  loudly  as  they  went  along,  and  in  a  tone  of  con- 
versation pitched  perhaps  a  little  too  high  for  their  present 
circumstances,  however  in  unison  it  might  be  with  the  ex- 
pected circumstances  of  one  of  them. 

In  due  time  they  reached  the  residence  of  which  they  were 
in  search.  It  was  a  larrn  house,  infinitely  superior  to  all  its 
dingy  neighbors:  and  on  a  bright  brass  plate,  a  yard  long 
at  least,  and  a  foot  wide,  stood  the  awe-inspiring  words, 
"  QUIRK,  GAMMON,  &  SNAI\  SOLICITORS." 

"  Now,  Tit,"  whispered  Huckaback,  after  they  had  paused 
for  a  second  or  two — "  now  for  it — pluck  up  a  sperrit — ring ! " 

"  I— I — 'pon  my  life— I  feel  ai  L  of  a  sudden  uncommon 
funky — I  think  that  last  cigar  of  yours  wasn't — 

"  Stuff,  Tit— ring !  ring  away !    Faint  heart  never  wins ! " 

"  Well,  it  must  be  done ;  so — here  goes,  at  any  rate ! "  he  re- 
plied ;  and  with  a  short  nervous  jerk  he  caused  a  startling 
clatter  within,  which  was  so  distinctly  audible  without,  that 
both  of  them  instinctively  hemmed,  as  if  to  drown  the  noise 
which  was  so  much  greater  than  they  had  expected.  In  a 
very  few  moments  they  heard  somo  one  undoing  the  fasten- 
ings of  the  door,  and  the  gentlemen  looked  at  one  another 
with  an  expression  of  mingled  expectation  and  apprehension. 
A  little  old  woman  at  length  stood  before  them  with  a  candle 
in  her  hand. 

"  Who  are  you?"  she  exclaimed,  crustily. 

"  Is  this  Messrs.— what  is  it,  Huck  ?— C>h !  Messrs.  Quirk 
&  Co.'s  ? "  inquired  Titmouse,  tapping  the  end  of  his  cane 
against  his  chin,  with  a  desperate  effort  to  appear  at  his  ease. 

"Why,  where  are  your  eyes?  I  should  think  you  might 
have  seen  what  was  wrote  on  this  here  plate— it's  large 
enough,pne  should  have  thought,  to  be  read  by  them  as  can 
read !— What's  your  business  ?  " 

"  We  want — Give  us  the  paper,  Hucky  " — he  added,  address- 
ing his  companion,  who  produced  it  in  a  moment;  and 
Titmouse  would  have  proceeded  to  possess  the  old  woman  of 
all  his  little  heart,  when  she  cut  him  short  by  saying,  snap- 


28  TEN  THOUSAND  A-YEAE. 

pishly— "  They  aren't  none  on  'em  in ;  nor  never  is  on  Sun- 
days— so  you'll  just  call  to-morrow  if  you  wants  'em.  What's 
your  names  ?  " 

"  Mr.  Tittlebat  Titmouse,"  answered  that  gentleman,  with 
a  very  particular  emphasis  on  every  syllable. 

"  Mr.  who  ?  "  exclaimed  the  old  woman,  opening  her  eyes, 
and  raising  her  hand  to  the  back  of  her  ear.  Mr.  Titmouse 
(repeated  his  name  more  loudly  and  distinctly. 

"  Tippetitippety !— what's  that?" 

"No,  no!"  exclaimed  Titmouse  peevishly;  "I  said,  Mr. 
Tit-el-bat  Titmouse !— will  that  suit  you  ?  " 

"  Tick-a-tick-a-tick  ?— Well,  gracious !  if  ever  I  heard  such 
a  name.  Oh !— I  see ! — you're  making  a  fool  of  me !  Get  off, 
or  I'll  call  a  constable !— Get  along  with  you,  you  couple  of 
puppies !  Is  this  the  way " 

"  I  tell  you, "  interposed  Mr.  Huckaback  angrily, "  that  this 
gentleman's  name  is  Mr.  Tittlebat  Titmouse;  and  you'd 
better  take  care  what  you're  at,  old  •woman,  for  we've  come 
on  business  of  wital  consequence  !  " 

"  I  dare  say  it'll  keep,  then,  till  to-morrow,"  tartly  added 
the  old  woman. 

The  friends  consulted  for  a  moment,  and  then  Titmouse 
asked  if  he  might  go  in  and  write  a  letter  to  Messrs.  Quirk. 

"No  indeed!"  said  she;  "how  do  I  know  who  you  are? 
There's  a  public-house  close  by,  where  you  may  write  what 
you  like,  and  bring  it  here,  and  they'll  get  it  the  first  thing  in 
the  morning.  So  that's  what  you  may  take  away  with  you ! " 
— with  which  the  complaisant  old  janitrix  shut  the  door  in 
their  faces. 

"  Huck,  'pon  my  life,  I  am  afraid  there's  nothing  in  it,"  said 
Titmouse,  despondingly,  to  his  friend — both  of  them  remain- 
ing rooted  to  the  spot. 

"  Oudacious  old  toad ! "  muttered  Huckaback  indignantly. 

"  Hucky — I'm  sure  there's  nothing  in  it ! "  exclaimed  Tit- 
mouse after  a  long  pause,  looking  earnestly  at  his  friend, 
hoping  to  draw  from  him  a  contrary  opinion.  "  I— I  own  I 
don't  naif  like  the  looks  of  it,"  replied  Huckaback,  putting 
his  newspaper  into  his  pocket  again ;  "  but  we'll  try  if  we 
'  can't  write  a  letter  to  sound  'em,  and  so  far  take  the  old 
creature's  advice.  Here's  the  public-house  she  told  us  of. 
Come,  let's  see  what's  to  be  done." 

Titmouse, greatly  depressed, followed  his  friend;  and  they 
soon  provided  themselves  with  two  glasses  of  stout,  and 
after  a  little  difficulty,  with  implements  for  writing.  That 
they  made  good  use  of  their  time  and  materials,  let  the  fol- 
lowing epistle  prove.  It  was  their  joint  composition,  and 
here  is  an  exact  copy  of  it : 

"  To  Messrs.  QUIRK,  GAMMON,  and  SNAP. 
SIR, 
"  Your  Names  being  Put  In  an  Advertisement  in  This 


TEN  THOUSAND  A-TEAE.  29 

present  Sunday  Flash,  Newspaper  of  To-day's  Date,  Mr.  T. 
T.  Begs  To  inform  Your  respectable  House  I  feel  Uncommon 
anxious  To  speak  with  them  On  This  truly  interesting  sub- 
ject, seeing  It  mentions  The  Name  Of  Gabriel  Tittlebat  Tit- 
mouse, which  Two  last  Names  Of  That  Deceased  Person  my 
Own  Name  Is,  which  can  Any  Day  (As  soon  As  Possible) 
call  and  prove  To  you,  By  telling  you  The  Same,  truly.  He 
being  Engaged  in  Business  During  the  week  Very  close,  (for 
The  Present,)  I  hope  that  If  they  Have  Any  thing  particular 
To  say  To  Him,  they  will  write  To  me  without  The  least  De- 
lay, and  please  address  T.  T.  at  Tag-rag  and  Co.'s,  No.  375. 
Oxford  Street,  PostPaid,  which  will  ensure  Its  Being  duly 
Taken  In  By  my  Employers,  and  am, 
"  Gents, 

"  Yours  to  Command, 

"TITTLEBAT  TITMOUSE. 

"  P.  S.  My  friend,  that  Is  With  me  writing  This  (Mr. 
Robert  Huckaback,)  can  prove  who  I  am  If  necessitated  so 
to  do. 

"  N.B.  Shall  have  no  objections  to  do  the  Liberal  Thing 
if  anything  suitable  Turns  up  Of  It. 

"  T  T 

("  Sunday  Evening,  9/7/18— . 

"  Forgot  to  Say,  am  The  only  Child  of  my  Honored  Par- 
ents, one  of  which  (my  Mother)  Died ;  before  1  knew  them 
In  Lawful  Wedloc,  and  Was  27  last  Birth  Day,  Never  hav- 
ing Seen  your  Advertisement  Till  This  Night,  wh,  if  Neces- 
sary can  Prove") 

This  perspicu9us  and  truly  elegant  performance  having 
been  thrice  subjected  to  the  critical  examination  of  the 
friends,  (the  paragraph  concerning  Huckaback  having  been 
inserted  at  the  instance  of  that  gentleman,  who  wished  to 
be  mixed  up  from  the  beginning  with  so  promising  an  affair,) 
was  then  folded  up,  and  directed  to  "Messrs.  Quirk  and 
Co.,"  a  great  straggling  wet  wafer  having  been  first  put  upon 
it.  It  was  safely  deposited,  a  few  minutes  afterwards,  with 
the  old  woman  of  the  house  ;  and  then  the  two  West-End  gen- 
tlemen hastened  away  from  that  truly  plebeian  part  of  the 
town.  Under  three  different  gas-lights  did  they  stop,  take 
out  the  newspaper,  and  spell  over  the  advertisement ;  by 
which  ingenious  processes  they  at  length  succeeded  in  satis- 
fying themselves  that  there  was  something  in  it— a  fact  of 
which,  upon  the  old  woman  shutting  the  door  in  their  faces, 
it  may  be  recollected  they  had  had  grievous  misgivings. 
They  parted,  however,  with  a  considerable  abatement  of  the 
excitement  with  which  they  had  set  out  on  their  voyage  of 
discovery. 

Mr,  Titmouse  diet  not,  on  reaching  his  room,  take  off  and 


30  TEN  THOUSAND  A-TEAE. 

lay  aside  his  precious  Sunday  apparel  with  his  accustomed 
care  and  deliberation.  On  the  contrary,  he  peeled  it  off,  as 
it  were,  and  threw  himself  on  the  bed  as  quickly  as  possible 
in  order  that  he  might  calmly  revolve  the  immense  event  of 
the  day  in  his  mind,  which  it  had  agitated  like  a  stone 
thrown  into  a  stagnant  pool  by  the  roadside.  Oh,  how  rest- 
less was  he !  not  more  so  could  he  have  been  had  he  lain 
between  horse-hair  sheets.  He  repeatedly  got  up  and  walked 
about  two  or  three  little  steps,  which  were  all  that  his  room 
admitted  of.  At  the  very  first  peep  of  daylight  he  started 
out  of  bed,  got  out  of  his  pocket  the  newspaper  which  Huck- 
aback had  lent  him,  strove  to  decipher  the  advertisement, 
and  then  sunk  into  bed  again— but  not  to  sleep,  till  four  or 
five  o'clock ;  having  nevertheless  to  rise  at  half-past  six,  to 
resume  his  detested  duties  at  Tag-rag  and  Co.'s,  whose  shop 
he  assisted  in  opening  at  seven  o  clock,  as  usual.  When  he 
and  his  shopmates  were  sitting  together  at  breakfast,  he 
could  not  help  letting  out  a  little,  vaguely  and  mysteriously, 
about  "  something  that  might  happen  in  the  course  of  the 
day;"  and  thereby  succeeded  in  satisfying  his  experienced 
companions  that  he  expected  the  visit  of  a  policeman,  for 
some  row  he  had  been  concerned  in  over-night. — Well,  eight, 
nine,  ten  o'clock  wore  away  heavily,  and  nothing  transpired, 
alas !  to  vary  the  monotonous  duties  in  which  Mr.  Titmouse 
was  engaged ;  bale  after  bale,  and  package  after  package,  he 
t9ok  down  and  put  up  again,  at  the  bidding  of  pretty  capri- 
cious customers  ;  silk,  satin,  bombasins,  crapes,  muslins, 
ribbons,  gloyes,  he  assisted  in  displaying  and  disposing  of  as 
usual;  but  it  was  clear  that  his  powerful  understanding 
could  no  longer  settle  itself,  as  before,  upon  his  responsible 
and  arduous  duies.  Every  other  minute  he  cast  a  feverish 
furtive  glance  towards  the  door.  He  almost  dropped  at 
one  time,  as  a  postman  crossed  from  the  opposite  side  of 
the  street,  as  if  to  enter  their  shop — then  passing  on  im- 
mediately, however,  to  the  next  door.  Not  a  person,  in 
short,  entered  the  premises,  that  he  did  not  scrutinize  nar- 
rowly and  anxiously,  but  in  vain.  No— buying  and  selling 
was  the  order  of  the  day,  as  usual !— Eleven  o  clock  struck, 
and  he  sighed.  '  You  don't  seem  well,"  said  a  pretty 
young  women,  to  whom,  in  a  somewhat  absent  manner,  he 
was  exhibiting  and  describing  the  qualities  of  some  cambric. 
*'  Oh — ys — es,  uncommon ! "  he  replied ; "  never  better,  ma'am; 
than  when  so  well  employed !  *  accompanying  the  latter 
words  with  what  he  conceived  to  be  a  very  arch,  but  which 
was  in  fact,  a  very  impudent,  look  at  his  fair  customer.  At 
that  moment  a  voice  called  out  to  him  from  the  further  end 
of  the  shop,  near  the  door — "  Titmouse !  Wanted ! " 

"  Coming !  "  he  shouted,  turning  as  white  as  the  cambric 
he  held  in  his  hands — which  became  suddenly  cold,  while 
his  heart  went  thump,  thump,  as  he  hastily  exclaimed  to  the 
astonished  lady,  "  Excuse  me,  ma'am,  if  you  please — Jones," 


TEN  THOUSAND  A-TEAE.  31 

addressing  the  shopman  next  to  him, "  will  you  attend  to 
this  lady?"  and  he  hastened  whither  he  had  been  called, 
amidst  a  prevalent  grin  and  "  hem  ! "  from  his  companions 
on  each  side,  as  he  passed  along  the  shop,  till  he  reached  the 
spot  where  stood  the  stranger  who  haa  inquired  for  him. 
He  was  of  a  slight  gentlemanly  figure,  above  the  average 
height.  His  countenance  was  very  striking  :  he  was  dressed 
with  simplicity — somewhat  carelessly  perhaps ;  and  appeared 
somewhere  about  thirty-six  or  thirty-seven  years  of  age.  He 
bowed  slightly  as  Titmouse  approached  him,  and  an  air  of 
very  serious  surprise  came  over  his  expressive  countenance. 

"  Mr.  Titmouse  ?  "  he  inquired,  blandly. 

"  Ye-e-s,  sir,  at  your  service,"  replied  Titmouse,  trembling 
involuntarily  all  over.  The  stranger  again  slightly  inclined 
toward  him,  and — still  more  slightly — touched  his  hat ;  fix- 
ing on  him  at  the  same  time,  an  inquisitive  penetrating  eye, 
that  really  abashed,  or  rather  perhaps  alarmed  him. 

"  You  left — you  favored  us  by  leaving — a  note  at  our  office 
last  night,  addressed  to  Messrs.  Quirk,  Gammon,  and  Snap  ?  " 
he  inquired;  lowering  his  voice  to  a  whisper. 

"  Yes,  sir,  hoping  it  was  no 

"  Pray,  Mr.  Titmouse,  can  we  be  alone  for  about  five  or  ten 
minutes  ?  " 

"  I— I— don't  exactly  know,  here,  sir ;  I'm  afraid— against 
the  rules  of  the  house — but — I'll  ask.  Here  is  Mr.  Tag-rag. — 
May  I  step  into  the  cloak-room  with  this  gentleman  for  a  few 
minutes,  sir  ?  "  he  continued,  addressing  his  imperious  em- 

Eloyer,  who,  with  a  pen  behind  his  right  ear,  his  left  hand  in 
is  breeches  pocket,  and  his  right  hand  impatiently  tweed- 
ling  about  his  watch  seals,  had  followed  Titmouse,  on  hear- 
ing him  inquired  for  in  the  manner  I  have  described^  and 
stood  at  a  yard  or  two's  distance,  eying  the  two  with  a  fussy 
dissatisfied  look,  wondering  what  on  earth  any  one  could  want 
with  one  of  his  young  men. 

As  Mr.  Tag-rag  will  figure  a  little  on  my  canvas  by-and-by, 
I  may  as  well  here  give  the  reader  a  slight  sketch  of  that  gen- 
tleman. He  was  about  fifty-two  years  old ;  a  great  tyrant  in 
his  little  way ;  a  compound  of  ignorance,  selfishness,  and  con- 
ceit. He  knew  nothing  on  earth  except  the  price  of  his  goods, 
and  how  to  make  the  most  of  his  business.  He  was  of  mid- 
dle size,  with  a  tendency  to  corpulence  ;  and  almost  invari- 
ably wore  a  blaek  coat  and  waistcoat,  a  white  neck-handker- 
chief very  primly  tied,  and  gray  trousers.  He  had  a  dull, 
gray  eye,  with  white  eyelashes,  and  no  eyebrows ;  a  forehead 
that  seemed  ashamed  of  his  face,  it  retreated  so  far  and  so 
abruptly  back  from  it ;  his  face  was  pretty  deeply  pitted  with 
the  smallpox ;  his  nose— or  rather  semblance  of  a  nose— con- 
sisted of  two  great  nostrils  looking  at  you — as  it  were,  impu- 
dently—out of  the  middle  of  his  face ;  there  was  a  perfect 
level  space  from  cheekbone  to  cheekbone ;  his  whiskers, 
neatly  and  closely  cut,  came  in  points  to  each  corner  of  his 


32  TEN  THOUSAND  A-YEAR. 

mouth,  which  was  a  very  large,  shapeless,  sensual-looking 
affair.  This  may  serve,  tor  the  present,  to  give  you  an  idea 
of  the  man  who  had  contrived  to  excite  towards  himself  the 
hatred  and  contempt  of  everybody  over  whom  he  had  any 
control. 

"  You  know  quite  well,  sir,  we  never  allow  anything  of  the 
sort,"  was  his  short  reply,  in  a  very  disagreeable  tone  and 
manner,  to  the  modest  request  of  Titmouse,  as  above  men- ' 
tioned. 

"  May  I  beg  the  favor  of  a  few  minutes  private  conversa- 
tion with  Mr.  Titmouse,"  said  the  stranger,  politely,  "  on  a 
matter  of  the  last  importance  to  him  ?  '  My  name,  sir,  is  Gam- 
mon, and  I  am  a  solicitor." 

"  Why,  sir,"  answered  Tag-rag,  somewhat  cowed  by  the 
calm  and  gentlemanly,  but  at  the  same  tune  decisive  manner 
of  Mr.  Gammon — "  it's  really  very  inconvenient,  and  decided- 
ly against  the  rules  of  the  house,  for  any  of  my  ypung  men  to 
be  absent  on  business  of  their  own  during  my  business-hours ; 
but — I  suppose — what  must  be  must  be— Til  give  him  ten  min- 
utes—and he'd  better  not  stay  longer,"  he  subjoined  fiercely— 
looking  significantly  first  at  his  watch,  and  then  at  Titmouse. 
"  It's  only  for  the  sake  of  the  other  young  men,  sir.  In  a  large 
establishment  like  ours, we're  obliged,  you  know,  sir,"  etc.  etc. 
etc.,  he  added,  in  a  low  cringing  tone,  deprecatory  of  the  con- 
temptuous air  with  which  he  felt  that  Mr.  Gammon  was  re- 
garding him.  That  gentleman,  with  a  slight  bow,  and  a  sar- 
castic smile,  presently  quitted  the  shop,  accompanied  by  Tit- 
mouse, who  scarce  knew  whether  his  head  or  heels  were  up- 
permost. 

"  How  far  do  you  live  from  this  place,  Mr.  Titmouse  ?  "  in- 
quired Mr.  Gammon,  as  soon  as  they  had  got  into  the  street. 

"  Not  four  minutes'  walk,  sir ;  but — hem ! " — he  was  flus- 
tered at  the  idea  of  showing  so  eminent  a  person  into  his 
wretched  room—"  Suppose  we  were  to  step  into  this  tavern 
here,  sir— I  dare  say  they've  a  room  at  our  service " 

"Pray,  allow  me  to  ask,  Mr.  Titmouse, — have  you  any 
private  papers— family  writings,  or  things  of  that  sort,  at 
your  rooms?" 

Titmouse  seemed  considering. 

"  I— I  think  I  have,  sir,"  he  replied — "  one  or  two— but 
they're  of  no  consequence." 

"Are  you  a.  judge  on  that  point,  Mr.  Titmouse  ?"  inquired 
Mr.  Gammon,  with  a  smile ;  pray  let  us,  my  dear  sir,  at  once 
to  your  room— time  is  very  short  and  valuable.  I  should  vast- 
ly like  to  look  at  these  same  insignificant  papers  of  yours ! " 

In  less  than  two  minutes'  further  time,  Mr.  Gammon  was 
sitting  at  Titmouse's  little  rickety  round  table,  at  his  lodg- 
ings, with  a  sheet  of  paper  before  him,  and  a  small  pencil- 
case  in  his  hand,  asking  him  a  number  of  questions  concern- 
ing his  birth  and  family  connections,  and  taking  down  his 
answers  very  carefully.  Mr.  Titmouse  was  surprised  at  the 


TEN  THOUSAND  A-YEAR.  33 

gentleman's  knowledge  of  the  family  history  of  the  Tit- 
mouses.  As  for  papers,  etc.,  Mr.  Titmouse  succeeded  in  pro- 
ducing  four  or  five  old  letters  and  memoranda  from  the  bot- 
tom of  his  trunk,  and  9ne  or  two  entries,  in  faded  ink,  on  the 
fly-leaf  of  a  Bible  of  his  father's,  which  he  did  not  recollect 
having  opened  before  for  very  many  years,  and  of  which  said 
entries,  still  pressed  on  the  subject  by  Mr.  Gammon,  he  had 
been  hardly  aware  of  even  the  existence.  With  these  several 
documents  Mr.  Gammon  was  so  much  struck  that  he  pro- 
posed to  take  them  away  with  him,  for  better  and  more 
leisurely  examination,  and  safer  custody,  at  their  office  ;  but 
Mr.  Titmouse  significantly  hinted  at  his  very  recent  acquaint- 
ance with  Mr.  Gammon,  who,  he  intimated,  was  at  liberty  to 
come  and  make  exact  copies  of  them  whenever  he  pleased,  in 
his  (Mr.  Titmouse's)  presence. 

"  Oh,  certainly— yes,"  replied  Mr.  Gammon,  slightly  color- 
ing at  the  distrust  implied  by  this  observation  ;  "  I  applaud 
your  caution,  Mr.  Titmouse.  By  all  means  keep  them,  and 
most  carefully  ;  because,  (I  do  not  say  that  they  are),  but  it  is 
quite  possible  that  they  may  become  rather  valuable— to  you." 

"  Thank  you,  sir :  and  now,  hoping  you'll  excuse  the  liberty." 
said  Titmouse,  with  a  very  anxious  air,  "  I  should  most  un- 
commonly like  to  know  what  all  this  means — what  is  to  turn 
up  out  of  it  all?" 

"  The  law,  my  dear  sir,  is  proverbially  uncertain " 

"  Oh,  Lord  !  but  the  law  can  give  me  a  hint, — 

"  The  law  never  hints,  interrupted  Mr.  Gammon  impress- 
ively, with  a  bland  smile. 

"  Well  then,  how  did  you  come,  sir,  to  know  that  there 
ever  was  such  a  person  as  Mr.  Gabriel  Titmouse,  my  father  ? 
And  what  can  come  from  him,  seeing  he  was  only  a  bit  of  a 
shoemaker— unless  he's  heir  to  something  ?  " 

"  Ah,  yes— exactly ;  those  are  very  interesting  questions. 
Mr.  Titmouse— very ! " 

"  Yes,  sir ;  and  them  and  a  great  many  more  I  was  going 
to  ask  long  ago,  but  I  saw  you  were " 

"  Sir,  I  perceive  that  we  have  positively  been  absent  from 
your  place  of  business  nearly  an  hour — your  employers  will 
be  getting  rather  impatient." 

"  Meaning  no  ott'ence,  sir— bother  their  impatience  !  I'm 
impatient,  I  assure  you,  to  know  what  all  this  means.  Come, 
sir  'pon  my  life  I've  told  you  everything !  It  isn't  quite  fair !  " 

"  Why  certainly,  you  see,  Mr.  Titmouse,"  said  Gammon, 
with  an  agreeable  smile— (it  was  that  smile  of  his  that  had 
been  the  making  of  Mr.  Gammon)—"  it  is  only  candid  in  me 
to  acknowledge  that  your  curiosity  is  perfectly  reasonable, 
and  your  frankness  very  obliging  ;  and  I  see  no  difficulty  in 
admitting  at  once,  that  I  have  had  a  motive — 

"  Yes,  sir— and  all  that— I  know,  sir,"— hastily  interrupted 
Titmouse,  but  without  irritating  or  disturbing  the  placid 
speaker. 


84  TEN  THOUSAND  A-TEAE. 

"  And  that  we  waited  with  some  anxiety  for  the~result~bf 
our  advertisement." 

"Ah,  you  can't  escape  from  that,  you  know,  sir !  "  interpos- 
ed Titmouse,  with  a  confident  air. 

"But  it  is  a  maxim  with  us,  my  dear  sir,  never  to  be  pre- 
mature in  anything,  especially  when  it  may  be — very  preju- 
dicial ;  you've  really  no  idea,  my  dear  Mr.  Titmouse,  of  the 
world  of  mischief  that  is  often  done  by  precipitancy  in  legal 
matters ;  and  in  the  present  stage  of  the  business— the  present 
stage,  my  dear  sir— I  really  do  see  it  necessary  not  to — do 
anything  premature,  and  without  consulting  my  partners." 

"  Ijord,  sir !  "  exclaimed  Titmouse,  getting  more  and  more 
irritated  and  impatient  as  he  reflected  on  the  length  of  his 
absence  from  Tag-rap1  &  Go's. 

"  I  quite  feel  for  your  anxiety — so  perfectly  natural— 

"Oh.  Hpa.r  sir  'if  vniiYI  rmlv  tell  mp  thp  lcfi.st,  hit. " 


'  Oh,  dear  sir  !  if  you'd  only  tell  me  the  least  bit- 

"  If,  my  dear  sir,  I  were  to  disclose  just  now  the  exact  object 
we  had  in  inserting  that  advertisement  in  the  papers — 

"  How  did  you  come  to  know  of  it  at  all,  sir?  Come,  there 
can't  be  any  harm  in  that  anyhow— 

"  Not  the  least,  my  dear  sir.  It  was  in  the  course  of  busi- 
ness— in  the  course  of  business." 

"Is  it  money  that's  been  left  me— or— anything  of  that 
sort  ?  " 

It  quite  pains  me,  I  assure  you,  Mr.  Titmouse— I  think, 
by  the  way  "—added  Gammon  suddenly,  as  something  oc- 
curred to  him  of  their  previous  conversation,  which  he  was 
not  quite  sure  of—"  you  told  me  that  that  Bible  was  given 
you  by  your  father." 

"Oh  yes,  sir !  yes— no  doubt  of  it ;  surely  that  can't  signify, 
seeing  he's  dead,  and  I'm  his  only  son?"  asked  Titmouse, 
quickly  and  eagerly. 

"Oh,  'tis  only  a  circumstance— a  mere  circumstance  :  but 
in  business,  you  know,  Mr.  Titmouse,  every  little  helps— and 
Y°u  really,  by  the  way,  have  no  recollection  of  your  mother, 
Mr.  Titmouse  »' " 

•* Naur,  I  said  so !  And— meaning  no  offence,  sir— I  can't 
abide  being  put  off  in  this  kind  of  way,— I  must  own!— See 
what  1  have  told  you— you've  told  me  nothing  at  all.  I  hope 
you  haven't  been  only  making  me  a  cat's-paw  of  ?  Ton  my 
soul^l  hate  being  made  a  cat's-paw  of,  sir !  " 

'  Good  heavens,  Mr.  Titmouse!  how  can  you  imagine  it? 
You  are  at  this  moment  the  object  of  a  considerable  share 
ol  our  anxiety 

T^£££$&&  Ji  ™kly,  sir-please  to  tell  me  at  once. 
P  «  TI£ t  ™  6  the  bettf  r  f or  anything  you're  now  about  ?  '* 
That  may  or  may  not  be,  sir,"  answered  Mr.  Gammon, 
in  the  same  imperturbable  manner,  drawing  on  his  gloves 
and  rising  from  his  chair.  "  In  justice  to  yourself  and  other 
parties  concerned " 


TEN  THOUSAND  A-YEAtt.  35 

"Oh!  is~  anybody  to  share  in  it?"  exclaim wl  Titmouse, 
alarmedly. 

'•  I  am  sure,"  said  Gammon,  smiling,  "  that  you  will  give 
us  credit  for  consulting  your  best  interests.  We  sincerely 
desire  to  advance  them  ;  and  this  matter  occupies  a  good 
deal  of  our  time  and  anxiety.  It — it  is  really"  looking  at  his 
watch,  "  upwards  of  an  hour  since  we  quitted  your  plg.ce  of 
business— I  fear  I  shall  get  into  disgrace  with  that  respecta- 
ble gentleman  your  employer.  Will  you  favor  us  with  a  call 
at  our  office  to-morrow  night,  when  the  business  of  the  day 
is  over ?  When  do  you  quit  ut  night  ?  " 

"  About  half-past  nine  o'clock,  sir  ;  but  really— to-morrow 
night !  Couldn't  I  come  to-night,  sir  ?  " 

"  Not  to-night,  I  fear,  my  dear  sir.  We  have  a  very  impor- 
tant engagement.  Let  us  say  to-morrow  night,  at  a  quarter 
past  ten— shall  we  say  that  hour  ?  " 

"  Well,  sir,  if  not  before — yes— I'll  be  with  you.  But  I 
must  say " 

"  Good-day,  Mr.  Titmouse."  They  were  by  this  time  in  Ox- 
ford Street  again.  "Good-day,  my  dear  sir— good-day — to- 
morrow night,  as  soon  after  ten  as  possible — eh  ?  Good-by." 

This  was  all  that  Mr.  Titmouse  could  get  out  of  Mr.  Gam- 
mon, who,  hailing  a  coach  off  the  stand  beside  them,  got  into 
it,  and  it  was  soon  making  its  way  eastward.  What  a  misera- 
ble mixture  of  doubts,  hopes,  and  fears,  had  he  left  Titmouse ! 
He  felt  as  if  he  were  like  a  squeezed  orange  ;  he  had  told 
eve^thing  he  knew  about  himself,  and  got  nothing  in  return 
out  of  the  smooth,  imperturbable,  impenetrable  Mr.  Gammon, 
but  empty  civilities. — "  Lord,  Lord !  "  thought  Titmouse,  as 
Mr.  Gammon's  coach  turned  the  corner :  "  what  would  I  give 
to  know  half  about  it  that  that  gent  knows !  But  Mr.  Tag- 
rag  !  by  Jove !  what  will  he  say  ?  It's  struck  twelve.  I've 
been  more  than  an  hour  away— and  he  gave  me  ten  minutes ! 
Sh'an'tl  catch  it?" 

And  he  did.  Almost  the  very  first  person  he  met,  on  enter- 
ing the  shop,  was  his  respected  employer,  Mr.  Tagrag,  who 
plucking  his  watch  out  of  his  fob,  and,  looking  furiously  at 
it,  motioned  the  trembling  Titmouse  to  follow  him  to  the 
further  end  of  the  long  ^hop,  where  there  happened  to  be 
then  no  customer  . 

"  Is  this  :Tour  J;en  minutes,  sir,  eh  ?  " 

"  I  am  sorry " 

"  Wher :  may  vou  have  been,  sir,  all  this  while  ?  " 

"  With  that  gentleman,  sir,  and  I  really  did  not  know '• 

"  You  didn't  know,  sir !    Who  cares  what  you  know,  or 

five 
erty, 

of  the  day !  I've  not  had  su3h  a  thing  happen  this  five  years ! 
I'll  stop  it  out  of  your  salary,  sir." 
Titmouse  did  not  attempt  to  interrupt  him. 


36  TEN  THOUSAND  A-YEAR. 

"  And  pray  what  have  you  been  gossiping  about,  sir,  in  this 
disgraceful  manner  ?  " 

"  Something  that  he  wanted  to  say  to  me,  sir. 

"  You  low  puppy !— do  you  suppose  I  don  t  see  y9ur  imper- 
tinence ?  I  insist,  sir,  on  knowing  what  all  this  gossiping  with 
that  fellow  has  been  about  ?  " 

"Then  you  won't  know,  that's  flat!"  replied  Titmouse 
doggedly :  returning  to  his  usual  station  behind  the  counter. 

*1  sha'n't!!" 

"  No,  sir,  you  sha'n't  know  a  single  word  about  it. 

"  Sha'n't  know  a  single  word  about  it !  Vastly  good,  sir !  !— 
Do  you  know  whom  you're  talking  to,  sir  ?  Do  you  really 
know  in  whose  presence  you  are,  sir ! " 

"  Mr.  Tag-rag,  I  presume,  of  the  firm  of  Tag-rag  and  Co., 
replied  Titmouse,  looking  him  full  in  the  face.— One  or  two 
of  nis  companions  near  him,  almost  turned  pale  at  the  au- 
dacity he  was  displaying. 

"  And  who  are  you,  sir,  that  dare  to  presume  to  bandy 
words  with  ME,  sir  ?  "  enquired  Tag-rag,  his  deeply  pitted  face 
having  gone  quite  white,  and  his  whole  body  quivering  with 
rage. 

"  Tittlebat  Titmouse,  at  your  service,"  was  the  answer  in 
a  glib  tone,  and  with  a  sufficiently  saucy  air. 

-  You  heard  that,  I  hope  ?  "  inquired  Tag-rag,  with  forced 
calmness,  of  a  pale-faced  young  man,  the  nearest  to  him. 

"  Ye— es,  sir,    was  the  meekly  reluctant  answer. 

"  This  day  month  you  leave,  sir ! "  said  Mr.  Tag-rag 
solemnly— as  if  conscious  that  he  was  passing  a  sort  of  sen- 
tence of  death  upon  the  presumptuous  delinquent. 

"  Very  well,  Mr.  Tag-rag  —  anything  that  pleases  you 
pleases  your  humble  servant.  I  will  go  this  day  month,  and 
welcome — I've  long  wished — 

i4  Then  you  shtfn't  leave,  sir,"  said  Tag-rag,  furiously. 

"  But  I  will,  sir.  You've  given  me  warning  ;  and  if  you 
haven't,  now  I  give  you  warning,"  replied  Titmouse ;  turn- 
ing, however,  very  pale,  and  experiencing  a  certain  sudden 
sinking  of  the  heart— for  this  was  a  seri9us  and  most  unlook- 
ed-for event,  and  for  a  while  put  out  of  his  head  all  the  agitat- 
ing thoughts  of  the  last  few  hours.  Poor  Titmouse  had 
enough  to  bear — what  with  the  delicate  raillery  and  banter  of 
his  accomplished  companions  for  the  rest  of  the  day,  and  the 

galling  tyranny  of  Mr.  Tag-rag,  (who  dogged  him  about  all 
ay,  setting  him  about  the  most  menial  and  troublesome 
offices  he  could,  and  constantly  saying  mortifying  things  to 
him  before  customers,)  and  the  state  of  miserable  suspense 
in  which  Mr.  Gammon  had  though  fit  to  leave  him ;  I  say 
that  surely  all  this  was  enough  for  him  to  bear  without  hav- 
ing to  encounter  at  night,  as  he  did,  on  his  return  to  his  lodg- 
ings, his  blustering  landlady,  who  vowed  that  if  she  sold  him 
out  and  out  she  would  be  put  off  no  longer— and  his 
pertinacious  and  melancholy  tailor,  who,  with  sallow  un- 


TEN  THOUSAND  A-YEAR.  37 

shaven  face,  told  him  of  five  children  at  home,  all  ill  of  the 
small-pox,  and  his  wife  in  an  hospital — and  he  implored  a 
payment  on  account.  This  sufferer  succeeded  in  squeezing  out 
of  Titmouse  seven  shillings  on  account,  and  his  landlady  ex- 
torted ten  ;  which  staved  off  a  distress— direful  word  ! — for 
some  week  or  two  longer  ;  and  so  they  left  him  in  the  posses- 
sion of  eight  shillings  or  so,  to  last  till  next  quarter-day.  Pie 
sighed  heavily,  barred  his  door,  and  sat  down  opposite  his 
little  table,  on  which  was  nothing  but  a  solitary  thin  candle, 
and  on  which  his  eyes  rested  unconsciously,  till  the  stench 
of  it,  burning  right  "down  into  the  socket,  roused  him  from 
his  wretched  reverie.  Then  he  unlocked  his  box,  and  took 
out  his  Bible  and  the  papers  which  had  been  produced  to  Mr. 
Gammon,  and  gazed  at  them  with  intense  but  useless  scrutiny. 
Unable,  however,  to  conjecture  what  bearing  they  could  have 
upon  himself  or  his  fortunes,  he  hastily  replaced  them  in  his 
box,  threw  off  his  clothes,  and  flung  himself  on  his  bed,  to 
pass  a  far  more  dismal  night  than  he  had  known  for  years. 

He  ran  the  gauntlet  at  Messrs.  Tag-rag  and  Co.'s  all 
Tuesday  as  he  had  done  on  the  day  preceding.  One  should 
have  supposed  that  when  his  companions  beheld  him 
persecuted  by  their  common  tyrant,  whom  they  all  equally 
hated,  they  would  have  made  common  cause  with  their  suffer- 
ing companion,  or  at  all  events  given  no  countenance  to  his 
persecution ;  yet  it  was  far  otherwise.  Without  stopping  to 
analyze  the  feeling  which  produced  it,  (and  which  the 
moderately  reflective  reader  may  easily  analyze  for  himself 
if  so  disposed,)  I  am  grieved  to  have  to  say,  that  when  all  the 
young  men  saw  that  Tag-rag  would  be  gratified  by  their 
cutting  poor  Titmouse,  who,  with  all  his  little  vanities, 
fooleries,  and  even  selfishness,  had  never  personally  of- 
fended or  injured  any  of  them— they  did  so ;  and  when  Tag- 
rag  observed  it,  his  miserable  mind  was  more  gratified  with 
them  by  far  than  it  had  ever  been  before.  He  spoke  to  all  of 
them  with  unusual  blandness;  to  the  sinner,  Titmouse, 
with  augmented  bitterness. 


CHAPTER  H. 

A  FEW  minutes  after  ten  o'clock  that  night,  a  gentle  ring- 
ing  at  the  bell  of  Messrs.  Quirk,  Gammon,  and  Snap's  office, 
announced  the  arrival  of  poor  Titmouse.  The  door  was 
quickly  opened  by  a  very  fashionably  dressed  clerk,  who 
seemed  in  the  act  of  quitting  for  the  night. 

"  Ah — Mr.  Titmouse,  I  presume  ?  "  he  inquired,  with  a  kind 
of  deference  in  his  manner  that  Titmouse  had  never  been 
accustomed  to. 

"  The  same,  sir— Tittlebat  Titmouse." 

*'  Oh  !  allow  me,  sir,  to  show  you  in  to  Messrs.  Quirk,  Gam* 


38  TEN  THOUSAND  A-TEAR. 

mon,  and  Snap.  I  know  they're  expecting  to  see  you.  It's 
not  often  they're  here  so  late  !  Walk  in,  sir —  With  this 
he  led  the  way  to  an  inner  room,  and  opening  a  green-baize 
door  in  the  further  side  of  it,  announced  and  showed  in  Mr. 
Titmouse,  and  left  him — sufficiently  flustered.  Three  gentle- 
men were  sitting  at  a  large  table,  on  which  he  saw,  by  the 
strong  but  circumscribed  light  of  two  shaded  candlesticks, 
were  lying  a  great  number  of  papers  and  parchments.  The 
three  gentlemen  rose  when  he  entered,  Mr.  Quirk  and  Mr. 
Snap  involuntarily  starting  on  first  catching  sight  of  the 
figure  of  Titmouse ;  Mr.  Gammon  came  and  shook  hands  with 
him. 

"  Mr.  Titmouse,"  said  he,  with  a  very  polite  air,  "  let  me 
Introduce  you  to  Mr.  Quirk  " — (This  was  the  senior  partner, 
a  short,  stout,  elderly  gentleman,  dressed  in  black,  with  a 
shining  bald  head  and  white  hair,  and  sharp  black  eyes,  and 
who  looked  very  earnestly,  nay,  with  even  a  kind  of  dismay, 
at  him) — '  and  Mr.  Snap  " — (This  was  the  junior  partner, 
having  recently  been  promoted  to  be  such  after  ten  years' 
service  in  the  office,  as  managing  clerk ;  he  was  about  thirty, 
particularly  well  dressed,  slight,  active,  and  with  a  face  like 
a  terrier— so  hard,  sharp,  and  wiry  !)  Of  Mr.  Gammon  him- 
self, I  have  alread}r  given  the  reader  a  slight  notion,  He  ap- 
peared altogether  a  different  style  of  person  from  both  his 
partners.  He  was  of  most  gentlemanly  person  and  bearing 
— and  at  once  acute,  cautious,  and  insinuating— with  a  certain 
something  about  the  eye,  which  had  from  the  first  made 
Titmouse  feel  uneasy  on  looking  at  him, 

"  A  seat,  sir,"  said  Mr.  Quirk,  rising,  and  placing  a  chair 
for  him,  on  which  he  sat  down,  they  resuming  theirs. 

'  You  are  punctual,  Mr-  Titmouse!  "  exclaimed  Mr.  Gam- 
mon, with  a  smile;  "  more  so  than,  I  fear,  you  were  yester- 
day, after  our  long  interview,  en?  Pray  what  did  that 
worthy  person,  Mr.  Rag-bag— or  whatever  his  name  is— say, 
on  your  return  ?  " 

"  Say,  gents  ?  "  he  tried  to  clear  his  throat,  for  he  spoke 
somewhat  more  thickly,  and  his  heart  beat  more  perceptibly 
than  usual)—"  Meaning  no  offence— I'm  ruined  by  it,  and  no 
mistake." 

"  Ruined !  I'm  sorry  to  hear  it,"  interposed  Mr.  Gammon, 
with  a  concerned  air. 

"  I  am,  indeed,  sir.  Such  a  towering  rage  as  he  has  been  in 
ever  since ;  and  he's  given  me  warning  to  go  on  the  10th  of 
next  month."  He  thought  he  observed  a  faint  smile  flit  over 
the  faces  of  all  three.  'T  He  has,  indeed !  " 

"Dear  me,  Mr.  Titmouse !— Did  he  allege  any  reason  for 
dismissing  you?"  keenly  inquired  Mr.  Quirk. 

''  Yes,  sir — 

"  What  might  it  have  been  ?  " 

"  Stopping  out  longer  than  I  was  allowed,  and  refusing  to 
him  what  this  gentleman  and  I  had  been  talking  about," 


TEN  THOUSAND  A-YEAE.  39 

"  Don't  think  that'll  do ;  sure  it  won't !  "  briskly  exclaim- 
ed Mr.  Snap ;  "  no  just  cause,  that,"  and  he  jumped  up, 
whisked  down  a  book  from  the  shelves  behind  him,  ana 
eagerly  turned  over  the  leaves. 

"  Never  mind  that  now,  Mr.  Snap,"  said  Mr.  Quirk,  rather 
petulantly ;  "  surely  we  have  other  matters  to  talk  about  to- 
night." 

"  Asking  pardon,  sir,  but  I  think  it  does  matter  to  me,  sir," 
interposed  Titmouse .  "  for  on  the  10th  of  next  month  I'm  a 
beggar— being  next  door  to  it  now." 

"  Not  quite,  we  trust,"  said  Mr.  Gammon,  with  a  benignant 
smile. 

"  But  Mr.  Tag-rag  said  he'd  make  me  as  good  as  one." 

"  That's  evidence  to  show  malice,"  again  eagerly  interject- 
ed Mr.  Snap,  who  was  again  tartly  rebuffed  by  Mr.  Quirk  ; 
even  Mr.  Gammon  turning  towards  him  with  a  surprised— 
"  Really,  Mr.  Snap  !  " 

"  So  Mr.  Tag-rag  said  he'd  make  you  a  beggar?"  inquired 
Mr.  Quirk. 

"  He  vowed  he  would,  sir !— He  did,  as  true  as  the  gospel, 
sir  ! " 

"  Ha,  ha,  ha ! "  laughed  Mr.  Quirk  and  Mr.  Gammon— but 


the  soft  laugh  of  Mr.  Gammon,  and  a  kind  of  sharp  quick 
sound,  like  a  bark,  from  Mr.  Snap. 

"  But,  gents,  you'll  excuse  me  if  I  say  I  think  it  does 
signify  to  me,  and  a'n't  any  laughing  matter !  "  quoth  Tit- 
mouse earnestly,  and  coloring  with  anger.  "  Without  being 
rude,  I'd  rather  come  t9  business,  if  there's  any  to  be  done, 
without  so  much  laughing  at  me." 

"  Laughing  at  you !  my  dear  sir, — no,  no  ! "  exclaimed  all 
three  in  a  breath — "laughing  withjou,"  said  Mr.  Quirk!  — 
"  By  the  time  you  mention  you  may  perhaps  be  able  to  laugh 

at  Mr.  Rag-bag,  and  everybody  else,  for " 

[ — '  No  use  mincing  matters  ?  '  he  whispered,  in  a  low  tone, 
to  Mr.  Gammon,  who  nodded  in  apparently  reluctant  ac- 
quiescence, and  fixed  his  eyes  earnestly  on  Titmouse.] 

"  I  really  think  we  are  warranted^  sir,  in  preparing  you  to 
expect  by  that  time— that  is,  you  will  understand,  sir,  if  our 
efforts  are  successful  in  your  behalf,  and  if  you  yield  yourself 
implicitly  in  all  things  to  our  guidance— that  is  absoluely  essen- 
tial—a, prospect— we  say,  at  present,  you  will  observe,  only  a 
prospect — of  a  surprising  and  splendid  change  in  your  circum- 
stances !  "  Titmouse  began  to  tremble  violently,  his  heart  beat 
rapidly,  and  his  hands  were  bedewed  with  a  cold  moisture. 

"  I  hear,  gents,"  said  he,  thickly ;  and  he  also  heard  a  faint 
ringing  in  his  ears. 

"It's  not  impossible,  sir,  in  plain  English,"  continued  Mr. 
Quirk?  himself  growing  a  little  excited  with  the  important 


40  TEN  THOUSAND  A-YEAB. 

communication  that  trembled  on  the  tip  of  his  tongue,  "  that 
you  may  at  no  distant  time  (if  you  turn  out  to  be  the  person) 
be  put  into  possession  of  an  estate  of  somewhere  about  Ten 
Thousand  a-year " 

The  words  seemed  to  have  struck  Titmouse  blind— as  he 
saw  nothing  for  some  moments ;  then  everything  seemed 
swimming  around  him,  and  he  felt  a  sort  of  faintness  or 
sickness  stealing  over  him.  They  had  hardly  been  prepared 
for  their  communications  affecting  their  little  visitor  so 
powerfully.  Mr.  Snap  hastened  out,  and  in  with  a  glass  of 
water  ;  and  the  earnest  attentions  of  the  three  soon  restored 
Mr.  Titmouse  to  his  senses.  It  was  a  good  while,  however, 
before  he  could  appreciate  the  little  conversation  which  they 
now  and  then  addressed  to  him,  or  estimate  the  full  impor- 
tance of  the  astounding  intelligence  Mr.  Quirk  had  just  com- 
municated, "  Beg  pardon — but  may  I  make  free  to  ask  for  a 
little  brandy  and  water,  gents  ?  I  feel  all  over  in  a  kind  of 
tremble,"  said  he,  some  time  afterwards. 

"  Yes— by  all  means,  Mr.  Titmouse.  Mr.  Snap,  will  you  be 
kind  enough  to  order  Betty  to  bring  in  a  glass  of  cold  brandy 
and  water  from  the  Jolly  Thieves,  next  door  ?  " — Snap  shot 
out,  gave  the  order,  and  returned  in  a  trice.  The  old  woman 
in  a  few  minutes'  time  followed,  with  a  large  tumbler  of  dark 
brandy  and  water,  quite  hot,  for  which  Mr.  Gammon  apolo- 
gized, but  Mr.  Titmouse  said  he  preferred  it  so — and  soon 
addressed  himself  to  the  inspiring  mixture.  It  quickly 
manifested  its  influence,  reassuring  him  wonderfully.  As 
he  sat  sipping  it,  Messrs.  Quirk,  Gammon,  and  Snap  being 
engaged  in  an  earnest  conversation,  of  which  he  could  under- 
stand little  or  nothing,  he  had  leisure  to  look  about  him,  and 
observed  that  there  was  lying  before  them  a  large  sheet  of 
paper,  of  which  they  all  of  them  often  and  earnestly  looked, 
filled  with  marks,  so — 


with  writing  at  the  ends  of  each  of  them,  and  round  and 
square  figures.  When  he  saw  them  all  bending  over  and 
scrutinizing  this  mysterious  object,  it  puzzled  him  (and  many 
a  better  head  than  his  has  a  pedigree  puzzled  before)  sorely, 
and  he  began  to  suspect  it  was  a  sort  of  conjuring  paper  !— 

1  hope,  gents,  that  paper's  all  right— eh  ?  "  said  he,  sup. 

ported  by  the  brandy,  which  he  had  nearly  finished.    They 

irned  towards  him  with  a  smile  of  momentary  surprise,  and 


TEN  THOUSAND  A-YEAR.  41 

"  We  hope  so— a  vast  deal  depends  on  it,"  said  Mr.  Quirk, 
looking  over  his  glasses,  at  Titmouse.  Now  what  he  haa 
hinted  at,  as  far  as  he  could  venture  to  do  so,  was  a  thought 
that  glanced  across  his  as  yet  unsettled  brain,  that  there 
might  have  been  invoked  more  than  mere  earthly  assistance; 
but  he  prudently  pressed  the  matter  no  farther— that  was  all 
Messrs.  Quirk,  Gammon,  and  Snap's  look  out ;  he  had.  been 
no  party  to  anything  of  the  sort,  nor  would  he  knowingly. 
He  also  observed  the  same  sheets  of  paper  written  all  over, 
which  Mr.  Gammon  had  filled  at  his  (Titmouse's)  room,  the 
night  before  ;  and  several  new,  and  old-looking,  papers  and 
parchments.  Sometimes  they  addressed  questions  to  him, 
but  found  it  somewhat  difficult  to  keep  his  attention  up  to 
anything  that  was  said  to  him  for  the  wild  visions  that  were 
chasing  one  another  through  his  heated  brain  ;  the  passage 
of  which  said  visions  was  not  a  little  accelerated  by  the 
large  tumbler  of  brandy  and  water  which  he  had  just 
taken. 

"  Then,  in  fact,"  said  Mr.  Quirk,  as  the  three  simultane- 
ously sat  down,  after  having  been  for  some  time  standing 
poring  over  the  paper  before  Mr.  Quirk,  "  Tittlebat's  title  ac- 
crued in  18—?  That's  the  point — eh,  Gammon  ?" 

"Precisely  so,"  said  Mr.  Gammon  calmly. 

"  To  be  sure,"  confidently  added  Snap ;  who  having  devoted 
himself  exclusively  all  his  life  to  the  sharpest  practice  of  the 
criminal  law,  knew  about  as  much  of  real  property  law  as  a 
snipe — but  it  would  not  do  to  appear  ignorant,  or  taking  no 
part  in  the  matter,  in  the  presence  of  the  heir-at-law,  and 
the  future  great  client  of  the  House. 

"  Well,  Mr.  Titmouse,"  at  length  said  Mr.  Quirk,  laying 
aside  his  glasses — "  you  are  likely  to  be  one  of  the  luckiest 
men  of  your  day !  We  may  be  mistaken,  but  it  appears  to  us 
that  your  right  is  clear,  and  has  been  clear  these  ten  or  twelve 
years,  to  the  immediate  enjoyment  of  a  very  fine  estate  in 
Yorkshire,  worth  some  ,£10,000  or  £12,000  a-year  at  the 
least ! " 

"  You  don't  say  so  !  Oh,  gents !  I  do  believe  we're  all 
dreaming  !  Is  it  all  true,  indeed  ?  " 

"  It  is,  Mr.  Titmouse — and  we  are  very  proud  and  happy 
indeed  to  be  the  honored  instruments  of  establishing  your 
rights,  iny  dear  sir,"  said  Mr.  Gammon. 

"  Then  all  the  money  that's  been  spent  this  ten  or  twelve 
years  is  my  money,  is  it  ?  " 

"  If  we  are  right  it  is  undoubtedly  as  you  say,"  answered 
Mr.  Quirk,  giving  a  quick  apprehensive  glance  at  Mr.  Gam- 
mon. 

"  There'll  be  a  jolly  reckoning  for  some  one,  then,  shortly 
—eh?  My  stars!" 

"  My  dear  Mr.  Titmouse,"  said  Mr.  Gammon,  "  you  have  a 
most  just  regard  for  your  own  interests  ;  there  will  be  a 
reckoning,  and  a  very  terrible  one  ere  long,  for  somebody— 


42  TEN  THOUSAND  A-YEAE. 

but  we've  time  enough  before  us  for  all  that !  Only  let  us 
have  the  unspeakable  happiness  of  seeing  you  once  fairly  in 
possession  of  your  estates,  and  our  office  shall  know  no  rest 
till  you  have  got  ail  you  are  ^entitled  to— every  farthing 
even  ! " 

"  Oh,  never  fear  our  letting  them  rest !  "  said  Mr.  Quirk, 
judiciously  accommodating  himself  to  the  taste  and  appre- 
hension of  his  excited  auditor— "  Those  that  must  give  up 
the  goose  must  give  up  the  giblets  also — ha,  ha,  ha !  '  Mesers. 
Gammon  and  Snap  echoed  the  laugh,  and  enjoyed  the  joke 
of  the  head  of  the  firm.  "  Ha,  ha,  ha  !  "  laughed  Mr.  Tit- 
mouse, immensely  excited  by  the  conjoint  influence  of 
the  brandy  and  the  news  of  the  night ;  "  capital !  capital ! 
hurrah  !  Such  goings  on  there  will  be  !  You're  all  of  the 
right  sort ,  gents,  I  see  !  Ton  my  life,  law  for  ever  !  Let's 
all  shake  hands,  gents  !  Come,  if  you  please,  all  together  ! 
all  friends  to-night ! "  And  the  little  fellow  grasped  each  of 
the  three  readily-proffered  right  hands  of  Messrs.  Quirk, 
Gammon,  and  Snap,  with  an  energy  that  was  likely  to  make 
all  the  high  contracting  parties  to  that  quadruple  alliance 
remember  its  ratification. 

"  And  is  it  all  a  ready-money  affair,  gents — or  rent,  and  all 
that  kind  of  thing  ?  " 

"  Why,  almost  entirely  the  latter,"  answered  Mr.  Quirk, 
*'  except  the  accumulations." 

"  Then,  'pon  my  soul — I'm  a  great  landlord,  am  I  ?" 

"  Indeed,  my  dear  Mr.  Titmouse,  you  are — (that  is,  unless 
we  have  made  a  blunder  such  as  our  house  is  not  often  in  the 
Kabit  of  making)— and  have  two  very  fine  houses,  one  in  town 
and  the  other  in  the  country." 

"  Capital !  delightful !  I'll  live  in  both  of  them— we'll 
have  such  goings  on  !  And  is  it,  quite  up  to  the  mark  of 
£10,000  a-year  ?  " 

"  We  really  entertain  no  doubt " 

"  And  such  as  I  can  spend  all  of  it,  every  year  ?" 

"  Certainly — no  doubt  of  it — not  the  least.  The  rents  are 
paid  with  most  exemplary  punctuality — at  least,"  added  Mr. 
Gammon,  with  a  captivating  and  irresistible  smile,  and  taking 
him  affectionately  by  the  hand—"  at  least  they  will  be,  as  soon 
as  we  have  them  fairly  in  9ur  management. 

"  Oh,  you're  to  get  it  all  in  for  me,  are  you  ?  "  he  inquired 
briskly.  The  three  partners  bowed,  with  the  most  deprecat- 
iugly  disinterested  air  in  the  world,  intimating  that,  lor  his 
sake,  they  were  ready  to  take  upon  themselves  even  that 
troublesome  responsibility. 

"  Capital !  couldn't  be  better  !  couldn't  be  better !  Ah,  ha, 
ha— you've  catched  the  goose,  and  must  bring  me  its  eggs. 
Ah,  ha,  ha !  a  touch  in  your  line,  old  gent !  " 

"  Ha,  ha,  ha !  excellent !  ah,  ha,  ha  ! "  laughed  the  three  part- 
ners at  the  wit  of  their  new  client.  Mr.  Titmouse  joined 
them,  and  snapped  his  fingers  in  the  air. 


TEN  THOUSAND  A-TEAE.  4S 

""Lord— I've  just  thought  of  Tag-rag  and  Company's--! 
seem  as  if  I  hadn't  seen  or  heard  of  those  gents  for  Lord  knows 
how  long !  Only  fancy  old  Tag-rag  making  me  a  beggar  on 
the  10th  of  next  month — ha,  ha,  ha  ! — I  sha'n't  see  that  infer- 
nal hole  any  more,  anyhow !  " 

[ "  There  !  "  whispered  Mr.  Gammon,  apprehensively,  in 
the  ear  of  Mr.  Quirk,  "  you  hear  that  ?  A  little  wretch !  We 
have  been  perfectly  insane  in  going  so  far  already  with  him ! 
Is  not  this  what  I  predicted?"  "I  don't  care,"  said  Mr. 
Quirk  stubbornly.  "  Who  first  found  it  out,  Mr.  Gammon  ? 
and  who's  to  be  at  the  expense  and  responsibility  ?  Pshaw ! 
I  know  what  I'm  about— I'll  make  him  knuckle  down— never 
fear  me!"] 

"  That"  snapping  his  fingers,  "  for  Mr.  Tag-rag !  That 
for  Mother  Squallop— Ah,  ha,  gents !  It  won't  do  to  go  back 
to  that— eugh  ! — eh  ?  will  it  ?— you  know  what  I  mean !  Fan- 
cy Tittlebat  Titmouse  standing  behind 

The  partners  looked  rather  blank. 

"We  would  venture  to  suggest,  Mr.  Titmouse,"  said  Mr. 
Gammon  seriously,  "  the  absolute  necessity  there  is  for  every- 
thing on  your  part  and  our  parts  to  go  on  as  quietly  as  before, 
for  a  little  time  to  come :  to  be  safe  and  successful,  my  dear 
sir,  we  must  be  secret.'''' 

"  Oh,  I  see,  gents  !  I  see  5  mum — mum's  the  word,  for  the 
present !  But,  I  must  say,  if  there  is  any  one  whom  I  want 
to  hear  of  it,  sooner  than  another,  it's — 

"  Rag-bag  and  Co.,  I  suppose !  ha,  ha,  ha ! "  interrupted  Mr. 
Gammon,  his  partners  echoing  his  gentle  laugh. 

"  Ha,  ha,  ha!  Cuss  the  cats— that's  it — ha,  ha,  ha !  "  echoed 
Mr.  Titmouse ;  who,  getting  up  out  of  his  chair,  could  not  re- 
sist capering  to  and  fro  in  something  of  the  attitude  of  a 
stage-dancer,  whistling  and  humming  by  turns,  and  indulg- 
ing in  various  other  wild  antics. 

"  And  now,  gents — excuse  me,  but,  to  do  a  bit  of  business 
— when  am  I  to  begin  scattering  the  shiners,  eh  ?  "  he  inquired, 
interrupting  a  low-toned,  but  somewhat  vehement  conversa- 
tion, between  the  two  senior  partners. 

"  Oh,  of  course,  sir,"  replied  Mr.  Gammon,  rather  coldly, 
"  some  delay  is  unavoidable.  All  we  have  done,  as  yet,  is  to 
discover  that,  as  far  as  we  are  advised,  and  can  judge,  you 
will  turn  out  to  be  the  right  owner ;  but  very  extensive  and 
expensive  operations  must  be  immediately  commenced,  be- 
fore you  can  be  put  into  possession.  There  are  some  who 
won't  be  persuaded  to  drop  £10,000  a  year  out  of  their  hands, 
Mr.  Titmouse,  for  the  mere  asking !  "  added  Mr.  Gammon 
with  a  bitter  smile. 

"  The  devil  there  are !  Who  are  they  that  want  to  keep 
me  any  longer  out  of  what's  my  own? — what's  justly  mine? 
Eh  ?  I  want  to  know !  Haven't  they  kept  me  out  long  enough  ? 
—hang  'em  !  Put  'em  in  prison  directly — don't  spare  'em — 
rascals ! " 


44  TEN  THOUSAND  A-YEAB. 

"  They'll  probably,  erelong,  find  their  way  in  that  direction 
—for,  however,"  replied  Mr.  Quirk,  "  he's  to  make  up,  poor 
devil,  the  mesne  profits  -  " 

"  Jlean  profits  ?—  is  that  all  you  call  them,  gents  ?  Ton  my 
life,  it's  rogue's  money  —  villain's  profits  !  So  don't  spare 
him—  he's  robbed  the  fatherless,  which  1  am,  and  an  orphan. 
Keep  me  out  of  what's  mine,  indeed!  Curse  me  if  he  shall, 
though  !  " 

"  My  dear  Mr.  Titmouse,"  said  Gammon  gravely,  "  we  are 
getting  on  too  fast—  dreadfully  too  fast.  It  will  never  do  : 
matters  of  such  immense  importance  as  these  cannot  be  hur- 
ried on,  or  talked  of,  in  this  way  -  " 

"  I  like  that,  sir  !—  I  do,  by  Jove  !  " 

"  You  will  really,  if  you  go  on  in  this  wild  way,  Mr.  Tit- 
mouse, make  us  regret  the  trouble  we  have  taken  in  the 
affair,  and  especially  the  promptness  with  which  we  have 
communicated  to  you  the  extent  of  your  possible  good  fort- 
une." 

"  Beg  pardon,  I'm  sure,  gents,  but  mean  no  offence  ;  am 
monstrous  obliged  to  you  for  what  you've  done  for  me—  but, 
by  Jove,  it's  taken  me  rather  aback,  I  own,  to  hear  that  I'm 
to  be  kept  so  long  out  of  it  all  !  Why  can't  you  offer  him, 
whoever  he  is  that  has  my  property,  a  slapping  sum  to  go 
out  at  once  ?  Gents,  I'll  own  to  you  I'm  most  uncommon 
low  —  never  so  low  in  my  life  —  devilish  low  ! 


yet  can't  get  what's  iustly  mine  !    What  am 
meanwhile  ?    Consider  "  that^  gents  !  " 

"  You  are  rather  excited  just  now,  Mr.  Titmouse,"  said  Mr. 
Quirk  seriously  :  "  suppose  we  now  break  up,  and  resume 
our  conversation  to-morrow,  when  we  are  all  in  better  and 
calmer  trim  ?  " 

"No,  sir,  thanking  you  all  the  same  ;  but  I  think  we'd  bet- 
ter go  on  with  it  now,"  replied  Titmouse  impetuously.  "  Do 
you  think  I  can  stoop  to  go  back  to  that  nasty,  beastly  shop, 
and  stand  behind  thet  counter?" 

"  Our  decided  opinion,  Mr.  Titmouse,"  said  Mr.  Quirk, 
emphatically  —  his  other  partners  getting  very  grave  in  their 
looks—"  That  is,  if  our  opinion  is  worth  offering  — 

"  That,  by  Jove  !  remains  to  be  seen,"  said  Titmouse,  with 
a  pettish  shake  of  the  head. 

Well,  such  as  it  is,  we  offer  it  you  ;  and  it  is,  that  for 
many  reasons  you  continue,  for  a  little  while  longer,  in  your 
present  situation  -  ' 

"  What  !  own  Tag-rag  for  my  master—  and  I  worth  £10,000 
a-year  ?  " 

"  My  dear  sir,  you've  not  got  it  yet,"  said  Mr.  Quirk,  with 
a  very  bitter  sarcastic  smile. 

"Do  you  think  you'd  have  told  me  what  you  have,  if  you 
weren't  sure  that  I  should,  though  ?  No.  no  !  you've  gone  too 
far,  by  Jove  !—  I  shall  burst,  1  shall  !  Me  to  go  on  as  before  ! 
they  use  me  worse  and  worse  every  day.  Gents,  you'll  excuse 


TEN  THOUSAND  A-TEAE.  45 

me— I  hope  you  will ;  but  business  is  business,  gents^it  is  ; 
and  if  you  won't  do  mine,  I  must  look  out  for  them  that  will 
— 'pon  my  soul,  I  must,  and — "  If  Mr.  Titmouse  could  have 
seen,  or,  having  seen,  appreciated,  the  looks  which  the  three 
partners  interchanged,  on  hearing  this  absurd,  ungrateful, 
and  insolent  speech  of  his— the  expression  that  flitted  across 
their  shrewd  laces ;  that  was,  of  intense  contempt  for  him, 
hardly  overmastered  and  concealed  by  a  vivid  perception  of 
their  own  interest,  which  was,  of  course,  to  manage,  to  soothe, 
to  conciliate  him ! 

How  the  reptile  propensities  of  his  mean  nature  had  thriven 
beneath  the  sudden  sunshine  of  unexpected  prosperity  !— 
See  already  his  selfishness,  truculence,  ranacity,  in  full 
play! 

*'  So,  gents,"  said  he  after  a  long  and  keen  expostulation 
with  them  on  the  same  subject,  "I'm  really  to  go  to-morrow 
morning  to  Tag-rag  and  Co.'s,  and  go  on  with  the  cursed  life 
I  led  there  to-day,  all  as  if  nothing  had  happened, — ha,  ha, 
ha  !-I  like  that  P 

"  In  your  present  humor,  Mr.  Titmouse,  it  would  be  in 
vain  to  discuss  the  matter,"  said  Mr.  Quirk.  "  Again  I  tell 
you  that  the  course  we  have  recommended  is,  in  our  opinion, 
the  proper  one  ;  excuse  me  if  I  add,  that  you  are  entirely  in 
our  hands — and  if  I  ask  you — what  can  you  do  but  adopt  our 
advice  ?  " 

"Why,  hang  me  if  I  won't  employ  somebody  else— that's 
flat !  S'elp  me,  heaven,  I  will !  So,  good-night,  gents ;  you'll 
find  that  "Tittlebat  Titmouse  isn't  to  be  trifled  with !  "  So 
saying,  Mr.  Titmouse  clapped  his  hat  on  his  head,  bounced 
out  of  the  room,  and,  no  attempt  being  made  to  stop  him,  he 
was  in  the  street  in  a  twinkling. 

Mr.  Gammon  gazed  at  Mr.  Quirk  with  a  look  whose  signif- 
icance the  old  gentleman  throughly  understood— 'twas  com- 
pounded of  triumph,  reproach,  and  apprehension. 

"  Did  you  ever  see  such  a  little  beast ! "  exclaimed  Mr. 
Quirk,  with  an  air  of  disgust,  turning  to  Mr.  Snap. 

"  Beggar  on  horseback  !  "  exclaimed  Snap,  with  a  bitter 
sneer. 

"  It  won't  do,  however,"  said  Mr.  Quirk,  with  a  most 
chagrined  and  apprehensive  air,  "  for  him  to  go  at  large  in 
his  present  frame  of  mind — he  may  ruin  the  thing  alto- 
gether  " 

"  As  good  as  £500  a-year  out  of  the  way  of  the  office,"  said 
Snap. 

"  It  cannot  be  helped  now,"  said  Mr.  Gammon,  with  a  sigh 
of  vexation,  turning  to  Mr.  Quirk,  and  seizing  his  hat—"  he 
must  be  managed— so  I'll  go  after  him  instantly,  and  bring 
him  back  at  all  hazards;  and  we  must  really  try  and  do  some- 
thing for  him  in  the  meanwhile,  to  keep  him  quiet  till  the 
thing's  brought  a  little  into  train."  So  out  went  after  Tit> 


46  TEN  THOUSAND  A-YEAK. 

mouse,  Mr.  Gammon,  from  whose  lips  dropped  persuasion 
sweeter  than  honey ;  and  I  should  not  be  surprised  if  he  were 
to  be  able  to  bring 'back  that  little  stubborn  piece  of  conceited 
stupidity 

As  soon  as  Mr.  Titmouse  heard  the  street  door  shut  after 
him,  with  a  kind  of  bang,  he  snapped  his  fingers  once  or  twice 
by  way  of  letting  off  a  little  of  the  inflammable  air  that  was 
in  him,  and  muttered,  "  Pretty  chaps  those,  upon  my  soul ! 
I'll  expose  them  all !  I'll  apply  to  the  lord  mayor— they're  a 
pack  of  swindlers,  they  are !  This  is  the  way  they  treat  me, 
who've  got  a  title  to  £10,000  a-year !  To  be  sure  "—He  stood 
still  for  a  moment,  and  another  moment,  and  dismay  came 
quickly  over  him;  for  it  suddenly  occurred  to  his  partially 
obfuscated  intellect—what  hold  had  he  got  on  Messrs.  Quirk, 
Gammon,  and  Snap? — what  couLd  he  do? — what  HAD  he 
done? 

Ah — the  golden  vision  of  the  last  few  hours  was  fading 
away  momentarily,  like  a  dream !  Each  second  of  his  deep 
and  rapid  reflection,  rendered  more  impetuous  his  desire  and 
determination  to  return  and  make  his  peace  with  Messrs. 
Quirk,  Gammon,  and  Snap.  By  submission  for  the  present,  he 
could  get  the  whip-hand  of  them  hereafter !  He  was  in  the 
act  of  turning  round  towards  the  office,  when  Mr.  Gammon 
softly  laid  his  hand  upon  the  shoulder  of  his  repentant  client. 

"  Mr.  Titmouse !  my  dear  sir,  what  is  the  matter  with  you? 
How  could  we  so  misunderstand  each  other  ?  " 

Titmouse's  small  cunning  was  on  the  qui  vive,  and  he  saw 
and  followed  up  his  advantage.  "  I  am  going,"  said  he,  in  a 
resolute  tone,  to  speak  to  some  one  else,  in  the  morning." 

"  Ah,  to  be  sure — I  supposed  as  much — 'tis  a  matter  which 
of  course,  however,  signifies  nothing  to  any  one  but  yourself. 
You  will  take  any  steps,  my  dear  sir,  that  occur  to  you,  and 
act  as  you  may  be  advised." 

"  Monstrous  kind  of  you,  'pon  my  life !  to  come  and  give 
me  such  good  advice !  "  exclaimed  Titmouse  with  a  sneer. 

/'  Oh,  don't  mention  it !  "  said  Gammon  coolly ;  "  I  came  put 
of  pure  good  nature,  to  assure  you  that  our  office,  notwith- 
standing what  has  passed,entertains  not  the  slightest  personal 
ill  feeling  towards  you,  in  thus  throwing  off  our  hands  a  fear- 
fully expensive,  and  most  harassing  enterprise— which  we 
had  too  rashly  undertaken " 

"  Hem! "  exclaimed  Titmouse,  once  or  twice. 

So  good-night,  Mr.  Titmouse— good-night !  God  blesa 
you !  we  part  friends ! "  Mr.  Gammon,  in  the  act  of  returning 
to  the  door,  extended  his  hand  to  Mr.  Titmouse,  who  he  in- 
stantly perceived  was  melting  rapidly. 

"  Why,  sir."  quoth  Titmouse,  with  a  mixture  of  embarrass- 
ment  and  alarm,  "  if  I  thought  you  ail  meant  the  correct 
thing— hem !  I  say,  the  correct  thing  by  me— T  shouldn't  se 
much  mind  a  little  disappointment  for  the  time ;  but  yon 


TEN  THOUSAND  A-TEAR.  47 

must  own,  Mr.  Gammon,  it  is  very  hard  being  kept  out  of 
one's  own  so  long — honor,  now !  isn't  it  ?  " 

"  True,  very  true,  Mr.  Titmouse.  Very  hard  it  is,  indeed, 
to  bear,  and  we  all  felt  deeply  for  you,  and  would  have  set 
everthing  in  train " 

"  Would  have " 

"  Yes,  my  dear  Mr.  Titmouse,  we  would  have  done  it,  and 
brought  you  through  every  difficulty — over  every  obstacle, 
prodigious  though  they  are,  and  almost  innumerable." 

"•  Why — you— don't — hardly — quite— mean  to  say  you've 
given  it  all  up?— What,  already!  Ton  my  life!  Oh  Lord!" 
exclaimed  Titmouse,  in  evident  trepidation. 

Mr.  Gammon  had  triumphed  over  Mr.  Titmouse !  whom, 
nothing  loath,  he  brought  back,  in  two  minutes'  time,  into  the 
room  which  Titmouse  had  just  before  so  rudely  quitted.  Mr. 
Quirk  and  Mr.  Snap  had  now  their  parts  to  perform  in  the 
little  scene  which  they  had  determined  on  enacting.  They 
were  in  the  act  of  locking  up  desks  and  drawers,  evidently 
on  the  move  ;  and  received  Mr.  Titmouse  with  an  air  of  cold 
surprise. 

"Mr.  Titmouse  again  !  "  exclaimed  Mr.  Quirk,  taking  his 
gloves  out  of  his  hat.  "  Back  again  ! — an  unexpected  honor." 

"  Leave  anything  behind  ? "  inquired  Mr.  Snap — "  don't 
see  anything " 

"  Oh  no,  sir !  No,  sir ! "  exclaimed  Titmouse,  with  eager 
anxiety.  This  gent,  Mr.  Gammon,  and  I,  have  made  it  all 
up,  gents !  I'm  not  vexed  any  more — not  the  least,  'pon  my 
soul  I'm  not." 

"  Vexed,  Mr.  Titmouse !  "  echoed  Mr.  Quirk,  with  an  air 
sternly  ironical.  "  We  are  under  great  obligations  to  you 
for  your  forbearance ! " 

/'Oh,  come,  gents!"  said  Titmouse,  more  and  more 
disturbed.  "  I  was  too  warm,  I  dare  say,  and — and — I  ask 
your  pardon,  all  of  you,  gents !  I  won't  say  another  word, 
if  you  11  but  buckle  to  business  again — quite  exactly  in  your 
way — because  you  see " 

"  It's  growing  very  late,"  said  Mr.  Quirk  coldly,  and  look- 
ing at  his  watch  ;  "  however,  after  what  you  have  said,  prob- 
ably at  some  future  time,  when  we've  leisure  to  look  into 
the  thing " 

Poor  Titmouse  was  ready  to  drop  on  his  knees,  in  mingled 
agony  and  fright. 

"  May  I  be  allowed  to  say,"  interposed  the  bland  voice  of 
Mr.  Gammon,  addressing  himself  to  Mr.  Quirk,  "  that  Mr. 
Titmouse  a  few  minutes  ago  assured  me,  outside  there,  that 
if  you,  as  the  head  of  the  firm,  could  only  be  persuaded  to  let 
our  house  take  up  his  case  again " 

"  I  did — I  did  indeed,  gents !  so  help  me ! "  interrupted 

Mr.  Titmouse,  eagerly  backing  with  an  oath  the  ready  lie  of 
Mr.  Gammon. 


48  'TEN  THOUSAND  A-YEAR. 

Mr.  Quirk  drew  his  hand  across  his  chin  musingly,  and 
stood  silently  for  a  few  moments,  evidently  irresolute. 

"  Well,"  said  he  at  length,  but  in  a  very  cool  way,  "  since 
that  is  so,  probably  we  may  be  induced  to  resume  our  heavy 
labors  in  your  behalf ;  and  if  you  will  favor  us  with  a  call  to- 
morrow night,  at  the  same  hour,  we  may  have,  by  that  time, 
made  up  our  minds  as  to  the  course  we  shall  think  fit  to 
adopt." 

"  Lord,  sir,  I'll  be  here  as  the  clock  strikes  and  as  meeK  as 
a  mouse ;  and  pray,  have  it  all  your  own  way  for  the  future, 
gents — do ! " 

"  Good-night,  sir— good-night !  "  exclaimed  the  partners, 
motioning  towards  the  door. 

"  Good-night,  gents ! "  said  Titmouse,  bowing  very  low, 
and  feeling  himself  at  the  same  time  being  bowed  out !  As 
he  passed  out  of  the  room,  he  cast  a  lingering  look  at  their 
three  frigid  faces,  as  if  they  were  angels  sternly  shutting  him 
out  from  Paradise.  What  misery  was  his,  as  he  walked 
slowly  homeward,  with  much  the  same  feelings  (now  that 
the  fumes  of  the  brandy  had  somewhat  evaporated,  and  the 
reaction  of  excitement  was  coming  on,  aggravated  by  a  recol- 
lection of  the  desperate  check  he  had  received)  as  a  sick  and 
troubled  man,  who,  suddenly  roused  out  of  a  delicious  dream, 
drops  into  wretched  reality,  as  it  were  out  of  a  fairy-land, 
which,  with  all  its  dear  innumerable  delights,  is  melting 
overheard  into  thin  air — disappearing  forever 

Closet  Court  had  never  looked  so  odious  to  him  as  it  did  on 
his  return  from  this  memorable  interview.  Dreadfully  dis- 
tressed and  harassed,  he  flung  himself  on  his  bed  for  a  mo- 
ment, directly  he  had  shut  his  door,  intending  presently  to 
rise  and  undress ;  but  Sleep,  having  got  him  prostrate,  secured 
her  victory.  She  waved  her  black  wand  over  him,  and — he 
woke  not  till  eight  o'clock  in  the  morning.  A  second  long- 
drawn  sigh  was  preparing  to  follow  its  predecessor,  when 
he  heard  the  clock  strike  eight,  and  sprung  off  the  bed 
in  a  fright ;  for  he  ought  to  have  been  at  the  shop  an  hour 
before.  Dashing  a  little  water  into  his  face,  and  scarce  stay- 
ing to  wipe  it  off,  he  ran  down-stairs,  through  the  court, 
and  along  the  street,  never  stopping  till  he  had  found  his 
way  into — almost  the  very  arms  of  the  dreaded  Mr.  Tag- 
rag  ;  who,  rarely  making  his  appearance  till  about  half-past 
nine,  had,  as  the  deuce  would  have  it,  happened  to  come  down 
an  hour  earlier  than  usual,  on  the  only  morning  out  of 
several  hundred  and  a  half  on  which  Titmouse  had  been  more 
than  ten  minutes  beyond  his  time. 

"  Yours  very  respectfully,  Mr.  Titmouse — Thomas  Tag- 
rag  ! "  exclaimed  that  personage  with  mock  solemnity,  bowing 
formally  to  his  astounded  and  breathless  shopman. 

"I — I— beg  your  pardon,  sir ;  but  I  wasn't  very  well,  and 
over-  slept  myself,"  stammered  Titmouse. 


TEN  THOUSAND  A-TEAE.  49 

"  Ne-ver  mind,  Mr.  Titmouse !  ne-ver  mind ! — it  don't  much 
signify,  as  it  happens,"  interrupted  Mr.  Tag-rag  bitterly  ; 
"  you've  just  got  an  hour  and  a  half  to  take  this  piece  of  silk, 
•with  my  compliments,  to  Messrs.  Shuttle  and  Weaver,  in 
Dirt  Street,  Spitalfields,  and  ask  them  if  they  aren't  ashamed 
to  send  it  to  a  West-end  house  like  mine  ;  and  bring  back  a 
better  piece  instead  of  it !  D'ye  hear,  sir  ?  " 

"  Yes,  sir — but— am  I  to  go  before  my  breakfast,  sir  ?  " 

"  Did  I  say  a  word  about  breakfast,  sir  ?  You  heard  my 
orders,  sir ;  you  can  attend  to  them  or  not,  Mr.  Titmouse,  as 
you  please!" 

On  trotted  Titmouse  instanter,  without  his  breakfast ;  and 
so  Tag-rag  gained  one  object  he  had  had  in  view.  Titmouse 
found  this  rather  trying  ;  a  five-mile  walk  before  him,  with 
no  inconsiderable  load  under  his  arm,  having  had  nothing  to 
eat  since  the  preceding  evening,  when  he  had  partaken  of  a 
delicate  repast  of  thick  slices  of  bread,  smeared  slightly  over 
Avith  salt  butter,  and  moistened  with  a  most  astringent  decoc- 
tion of  tea-leaves  sweetened  with  brown  sugar,  and  discolored 
with  sky-blue  milk.  He  had  not  even  a  farthing  about  him 
wherewith  to  buy  a  penny  roll !  As  he  went  disconsolately 
along,  so  many  doubts  and  fears  buzzed  impetuously  about 
him,  that  they  completely  darkened  his  little  soul,  and  be- 
wildered his  small  understanding.  Ten  Thousand  a- Year  !— 
it  was  never  meant  for  the  like  of  him.  He  soon  worked  him- 
self into  a  conviction  that  the  whole  thing  was  infinitely  too 
good  to  be  true ;  the  affair  was  desperate  ;  it  had  been  all 
moonshine  ;  for  some  cunning  purpose  or  another,  Messrs 
Quirk,  Gammon,  and  Snap,  had  been— ha,  here  he  was  within 
a  few  yards  of  their  residence,  the  scene  of  last  night's  tragic 
transactions !  As  he  passed  Saffron  Hill,  he  paused,  looked 
up  towards  the  blessed  abode, 

"  Where  centred  all  his  hopes  and  fears," — 

uttered  a  profound  sigh,  and  passed  slowly  on  towards 
Spitalfields.  The  words,  "Quirk,  Gammon,  and  Snap" 
seemed  to  be  written  over  every  shop-window  which  he 
passed — their  images  filled  his  mind's  eye.  What  could 
they  be  at?  They  had  been  all  very  polite  and  friendly 
—and  of  their  own  seeking  ;  had  he  affronted  them  ?  How 
coldly  and  proudly  they  had  parted  with  him  overnight !  It 
was  evident  that  they  could  stand  no  nonsense — they  were 
great  lawyers  ;  so  he  must  (if  they  would  allow  him  to  see 
them  again)  eat  humble  pie  cheerfully  till  he  had  got  all  that 
they  had  to  give  him.  How  he  dreaded  the  coming  night ' 
Perhaps  they  intended  civilly  to  tell  him  that  they  would 
have  nothing  more  to  do  with  him;  they  would  get  the 
estate  for  themselves,  or  some  one  else  that  would  be  more 


60  TEN  THOUSAND  A-YEAE. 

manageable !  They  had  taken  care  to  tell  him  nothing  at  all 
about  the  nature  of  his  pretensions  to  this  grand  fortune.  Oh, 
how  crafty  they  were — they  had  it  all  their  own  way ! — But 
what,  after  all,  had  he  really  done  ?  The  estates  were  his,  if 
they  were  really  in  earnest — his,  and  no  one's  else ; 
and  why  should  ne  be  kept  out  of  them  at  their  will  and 
pleasure  ?  Suppose  he  were  to  say  he  would  give  them  all  he 
was  entitled  to  for  £20,000  down,  in  cash  ?  Oh  no ;  on  second 
thoughts,  that  would  be  only  two  years'  income  !  But  on  the 
other  hand — he  dared  hardly  even  propose  it  to  his  thoughts- 
still,  suppose  it  should  really  all  turn  out  true !  Goodness 
gracious ! — that  day  two  months  he  might  be  riding  about  in 
his  carriage  in  the  Parks,  and  poor  devils  looking  on  at  him, 
as  he  now  looked  on  all  those  who  now  rode  there.  There 
he  would  be,  holding  up  his  head  with  the  best  of  them,  in- 
stead of  slaving  about  as  he  was  that  moment,  carrying 
about  that  cursed  bundle,  ough !  how  he  shrunk  as  he  changed 
its  position,  to  relieve  his  aching  right  arm  !  Why  was  his 
mouth  to  be  stopped— why  might  he  not  tell  his  shopmates  ? 
What  would  he  not  give  for  the  luxury  of  telling  it  to  the 
odious  Tag-rag  ?  If  he  were  to  do  so,  Mr.  Tag-rag,  he  was 
sure,  would  ask  him  to  dinner  the  very  next  Sunday,  at  his 
country  house  at  Clapham !— Thoughts  such  as  these  so 
occupied  his  mind,  that  he  did  not  for  a  long  while  ob- 
serve that  he  was  walking  at  a  rapid  rate  toward  the  Mile- 
end  road,  having  left  Whitechapel  church  nearly  half  a  mile 
behind  him !  The  possible  master  of  £10,000  a-year  felt  fit 
to  drop  with  fatigue,  and  sudden  apprehension  of  the  storm 
he  should  have  to  encounter  when  he  first  saw  Mr.  Tag-rag 
after  so  long  an  absence.  He  was  detained  for  a  cruel  length 
of  time  at  Messrs.  Shuttle  and  Weaver's,  who  not  having 
the  required  quantity  of  silk  at  that  moment  on  their 
premises,  had  some  difficulty  in  obtaining  it,  after  having 
sent  for  it  to  one  or  two  neighboring  manufactories ;  by 
by  which  means  it  came  to  pass  that  it  was  two  o'clock  be- 
fore Titmouse,  completely  exhausted  and  dispirited,  and 
reeking  with  perspiration,  had  reached  Tag-rag  and  Com- 
pany s.  The  gentlemen  of  the  shop  had  finished  their  dinners 
Go  up-stairs  and  get  your  dinner,  sir !  "  exclamed  Tag-rag 
imperiously,  after  having  received  Messrs.  Shuttle  and 
Weaver  s  message. 

Titmouse  having  laid  down  his  heavy  bundle  on  the 
counter,  went  upstairs  hungry  enough,  and  found  himself 
the  sole  occupant  of  the  long  close  smelling  room  in  which 
his  companions  had  been  recently  dining.  His  dinner  was 
presently  brought  to  him  by  a  slatternly  slipshod  servant- 
girl.  It  was  in  an  uncovered  basin,  which  appeared  to  con- 
tain nothing  but  the  leavings  of  his  companions— a  savorv 
intermixture  of  cold  potatoes,  broken  meat,  (chiefly  bits  of 
tat  and  gristle,)  a  little  hot  water  having  been  thrown  over  it 


TEN  THOUSAND  A-TEAE.  51 

to  make  it  appear  warm  and  fresh— (faugh !)  His  plate  (with 
a  small  pinch  of  salt  upon  it)  had  not  been  cleaned  after  its 
recent  use,  but  evidently  only  hastily  smeared  over  with  a 
greasy  towel,  as  also  seemed  his  knife  and  fork,  which  in 
their  disgusting  state,  he  was  fain  to  put  up  with,  the  table- 
cloth on  which  he  might  have  wiped  them  having  been  re- 
moved. A  hunch  of  bread  that  seemed  to  have  been  tossing 
about  in  the  pan  for  days,  and  half-a-pint  of  flaklooking  and 
sour-smelling  table-beer,  completed  the  fare  set  before 
him ;  opposite  which  he  sat  for  some  minutes,  too  much 
occupied  with  his  reflections  to  commence  his  repast.  He 
was  in  the  act  of  scooping  out  of  the  basin  some  of  its  in- 
viting contents,  when — "  Titmouse !  "  exclaimed  the  voice  of 
one  of  his  shopmates,  peering  in  at  him  through  the  half- 
opened  door,  "  Mr.  Tag-rag  wants  you  !  He  says  you've  had 
plenty  of  time  to  finish  your  dinner !  " 

"On,  tell  him,  then,  I'm  only  just  beginning  my  dinner — 
eugh !  such  as  it  is,"  replied  Titmouse,  masticating  the  first 
mouthful  with  an  appearance  of  no  particular  relish,  it  may 
be  supposed. 

In  a  few  minutes'  time  Mr.  Tag-rag  himself  entered  the 
room,  stuttering — "  How  much  longer,  sir,  is  it  your  pleasure 
oo  spend  over  your  dinner,  eh  ?  " 

"  Not  another  moment,  sir,"  answered  Titmouse,  looking 
with  ill-concealed  disgust  at  the  savory  victuals  before  him ; 
"  if  you'll  only  allow  me  a  few  minutes  to  go  home  and  buy  a 
penny  roll  instead  of  all  this — 

"  Ve — ry  good,  sir !  Ye — ry  parti— cu — larly  good,  Mr.  Tit- 
mouse," replied  Tag-rag,  with  ill-subdued  fury ;  "  anything 
else  that  I  can  make  a  leetle  memorandum  of  against  the  day 
of  your  leaving  us  '? " 

This  hint  of  two  -  fold  terror,  i.  e.  of  withholding  the 
wretched  balance  of  salary  that  might  be  due  to  him,  on  the 
ground  of  misconduct,  and  of  also  giving  him  a  damning 
character,  dispelled  the  small  remains  of  Titmouse's  appetite, 
and  he  rose  to  return  to  the  shop,  involuntarily  clutching  his 
fist  as  he  brushed  close  past  the  tyrant  Tag-rag  on  the  stairs, 
whom  he  would  have  been  delighted  to  pitch  down  head- 
foremost ;  and  if  he  had  done  so,  none  of  his  fellow-slaves 
below,  in  spite  of  their  present  sycophancy  towards  Tag-rag, 
Avould  have  shown  any  particular  alacrity  in  picking  up  their 
common  oppressor.  Poor  Tittlebat  resumed  his  old  situation 
behind  the  counter ;  but  how  different  his  present  from  his 
former  air  and  manner!  \Vith  his  pen  occasionally  peeping 
pertly  out  of  his  bushy  hair  over  his  right  ear,  and  his  yard 
measure  in  his  hand,  no  one,  till  Monday  morning,  had  been 
more  cheerful,  smirking,  and  nimble  than  Tittlebat  Tit- 
mouse :  alas,  how  crestfallen  now !  None  of  his  companions 
could  make  him  out,  or  guess  what  was  in  the  wind  ;  so  they 
very  justly  concluded  that  he  had  been  doing  something 


52  TEN  THOUSAND  A-YEAIt. 

dreadfully  disgraceful,  the  extent  of  which  was  known  to  Tag. 
rag  and  himself  alone.    Their  jeers  and  banter  were  giving 

S'ace  to  cold  distrustful  looks,  that  were  much  more  trying 
bear.  How  he  longed  to  be  able  to  burst  upon  their  as- 
tounded minds  with  the  pent-up  intelligence  that  was  silent- 
ly racking  and  splitting  his  little  bosom !  But  if  he  did — the 
terrible  firm  of  Quirk,  Gammon,  and  Snap — Oh !  the  very 
thought  of  them  glued  his  lips  together.  There  was  one, 
however,  of  whom  he  might  surely  make  a  confidant — the  ex- 
cellent Huckaback,  with  whom  he  had  had  no  opportunity  of 
communicating  since  Sunday  night.  That  gentleman  was  as 
close  a  prisoner  at  the  establishment  of  DIAPER  and  SARSENET, 
in  Tottenham-court  Road,  as  Titmouse  at  Messrs.  Tag-rag's, 
of  which  said  establishment  he  was  as  great  an  ornament  as 
was  Titmouse  of  that  of  Messrs.  Tag-rag's.  They  were  about 
the  same  height,  and  equals  in  puppyism  of  manners,  dress, 
and  appearance ;  but  Titmouse  was  much  the  better-looking. 
With  equal  conceit  apparent  in  their  faces,  that  of  Huck- 
aback, square,  and  flat,  and  sallow,  had  an  expression  of 
ineffable  impudence,  that  made  a  lady  shudder,  and  a  gentle- 
man feel  a  tingling  sensation  in  his  right  toe.  About  his 
small  black  eyes  there  was  a  glimmer  01  low  cunning ; — but 
he  is  not  of  sufficient  importance  to  be  painted  any  further- 
When  Titmouse  left  the  shop  that  night,  a  little  after  nine, 
he  hurried  to  his  lodgings,  to  make  himself  as  imposing  in  his 
appearance  before  Messrs-  Quirk,  Gammon,  and  Snap,  as  his 
time  and  means  would  admit  of.  Behold,  on  a  table  lay  a 
letter  from  Huckaback.  It  was  written  in  a  flourishing  mer- 
cantile hand ;  and  here  is  a  copy  of  it : — 

"  DEAR  TIT, 

"  I  hope  you  are  well,  which  is  what  I  can  only  middling 
say  in  respect  of  me.  Such  a  row  with  my  governors  as  I 
have  had  to-day !  I  thought  that,  as  I  had  been  in  the  House 
near  upon  Eighteen  Months  at  £25  per  annum,  I  might  nat- 
urally ask  for  £30  a-year  (which  is  what  my  Predecessor  had,) 
when,  would  you  believe  it,  Mr.  Sharp-eye  (who  is  going  to  be 
taken  in  as  a  Partner,)  to  whom  I  named  the  thing,  ris  up  in 
rage  against  me,  and  I  were  had  up  into  the  counting-house, 
where  both  the  governors  was,  and  they  gave  it  me  in  such 
a  way  that  you  never  saw  nor  heard  of ;  but  it  wasn't  all  on 
their  own  side,  as  you  know  me  too  well  to  think  of.  You 
would  have  thought  I  had  been  a-going  to  rob  the  house. 
They  said  I  was  most  oudacious,  and  all  that,  and  ungrateful, 
and  what  wouldt  I  have  next  ?  Mr.  Diaper  said  times  was 
come  to  such  a  pitch ! !  since  when  he  was  first  in  the  busi- 
ness, for  salaries,  says  he,  is  risen  to  double,  and  not  half  the 
work  done  that  was,  and  no  gratitude— (cursed  old  curmud- 
geon !)  He  said  if  I  left  them  just  now,  I  might  whistle  for  a 
character,  except  one  that  I  should  not  like  ;  but  if  he  don't 
Blind  I'll  give  him  a  touch  of  law  about  that— which  brings 


TEN  THOUSAND  A-YEAE.  53 

me  to  what  happened  to-day  with  our  lawyers,  Titty,  the 
people  at  Saffron  Hill,  whom  I  thought  I  would  call  in  on  to- 
day, being  near  the  neighborhood  with  some  light  goods,  to 

see  how  affairs  was  getting  on,  and  stir  them  up  a  bit" 

This  almost  took  Titmouse's  breath  away 

— "  feeling  most  interested  on  your  account,  as  you  know, 
dear  Tit,  I  do.  I  said  I  wanted  to  speali  to  one  of  the  gentle- 
men 011  business  of  wital  importance ;  v/hereat  I  was  quickly 
shown  into  a  room  whore  two  gents  was  sitting.  Having  put 
down  my  parcel  for  a  minute  on  the  table  I  said  I  was  a  very 
intimate  friend  of  yours,  mid  had  called  in  to  see  how  things 
went  on  about  the  advertisement ;  whereat  you  never  saw  in 
your  life  how  struck  they  looked,  and  stared  at  one  another  in 
speechless  silence,  till  they  said  to  me  what  concerned  me 
about  the  business  ?  or  something  of  that  nature,  but  in  such 
a  way  that  ris  a  rag:  in  me  directly,  all  for  your  sake  (for  I 
did  not  !ike  the  lookc  of  things ;)  and  says  I,  I  said,  we  would 
let  them  know  we  were  not  to  be  gammoned  ;  whereat  up 
rose  the  youngest  of  the  two,  and  ringing  the  bell,  he  says  to 
a  tight-laced  youns  gentleman  with  a  pen  behind  his  ear, 
'  Show  him  to  tho  door,'  which  I  was  at  once  ;  but,  in  doing 
so,  let  out  a  little  of  my  mind  to  them.  They're  no  better 
than  they  should  be,  you  see  if  they  are  ;  but  when  we  touch 
the  property,  we'll  show  them  who  is  their  masters,  which 
consoles  me.  Good-by,  keep  your  sperrits  up,  and  I  will  call 
and  tell  you  more  about  it  on  Sunday.  So  farewell  (I  write 
this  at  Mr.  Sharpeye's  desk,  who  is  coming  down  from  dinner 
directly.)— Your  true  friend, 

"  R.  HUCKABACK." 

f "  P.  S. — Met  a  young  Jew  last  night  with  a  lot  of  prime 
cigars,  and  (knowing  he  must  have  stole  them,  they  looked  so 
good  at  the  price,)  I  bought  one  shilling's  worth  for  me,  and 
two  shillings'  worth  for  you,  your  salary  being  higher,  and  to 
say  nothing  of  your  chances. 

All  that  part  of  the  foregoing  letter  which  related  to  its 
amiable  writer's  interview  with  Messrs.  Quirk,  Gammon,  and 
.  Snap,  Titmouse  read  in  a  kind  of  spasm — he  could  not  draw 
a  breath,  and  felt  a  choking  sensation  coming  over  him. 
After  a  while,  "I  may  spare  myself,"  thought  he,  "the 
trouble  of  rigging  out— Huckaback  has  done  iny  business  for 
me  with  Messrs.  Quirk,  Gammon,  and  Snap — mine  will  only 
be  a  walk  in  vain  !  "  And  this  cursed  call  of  Huckaback's, 
too,  to  have  happened  after  what  had  occurred  last  night  be- 
tween Titmouse  and  them  ! !  and  so  urgently  as  he  had  been 
enjoined  to  keep  the  matter  to  himself  !  Of  course,  Huck- 
aback would  seem  to  have  been  sent  by  him  ;  seeing  he  ap- 
peared to  have  assumed  the  hectoring  tone  which  Titmouse 
had  tried  so  vainly  overnight,  and  now  so  bitterly  repented 
of  ;  and  he  had  no  doubt  grossly  insulted  the  arbiters  of  Tit- 


54  TEN  THOUSAND  A-YEAX. 

mouse's  destiny  (for  he  knew  Huckaback's  impudence),— lie 
had  even  said  that  he  (Titmouse)  would  not  be  GAMMONED  by 
them  !  But  time  was  pressing— the  experiment  must  be 
made ;  and  with  a  beating  heart  he  scrambled  into  a  change 
of  clothes— bottling  up  his  wrath  against  the  unconscious 
Huckaback  till  he  should  see  that  worthy.  In  a  miser- 
able state  of  mind  he  set  off  soon  after  for  Saffron  Hill  at 
a  quick  pace  which  soon  became  a  trot,  and  often  sharpened  in- 
to a  downright  run.  He  saw,  heard  and  thought  of  nothing,  as 
he  hurried  along  Oxford  Street  and  Holborn,  but  Quirk, 
Gammon,  Snap,  and  Huckaback,  and  the  reception  which  the 
latter  might  have  secured  for  him— if,  indeed,  he  was  to 
be  received  at  all.  The  magical  words  Ten  Thousand  a-  Year, 
had  not  disappeared  from  the  field  of  his  troubled  vison  ;  but 
how  faintly  and  dimly  they  shone !— like  the  Pleiades  coldly 
glistening  through  intervening  mists  far  off— oh !  at  what  a 
stupendous,  immeasurable,  and  hopeless  distance !  Imagine 
those  stars  gazed  at  by  the  anguished  and  despairing  eyes  of 
the  bereaved  lover,  madly  believing  one  of  them  to  contain 
HER  who  has  just  departed  from  his  arms,  and  from  this  world, 
and  you  may  form  a  notion  of  the  agonizing  feelings— the 
absorbed  contemplation  of  one  dear,  dazzling,  but  distant 
object,  experienced  on  this  occasion  by  Mr.  Titmouse.  No, 
no :  I  don't  mean  seriously  to  pretend  that  so  grand  a  thought 
as  this  could  be  entertained  by  his  little  optics  intellectual ; 
you  might  as  well  suppose  the  tiny  eye  of  a  black  beetle  to  be 
scanning  the  vague,  fanciful,  and  mysterious  figure  and 
proportions  of  Orion,  or  a  chimpanzee  to  perusing  and  pon- 
dering over  the  immortal  Principia.  I  repeat,  that  I  have 
no  desire  of  the  sort,  and  am  determined  not  again  foolishly 
to  attempt  fine  writing,  which  I  now  perceive  to  be  entirely 
9ut  of  my  line.  In  language  more  befitting  me  and  my  sub- 
ject, I  may  be  allowed  to  say  that  there  is  no  getting  the  con- 
tents of  a  quart  into  a  pint  pot :  that  Titmouse's  mind  was  a 
half-pint— and  it  was  brimful.  All  the  while  that  I  have 
been  going  on  thus,  however,  Titmouse  was  hurrying  down 
Holborn  at  a  rattling  rate.  When  at  length  he  had  reached 
Saffron  Hill,  he  was  in  a  bath  of  perspiration.  His  face  was 
quite  red ;  he  breathed  hard ;  his  heart  beat  violently ;  he  had 

g9t  a  stitch  in  his  side ;  and  he  could  not  get  his  gloves  on 
is  hot  and  and  swollen  hands.  He  stood  for  a  moment  with 
his  hat  off,  wiping  his  reeking  forehead,  and  endeavoring 
to  recover  himself  a  little,  before  entering  the  dreaded 
presence  to  which  he  had  been  hastening.  He  even  fancied, 
for  a  moment,  that  his  eyes  gave  out  sparks  of  light !  While 
thus  pausing,  St.  Andrew's  Church  struck  ten,  half  elec- 
trifying Titmouse,  who  bolted  up  the  hill,  and  was  soon  stand, 
ing  opposite  the  door.  Hpw  the  sight  of  it  smote  him,  as  it 
reminded  him  of  the  way  in  which,  on  the  preceding  night, 
he  had  bounced  out  of  it !  But  that  could  not  now  be  helped : 
so  ring  went  the  bell ;  as  softly,  however,  as  he  could ;  for  he 


TEN  THOUSAND  A-YEAE.  55 

recollected  that  it  was  a  very  loud  bell,  and  he  did  not  wish 
to  offend.  He  stood  for  some  time,  and  nobody  answered. 
lie  waited  for  nearly  two  minutes,  and  trembled,  assailed  by 
a  thousand  vague  fears.  He  might  not,  however,  have  rung 
loudly  enough— so— again,  a  little  louder,  did  he  venture  to 
ring.  Again  he  waited.  There  seemed  something  threatening 
in  the  great  brass  plate  on  the  door,  out  of  which  "  QUIRK, 
GAMMON,  AND  SNAP  "  appeared  to  look  at  him  ominously. 
While  he  thought  of  it,  by  the  way,  there  was  something  very 
serious  and  stern  in  all  their  faces— he  wondered  that  he 
had  not  noticed  it  before.  What  a  drunken  beast  he  had 
been  to  go  on  in  their  presence  as  he  had !  thought  he  ;  then 
Huckaback's  image  flitted  across  his  disturbed  fancy.  "  Ah ! " 
thought  he,  "that's  the  thing !— that's  it,  depend  upon  it; 
this  door  will  never  be  opened  to  me  again — he's  done  for 
me ! "  He  breathed  faster,  clenched  his  fist,  and  involuntarily 
raised  it  in  a  menacing  way,  when  he  heard  himself  address- 
ed— "  Oh  !  dear  me,  sir,  I  hope  I  haven't  kept  you  waiting," 
said  the  old  woman  whom  he  had  before  seen,  fumbling  in  her 
pocket  for  the  door-key.  She  had  been  evidently  out  shop- 
ping, having  a  plate  in  her  left  hand,  over  which  her  apron 
was  partially  thrown.  "  Hope  you've  not  been  ringing  long, 
sir !  * 

"  Oh,  dear !  no,  ma'am,"  replied  Titmouse  with  anxious 
civility,  and  a  truly  miserable  smile—"  Afraid  I  may  have 
kept  them  wiating,"  he  added,  almost  dreading  to  hear  the 
answer. 

"  Oh  no,  sir,  not  at  all— they've  all  been  gone  since  a  little 
after  nine ;  but  there's  a  letter  I  was  to  give  you !  "  She  open- 
ed the  door;  Titmouse  nearly  dropped  with  fright.  "I'll 
get  it  for  you,  sir— let  me  see,  where  did  I  put  it  ?— Oh, 
in  the  clerk's  room,  I  think."  Titmouse  followed  her  in. 
"  Dear  me— where  can  it  be  ?  "  she  continued,  peering  about 
and  then  snuffing  the  long  wick  of  the  candle  which  she  had 
left  burning  for  the  last  quarter  of  an  hour,  during  her 
absence.  "I  hope  none  of  the  clerks  has  put  it  away  in 
mistake !  Well,  it  isn't  here,  anyhow." 

"Perhaps,  ma'am,  it's  in  their  own  room,"  suggested 
Titmouse,  in  a  faint  tone. 

"  Oh,  p'r'aps  it  is  !  "  she  replied,  "We'll  go  and  see" — and 
she  led  the  way,  followed  closely  by  Titmouse,  who  caught 
his  breath  as  he  passed  the  green-baize  door.  Yes,  there  was 
the  room — the  scene  of  last  night  was  transacted  there,  and 
came  crowding  over  his  recollection— there  was  the  green- 
shaded  candlestick— the  table  covered  with  paper— an  arm- 
chair near  it,  in  which,  probably,  Mr-  Quirk  had  been  sitting 
only  an  hour  before  to  write  the  letter  they  were  now  in 
quest  of,  and  which  might  be  to  forbid  him  their  presence 
forever!  How  dreary  and  deserted  the  room  looked, 
thought  he,  as  he  peered  about  it  in  search  of  the  dreaded, 
letter ! 


56  TEN  THOUSAND  A-YEAE. 

"  Oh,  here  it  is !— well,  I  never !— who  could  have  put  it 
here,  now  ?  I'm  sure  I  didn't.  Let  me  see— it  was,  no 
doubt"— said  the  old  woman,  holding  the  letter  in  one  hand 
and  putting  the  other  to  her  head. 

"  Never  mind,  ma'am,"  said  Titmouse,  stretching  his  hand 
towards  her—"  now  we've  got  it,  it  don't  much  signify."  She 
gave  it  to  him.  "  Seem  particularly  anxious  for  me  to  get  it- 
did  they  ? "  he  inquired,  \vith  a  strong  effort  to  appear 
unconcerned— the  dreaded  letter  quite  quivering,  the  while, 
in  his  fingers. 

"  No,  sir — Mr.  Quirk  only  said  I  was  to  give  it  to  you 
when  you  called.  B'lieve  they  sent  it  to  you,  but  the  clerk 
said  he  couldn't  find  your  place  out ;  by  the  way,  (excuse  me, 
sir,)  but  yours  is  a  funny  name !  How  I  heard  'em  laughing  at 
it,  to  be  sure !  What  makes  people  give  such  queer  names  ? 
Would  you  like  to  read  it  here,  sir? — you're  welcome." 

"  No,  thank  you,  madam — it's  of  not  the  least  consequence," 
he  replied,  with  a  desperate  air ;  and  tossing  it  with  attempted 
carelessness  into  his  hat,  which  he  put  on  his  head,  he  very 
civilly  wished  her  good-night,  and  departed — very  nearly  in- 
clined to  sickness,  or  faintness,  or  something  of  the  sort, 
which  the  fresh  air  might  perhaps  dispel.  He  quickly  espied 
a  lamp  at  a  corner,  which  promised  to  afford  him  an  un- 
interrupted opportunity  of  inspecting  his  letter.  He  took  it 
out  of  his  hat.  It  was  addressed — simply, 

"  Mr.  Titmouse,  Cocking  Court,  Oxford  Street,"  (which  ac- 
counted, perhaps,  for  the  clerk's  having  been  unable  to  find 
it ;)  and  having  been  opened  with  trembling  eagerness,  thus 
it  read  :— 

"  Messrs.  Quirk,  Gammon,  and  Snap  present  their  compli- 
ments to  Mr.  Titmouse,  and  are  anxious  to  save  him  the 
trouble  of  his  intended  visit  this  evening. 

'•  They  exceedingly  regret  that  obstacles  (which  it  is  to  be 
hoped,  however,  may  not  prove  ultimately  insurmountable) 
exist  in  the  way  of  their  prosecuting  their  intended  inquiries 
on  behalf  of  Mr.  Titmouse. 

"  Since  their  last  night's  inter  view  with  him,  circumstances, 
which  they  could  not  have  foreseen,  and  over  which  they  have 
no  control,  have  occurred,  which  render  it  unnecessary  for 
Mr.  T.  to  give  himself  any  more  anxiety  in  the  affair— at 
least,  not  until  he  shall  have  heard  from  Messrs.  Q.  G.  and 
S.  "If  anything  of  importance  should  hereafter  transpire, 
it  is  not  improbable  that  Mr.  T.  may  hear  from  them. 

"  They  were  favored,  this  afternoon,  with  a  visit  from 
Mr.  T.  s  friend— a  Mr.  Hucklebottom. 

"  Saffron  Hill,  Wednesday  Evening,  12th  July,l8—" 

When  poor  Titmouse  had  finished  reading  over  this  vague, 
frigid,  and  disheartening  note  a  second  time,  a  convulsive 
sob- or  two  pierced  his  bosom,  indicative  of  its  being  indeed 


TEN  THOUSAND  A-TEAE.  57 

swollen  with  sorrow ;  and  at  length  overcome  by  his  feelings, 
he  cried  bitterly— not  checked  even  by  the  occasional 
exclamations  of  one  or  two  passers-by.  He  could  not  at  all 
control  himself.  He  felt  as  if  he  could  have  almost  relieved 
himself,  by  banging  his  head  against  the  wall !  A  tumultu- 
ous feeling  of  mingled  grief  and  despair  prevented  his 
thoughts,  tor  a  long  while,  from  settling  on  any  om  idea  or 
object.  At  length,  when  the  violence  of  the  storm  had 
somewhat  abated,  on  concluding  a  third  perusal  of  the  death- 
warrant  to  all  his  hopes,  which  he  held  in  his  hand,  his  eye 
lit  upon  the  strange  word  which  was  intended  to  describe 
his  friend  Huckaback;  and  it  instantly  changed  both  the 
kind  of  his  feelings,  and  the  direction  in  which  they  had 
been  rushing.  Grief  became  rage ;  and  tho  stream  foamed  in 
quite  a  new  direction—namely,  towards  Huckaback.  That 
fellow  he  considered  to  be  the  sole  cause  of  the  direful  disaster 
which  had  befallen  him.  He  utterly  lost  sight  of  one  cir- 
cumstance, which  one  should  have  thought  might  have  oc- 
curred to  his  thought  at  such  a  time — viz.  his  own  offensive 
and  insolent  behavior  overnight  to  Messrs.  Quirk,  Gammon, 
and  Snap.  But  so  it  was; — yes,  upon  the  devoted  (but 
unconscious)  head  of  Huckaback,  was  to  descend  the  lightning 
rage  of  Tittlebat  Titmouse.  The  fire  that  was  thus  quickly 
kindled  within,  soon  dried  up  the  source  of  his  tears.  He 
crammed  the  letter  into  his  pocket,  and  started  off  at  once  in 
the  direction  of  Leicester  Square,  breathing  rage  at  every 
step — viresque  acquirens  cundo.  His  hands  kept  convulsively 
clenching  together  as  he  pelted  along.  Hotter  and  hotter 
became  his  rage,  as  he  neared  the  residence  of  Huckaback. 
When  he  had  reached  it,  he  sprung  up-stairs  ;  knocked  at 
his  quondam  friend's  door  :  and  on  the  instant  of  its  being — 
doubtless  somewhat  surprisedly  —  opened  by  Huckaback, 
who  was  undressing,  Titmouse  sprung  towards  him,  let  fly 
a  goodly  number  of  violent  Mows  upon  his  face  and  breast 
— and  down  fell  Huckaback  upon  the  bed  behind  him, 
insensible,  and  bleeding  profusely  from  his  nose. 

"  There  !  there  !  " — gasped  Titmouse,  breathless  and 
exhausted,  discharging  a  volley  of  oaths  and  opprobrious 
epithets  at  the  victim  of  his  fury.  "  r>q  it  again !  You  will, 
won't  you !  You'll  go — and  meddle  again  in  other  people's — 

you cu-cu-cursed  officious  "—But  his  rage  was  spent — the 

paroxysm  was  over ;  the  silent  and  bleeding  figure  of  Hucka- 
back was  before  his  eyes ;  and  he  gazed  at  him,  terror-stricken. 
What  had  he  done !  He  sunk  down  -jn  the  bed  beside  Hucka- 
back— then  started  up,  wringing  his  hands,  and  staring  at 
him  in  an  ecstasy  01  remorse  and  fright.  It  was  rather 
singular  that  the  noise  of  such  an  assault  should  have  roused 
no  one  to  inquire  into  it ;  but  so  it  was.  Frightened  almost 
out  of  bis  bewildered  senses,  he  closed  and  bolted  the  door  ; 
and  addressed  himself,  as  well  as  he  was  able,  to  the  recovery 
of  Huckaback.  Propping  him  up,  and  splashing  cold  water 


58  TEN  THOUSAND  A- YEAR. 

on  his  face,  Titmouse  at  length  discovered  symptoms  oi 
revival,  which  he  anxiously  endeavored  to  accelerate,  by 
putting  to  the  lips  of  the  slowly  awakening  victim  of  his 
violence  some  cold  water,  in  a  tea-cup.  He  swallowed  a  little  ; 
and  soon  afterwards,  opening  his  eyes,  stared  on  Titmouse 
with  a  dull  eye  and  bewildered  air. 

"  What's  been  the  matter  ?  "  at  length  he  faintly  inquired 

"  Oh,  Hucky!  so  glad  to  hear  you  speak  again.  It's  I — I— 
Titty !  I  did  it!  Strike  me,  Hucky,  as  soon  as  you're  well 
enough  !  Do — kick  me— anything  you  choose !  I  won't 
hinder  you ! "  cried  Titmouse,  sinking  on  his  knees,  and 
clasping  his  hands  together,  as  he  perceived  Huckaback 
rapidly  reviving. 

Why,  what  is  the  matter  ?  "  repeated  that  gentleman,  with 
a  wondering  air,  raising  his  hand  to  his  nose,  from  which  the 
blood  was  still  trickling.  The  fact  is,  that  he  had  lost  his 
senses,  not  so  much  from  the  violence  of  the  injuries  he  had 
received,  as  from  the  suddenness  with  which  they  had  been 
inflicted. 

"  I  did  it  all— yes,  I  did  !  "  continued  Titmouse,  gazing  on 
him  with  a  look  of  agony  and  remorse. 

/'  Why,  I  can't  be  awake — I  can't!  "  said  Huckaback,  rub- 
bing his  eyes,  and  then  staring  at  his  stained  shirt-front  and 
hands. 

"  Oh,  yes,  you  are— you  are !  "  groaned  Titmouse ;  "  and 
I'm  going  mad  as  fast  as  I  can  !  Do  what  you  like  to  me  ! 
Lick  me  if  you  please !  Call  in  a  constable  !  Send  me  to 
jail !  Say  I  came  to  rob  you — anything — I  don't  car  what 
becomes  of  me !  " 

"  Why,  what  does  all  this  jabber  mean,  Titmouse  ? " 
inquired  Huckaback  sternly,  apparently  meditating  repri 
sals. 

"  Oh,  yes,  I  see  !  Now  you  are  going  to  give  it  me !  I  won't 
stir.  So  hit  away,  Hucky." 

"Why— are  you  mad?"  inquired  Huckaback,  grasping 
him  by  the  collar  rather  roughly. 

''  Yes,  quite !  Mad !— ruined !— gone  to  the  devil  all  at 
once !  " 

"And  what  if  you  are?  What  did  it  matter  to  me  ?  What 
brought  you  to  me,  here  ?  "  continued  Huckaback,  in  a  tone 
of  increasing  vehemence.  "  What  have  I  done  to  offend  you  ? 
How  dare  you.  come  here  ?  And  at  this  time  of  night,  too? 
Eh  ?" 

"  What,  indeed !  Oh  lud,  oh  lud,  oh  lud  !  Kick  me,  I  say 
—strike  me !  You'll  do  me  good,  and  bring  me  to  my  senses. 
Me  to  dp  all  this  to  you !  And  we've  been  such  precious 
good  friends  always.  I'm  a  brute,  Hucky— I've  been  mad, 
stark  mad,  Hucky— and  that's  all  I  can  say." 

Huckaback  stared  at  him  more  and  more  ;  and  began  at 
length  to  suspect  how  matters  stood— namely,  that  the  Sun. 
day  s  incident  had  turned  Titmouse's  head— he  having  also, 


THOUSAND  A-YEAE.  59 

no  doubt,  heard  some  desperate  bad  news  during  the  day, 
smashing  all  his  hopes.  A  mixture  of  emotions  kept  him 
silent.  Astonishment — apprehension— doubt — pride — pique- 
resentment.  He  had  been  struck — his  blood  had  been  drawn 
—by  the  man  there  before  him  on  his  knees,  formerly  his 
friend ;  now,  he  supposed,  a  madman. 

"  Why,  curse  me,  Titmouse,  if  I  can  make  up  my  mind 
what  to  do  to  you  !  "  he  exclaimed.  "  I — I  suppose  you're 
going  mad,  or  gone  mad,  and  I  must  forgive  you.  But  get 
away  with  you— out  with  you,  or— or— I'll  call  in — 

"  Forgive  me— forgive  me,  dear  Hucky  !  Don't  send  me 
away— I  shall  go  and  drown  myself  if  you  do." 

"  What  the  d— 1  do  I  care  if  you  do  ?  You'd  much  better 
have  gone  and  done  it  before  you  came  here.  Nay,  be  off 
and  do  it  now',  instead  of  blubbering  here  in  this  way." 

"  Go  on  !  Hit  away— it's  doing  me  good — the  worse  the 
better  ! "  sobbed  Titmouse. 

"  Come,  come— none  of  this  noise  here.    I'm  tired  of  it." 

"  But,  pray,  don't  send  me  away  from  you,  I  shall  go 
straight  to  the  devil  if  you  do.  I've  no  friend  but  you, 
Hucky.  Yet  I've  been  such  a  villain  to  you  ! — But  it  is  quite 
put  the  devil  into  me,  when  all  of  a  sudden  I  found  it  was 
you."" 

"  Me  ! — Why,  what  are  you  after  ?  "  interrupted  Hucka- 
back, with  an  air  of  angry  wonder. 

"  Oh  dear,  dear !  "  groaned  Titmouse ;  "  if  I've  been  a  brute 
to  you,  which  is  quite  true,  you've  been  the  ruin  of  me  clean  ! 
I'm  clean  done  for,  Huck.  Cleaned  out !  You've  done  my 
business  for  me  ;  knocked  it  all  on  the  head.  I  sha'n't  never 
hear  any  more  of  it — they've  said  as  much  in  their  letter— 
they  say  that  you've  called — 

Huckaback  now  began  to  have  a  glimmering  notion  of  his 
having  been,  in  some  considerable  degree,  connected  with  the 
mischief  of  the  day— an  unconscious  agent  in  it.  He  audibly 
drew  in  his  breath,  as  it  were,  as  he  more  and  more  distinctly 
recollected  his  visit  to  Messrs.  Quirk,  Gammon,  and  Snap  ; 
and  adverted  more  particularly  to  his  threats,  uttered,  too, 
in  Titmouse's  name,  and  as  if  by  his  authority.  Whew! 
here  was  a  kettle  of  fish. 

Now,  strange  and  unaccountable  as,  at  first  thought,  it 
may  appear,  the  very  circumstance  which  one  would  have 
thought  calculated  to  assuage  his  resentment  against  Tit- 
mouse—namely,  that  he  had  really  injured  Titmouse  most 
seriously,  (if  not  indeed  irreparably,)  and  so  provoked  the 
drubbing  which  had'  just  been  administered  to  him— had 
quite  the  contrary  effect.  Paradoxical  as  it  may  seem,  mat- 
ter of  clear  mitigation  was  at  once  converted  into  matter  of 
aggravation.— Were  the  feelings  which  Huckaback  then 
experienced  akin  to  that  which  often  produces  hatred  of  a 
person  whom  one  has  injured  ?  May  it  be  thus  accounted 
lor  ?  That  there  is  a  secret  satisfaction  in  the  mere  con- 


60  TEN  THOUSAND  A-YEAE. 

sciousness  of  being  a  sufferer— a  martyr— and  that,  too,  in 
the  presence  of  a  person  whom  one  perceives  to  be  aware 
that  he  has  wantonly  injured  one ;  that  one's  bruised  spirit 
is  soothed  by  the  sight  of  his  remorse  -by  the  consciousness 
that  he  is  punishing  himself  infinitely  more  roveroly  than 
ice  could  punish  him ;  and  oi!  the  claim  one  has  obtained  to 
the  sympathy  of  everybody  who  sees,  or  may  hear  of  one's 
I  sufferings,  (that  rich  and  grateful  balm  to  injured  feeling.) 
But,  when,  as  In  the  case  of  Huckaback,  feelings  of  this  de- 
scription (in  a  coarse  and  small  way,  to  be  sure,  according  to 
his  kind)  were  suddenly  encountered  by  a  consciousness  of 
his  having  deserved  his  suffering? ;  when  the  martyr  felt 
himself  quick  sinking  into  the  culprit  and  offender ;  when, 
I  say,  Huckaback  felt  an  involuntary  consciousness  that  the 
gross  indignities  which  Titmouse  had  just  inflicted  on  him, 
had  been  justified  by  the  provocation— nay,  far  less  than  his 
mischievous  and  impudent  interference  had  deserved  ; — and 
when  feelings  of  this  sort,  moreover,  were  sharpened  by  a 
certain  tingling  sense  of  physical  pain  from  the  blows  which 
he  had  received — the  rec-ilt  was,  that  the  sleeping  lion  of 
Huckaback's  courage  was  very  near  awakening. 

"  I've  half  a  mind,  Titmouse  "—said  Huckaback,  knitting 
his  brows,  and  appearing  inclined  to  raise  his  arm.  There 
was  an  ominous  pause  for  a  moment  or  two,  during  which 
Titmouse's  feelings  also  underwent  i,  slight  alteration.  His 
allusion  to  Huckaback's  ruinous  insult  to  Messrs.  Quirk, 
Gammon,  and  Snap,  unconsciously  converted  his  remorse 
into  rage,  which  it  rather,  perhaps,  resuscitated.  He  "rose 
from  his  knees.  "Ah!  "said  he,  in  quite  :,n  altered  tone, 
"  you  may  look  fierce !  you  may !— you'd  better  strike  me, 
Huckaback — do !  Finish  the  mischief  you've  begun  this 
day !  Hit  away— you're  quite  safe," — and  he  secretly  prepar- 
ed himself  for  the  mischief  which — did  not  come. 

"  You  have  ruined  me !  you  have,  Huckal.ack !  "  continued 
Titmouse,  with  increasing  vehemence ;  "  and  I  shall  be  cut- 
ting my  throat— nay,"  striking  his  fist  on  the  table,  "  I  will !  " 

il  You  don't  say  so!  "  exclaimed  Huckaback,  apprehen- 
sively. "  No,  Titmouse,  don't— don't  think  of  it;  it  will  all 
1  come  right  yet,  depend  on't ;  you  see  if  it  don't!  " 

"  Oh,  no  !  it's  all  done  for — it's  all  up  with  me ! " 

"  But  what's  been  done  ?— let  us  hear,"  said  Huckaback,  as 
he  passed  a  wet  tovyel  to  and  fro  over  his  ensanguined  feat- 
ures.  It  was  by  this  time  clear  that  the  storm  which  had 
for  some  time  given  out  only  a  few  faint  fitful  flashes  or 
flickerings  in  the  distance,  had  passed  away.  Titmouse,  with 
many  grievous  sighs,  took  out  the  letter  which  had  produced 
the  paroxysms  I  have  been  describing,  and  read  it  aloud. 
"  And  only  see  how  they've  spelled  your  name,  Huckaback 
— look ! "  he  added,  handing  his  friend  the  letter. 

"  How  particular  vulgar !"  exclaimed  Huckaback,  with  a 
contemptuous  air,  which,  overspreading  his  features,  half- 


TEH  THOUSAND  A-YEAE.  6] 

closed  as  was  his  left  eye,  and  swollen  as  were  his  cheek  and 
nose,  would  have  made  him  a  queer  object  to  one  who  had 
leisure  to  observe  such  matters.  "And  so  this  is  all  they  say 
of  me,"  he  continued.  "  How  do  you  come  to  know  that  I've 
been  doing  you  a  mischief  ?  All  I  did  was  just  to  look  in,  as 
respectful  as  possible,  to  ask  how  you  was,  and  they  very 
civilly  told  me  you  was  very  well,  and  we  parted " 

"  Nay,  now,  that's  a  lie,  Huckaback,  and  you  know  it !  " 
interrupted  Titmouse. 

"  It's  true,  so  help  me !  "  vehemently  asseverated 

Huckaback. 

"  Why,  perhaps  you'll  deny  that  you  wrote  and  told  me 
all  you  said,"  interrupted  Titmouse  indignantly,  feeling  in 
his  pocket  for  Huckaback's  letter,  which  that  worthy  had  at 
the  moment  quite  forgotten  having  sent,  and  certainly  seem- 
ed rather  nonplussed  on  being  reminded  of. 

"  Oh — ay,  if  you  mean  that, — hem !  " — he  stammered. 

"  Come,  you  know  you're  a  liar,  Huck— but  it's  no  good 
now  :  liar  or  no  liar,  it's  all  over." 

"  The  pot  and  kettle,  anyhow,  Tit,  as  far  as  that  goes — but 
let's  spell  over  this  letter  ;  we  haven't  studied  it  yet;  I'm  a 
hand,  rather,  at  getting  at  what's  said  in  a  letter ! — Come  " 
—and  they  drew  their  chairs  together,  Huckaback  reading 
over  the  letter  slowly,  alone ;  Titmouse's  eyes  travelling 
incessantly  from  his  friend's  countenance  to  the  letter,  and  so 
back  again,  to  gather  what  might  be  the  effect  of  its  perusal. 

"  There's  a  glimpse  of  daylight  yet,  Titty !  "  said  Hucka- 
back, as  he  concluded  reading  it. 

"  Now !    Is  there  really '?    Do  tell  me,  Hucky " 

"  Why,  first  and  foremost,  how  uncommon  polite  they 
are,  (except  that  they  haven't  manners  enough  to  spell  my 
name  right!) " 

"  Really— and  so  they  are!"  exclaimed  Titmouse,  rather 
elatedly. 

"  And  then,  you  see,  there's  another  thing— if  they'd  meant 
to  give  the  thing  the  go-by  altogether,  what  could  have  been 
easier  than  to  have  said  so? — but  they  haven't  said  anything 
of  the  sort,  so  they  don't  mean  to  give  it  all  up." 

"  Lord,  Huck !  what  would  I  give  for  such  a  nead  as  yours  ! 
What  you  say  is  quite  true,"  said  Titmouse,  still  more  cheer- 
fully. 

"To  be  sure,  they  do  say  there's  an  obstacle — an  obstacle, 

you  see — nay,  it's  obstacles,  which  is  several,  and  that  " 

Titmouse's  face  fell. 

"  But  they  say  again,  that  it's— its— curse  their  big  words 

they  say  it's— to  be  got  over  in  time." 

"  Well— that's  something,  isn't  it?" 

"  To  be  sure  it  is ;  and  a'n't  anything  better  than  nothing  ? 
But  then,  again,  here's  a  stone  in  the  other  pocket  they  say 
there's  a  circumstance!  Don't  you  hate  circumstances, 
Titty?-!  do," 


62  TEN  THOUSAND  A-YEAR. 

"  So  do  I !— What  does  it  mean  ?  I've  often  heard— isn't  it 
a  thing?  And  that  may  be— anything." 

"  Oh,  there's  a  great  dif— hem !  And  they  go  on  to  say  it's 
happened  since  you  was  there  "- 

'  Curse  me,  then,  if  that  don't  mean  you,  Huckaback ! " 
interrupted  Titmouse,  with  returning  anger. 

"  No,  that  can't  be  it ;  they  said  they'd  no  control  over  the 
circumstance  ;— now  they  had  over  me ;  for  they  ordered  me 
to  the  door,  and  I  went ;  a'n't  that  so,  Titty  ?— Lord,  how  my 
eye  does  smart,  to  be  sure !  " 

"  And  don't  I  smart  all  over,  inside  and  out,  if  it  come  to 
that?"  inquired  Titmouse  dolefully. 

"  There's  nothing  particular  in  the  rest  of  the  letter— only 
uncommon  civil,  and  saying  if  anything  turns  up  you  shall 
hear." 

"  ./could  make  that  out  myself— so  there's  nothing  in  that " 
— said  Titmouse  quickly. 

"  Well— if  it  is  all  over— what  a  pity  !  Such  things  as  we 
could  have  done,  Titty,  if  we'd  got  the  thing— eh  ?  " 

Titmouse  groaned  at  this  glimpse  of  the  heaven  he  seemed 
shut  out  of  forever. 

"  Can't  you  find  anything— nothing  at  all  comfortable-like, 
in  the  letter  ?"  he  inquired  with  a  deep  sigh. 

Huckaback  again  took  up  the  letter  and  spelled  it  over. 
"  Well,"  said  he,  striving  to  give  himself  an  appearance  of 
thinking,  "  there's  something  in  it  that,  after  all,  I  don't  seem 
quite  to  get  to  the  bottom  of— they've  seemingly  taken  a  deal 
of  pains  with  it." 

[And  undoubtelly  it  was  a  document  that  had  been  pretty 
well  considered  by  its  framers  before  being  sent  out ;  though, 
probably,  they  had  hardly  anticipated  its  being  so  soon  after- 
wards subjected  to  the  scrutiny  of  the  acute  intellects  which 
were  now  engaged  upon  it.] 

"  And  then,  again,  you  know  they  are  lawyers  ;  and  do 
they  ever  write  anything  that  hasn't  got  more  in  it  than  any- 
body can  find  out  ?  These  gents  that  wrote  this,  they're  a 
trick  too  keen  for  the  thieves  even— and  how  can  ^re—hem ! 
—but  I  wonder  if  that  fat,  old,  bald-headed  gent,  with  sharp 

eyes,  was  Mr.  Quirk " 

To  be  sure  it  was,"  interrupted  Titmouse,  with  a  half 
shudder. 

"  Was  it  ?  Well,  then,  I'd  advise  Old  Nick  to  look  sharp 
before  he  tackles  that  old  gent,  that's  all !  " 

"  Give  me  Mr.  Gammon  for  my  money — such  an  uncom- 
mon gentlemanlike— he's  quite  taken  to  me— 

"  Ah,  that,  I  suppose,  was  him  with  the  black  velvet  waist- 
coat and  white  hands  !  But  he  can  look  stern,  too,  Tit!  You 
should  have  seen  him  ring,  when— hem  !— But  what  was  I 
saying  about  the  letter  ?  Don't  you  see  they  say  they'll  be 
sure  to  write  if  anything  turns  up  ?" 

"  So  they  do,  to  be  sure  !  Well— I'd  forgot  that ! "  inter- 
rupted Titmouse,  brightening  up. 


TEN  THOUSAND  A- YEAR.  63 

"  Then,  isn't  there  their  advertisement  in  the  Flash  f  They 
hadn't  their  eye  011  anything  when  they  put  it  there,  I  dare 
say  ! — They  can't  get  out  of  that,  anyhow ! " 

I  begin  to  feel  all  of  a  sweat,  Hucky ;  I'm  sure  there's 
something  in  the  wind  yet ! "  said  Titmouse,  drawing  nearer 
still  to  his  comforter.  ''And  more  than  that— would  they 
have  said  half  they  did  to  me  last  night " 

"  Eh  !   hollo,  by  the  way !    I've  not  heard  of  what  went  on 
last  night !    So  you  went  to  'em  ?    Well — tell  us  all  that 
happened— and  nothing  but  the  truth,  be  sure  you  don't ; ' 
come,  Titty !  "  said  Huckaback,  snuffing  the  candle,  and  then 
turning  eagerly  to  his  companion. 

"  Well—they'd  such  a  number  of  queer-looking  papers  be- 
fore them,  some  with  old  German-text  writing,  and  others 
with  zig-zag  marks— and  they  were  so  uncommon  polite — 
they  all  three  got  up  as  I  went  in,  and  made  me  bows,  one 
after  the  other,  and  said,  '  Yours  most  obediently,  Mr.  Tit- 
mouse,' and  a  great  many  more  such  things." 

"  Well— and  then  ?  " 

"Why,  Hucky  ?  so  help  me !  and  'pon  my  soul,  that 

old  gent,  Mr.  Quirk,  told  m  "  —Titmouse's  voice  trembled  at 
the  recollection— " he  says,  'Sir,  you're  the  real  owner  of 
Ten  Thousand  a-year.' " 

_"  Lawks ! "  ejaculated  Huckaback,  opening  wider  and  wider 
his  eyes  and  ears  as  his  friend  went  on. 

" '  And  a  title— a  lord  or  something  of  that  sort — and  you've 
a  great  many  country  seats  ;  and  there's  been  £10,000  a-year 
saving  up  for  you  ever  since  you  was  born— and  heaps  of  in- 
terest.'" 

"  Lord,  Tit !  you  take  my  breath  away,"  gasped  Huck- 
aback, his  eyes  fixed  intently  on  his  friend's  face. 

"  Yes  ;  and  they  said  I  might  marry  the  most  beautifulest 
woman  that  ever  my  eyes  saw,  for  the  asking." 

"  You'll  forget  poor  Bob  Huckaback,  Tit !  "  murmured  his 
friend  despondingly. 

"  Not  I " 

"  Have  you  been  to  Tag-rag's  to-day,  after  hearing  all 

[The  thermometer  seemed  to  have  been  plunged  out  of  hot 
water  into  cold — Titmouse  was  down  to  zero  in  a  trice.] 

"  Oh  !— that's  it !  'Tis  all  gone  again  !  What  a  fool  1  am ! 
We've  clean  forgot  this  cursed  letter — and  that  leads  me  to 
the  end  of  what  took  place  last  night.  That  cursed  shop  was 
what  we  split  on  !  " 

"  Split  on  the  shop  !  eh  ?  What's  the  meaning  of  that  ?  " 
inquired  Huckaback,  with  eager  anxiety. 

Why,  that's  the  thing,"  continued  Titmouse,  in  a  falter- 
ing tone,  and  with  a  depressed  look— "That  was  what  I 
wanted  to  know  myself  ;  for  they  said  I'd  better  go  back ! .' 

So  I  said,  'Gents,'  said  I,  I'll  be if  I'll  go  back  to  the 

ghop  any  more  j '  and  I  snapped  my  ringers  at  them— so  \ 


64  TEN  THOUSAND  A-TEAB. 

(for  you  know  what  a  chap  I  am  when  my  blood's  up.)  And 
they  all  turned  gashly  pale—  they  did,  upon  my  life  —  you 
never  saw  anything  like  it  !  And  one  of  them  said  then, 
in  a  humble  way,  'Wouldn't  I  please  to  go  back  to  the 
shop,  just  for  a  day  or  two,  till  things  is  got  to  rights  a  bit.' 
*Not  a  day  nor  a  minute  !  '  says  I,  in  an  immense  rage.  'We 
think  you  d  better,  really,'  said  they.  '  Then,'  says  I,  '  if  that's 
your  plan,  curse  me  if  I  won't  cut  with  you  all,  and  I'll  employ 
some  one  else  !  '  and  —  would  you  believe  me  ?  —  out  I  went, 
bang  !  into  the  street  !  !  " 


"  They  shouldn't  have  given  me  so  much  brandy  and  water 
as  they  did  ;  I  didn't  well  know  what  I  was  about,  what 
with  the  news  and  the  spirits  !  " 

"  And  you  went  into  the  street  ?  "  inquired  Huckaback, 
with  a  kind  of  horror. 

"  I  did,  indeed." 

"  They'd  given  you  the  sperrits  to  see  what  kind  of  a  chap 
you'd  be  if  you  got  the  property—  only  to  try  you,  depend  on 
it  ! 

"  Lord  !  I—  I  dare  say  they  did  !  "  exclaimed  Titmouse, 
elevating  his  head  with  sudden  amazement  ;  totally  forget- 
ting that  that  same  brandy  and  water  he  had  asked  for  —  "  and 
me  never  to  think  of  it  at  the  time  !  " 

"  Now  are  you  quite  sure  you  wasn't  in  a  dream  last  night, 
all  the  while?" 

"  Oh,  dear,  I  wish  I  had  been—  J  do,  indeed,  Hucky  !  " 

"  Well—  you  went  into  the  street-  -what  then  ?"  inquired 
Huckaback,  with  a  sigh  of  exhausted  attention. 

"  Why,  when  I'd  got  there,  I  was  fit  to  bite  my  tongue  off, 
as  one  may  suppose  ;  but,  just  as  I  was  a-turning  to  go  in 
again,  who  should  come  up  to  me  but  Mr.'  Gammon,  saying, 
he  humbly  hoped  there  was  no  offence." 

"  Oh,  glorious  !    So  it  was  ail  set  right  again,  then  eh  ?" 

"  Why  —  I  —  I  can't  quite  exactly  say  that  much,  either  —  but 
—when  I  went  back,  (being  obligated  by  Mr.  Gammon  being 
so  pressing,)  the  other  two  was  sitting  as  pale  as  death  ;  ana 
though  Mr.  Gammon  and  me  went  on  our  knees  to  the  old 
gent,  it  wasn't  any  use  for  a  long  time  ;  and  all  that  he  could  be 
got  to  say  was,  that  perhaps  I  might  look  in  again  to-night 

—  (but  they  first  made  me  swear  a  solemn  oath  on  the  Bible 
never  to  tell  any  one  anything  about  the  fortune)—  and  then 

—  you  went,  Huckaback,  and  you  did  the  business  ;  they  of 
course  concluding  I'd  sent  you  !  " 

"  Oh,  bother  !  that  can't  be.  Don't  you  see  how  civilly 
they  speak  of  me,  in  their  letter  ?  They're  afraid  of  me,  you 
may  depend  on  it.  By  the  way,  Tit,  how  much  did  you 
promise  to  come  down,  if  you  got  the  thing  ?" 

•  Come  down  !  —  I  —  really  —  by  Jove,  I  didn't  !  No  —  I'm  sure 
I  didn't  !  "—answered  Titmouse,  as  if  new  light  had  burst  in, 
upon  him, 


TEN  THOUSAND  A-TEAE.  65 

"  Why,  Tit,  I  never  seed  such  a  goose  !  That's  it,  depend 
Upon  it— it's  the  whole  thing  !  That's  Avhat  they're  driving 
at,  in  the  note !— Why,  Tit,  where  was  your  wits  ?  D'ye 
think  such  gents  as  them— great  lawyers,  too— will  work  for 
nothing  ? — You  write  and  tell  them  you  will  come  down 
handsome  —say  a  couple  of  hundreds,  besides  expenses  —  Gad ! 
'twill  set  you  on  your  pins  again.  Titty !— Rot  me  !  now  I 
think  of  it,  if  I  didn't  dream  last  night  that  you  was  a  Mem- 
ber of  Parliament  or  something  of  that  sort." 

"  A  Member  of  Parliament !  And  so  I  shall,  if  all  this 
turns  up  well." 

"  You  see  if  my  dream  don't  come  true  !  You  see,  Titty, 
I'm  always  a-thinking  of  you,  day  and  night.  Never  was  two 
fellows  that  was  such  close  friends  as  we  was  from  the  begin- 
ning." 

[They  had  been  acquainted  with  each  other  about  a  year.] 

"  Hucky,  what  a  cruel  scamp  I  was  to  behave  to  you  in  the 
way  I  did — curse  me,  if  I  couldn't  cry  to  see  your  eye  bunged 
ap  in  that  way  ! " 

"  Pho !  dear  Titty,  I  knew  you  loved  me  all  the  while— and 
meant  no  harm  ;  you  wasn't  your  self  when  you  did  it — and 
besides,  I  deserve  ten  times  more.  If  you  had  killed  me  I 
should  nave  liked  you  as  much  as  ever  !  " 

"  Give  us  your  hand,  Hucky !  Let's  forgive  one  another ! " 
cried  Titmouse  excitedly :  and  their  hands  were  quickly 
locked  together. 

If  we  don't  mismanage  the  thing,  we  shall  be  all  right  yet, 
Titty  ;  but  you  won't  do  anything  without  speaking  to  me 
first— will  you,  Titty  ?" 

"  The  thoughts  of  it  all  going  right  again  is  enough  to  set 
me  wild,  Hucky! — But  what  shall  we  do  to  set  the  thing 
going  again  ? 

"  Quarter  past  one  ! "  quivered  the  voice  of  the  paralytic 
watchman  beneath,  startling  the  friends  put  of  their  excited 
colloquy ;  his  warning  being  at  the  same  time  silently  second- 
ed by  the  long-wicked  candle,  burning  within  half  an  inch  of 
its  socket.  They  hastily  agreed  that  Titmouse  should  im- 
mediately Avrite  to  Messrs.  Quirk,  Gammon,  and  Snap,  a  prop- 
er [i.e.  a  most  abject  ]  letter,  solemnly  pledging  himself  to 
obey  their  injunctions  in  everything  for  the  future,  and  of- 
fering them  a  handsome  re  ward  for  their  exertions,  if  success- 
ful. 

"  Well—  good-night,  Huck  !  good-night,"  said  Titmouse, 
rising.  "I'm  not  the  least  sleepy— I  sha'n't  sleep  a  wink  all 
night  long !  I  shall  sit  up  to  write  my  letter— you  haven't  got 
a  sheet  of  paper  here,  by  the  way? — I've  used  all  mine." 
[That  was,  he  had,  some  months  before,  bought  a  sheet  to 
write  a  letter,  and  had  so  used  it.] 

Huckaback  produced  a  sheet,  somewhat  crumpled,  from  as 
drawer.  " I'd  give  a  hundred  if  I  had  them ! "  said  he  ;  "I 
sha'n't  care  a  straw  for  the  hiding  I've  got  to-night — though 


66  TEN  THOUSAND  A-TEAR. 

I'm  a  leetle  sore  after  it,  too— and  what  the  deuce  am  I  to  say 
to-morrow  to  Messrs.  Diaper " 

"  Oh,  you  can't  hardly  be  at  a  loss  for  a  lie  that'll  suit  them, 
surely!— So  good-night,  Hucky— good-night !" 

Huckaback  wrung  his  friend's  hand,  and  was  in  a  moment 
or  two  alone.  "  Haven't  my  fingers  been  itching  all  the  while  to 
be  at  the  fellow ! "  exclaimed  he,  as  he  shut  the  door.  "  But, 
somehow,  I've  got  too  soft  a  sperrit,  and  can't  bear  to  hurt 
any  one ;— and  then— if  the  chap  gets  his  £10,000  a-year— why 
—hem !  Titty  a'n't  such  a  bad  fellow,  in  the  main,  after  all. 

If  Titmouse  had  been  many  degrees  higher  in  the  grade  of 
society,  he  would  still  have  met  with  his  Huckaback ;— a  trifle 
more  polished,  perhaps,  but  hardly  more  quicksighted  or 
effective  than,  in  his  way,  had  been  the  vulgar  being  he  had 
just  quitted. 

Titmouse  hastened  homeward.  How  it  was  he  knew  not ; 
but  the  feelings  of  elation  with  which  he  had  quitted  Hucka- 
back did  not  last  long ;  they  rapidly  sunk  in  thee  old  night- 
air,  lower  and  lower,  the  further  he  got  from  Leicester  Square. 
He  tried  to  recollect  what  it  teas  that  had  made  him  take  so 
very  different  a  view  of  his  affairs  from  that  with  which  he 
had  entered  Huckaback's  room.  He  had  still  a  vague  im- 
pressipn  that  they  were  not  desperate ;  that  Huckaback  had 
told  him  so,  and  somehow  proved  it ;  but  how  he  knew  not — 
he  could  not  recollect.  As  Huckaback  had  gone  on  from  time 
to  time,  Titmouse's  little  mind  seemed  to  him  to  comprehend 
and  appreciate  what  was  said,  and  to  gather  encouragement 
from  it ;  but  now— consume  it !— he  stopped— rubbed  his  fore- 
head—what the  deuce  WAS  it  ?  By  the  time  that  he  had  reached 
his  own  door,  he  felt  in  as  deplorable  and  despairing  a  humor 
as  ever.  He  sat  down  to  write  his  letter  at  once  ;  but,  after 
many  vain  efforts  to  express  his  meaning— his  feelings  being 
not  in  the  least  degree  relieved  by  thf  many  oaths  he  uttered 
—he  at  length  furiously  dashed  his  pen,  point- wise,  upon  the 
table,  and  thereby  destroyed  the  only  implement  of  the  sort 
which  he  possessed.  Then  he  tpre,  rather  than  pulled  off  his 
clothes ;  blew  out  his  candle  with  a  furious  puff!  and  threw 
himself  on  his  bed— but  in  so  doing  banged  the  back  of  his 
head  against  the  back  of  the  bed— and  which  suffered  most, 
for  some  time  time  after,  probably  Mr.  Titmouse  was  best 
able  to  tell. 

Hath,  then— oh,  Titmouse!  fated  to  undergo  much!— the 
blind  jade  Fortune,  in  her  mad  vagaries— she,  the  goddess 
whom  thou  hast  so  long  foolishly  worshipped— at  length  cast 
her  sportful  eye  upon  thee  and  singled  thee  out  to  become  the 
envy  of  millions  of  admiring  fools,  by  reason  of  the  pranks 
she  will  presently  make  thee  exhibit  for  her  amusement  ? 

this  be  indeed,  as  at  present  it  promises,  her  intent,  she 
truly,  to  me  calmly  watching  her  movements,  appears  re- 
solved first  to  wreak  her  spite  upon  thee  to  the  uttermost,  and 
make  thee  pass  through  intense  sufferings !  Oh  me  !  Oh 
me  1  Alas ! 


TEN  THOUSAND  A-TEAR.  67 


CHAPTER  III. 

The  means  by  which  Messrs.  Quirk,  Gammon,  and  Snap 
became  possessed  of  the  important  information  which  put 
them  into  motion,  as  we  have  seen,  to  find  out  by  advertise- 
ment one  yet  unknown  to  them,  it  will  not  be  necessary,  for 
some  time— and  which  will  prove  to  have  originated  in  a  very 
remarkable  accident— for  me  to  explain.  Theirs  was  a  keen 
house,  truly,  and  dealing  principally  in  the  criminal  line  of 
business  ;  and  they  would  not,  one  may  be  sure,  have  lightly 
committed  themselves  to  their  present  extent,  namely,  in  in- 
serting such  an  advertisement  in  the  newspapers,  and,  above 
all,  going  so  far  in  their  disclosures  to  Titmouse.  Their  pru- 
dence in  the  latter  step,  however,  was  very  questionable  to 
themselves  even ;  and  they  immediately  afterwards  deplored 
together  the  precipitation  with  which  Mr.  Quirk  had  com- 
municated to  Titmouse  the  nature  and  extent  of  his  possible 
good  fortune.  It  was  Mr.  Quirk' sown  doing,  however,  and 
after  as  much  expostulation  as  the  cautious  Gammon  could 
venture  to  use.  I  say  they  had  not  lightly  taken  up  the  af- 
fair :  they  had  not  "  acted  unadvisedly .""  They  were  fortified, 
first,  bythe  opinions  of  Mr.  Mortmain,  an  able  and  experienced 
conveyancer,  who  thus  wound  up  an  abstrusely  learned  opin. 
ion  on  the  voluminous  "  case  "  which  had  been  submitted 
to  him  : — 

"  *  *  Under  all  these  circumstances,  and  assuming  as  above, 
I  am  decidedly  of  opinion  that  the  title  to  the  estate  in  question 
is  at  this  moment  not  in  their  present  possessor,  (who  repre- 
sents the  younger  branch  of  the  Dreddlington  family,)  but 
in  the  descendants  of  Stephen  Dreddlington,  through  the  fe- 
male line ;  which  brings  us  to  Gabriel  Tittlebat  Titmouse. 
This  person,  however,  seems  not  to  have  been  at  all  aware  of 
the  existence  of  his  rights,  or  he  could  hardly  have  been  con- 
cerned in  the  pecuniary  arrangements  mentioned  at  fol.  33  of 
the  case.  Probably  something  may  be  heard  of  his  heir  by 
making  careful  inquiry  in  the  neighborhood  where  he  was 
last  heard  of,  and  issuing  advertisements  for  his  heir-at-law ; 
care,  of  course,  being  taken  not  to  be  so  specific  in  the  terms 
of  such  advertisement  as  to  attract  the  notice  of  A.  B. ,  (the 
party  now  in  possession.)  If  such  person  should,  by  the  means 
above  suggested,  be  discovered,  I  advise  proceedings  to  be 
commenced  forthwith,  under  the  advice  01  some  gentleman 
of  experience  at  the  common-law  bar. 

"  MOULDY  MORTMAIN. 
"  Lincoln's  Inn, 

January  19, 18—." 

This  was  sufficiently  gratifying  to  the  "  house ;  "  but,  to 
make  assurance  doubly  sure,  before  embarking  in  so  harass- 


Qfi  TEN  THOUSAND  A-YEAR. 

ing  and  expensive  an  enterprise— one  which  lay  a  good  deal, 
too,  without  the  sphere  of  their  practice,  which,  as  already 
mentioned,  was  chiefly  in  criminal  law— the  same  case  (with- 
out Mr.  Mortmain's  opinion)  was  laid  before  a  younger  convey- 
ancer, who,  having  much  less  business  than  Mr.  Mortmain, 
would,  it  was  thought,  "  look  into  the  case  fully,"  though  re- 
ceiving only  one-third  of  the  fee  which  had  been  paid  to  Mr. 
Mortmain.  And  Mr.  FUSSY  FRANKPLEDGE— that  was  his 
name— did  "  look  into  the  case  fully,"  and  in  doing  so,  turned 
over  two-thirds  of  his  little  library  ;— and  also  gleaned — by 
note  and  verbally — the  opinions  upon  the  subject  of  some 
half-dozen  of  his  "  learned  friends  "  to  say  nothing  of  the  mag- 
nificent  air  with  which  he  indoctrinated  his  eager  and  con- 
fiding pupils  upon  the  subject.  At  length  his  imp  of  a  clerk 
bore  the  precious  result  of  his  master's  labors  to  Saffron  Hill, 
in  the  shape  of  an  "opinion,"  three  times  as  long  as,  and  in- 
describably more  difficult  to  understand  than,  the  opinion  of 
Mr.  Mortmain ;  and  which,  if  it  demonstrated  anything  be- 
yond the  prodigious  cram  which  had  been  undergone  by  its 
writer  for  the  purpose  of  producing  it,  demonstrated  this — 
namely,  that  neither  the  party  indicated  by  Mr.  Mortmain, 
nor  the  one  then  actually  in  P9ssession,  had  any  more  right 
to  the  estate  than  the  aforesaid  Mr.  Frankpledge ;  but  that 
the  happy  individual  so  entitled  was  some  third  person. 
Messrs.  Quirk  and  Gammon,  a  good  deal  flustered  hereat, 
hummed  and  hawed  on  perusing  these  contradictory  opinions 
of  counsel  learned  in  the  law  j  and  the  proper  result  f olloAved 
— i.  e.  a  "CONSULTATION,"  which  was  to  solder  up  all  the  dif- 
ferences between  Mr.  Mortmain  and  Mr.  Frankpledge,  or,  at 
all  events,  strike  out  some  light  which  might  guide  their 
clients  on  their  adventurous  way. 

Now,  Mr.  Mortmain  had  been  Mr.  Quirk's  conveyancer 
(whenever  such  functionary's  services  had  been  required) 
for  about  twenty  years  j  and  Quirk  was  ready  to  suffer  death 
in  defence  of  any  opinion  of  Mr.  Mortmain.  Mr.  Gammon 
swore  by  Frankpledge,  who  had  been  at  school  with  him,  and 
was  a  "  rising  man."  Mortmain  belonged  to  the  old  school— 
,  Frankpledge  steered  by  the  new  lights.  The  former  could 
point  to  some  forty  cases  in  the  Law  Reports,  which  had  been 
ruled  in  conformity  with  his  previously  given  opinion,  and 
some  twenty  which  had  been  overruled  thereby  ;  the  latter 
gentleman,  although  he  had  been  only  five  years  in  practice, 
had  written  an  opinion  which  had  led  to  a  suit— which  had 
ended  in  a  difference  of  opinion  between  the  Court  of  King's 
Bench  and  the  Common  Pleas :  the  credit  of  having  done 
which  was,  however,  some  time  afterwards,  a  little  bit 
tarnished  by  the  decision  of  a  Court  of  Error,  without  hear- 
ing the  other  side,  against  the  opinion  of  Mr.  Frankpledge. 

Mr.  Frankpledge  quoted  so  many  cases,  and  went  to  the 
bottom  of  everything,  and  gave  so  much  for  his  money— and 
was  so  civil  — 


TEN  THOUSAND  A-YEAE.  69 

Well,  the  consultation  came  off,  at  length,  at  Mr.  Mort- 
main's chambers,  at  eight  o'clock  in  the  evening.  A  few 
minutes  before  that  hour,  Messrs.  Quirk  and  Gammon  were 
to  be  seen  in  the  clerk's  room,  in  civil  conversation  with  that 
prim  functionary,  who  explained  to  them  that  he  did  all  Mr. 
Mortmain's  drafting — pupils  were  so  idle ;  that  Mr.  Mort- 
main did  not  score  out  much  of  what  he  (the  aforesaid  clerk) 
had  drawn ;  that  he  noted  up  Mr.  Mortmain's  new  cases  for 
him  in  the  reports,  Mr.  M.  having  so  little  time  ;  and  that 
the  other  day  the  Vice  Chancellor  called  on  Mr.  Mortmain — 
with  several  other  matters  of  that  sort,  calculated  to  enhance 
the  importance  of  Mr.  Mortmain  ;  who,  as  the  clerk  was  ask- 
ing Mr.  Gammon,  in  a  good-natured  way,  how  long  Mr. 
Frankpledge  had  been  in  practice,  and  where  his  chambers 
were— made  his  appearance,  with  a  cheerful  look  and  a  bust- 
ling gait,  havino1  just  walked  down  from  his  house  in  Queen's 
Square,  with  a  comfortable  bottle  of  old  port  on  board. 
Shortly  afterwards  Mr.  Frankpledge  arrived,  followed  by  his 
little  clerk,  bending  beneath  two  bags  of  books,  (unconscious 
bearer  of  as  much  law  as  had  well-nigh  split  thousands  of 
learned  heads,  and  broken  tens  of  thousands  of  hearts,  in  the 
making  of,  being  destined  to  have  a  similar  but  far  greater 
effect  in  the  applying  of,)  and  the  consultation  began. 

As  Frankpledge  entered,  he  could  not  help  casting  a  sheep's 
eye  towards  a  table  that  glistened  with  such,  an  array  of 
"  papers,"  (a  tasteful  arrangement  of  Mr.  Mortmain's  clerk 
before  every  consultation  ;)  and  down  sat  the  two  conveyan- 
cers and  the  two  attorneys.  I  devoutly  wish  I  had  time  to 
describe  the  scene  at  length  ;  but  greater  events  are  pressing 
upon  me.  The  two  conveyancers  fenced  with  one  another 
for  some  time  very  guardedly  and  good-humoredly ;  pleas- 
ant was  it  to  observe  the  conscious  condescension  of  Mort- 
main, the  anxious  energy  and  volubility  of  Frankpledge. 
When  Mr.  Mortmain  said  anything  that  seemed  weighty  or 
pointed,  Quirk  looked  with  an  elated  air,  a  quick  triumphant 
glance,  at  Gammon ;  who,  in  his  turn,  whenever  Mr.  Frank- 
pledge  quoted  an  "  old  case  "  from  Bendloe,  Gqdsbolt,  or  the 
Year  Books,  (which,  haying  always  piqued  himself  on  his 
almost  exclusive  acquaintance  with  the  modern  cases,  he 
made  a  point  of  doing,)  gazed  at  Quirk  with  a  smile  of  placid 
superiority.  Mr.  Frankpledge  talked  almost  the  whole  time ; 
Mr.  Mortmain,  immovable  in  the  view  of  the  case  which  he 
had  taken  in  his  "  opinion,"  listened  with  an  attentive,  good- 
natured  air,  ruminating  pleasantly  the  while  upon  the  qua- 
lity of  the  port  he  had  been  drinking,  (the  first  of  the  bin 
which  he  had  tasted)  and  upon  the  decision  which  the  Chan- 
cellor might  come  to  on  a  case  brought  into  court  on  his 
advice,  and  which  had  been  argued  that  afternoon.  At  last 
Frankpledge  unwittingly  fell  foul  of  a  favorite  crotchet  of 
Mortmain's— and  at  it  they  went,  hammer  and  tongs,  for 
nearly  twenty  minutes,  (it  had  nothing  whatever  to  do  with 


70  TEN  THOUSAND  A-YEAE. 

the  case  they  were  consulting  upon).  In  the  end,  Mortmain  of 
course  adhered  to  his  points,  and  Frankpledge  entrenched 
himself  in  his  books ;  each  slightly  yielded  to  the  views  of  the 
other  on  immaterial  points,  (or  what  could  have  appeared  the 
use  of  the  consultation?)  but  did  that  which  both  had  re- 
solved upon  doing  from  the  first,  i.  e.  sticking  to  his  origi- 
nal opinion.  Both  had  talked  an  amazing  deal  of  deep  law, 
which  had  at  least  one  effect,  viz.  it  fairly  drowned  both 
Quirk  and  Gammon,  who  as  they  went  home,  with  not  (it 
must  be  owned)  the  clearest  perceptions  in  the  world  of  what 
had  been  going  on,  (though,  before  going  to  the  consultation, 
each  had  really  known  something  about  the  case,)  stood  each 
stoutly  by  his  conveyancer's  opinion,  each  protesting  that  he 
had  never  been  once  misled — Quirk  by  Mortmain,  or  Gammon 
by  Frankpledge— and  each  resolved  to  give  his  man  more  of 
the  conveyancing  business  of  the  house  than  he  had  before- 
I  grieve  to  add.  that  they  parted  that  night  with  a  trifle  less 
of  cordiality  than  had  been  their  wont.  In  the  morning, 
however,  this  little  irritation  and  competition  had  passed 
away ;  and  they  agreed,  before  giving  up  the  case,  to  take  the 
final  opinion  of  Mr.  TKESAYLE — the  great  Mr.  Tresayle.  He 
was,  indeed,  a  wonderful  conveyancer — a  perfect  miracle  of 
real-property  law-learning.  He  had  had  such  an  enormous 
practice  for  forty-five  years,  that  for  the  last  ten  he  had  never 
put  his  nose  out  of  chambers  for  pure  want  of  time,  and  at 
last  of  inclination  ;  and  had  been  so  conversant  with  Norman 
French  and  law  Latin,  in  the  old  English  letter,  that  he  had 
almost  entirely  forgotten  how  to  write  the  modern  English 
character.  His  opinions  made  their  appearance  in  three 
different  kinds  of  handwriting.  First,  one  that  none  but  he 
and  his  own  clerk  could  make  out ;  secondly  one  that  none  but 
he  himself  could  read ;  and  thirdly,  one  that  neither  he,  nor 
his  clerk,  nor  any  one  on  earth,  could  decipher.  The  use  of 
any  one  of  these  styles  depended  on — the  difficulty  of  the 
case  to  be  answered.  If  it  were  an  easy  one,  the  answer  was 
very  judiciously  put  into  No.  I. ;  if  rather  difficult,  it,  of 
course,  went  int9  No.  II. ;  and  if  exceedingly  difficult,  (and 
also  important,)  it  was  very  properly  thrown  into  No.  III. ; 
being  a  question  that  really  ought  not  to  have  been  asked, 
and  did  not  deserve  an  answer.  The  fruit  within  these  un- 
couth shells,  however,  was  precious.  Mr.  Tresayle's  law  was 
supreme  over  everybody's  else.  It  was  currently  rep9rted 
that  Lord  Eldon  even  (who  was  himself  slightly  acquainted 
with  such  subjects)  reverently  deferred  to  the  authority  of  Mr. 
Tresayle ;  and  would  lie  winking  and  knitting  his  shaggy 
eyebrows  half  the  night,  if  he  thought  that  Mr.  Tresayle's 
opinion  on  a  case  and  his  own  differed.  This  was  the  great 
authority  to  whom,  as  in  the  last  resort,  Messrs.  Quirk, 
Gammon,  and  Snap  resolved  to  appeal.  To  his  chambers 
they,  within  a  day  or  two  after  their  consultation  at  Mr. 
Mortmain's,  dispatched  their  case,  with  a  highly  respectable 


TEN  THOUSAND  A-YEAE.  71 

fee,  and  a  special  compliment  to  his  clerk,  hoping  to  hear 
from  that  awful  quarter  within  a  month — which  was  the 
earliest  average  period  within  which  Mr.  Tresayle's  opinions 
found  their  way  to  his  patient  but  anxious  clients.  It  came 
at  length,  with  a  note  from  Mr.  Prim,  his  clerk,  intimating 
that  they  would  find  him,  i.  e.  the  aforesaid  Mr.  Prim,  at 
chambers  the  next  morning,  prepared  to  explain  the  opinion 
to  them  ;  having  just  had  it  read  over  to  him  by  Mr.  Tres- 
ayle,  for  it  proved  to  be  in  No.  II.  The  opinion  occupied  about 
two  pages  ;  and  the  handwriting  bore  a  strong  resemblance 
to  Chinese  or  Arabic,  with  a  quaint  intermixture  of  the 
uncial  Greek  character — it  was  impossible  to  contemplate  it 
without  a  certain  feeling  of  awe !  In  vain  did  old  Quirk  squint 
at  it,  from  all  corners,  for  nearly  a  couple  of  hours,  (having 
first  called  in  the  assistance  of  a  friend  of  his,  an  old  attorney 
of  upward  of  fifty-years'  standing ;)  nay — even  Mr.  Gammon, 
foiled  at  length,  could  not  for  the  life  of  him  refrain  from  a 
soft  curse  or  two.  Neither  of  them  could  make  anything  of 
it — (as  for  Snap,  they  never  showed  it  to  him ;  it  was  not 
within  his  province — i.  e.  the  Insolvent  Debtors'  Court,  the 
Old  Bailey,  the  Clerkeiiwell  Sessions,  the  Police  Officers,  the 
inferior  business  of  the  Common  Law  Courts,  and  the  worry- 
ing of  the  clerks  of  the  office— a  department  in  which  he  was 
perfection  itself.) 

To  their  great  delight,  Mr.  Tresayle's  opinion  completely 
corroborated  that  of  Mr.  Mortmain,  (neither  whose  nor  Mr. 
Frankpledge's  had  been  laid  before  him.)  Nothing  could  be 
more  terse,  perspicuous,  and  conclusive  than  the  great  man's 
opinion.  Mr.  Quirk  was  in  raptures,  and  immediately  sent 
out  for  an  engraving  of  Mr.  Tresayle,  which  had  lately  come 
out,  for  which  he  paid  5s.,  and  ordered  it  to  be  framed  and 
hungup  in  his  own  room,  where  already  grinned  a  quaint  re- 
semblance, in  black  profile,  of  Mr.Mortinain.  In  special  good 
humor,  he  assured  Mr.  Gammon,  (who  was  plainly  some- 
what crest-fallen  about  Mr.  Frankpledge, )  that  everybody 
must  have  a  beginning ;  and  even  he  himself  (Mr.  Quirk)  had 
been  once  only  a  beginner. 

Once  fairly  on  the  scent,  Messrs.  Quirk  and  Gammon  soon 
began,  secretly  but  energetically,  to  push  their  inquiries. 
They  discovered  that  Gabriel  Tittlebat  Titmouse,  having 
spent  the  chief  portion  of  his  blissful  days  as  a  cobbler  at 
Whitehaven,  had  died  in  London,  somewhere  about  the  year 
17 — .  At  this  point  they  stood  for  a  long  while,  in  spite  of 
two  advertisements,  to  which  they  had  been  driven  with  the 
greatest  reluctance,  for  fear  of  attracting  the  attention  of 
those  most  interested  in  thwarting  their  efforts.  Even  that 
part  of  the  affair  had  been  managed  somewhat  skilfully.  It 
was  a  stroke  of  Mr.  Gammon's  to  advertise  not  for  "  Heir-at- 
Law,"  but "  Next  of  Kin"  as  the  reader  has  seen.  The  former 
might  have  challenged  a  notice  of  unfriendly  curiosity,  which 
the  latter  was  hardly  calculated  to  attract.  At  length— at 


70  TEN  THOUSAND  A-YEAR. 

the  "  third  time  of  asking  "  —up  turned  Tittlebat  Titmouse, 
in  the  way  which  we  have  seen.  His  relationship  with  Mr. 
Gabriel  Tittlebat  Titmouse  was  indisputable ;  in  fact,  he  was 
that "  deceased  person's"  son  and  heir-at-law.  The  reader  may 
guess  the  chagrin  and  disgust  of  Mr.  Gammon  at  the  ap- 
pearance, manner,  and  character  of  the  person  whom  he  fully 
belie  ved,on  first  seeing  him  at  Messrs.  Tagrag's  to  be  the  right- 
ful owner  of  the  fine  estates  held  by  one  who,  as  against  Tit- 
mouse, had  no  more  real  title  to  them  than  had  Mr-  Tagrag ; 
and  for  whom  their  house  was  to  undertake  the  very  grave 
responsibility  of  instituting  such  proceedings  as  "\yould  be 
requisite  to  place  Mr.  Titmouse  in  the  position  which  they 
believed  him  entitled  to  occupy— haying  to  encounter  a  hot 
and  desperate  opposition  at  every  point,  from  those  who  had 
nine-tenths  of  the  law  — to  wit,  possession — on  their  side, 
on  which  they  stood  as  upon  a  rock ;  and  with  immense  means 
for  carrying  on  the  war  defensive.  That  Messrs.  Quirk, 
Gammon,  and  Snap  did  not  contemplate  undertaking  all  this, 
without  having  calculated  upon  its  proving  well  worthy  their 
while,  was  only  reasonable.  They  were  going  voluntarily  to 
become  the  means  of  conferring  immense  benefits  upon  one 
who  was  a  total  stranger  to  them — who  had  not  a  penny  to 
expend  upon  the  prosecution  of  his  own  rights.  Setting  aside 
certain  difficulties  which  collected  themselves  into  two  awk- 
ward words,  MAINTENANCE  and  CHAMPERTY,  and  stared 
them  in  the  face  whenever  they  contemplated  any  obvious 
method  of  securing  the  just  reward  of  their  enterprise  and 
toils— setting  aside  all  this,  I  say,  it  might  turn  out,  only  after 
a  ruinous  expenditure  had  been  incurred,  that  the  high  author- 
ities which  had  sanctioned  their  proceedings,  in  point  of  law, 
had  expressed  their  favorable  opinions  on  a  state  of  facts, 
which,  however  satisfactorily  they  looked  on  paper,  could  not 
be  properly  substantiated,  if  keenly  sifted,  and  determinedly 
resisted.  All  this,  too — all  their  time,  labor,  and  money,  to 
go  for  nothing — on  behalf  of  a  vulgar,  selfish,  ignorant,  pre- 
sumptuous, ungrateful  puppy,  like  Titmouse.  Well  indeed, 
therefore,  might  Mr.  Gammon,  as  we  have  seen  he  did,  give 
himself  and  partners  a  forty-eight  hours'  interval  between 
his  interview  with  Titmouse  and  formal  introduction  of  him 
to  the  firm,  in  which  to  consider  their  position  and  mode  of 
procedure .  The  taste  of  his  quality  which  that  first  interview 
afforded  them  all— so  far  surpassing  all  that  the  bitter  de- 
scription of  him  given  to  them  by  Mr.  Gammon  had  prepared 
them  for— filled  them  with  inexpressible  disgust,  and  would 
have  induced  them  to  throw  up  the  whole  affair— so  getting 
rid  both  of  it  and  him  together.  But  then,  on  the  other  hand, 
there  were  certain  very  great  advantages,  both  of  a  profes- 
sional and  even  directly  pecuniary  kind,  which  it  would  have 
been  madness  indeed  for  any  office  lightly  to  throw  away. 
It  was  really,  after  all,  an  unequal  struggle  between  feeling 
and  interest.  If  they  should  succeed  in  unseating  the 


TEN  THOUSAND  A-YEAR.  75 

ent  wrongful  possessor  of  a  very  splendid  property,  and  put- 
ting in  his  place  the  rightful  owner,  by  means  alone  of  their 
own  professional  ability,  perseverance,  and  heavy  pecuniary 
outlay,  (a  fearful  consideration,  truly,  but  Mr.  Quirk  had 
scraped  together  some  thirty  thousand  pounds  !)  what  recom- 
pense could  be  too  great  for  such  resplendent  services  ?  To 
say  nothing  of  the  eclat  which  it  would  gain  for  their  office, 
in  the  profession  and  in  the  world  at  large,  and  the  sub- 
stantial and  permanent  advantages,  if,  as  they  ought  to  be, 
they  were  intrusted  with  the  general  management  of  the 
property  by  the  new  and  inexperienced  and  confiding  owner 
— ay,  but  there  was  the  rub !  What  a  disheartening  and  dis- 
gusting specimen  of  such  new  owner  had  disclosed  itself  to 
their  anxiously  expecting  but  soon  recoiling  eyes— always, 
however,  making  due  allowances  for  one  or  two  cheering  in- 
dications, on  Mr.  Titmouse's  part,  of  a  certain  rapacious  and 
litigious  humor,  which  might  pleasantly  and  profitably  oc- 
cupy their  energies  for  some  time  to  come !  Their  position  and 
interests  had  long  made  them  sharp  observers ;  but  when  did 
ever  before,  low  and  disgusting  qualities  force  themselves  in- 
to revolting  prominence,  as  his  had  done,  in  the  very  moment 
of  an  expected  display  of  the  better  feelings  of  human  nature 
— such  as  enthusiastic  gratitude '?  They  had  in  their  time 
had  to  deal  with  some  pleasant  specimens  of  humanity,  to  be 
sure ;  but  when  with  any  more  odious  and  impracticable  than 
Tittlebat  Titmouse  threatened  to  prove  himself  ?  What  hold 
could  they  get  upon  such  a  character  as  his '?  Beneath  all 
his  coarseness  and  weakness,  there  was  a  glimmer  of  low 
cunning  which  might  suffice  to  keep  their  superior  and  prac- 
ticed astuteness  in  full  play.  These  were  difficulties,  cheer- 
less enough  in  the  contemplation,  truly  ;  but,  nevertheless, 
the  partners  could  not  bear  the  idea  of  escaping  from  them 
by  throwing  up  the  affair  altogether.  Then  came  the  ques- 
tion—How were  they  to  manage  Titmouse  ?— how  acquire  an 
early  and  firm  hold  of  him,  so  as  to  convert  him  into  a  capi- 
tal client  f  His  fears  and  his  interests  were  obviously  the 
engines  with  which  their  experienced  hands  were  to  work ; 
and  several  long  and  most  anxious  consultations  had  Messrs. 
Quirk,  Gammon,  and  Snap  had  on  this  important  matter. 
The  first  great  question  with  them  was— To  what  extent,  and 
when,  they  should  acquaint  him  with  the  nature  of  his 
expectations. 

Gammon  was  for  keeping  him  comparatively  in  the  dark, 
till  success  Avas  within  reach :  during  that  interval,  (which 
might  be  a  long  one,)  by  alternately  stimulating  his  hopes 
and  fears ;  by  habituating  him  to  an  entire  dependence  on 
them ;  by  persuading  him  of  the  extent  of  their  exertions  and 
sacrifices  on  his  benalf — they  might  do  something ;  mould 
him  a  little  into  shape  fit  for  their  purposes ;  and  persuade 
him  that  his  affairs  must  needs  goto  ruin  but  in  their  hands. 
Something  like  this  was  the  scheme  of  the  cautious,  acute, 


74  TEN  THOUSAND  A-YEAll. 

and  placid  Gammon.  Mr.  Quirk  (with  whom  had  originated 
the  whole  disco  very)  thought  thus:— tell  the  fellow  at  once 
the  whole  extent  of  what  we  can  do  for  him,  viz.,  turn  a 
half-starving  linen-draper's  shopman  into  the  owner  of 
£10,000  a-year,  and  of  a  great  store  of  ready  money.  This 
will,  in  a  manner,  stun  him  into  submission,  and  make  him  at 
once  and  for  all  what  we  want  him  to  be.  He  will  im- 
mediately fall  prostrate  with  reverent  gratitude— looking  at 
us,  moreover,  as  three  gods,  who  at  our  will  can  shut  him 
out  of  heaven.  "  That's  the  way,"  said  Mr.  Quirk ;  and 
Mr.  Quirk  had  been  forty  years  in  practice— had  made  the 
business  what  it  was— still  held  half  of  it  in  his  own  hands, 
(two-thirds  of  the  remaining  half  being  Gammon's  and  the 
residue  Snap's  ;)  and  Gammon,  moreover,  had  a  very  distinct 
perception  that  the  funds  for  carrying  on  the  war  would  come 
out  of  the  tolerably  well-stored  pockets  of  their  senior 
partner.  So,  after  a  long  discussion,  he  openly  yielded  his 
opinion  to  that  of  Mr.  Quirk— cherishing,  however,  a  very 
warm  respect  for  it  in  his  own  bosom.  As  for  Snap,  that 
distinguished  member  of  the  firm  was  very  little  consulted 
in  the  matter ;  which  had  not  yet  been  brought  into  that 
stage  where  his  powerful  energies  could  come  into  play.  He 
had  of  course,  however,  heard  a  good  deal  of  what  was  going 
on :  and  knew  that  erelong  there  would  be  the  copying  out 
and  serving  of  the  Lord  knows  how  many  copies  of  declara- 
tions in  ejectment,  motions  against  the  casual  ejector,  and  so 
forth— so  far  at  least  as  he  was  "  up  to  "  all  those  quaint  and 
anomalous  proceedings.  It  had,  therefore,  been  at  length 
agreed  that  the  communication  to  Titmouse,  on  his  first 
interview,  of  the  full  extent  of  his  splendid  expectations, 
should  depend  upon  the  discretion  of  Mr.  Quirk.  The  reader 
has  seen  the  unexpected  turn  which  matters  took  upon  that 
important  occasion;  and  if  it  proved  Quirk's  policy  to  be 
somewhat  inferior  in  point  of  discretion  and  long-sightedness 
to  that  of  Gammon,  still  it  must  be  owned  that  the  latter  had 
cause  to  admire  the  rapid  generalship  with  which  the  con- 
sequences of  Quirk's  false  move  had  been  retrieved  by  him — 
not  ill  seconded  by  Snap.  What  could  have  been  more 
judicious  than  his  reception  of  Titmouse,  on  the  occasion  of 
his  being  led  in  again  by  the  subtle  Gammon? 

The  next  and  greatest  matter  was,  how  to  obtain  any  hold 
upon  such  a  person  as  Titmouse  had  shown  himself,  so  as  to 
secure  to  themselves,  in  the  event  of  success,  the  remunera- 
tion to  which  they  considered  themselves  entitled.  Was  it 
so  perfectly  clear  that,  if  he  felt  disposed  to  resist  it,  they 
could  compel  him  to  pay  the  mere  amount  of  their  bill  of 
costs  ? 

Suppose  he  should  turn  round  upon  them,  and  have  their 
BILL  TAXED— Quirk  grunted  with  fright  at  the  bare  thought. 
Then  there  was  a  slapping  quiddam  honorarium  extra — un- 
doubtedly for  that  they  must,  they  feared,  trust  to  the  honor 


TEN  THOUSAND  A-YEAR.  75 

and  gratitude  of  Titmouse ;  and  a  pretty  taste  of  his  quality 
they  had  already  experienced !  Such  a  disposition  as  his,  to 
have  to  rety  upon  for  the  prompt  settlement  of  a  bill  of 
thousands  of  pounds  of  costs !  and,  besides  that,  to  have  it  to 
look  to  for  the  payment  of  at  least  some  five  or  perhaps  ten 
thousand  pounds  douceur — nay,  and  this  was  not  all.  Mr. 
Quirk  had,  as  well  as  Mr.  Gammon,  cast  many  an  anxious 
eye  on  the  following  passages  from  a  certain  work  entitled 
JBlackstone's  Commentaries : — 

"  MAINTENANCE  is  an  officious  intermeddling  in  a  suit  that 
no  way  belongs  to  one,  by '  maintaining  '  or  assisting  either 
party  with  money,  or  otherwise,  to  prosecute  or  defend  it.*  * 
It  is  an  offence  against  public  justice,  as  it  keeps  alive  strife 
and  contention,  and  perverts  the  remedial  process  of  the  law 
into  an  engine  of  oppression.*  *  The  punishment  by  com- 
mon-law is  fine  and  imprisonment,  and  by  statute  32  Hen. 
VIII.  c.  9,  a  forfeiture  of  £10  ! 

"  CHAMPERTY — (carnpi  partitio] — is  a  species  of  Mainte- 
nance, and  punished  in  the  same  manner ;  being  a  bargain 
with  a  plaintiff  or  defendant '  campum  partirij  to  divide  the 
land,  or  other  matter  sued  for  between  them,  if  they  prevail 
at  law ;  whereupon  the  champertor  is  to  carry  011  the  suit  at 
his  own  expense.*  *  These  pests  of  civil  society,  that  are 
perpetually  endeavoring  to  disturb  the  repose  of  their  neigh- 
bors, and  officiously  interfering  in  other  men's  quarrels, 
even  at  the  hazard  of  their  own  fortunes,  were  severely 
animadverted  on  by  the  Roman  law ;  and  they  were  punish- 
ed by  the  forfeiture  of  a  third  part  of  their  goods,  and  per- 
petual infamy."  * 

These  were  pleasant  passages  surely! — 

Many  were  the  conversations  and  consultations  which  the 
partners  had  had  with  Messrs.  Mortmain  and  Frankpledge 
respectively,  upon  the  interesting  question,  whether  there 
were  any  mode  of  at  once  securing  themselves  against  the 
ingratitude  of  Titmouse,  and  protecting  themselves  against 
the  penalties  of  the  law.  It  made  old  Mr.  Quirk's  bald  head, 
even,  flush  all  over  whenever  he  thought  of  their  bill  being 
taxed,  or  contemplated  himself  the  inmate  of  a  prison,  (above 
all,  at  his  advanced  time  of  life,)  with  mournful  leisure  to 
meditate  upon  the  misdeeds  that  had  sent  him  thither,  to 
which  profitable  exercise  the  legislature  would  have  specially 
stimulated  him  by  a  certain  fine  above  mentioned.  As  for 
Gammon,  he  knew  there  must  be  a  way  of  doing  the  thing 
someho\v  or  another ;  for  his  friend  Frankpledge  felt  infinite- 
ly less  difficulty  in  the  way  than  Mortmain,  whom  he  con- 
sidered a  timid  and  old-fashioned  practitioner.  The  courts, 
said  Mr.  Frankpledge,  were  now  setting  their  faces  strongly 
against  the  doctrine  of  Maintenance,  as  being  founded  on  a 
bygone  state  of  things ;  cessante  ratione  cessat  et  ipsa  lex,  was 

*  Gladstone's  Commentaries,  vol.  iv.  pp,  134-5, 


76  TEN  THOUSAND  A-YEAE. 

his  favorite  maxim .  There  was  no  wrong  without  a  remedy, 
he  said ;  and  was  there  not  a  wrong  in  the  case  of  a  poor  man 
wrongfully  deprived  of  his  own  ?  And  how  could  this  be 
remedied,  if  the  old  law  of  Maintenance  stood  like  a  bugbear 
in  the  way  of  humane  and  spirited  practitioners  ?  Was  no 
one  to  be  able  to  take  up  the  cause  of  the  oppressed, 
encouraged  by  the  prospect  of  an  ample  recompense  ?  If  it 
was  said— let  the  claimant  sue  in  formd  pavperis;  but  then 
he  must  swear  that  he  is  not  worth  five  pounds  ;  and  a  man 
may  not  be  able  to  take  that  oath,  and  yet  be  unequal  to  the 
commencement  of  a  suit  requiring  the  outlay  of  thousands. 
Moreover,  a  pretty  prospect  it  was  for  such  a  suitor,  (in 
formd  pauper  is,}  it  he  should  happen  to  be  non-suited — to  be 
"  put  to  his  election,  whether  to  be  whipped  or  pay  the 
costs."  *  Thus  reasoned  within  himself  that  astute  person, 
Mr.  Frankpledge ;  and  at  length  satisfied  himself  that  he  had 
framed  an  instrument  which  would  "  meet  the  case  " — that 
"  would  hold  water."  To  the  best  of  my  recollection,  it  was 
a  BOND,  conditioned  to  pay  the  sum  of  ten  thousand  pounds  to 
Messrs.  Quirk,  Gammon,  and  Snap,  within  two  months  of 
Titmouse's  being  put  into  possession  of  the  rents  and  profits 
of  the  estate  in  question.  The  condition  of  that  bond  was,  as 
its  f ramer  believed,  drawn  in  a  masterly  manner ;  and  his 
draft  was  lying  before  Messrs.  Quirk,  Gammon,  and  Snap,  on 
the  Wednesday  morning,  (i.  e.  the  day  after  Titmouse's 
interview  with  them,)  and  had  succeeded  at  length  in  excit- 
ing the  approbation  of  Mr.  Quirk  himself ;  when — whew ! — 
down  came  a  note  from  Mr.  Frankpledge,  to  the  effect  that, 
"  since  preparing  the  draft  bond,"  he  had  "  had  reason  slight- 
ly to  modify  his  original  opinion,"  owing  to  his  "  having  lit 
upon  a  LATE  CASE,"  in  which  an  instrument,  precisely  similar 
to  the  one  which  he  had  prepared  for  his  admiring  clients, 
had  been  held  "totally  ineffectual  and  void  both  at  law  and 
in  equity."  I  say,  Mr.  Frankpledge's  note  was  to  that  effect : 
for  so  ingeniously  had  he  framed  it— so  effectually  concealed 
his  retreat  beneath  a  little  cloud  of  contradictory  authorities, 
like  as  the  ink-fish,  they  say,  eludeth  his  pursuers— that  his 
clients  cursed  the  law,  not  their  draftsman  :  and,  moreover, 
by  prudently  withholding  the  name  of  the  "  late  case,"  he  at 
all  events,  for  a  while,  had  prevented  their  observing  that  it 
was  senior  to  some  eight  or  ten  cases  which  (indefatigable 
man !)  he  had  culled  for  them  out  of  the  legal  garden,  and 
arrayed  on  the  back  of  his  draft,  Slightly  disconcerted  were 
Messrs.  Quirk  and  Gammon,  it  may  be  believed,  at  this  new 
view  of  the  "result  of  the  authorities."  "Mortmain  is 
always  right ! "  said  Quirk,  looking  hard  at  Gammon ;  who 
observed  simply  that  one  day  Frankpledge  would  be  as  old 
as  Mortmain  then  was— by  which  time  (thought  he)  I  also 

*  Blackstone,  vol  iii.  p.  400,  where  it  is  stated,  however,  that  " 
practice  is  now  disused," 


TEN  THOUSAND  A-YEAR.  77 

know  where  you  will  be,  my  old  friend,  if  there's  any  truth 
in  the  Scriptures !  In  this  pleasant  frame  of  mind  were  the 
partners,  when  the  impudent  apparition  of  Huckaback 
presented  itself,  in  the  manner  which  has  been  described. 
I  luckaback's  commentary  upon  the  disgusting  text  of  Tit- 
mouse overnight,  (as  a  lawyer  would  say,  in  an  analogy  to 
a  well-known  term,  "  Coke  upon  Littleton,")  produced  an  ef- 
fect upon  their  minds  which  may  be  guessed  at.  It  was  while 
their  minds  were  under  these  two  soothing  influences,  *.  e.  of 
the  insolence  of  Huckaback  and  the  vacillation  of  Frank- 
pledge,  that  Mr  Gammon  had  penned  the  note  to  Titmouse, 
(surely,  under  the  circumstances,  one  of  extraordinary  temper 
and  forbearance,)  which  had  occasioned  Titmouse  the  agonies 
which  I  have  been  attempting  faintly  to  describe  ; — and  that 
Quirk,  summoning  Snap  into  the  room,  had  requested  him 
to  give  orders  for  denial  to  Titmouse  if  he  should  again  make 
his  appearance  at  the  office ;  which  injunction  Snap  forthwith 
delivered  in  the  clerk's  room,  in  a  tone  and  manner  that  were 
a  very  model  of  the  imperative  mood. 

A  day  or  two  afterwards,  Mr.  Quirk,  (Avho  was  a  man  that 
stuck  like  a  limpet  to  a  rock  to  any  point  which  occurred  to 
him,)  in  poring  over  that  page  in  the  fourth  volume  of  Black- 
stone's  Commentaries,  where  were  to  be  found  the  passages 
which  have  been  already  quoted,  (and  which  both  Quirk  and 
Gammon  had  long  had  off  by  heart,)  as  he  sat  one  day  at 
dinner,  at  home,  whither  he  had  taken  the  volume  in  ques- 
tion, fancied  he  had  at  last  hit  upon  a  notable  crotchet,  which, 
the  more  he  thought  of,  the  more  he  was  struck  with ;  deter- 
mining to  pay  a  visit  in  the  morning  to  Mr.  Mortmain.  The 
spark  of  light  that  had  twinkled  till  it  kindled  in  the  tinder 
of  his  mind,  was  struck  by  his  hard  head  out  of  the  follow- 
ing sentence  of  the  text  in  question  : — 

"  A  man  may,  however,  maintain  the  suit  of  his  near  kins- 
man, servant,  or  POOR  NEIGHBOR,  out  of  charity  and  com- 
passion, with  impunity ;  otherwise,  the  punishment  is," 
etc.  etc.* 

Now,  it  seemed  to  Mr.  Quirk,  that  the  words  which  I 
have  placed  in  italics  and  small  capitals,  exactly  met  the 
case  of  poor  Tittlebat  Titmouse.  He  stuck  to  that  view  of 
the  case,  till  he  almost  began  to  think  that  he  really  had 
a  kind  of  a  sort  of  a  charity  and  compassion  for  poor  Tit- 
tlebat—kept out  of  his  rights— tyrannized  over  by  a  vulgar 
draper  in  Oxford  Street— where,  too,  no  doubt,  he  was  half- 
starved.—"  It's  a  great  blessing  that  one's  got  the  means— 
and  the  inclination,  to  serve  one's  poor  neighbors"— thought 
Quirk,  as  he  slowly  swallowed  another  glass  of  the  wine 
that  maketh  glad  the  heart  of  man— and  also  softens  it ;— for 
the  more  he  drank,  the  more  and  more  pitiable  became  his 
mood — the  more  sensitive  was  he  to  compassionate  sugges- 

*  Blackstone^s  Commentaries,  vol.  iv.  p.  135. 


78  TEN  THOUSAND  A-TEAE. 

tions :  and  by  the  time  he  had  finished  the  decanter,  he  wag 
actually  in  tears.  These  virtuous  feelings  brought  their  own. 
reward,  too— for,  from  time  to  time,  they  conjured  up,  as  it 
were,  the  faint  rainbow  image  of  a  bond  conditioned  for  the 
payment  of  TEN  THOUSAND  POUNDS  ! 

To  change  the  metaphor  a  little — by  the  time  that  old  Quirk 
had  reached  his  office  in  the  morning,  the  heated  iron  had 
cooled  ;  if  his  heart  had  retained  any  of  the  maudlin  soft- 
ness of  the  preceding  evening,  the  following  pathetic  letter 
from  Titmouse  might  have  made  a  very  deep  impression 
upon  it,  and  fixed  him,  in  the  benevolent  and  disinterested 
mind  of  the  old  lawyer,  as  indeed  his  "  poor  neighbor."  The 
following  is  an  exact  copy  of  it.  It  had  been  written  by  Tit- 
mouse, all  out  of  his  own  head ;  and  with  his  own  hand  had 
he  left  it,  at  a  late  hour  on  the  night  before. 

"  To  Messrs.  QUERK,  GAMON,  and  SNAPE. 

"  GENTS, 

"  Yr  Esteem'd  Favour  lies  now  before  Me,  which  must  Say 
have  Given  me  Much  Concern,  seeing  I  Thought  it  was  All 
Made  up  betwixt  us  That  was  of  Such  an  Unpleasant  Nature 
on  Tuesday  night  (ultimo)  wu  I  most  humbly  Own  (and 
Acknowledge)  was  all  alone  and  intirely  of  My  Own  Fault, 
and  Not  in  the  Least  Yours  which  behaved  to  me,  Must  say, 
In  the  most  Respectful  and  superior  manner  that  was  pos- 
sible to  think  Of,  for  I  truly  Say  I  never  was  In  the  Company 
of  Such  Imminent  and  superior  Gents  before  in  my  life  wu 
will  take  my  Oath  sincerely  Of,  Gents.  Please  to  consider 
the  Brandy  (wu  do  think  was  Uncommon  Stiff)  such  a  flust- 
rum  As  I  Was  In  before,  to,  wh  was  Evident  to  All  of  Us 
there  then  Assemblid  and  very  natral  like  to  be  the  Case 
Seeing  I  have  nevir  known  what  Peas  of  Mind  was  since  I 
behaved  in  Such  a  Oudacious  way  w11  truly  was  the  case  I 
can't  Deny  to  Such  Gents  as  Yourselfs  that  were  doing  me 
such  Good  Fortune  And  Kindness  to  me  as  it  would  Be  a 
Dreadful  sin  and  shame  (such  as  Trust  I  can  never  be  Guilty 
of)  to  be  (wh  am  not)  and  never  Can  Be  insensible  Of,  Gents 
do  Consider  all  this  Favourably  because  of  my  humble, 
Amends  w11 1  here  Make  with  the  greatest  Trouble  in  my 
Mind  that  I  have  Had  Ever  Since,  it  was  all  of  the  Sperrits 
I  Tooke  wh  made  me  Go  On  at  such  a  Rate  wh  was  always 
(beg  to  Assure  yr  most  respe  house)  the  Case  Since  my  birth 
when  I  took  Sperrits  never  so  little  Since  I  had  the  Meazles 
when  I  was  3  Years  Old  as  I  Well  Recollect  and  hope  it  will 
be  Born  in  Mind  what  is  Often  Said,  and  I'm  Sure  I've  read 
it  Somewhere  Else  that  People  that  Is  Drunk  Always  speaks 
the  Direct  Contrarywise  of  their  True  and  Real  Thoughts, 
(wh  am  certain  never  was  any  Thing  Truer  in  my  case)  so  a 
I  get  the  Money  or  What  not,  do  whatever  you  "Like  wh  are 
quite  welcome  to  Do  if  you  please,  and  no  questions  Asked, 


TEN  THOUSAND  A-YEAft.  7& 

don't  Mind  saying  by  The  Way  It  shall  Be  As  Good  as  £200 
note  in  The  way  of  your  Respe  House  if  I  Get  the  Estate  of 
wh  am  much  in  Want  of.  Mr.  Gamon  (wh  is  the  most  Up- 
right gent  that  ever  I  came  across  in  All  my  Life)  will  tell 
you  that  I  Was  Quite  Cut  up  when  he  came  After  me  in  that 
kind  Way  and  told  him  Then  how  I  loved  yr  Respect6  House 
and  would  do  all  In  My  power  to  Serve  You,  which  see  if  I 
Don't,  I  was  in  Such  a  rage  with  that  Fellow  (He's  only  in  a 
Situation  in  Tottenham  O  Road)  Huckaback  which  is  his 
true  name  it  was  an  audacious  thing,  and  have  given  him 
such  a  Precious  Good  hiding  last  Night  as  you  never  saw 
when  on  his  Bendid  Knees  He  asked  the  pardon  of  your 
Respectable  House,  says  nothing  Of  Me  wh  wd  not  allow  be- 
cause I  said  I  would  Not  Forgive  Him  because  he  had  not 
injured  me  :  But  you,  w11 1  wonder  at  his  Impudence  in  Call- 
ing on  Professional  Gents  like  you,  if  I  get  The  Estate  shall 
never  cease  to  Think  well  of  you  and  mean  While  how  full 
of  Trouble  I  am  Often  Thinking  Of  Death  which  is  the  End 
of  Every  Thing  And  then  in  that  Case  who  will  the  Property 
Go  to  Seeing  I  Leave  never  a  Brother  or  Sister  Behind  me. 
And  Therefore  Them  That  wd  Get  it  I  Feel  Sure  of  wd  Not 
do  So  Well  by  you  (if  You  will  Only  believe  Me)  So  Gents. 
This  is  All  at  present  That  I  will  Make  so  Bold  to  trouble 
you  With  About  my  Unhappy  Affairs  Only  to  say  That  am 
nsedmost  Intolerably  Bad  now  In  The  Shop  quite  Tyranicall 
And  Mr.  Tag-Rag  as  Set  Them  All  Against  Me  and  I  shall 
Never  Get  Another  Situatn  for  want  of  a  Cha1'  which  he  "\yill 
give  me  says  notg  at  Present  of  the  Sort  of  Victules  wh  give 
me  Now  to  Eat  Since  Monday  last,  For  Which  am  Sure 
the  Devil  must  have  Come  In  to  That  Gentleman  (Mr.  Tag- 
rag,  he  was  only  himself  in  a  Situation  in  Holborn  once, 
fettg  the  Business  by  marryy  the  widow  wh  wonder  At  for 
e  is  nothing  Particular  to  Look  At.)  I  am  yrs 

Humbly  to  Command  Till  Death  (always 
Humbly  Begging  pardon  for  the  bad  Conduct  \vi>  was  guilty 
of  when  In  Liquor  Especially  On  an  Empty  Stomach,  Hav- 
ing Taken  Nothing  all  that  Day  excepting  what  I  could  not 
Eat,) 

"  Your's  most  Respy 

"  TITTLEBAT  TITMOUSE. 

"P.  S.  Will  Bring  that  young  Man  with  Tears  In  his  Eyes 
to  Beg  yr  pardon  Over  again  If  You  Like  wh  will  Solemnly 
Swear  if  Required  That  he  did  It  all  of  His  own  Head  And 
that  Have  given  It  him  For  it  in  the  Way  That  is  Written 
Above  And  humbly  Trust  You  Will  make  Me  So  happy 
Once  more  by  Writing  To  Me  (if  it  is  only  a  Line)  To  say  You 
Have  Thought  No  more  of  it.  T.  T.  No  9  Closet  O.  Oxford 
Street.  14/7/18— " 


80  TEN  THOUSAND  A-YEAJl. 

This  touching  epistle,  I  was  saying,  might  have  brought 
tears  into  Mr.  Quirk's  eyes,  if  he  had  been  used  to  the  melt- 
ing mood,  which  he  was  not ;  having  never  been  seen  to  shed 
a  tear  but  once— when  five-sixths  of  his  little  bill  costs  (£196, 
15s.  4d.)  were  taxed  off  in  an  action  on  a  Bill  of  Exchange 
for  £20.  As  it  was,,  he  tweedled  the  letter  about  in  his 
hands  for  about  five  minutes,  in  a  musing  mood,  and  then 
stepped  with  it  into  Mr.  Gammon's  room.  That  gentleman 
took  the  letter  with  an  air  of  curiosity,  and  read  it  over ;  at 
every  sentence  (if  indeed  a  sentence  there  was  in  it)  bursting 
into  soft  laughter. 

"  Ha,  ha,  ha !  "  he  laughed  on  concluding  it — "  a  comical 
gentleman,  Mr.  Titmouse,  upon  my  honor !  a 

"  Funny— isn't  it  rather  ?  "  interposed  Mr.  Quirk,  standing 
with  his  hands  fumbling  about  in  nis  breeches  pocket. 

"  "What  a  crawling  despicable  little  rascal !— ha,  ha,  ha ! 

"Why— I  don't  quite  say  that,  either,"  said  Quirk,  doubt 
inglv— "  I— don't  exactly  look  at  it  in  that  light !  " 

My  dear  sir!"  exclaimed  Gammon,  leaning  back  in  his 
chair,  and  laughing  rather  heartily,  (at  least  for  him.) 

"  You  can't  leave  off  that  laugh  of  yours,"  said  Quirk,  a 
little  tartly ;  "  but  I  must  say  I  don't  see  anything  in  the  let- 
ter to  laugh  at  so  particularly.  It  is  written  in  a  most  re- 
spectful manner,  and  shows  a  proper  feeling  towards  the 
house." 

"  Ay !  see  how  he  speaks  of  me !  "  interrupted  Gammon, 
with  such  a  smile !  — 

"  And  doesn't  he  speak  so  of  me  ?  and  all  of  us  ?  " 
v    "He'll  let  the  house  tread  on  him  till  he  can  tread  on  the 
house,  I  dare  say." 

"  But  you  must  own,  Mr.  Gammon,  it  shows  we've  licked 
him  int9  shape  a  bit7~eh  ?  " 

"  Oh,  it's  a  little  vile  creeping  reptile  now,  and  so  it  will  be 
to  the  end  of  the  chapter— of  our  proceedings ;  and  when  we've 
done  everything— really,  Mr.  Quirk !  if  one  were  apt  to  lose 
one's  temper,  it  would  be  to  see  such  a  thing  as  that  put  into 
possession  of  such  a  fortune." 

"  That  may  be,  Mr.  Gammon  ;  but  I  really— hem !— trust— 

I  ve— a  higher  feeling !— To  right— the  injured "  He  could 

get  no  further. 

"  Hem !  "  exclaimed  Gammon. 

The  partners  smiled  at  one  another.  A  touch,  or  an  at- 
tempted touch  at  disinterestedness  /—and  at  Quirk's  time  of 
life! 

"  But  he's  now  in  a  humor  for  training,  at  all  events— isn't 
he?  "exclaimed  Quirk— "we've  something  now  to  go  to  work 
upon— gradually. " 

"  Isn't  that  a  leaf  out  of  my  book,  Mr.  Quirk?  —isn't  that 
exactly  what " 

"Well,  well— what  does  it  signify?"  interrupted  Quirk 
rather  petulantly— "I've  got  a  crochet  that'll  do  for  us,  yet, 


TEN  THOUSAND  A-YEAE.  81 

about  the  matter  of  law,  and  make  all  right  and  tight— so  I'm 
gohrg  to  Mortmain. " 

"  I  ve  got  a  little  idea  of  my  own  of  that  sort,  Mr.  Quirk, 
said  Qammon— "  I've  got  an  extract  from  Co-Litt— .  I  can't 
imagine  how  either  of  them  could  have  missed  it  ;  and,  as 
Frankp\edge  dines  with  me  to-day,  we  shall  talk  it  all  over. 
But,  by  the  way,  Mr.  Quirk,  I  should  say,  with  all  deference, 
that  we'll  take  no  more  notice  of  this  fellow  till  we've  got 
some  screw  tight  enough " 

"  Why— all  that  may  be  very  well ;  but  you  see,  Gammon, 
the  fellow  seems  the  real  heir,  after  all— and  if  he  don't  get  it, 
no  one  can;  and  if  he  don't — we  don't!  eh?" 

"  There's  a  very  great  deal  of  force  in  that  observation,  Mr. 
Quirk, ''  said  Gammon  emphatically : — and,  tolerably  well 
pleased  with  one  another,  they  parted.  If  Quirk  might  be 
compared  to  an  old  file,  Gammon  was  the  oil!— so  the}7  got 
on,  in  the  main,  very  well  together.  It  hardly  signifies  what 
was  the  result  of  their  interview  with  their  two  conveyancers. 
They  met  the  next  morning  on  ordinary  business  •  and  as 
each  made  no  allusions  whatever  to  the  "crotchet "  of  the  day 
before,  it  may  be  safely  inferred  that  each  had  been  satisfied 
by  his  conveyancer  of  having  found  out  a  mare's  nest: 

"  I  think,  by  the  way,"  said  Mr,  Gammon  to  Mr.  Quirk, 
before  they  parted  on  the  previous  evening,  ''  it  may  be  as 
well,  all  things  considered,  to  acknowledge  the  receipt  of  the 
fellow's  note — eh  ?  —  Can't  do  any  harm,  you  know,  and  civ- 
ility costs  nothing — hem ! " 

"  The  very  thing  I  was  thinking  of,"  replied  Quirk,  as  he 
always  did  on  hearing  any  suggestion  from  Mr.  Gammon. 
So  by  that  night's  post  was  dispatched  ( post-paid )  the  follow- 
ing note  to  Mr.  Titmouse : — 

"  Messrs.  Quirk,  Gammon,  and  Snap  have  thepleasure  of  ac- 
knowledging the  receipt  of  Mr.  Titmouse's  polite  letter  of 
last  night's  date  ;  and  earnestly  beg  that  he  will  not  distress 
himself  about  the  little  incident  that  occurred  at  their  office 


for  not  losing  sight  of  his  interests,  to  the  best  of  their  ability ; 
obstructed  as  they  are,  hoAyever,  by  numerous  serious  diffi- 
culties. If  they  should  be  in  any  degree  hereafter  overcome, 
he  may  rest  assured  of  their  promptly  communicating  with 
him  ;and  till  then  they  trust  Mr.  T.  will  not  inconvenience 
himself,  by  calling  on,  or  writing  to  them. 

"  Saffron  Hill,  15th  July,  18—. 

"P.S. — Messrs.Q.  G.  and  S.  regret  to  hear  that  any  unpleas- 
antness has  arisen  ( Gammon  could  hardly  write  for  laugh- 
ing) between  Mr.  Titmouse  and  his  friend  Mr.  Hicklebagle 


82  TEN  THOUSAND  A-YEAR. 

who,  they  assure  him,  manifested  a  very  warm  interest  in 
behalf  of  Mr.  T. ,  and  conducted  himself  with  the  greatest 
propriety  on  the  occasion  of  his  calling  upon  Messrs.  Q.  G. 
and  S.  They  happened  at  that  moment  to  be  engaged  in  mat- 
ters of  the  highest  importance ;  which  will,  they  trust,  ex- 
plain any  appearance  ot  abruptness  they  might  have  exhibit- 
ed towards  that  gentleman.  Perhaps  Mr.  Titmouse  will  be 
so  obliging  as  to  intimate  as  much  to  Mr.  Hickerbag."  ^ 

There  was  an  obvious  reason  for  this  polite  allusion  to 
Huckaback,  Gammon  thought  it  very  possible  that  that 
gentleman  might  be  in  Mr.  Titmouse's  confidence,  and  ex- 
ercise a  powerful  influence  over  him  hereafter ;  and  which 
influence  Messrs.  Quirk,  Gammon,  and  Snap  might  find  it 
well  worth  their  while  to  secure  beforehand. 

The  moment  that  Titmouse,  with  breathless  haste,  had 
read  over  this  mollifying  document,  which  being  directed  to 
his  lodgings  correctly;  he  obtained  as  soon  as  he  had  reached 
his  lodgings  after  quitting  Mr,  Tag-rag,  about  ten  o'clock,  he 
hastened  to  his  friend  Huckaback.  That  gentleman  (who 
seemed  now  virtually  recognized  by  Messrs.  Quirk,  Gam- 
mon, and  Snap  a  Titmouse's  confidant)  shook  his  head 
ominously,  exclaiming—"  Blarney,  blarney !  "  and  a  bitter 
sneer  settled  on  his  disagreeable  features,  till  he  had  read 
down  to  the  postscript!  the  perusal  of  which  effected  a  sudden 
change  in  his  feelings.  He  declared,  with  a  great  oath,  that 
Messrs.  Quirk,  Gammon,  and  Snap  were  perfect  gentle- 
men," and  would  "do  the  right  thing,  Titmouse  might 
depend  upon  it ; "  an  assurance  which  greatly  cheered  Tit- 
mouse, to  whose  keen  discernment  it  never  once  occurred  to 
refer  Huckaback's  altered  tone  to  the  right  cause,  viz.  the 
lubricating  quality  of  the  postscript;  and  since  Titmouse 
did  not  allude  to  it,  no  more  did  Mr.  Huckaback,  although 
his  own  double  misnomer  stuck  a  little  in  his  throat.  So 
effectual,  indeed  had  been  that  most  skilful  postscript  upon 
the  party  whom  it  had  been  aimed  at  that  he  exerted  him- 
self unceasingly  to  revive  Titmouse's  confidence  in  Messrs, 
Quirk,  Gammon,  and  Snap  \  and  so  far  succeeded,  that  Tit- 
mouse returned  to  his  lodgings  at  a  late  hour,  a  somewhat 
happier,  if  not  a  wiser  man  than  he  had  left  them.  By 
the  time  however,  that  he  got  into  bed,  having  once  more 
spelled  over  the  note  in  question,  he  felt  as  despondent 
as  ever,  and  thought  that  Huckaback  had  not  known  what 
he  had  been  talking  about.  He  also  adverted  to  an  apparen  tly 
careless  allusion  by  Huckaback  to  the  injuries  which  had 
been  inflicted  upon  him  by  Titmouse  on  the  Wednesday 
night ;  and  which,  by  the  way,  Huckaback  determined  it 
should  be  no  fault  of  his  if  Titmouse  easily  forgot !  He  hardly 
knew  why— but  he  disliked  this  particularly.— Whom  had  he, 
however,  in  the  world,  but  Huckaback  ?  In  company  with 
him  alone,  Titmouse  felt  that  his  pent-up  feelings  could  dis- 
charge themselves.  Huckabaok,  had  certainly  a  wonderful 


TEN  THOUSAND'A-TEAE:  S3 

knack  of  keeping  up  Titmouse's  spirits,  whatever  cause  hie 
fancied  he  might  really  have  for  depression.  In  short,  he 
longed  for  the  Sunday  morning— ushering  in  a  day  of  rest 
and  sympathy.  Titmouse  would  indeed  then  have  to  look 
back  upon  an  agitating  and  miserable  week,  what  with  the 
dismal  upsetting  of  his  hopes,  in  the  manner  I  have  described, 
and  the  tyrannical  treatment  he  experienced  at  Tag-rag  and 
Co.'s. 

Mr.  Tag-rag  began,  at  length,  in  some  degree,  to  relax  his 
active  exertions  against  Titmouse,  simply  because  of  the 
trouble  it  gave  him  to  keep  them  up.  He  attributed  the 
pallid  cheek  and  depressed  manner  of  Titmouse  entirely  to 
the  discipline  which  had  been  inflicted  upon  him  at  the  shop, 
and  was  gratified  at  perceiv'ng  that  all  his  other  young  men 
seemed,  especially  in  his  presence,  to  have  imbibed  his  hatred 
of  Titmouse.  What  produced  in  Tag-rag  his  hatred  of  Tit- 
mouse'? Simply  what  had  taken  place  on  the  Monday.  Mr. 
Tag-rag's  dignify  and  power  had  been  doggedly  set  at  nought 
by  one  of  his  shopmen,  who  had  since  refused  to  make  the 
least  submission,  or  offer  any  kind  of  apology.  Such  conduct 
struck  at  the  root  of  subordination  in  his  establishment. 
Again,  there  is  perhaps  nothing  in  the  world  so  calculated  to 
enrage  a  petty  and  vulgar  mind  to  the  highest  pitch  of  malign- 
ity?  as  the  calm  persevering  defiance  of  an  inferior,  whom  it 
strives  to  despise,  while  it  is  only  hating,  which  it  at  the  same 
time  feels  to  be  the  case.  Tag-rag  now  and  then  looked  to- 
wards Titmouse  as  he  stood,  behind  the  counter,  as  if  he  could 
have  murdered  him.  Titmouse  attempted  once  or  twice, 
during  the  week,  to  obtain  a  situation  elsewhere,  but  in  vain. 
He  could  expect  no  character  from  Tag-rag;  and  when  the  10th 
of  August  should  have  arrived,  what  was  to  become  of  him  ? 
These  were  the  kind  of  thoughts  often  passing  through  his 
mind  during  the  Sunday,  which  he  and  Huckaback  spent  to- 
gether in  unceasing  conversation  on  the  one  absorbing  event 
of  the  last  week.  Titmouse,  poor  little  puppy,  had  dressed 
himself  with  just  as  much  care  as  usual ;  but  as  he  was  giving 
the  finishing  touches  at  his  toilet,  pumping  up  grievous  sighs 
every  half  minute,  the  sum  of  his  reflections  might  be  stated 
in  the  miserable  significance  of  a  quaint  saying  of  Poor 
Richard's — "  How  hard  is  it  to  make  an  empty  sack  stand 
upright ! " 

Although  the  sun  shone  as  vividly  and  beautifully  as  on 
the  preceding  Sunday,  to  Titmouse's  saddened  eye  there  seem- 
ed a  sort  of  gloom  everywhere.  Up  and  down  the  Park  he  and 
Huckaback  walked  towards  the  close  of  the  afternoon  ;  but 
Titmouse  had  not  so  elastic  a  strut  as  before.  He  felt  empty 
and  sinking.  Everybody  seemed  to  know  what  a  sad  pre- 
tender he  was ;  and  they  quitted  the  magic  circle  much 
earlier  than  had  been  usual  with  Titmouse.  What  with  the 
fatigue  of  a  long  day's  saunter,  the  vexation  of  having  had 
but  a  hasty,  inferior,  and  unrefresbing  meal,  which  did  not 


84  TEN  THOUSAND  A-YEAR. 

deserve  the  name  of  dinner,  and  their  unpleasant  tnoughte, 
both  seemed  depressed  as  they  walked  along  the  streets.  At 
length  they  arrived  at  the  open  doors  of  a  gloomy-looting 
building,  into  which  two  or  three  sad  and  prim-looking  people 
were  entering.  After  walking  a  few  paces  past  the  door— 
"  Do  you  know,  Huck,"  said  Titmouse,  stopping,  "  I Ye  often 
thought  that — that — there's  something  in  Kellgionr 

"  To  be  sure  there  is,  for  those  that  like  it— who  doubts  it  ? 
It's  all  very  well  in  its  place  no  doubt,"  replied  Huckaback 
with  much  surprise,  which  increased,  as  he  felt  himself  slowly 
being  swayed  around  towards  the  building  in  question. 
"But  what  of  that?" 

"  Oh,  nothing ;  but— hem !  hem  !  "  replied  Titmouse,  sink- 
ing his  voice  to  a  whisper — "  a  touch  of— religion — would  not 
be  so  much  amiss  just  now,  I  feel — uncommon  inclined  that 
way,  somehow." 

"  Religion's  all  very  well,  Titty,  dear!- -for  them  that  has 
much  to  be  thankful  for ;  but  devil  take  me !  what  have  either 
you  or  me  to  be " 

"  But,  Huck— how  do  you  know  but  we  might  get  some- 
thing to  be  thankful  for,  by  praying  ? — I've  often  heard  of 
great  things ;— Come." 

Huckaback  stood  for  a  moment  irresolute,  twirling  about 
his  cane,  and  looking  rather  distastefully  towards  the  dingy 
building.  *'  To  be  sure,"  he  said,  faintly.  Titmouse  drew 
him  nearer;  but  he  suddenly  started  back. — "  Xo!  oh,  'tis 
only  a  meeting  house,  Tit!  Curse  Dissenters,  how  I  hate 
'em !  No— I  won't  pray  in  a  meeting-house,  let  me  be  bad 
as  I  may.  Give  me  a  regular-like,  respectable  church,  with 
a  proper  steeple,  and  parson,  and  prayers,  and  all  that." 

Titmouse  secretly  acknowledged  the  force  of  these  ob- 
servations ;  and  the  intelligent  and  piously  disposed  couple, 
with  perhaps  a  just,  but  certainly  a  somewhat  sudden  regard 
for  orthodoxy,  were  not  long  before  they  had  found  their  way 
into  a  church  where  evening  service  was  being  performed. 
They  ascended  the  gallery  stair ;  and  seeing  no  reason  to  be 
ashamed  of  being  at  church,  down  they  both  went,  with  loud 
clattering  steps  and  a  bold  air,  into  the  very  central  seat  in 
the  front  of  the  gallery,  which  happened  to  be  vacant.  Tit- 
mouse paid  a  most  exemplary  attention  to  what  was  going 
on,  kneeling  sitting  and  standing  with  exact  propriety,  in  the 
proper  places,  joining  audibly  in  the  responses,  and  keeping 
his  eye  pretty  steadily  on  the  prayer-book,  which  he  found 
lying  there.  He  even  rebuked  Huckaback  for  whispering 
(during  one  of  the  most  solemn  part  of  the  service)  that 
"  there  was  a  pretty  gal  in  the  next  pew  !  "—He  thought  that 
the  clergyman  was  an  uncommon  fine  preacher,  and  said 
somethings  that  he  must  have  meant  for  him,  Titmouse,  in 
particular. 

"Curse  me,  Hucky ! "  said  he  heatedly,  as  soon  as  they 
had  quitted  the  church,  and  were  fairly  in  the  street- 


TEN  THOUSAND  A-YEAB.  85 

u  Curse  me  if — if — ever  I  felt  so  comfortable-like  in  my  mind 
before,  as  I  do  now — I'll  go  next  Sunday  again." 

"  Lard,  Tit,  you  don't  really  mean — it's  deuced  dull 
work ! " 

"  Hang  me  if  I  don't  though !  and  if  anything  should  come 
of  it — if  I  do  but  get  the  estate — (I  wonder,  now  where  Mr. 
Gammon  goes  to  church.  I  should  like  to  know ! — I'd  go  there 
regularly) — But  if  I  do  get  the  thing — you  see  if  I  don't " 

"Ah,  1  don't  know ;  It's  not  much  use  praying  for  money. 
Tit ;  I've  tried  it  mself ,  once  or  twice,  but  it  didn't  answer !  " 

"  I'll  take  my  oath  you  was  staring  at  the  gals  all  the  while, 

"  Ah,  Titty !  "  exclaimed,  Huckaback,  and  winked  his  eye, 
and  put  the  tip  of  his  forefinger  to  the  tip  of  his  nose,  and 
laughed. 

Titmouse  continued  in  what  he  doubtless  imagined  to  be 
a  devout  frame  of  mind,  for  several  minutes  after  quit- 
ting the  church.  But  close  by  the  aforesaid  church,  the 
devil  had  a  thriving  little  establishment,  in  the  shape  of  a 
cigar-shop ;  in  which  a  showily-dressed  young  Jewess  sat  be- 
hind the  counter,  right  underneath  a  glaring  gas-light — with 
a  thin  strip  of  greasy  black  velvet  across  her  forehead,  and 
long  ringlets  that  rested  on  her  shoulders— bandying  slang 
with  two  or  three  other  such  puppies  as  Titmouse  and 
Huckaback.  Our  friends  entered,  and  purchased  a  cigar  a- 
piece,  which  they  lit  on  the  spot ;  and  after  each  of  them  had 
exchanged  an  impudent  wink  with  the  Jewess,  out  they 
went,  puffing  away— all  the  remains  of  their  piety !  When 
they  had  come  to  the  end  of  their  cigars  they  parted,  each 
speeding  homeward.  Titmouse,  on  reaching  his  lodgings, 
sunk  into  profound  depression.  He  felt  an  awful  conviction 
that  his  visit  to  the  cigar-shop  had  entirely  spoilt  the  effects 
of  his  previous  attendance  at  the  church,  and  that,  if  so 
disposed,  he  might  now  sit  and  whistle  for  his  ten  thousand  a- 
year.  Thoughts  such  as  these  drove  him  nearly  distracted. 
If,  indeed,  he  had  foreseen  having  to  go  through  such  an- 
other week  as  the  one  just  over,  I  think  it  not  impossible 
that  before  the  arrival  of  the  ensuing  Sunday  Mr.  Tit- 
mouse  might  have  afforded  a  little  employment  to  that 
ancient  but  gloomy  functionary,  a  coroner  and  his  jury.  At 
that  time,  however  inquests  of  this  sort  were  matter-of-fact 
and  melancholy  affairs  enough  ;  which  I  doubt  not  would 
have  been  rather  a  dissuasive  from  suicide,  in  the  estimation 
of  one  who  might  be  supposed  ambitious  of  the  eclat  of  a 
modern  inquest;  where,  indeed,  such  strange  antics  are 
played  by  certain  new  performers  as  would  suffice  to  revive 
the  corpse,  (if  it  were  a  corpse  that  had  ever  had  a  spark  of 
sense  or  spirit  in  it,)  and  make  it  kick  the  coroner  out  of 
the  room.  But  to  one  of  so  high  an  ambition  as  Tittlebat 
Titmouse,  how  delighf  ul  would  it  not  have  been,  to  anticipate 
becoming  (what  had  been,  quite  impracticable  during  life) 


86  TEN  THOUSAND  A-YEAIt. 

the  object  of  public  attention  after  his  death— by  means  of 
a  flaming  dissertation  by  the  coroner  on  his  own  zeal  and 
spirit— the  nature  and  extent  of  his  rights,  powers,  and 
duties ; — when  high  doctors  are  browbeaten,  the  laws  set  at 
defiance,  and  public  decency  plucked  by  the  beard ,  and  the 
torn  and  bleeding  hearts  of  surviving  relatives  still  further 
agonized  by  an  exposure,  all  quivering  under  the  recent 
stroke,  to  the  gaping  vulgar !  Indeed,  I  sometimes  think  that 
the  object  of  certain  coroners,  nowadays,  is  twofold ;  first 
public— to  disgust  people  with  suicide,  by  showing  what 
horrid  proceedings  will  take  place  over  their  carcasses ;  and 
secondly,  private^-to  get  the  means  of  studying  anatomy  by 
post  mortems,  which  the  said  coroner  never  could  procure  in 
his  own  practice :  which  enables  us  to  account  for  some 
things  one  has  lately  seen,  viz.  that  if  a  man  come  to  his  death 
by  means  of  a  wagon  crushing  his  legs,  the  coroner  in- 
stitutes an  exact  examination  of  the  lungs  and  heart.  I  take 
it  to  be  getting  now  into  a  rule — the  propriety  whereof,  some 
people  think,  cannot  be  doubted — namely,  that  bodies  ought 
now  to  be  opened  only  to  prove  that  they  ought  not  to  have 
been  opened;  an  inquest  must  be  held,  in  order  to  demon- 
strate that  it  need  not  have  been  held,  except  that  certain 
fees  thereby  find  their  way  into  the  pocket  of  the  aforesaid 
coroner,  which  would  otherwise  not  have  done  so.  In  short, 
such  a  coroner  as  I  have  in  my  eye  may  be  compared  to  a 
great  ape  squatting  on  a  corpse,  furiously  chattering  and 
spitting  at  all  around  it ;  and  I  am  glad  that  it  hath  at  last 
had  wit  enough  first  to  shut  the  door  before  proceeding  to  its 
horrid  tricks. 

Touching,  by  the  way  the  moral  of  suicide,  it  is  a  way 
which  some  have  of  cutting  the  Gordian  knot  of  the  dif- 
ficulties of  life  ;  which  having  been  done,  possibly  the  very 
first  thing  that  is  made  manifest  to  the  spirit,  after  taking  its 
mad  leap  in  the  dark,  is— how  very  easily  the  said  knot 
might  have  been  UNTIED;  nay,  that  it  was  on  the  very  point 
of  being  untied,  if  the  impatient  spirit  had  stayed  only  a 
moment  longer:— a  dismal  discovery  which  may  excite 
ineffable  grief  at  the  folly  and  horror  of  the  crime  of  which 
such  spirit  has  been  guilty.  But  ah!  it  is  too  late!  The 
triumphant  fiend  has  secured  his  victim ! 

I  said  it  was  not  impossible  that  Mr.  Titmouse  might, 
under  the  circumstances  alluded  to,  have  done  the  deed 
which  has  called  forth  the  above  very  natural  and  profound 
reflections  ;  but  upon  the  whole,  it  is  hardly  prodadle,  for 
he  knew  that  by  doing  so  he  would  (first)  irreparably  injure 
society,  by  depriving  it  of  an  enlightened  and  invaluable 
member ;  (secondly,)  inflict  great  indignity  on  his  precious 
body,  of  which,  during  life,  he  had  slways  taken  the  most 
affectionate  care,  by  consigning  it  to  burial  in  a  cross  road, 
at  night  time  with  a  stake  run  through  it,*  and  moreover 

*  This  mode  of  treating  the  remains  of  a  felo  de  se,  was  (on  the  8th. 
July,  1823)  abolished  by  Act  of  Parliament. 


TEN  THOUSAND  A-TEAR.  87 

peril  the  little  soul  that  had  just  leaped  out  of  it,  by  not 
having  any  burial-service  said  over  his  aforesaid  remains ; 
and  (lastly)  lose  all  chance  of  enjoying  Ten  Thousand  a- 
Year— at  least  upon  earth.  I  own  I  wasa  little  start  led  (as  I 
dare  say  was  the  reader)  at  a  passage  of  mournful  significance 
in  Mr.  'Titmouse's  last  letter  to  Messrs.  Quirk,  Gammon, 
and  Snap,  viz. — "  How  full  of  trouble  I  am,  often  thinking 
of  death,  which  is  the  end  of  everything ;  "  but  on  carefully 
considering  the  context,  I  am  disposed  to  think  that  the 
whole  was  only  a  device  of  Titmouse's,  either  to  rouse  the 
fears,  or  stimulate  the  feelings,  or  excite  the  hopes,  of  the 
three  arbiters  of  his  destiny  to  whom  it  was  addressed.  Mr. 
Gammon,  he  thought,  might  be  thereby  moved  to  pity ; 
while  Mr.  Quirk  would  probably  be  operated  upon  by  fears, 
lest  the  sad  contingency  pointed  at  might  deprive  the  house 
of  one  who  would  richly  repay  their  exertions  ;  and  by  hopes 
of  indefinite  advantage,  if  they  could  by  any  means  prevent 
its  happening.  I  have  often  questioned  Titmouse  on  the 
subject,  but  lie  would  only  wink  his  eye,  and  say  that  he 
"  knew  ichat  to  be  at "  as  well  as  any  one  !  That  these  gentle- 
men really  did  keenly  scrutinize,  and  carefully  weigh  every 
expression  in  the  letter,  ridiculous  as  it  was,  and  contemptible 
as,  I  fear,  it  showed  its  writer  to  be,  is  certain ;  but  it  did 
not  occur  to  them  to  compare  with  it,  at  least,  the  spirit  and 
intention  of  their  own  answer  to  it.  Did  the  latter  docu- 
ment contain  less  cunning  and  insincerity,  because  it  was 
couched  in  somewhat  superior  phraseology?  They  could 
conceal  their  selfish  and  over-reaching  designs,  while  poor  Tit- 
mouse expose  all  his  little  mean-mindedness  and  hypocrisy, 
simply  because  he  had  not  learned  how  to  conceal  it  effectual- 
ly. 'Twas  indeed  a  battle  for  the  very  same  object,  but 
between  unequal  combatants.  Each  was  trying  to  take  the 
other  in.  If  Messrs.  Quirk,  Gammon,  and  Snap  despised  and 
loathed  the  man  to  whom  they  exhibited  such  anxious  court- 
tesy  Titmouse  hated  and  feared  those  whom  his  interests 
compelled  him  for  a  while  to  conciliate.  Was  there,  in  fact,  a 
pin  to  choose  between  them — except,  perhaps,  that  Titmouse 
was,  in  a  manner,  excused  by  his  necessities  ? — but  in  the 
meanwhile  his  circumstances  were  becoming  utterly  des- 
perate. He  continued  to  endure  great  suffering  at  Mr. 
Tag-rag's  during  the  day— the  constant  butt  of  the  ridicule 
and.  insult  of  his  amiable  companions,  and  the  victim  of 
his  employer's  vile  and  vulgar  spirit  of  hatred  and  oppression. 
His  spirit,  (such  as  it  was,)  in  short,  was  very  nearly  broken. 
Though  he  seized  every  opportunity  that  offered,  to  inquire 
for  another  situation,  he  was  unsuccessful ;  for  all  whom 
he  applied  to  spoke  of  the  strict  character  they  should  require, 
"  before  taking  a  new  hand  into  their  establishment."  His 
occupation  at  nights,  after  quitting  the  shop,  was  two  old 
only— either  to  call  upon  Huckaback,  (whose  sympothy  how- 
ever, he  was  exhausting  rapidly,)  or  solace  his  feelings  by 


88  TEN  ZHOUSAND  A-TEAR. 

walking  down  to  Saffronllill,  and  lingering  about  the  closed 
Oilice  of  Messrs.  Quirk,  Gammon,  and  Snap— there  was  a 
kind  of  gratification  even  in  that !  He  once  or  twice  felt 
flustered  even  on  catching  a  gimpse  of  the  old  housekeeper 
returning  from  some  little  errand.  How  he  would  have  re- 
joiced to  get  into  her  good  graces,  and  accompany  her  into 
even  the  kitchen — when  he  would  be  on  the  premises  at 
least,  and  conversing  with  one  of  the  establishment  of  those 
who  he  believed  could,  with  a  stroke  of  their  pens,  turn 
this  wilderness  of  a  world  into  a  paradise  for  him !  But  he 
dared  not  make  any  overtures  in  that  quarter,  for  fear  of 
their  getting  to  the  notice  of  the  dreaded  Messrs.  Quirk, 
Gammon,  and  Snap. 

At  length,  no  more  than  three  or  four  shillings  stood  be- 
tween him  and  utter  destitution  ;  and  the  only  person  in  the 
world  whom  he  could  apply  to  for  even  the  most  trivial  assist- 
ance, was  Huckaback— whom,  however,  he  knew  to  be 
scarcely  any  better  off  than  himself ;  and  whom,  moreover, 
he  felt  to  be  treating  him  more  and  more  coldly,  as  the  week 
wore  on  without  his  hearing  of  any  the  least  tidings  from 
Saffron  Hill.  Huckaback  evidently  felt  now  scarcely  any 
interest  or  pleasure  in  the  visits  of  his  melancholy  friend,  and 
was  plainly  disinclined  to  talk  about  his  affairs.  At  length 
he  quite  turned  up  his  nose,  with  disgust,  whenever  Titmouse 
took  out  the  well-worn  note  of  Messrs.  Quirk,  Gammon,  and 
Snap,  which  was  almost  dropping  in  pieces  with  being  con- 
stantly carried  about  in  his  pocket,  taken  in  and  out,  and 
folded  and  unfolded,  for  the  purpose  of  conning  over  its  con- 
tents, as  if  there  might  yet  linger  in  it  some  hitherto  undis- 
covered source  of  consolation.  Poor  Titmouse,  therefore, 
looked  at  it  on  every  such  occasion  with  as  eager  and  vivia 
an  interest  as  ever ;  but  it  was  glanced  at  by  Huckaback 
Avith  a  half-averted  eye,  and  a  cold,  drawling,  yawning  "  Ya — 
a— as — I  see— I — dare— say ! "  As  his  impressions  of  Titmouse's 
bright  prospects  were  thus  being  rapidly  effaced,  his  smart- 
ing recollection  of  the  drubbing  he  had  received  became  dis- 
tincter  and  more  frequent ;  his  feelings  of  resentment  more 
lively,  and  not  the  less  so,  because  the  expression  of  them 
had  been  stifled,  (while  he  had  considered  the  star  of  Tit- 
mouse to  be  in  the  ascendant,)  till  the  time  for  setting  them 
into  motion  and  action  had  gone  by.  In  fact  the  presence  of 
Titmouse,  suggesting  such  thoughts  and  recollections,  be- 
came intolerable  to  Huckaback ;  and  Titmouse's  perceptions 
(dull  as  they  naturally  were,  but  a  little  quickened  by  recent 
suftermg)  gave  him  more  and  more  distinct  notice  "of  this 
circumstance,  at  the  precise  time  when  he  meditated  apply- 
ing for  the  loan  of  a  few  shillings.  These  feelings  made  him  as 
humble  towards  Huckaback,  and  as  patient  of  his  increasing 
rudeness  and  ill-humor,  as  he  felt  abject  towards  Messrs. 
Quirk,  Gammon,  and  Snap ;  for,  unless  he  could  succeed  in 
wringing  some  trifling  loan  from  Huckaback,  (if  he  really 


TEN  THOUSAND  A-TEAB.  89 

had  it  in  his  power  to  advance  him  anything,)  he  could  not 
conjecture  what  was  to  become  of  him.  Various  faint  but 
unadroit  hints  and  feelers  of  his  had  been  thrown  away ;  for 
Huckaback  either  did  not,  or  could  not,  comprehend  them. 
But  at  length  a  sudden  and  fearful  pressure  compelled  him 
to  speak  out.  Gripe,  the  collector,  called  one  morning  for 
the  poor's  rates  due  from  Mrs.  Squallop,  (Titmouse's  land- 
lady,) and  cleaned  her  out  of  almost  every  penny  of  ready 
money  which  she  had  by  her.  This  threw  the  good  woman 
upon  her  resources,  to  replenish  her  empty  pocket— and  down 
she  came  upon  Titmouse— or  rather,  up  she  went  to  him  ; 
for  his  heart  sunk  within  him  one  night  on  his  return  from 
the  shop,  having  only  just  taken  off  his  hat  and  lit  his  candle, 
as  he  heard  the  fat  old  termagant's  well-known  heavy  step 
ascending  the  stairs,  and  approaching  nearer  and  nearer  to 
his  door.  Her  loud  imperative  single  knock  vibrated  through 
his  heart,  and  he  was  ready  to  drop. 

"  Oh,  Mrs.  Squallop !  How  d'ye  do.  Mrs.  Squallop  ?  "  com- 
menced Titmouse  faintly,  when  he  had  opened  the  door ; 
"  Won't  you  take  a  chair  ? "  offering  to  the  panting  dame 
almost  the  only  chair  he  had. 

"  No— I  a'n't  come  to  stay,  Mr.  Titmouse,  because  d'ye  see 
incoorse  you've  got  a  pound,  at  least  ready  for  me,  as  you 
promised  long  ago — and  never  more  welcome ;  there's  old 
Gripe  been  here  to-day,  and  his  hodious  rates— ('drat  the  poor, 
say  I !  them  as  can't  work  should  starve !— rates  is  a  robbery !) 
— but  howsomdever  he's  cleaned  me  out  to-day  ;  so,  in  coorse,  I 
come  up  to  you.  Got  it  ?  " 

"  I— I— I—'  pon  my  life.  Mrs.  Squallop,  I'm  uncommon 
sorry — 

"  Oh,  bother  your  sorrow,  Mr.  Titmouse  !— out  with  the 
needful,  for  I  can't  stop  palavering  here." 

"  I— I  can't,  so  help  me !  "  gasped  Titmouse,  with  the 

calmness  of  desperation. 

"  You  can't !  And  marry,  sir,  why  not,  may  I  make  bold  to 
ask  ?  "  inquired  Mrs.  Squallop  after  a  moment's  pause,,  striv* 
ing  to  choke  down  her  rage. 

"  P'r'aps  you  can  get  blood  out  of  a  stone,  Mrs.  Squallop  ; 
it's  what  I  can't,"  replied  Titmouse,  striving  to  screw  his 
courage  up  to  the  sticking  place  to  encounter  one  who  was 
plainly  bent  upon  mischief.  "  I've  got  two  shillings— there 
they  are."  throwing  them  on  the  table  ;  "  and  cuss  me  if  I've 
another  rap  in  the  world ;  there,  ma'am !  " 

"  You're  a  liar,  then,  that's  flat ! '  exclaimed  Mrs,  Squallop, 
slapping  her  hand  upon  the  table,  with  a  violence  that  made 
the  candle  quiver  on  it,  and  almost  fall  down.  "  You  have  the 
himperance^  said  she,  commencing  the  address  she  had  been 

Kreparing  in  her  own  mind  ever  since  Mr.  Gripe  had  quitted 
er  house,  "  to  stand  there  and  tell  me  you've  got  nothing  in 
the  world  but  them  two  shillings  !    Heugh !  Out  on  you,  you 
oudacious  fellow  !— you  jack-a-dandy !     You  tell  me  you 


90  TEN  THOUSAND  A-YEAR. 

haven't  got  more  then  them  two  shillings,  and  yet  turns  out 
every  Sunday  morning  of  your  life  like  a  lord,  with  your  pins, 
and  your  rings,  and  your  chains,  and  your  tine  coat,  and  your 
gloves,  and  your  spurs,  and  your  dandy  cane— ough  !  you 
whipper-snapper !  You're  a  cheat— you're  a  swindler,  jack-a- 
dandy !  Youfre  the  contempt  of  the  whole  court,  you  are, 
you  jack-a-dandy !  You've  got  all  my  rent  on  your  back,  and 
have  had  every  Sunday  for  three  months,  you  cheat !— you  low 
fellow !  you  ungrateful  chap !  You're  a-robbing  the  -widow 
and  fatherless  !  Look  at  me,  and  my  six  fatherless  children 
down  there,  you  good-for-nothing,  nasty,  proud  puppy  !- 
eugh  !  it  makes  me  sick  to  see  you.  You  dress  yourself  out 
like  my  lord  mayor !  You've  bought  a  gold  chain  with  my 
rent,  you  rascally  cheat !  You  dress  yourself  out  ?— Ha,  ha ! 
— you're  a  nasty,  mean-looking,  humpty,  clumpty,  carroty- 
headed— 

"  You'd  better  not  say  that  again  Mrs.  Squallop,"  quoth 
Titmouse,  with  a  fierce  glance. 

"  Not  say  it  again !— ha,  ha !  Hoighty-toighty,  carroty:hair- 
ed  jack-a-dandy !— Why,  you  hop-o-my-thumb !  d'ye  think  I 
won't  say  whatever  I  choose,  and  in  my  own  house  ?  You're 
a  Titmouse  by  name  and  by  nature ;  there  a'n't  a  cockroach 
crawling  downstairs  that  a'n't  more  respectable-like  and 
better  behaved  than  you.  You're  a  himpudent  cheat,  and 
dandy,  and  knave,  and  a  liar,  and  red-haired  rascal — and  that 
in  your  teeth !  Ough  !  Your  name  stinks  in  court.  You're 
a-taking  of  everybody  in  as  will  trust  you  to  a  penny's  amount. 
There's  poor  old  Cox,  the  tailor,  with  a  sick  wife  and  children, 
whom  you've  cheated  this  many  months,  all  of  his  not  having 
spirit  to  summons  you !  But  ftt  set  him  upon  you  ;  you  see 
if  I  don't— and  I'll  have  my  own,  too,  or  I  wouldn't  give  that 
for  the  laws ! "  shouted  Mrs.  Squallop,  at  the  same  time  snap- 

;ing  her  fingers  in  his  face,  and  then  pausing  for  breath  after 
er  eloquent  invective. 

"Now,  what  is  the  use  ,"  said  Titmouse  gently,  being  com- 
pletely cowed — "  now,  what  good  can  it  do  to  go  on  in  this 
way,  Mrs.  Squallop  ?  " 

"  Missus  me  no  missus,  Mr.  Titmouse,  but  pay  me  my  rent, 
you  jack-a-dandy !  You've  got  my  rent  on  your  back  and  on 
your  little  finger ;  and  I'll  have  it  off  you  before  I've  done 
with  you,  I  warrant  you.  I'm  your  landlady,  and  I'll  have 
you  up ;  I'll  have  old  Thumbscrew  here  the  first  thing  in  the 
morning,  and  distrain  everything,  and  you,  too,  you  jackdaw, 
if  any  one  would  buy  you,  which  they  wont '  I'l  nave  my 
rent  at  last :  I've  been  too  easy  with  you  you  ungrateful  chap ; 
for,  mark,  even  Gripe  this  morning  says'a  Haven't  you  a  gen- 
tleman lodger  up  above  ?  get  him  to  pay  you  nour  own,  says 
he ;  and  so  I  will.  I'm  sick  of  all  this,  and  I'll  have  my  rights. 
Here's  my  son,  Jem,  a  far  better-looking  chap  than  you,  though 
he  hasn't  got  hair  like  a  sandy  mop  all  under  his  chin,  and 
he's  obligated  for  to  work  from  one  week's  end  to  another, 


i; 


TEN  THOUSAND  A-YEAB.  91 


though  I  know  there's  nothing  in  you !  But  1 11  try  to  get 
your  fine  coats,  and  spurs,  and  trousers,  your  chains  and 
pins,  and  make  something  of  them  before  I've  done  with  you, 
you  jack-a-dandy !  " — and  the  virago  shook  her  fist  at  him, 
looking  as  though  she  had  not  yet  uttered  even  half  that  was 
in  her  heart  towards  him. 

[Alas,  alas,  unhappy  Titmouse,  much-enduring  son  of  sor- 
row! I  perceive  that  you  now  feel  the  sharpness  of  an  angry 
female  tongue  ;  and  indeed  to  me,  not  in  the  least  approving 
of  the  many  coarse  and  heart-splitting  expressions  which  she 
uses,  it  seems,  nevertheless,  that  she  is  not  very  far  off  the 
mark  in  much  that  she  hath  said ;  for  in  truth  in  your  con- 
duct there  is  not  a  little  that  to  me,  piteously  inclined  towards 
you  as  I  am,  yet  appeareth  obnoxious  to  the  edge  of  this  wo- 
man's reproaches.  But  think  not,  O  bewildered  and  not- 
with-sufficieiit-distinctness-discernmg-the  -  nature  -  of -things 
Titmouse !  that  she  hath  only  a  sharp  and  bitter  tongue.  In 
thiswoman  behold  a  mother,  and  it  maybe  that  she  will  soften 
before  you,  who  have  plainly,  as  I  hear,  neither  father  nor 
mother.  Oh  me !] 

Titmouse  trembled  violently;  his  lips  quivered;  and  the 
long  pent-up  tears  forced  their  way  at  length  over  his  eyelids 
and  fell  fast  down  his  cheeks. 

"  Ah,  you  may  well  cry  !  you  may  !  But  it's  too  late  ! 
it's  my  turn  to  cry  now !  Don't  you  think  that  I  feel  for  my 
own  flesh  and  blood,  that  is  my  six  children  ?  And  isn't 
what's  mine  theirs  ?  And  aren't  you  keeping  the  fatherless 
out  of  their  own  ?  It's  too  bad  of  you  it  is  !  and  you  know 
it  is, "  continued  Mrs.  Squallop,  vehemently. 

"  They've  got  a  mother— a  kind — good — mother— to  take  — 
care  of  them,"  Titmouse  sobbed ;  "  but  there's  been  no  one 
in  the — the — world  that  cares  a  straw  for  me — this  twenty — 
years  ! "  He  fairly  wept  aloud. 

"  Well,  then,  more's  the  pity  for  you.  If  you  had,  they 
wouldn't  have  let  you  make  such  a  puppy  of  yourself— and 
at  your  land  lady's  expense,  too.  You  know  you're  a  fool," 
said  Mrs.  Squallop,  dropping  her  voice  a  little :  for  she  was 
a  MOTHER  after  all,and  she  knew  that  what  poor  Titmouse  had 
lust  stated  was  quite  true.  She  tried  hard  to  feed  the  fire  of 
her  wrath,  by  forcing  into  her  thoughts  every  aggravating 
topic  against  Titmouse  that  she  could  think  of ;  but  it  became 
every  moment  harder  and  harder  to  do  so,  for  she  was 
consciously  softening  rapidly  towards  the  weeping  and  miser- 
able little  object,  on  whom  she  had  been  heaping  such 
violent  and  bitter  abuse.  He  was  a  great  fool,  to  be  sure— he 
was  very  fond  of  fine  clothes— he  knew  no  better— he  had, 
however,  paid  his  rent  well  enough  till  lately— he  was  a  very 
quiet,  well-disposed  lodger,  for  all  she  had  known — he  had 
given  her  youngest  child  a  pear  not  long  ago.  Really, 
thought  Mrs.  Squallop,  I  may  nave  gone  a  leetle  too  far. 


92  TEN  THOUSAND  A-YEAR. 

"  Come— it  a'n't  no  use  crying  in  this  way.  It  won't  put 
money  into  your  pocket,  nor  my  rent  into  mine.  You  know 
you've  wronged  me,  and  I  must  be  paid,"  she  added,  but  in 
a  still  lower  tone.  She  tried  to  cough  away  a  certain  rising 
disagreeable  sensation  about  her  throat,  that  kept  increasing: 
for  Titmouse,  having  turned  his  back  to  hide  the  extent  of 
his  emotions,  seemed  half-choked  with  suppressed  sobs, 
i  "  So  you  won't  speak  a  w;ord— not  a  word— to  the  woman 
you've  injured  so  much  ?  "  inquired  Mrs.  Squallop,  trying  to 
assume  a  harsh  tone  ;  but  her  eyes  were  a  little  obstructed 
with  tears. 

"  1— I— can't  speak,"  sobbed  Titmouse— "I — I  feel  ready  to 
drop— everybody  hates  me"— here  he  paused ;  and  for  some 
moments  neither  spoke.  "  I've  been  kept  on  my  legs  the 
whole  day  about  the  town  by  Mr.  Tag-rag,  and  had  no  dinner. 
I— I— wisn  I  was  dead!  I  do !  — you  may  take  all  I  have— here 
it  is,"  continued  Titmouse,  with  his  foot  pushing  towards 
Mrs.  Squallop  the  old  hair  trunk  that  contained  all  his  little 
finery.  "  I  sna'n't  want  them  much  longer,  for  I'm  turned 
out  of  my  situation." 

This  was  too  much  for  Mrs.  Squallop,  and  she  was  obliged 
to  wipe  her  full  eyes  with  the  corner  of  her  apron,  without 
saying  a  word.  Her  heart  smote  her  for  the  misery  she  had 
inflicted  on  one  who  seemed  quite  broken  down.  Pity 
suddenly  flew,  fluttering  his  wings — soft — dove !— into  her 
heart,  and  put  to  flight  in  an  instant  all  her  enraged  feelings. 
"  Come,  Mr.  Titmouse,"  said  she,  in  quite  an  altered  tone, 
"  never  mind  me  ;  I'm  a  plain  spoken  woman  enough,  I  dare 
say— and  often  say  more  than  I  mean— for  I — I  know  I 
a'n't  over  particular  when  my  blood's  up— but— lord  !— I— 
I  wouldn't  hurt  a  hair  of  your  head,  poor  chap !— for  all 
I've  said— no,  not  for  double  the  rent  you  owe  me.  Come ! 
don't  go  on  so,  Mr  Titmouse— what's  the  use  ?— it's  all  quite 
—over— I'm  so  sorry— Lud  !  if  I'd  really  thought  "—she  al- 
most sobbed— "  you'd  been  so — so— why,  I'd  have  waited 
till  to-mprrow  night  before  I'd  said  a  word.  Bat,  Mr.  Tit- 
mouse, since  you  haven't  had  any  dinner,  won't  you  have  a 
mouthful  of  something— a  bit  of  bread  and  cheese  ?— I'll  soon 
fetch  you  up  a  bit  and  a  drop  of  beer— we've  just  had  it  in 
for  our  suppers." 

"  No,  thank  you— I  can't— I  can't  eat !  "  sobbed  Titmouse. 

"Oh,  bother  it,  but  you  shall!  I'll  g9  down  and  fetch  it 
up  in  half-a-minute,  as  sure  as  my  name  is  Squallop !  "  And 
out  of  the  room  and  downstairs  she  bustled,  glad  of  a  moment 
to  recover  herself. 

"  Lord-a-mercy !"  said  she,  on  entering  her  room,  to  her 
eldest  daughter  and  a  neighbor  who  had  just  come  in  to 
supper— and  while  she  hastily  cut  a  thick  hunch  of  bread, 
and  a  good  slice  of  cheese— "there  I've  been  a-rating  that 
poor  little  chap,  up  at  the  top  room,  (my  dandy  lodger,  you 
know),  like  anything— and  I  really  don't  think  he's  had  a 


TEN  THOUSAND  A-YEAR.  93 

morsel  of  victuals  in  his  belly  this  precious  day ;  and  I've 
made  him  cry,  poor  soul !  as  if  his  heart  would  break.  Pour 
us  out  half  a  pint  of  that  beer,  Sally — a  good  half  pint,  mind ! 
—I'm  going  to  take  it  upstairs  directly,  I've  gone  a  deal  too 
far  with  him  I  do  think ;  but  it's  all  of  that  nasty  old 
Gripe ;  I've  been  wrong  all  the  day  through  it !  How  I  hate 
the  sight  of  old  Gripe  !  What  odious  looking  people  they  do 
get  to  collect  the  rates  and  taxes,  to  be  sure  ! — Poor  chap," 
she  continued,  as  she  wiped  out  a  plate  with  her  apron,  and 
put  into  it  the  bread  and  cheese,  with  a  knife—"  he  offered 
me  a  chair  when  I  went  in,  so  uncommon  civil-like,  it  took 
a  good  while  before  I  could  get  myself  into  the  humor  to 
give  {(him  as  I  wanted.  And  he's  no  father  nor  mother,  (half 
of  which  has  happened  to  you,  Sal,  and  the  rest  will  happen 
one  of  these  days,  you  know !)  and  he's  not  such  a  very  bad 
lodger,  after  all,  though  he  does  get  a  little  behind  hand  now 
and  then,  and  though  he  turns  out  every  Sunday  like  a  lord, 
poor  fool— as  my  poor  husband  used  to  say,  '  with  a  shining 
back  and  empty  belly.' " 

"  But  that's  no  reason  why  honest  people  should  be  kept 
out  of  their  own,  to  feed  his  pride,"  interposed  her  neighbor, 
a  skinny  old  widow,  who  had  never  had  chick  nor  child,  and 
was  always  behind  hand  with  her  own  rent ;  but  whose  effects 
were  not  worth  distraining  upon.  "  I'd  get  hold  of  some  of  his 
fine  crincum-crancums  and  gimcracks,  for  security  like,  if  I 
were  you.  I  would,  indeed. 

"  Why— no,  poor  soul— I  don't  hardly  like ;  he's  a  vain 
creature,  and  puts  everything  he  can  on  his  back,  to  be  sure  ; 
but  he  a'n' t  quite  a  rogue,  neither." 

"  Ah,  ha,  Mrs.  Squallop — you're  such  a  simple  soul !— Won't 
my  fine  gentleman  make  off  with  his  finery  after  to-night  ?  " 
Well,  I  shouldn't  have  thought  it !  To  be  sure  he  may ! 
Really,  there  can't  be  much  harm  in  asking  him  (in  a  proper 
kind  of  way)  to  deposit  one  of  his  fine  things  with  me,  by 
way  of  security— that  ring  of  his,  you  know— eh  ?— Well,  I'll 
try  it  anyhow,"  said  Mrs.  Squallop,  as  she  set  off  upstairs. 

"  I  know  what  /"should  do,  if  so  be  he  was  a  lodger  of  mine, 
that's  all,"  said  her  visitor,  (as  Mrs.  Squallop  quitted  the 
room,)  vexed  to  find  their  supper  so  considerably  and  unex- 
pectedly diminished,  especially  as  to  the  pot  of  porter,  which 
she  strongly  suspected  would  not  be  replenished. 

"  There,"  said  Mrs.  Squallop,  setting  down  on  the  table 
what  she  had  brought  for  Titmouse,  "  there's  a  bit  of  supper 
for  you  ;  and  you're  welcome  to  it,  I'm  sure,  Mr.  Titmouse." 

"  Thank  you",  thank  you— I  can't  eat,"  said  he,  casting,  how- 
ever, upon  the  victuals  a  hungry  eye,  which  belied  what  he 
said,  while  in  his  heart  he  longed  to  be  left  alone  with  them 
for  about  three  minutes. 

u  Come,  don't  be  ashamed — fall  to  work — it's  good  whole- 
some victuals,"  said  she,  lifting  the  table  near  to  the  edge  of 
the  bed,  on  the  side  of  which  he  was  sitting,  and  taking  up 


94  TEN  THOUSAND  A-YEAE. 

the  two  shillings  lying  on  the  table—"  and  capital  good  beer, 
I  warrant  me ;  you'll  sleep  like  a  top  after  it. ' 

"  You're  uncommon  kind,  Mrs.  Squallop ;  but  I  sha'n't  get 
a  wink  of  sleep  to-night  for  thinking — 

"  Oh,  bother  your  thinking !  Let  me  begin  to  see  you  eat 
a  bit.  Well,  I  suppose  you  don't  like  to  eat  and  drink  before 
me,  so  I'll  go."  [Here  arose  a  sudden  conflict  in  the  good 
woman's  mind,  whether  or  not  she  would  act  on  the  sugges- 
tion which  had  been  put  into  her  head  down-stairs.  She 
was  on  the  point  of  yielding  to  the  impulse  of  her  own  good- 
natured,  though  coarse  feelings ;  but  at  last—]  "  I—I—dare 
say,  Mr.  Titmouse,  you  mean  what's  right  and  straightfor- 
ward," she  stammered. 

"  Yes,  Mrs  Squallop— you  may  keep  those  two  shillings ; 
they're  the  last  farthing  I  have  left  in  the  whole  world." 

"  No— hem !  hem  ! — ahem !  I  was  just  suddenly  a-thinking 
— now  can't  you  guess,  Mr  Titmouse  ?  " 

"  What,  Mrs.  Squallop  ?  "  inquired  Titmouse,  meekly  but 
anxiously. 

"  Why — suppose  now — if  it  were  only  to  raise  ten  shillings 
with  old  Balls,  round  the  corner,  on  one  of  those  fine  things  of 
yours— your  ring,  say."  [Titmouse's  heart  sank  within  him .] 

Well,  well — never  mind — don't  fear,"  said  Mrs  Squallop. 
observing  him  suddenly  turn  pale  again.  "  I — I  only  thought 
— but  never  mind !  It  don't  signify— good  night !  we  can  talk 
about  that  to-morrow — good-night — a  good-night's  rest,  Mr. 
Titmouse  !  "  and  the  next  moment  he  heard  her  heavy  step 
descending  the  stairs.  Several  minutes  had  elapsed  before 
he  could  recover  from  the  agitation  into  which  he  had  been 
thrown  by  her  last  proposal ;  but  within  ten  minutes  of  her 
quitting  the  room,  there  stood  before  him,  on  the  table,  an 
empty  plate  and  jug. 


CHAPTER  IV. 

"  The  beast !  the  fat  old  toad !  "  thought  he,  the  instant 
that  he  had  finished  masticating  what  had  been  supplied  to 
him  by  real  charity  and  good-nature, — "  the  vulgar  wretch  I—- 
the nasty  canting  old  hypocrite  !— I  saw  what  she  was  driv- 
ing at  all  the  while !  She  had  her  eyes  on  my  ring!  She'd 
have  me  pawn  it  at  old  Balls's— ha,  ha !— Catch  me !  that's 
all !— Seven  shillings  a  week  for  this  nasty  hole !— I'll  be 
bound  I  pay  nearly  half  the  rent  of  the  whole  house— the  old 
cormorant  .'—out  of  what  she  gets  from  me !  How  I  hate  her ! 
More  than  half  my  salary  goes  into  her  greasy  pocket !  Cuss 
me  if  I  couldn't  have  kicked  her  down-stairs—porter,  bread 
and  cheese,  and  all— while  she  was  standing  canting  there— A 
snivelling  old  beldam !— Take  my  ring !  !  Lord !— "  Here  he 
began  to  undress.  "  Ha !  I'm  up  to  her  j  she'll  be  coming  here 


TEN  THOUSAND  A-YEAE.  95 

tomorrow,  with  that  devil  Thumbscrew,  to  distrain,  I'll  be 
sworn.  Well— I'll  take  care  of  these  anyhow;  "and  kneel- 
ing down  and  unlocking  his  trunk,  he  took  out  of  it  his  guard- 
chain,  breast-pin,  studs,  and  ring,  carefully  folded  them  up 
in  paper,  and  depositing  them  in  his  trousers'  pockets,  resolv- 
ed henceforth  their  nightly  resting-place  should  be— under 
his  pillow ;  while  during  the  day  they  should  accompany  his 
person  whithersoever  he  went.  Next  he  bethought  himself  of 
the  two  or  three  important  papers  to  which  Mr.  Gammon  had 
referred :  and,  witn  tremulous  eagerness,  read  them  over 
once  or  twice,  but  without  being  able  to  extract  from  them 
the  slightest  clue  to  their  real  character  and  bearing.  Then 
he  folded  them  up  in  a  half-sheet  of  writing-paper,  which  he 
proceeded  to  stitch  carefully  beneath  the  lining  of  his  waist- 
coat ;  after  which  he  blew  out  his  slim  candle,  and  with  a 
heavy  sigh  got  into  bed.  For  some  moments  after  he  had 
blown  out  the  candle  did  the  image  of  it  remain  on  his  aching 
and  excited  retina  :  and  just  so  long  did  the  thoughts  of  ten 
thousand  a-year  dwell  on  his  fancy,  fading,  however,  quickly 
away  amid  the  thickening  gloom  of  doubts,  and  fears,  and 
miseries,  which  oppressed  him.  There  he  lies,  stretched  on 
his  bed,  a  wretched  figure,  lying  011  his  breast,  his  head  buried 
beneath  his  feverish  arms.  Anon,  he  turns  round  upon  his 
back,  stretches  his  wearied  limbs  to  their  uttermost,  folds 
his  arms  on  his  breast,  then  buries  them  beneath  the  pillow, 
under  his  head-  Now  he  turns  on  his  right  side,  then  on  his 
left — presently  he  starts  up,  and  with  muttered  curse  shakes 
his  little  pillow,  flinging  it  down  angrily.  He  cannot  sleep — he 
cannot  rest — he  cannotkeep  still.  Bursting  with  irritability, 
he  gets  out  of  bed,  and  steps  to  the  window,  which  opening 
wide,  a  slight  gush  of  fresh  air  cools  his  hot  face  for  a 
moment  or  two.  His  wearied  eye  looks  up  and  beholds  the 
moon  shining  overhead  in  cold  splendor,  turning  the 
clouds  to  gold  as  they  flit  past  her,  and  shedding  a  softened 
lustre  upon  the  tired  roofs  and  irregular  chimney-pots — the 
only  objects  visible  to  him.  No  sound  is  heard,  but  occa- 
sionally the  dismal  cry  of  a  disappointed  cat,  the  querulous 
voice  of  the  watchman,  and  the  echo  of  the  rumbling  hubbub 
of  Oxford  Street.  O  miserable  Titmouse  !  of  what  avail  is 
it  for  thee  thus  to  fix  thy  sorrowful  lack-lustre  eye  upon  the 

cold  Queen  of  Night ! 

******** 

At  that  moment  there  happened  to  be  also  gazing  at  the 
same  glorious  object,  but  at  some  two  hundred  miles'  distance 
from  London,  a  somewhat  different  p_erson,  with  very  dif- 
ferent feelings,  and  in  very  different  circumstances.  It  was 
one  of  the  angels  of  the  earth — a  pure-hearted  and  very 
beautiful  girl ;  who,  after  a  day  of  peaceful,  innocent^  and 
charitable  employment,  and  having  just  quitted  the  piano, 
where  her  exquisite  strains  had  soothed  and  delighted  the 
feelings  of  her  brother,  harassed  with  political  anxieties,  hacl 


96  TEN  THOUSAND  A-YEAR. 

retired  to  her  chamber  for  the  night.  A  few  moments  before 
she  was  presented  to  the  reader,  she  had  extinguished  her 
taper,  and  dismissed  her  maid  without  her  having  discharg- 
ed more  than  half  her  accustomed  duties— telling  her 
that  she  should  finish  undressing  by  the  light  of  the  moon, 
which  then  poured  her  soft  radiance  into  every  corner  of  the 
spacious  but  old-fashioned  chamber  in  which  she  sat.  Then , 
she  drew  her  chair  to  the  window-recess,  and  pushing  open 
the  window,  sat  before  it,  half-undressed  as  she  was,  her 
hair  dishevelled,  her  head  leaning  on  her  hand,  gazing  on  the 
scenery  before  her  with  tranquil  admiration.  Silence  reign- 
ed absolutely.  Not  a  sound  issued  from  the  ancient  groves 
which  spread  far  and  wide  on  all  sides  of  the  fine  old  mansion 
in  which  she  dwelt— solemn  solitudes,  not  yet  less  soothing 
than  solemn  !  Was  not  the  solitude  enhanced  by  a  glimpse 
she  caught  of  a  restless  fawn,  glancing  in  the  distance  across 
the  avenue,  as  he  silently  changed  the  tree  under  which  he 
slept  ?  Then  the  gentle  breeze  would  enter  her  window, 
laden  with  sweet  scents  of  which  he  had  just  been  rifling  the 
coy  flowers  beneath,  in  their  dewy  repose,tended  and  petted 
during  the  day  by  her  own  delicate  hand ! — Beautiful  moon ! 
— cold  and  chaste  in  thy  skyey  palace,  studded  with  brilliant 
and  innumerable  gems,  and  sliedding  down  thy  rich  and 
tender  radiance  upon  this  lovely  seclusion — was  there  upon 
the  whole  earth  a  more  exquisite  countenance  then  turned  to- 
wards thee  than  hers  ? — V*  rap  thy  white  robe,  dearest  Kate, 
closer  round  thy  fair  bosom,  lest  the  amorous  night  breeze  do 
thee  hurt,  for  he  groweth  giddy  with  the  sight  of  thy 
charms !  Thy  rich  tresses,  half -uncurled,  are  growing  damp 
— so  it  is  time  that  thy  blue  eyes  should  seek  repose.  Hie 
theej  then,  my  love ! — to  yon  antique  couch,  with  its  quaint 
carvings  and  satin  draperies  dimly  visible  in  the  dusky  snade, 
inviting  thee  to  sleep  :  and  having  first  bent  in  cheerful 
reverence  before  thy  Maker— to  bed  ! — to  bed !— sweet  Kate, 
nothing  disturbing  thy  serene  thoughts,  or  agitating  that 
beautiful  bosom.  Hush!  hush! — Xow she  sleeps  !  It  is  well 
that  thine  eyes  are  closed  in  sleep  ;  for  BEHOLD— SEE  !  the 
brightness  without  is  disappearing ;  sadness  and  gloom  are 
settling  on  the  face  of  nature ;  the  tranquil  night  is  chang- 
ing her  aspect;  clouds  are  gathering,  winds  are  moaning; 
the  moon  is  gone:— but  sleep  on,  sweet  Kate — sleep  on, 
dreaming  not  of  dark  days  before  thee — Oh,  that  thou  couldst 

sleep  on  till  the  brightness  returned ! 

******** 

After  having  stood  thus  leaning  against  the  window  for 
nearly  half  an  nour,  Titmouse,  heavily  sighing,  returned  to 
bed — but  there  he  tossed  about  in  wretched  restlessness  till 
nearly  four  o'clock  in  the  morning.  If  he  now  and  then  sank 
into  forgetf  ulness  for  a  while,  it  was  only  to  be  harassed  by 
the  dreaful  image  of  Mrs.  Squallop,  shouting  at  him,  tearing 
his  hair,  cuffing  him,  flinging  a  pot  of  porter  in  his  face,  open- 


TEN  THOUSAND  A-YEAE.  97 

ing  his  boxes,tossing  his  clothes  about,  taking  out  his  inval- 
uable ornaments  ;  by  Tag-rag  kicking  him  out  of  the  shop ; 
and  Messrs.  Quirk,  'Gammon,  and  Snap  dashing  past  him 
in  a  line  carriage,  with  six  horses,  and  paying  no  attention 
to  him  as  he  ran  shouting  and  breathless  after  them  ;  Huck- 
aback following,  kicking  and  pinching  him  behind.  These 
were  the  few  little  bits  of  different  colored  glass  in  a  mental 
kaleidoscope,  which,  turned  capriciously  round,  produce 
those  innumerable  fantastic  combinations  out  of  the  simple 
and  ordinary  events  of  the  day,  which  we  call  dreams— tricks 
of  the  wild  sisters  Fancy,  when  sober  Reason  has  left  her 
seat  for  a  while.  But  this  is  fitter  for  the  Royal  Society  than 
the  bedroom  of  Tittlebat  Titmouse ;  and  I  beg  the  reader's 
pardon. 

About  six  o'clock,  Titmouse  rose  and  dressed  himself; 
and,  slipping  noiselessly  and  swiftly  down-stairs  and  out  of 
the  court,  in  order  to  avoid  all  possibility  of  encountering  his 
landlady  or  his  tailor,  soon  found  himself  in  Oxford  Street. 
Not  many  people  were  stirring  there.  One  or  two  men  who 
passed  him  were  smoking  their  morning's  pipe,  with  a  half 
awakened  air,  as  if  they  had  only  just  got  out  of  a  snug  bed, 
in  which  they  always  slept  every  moment  that  they  lay 
upon  it.  Titmouse  almost  envied  them !  What  a  squalid 
figure  he  looked  as  he  paced  up  and  down,  till  at  length  he 
saw  the  porter  of  Messrs.  Tag-rag  and  Co.  opening  the  shop- 
door.  He  soon  entered  it,  and  commenced  another  joyous 
day  in  that  delightful  establishment.  The  amiable  Mr.  Tag- 
rag  continued  unaltered. 

You're  at  liberty  to  take  yourself  off,  sir,  this  very  day — 
this  moment,  sir;  and  a  good  riddance,"  said  he  bitterly, 
during  the  course  of  the  day,  after  demanding  of  Titmouse 
how  he  dared  to  give  himself  such  sullen  airs ;  "  and  then 
we  shall  see  how  charming  easy  it  is  for  gents  like  you  to 
get  another  sitiwation,  sir !  Your  looks  and  manner  is  quite 
a  recommendation,  sir !  If  I  was  you,  sir,  I'd  raise  my  terms ! 
You're  worth  double  what  I  give,  sir !  "  Titmouse  made  no 
reply.  "  What  do  you  mean,  sir,  by  not  answering  me — eh, 
sir?"  suddenly  demanded  Tag-rag,  with  a  look  of  fury. 

"I  don't  know  what  you'd  have  me  say,  sir.  What  am  I 
to  say  sir  ?  "  inquired  Titmouse,  with  a  sigh. 

"•  What,  indeed !  1  should  like  to  catch  you !  Say,  indeed  ! 
Only  say  a  word— and  out  you  go,  neck  and  crop.  Attend  to 
that  old  lady  coming  in,  sir.  And  mind,  sir,  I've  got  my  eye 
on  you !  "  Titmouse  did  as  he  was  bid ;  and  Tag-rag,  a  bland 
smile  suddenly  beaming  in  his  attractive  features,  hurried 
down  towards  the  door,  to  receive  some  lady-customers, 
whom  he  observed  alighting  from  a  carriage :  and  at  that 
moment  you  would  have  sworn  that  he  was  one  of  the  kind- 
est-hearted, sweetest-tempered  men  in  the  world. 

When  at  length  this  day  had  come  to  a  close,  Titmouse, 
instead  of  repairing  to  his  lodgings,  set  off,  with  a  heavy 


98  TEN  THOUSAND  A-YEAE. 

heart,  to  pay  a  visit  to  his  excellent  friend  Huckaback,  whom 
he  knew  to  have  received  his  quarter's  salary  the  day  before, 
and  from  whom  he  faintly  hoped  to  succeed  in  extorting 
some  trifling  loan.  "  If  you  want  to  learn  the  value  of  money, 
try  to  borrow  some"  says  poor  Richard— and  Titmouse  was 
now  going  to  learn  that  useful  but  bitter  lesson.  Oh,  how 
disheartening  was  Mr.  Huckaback's  reception  of  him  !  That 
gentleman,  in  answering  the  modest  knock  of  Titmouse,  sus- 
pecting who  was  his  visitor,  opened  the  door  but  a  little  way, 
and  in  that  little  way?  with  his  hand  on  the  latch,  he  stood, 
with  a  plainly  repulsive  look. 

"Oh  f  it's  you,  Titmouse,  is  it?"  he  commenced,  coldly. 

"  Yes.  I— I  just  want  to  speak  a  word  to  you—  only  a  word 
or  two,  Hucky,  if  you  aren't  busy  ?  " 

"  Why,  I  was  just  going  to  go— but  what  d'ye  want,  Tit- 
mouse?" he  inquired,  in  a  freezing  manner  not  stirring 
from  where  he  stood. 

"  Let  me  come  inside  a  minute,"  implored  Titmouse,  feel- 
ing as  if  his  heart  were  really  dropping  out  of  him :  and,  in 
a  most  ungracious  manner,  Huckaback  motioned  him  in. 

"  Well,"  commenced  Huckaback,  with  a  chilling  distrust 
ful  look. 

"  Why,  Huck,  I  know  you're  a  good-natured  chap — you 
couldn't,  just  for  a  short  time,  lend  me  ten  shill  — 

"No,  curse  me  if  I  can  :  and  that's  flat!  "  briskly  inter- 
rupted Huckaback,  finding  his  worst  suspicions  confirmed. 

"Why,  Hucky,  wasn't  you  only  yesterday  paid  your 
salary?" 

"  Well ! —  suppose  I  was  ! — what  then  ?  You're  a  mon- 
strous cool  hand,  Titmouse!  I  never!  !  So  I'm  to  lend 
to  you,  when  I'm  starving  myself  ?  I've  received  such  a 
lot.  haven't  I  ?  " 

I  thought  we'd  always  been  friends,  Hucky,"  said  Tit- 
mouse faintly ;  "  and  so  we  shouldn't  mind  helping  one 
another  a  bit !  Don't  you  remember,  I  once  lent  you  half- 
a  crown  ?  " 

'  Half-a-crown !— and  that's  nine  months  ago  !  " 

"  Do,  Hucky,  do  !  '  Pon  my  soul,  I've  not  a  sixpence  in  the 
whole  world." 

"  Ha,  ha  !  A  pretty  chap  to  borrow  !  You  can  pay  so  well ! 
By  George,  Titmouse,  you're  a  cool  hand !  " 

"  If  you  won't  lend  me,  I  must  starve." 

"  Go  to  my  uncle's"  [Titmouse  groaned  aloud.]  "Well — 
and  why  not  ?  What  of  that  ?  "  continued  Huckaback,  sharp- 
ly and  bitterly.  "  I  dare  say  it  wouldn't  be  the  first  time 
you've  done  such  a  trick  no  more  than  me.  I'  ve  been  obligat- 
ed to  do  it.  Why  shouldn't  you  ?  A'n't  there  that  ring  ?  " 

"  Oh,  Lord  !  oh,  Lord  !  that's  just  what  Mrs.  Squallop  said 
last  night." 

"  Whew  !  She's  down  on  you,  is  she  !  And  you  have  the 
face  to  come  to  me  !  You— that's  a-going  to  be  sold  up,  come 


TEN  THOUSAND  A-YEAft.  99 

to  borrow  !  Lord,  that's  good,  anyhow  !    A  queer  use  that  to 
make  of  one's  friends  ;— it's  a  taking  them  in,  I  say  !  " 

"Oh,  Buck,  Huck,  if  you  only  knew  what  a  poor 
devil " 

"  Yes,  that's  what  I  was  a-saying  ;  but  it  a' n't '  poor  devils' 
one  lends  money  to,  so  easily,  I  warrant  me  ;  though  you 
a? n't  such  a  poor  devil— you're  only  shamming  !  Where's 
your  guard-chain,  your  studs,  your  breast-pin,  your  ring,  and 
all  that  ?  Sell  em  ?  if  not,  anyhow,  pawn  'em.  Can't  eat 
your  cake  and  have  it ;  fine  back  must  have  empty  belly  with 
us  sort  of  chaps." 

"  If  you'll  9nly  be  so  uncommon  kind  as  to  lend  me — this 
once— ten  shillings,"  continued  Titmouse  in  an  imploring 
tone,  "  I'll  bind  myself  by  a  solemn  oath,  to  pay  you  the  very 

first  moment  I  get  what's  due  to  me  from  Tag-rag  &  Co." 

Here  he  was  almost  choked  by  the  sudden  recollection  that 
he  had  almost  certainly  nothing  to  receive. 

"  You've  some  property  in  the  moon,  too,  that's  coming  to 
you,  you  know  !  "  said  Huckaback  with  an  insulting  sneer. 

"  I  know  what  you're  driving  at,"  said  poor  Titmouse  ;  and 
lie  continued  eagerly.  "  and  if  anything  should  ever  come  up 
from  Messrs.  Quirk,  Gam " 

"  Yough !  Faugh  !  Pish  !  Stuff  !  "  burst  out  Huckaback, 
in  a  tone  of  contempt  and  disgust ;  "  never  thought  there  was 
anything  in  it,  and  now  know  it !  It's  all  in  my  eye,  and  all 
that !  " 

"  Oh,  Hucky,  Hucky  !  You  don't  say  so  !  "  groaned  Tit- 
mouse, bursting  into  tears  \  "  you  did  not  always  say  so." 

"  It's  enough  that  I  say  it  now,  then  ;  will  that  do  ?  "  in- 
terrupted Huckaback,  impetuously. 

"•  On,  Lord,  Lord  !  what  is  to  become  of  me  ?  "  cried  Tit- 
mouse, \yith  a  face  full  of  anguish. 

[At  this  moment,  the  following  was  the  course  of  thought 
passing  through  the  mind  of  Mr.  Huckaback  ; — It  is  not 
certain  that  nothing  will  come  of  the  fellow's  affair  with 
Messrs.  Quirk,  Gammon,  and  Snap.  It  was  hardly  likely  that 
they  would  have  gone  as  far  as  Titmouse  represented  (law- 
yers as  they  were),  unless  they  had  seen  very  substantial 
grounds  for  doing  so.  Besides,  even  though  Titmouse  might 
not  get  ten  thousand  a  year,  he  mightyet  succeed  in  obtaining 
a  very  splendid  sum  of  money  ;  and  if  he  (Huckaback)  could 
but  get  a  little  slice  out  of  it,  Titmouse  was  now  nearly  despe- 
rate, and  would  promise  anything  ;  and  if  he  could  but  be 
wheedled  in  to  giving  anything  in  writing — Well,  thought 
Huckaback,  I'll  try  it,  however  !  ] 

"Ah,  Titmouse,  you' re- civil  enough  now.  and  would  promise 
anything,"  said  Huckaback,  appearing  to  hesitate  ;  but  when 
you  get  your  money  you'd  forget  everything  about  it — 

"  Forget  my  promise  !  Dear  Hucky  !  only  try  me — do  try 
me  but  once,  that's  all !  '  Pon  my  precious  life,  ten  shillings 


100  TEN  THOUSAND  A-YEAE. 

is  worth  more  to  me  now  than  a  hundred  pounds  may  be  by; 
and-by." 

"  Ay,  so  you  say  now  ;  but  d'ye  mean  to  tell  me  that,  if  I 
was  now  to  advance  you  ten  shillings  out  of  my  poor  little 
salary,"  continued  Huckaback  apparently  carelessly,  "-you'd 
for  instance,  pay  me  a  hundred  pounds  out  of  your  thou- 
sands ! " 

'•  Oh,  Lord  !  only  you  try  me — do  try  me !  "  said  Titmouse, 
eagerly. 

"  Oh,  I  dare  say,"  interrupted  Huckaback,  smiling  incred- 
ulously, and  chinking  some  money  in  his  trousers  pocket. 
Titmouse  heard  it,  and  (as  the  phrase  is)  his  teeth  watered  : 
and  he  immediately  swore  such  a  tremendous  oath  as  I  dare 
not  set  do\vn  in  writing  that  if  Huckaback  would  that  even- 
ing lend  him  ten  shillings.  Titmouse  would  give  him  one 
hundred  pounds  out  of  the  very  first  moneys  he  got  from  the 
estate. 

"  Ten  shillings  is  a  slapping  slice  out  of  my  little  salary — I 
shall  have,  by  George,  to  go  without  a  many  things  I'd  intend- 
ed getting  ;  it's  worth  ten  pounds  to  me,  just  now." 

"  Why,  dear  Hucky !  '  pon  my  soul, '  tis  worth  a  hundred 
to  me!  Mrs.  Squallop  will  sell  me  out,  bag  and  baggage,  if 
I  don't  give  her  something  to-morrow ! " — 

"  Well  if  I  really  thought— would  you  mind  giving  me,  now, 
a  bit  of  black  and  white  for  it  ?  " 

"  I'll  do  anything  you  like  ;  only  let  me  feel  the  ten  shil- 
lings in  my  fingers ! 

14  Well,  no  sooner  said  than  done,  if  you're  a  man  of  your 

and  a 

moonshine.  Ha,  ha !  I  sKalf  never  see  the  color  of  your 
money,  not,  I ;  so  I  may  as  well  say  two  hundred  when  I'm 
about  it,as  one  hundred " 

'*  Why,  hem !  Two  hundred,  Huck,  is  rather  a  large  figure  ; 
one  hundred's  odds  enough,  I'm  sure ! "  quoth  Titmouse 
meekly. 

,  "  P'r'aps,  Tit,  you  forget  the  licking  you  gave  me  the  other 
day,"  said  Huckaback  with  sudden  sternness.  "  Suppose  I 
was  to  go  to  an  attorney,  and  get  the  law  of  you,  what  a  sight 
of  damages  I  should  have— three  hundred  pounds  at  least ! " 

Titmouse  appeared  even  yet  hesitating. 

"  Well,  then !  "  said  Huckaback,  flinging  down  his  pen, 
"  suppose  I  have  them  yet— 

"  Come,  come,  Hucky,  'tis  all  past  and  gone,  all  that ', 

"  Is  it  ?  Well,  I  never  !  I  shall  never  be  again  the  same 
man  I  was  before  that  'ere  licking.  I've  a  sort  of  a— a — of  a — 
feeling  inside  as  if— my  breast  was— I  shall  carry  it  to  my 
grave— curse  me  if  I  sha'n't !  " 

[It  never  once  occurred  to  Titmouse,  not  having  his  friend 
Ur.  Gammon  at  his  elbow,  that  the  plaintiff  in  the  action  of 


TEN  THOUSAND  A-YEAE.  101 

Huckaback  v.  Titmouse  might  have  been  slightly  at  a  loss  for 
a  witness  of  the  assault ;  but  something  quite  as  good  in  its 
way — a  heaven-sent  suggestion — did  occur  to  him.] 

"  Ah,"  said  Titmouse  suddenly,  "  that's  true ;  and  un- 
common sorry  am  I ;  but  still,  a  hundred  pounds  is  a  hundred 
pounds  and  a  large  sum  for  the  use  of  vten  shillings,  and  a 
licking;  but  never  you  think  it's  all  moonshine  about  my 
business  with  Messrs.  Quirk,  Gammon,  and  Snap !  You  should 
only  have  heard  what  I've  heard  to-day  from  those  gents  ; 
hem !  but  I  won't  split  again  either." 

"  Eh  ?  What  ?  Heard  from  those  gents  at  Saffron  Hill  ?  " 
interrupted  Huckaback  briskly  ;  "  come,  Titty,  out  with  it — 
out  with  it ;  no  secrets  between  friends,  Titty ! " 

"  No,  I'll  be  hanged  if  I  do — I  won't  spoil  it  all  again  ;  and 
now  since  I've  let  out  as  much,  which  I  didn't  mean  to  do, 
I'll  tell  you  something  else — ten  shillings  is  no  use  to  me,  I 
must  have  a  pound." 

"  Titty,  Titty  ! "  exclaimed  Huckaback,  with  unaffected 
concern. 

"  And  won't  give  more  than  fifty  for  it  when  I  get  my  pro- 
perty either" Huckaback  whistled  aloud,  and  with  a  signif- 
icant air  buttoned  up  the  pocket  which  contained  the  money  ; 
intimating  that  now  the  negotiation  was  all  at  an  end,  for 
that  Titmouse's  new  terms  were  quite  out  of  the  question :] 
for  I  know  where  I  can  get  twenty  pounds  easily,  only  I  like 
to  come  to  a  friend  first. 

"  You  aren't  behaving  much  like  a  friend  to  one  as  has 
always  been  a  fast  friend  of  yours,  Titty!  A  pound! — I 
haven't  got  it  to  part  with,  that's  flat ;  so,  if  that's  your 
figure,  why,  you  must  even  go  to  your  other  friend,  and  leave 
poor  HuckV?  " 

"  Well,  I  don't  mind  saying  only  ten  shillings,"  quoth  Tit- 
mouse, fearing  that  he  had  been  going  on  rather  too  fast. 

"  Ah,  that's  something  reasonable-like,  Titty !  and  to  meet 
you  like  a  friend,  I'll  take  fifty  pounds  instead  of  a  hundred ; 
but  you  won't  object  now  to— you  know— a  deposit;  that 
ring  of  yours— well,  well !  it  don't  signify,  since  it  goes 
against  you ;  so  now,  here  goes,  a  bit  of  paper  for  ten  shil- 
lings, ha,  ha ! "  and  taking  a  pen,  after  a  pause,  in  which  he 
called  to  mind  as  much  of  the  phraseology  of  money  securi- 
ties as  he  could,  he  drew  up  the  following  stringent  docu- 
ment :— 

"  Know  all  Men  That  you  are  Bound  to  Mr.  It.  Huckaback 
Promising  The  Bearer  (on  Demand)  To  Pay  Fifty  Pounds  in 
cash  out  of  the  Estate,  if  you  Get  it.  (Value  received.) 

"  (Witness,)  22d  July,  18—. 
"  R.  HUCKABACK." 

V  There,  Titty— if  you're  an  honest  man,  and  would  do  as 
you  would  be  .done  by,"  said  Huckaback,  after  signing  his 


102  TEN  THOUSAND  A-YEAR. 

own  name  as  above,  handing  the  pen  19  Titmouse,  "sign 
that;  just  to  show  your  honor,  like— for,  in  course,  I  sha'n't 
ever  come  011  you  for  the  money— get  as  much  as  you  may." 

A  blessed  thought  occurred  to  poor  Titmouse  in  his  ex- 
tremity, viz.  that  there  was  no  stamp  on  the  above  instru- 
ment, (and  he  had  never  seen  a- promissory-note  or  bill  of 
exchange  without  one;)  and  he  signed  it  instantly,  with 
many  fervent  expressions  of  gratitude.  Huckaback  received 
the  valuable  security  with  apparently  a  careless  air ;  and 
after  cramming  it  into  his  pocket,  as  if  it  had  been  in  reality 
only  a  bit  of  waste  paper,  counted  put  ten  shillings  into  the 
eager  hand  of  Titmouse ;  who,  having  thus  most  unexpect- 
edly succeeded  in  his  mission,  soon  afterwards  departed- 
each  of  this  pair  of  worthies  fancying  that  he  had  succeeded 
in  cheating  the  other.  Huckaback,  having  very  cordially 
shaken  Titmouse  by  the  hand,  heartily  damned  him  upon  shut- 
ting the  door  on  him ;  and  then  anxiously  perused  and  re-per- 
used his  "  security,"  wondering  whether  it  was  possible  for 
Titmouse  at  any  time  thereafter  to  evade  it,  and  considering 
by  what  means  he  could  acquaint  himself  with  the  progress  of 
Titmouse's  affairs.  The  latter  gentleman,  as  he  hurried  home- 
ward, dwelt  for  a  long  while  upon  only  one  thought — how 
fortunate  was  the  omission  of  his  friend  to  have  a  stamp 
upon  his  security!  When  and  where,  thought  he,  was  it 
that  he  had  heard  that  nothing  would  do  without  a  stamp  ? 
However,  he  had  got  the  ten  shillings  safe  ;  and  Huckaback 
might  wait  for  his  fifty  pounds  till — but  in  the  meanwhile  he, 
Titmouse,  seemed  to  stand  a  fair  chance  of  going  to  the  dogs  ; 
the  ten  shillings,  which  he  had  just  obtained  with  so  much 
difficulty,  were  to  find  their  way  immediately  into  the  pock- 
ets of  his  landlady,  whom  it  might  pacify  for  a  day  or  two, 
and  what  quarter  was  he  now  to  look  to  for  the  smallest 
assistance  ?  What  was  to  become  of  him  ?  Titmouse  was  a 
miserable  fool ;  but  thoughts  such  as  these,  in  such  circum- 
stances as  his,  would  force  themselves  into  the  mind  of  even 
a  fool!  How  could  he  avoid— oh,  horrid  thought !— soon 
parting  with,  or  at  least  pawning,  his  ring  and  his  other  pre- 
cious trinkets?  He  burst  into  a  perspiration  at  the  mere 
thought  of  seeing  them  hanging  ticketed  for  sale  in  the  win- 
dow of  old  Balls !  As  he  slowly  ascended  the  stairs  which 
led  to  his  apartment,  he  felt  as  if  he  were  following  some  un- 
seen conductor  to  a  dungeon. 

He  was  not  aware  that  all  this  while,  although  he  heard 
nothing  from  them,  he  occupied  almost  exclusively  the 
thoughts  of  those  distinguished  practitioners  in  the*  law, 
Messrs.  Quirk,  Gammon,  and  Snap.  They,  in  common  with 
Huckaback,  had  an  intense  desire  to  share  in  his  anticipated 
good  fortune,  and  determined  to  do  so  according  to  their  op- 
portunities. The  excellent  Huckaback  (a  model  of  a  usurer 
on  a  small  scale)  had  promptly  and  adroitly  seized  hold  of 
the  very  first  opportunity  that  presented  itself,  for  securing 


TEN  THOUSAND  A-TEAE.  103 

a  little  return  hereafter  for  the  ten  shillings,  with  which  he 
had  so  generously  parted  when  he  could  so  ill  afford  it; 
while  Messrs.  Quirk,  Gammon,  and  Snap  were  racking  their 
brains,  and,  from  time  to  time,  those  of  Messrs.  Mortmain 
and  Frankpledge,  to  discover  some  instrument  strong  and 
large  enough  to  cut  a  fat  slice  for  themselves  out  of  the  fort- 
une they  were  endeavoring,  for  that  purpose,  to  put  within 
the  reach  of  Mr.  Titmouse.  A  rule  of  three  mode  of  stating 
the  matter  would  be  thus :  as  the  inconvenience  of  Huck- 
aback's parting  with  his  ten  shillings  and  his  waiver  of 
damages  for  a  very  cruel  assault,  were  to  his  contingent 
gain,  hereafter,  of  £50 ;  so  were  Messrs.  Quirk,  Gammon,  and 
Snap's  risk,  exertions,  oulay  and  benefit  conferred  on  Tit- 
mouse, to  their  contingent,  gain  often  thousand  pounds.  The 
principal  point  of  difference  between  them  was— as  to  the 
mode  of  securing  tbeir  future  recompense :  in  which  it  may 
have  been  observed  by  the  attentive  reader,  with  respect  to  the 
precipitancy  of  Huckaback  and  hesitating  caution  of  Messrs. 
Quirk,  Gammon,  and  Snap,  that — "  thus  fools  "  (e.  g.  Huck- 
aback) "  rushed  in  where  angels  "( i.  e.  Messrs,  Quirk,  Gammon, 
and  Snap)  '"''feared  to  tread."  Let  me  not,  however,  for  a  mo- 
ment, insinuate  that  both  these  parties  were  actuated  by 
only  one  motive,  i.  e.  to  make  a  prey  of  this  little  monkey 
millionnaire  that  was  to  be.  'Tis  true  that  Huckaback  ap- 
pears to  have  driven  rather  a  hard  bargain  with  his  dis- 
tressed friend,  (and  almost  every  one  that,  being  similarly 
situated,  has  occasion  for  such  services  as  Titmouse  sought 
from  Huckaback,  will  find  himself  called  upon  to  pay  pretty 
nearly  the  same  price  for  them ;)  but  it  was  attended  with 
one  good  effect ;  for  the  specific  interest  in  Titmouse's  future 
prosperity,  acquired  by  Huckaback,  quickened  his  energies 
and  sharpened  his  wits  in  the  service  of  his  friend.  But  for 
this,  indeed,  it  is  probable  that  Mr.  Huckaback  s  door  would 
have  become  as  hopelessly  closed  against  Titmouse  as  was 
that  of  Messrs.  Quirk,  Gammon,  and  Snap.  Some  two  or 
three  nights  after  the  little  transaction  between  the  two 
friends  which  I  have  been  describing,  Huckaback  called  upon 
Titmouse,  and  after  greeting  him  rather  cordially,  told  him 
that  he  had  come  to  put  him  up  to  a  trick  upon  the  Saffron 
Hill  people,  that  would  tickle  them  into  a  little  activity  in 
his  affairs.  The  trick  was— the  sending  a  letter  to  those 
gentlemen  calculated  to — but  why  attempt  to  characterize 
it?  I  have  the  original  document  lying  before  me,  which 
was  sent  by  Titmouse  the  very  next  morning  to  Messrs. 
Quirk,  Gammon,  and  Snap ;  and  fiere  follows  a  verbatim  copy 
of  it:— 

"JVo.  9  Closet  Court, 

Oxford  Street. 
"  To  Messrs.  QUIRK  &  Co. 

"Gents, — Am  Sorry  to  Trouble  You,  But  Being  Drove 
quite  desperate  at  my  Troubles  (which  have  brot  me  to  my 


104  TEN  THOUSAND  A-YEAB. 

Last  Penny  a  Week  ago)  and  Mrs.  Squallop  my  Landlady  wd 
distrain  on  Me  only  that  There  Is  nothing  to  distrain  on,  Am 
Determined  to  Go  Abroad  in  a  Week's  Time,  and  shall  Never 
come  Any  More  back  again  with  Great  Grief  wii  Is  What  I 
now  Write  To  tell  You  Of  (Hoping  you  will  please  Take  No 
notice  of  it)  So  Need  give  Yourselves  No  Further  Concern 
with  my  Concerns  Seeing  The  Estate  is  Not  To  Be  Had  and 
Am  Sorry  you  Shd  Have  Had  so  Much  trouble  with  My  Af- 
fairs wh  cd  not  Help.  Shd  have  Much  liked  The  Thing,  only 
it  Was  Not  worth  Stopping  For,  or  Would,  but  Since  It  Was 
not  God's  Will  be  Done  which  it  will.  Have  raised  a  Trifle 
On  my  Future  Prospects  (wh  am  Certain  There  is  Nothing 
In)  from  a  True  Friend'''  [need  it  be  guessed  at  whose  in- 
stance these  words  found  their  way  into  the  letter  ? "]  "  w11 
was  certainly  uncommon  inconvenient  to  That  Person  But 
Ha  do  Anything  to  Do  me  good  As  he  says  Am  going  to 
raise  A  Little  More  from  a  Gent  That  does  Things  of  That 
Nature  wh  will  help  me  with  Expense  in  Going  Abroad 
(which  place  I  Never  mean  to  Return  from).  Have  fixed 
for  the  10th  To  Go  on  w&  Day  Shall  Take  leave  Of  Mr. 
Tag-rag  (who  on  my  Return  Shall  be  glad  to  See  Buried  or  in 
the  Workhouse).  Have  wrote  This  letter  Only  to  Save  Yr 
Respectable  Selves  trouble  wh  Trust  You  wd  not  have  Taken. 
"And  Remain, 

"Gents, 
"  Yr  humble  Unworthy  servant, 

"T.  TITMOUSE. 

"  P.  S—  Hope  you  will  Particularly  Remember  me  to 
Mr.  Gammon.  What  is  to  become  of  me,  know  nothing, 
being  so  troubled.  Am  Humbly  Determined  not  to  employ 
any  Gents  in  This  matter  except  yr  most  Respectable  House, 
and  shd  be  most  Truly  Sorry  to  Go  Abroad  whh  am  really 
Often  thinking  of  in  Earnest.  (Unless  something  Speedily 
Turns  Up,  favourable),  T.  T—  Sh<*  like  (by  the  way)  to  know 
if  you  shd  be  so  Disposed  what  yr  respe  house  w^  take  for 
my  Chances  Down  (Out  and  out)  In  a  Round  Sum  (Ready 
Money)  And  hope  if  they  Write  It  will  be  by  next  Post  or 
Shall  be  Gone  Abroad." 

Old  Mr.  Quirk,  as  soon  as  he  had  finished  the  perusal  of 
this  skilful  document,  started,  a  little  disturbed,  from  his 
seat  and  bustled  into  Mr.  Gammon's  room  with  Mr.  Tit- 
mouse s  open  letter  in  his  hand.—"  Gammon,"  said  he,  "  just 
cast  your  eye  over  this,  will  you  ?  Really,  we  must  look  after 
Titmouse,  or  he'll  be  gone  !  *  Mr.  Gammon  took  the  letter 
rather  eagerly,  read  deliberately  through  it,  and  then  looked 
up  at  his  fidgety  partner,  who  stood  anxiously  eying  him, 
and  smiled. 

"  Well,  Gammon,  I  really  think— eh  ?    Don't  you " 

Upon  my  word,  Mr.  Quirk,  this  nearly  equals  his  former 


TEN  THOUSAND  A-YEAK.  105 

letter;  and  it  also  seems  to  have  produced  on  you  tne  desir- 
ed effect." 

"  Well,  Gammon,  and  what  of  that?  Because  my  heart 
don't  happen  to  be  quite  a  piece  of  flint,  you're  always — " 

"  You  might  have  been  a  far  wealthier  man  than  you  are 
but  for  that  soft  heart  of  yours,  Mr.  Quirk," — said  Gammon 
with  a  bland  smile.  (!) 

"  I  know  I  might,  Gammon— I  know  it.  I  thank  my  God 
I'm  not  so  keen  after  business  that  I  can't  feel  for  this  poor 
soul — really,  his  state's  quite  deplorable !  " 

"  Then  my  dear  sir,  put  your  hand  into  your  pocket  at 
once,  as  I  was  suggesting  last  night,  and  allow  him  a  week- 
ly sum." 

'  A — hem  !  hem !  Gammon  " — said  Quirk,  sitting  down, 
thrusting  his  hands  into  his  waistcoat  pockets,  and  looking 
very  earnestly  at  Gammon. 

"Well,  then,"  replied  that  gentleman,  shrugging  his  shoul- 
ders, in  answer  to  the  mute  appeal—"  write  and  say  you 
won't — 'tis  soon  done,  and  so  the  matter  ends-" 

"  Why,  Gammon,  you  see,  if  he  goes  abroad,"  said  Quirk, 
after  a  long  pause—"  we  lose  him  forever. 

"  Pho !— go  abroad !  He's  too  much  for  you,  Mr.  Quirk- 
he  is  indeed,  ha,  ha !  " 

"  You're  fond  of  a  laugh  at  my  expense,  Gammon ;  it's 
quite  pleasant— you  can't  think  how  I  like  that  same  laugh 
of  yours !  " 

"  I  beg  your  pardon,  Mr.  Quirk— but  you  really  misunder- 
stand me ;  I  was  laughing  only  at  the  absurd  inconsistency 
of  the  fellow :  he's  a  most  transparent  little  fool,  and  takes 
us  for  such.  Go  abroad !  Ridiculous  pretence !— In  his  pre- 
cious postscript  he  undoes  all— he  says  he  is  only  of  ten  think- 
ing of  going— pshaw !— That  the  wretch  is  in  great  distress 
is  very  probable  ;  but  it  must  go  hard  with  him  before  he 
either  commits  suicide  or  goes  abroad,  I  warrant  him :  I've 
no  fears  on  that  score— but  there  is  a  point  in  the  letter  that 
may  be  worth  considering— I  mean  the  fellow's  hint  about 
borrowing  money  on  his  prospects." 

"  Yes,  to  be  sure— the  very  thing  that  struck  me."  [Gam- 
mon faintly  smiled.]  "  I  never  thought  much  about  the  other 
part  of  the  letter— all  stuff  about  going  abroad — pho !— But 
to  be  sure,  if  he's  trying  to  raise  money,  he  may  get  into  keen 
hands.— Do  you  really  think  he  has  ? 

"Oh  no— of  course  it's  only  a  little  lie  of  his— or  he  must 
have  found  out  some  greater  fool  than  himself,  which  I  had 
not  supposed  possible.  But  however  that  may  be,  I  really 
think,  Mr.  Quirk,  it's  high  time  that  we  should  take  some  de- 
cided step." 

"Well,—  yes,  it  may  be,"  said  Quirk,  slowly—"  and  I  must 
say  that  Mortmain  encouraged  me  a  good  deal  the  day  before 
yesterday." 

"  Well,  and  you  know  what  Mr.  Frankpledge " 


106  TEN  THOUSAND  A-YEAE. 

"  Oh,  as  to  Frankpledge— hem  !  " 

"What  of  Mr.  Frankpledge,  Mr.  Quirk?"  inquired  Gam. 
mon,  rather  tartly. 

"  There !  There  !— Always  the  way— But  what  does  it  sig- 
nify ?  Come,  come,  Gammon,  we  know  each  other  too  well 
to  quarrel!— I  don't  mean  anything  disrespectful  to  Mr. 
Frankpledge,  but  when  Mortmain  has  been  one's  convey- 
ancer these  twenty  years,  and  never  once— hem !— but,  how- 
ever, he  tells  me  that  we  are  now  standing  on  sure  ground, 
91-  that  he  don't  know  what  sure  ground  is,  and  sees  no  ob- 
jection to  our  even  taking  preliminary  steps  in  the  matter, 
which  indeed  I  begin  to  think  it  high  time  to  do !— And  as 
for  securing  ourselves  in  respect  of  any  advances  to  Tit- 
mouse—he suggests  our  taking  a  bond,  conditioned— say, 
for  the  payment  of  .£500  or  .£1000  on  demand,  under  cover 
of  which  one  might  advance  him,  you  know,  just  such  sums 
as,  and  when  we  pleased ;  one  could  stop  when  one  thought 
fit :  one  could  begin  with  three  or  four  pounds  a-week,  and 
increase  as  his  prospects  improved— eh  ? 

"  You  know  Pve  no  objection  to  such  an  arrangement ;  but 
consider  Mr.  Quirk,  we  must  have  patience ;  it  will  take  a 
long  while  to  get  our  verdict,  you  know,  and  perhaps  as  long 
to  secure  it  afterwards  ;  and  this  horrid  little  wretch  all  the 
while  on  our  hands  ;  what  the  deuce  to  do  with  him,  I  really 
don't  know ! " 

"Humph,  humph!"  grunted  Quirk,  looking  very  earnest- 
ly and  uneasily  at  Gammon. 

"  And  what  I  chiefly  fear  is  this,— suppose  he  should  get 
dissatisfied  with  the  amount  of  our  advances,  and,  knowing 
the  state  and  prospects  of  the  cause,  should  then  turn  res- 
tive?" 

"  Ay,  confound  it,  Gammon,  all  that  should  be  looked  to, 
shouldn't  it  ?  "  interrupted  Quirk,  with  an  exceedingly  cha- 
grined air. 

"To  be  sure  continued  Gammon  thoughtfully:  "  By  that 
time  he  may  have  got  substantial  friends  about  him,  whom 
he  could  persuade  to  become  security  to  us  for  further  and 
past  advances." 

"  Nay,  now  that  you  name  the  thing,  Gammon ;  it  was 
what  I  was  thinking  of  only  the  other  day  : "  he  dropped  his 
voice—"  Isn't  there  one  or  two  of  our  own  clients,  hem  ! " 

"  Why,  certainly,  there's  old  Fang;  I  don't  think  it  impos- 
sible he  might  be  induced  to  do  a  little  usury — it's  all  he 
lives  for,  Mr.  Quirk ;  and  the  security  is  good  in  reality, 
tnough  perhaps  not  exactly  marketable." 

"  Nay ;  but,on  second  thoughts,  why  not  do  it  myself,  if 
anything  can  be  made  of  it? 

'  That,  however,  will  be  for  future  consideration.  In  the 
mean  time,  we'd  better  send  for  Titmouse,  and  manage  him 
a  little  more— discreetly,  eh  ?  We  did  not  exactly  hit  it  off 
last  time,  did  we,  Mr.  Quirk  ?  "  said  Gammon,  smiling  rather 


TEN  THOUSAND  A-YEAEi  107 

sarcastically.    "We  must  keep  him  at  Tag-rag's  if  the  thing 
can  be  done  for  the  present,  at  all  events. 

"  To  be  sure  ;  he  couldn't  then  come  buzzing  about  us, 
like  a  gad-fly ;  he'd  drive  us  mad  in  a  week,  I'm  sure." 

"Oh,  I'd  rather  give  up  everything  than  submit  to  it.  It 
can't  be  difficult  for  us,  I  should  think,  to  bind  him  to  our 
own  terms— to  put  a  bridle  in  the  ass's  mouth  ?  Let  us  say 
that  we  insist  on  his  signing  an  undertaking  to  act  implicit- 
ly according  to  our  directions  in  everything." 

"  Ay,  to  be  sure  ;  on  pain  of  our  instantly  turning  him  to 
the  right  about.  I  fancy  it  will  do  now  ! " 

"  And  now,  Mr.  Quirk,"  said  Gammon,  with  as  much  of 
peremptoriness  in  his  tone  as  he  could  venture  upon  to  Mr. 
Quirk,  "  you  really  must  do  me  the  favor  to  leave  the  man- 
agement of  this  little  wretch  to  me.  You  see,  he  seems  to 
have  taken — Heaven  save  the  mark ! — a  fancy  to  me,  poor 
fellow  '—and— and— it  must  be  owned,  we  miscarried  sadly 
the  other  night,  on  a  certain  grand  occasion—eh?'' 

Quirk  shook  his  head  dissentingly. 

''  Well,  then,"  continued  Gammon,  "  one  thing  I  am  deter- 
mined on :  one  or  the  other  of  us  shall  undertake  Titmouse, 
solely  and  singly.  Pray,  for  Heaven's  sake,  tackle  him  your- 
self— a  disagreeable  duty !  You  know,  my  dear  sir,  how  in- 
variably I  leave  everything  of  real  importance  and  difficulty 
to  your  very  superior  tact  and  experience." 

Come,  come,  Gammon,  that's  a  drop  of  sweet  oil — 

Quirk  might  well  say  so,  for  he  felt  its  softening,  smooth- 
ing effects  already. 

"Upon  my  word  and  honor  Mr.  Quirk,  I'm  in  earnest. 
Pshaw !— and  you  must  know  it.  I  know  you  too  well,  my 
dear  sir,  to  attempt  to " 

"  Certainly,  I  must  say,  those  must  get  up  very  early  that 
can  find  Caleb  Quirk  napping," — Gammon  felt  at  that  moment 
that  for  several  years  he  must  have  been  a  very  early  riser. 
And  so  the  matter  was  arranged  in  the  manner  which  Gam- 
mon had  wished  and  determined  upon, -L  e.  that  Mr.  Titmouse 
should  be  left  entirely  to  his  management ;  and,  after  some 
little  discussion  as  to  the  time  and  manner  of  the  meditated 
advances,  the  partners  parted.  On  entering  his  own  room, 
Quirk,  closing  his  door,  stood  leaning  against  the  side  of  the 
window,  with  his  hands  in  his  pockets,  arid  his  eyes  instinct- 
ively resting  on  his  banker's  book,  which  lay  on  the  table. 
He  was  in  a  very  brown  study :  the  subject  on  which  his 
thoughts  were  busied  being  the  prudence  or  imprudence  of 
leaving  Titmouse  thus  in  the  hands  of  Gammon.  It  might 
be  all  very  well  for  Quirk  to  assert  his  self-confidence  when 
in  Gammon's  presence,  but  he  did  not  really  feel  it.  He 
never  left  Gammon  after  any  little  difference  of  opinion,  how- 
ever friendly,  without  a  secret  suspicion  that  somehow  or 
another  Gammon  had  been  too  much  for  him,  and  always 
gained  his  purposes,  without  giving  Quirk  any  handle  of  dis« 


108  TEN  THOUSAND  A-YEAE. 

satisfaction.  In  fact,  Quirk  was  thoroughly  afraid  of  Gam 
mon,  and  Gammon  knew  it.  In  the  present  instance,  an  m> 
definable  but  increasing  suspicion  and  dissatisfaction  forced 
him  presently  back  again  into  Gammon's  room. 

"I  say,  Gammon,  you  understand,  eh?— Fair  y>lay,  you 
know,"  he  commenced,  with  a  shy  embarrassed  air,  ill  con- 
cealed  under  a  forced  smile. 

"  Pray,  Mr.  Quirk,  what  may  be  your  meaning  ?  "  inquired 
Gammon  \yith  unusual  tartness,  with  an  astonished  air,  and 
blushing  violently,  which  was  not  surprising ;  for  ever  since 
Quirk  had  quitted  him,  Gammon's  thoughts  had  been  occu- 
pied with  only  one  question,  viz.  how  he  should  go  to  work 
with  Titmouse  to  satisfy  him  that  he  (Gammon)  was  the  only 
member  of  the  firm  that  had  a  real  disinterested  regard  for 
him,  and  so  acquire  a  valuable  control  over  him.  Thus  oc- 
cupied, the  observation  of  Quirk  had  completely  taken  Gam- 
mon aback ;  and  he  lost  his  presence  of  mind,  of  course  his 
.  temper  quickly  following.  Will  you  favor  me,  Mr.  Quirk, 
with  an  explanation  of  your  extraordinarily  absurd  and  offen- 
sive observation  ?  "  said  he  reddening  more  and  more  as  he 
looked  at  Mr.  Quirk. 

"  You're  a  queer  hand,  Gammon,"  replied  Quirk,  with  al- 
most an  equally  surprised  and  embarrassed  air,  for  he  could 
not  resist  a  sort  of  conviction  that  Gammon  had  fathomed 
what  had  been  passing  in  his  mind. 

"What  did  you  mean,  Mr.  Quirk,  by  your  singular  obser- 
vation just  now  ?"  said  Gammon  calmly,  having  recovered 
his  presence  of  mind. 

"Mean?  Why,  that— we're  both  queer  hands,  Gammon, 
ha,  ha,  ha !"  answered  Quirk,  with  an  anxious  laugh. 

"  I  shall  leave  Titmouse  entirely — entirely,  Mr.  Quirk,  in 
your  hands;  I  will  have  nothing  whatever  to  do  with  him. 
I  am  quite  sick  of  him  and  his  affairs  already;  I  cannot 
bring  myself  to  undertake  such  an  affair,  and  that  was  what 
I  was  thinking  of,— when " 

"Eh?  indeed!  Well,  to  be  sure!  Only  think!"  said 
Quirk,  dropping  his  voice,  looking  to  see  that  the  two  doors 
were  shut,  and  resuming  the  chair  which  he  had  lately  quit- 
ted. "What  do  you  think  has  been  occurring  to  me  in  my 
own  room,  just  now  ?  Whether  it  would  suit  us  better  to 
throw  this  monkey  overboard,  put  ourselves  confidentially  in 
communication  with  the  party  in  possession,  and  tell  him 
that— hem !— for  a— eh?  You  understand ?— a  con-si-de-ra- 
tion— a  suitable  con-si-de-ra-tion." 

^  Mr.  Quirk !    Heavens !"    Gammon  was  really  amazed. 

"  Well  ?  You  needn't  open  your  eyes  so  very  wide,  Mr. 
Gammon— why  shouldn't  it  be  done  ?  You  know  we  shouldn't 
be  satisfied  with  a  trifle,  of  course.  But  suppose  he'd  agree 
to  buy  our  silence  with  four  or  five  thousand  pounds,  really, 
its  well  worth  considering !  Upon  my  soul,  Gammon,  it  is 
a  hard  thing  on  him ;  no  fault  of  his,  and  it  is  very  hard  for 


TEN  THOUSAND  A-YEAlt.  109 

him  to  turn  out,  and  for  such  a — eugh ! — such  a  wretch  as 
Titmouse  ;  you'd  feel  it  yourself,  Gammon,  if  you  were  in  his 
place,  and  I'm  sure  you'd  think  that  four  or  five  thous 

"  But  is  not  Titmouse  our  POOR  NEIGHBOR  ?  said  Gammon, 
with  a  sly  smile. 

"  Why,  that's  only  one  way  of  looking  at  it,  Gammon ! 
Perhaps  the  man  we  are  going  to  eject  does  a  vast  deal  of 
good  with  the  property ;  certainly  he  bears  a  very  high  name 
in  the  county — and  fancy  Titmouse  with  ten  thousand  a- 
year ! ' 

"  Mr.  Quirk,  Mr.  Quirk,  it's  not  to  be  thought  of  for  a  mo- 
ment— not  for  a  moment,"  interrupted  Gammon  seriously, 
and  even  somewhat  peremptorily — "nothing  should  per- 
suade me  to  be  any  party  to  such " 

At  this  moment  Snap  burst  into  the  room  with  a  heated 
appearance,  and  a  chagrined  air 

*  Pitch  v.  Grub— 

[This  was  a  little  pet  action  of  poor  Snap's :  it  was  for 
slander  uttered  by  the  defendant  (an  ostler)  against  the 
plaintiff,  (a  waterman  on  a  coach-stand,)  charging  the  plain- 
tiff with  having  the  mange,  on  account  of  which  a  woman  re- 
fused to  marry  him.] 

" Pitch  v.  Grub  just  been  tried  at  Guildhall.  Witness 
bang  up  to  the  mark — words  and  special  damage  proved; 
slapping  speech  from  Sergeant  Shout.  Verdict  for  plaintiff 
• — but  only  one  farthing ;  and  Lord  Widdrington  said,  as  the 
jury  had  given  one  farthing  tor  damages,  he  would  give  him 
another  for  costs,  *  and  that  would  make  a  halfpenny ;  on 
which  the  defendant  s  attorney  tendered  me  a  halfpenny 
on  the  spot.  Laughter  in  court— move  for  new  trial  first  day 
of  next  term,  and  tip  his  lordship  a  rattler  in  the  next  Sun- 
day's Flash !" 

"  Mr.  Quirk,  once  for  all,  if  these  kind  of  actions  are  to  go 
on  1 11  leave  the  firm,  come  what  will.  [It  flickered  across 
his  mind  that  Titmouse  would  be  a  capital  client  to  start 
with  on  his  own  account.]  "  I  ^protest  our  names  will  quite 
stink  in  the  profession." 

"Good,  Mr.  Gammon,  good!"  interposed  Snap,  warmly; 
"  your  little  action  for  the  usury  penalties  the  other  day  came 
off  so  uncommon  well !" 

"Let  me  tell  you,  Mr.  Snap,"  interrupted  Gammon,  redden- 
ing  

*  I  suppose  myself  to  be  alluding  here  to  a  very  oppressive  statute, 
passed  to  clip  the  wings  of  such  gentlemen  as  Mr.  Snap,  by  which  it  is 
enacted,  that,  in  actions  for  slander,if  the  jury  find  a  verdict  under  forty 
shillings,  e.  g.  as  in  the   case  in  the   text,  for  one  farthing,  the  plaintiff 
shall  be  entitled  to  recover  from  the  defendant  only  as  much  costs  as  dam- 
ages L  e.  another  farthing  ;  a  provision  which  has  made  many  a  poor  petti- 
fogger sneak  out  of  court  with  a  flea  in  his  ear.     Since  this  was  written,  a 
still  more  stringent  statute  hath  been  made,  which,  'tis  to  be  hoced,  will 
put  down  the  uuisance. 


HO  TEN  THOUSAND  A-YEAB. 

"  Pho !  Come !  Can't  be  helped— fortune  of  the  war,"— 
interrupted  the  head  of  the  firm,— "Is  fitch  solvent/— of 
course  we've  security  for  costs  out  of  pocket." 

Now,  the  fact  was,  that  poor  Snap  had  picked  up  Pitch 
at  one  of  the  police  offices,  and,  in  his  zeal  for  business,  had 
undertaken  his  case  on  pure  speculation,  relying  on  the  ap- 
parent strength  of  the  plaintiff's  case— Pitch  being  only  a 
waterman  attached  to  a  coach-stand.  When,  therefore,  the 
very  ominous  question  of  Mr.  Quirk  met  Snap's  ear,  he  sud- 
denly happened  (at  least,  he  thought  so)  to  hear  himself 
called  for'trom  the  clerk's  room,  and  bolted  out  of  Mr.  Gam- 
mon's room  rather  unceremoniously. 


mon, 
with 
Titmouse  to-morrow ! 

The  brief  he  was  drawing  up  was  for  a  defendant  who  was 
going  to  nonsuit  the  plaintiff,  (a  man  with  a  large  family,  who 
had  kindly  lent  the  defendant  a  considerable  sum  of  money.) 
solely  because  of  the  want  of  a  stamp. 

Quirk  differed  in  opinion  with  Gammon,  and,  as  he  resum- 
ed his  seat  at  his  desk,  he  could  not  help  writing  the  words, 
"  Quirk  and  Snap,"  and  thinking  how  well  such  a  firm  would 
sound  and  work— for  Snap  was  verily  a  chip  of  the  old  block ! 

There  will  probably  never  be  wanting  tnose  who  will  join 
in  abusing  and  ridiculing  attorneys  and  solicitors.  Wny  ? 
In  almost  every  action  at  law,  or  suit  in  equity,  or  proceeding 
which  may,  or  may  not,  lead  to  one,  each  client  conceives  a 
natural  dislike  for  his  opponent's  attorney  or  solicitor.  If 
the  plaintiff  succeeds,  he  hates  the  defendant's  attorney  for 
putting  him  (the  said  plaintiff)  to  so  much  expense,  and  caus- 
ing him  so  much  vexation  and  danger ;  and,  when  he  comes 
to  settle  with  his  own  attorney,  there  is  not  a  little  heart- 
burning in  looking  at  his  bill  of  cost,  however  reasonable.  If 
the  plaintiff  fails,  of  course  it  is  through  the  ignorance  and 
unskilfulness  of  his  attorney  or  solicitor ;  and  he  hates  almost 
equally  his  own  and  his  opponent's  attorney.  Precisely  so  is 
it  with  a  successful  or  unsuccessful  defendant.  In  fact,  an  at- 
torney or  solicitor  is  almost  always  obliged  to  be  acting 
adversely  to  some  one  of  whom  he  at  once  makes  an  enemy ; 
for  an  attorney's  weapons  must  necessarily  be  pointed  almost 
invariably  at  our  pockets !  He  is  necessarily,  also  called  into 
action  in  cases  when  all  the  worst  passions  of  our  nature — 
our  hatred  and  revenge,  and  our  self-interest—are  set  in 
motion.  Consider  the  mischief  that  might  be  constantly 
done  on  a  grand  scale  in  society,  if  the  vast  majority  of  attor- 
neys and  solicitors  were  not  honorable  and  able  men !  Con- 
ceive, them,  for  a  moment,  disposed  everywhere  to  stir  up 
litigation,  by  availing  themselves  of  their  perfect  acquaint- 
ance with  almost  all  men's  circumstance— artfully  inflaming 
irritable  and  vindictive  clients,  kindling,  instead  of  stifling, 
family  dissensions,  and  fomenting  public  strife— why,  were 


TEN  THOUSAND  A-TEAR.  Ill 

they  to  do  only  a  hundredth  part  of  what  it  is  thus  in  theii 
power  to  do,  our  courts  of  justice  would  soon  be  doubled,  to- 
gether  with  the  number  of  our  judges,  counsel,  and  attor- 
neys ;  new  jails  must  be  built  to  hold  the  ruined  litigants— 
and  the  insolvent  court  enlarged  and  in  constant  session 
throughout  the  year. 

But  not  all  of  this  body  of  honorable  and  valuable  men  are 
entitled  to  this  tribute  of  praise.  There  are  a  few  QUIRKS, 
several  GAMMONS,  and  many  SNAPS,  in  the  profession  of  the 
law — men  whose  characters  and  doings  often  make  fools  visit 
the  sins  of  individuals  upon  the  whole  species ;  nay,  there 
are  far  worse,  as  I  have  heard — but  I  must  return  to  my 
narrative. 

On  Friday  night,  the  28th  July,  18—,  the  state  of  Mr.  Tit- 
mouse's aftairs  was  this :  he  owed  his  landlady  £1,  9s.  his 
washerwoman,  6s. ;  his  tailor,  £1,  8s. — in  all,  three  guineas ; 
beside  10s,  to  Huckaback,  (for  Tittlebat's  notion  was  that  on 
repayment  at  anytime  of  10s.,  Huckaback  would  be  bound  to 
deliver  up  to  him  the  document  or  voucher  which  he  had 
given  him,)  and  a  weekly  accruing  rent  of  7s.  to  his  landlady, 
besides  some  very  small  sums  for  washing,  tea,  bread,  and 
butter,  &c.  To  meet  these  serious  liabilities,  he  had — not  one 
farthing. 

On  returning  to  his  lodgings  that  night,  he  found  a  line 
from  Thumb-screw,  his  landlady's  broker,  informing  him 
that,  unless  by  ten  o'clock  on  the  next  morning  his  arrears 
of  rent  were  paid,  she  should  distrain,  and  she  would  also 
give  him  notice  to  quit  at  the  end  of  the  week  ;  that  nothing 
could  induce  her  to  give  him  further  time.  He  sat  down  in 
dismay  on  reading  this  threatening  document ;  and,  in  sitting 
down,  his  eyes  fell  on  a  bit  of  paper  lying  on  the  floor,  which 
must  nave  been  thrust  under  the  door.  From  the  marks  on 
it,  it  was  evident  that  he  must  have  trod  upon  it  in  entering. 
It  proved  to  be  a  summons  from  the  court  of  Requests,  for  £1, 
8s.  due  to  Job  Cox,  his  tailor.  He  deposited  it  mechanically 
on  the  table ;  and  for  a  minute  he  dared  hardly  breathe. 

This  seemed  something  really  like  a  crisis. 

After  a  silent  agony  pi  half  an  hour's  duration,  he  rose 
trembling  from  his  chair,  blew  out  his  candle,  and,  in  a  few 
minutes'  time  might  have  been  seen  standing  with  a  pale  and 
troubled  face  before  the  window  of  old  Balls,  the  pawn- 
broker,  peering  through  the  suspended  articles— watches, 
sugar-tongs,  rings,  brooches,  spoons,  pins,  bracelets,  knives 
and  forks,  seals,  chains,  &c. — to  see  whether  any  one  else  than 
old  Balls  were  within.  Having  at  length  watched  out  a  very 
pale  and  wretched-looking  woman,  Titmouse  entered  to  take 
her  place:  and  after  interchanging  a  few  faltering  words 
with  the  white-haired  and  hard-hearted  old  pawnbroker, 
produced  his  guard-chain,  his  breast-pin,  and  his  ring  and  ob- 
tained three  pounds  two  shillings  and  sixpence  on  the  secu- 
rity of  them.  With  this  sum  he  slunk  out  of  the  shop,  and 


112  TEN  THOUSAND  A-YEAR. 

calling  on  Cox,  his  tailor,  paid  his  trembling  old  creditor  the 
full  amount  of  his  claim  (£1,  8s.)  together  with  4s.,  the  ex- 
pense  of  the  summons— simply  asking  a  receipt,  without  utter- 
ing another  word,  for  he  felt  almost  choked.  In  the  same 
way  he  dealt  with  Mrs.  Squallop,  his  landlady— not  uttering 
one  word  in  reply  to  her  profuse  and  voluble  apologies,  but 
pressing  his  lips  between  his  teeth  till  the  blood  came  from 
them,  while  his  heart  seemed  bursting  within  him.  Then  he 
walked  up-stairs,  with  a  desperate  air — with  eighten-pence  in 
'  his  pocket— all  his  ornaments  gone — his  washerwoman  yet 
unpaid— his  rent  going  on— several  other  little  matters  un- 
settled ;  and  the  10th  of  August  approaching,  when  he  expect- 
ed to  be  dismissed  penniless  from  Mr.  Tag-rag's,  and  thrown 
on  his  own  resources  for  subsistence.  When  he  had  regained 
his  room,  and  having  shut  the  door,  had  re-seated  himself  at 
his  table,  he  felt  for  a  moment  as  if  he  could  have  yelled. 
Starvation  and  Despair,  two  fiends,  seemed  sitting  beside  him 
in  shadowy  ghastlmess,  chilling  and  palsying  him— petrify- 
ing his  heart  within  him.  WHAT  WAS  HE  TO  DO?  Why  had 
he  been  born  ?  Why  was  he  so  much  more  persecuted  and 
miserable  than  any  one  else  ?  Visions  of  his  ring,  his  breast- 
pin, his  studs,  stuck  in  a  pit  of  card  with  their  price  written 
above,  and  hanging  exposed  to  his  view  in  old  Ball's  win- 
dow, almost  frenzied  him.  Thoughts  such  as  these  at  length 
began  to  suggest  others  of  a  dreadful  nature.  *  *  *  The 
means  at  that  instant  within  his  reach.  *  *  *  A  sharp 
knock  at  the  door  startled  him  out  of  the  stupor  into  which 
he  was  sinking.  He  listened  for  a  moment,  as  if  he  were  not 
certain  that  the  sound  was  a  real  one.  There  seemed  a  ton- 
weight  upon  his  heart,  which  a  mighty  sigh  could  lift  for  an 
instant,  but  not  remove ;  and  he  was  in  the  act  of  heaving  a 
second  such  sigh,  as  he  languidly  opened  the  door — expecting 
to  encounter  Mr.  Thumbscrew,  or  some  of  his  myrmidons, 
who  might  not  know  of  his  recent  settlement  with  his  land- 
lady. 

"  Is  this  Mr.— Tit— Titmouse's  !  inquired  a  genteel-looking 
young  man. 

"  Yes,"  replied  Titmouse,  sadly. 

*  Are  you  Mr.  Titmouse?" 

"  Yes,"  he  replied,  more  faintly  than  before, 

"  Oh— I  have  brought  you,  sir,  a  letter  from  Mr.  Gammon, 
of  the  firm  of  Quirk,  Gammon,  and  Snap,  solicitors.  Saffron 
Hill,"  said  the  stranger,  unconscious  that  his  words  shot  a 
flash  of  light  into  a  little  abyss  of  sorrow  before  him.  "  He 
begged  me  to  this  give  letter  into  your  hands  and  said  he 
hoped  you'd  send  him  an  answer,  by  the  first  morning's 
post." 

"  Yes— oh— I  see— certainly— to  be  sure— with  pleasure — 
how  is  Mr.  Gammon?— uncommon  kind  of  him— very 
humble  respects  to  him— take  care  to  answer  it,"  stammered 
Titmouse  in  a  breath,  hardly  knowing  whether  he  was  stand 


TEN  THOUSAND  A-YEAE.  113 

ing  on  his  head  or  his  heels,  and  not  quite  certain  where  he 


"Good  evening,  sir,"  replied  the  stranger,  evidently  a 
little  surprised  at  Titmouse's  manner,  and  withdrew.  Tit- 
mouse  shut  his  door.  With  prodigious  trepidation  of  hand 
and  flutter  of  spirits,  he  opened  the  letter  —  an  enclosure 
meeting  his  eyes  in  the  shape  of  a  bank-note. 

"  On  Lord  !  he  murmured,  turning  white  as  the  sheet  of 
paper  lie  held.  Then  the  letter  dropped  from  his  hand,  and 
he  stood  as  if  stupefied  for  some  moments;  but  presently 
rapture  darted  through  him  ;  a  five-pound  bank-note  was  in 
his  hand,  and  it  had  been  enclosed  in  the  following  letter  :  — 

"  35  Thames'1  Inn,  29£A  July,  18— 
"  MY  DEAR  MR.  TITMOUSE, 

"  Your  last  note,  addressed  to  our  firm,  has  given  me  the 
greatest  pain,  and  I  hasten,  on  my  return  from  the  country, 
to  forward  you  the  enclosed  trifle,  which  I  sincerely  hope 
will  be  of  temporary  service  to  you.  May  I  beg  the  favor  of 
your  company  on  Sunday  evening  next,  at  seven  o'clock,  to 
take  a  glass  of  wine  with  me  ?  I  shall  be  quite  alone  and  dis- 
engaged ;  and  may  have  it  in  my  power  to  make  you  some 
important  communications,  concerning  matters  in  which,  I 
assure  you,  I  feel  a  very  deep  interest  on  your  account.  Beg- 
ging the  favor  of  an  early  answer  to-morrow  morning,  I  trust 
you  will  believe  me,  ever,  my  dear  sir,  your  most  faithful 
humble  servant, 

"  OILY  GAMMON. 
"  TITTLEBAT  TITMOUSE,  ESQ." 

The  first  balmy  drop  of  the  long-expected  golden  shower 
had  at  length  fallen  upon  the  panting  Titmouse.  How  po- 
lite —  nay,  how  affectionate  and  respectful—  was  the  note  of 
Mr.  Gammon  !  and,  for  the  first  time  in  his  life,  he  saw  him- 
self addressed 

"  TITTLEBAT  TITMOUSE,  ESQUIRE." 

If  his  room  had  been  large  enough  to  admit  of  it,  Titmouse 
would  have  skipped  round  it  again  and  again  in  his  fran- 
tic ecstacy.  Having  at  length  read  over  and  over  again 
the  blessed  letter  of  Mr.  Gammon,  he  hastily  folded  it  up, 
crumpled  up  the  bank-note  in  his  hand,  clapped  his  hat  on 
his  head,  blew  out  his  candle,  rushed  down-stairs  as  if  a  mad 
dog  were  at  his  heels,  and  in  three  or  four  minutes'  time  was 
standing  breathless  before  old  Balls,  whom  he  almost  electri- 
fied by  asking,  with  an  eager  and  joyous  air,  for  a  return  of 
the  articles  which  he  had  only  an  hour  before  pawned  with 
him  ;  at  the  same  time  laying  down  the  duplicates  and  the 
bank-note.  The  latter,  old  Balls  scrutinized  with  most 
anxious  exactness,  and  even  suspicion—  but  it  seemed  per 
fectly  unexceptionable  ;  so  he  gave  him  back  his  precious 


H4  TEN  THOUSAND  A-TEAE. 

ornaments,  and  the  change  out  of  his  note,  minus  a  trifling 
sum  for  interest.  Titmouse  then  started  off  at  top  speed  to 
Huckaback ;  but  it  suddenly  occurring  to  him  as  possible 
that  that  gentlemen,  on  hearing  of  his  good  fortune,  migit 
look  for  an  immediate  repayment  of  the  ten  shillings  he  tad 
recently  lent  to  Titmouse,  he  stopped  short — paused — ana  re- 
turned home.  There  he  had  hardly  been  seated  a  mo- 
ment, when  down  he  pelted  again,  to  buy  a  sheet  of  paper 
and  a  wafer  or  two,  to  write  his  letter  to  Mr.  Gammon; 
which  having  obtained,  he  returned  at  the  same  speed,  al- 
most overturning  his  fat  landlady,  who  looked  after  him  as 
if  he  were  a  mad  cat  scampering  up  and  down-stairs,  and 
fearing  that  he  had  gone  suddenly  crazy.  The  note  he  wrote 
to  Mr.  Gammon  was  so  exceedingly  extravagant,  that,  can- 
did as  I  have  (f  trust)  hitherto  shown  myself  in  the  deline- 
ation of  Mr.  Titmouse's  character,  I  cannot  bring  myself  to 
give  the  said  letter  to  the  reader — making  all  allowance  for 
the  extraordinary  excitement  of  its  writer. 

Sleep,  that  night  and  morning,  found  and  left  Mr.  Tit- 
mouse the  assured  exulting  master  of  TEN  THOUSAND  A- 
YEAR.  Of  this  fact,  the  oftener  he  read  Mr.  Gammon's  let- 
ter, the  stronger  became  his  convictions.  'Twas  undoubt- 
edly rather  a  large  inference  from  small  premises ;  but  it 
secured  him  unspeakable  happiness,  for  a  time^  at  a  possible 
cost  of  future  disappointment  and  misery,  which  he  did  not 
pause  to  consider.  The  fact  is,  that  logic  (according  to  Dr. 
Watts,  the  right  use  of  reason)  is  not  a  practical  art.  No  one 
regards  it  in  actual  life ;  observe,  therefore,  folks  on  all 
hands  constantly  acting  like  Tittlebat  Titmouse  in  the  case 
before  us.  His  conclusion  was — that  he  had  become  the  cer- 
tain master  of  ten  thousand  a-year ;  his  premises  were  what 
the  reader  has  seen.  I  do  not,  however,  mean  to  say,  that  if 
the  reader  be  a  youth  hot  from  the  University,  he  may  not 
be  able  to  prove,  by  a  very  refined  and  ingenious  argument, 
that  Titmouse  was,  in  what  he  did  above,  a  fine  natural  logi- 
cian ;  for  I  recollect  that  some  great  logician  hath  demon- 
strated, by  a  famous  argument,  that  there  is  NOTHING  in  the 
world ;  and  no  one  that  I  have  heard  of,  hath  ever  been  able 
to  prove  the  contrary. 

By  six  o'clock  the  next  morning,  Titmouse  had,  with  his 
own  hand,  dropped  his  answer  into  the  letter-box  upon  the 
door  of  Mr.  Gammon's  chambers  in  Thayies'  Inn ;  in  which 
answer  he  had,  with  numerous  expressions  of  profound  re- 
spect and  gratitude,  accepted  Mr.  Gammon's  polite  invita- 
tion. A  very  happy  man  felt  Titmouse,  as  he  returned  to 
Oxford  Street ;  entering  Messrs.  Tag-rag's  premises  with  alac- 
rity, just  as  they  were  being  opened,  and  volunteering  his  as. 
sistance  in  numerous  things  beyond  his  usual  province,  with 
singular  briskness  and  energy ;  as  if  conscious  that  by  doing 
so  he  was  greatly  gratifying  Messrs.  Quirk,  Gammon,  and 
bnap,  whose  wishes  upon  the  subject  he  knew.  He  displayed 


TEN  THOUSAND  A-YEAR.  115 

such  unwonted  cheerfulness  and  patient  good-nature  through- 
out the  day,  that  one  of  his  companions,  a  serious  youth,  in  a 
white  neckerchief,  black  clothes,  and  with  a  sanctified  counte- 
nance—the only  professing  pious  person  in  the  establishment 
—took  an  occasion  to  ask  him,  in  a  mysterious  whisper, 
"  whether  he  had  not  got  converted;  "  and  whether  he  would, 
at  sixo'clock  in  the  morning,  accompany  the  speaker  to  a  room 
in  the  neighborhood,  where  he  (the  youth  aforesaid)  was  going 
to  conduct  an  exhortation  and  prayer  meeting !  Titmouse 
refused — but  not  without  a  few  qualms  ;  for  luck  certainly 
seemed  to  be  smiling  on  him,  and  ne  felt  that  he  ought  to  be 
grateful  for  it ;  but  then,  he  at  length  reflected,  the  proper 
place  for  that  sort  of  thing  would  be  a  regular  church — to 
which  he  resolved  to  go.  This  change  of  manners  Tag-rag, 
however,  looked  upon  as  assumed  only  to  affront  him  ;  see- 
ing nothing  but  impertinence  and  defiance  in  all  that  Tit- 
mouse did— as  if  the  nearer  Titmouse  got  to  the  end  of  his 
bondage — i.  e.  the  10th  of  August — the  lighter  hearted  he 
grew.  He  resolved  religiously  to  keep  his  counsel ;  to  avpid 
even — at  all  events  for  the  present — communicating  with 
Huckaback. 

On  the  ensuing  Sunday  he  rose  at  an  earlier  hour  than 
usual,  and  took  nearly  twice  as  long  a  time  as  usual  to  dress 
— by  reason  of  his  often  falling  into  many  delightful  reveries. 
By  eleven  o'clock  he  might  have  been  seen  entering  the  gal- 
lery of  St.  Andrew's  Church,  Holbqrn  ;  where  he  considered 
that  doubtless  Mr.  Gammon,  who  lived  in  the  neighborhood, 
might  attend.  He  asked  three  or  four  pew-openers,  both  be- 
low and  above,  if  they  knew  which  was  Mr.  Gammon's  pew 
— Mr.  Gammon  of  Thavies'  Inn ;  not  dreaming  of  presumptu- 
ously going  to  the  pew,  but  of  sitting  in  some  place  that  com- 
manded a  view  of  it.  Mr.  Gammon,  I  need  hardly  say,  was 
quite  unknown  there— no  one  had  ever  heard  of  such  a  per- 
son :  nevertheless  Titmouse,  albeit  a  little  galled  at  being,  in 
spite  of  his  elegant  appearance,  slipped  into  a  back  pew,  re- 
mained— but  his  thoughts  wandered  grievously  the  whole 
time.  The  service  over,  he  sauntered  in  the  direction  of 
Hyde  Park,  to  saunter  in  which  he  seemed  now  to  have  a 
sort  of  claim.  How  soon  might  he  become,  instead  of  a  mere 
spectator  as  heretofore,  a  partaker  in  its  glories !  The  dawn 
of  the  day  of  fortune  was  on  his  long-benighted  soul ;  and  he 
could  hardly  subdue  his  excited  feelings.  Punctual  to  his 
appointment,  as  the  clock  struck  seven  he  made  his  appear- 
ance at  Mr.  Gammon's,  with  a  pair  of  span-new  white  kid 
gloves  on,  and  was  speedily  ushered,  a  little  flurried,  by  a 
comfortable-looking  elderly  female  servant,  into  Mr.  Gam- 
mon's room.  Mr.  Titmouse  wras  dressed  just  as  when  he  was 
first  presented  to  the  reader,  sallying  forth  into  Oxford 
Street.  Mr.  Gammon,  who  was  sitting  reading  the  Sunday 
Flash  at  a  table  on  which  stood  a  couple  of  decanters, 
several  wine-glasses,  and  two  or  three  dishes  of  fruit,  rose 


116  TEN  THOUSAND  A-YEAE. 

and  received  his  distinguished  visitor  with  the  most  der 
lightful  affability. 

"  I  am  most  happy,  Mr.  Titmouse,  to  see  you  in  this  friend- 
ly way,"  said  he,  shaking  him  by  the  hand. 

"  Oh,  don't  name  it,  sir,"  quoth  Titmouse  rather  indis- 
tinctly, and  hastily  running  his  hand  through  his  hair. 

"  I've  nothing,  you  see,  to  offer  you  but  a  little  fruit,  and  a 
glass  of  fair  port  or  sherry." 

"  Particular  fond  of  them,  sir,"  replied  Titmouse,  endeav- 
oring to  clear  his  throat ;  for  in  spite  of  a  strong  effort  to 
appear  at  his  ease,  he  was  unsuccessful;  so  that  when  Gam- 
mon's keen  eye  glanced  at  the  bedizened  figure  of  his  guest,  a 
bitter  smile  passed  over  his  face,  without  having  been  observ- 
ed. "  This,  thought  he  as  his  eye  passed  from  the  ring  glitter- 
ing on  the  little  finger  of  the  right  hand,  to  the  studs  and 
breast-pin  in  the  shirt  front,  and  thence  to  the  guard-chain 
glaring  entirely  outside  a  damson-colored  satin  waistcoat, 
and  the  spotless  white  glove  which  yet  glistened  on  the  left 
hand—"  This  is  the  writer  of  the  dismal  epistle  of  the  other 
day,  announcing  his  desperation  and  destitution!" 

"  Your  health,  Mr.  Titmouse !— help  yourself !  "  said  Mr. 
Gammon,  in  a  cheerful  and  cordial  tone  ;  Titmouse  pouring 
out  a  glass  only  three-quarters  full,  raised  it  to  his  lips  with 
a  slightly  tremulous  hand,  and  returned  Mr.  Gammon  s  salu- 
tation. When  had  Titmouse  tasted  a  glass  of  wine  before  ?— 
a  reflection,  occurring  not  only  to  himself,  but  also  to  Gam- 
mon, to  whom  it  was  a  circumstance  that  might  be  service- 
able. 

"  You  see,  Mr.  Titmouse,  mine's  only  a  small  bachelor's  es- 
tablishment, and  I  cannot  put  my  old  servant  out  of  the  way 
by  having  my  friends  to  dinner" — [quite  forgetting  that  the 
day  before  he  had  entertained  at  least  six  friends,  including 
Mr.  Frankpledge— but,  the  idea  of  going  through  a  dinner 
with  Mr.  Titmouse  !  ] 

And  now,  O  inexperienced  Titmouse  unacquainted  with 
the  potent  qualities  of  wine,  I  warn  you  to  be  cautious  how 
you  drink  many  glasses,  for  you  cannot  calculate  the  effect 
which  they  will  have  upon  you ;  and,  indeed,  methinks  that 
with  this  man  you  have  a  game  to  play  which  will  not  admit 
of  much  wine  being  drunk.  Be  you,  therefore,  on  your  guard ; 
for  wine  is  like  a  strong  serpent,  who  will  creep  unperceiyed- 
ly  into  your  empty  head,  and  coil  himself  up  therein,  until  at 
length  he  moves  about— and  all  things  are  as  naught  to  you ! 

"  Oh,  sir,  'pon  my  honor,  I  beg  you  won't  name  it— all  one 
to  me,  sir !— Beautiful  wine  this,  sir." 

"  Pretty  fair,  I  think— certainly  rather  old  :— but  what  fruit 
will  you  take — currant  or  cherries  ?  " 

'•  Why— a— I've  so  lately  dined,"  replied  Titmouse,  allud- 
ing to  an  exceedingly  slight  repast  at  a  coffee-shop  about 
two  o'clock.  He  could  have  preferred  the  cherries,  but  did 
not  feel  quite  at  his  ease  how  to  dispose  of  the  stones  nicely— 


TEN  THOUSAND  A-YEAH.  317 

gracefully — so  he  took  a  very  few  red  currants  upon  his  plate, 
and  eat  them  slowly,  and  with  a  modest  air. 

"  Well,  Mr.  Titmouse,"  commenced  Gammon  with  an 
air  of  concern,  "  I  was  really  much  distressed  by  your 
last  letter." 

"  Uncommon  glad  to  hear  it  sir— know  you  would,  sir — 
you're  so  kind-hearted ; — all  quite  true,  sir ! 

"  I  had  no  idea  that  you  were  reduced  to  such  straits," 
said  Gammon  in  a  sympathizing  tone,  but  setting  his  eye 
involuntarily  on  the  ring  of  Titmouse. 

"  Quite  dreadful,  sir — 'pon  my  soul,  dreadful ;  and  such 
usage  at  Mr.  Tag-rag's !  " 

"  But  you  mustn't  think  of  going  abroad— away  from  all 
your  friends,  Mr.  Titmouse." 

"  Abroad,  sir  ! "  interrupted  Titmouse  with  anxious  bnt 
subdued  eagerness ;  "  never  thought  of  such  a  thing !  " 

"  Oh !  I— 1  thought— 

"  There  isn't  a  word  of  truth  in  it,  sir ;  and  if  you've  heard 
so  it  must  have  been  from  that  oudacious  fellow  that  called 
on  you— he's  such  a  liar— if  you  knew  him  as  well  as  I  do, 
sir  ! "  said  Titmouse  with  a  confident  air,  quite  losing  sight 
of  his  letter  to  Messrs.  Quirk,  Gammon  and  Snap—"  No,  sir 
— shall  stay  and  stick  to  friends  that  stick  to  me." 

"  Take  another  glass  of  wine,  Mr.  Titmouse,"  interrupted 
Gammon  cordially,  and  Titmouse  obeyed  him ;  but  while  he 
was  pouring  it  out,  a  sudden  recollection  of  his  letter  flashed 
across  his  mind,  satisfied  him  that  he  stood  detected  in  a  flat 
lie  before  Mr.  Gammon  ;  and  he  blushed  scarlet. 

"  Do  you  like  the  sherry  ? "  enquired  Gammon  perfectly 
aware  of  what  was  passing  through  the  mind  of  his  guest,  and 
wishing  to  divert  his  thoughts.  Titmouse  answered  in  the 
affirmative ;  and  proceeded  to  pour  forth  such  a  number  of 
apologies  for  his  own  behavior  at  Saffron  Hill,  and  that  of 
Huckaback  on  the  subsequent  occasion,  as  Gammon  found  it 
difficult  to  stop,  over  and  over  again  assuring  him  that  all  had 
been  forgiven  and  forgotten.  Then  Titmouse  came  to  the  re- 
mittance of  the  five  pounds 

"  Don't  mention  it,  my  dear  sir,"  interrupted  Gammon 
very  blandly;  "  it  gave  me,  I  assure  you,  far  greater  satisfac- 
tion to  send  it,  than  you  to  receive  it.  I  hope  it  has  a  little 
relieved  you?" 

"  I  think  so,  sir!    I  was,  'pon  my  life,  on  my  last  legs." 

"  When  things  come  to  the  worst,  they  often  mend,  Mr.  Tit- 
mouse !  I  told  Mr.  Quirk  (who  to  do  him  justice,  came  at 
last  into  my  views)  that,  however  premature,  and  perhaps  im- 
prudent it  might  be  in  us  to  go  so  far,  I  could  not  help  reliev- 
ing your  present  necessities,  even  out  of  my  own  resources." 

[Oh,  Gammon,  Gammon!] 

"  How  uncommon  kind  of  you,  sir ! "  exclaimed  Titmouse. 

"  Not  in  the  least,  my  dear 'sir— (pray  fill  another  glass,  Mr. 
Titmouse ! )  You  see  Mr.  Quirk  is  quite  a  man  of  business— 


118  TEN  THOUSAND  A-YEAR. 

and  our  profession  too  often  affords  instances  of  persons  whose 
hearts  contract  as  their  purses  expand,  Mr.  Titmouse — ha ! 
ha !  Indeed,  those  who  make  their  money  as  hard  as  Mr. 
Quirk,  are  apt  to  be  slow  at  parting  with  it,  and  very  suspi- 
cions." 

"  Well,  I  hope  no  offence,  sir ;  but  really  I  thought  as  much, 
directly  I  saw  that  old  gent." 

"  Ah — but  now  he  is  embarked,  heart  and  soul,  in  the 
affair." 

"  No!    Is  he  really,  sir?"  enquired  Titmouse,  eagerly. 

"  That  is,"  replied  Gammon  quickly,  "  so  long  as  I  am  at 
his  elbow,  urging  him  on  -for  he  wants  some  one  who — hem ! 
In  fact,  my  dear  sir,  ever  since  I  had  the  good  fortune  to 
make  the  discovery,  which  happily  brought  us  acquainted 
with  each  other,  Mr.  Titmouse,  [it  was  old  Quirk  who  had 
made  the  discovery,  and  Gammon  had  for  a  long  time  thrown 
cold  water  on  it,]  "  I  have  been  doing  all  I  could  with  him, 
and  I  trust  I  may  say  have  at  last  got  the  thing  into  shape. 

"  I'll  take  my  oath,  sir,"  said  Titmouse  excitedly.  "  I  never 
was  so  much  struck  with  any  one  in  all  my  born  days  as  I 
was  with  you,  sir,  when  you  first  came  to  my  emp — to  Mr. 
Tag-rag's  sir— Lord,  sir,  how  uncommon  sharp  you  seemed ! " 
Gammon  smiled  with  a  deprecating  air,  and  sipped  his  wine 
in  silence ;  but  there  was  a  great  sweetness  in  the  expression 
of  his  countenance.  Poor  Titmouse's  doubts,  hopes, 
and  fears,  were  rapidly  subsiding  into  a  reverence  for  Gam- 
mon !  *  *  *  * 

"  I  certainly  quite  agree  with  Mr.  Quirk,"  said  Gammon 
presently,  "  that  the  difficulties  in  our  way  are  of  the  most 
serious  description.  To  speak,  for  an  instant  only,  of  the  risk 
we  ourselves  incur  personally— would  you  believe  it,  my  dear 
Mr.  Titmouse  ?— in  such  a  disgraceful  state  are  our  laws,  that 
we  can't  gratify  our  feelings  by  taking  up  your  cause,  with- 
out rendering  ourselves  liable  to  imprisonment  for  Heaven 
knows  how  long,  and  a  fine  that  would  be  ruin  itself,  if  we 
should  be  found  put !  " 

Titmouse  continued  silent,  his  wine-glass  in  his  hand  ar- 
rested in  its  way  to  his  mouth ;  which,  together  with  his 
eyes,  were  opened  to  their  widest  extent,  as  he  stared  with 
a  kind  of  terror  upon  Mr.  Gammon.—"  Are  we,  then,  unrea- 
sonable, my  dear  sir,  in  entreating  you  to  be  cautious— nay, 
in  insisting  on  your  compliance  with  our  wishes,  in  all  that 
we  shall  deem  prudent  and  necessary,  when  not  only  your 
own  best  interests,  but  our  characters,  liberties,  and  fortunes 
are  staked  on  the  issue  of  this  great  enterprise  ?  I  am  sure," 
continued  Gammon,  with  great  emotion,  "  you  will  feel  for 
us,  Mr.  Titmouse.  I  see  you  do !  "  Gammon  put  his  hand 
over  his  eyes,  in  order,  apparently,  to  conceal  nis  emotion, 
but  really  to  observe  what  effect  he  had  produced  upon  Tit- 
mouse. The  C9njoint  influence  of  Gammon's  wine  and  elo- 
quence not  a  little  agitated  Titmouse,  in  whose  eyes  stood 
tears. 


TEN  THOUSAND  A-YEAR.  119 

"I'll  do  anything — anything,  sir,"  he  almost  sobbed. 

"  Oh !  all  we  wish  is  to  be  allowed  to  serve  you  effectually ; 
and  to  enable  us  to  do  that ' ' 

"  Tell  me  to  get  into  a  soot-bag,  and  lie  hid  in  a  coal-hole, 
and  see  if  I  won't  do  it ! " 

"  What !  a  coal-hole  ?  Would  you,  then,  even  stop  at 
Tag-rag  and  Go's  ?  " 

"  Ye-e-e-e-s,  sir— hem !  hem  !  That  is  till  the  tenth  of  next 
month,  when  my  time's  up." 

"Ay!— ay! — oh,  I  understand!  Another  glass,  Mr.  Tit- 
mouse," said  Gammon,  pouring  himself  out  some  more  wine  ; 
and  observing,  while  Titmouse  followed  his  example,  that 
there  was  an  unsteadiness  in  his  motions  of  a  very  different 
description  from  that  which  he  had  exhibited  at  the  com- 
mencement of  the  evening— at  the  same  time  wondering 
what  the  dence  they  should  do  with  him  after  the  tenth  of 
August. 

"  i  ou  see,  I  have  the  utmost  confidence  in  you,  and  had  so 
from  the  first  happy  moment  when  we  met ;  but  Mr.  Quirk 

is  rather  sus In  short,  to  prevent  misunderstanding  (as 

he  says,)  Mr.  Quirk  is  anxious  that  you  should  give  a  written 
promise."  (Titmouse  looked  eagerly  about  for  writing  ma- 
terials.) "No,  not  now,  but  in  a  day  or  two's  time.  I  con- 
fess, my  dear  Mr.  Titmouse,  if  1  might  have  decided  on  the 
matter,  I  should  have  been  satisfied  with  your  verbal  prom- 
ise ;  but,  I  must  say,  Mr.  Quirk's  gray  hairs  seem  to  have 
made  him  quite— eh !  you  understand  ?  Don't  you  think  so, 
Mr.  Titmouse  ?  " 

"  To  be  sure  !  'pon  my  honor,  Mr.  Gammon  ! "  replied  Tit- 
mouse ;  not  very  distinctly  understanding,  however,  what  he 
was  so  energetically  assenting  to. 

"  I  dare  say  you  wonder  why  we  wish  you  to  stop  a  few 
months  longer  at  your  present  hiding-place— at  Tag-rag's  ?" 

"  Can't,  possibly !— after  the  tenth  of  next  month,  sir,"  re- 
plied Titmouse,  eagerly. 

"  But  as  soon  as  we  begin  to  fire  off  our  guns  against  the 
enemy— Lord,  my  dear  sir,  if  they  could  only  find  out,  you 
know,  where  to  get  at  you— you  would  never  live  to  enjoy 
your  ten  thousand  a-year !  They'd  either  poison  or  kidnap 
you— get  you  out  of  the  way,  unless  you  keep  out  of  their 
way  :  and  if  you  will  but  consent  to  keep  snug  at  Tag-rag's 
for  a  while,  who'd  suspect  where  you  was?  We  could 
easily  arrange  with  your  friend  Tag-rag  that  you  should — 

"My  stars  !  I'd  give  something  to  hear  you  tell  Tag-rag- 
why,  I  wonder  what  he'll  do !  " 

"  Make  you  very  comfortable,  and  let  you  have  your  own 
way  in  everything— that  you  may  rely  upon  ?  " 

"  Go  to  the  play,  for  instance,  whenever  I  want,  and  do  all 
that  sort  of  thing?" 

"  Nay,  try !  anything ! — And  as  for  money,  I've  persuaded 
Mr.  Quirk  to  consent  to  our  advancing  you  a  certain  sum 


120  TEN  THOUSAND  A-TEAtt. 

per  weeK.  from  the  present  time,  while  the  cause  is  going 
on,'' —(Titmouse's  heart  began  to  beat  fast,)— "in  order  to 
place  you  above  absolute  inconvenience  ;  and  when  you  con- 
sider the  awful  sums  we  shall  have  to  disburse — cash  out  of 
pocket— (the  tongues  of  counsel,  you  know,  are  set  on  gold 
springs,  and  only  gold  keys  open  their  lips  !)— for  courWees, 
and  other  indispensable  matters,  I  should  candidly  say  that 
four  thousand  pounds  of  hard  cash  out  of  pocket,  advanced 
by  our  firm  in  your  case,  would  be  the  very  lowest."  (Tit- 
mouse stared  at  him  with  an  expression  of  stupid  wonder.) 
"  Yes— four  thousand  pounds,  Mr.  Titmouse,  at  the  very 
least— the  very  least."  Again  he  paused,  keenly  scrutiniz- 
ing Titmouse's  features  by  the  light  of  the  candles,  which  just 
then  were  brought  in.  "You  seem  surprised,  Mr.  Titmouse." 

"  Why— why— where's  all  the  money  to  come  from,  sir  ?" 
exclaimed  Titmouse,  aghast. 

"  Ah !  that  is  indeed  a  fearful  question,"  replied  Gammon, 
with  a  very  serious  air ;  "  but  at  my  request,  our  firm  has 
agreed  to  make  the  necessary  advances ;  and  also  (for  2  could 
not  bear  the  sight  of  your  distress,  Mr.  Titmouse !)  to  supply 
your  necessities  liberally  in  the  mean  time,  as  I  was  saying. 

"  Won't  you  take  another  glass  of  wine,  Mr.  Gammon  ?  " 
suddenly  inquired  Titmouse,  with  a  confident  air. 

"  With  all  my  heart,  Mr.  Titmouse  !  I'm  delighted  that 
you  approve  of  it.  I  paid  enough  for  it,  I  can  warrant  you." 

"  Cuss  me  if  ever  I  tasted  such  wine !  Uncommon !  Come 
— no  heel-taps,  Mr.  Gammon — here  goes — let's  drink— success 
to  the  affair !  " 

"  With  all  my  heart,  my  dear  sir — with  all  my  heart. 
Success  to  the  thing — amen!"  and  Gammon  drained  his 
glass;  so  did  Titmouse.  "Ah!  Mr.  Titmouse,  you'll  soon 
nave  wine  enough  to  float  a  frigate— and  indeed  what  not 
— with  ten  thousand  a-year  ?  " 

"  And  all  the  back-rents,  you  know— ha,  ha !  " 

"  Yes— to  be  sure ! — the  back-rents !  The  sweetest  estate 
that  is  to  be  found  in  all  Yorkshire !  Gracious,  Mr.  Tit- 
mouse !  "  continued  Gammon,  with  an  excited  air—"  What 
may  you  not  do  ?  Go  where  you  like— do  what  you  like— get 
into  Parliament— marry  some  lovely  woman ! " 

"  Lord,  Mr.  Gammon  !— you  a'n't  dreaming  ?  Nor  I  ?  But 
now,  in  course,  you  must  be  paid  handsome  for  your  trouble  ! 
— Only  say  how  much— Name  your  sum !  What  you  please ! 
You  only  give  me  all  you've  said." 

"  For  my  part  I  wish  to  rely  entirely  on  your  mere  word 
of  honor.  Between  gentlemen,  you  know — my  dear  sir — 

"  You  only  try  me,  sir." 

"But  you  see,  Mr.  Quirk's  getting  old,  and  naturally  is 
anxious  to  provide  for  those  whom  he  will  leave  behind  him 
—and  so  Mr.  Snap  agreed  with  him— two  to  one  against  me 
Mr.  Titmouse— of  course  they  carried  the  day— two  to  one." 

"  Only  say  the  figure,  sir ! "  cried  Titmouse,  eagerly. 


TEN  THOUSAND  A-TEAR.  121 

"  A  single  year's  income,  only — ten  thousand  pounds  will 
hardly" 

"Ten  thousand  pounds!  By  jingo,  that  is  a  slice  out  of 
the  cake !  Oh,  Lord  ! "  quoth  Titmouse,  looking  aghast. 

"  A  mere  crumb,  my  dear  sir !— a  trifle !  Why,  we  are  go- 
ing to  give  you  that  sum  at  least  every  year— and  indeed  it 
was  suggested  to  our  firm,  that  unless  you  gave  us  at  least  a 
sum  of  twenty-five  thousand  pounds— in  fact,  we  are  recom- 
mended to  look  out  for  some  other  heir." 

"Oh  dear!  oh,  Mr.  Gammon,"  cried  Titmouse,  hastily— 
"  it's  not  to  be  thought  of,  sir !  " 

"  So  I  said  ;  and  as  for  throwing  it  up— to  be  sure  we  shall 
have  ourselves  to  borrow  large  sums  to  carry  on  the  war— 
and  unless  we  have  your  bond  for  at  least  ten  thousand 
pounds,  we  cannot  raise  a  farthing." 

"  Well—curse  me,  if  you  sha'n't  do  what  you  like  !— Give 
me  your  hand,  and  do  what  you  like,  Mr.  Gammon !  " 

"  Thank  you,  Mr.  Titmouse !  How  I  like  a  glass  of  wine 
with  a  friend  in  this  quiet  way  !— you'll  always  find  me  re- 
joiced to  show— 

"  Your  hand !  By  George — Didn't  I  take  a  liking  to  you 
from  the  first  ?  But  to  speak  my  mind  a  bit— as  for  Mr. 
Quirk — excuse  me — but  lie's  a  cur — cur — mudg — mudg — 
mudg — eon — hem  ! " 

"  Hope  you've  not  been  so  imprudent,  my  dear  Titmouse," 
threw  in  Mr.  Gammon,  rather  anxiously,  "  as  to  borrow 
money — eh  ?  " 

"  Devil  knows,  and  devil  cares  !  No  stamp,  I  know — bang 
up  to  the  mark," — here  he  winked  an  eye,  and  put  his  finger 
to  his  nose — "  wide  awake — Huck — uck — uck — uck !  how  his 
name  sti — sticks.  Your  hand,  Mr.  Gammon — here — this, 
this  way — what  are  you  bobbing  your  head  about  for  ?  Ah, 
ha ! — The  floor — 'pon  my  life— how  funny — it's  like  being  at 
sea— up,  down— on  dear !  " — he  clapped  his  hand  to  his  head. 
[Pythagoras  has  finely  observed,  that  a  man  is  not  to  be 
considered  dead  drunk  till  he  lies  on  the  floor,  and  stretches 
out  his  arms  and  legs  to  prevent  his  going  lower.] 

See-saw,  see-saw,  up  and  down,  up  and  down,  went  every- 
thing about  him.  Now  he  felt  sinking  through  the  floor, 
then  gently  rising  to  the  ceiling.  Mr.  Gammon  seemed  get- 
ting into  a  mist  and  waving  about  the  candles  in  it.  Mr.  Tit- 
mouse's head  swam  ;  his  chair  seemed  to  be  resting  on  the 
waves  of  the  sea. 

"  I'm  afraid  the  room's  rather  close,  Mr.  Titmouse,"  hastily 
observed  Gammon,  perceiving  from  Titmouse's  sudden  pale- 
ness and  silence,  but  too  evident  symptoms  that  his  powerful 
intellect  was  for  a  while  paralyzed.  Gammon  started  to  the 
window  and  opened  it.  Paler,  however,  and  paler  became 
Titmouse.  Gammon's  game  was  up  much  sooner  than  he 
had  calculated  on. 

"  Mrs.  Brown !  Mrs.  Brown !  order  a  cab  instantly,  and 


122  TEN  THOUSAND  A-TEAB. 

tell  Tomkins,"— that  was  the  inner  porter—"  to  get  his  son 
ready  to  go  home  with  this  gentleman— he's  not  very  well." 
He  was  obeyed.  It  was  in  truth,  all  up  with  Titmouse— at 
least  for  a  while. 

As  soon  as  Gammon  had  thus  got  rid  of  his  distinguished 
guest,  he  ordered  the  table  to  be  cleared  of  the  glasses,  and 
tea  to  be  ready  within  half  an  hour.  He  then  walked  out  to 
enjoy  the  cool  evening ;  on  returning,  sat  pleasantly  sipping 
his  tea,  noAv  and  then  dipping  into  the  edifying  columns  of 
the  Sunday  flash,  but  oftener  ruminating  upon  his  recent 
conversation  with  Titmouse,  and  speculating  upon  certain 
possible  results  to  himself  personally ;  and  a  little  after 
eleven  o'clock,  that  good  man,  at  peace  with  all  the  world — 
calm  and  serene  retired  to  repose.  He  had  that  night 
rather  a  singular  dream  ;  it  was  of  a  snake  encircling  a 
monkey,  as  if  in  gentle  and  playful  embrace.  Suddenly 
tightening  its  folds  a  crackling  sound  was  heard  ;  the  writh- 
ing coils  were  then  slowly  unwound — and,  with  a  shudder, 
he  beheld  the  monster  licking  over  the  motionless  figure,  till 
it  was  covered  with  a  viscid  slime.  Then  the  serpent  began 
to  devour  its  prey ;  and,  when  gorged  and  helpless,  behold, 
it  was  immediately  fallen  upon  by  two  other  snakes.  To  his 
disturbed  fancy,  there  was  a  dim  resemblance  between  their 
heads  and  those  of  Quirk  and  Snap— they  all  three  became 
intertwisted  together— and  writhed  and  struggled  till  they 
fall  over  the  edge  of  a  dark  and  frightful  precipice — he  woke 
—thank  God ;  it  was  only  a  dream. 


CHAPTER  Y. 

WHEN,  after  his  return  from  Mr.  Gammon's  chambers,  at 
Thavies'  Inn.  Titmouse  woke  at  an  early  hour  in  the  morn- 
ing, he  was  laboring  under  the  ordinary  effects  of  unac- 
customed inebriety.  His  mouth  and  lips  were  perfectly 
parched  ;  there  was  a  horrid  weight  pressing  on  his  aching 
eyes,  and  upon  his  throbbing  head.  His  pillow  seemed  un- 
dulating beneath  him,  and  everything  swimming  around 
him  :  but  when,  to  crown  the  whole,  he  was  roused  from  a 
momentary  nap  by  the  insupportable— the  loathed  impor- 
tunities of  Mrs.  Squallop,  that  he  would  just  sit  up  and  par- 
take of  three  thick  rounds  of  hot  buttered  toast,  and  a  great 
basin  of  smoking  tea,  which  would  do  him  so  much  good,  and 
settle  his  stomach— at  all  events,  if  he'd  only  have  a  thimble- 
ful of  good  gin  in  it— poor  Titmouse  was  fairly  overcome.  He 
lay  in  bed  all  that  day,  during  which  he  underwent  very 
severe  sufferings  ;  and  it  was  not  till  towards  night  that  he 
began  to  have  anything  like  a  distinct  recollection  of  the 
evening  he  had  spent  with  Mr.  Gammon ;  who,  by  the  way,  had 
sent  one  of  the  clerks,  during  the  afternoon,  to  inquire  after 


TEN  THOUSAND  A-TEAE.  123 

him.  He  did  not  get  out  of  bed  on  the  Tuesday  till  past 
tvyelve  o'clock,  when,  in  a  very  rickety  condition,  he  made 
his  appearance  at  the  shop  of  Messrs.  Tag-rag  and  Co :  on  ap- 
proaching which  he  felt  a  sudden  faintness,  arising  from 
mingled  apprehension  and  disgust. 

"  What  are  you  doing  here,  sir  ?— You're  no  longer  in  my 
employment,  sir,"  exclaimed  Tag-rag,  attempting  to  speak 
calmly,  as  he  hurried  down  the  shop  white  with  rage,  to 
meet  Titmouse,  and  planted  himself  right  in  the  way  of  his 
languid  and  pallid  shopman. 

"  Sir !  "  faintly  exclaimed  Titmouse,  with  his  hat  in  his 
hand. 

"  Very  much  obliged,  sir — very !  by  the  offer  of  your  valu- 
able services'  "  said  Tag-rag.  "  But— that's  the  way  put  again, 
sir— that !-  there  !— good  morning,  sir— good  morning,  sir ! — 
that's  the  way  out  "—and  he  egged  on  Titmouse,  till  he  had 
got  him  fairly  into  the  street— with  infinite  difficulty  restrain- 
ing himself  from  giving  him  a  parting  kick.  Titmouse  stood 
for  a  moment  before  the  door,  trembling  and  aghast,  looking 
in  a  bewildered  manner  at  the  shop;  but  Tag-rag  again 
making  his  appearance,  Titmouse  slowly  walked  a'syay  and 
returned  to  his  lodging.  Oh  that  Mr.  Gammon  had  witnessed 
the  scene — thought  he — and  so  have  been  satisfied  that  it  had 
been  Tag-rag  who  had  put  an  end  to  his  service,  not  he  him- 
self who  had  quitted  it ! 

The  next  day  about  the  same  hour,  Mr.  Gammon  made  his 
appearance  at  the  establishment  from  which  Titmouse  had 
been  expelled  so  summarily,  and  enquired  for  Mr.  Tag-rag, 
who  presently  presented  himself — and  recognizing  Mr.  Gam- 
mon, who  naturally  reminded  him  of  Titmouse,  changed 
color  a  little. 

"What  did  you  please  to  want,  sir?"  inquired  Mr.  Tag- 
rag,  with  a  would-be  resolute  air,  twirling  round  his  watch- 
key  with  some  energy. 

Only  a  few  minutes'  conversation,  sir,  if  you  please,"  said 
Mr.  Gammon,  with  such  a  significant  manner  as  a  little  dis- 
turbed Mr.  Tag-rag-  who,  with  an  ill-supported  sneer, bowed 
very  low,  and  led  the  way  to  his  own  little  room.  Having 
closed  the  door,  he  with  an  exceedingly  civil  air,  begged  Mr. 
Gammon  to  be  seated  ;  and  then  occupied  the  chair  opposite 
to  him,  and  awaited  the  issue  with  ill-disguised  anxiety. 

"  I  am  very  sorry,  Mr.  Tag-rag,"  commenced  Gammon, 
with  his  usual  elegant  and  feeling  manner,  "  that  any  mis- 
understanding should  have  arisen  between  you  and  Mr. 
Titmouse." 

"  You're  a  lawyer,  sir,  I  suppose  ?  "  Mr.  Gammon  bo\yed. 
"  Then  you  must  know,  sir,  that  there  are  always  two  sides 
to  a  quarrel." 

•'  Yes — you  are  right,  Mr.  Tag-rag :  and,  having  already 
heard  Mr.  Titmouse's  version,  may  I  be  favored  with  your 
account  of  your  reasons  for  dismissing  him  ?  For  he  tells  us 


124  TEN  THOUSAND  A-YEAR. 

that  yesterday  you  dismissed  him  suddenly  from  your  em- 
ployment, without  giving  any  warn— 

"So  I  did  sir;  and  what  of  that?"  enquired  Tag-rag, 
tossing  his  head  with  an  air  of  defiance.  •'  Things  are  come 
to  a  pretty  pass  indeed,  when  a  man  can't  dismiss  a  drunken, 
idle,  impudent,  impertinent— abusive  vagabond " 

"  Do  you  seriously  charge  him  with  being  such  a  character, 
land  can  you  prove  your  charges,  Mr.  Tag-rag  ?  "  inquired 
'Gammon,  gravely. 

"  Prove  'em !  yes,  sir,  a  hundred  times  over ;  so  will  all  my 
young  men ! " 

"  And  in  a  court  of  justice,  Mr.  Tag-rag  ?  " 

"  Oh !  he  is  going  to  law,  is  he  ?  That's  why  you're  come 
here — ah,  ha ! — when  you  can  make  a  silk  purse  out  of  a  sow's 
ear,  you  may  get  your  bill  out  of  Mr.  Tittlebat  Titmouse  !— 
ha,  ha,  ha !  "  laughed  Tag-rag,  hoping  thereby  to  conceal  how 
much  he  was  really  startled. 

"  Well— that's  our  look-out,  Mr.  Tag-rag :  to  Mr.  Titmouse, 
his  character  is  as  valuable  as  Mr.  Tag-rag's  is  to  him.  In 
short,  he  has  placed  himself  in  our  hands,  and  we  are  re- 
solved to  go  on  with  the  case,  if  it  cost  us  a  hundred  pounds 
— we  are  indeed,  Mr.  Tag-rag." 

"  Why — he's  not  a  penny  in  the  world  to  go  to  law  with  ! " 
exclaimed  Tag-rag,  with  an  air  of  mingled  wonder,  scorn, 
and  alarm. 

"But  you  forget,  Mr.  Tag-rag,  that  if  Mr.  Titmouse's  ac- 
count snould  turn  out  to  be  correct  it  will,  be  your  pocket 
that  must  pay  all  the  expenses,  amounting  probably  to 
twenty  times  the  sum  which  the  law  may  award  to  Mr.  Tit- 
mouse." 

" Law,  sir !— It's  not  justice! — I  hate  law.— Give  me  com- 
mon sense  and  common  honesty !  " 

"  Both  of  them  would  condemn  your  conduct,  Mr.  Tag-rag ; 
for  I  have  heard  a  full  account  of  what  Mr.  Titmouse  has 
suffered  at  your  hands — of  the  cause  of  your  sudden  warning 
to  him,  and  your  still  more  sudden  dismissal  of  yesterday. 
Oh,  Mr.  Tag-rag !  upon  my  honor,  it  won't  do— not  for  a  mo- 
ment—and should  you  go  on,  rely  upon  what  I  tell  you,  that 
1  it  will  cost  you  dear." 

"  And  suppose,  sir,"  said  Tag-rag,  in  a  would-be  contemptu- 
ous tone—'1 1  should  have  witnesses  to  prove  all  I've  said— 
which  of  us  will  look  funny  then,  sir  ?  " 

"  Which,  indeed !  However,  since  that  is  your  humor,  I 
can  only  assure  you  that  Mr.  Titmouse  defies  you  to  prove 
any  misconduct  on  his  part.  We  have  taken  up  his  cause, 
and,  as  you  may  perhaps  find,  we  shall  not  easily  let  it  drop.'5 
«  u'  \  mean  no  offence>  sir>"  said  Tag-rag,  in  a  mitigated  tone  ; 

but  1  must  say,  that  ever  since  you  first  came  here.  Tit- 
mouse has  been  quite  another  person.  He  seems  not  to  know 
who  I  am,  nor  to  care  either— and  he's  perfectly  unbear- 
able." 


TEN  THOUSAND  A- YEAR.  125 

"My  dear  sir,  what  has  he  said  or  done? — that,  you  know, 
is  what  you  must  be  prepared  to  prove." 

"  Well,  sir !  and  which  of  us  is  likely  to  be  best  off  for 
witnesses  ? — Think  of  that,  sir— I've  eighteen  young  men " 

"  We  shall  chance  that,  sir,"  replied  Gammon,  shrugging 
his  shoulders;  "but  again,  I  ask,  what  did  you  dismiss  him 
for  ?  and  I  request  a  plain,  straight-forward  answer." 

"  What  did  I  dismiss  him  for  ?— Haven't  I  eyes  and  ears  ? — 
First  and  foremost  he's  the  most  odious-mannered  fellow  I 
ever  came  near— and— he  hadn't  a  shirt  to  his  back  when  I 
first  took  him — the  ungrateful  wretch  ! — Sir,  it's  not  against 
the  law,  I  suppose,  to  hate  a  man  ;— and  if  it  isn't,  how  I  hate 
Titmouse!" 

"  Mr.  Tag-rag  " — said  Gammon,  lowering  his  voice,  and 
looking  very  earnestly  at  his  companion — "  can  I  say  a  word 
to  you  in  confidence — the  strictest  confidence ! " 

"What's  it  about,  sir  ?"  inquired  Tag-rag,  with  an  appre- 
hensive air. 

"  I  dare  say  you  may  have  felt,  perhaps,  rather  suprised  at 
the  interest  which  I — in  fact  our  office,  the  office  of  Quirk. 
Gammon,  and  Snap,  in  Saffron  Hill — appear  to  have  taken 
in  Mr.  Titmouse." 

"Why,  sir,  it's  your  look-out  to  see  how  you're  to  be  paid 
for  what  you're  doing — and  I  dare  say  lawyers  generally  keep 
a  pretty  sharp  look-out  in  that  direction." 

Gammon  smiled,  and  continued—"  It  may,  perhaps,  a  lit- 
tle surprise  you,  Mr.  Tag-rag,  to  hear  that  your  present 
(ought  I  to  say,  your  late  f)  shopman,  Mr.  Tittlebat  Titmouse, 
is  at  this  moment  probably  the  very  luckiest  man  in  this 
kingdom.'' 

''Why — you  don't  mean  to  say  he's  drawn  a  prize  in  the 
lottery?" — exclaimed  Tag-rag,  pricking  up  his  ears. 

"  Pho !  my  dear  sir,  that  is  a  mere  trifle  compared  with  the 
good  fortune  that  has  befallen  him.  I  solemnly  assure  you 
that  I  believe  he  will  turn  out  to  be  the  undoubted  owner  of 
an  estate  worth  at  least  ten  thousand  a-year,  besides  a  vast 
accumulation  of  ready  money !  " 

"  Ten  thousand  a-year,  sir  !— My  Titmouse  ! — Tittlebat 
Titmouse !— Ten  thousand  a-year !  "  faltered  Tag-rag,  after 
a  pause,  having  gone  as  pale  as  death. 

I  have  as  little  doubt  of  the  fact,  as  I  have  that  you  yes- 
terday turned  him  out  of  doors,  Mr.  Tag  rag !  " 

"  But — who  could  have  dreamt  it  ?  How  was — really,  Mr. 
Gammon !— how  teas  I  to  know  it?" 

"  That's  the  fact,  however,"  said  Gammon,  shrugging  his 
shoulders.  Tag-rag  wriggled  about  in  his  chair,  put  his 
hands  in  and  out  of  his  pockets,  scratched  his  head,  and  con- 
tinued staring  open-mouthed  at  the  bearer  of  such  astounding 
intelligence.  "  Perhaps,  however,  all  this  is  meant  as  a  joke, 
sir,"— said  he—"  And  if  so— it's— it's — a  very " 

"  It's  one  of  his  solicitors  who  were,  fortunate  enough  t<? 


jog  TEN  THOUSAND  A-YEAE. 

make  the  discovery,  that  tells  you.  I  repeat  what  I  have  al« 
ready  told  you,  Mr.  Tag-rag,  that  an  estate  of  ten  thousand 
a-year  is  the  very  least " 

"  Why.  that's  two  hundred  thousand  pounds,  sir !  "—ex- 
claimed  Tag-rag,  with  an  awe-struck  air. 

"  At  the  very  least ' 

"  Lord,  Mr.  Gammon !— Excuse  me,  sir,  but  how  did  you 
find  it  out?" 

"  Mere  accident— a  mere  accidental  discovery,  sir,  in  the 
course  of  other  professional  inquiries ! ' 

"And  does  Mr.  Titmouse  know  it? " 

"  Ever  since  the  day  after  that  on  which  I  called  on  him 
here !  "  replied  Gammon  pointedly. 

"  You  don't  say  so !  "—exclaimed  Tag-rag,  and  then  con- 
tinued silent  for  nearly  half  a  minute,  evidently  amazed  be- 
yond all  power  of  expression. 

"  Well,"— at  length  he  observed—"  I  will  say  this— he's  the 
most  amiable  young  gentleman — the  very  amiaUest  young 
gentleman  I — ever— came  near.  I  always  thought  there  was 
something  uncommon  superior-like  in  his  looks." 

"  Yes— I  think  he  is  of  rather  an  amiable  turn,"  observed 
Gammon,  with  an  expressive  smile — "  and  so  intelligent — 

"  Intelligent!  Mr.  Gammon  !  you  should  only  have  known 
him  as  I  have  known  him ! — Well,  to  be  sure  I — Lord !  His 
only  fault  was,  that  he  was  above  his  business ;  but  when  one 
comes  to  think  of  it,  how  could  it  be  otherwise  ?  From  the 
time  I  first  clapped  eyes  on  him — I— I— knew  he  was — a 
superior  article — quite  superior — you  know  what  I  mean,  sir  ? 
— He  couldn't  help  it,  of  course !— to  be  sure — he  never  was 
much  liked  by  the  other  young  men ;  but  that  was  iealousy ! 
— all  jealousy ;  I  saw  that  all  the  while."  Here  he  looked  at 
the  door,  and  added  in  a  very  low  tone,  "  Many  sleepless 
nights  has  their  bad  treatment  of  Mr.  Titmouse  cost  me  ! — 
Even  I,  now  and  then,  used  to  look  and  speak  sharply  to  him 
—lust  to  keep  him,  as  it  were,  down  to  the  mark  of  the  others 
—he  was  so  uncommon  hand  some  and  genteel  in  his  manner, 
sir.  Hang  me,  if  I  didn't  tell  Mrs.  Tag-rag  the  very  first  day 
he  came  to  me,  that  he  was  a  gentleman  born— or  ought  to 
have  been  one." 

Now,  do  you  suppose,  acute  reader,  that  Mr.  Tag-rag  was 
insincere  in  all  this  ?  By  no  means.  He  spoke  the  real  dic- 
tates of  his  heart,  unaware  of  the  sudden  change  which  had 
taken  place  in  his  feelings.  It  certainly  has  an  ugly  look  of 
improbability— but  it  was  the  nature  of  the  beast;  his  eye  sud. 
denly  caught  a  glimpse  of  the  golden  calf,  and  he  instinc- 
tively fell  down  and  worshipped  it.  "  Well— at  all  events," 
said  Mr.  Gammon,  scarcely  able  to  keep  a  serious  expression 
on  his  face—"  though  he's  not  lived  much  like  a  gentleman 
hitherto,  yet  he  will  live  for  the  future  like  a  very  great  gen 
tleman— and  spend  his  money  like  one,  too." 

"I— J— dare  say— he  will!— I   wonder  how   he    will  gef 


TEN  THOUSAND  A-YEAB.  127 

through  a  quarter  of  it ! — what  do  you  think  he'll  do,  sir  ?  " 

"  Heaven  only  knows— he  may  very  shortly  do  just  what 
he  likes  !  Go  into  the  House  of  Commons,  or " 

"Lord  sir  ! — I  feel  as  if  I  shouldn't  be  quite  right  again 
for  the  rest  of  the  day !— I  own  to  you,  sir,  that  all  yesterday 
and  to-day  I've  been  on  the  point  of  going  to  Mr.  Titmouse's 

lodgings  to  apologize   for— for Good  gracious   me  !  one 

can  t  take  it  all  in  at  once — Ten  thousand  a-year ! — Many  a 
lord  hasn't  got  more— some  not  as  much,  I'll  be  bound  ! — 
Dear  me,  what  will  he  do ! — Well,  one  thing  I'm  sure  of— he'll 
never  have  a  truer  friend  than  plain  Thomas  Tag-rag,  though 
I've  not  always  been  a-flattering  him — I  respected  him  too 
much !— The  many  little  things  I've  borne  with  in  Titmouse, 
that  in  any  one  else  I'd  have— But  why  didn't  he  tell  me. 
sir  ?  We  should  have  understood  one  another  in  a  moment. 
— Here  he  paused  abruptly ;  for  his  breath  seemed  suddenly 
taken  away,  as  he  reviewed  the  series  of  indignities  which 
he  had  latterly  inflicted  on  Titmouse— the  kind  of  life  which 
that  amiable  young  gentleman  had  led  in  his  establishment. 

Never  had  the  keen  Gammon  enjoyed  anything  more  ex- 
quisitely than  the  scene  which  I  have  been  describing.  To  a 
man  of  his  practical  sagacity  in  the  affairs  of  life,  and  knowl- 
edge of  human  nature,  nothing  could  appear  more  ludicrous- 
ly contemptible  than  the  conduct  of  poor  Tag-rag.  How  dif- 
ferently are  the  minds  of  men  constituted !  How  Gammon  de- 
spised Tag-rag ! 

"  Now,  may  I  take  it  for  granted,  Mr.  Tag-rag,  that  we 
understand  each  other  ?  "  replied  Gammon. 

"  Yes  sir,"  replied  Tag-rag  meekly.  "  But  do  you  think 
Mr.  Titmouse  will  ever  forgive  or  forget  the  little  misunder- 
standing we've  lately  had  ?  If  I  could  but  explain  to  him  how 
I  have  been  acting  a  part  towards  him— all  for  his  good ! " 

"  You  may  have  opportunities  for  doing  so,  if  you  are  really 
so  disposed,  Mr.  Tag-rag ;  For  I  have  something  seriously  to 
propose  to  you.  Circumstances  render  it  desirable  that  for 
some  little  time  this  important  affair  should  be  kept  as  quiet 
as  possible ;  and  it  is  Mr.  Titmouse's  wish  and  ours— as  his 
confidential  professional  advisers — that  for  some  few  months 
he  should  continue  in  your  establishment,  and  apparently  in 
your  service  as  before.1" 

"  In  my  service ! — my  service  ! "  interrupted  Tag-rag,  open 
ing  his  eyes  to  their  utmost.  "  I  sha'n't  know  how  to  be- 
have in  my  own  premises!  Have  a  man  with  ten  thousand 
a-year  behind  my  counter,  sir  ?  I  might  as  well  have  the  Lord 
Mayor !  Sir,  it  can't— it  can't  be.  Now,  if  Mr.  Titmouse 
chose  to  become  a  partner  in  the  house — ay,  there  might  be 
something  in  that — he  needn't  have  any  trouble— be  only  a 
sleeping  partner."  Tag-rag  warmed  with  the  thought. 
"  Really,  sir,  that  wouldn't  be  so  much  amiss— would  it?" 
Gammon  assured  him  that  it  was  out  of  the  question;  and 
gave  him  some  of  the  reasons  for  the  proposal  which  he  (Mr. 


128  TEN  THOUSAND  A-YEAR. 

Gammon)  had  been  making.  While  Gammon  fancied  that 
Tag-rag  was  paying  profound  attention  to  what  he  was  say- 
ing. Tag-rag's  thoughts  had  shot  far  a-head.  He  had  an  only 
child— a  daughter,  about  twenty  years  old— Miss  Tabitha 
Tag-rag  ;  and  the  delightful  possibility  of  her  by-and-by  be- 
coming MRS.  TITMOUSE,  put  her  amiable  parent  into  a  per- 
spiration. Into  the  proposal  just  made  by  Mr  Gammon  he 
fell  with  great  eagerness,  which  he  attempted  to  conceal — 
for  what  innumerable  opportunities  would  it  not  afford  him 
for  bringing  about  the  desire  of  his  heart— for  throwing  the 
lovely  young  couple  into  each  other's  way,— endearing  them 
to  each  other .  Oh,  delightful !  It  really  looked  almost  as  if 
fate  had  determined  that  the  thing  should  come  to  pass  !  If 
Mr.  Titmouse  did  not  dine  with  him,  Mrs.  and  Miss  Tag-rag 
at  Satin  Lodge,  Clapham,on  the  very  next  Sunday,  it  should, 
Tag-rag  resolved,  be  owing  to  no  fault  of  his— Mr.  Gammon 
having  arranged  everything  exactly  as  he  had  desired,  and 
having  again  enjoined  Mr.  Tag-rag  to  absolute  secrecy,  took 
his  departure.  Mr.  Tag-rag,  in  his  excitement,  thrust  out  his 
hand,  and  grasped  that  of  Gammon,  which  was  extended  to- 
wards him  somewhat  coldly  and  reluctantly.  Tag-rag  at- 
tended him  with  extreme  obsequiousness  to  the  door ;  and 
on  his  departure  walked  back  rapidly  to  his  own  room,  and  sat 
down  for  nearly  half  an  hour  in  deep  thought.  Abruptly 
rising,  at  lengtn  he  clapped  his  hat  on  his  head,  and  saying 
that  he  should  soon  be  back,  hurried  out  to  call  upon  his 
future  son-in-law,  full  of  affectionate  anxiety  concerning  his 
health — and  vowing  within  himself,  that  henceforth  it  should 
be  the  study  of  his  life  to  make  his  daughter  and  Titmouse 
happy !  There  could  be  no  doubt  of.  the  reality  of  the  event 
just  communicated  to  him  by  Mr.  Gammon ;  for  he  was  one 
of  a  well-known  firm  of  solicitors ;  he  had  had  an  interview  on 
"  important  business"  with  Titmouse  a  fortnight  ago,  and 
that  could  have  been  nothing  but  the  prodigious  event  iust 
communicated  to  himself.  Such  things  had  happened  to 
others— why  not  to  Tittlebat  Titmouse  ?  In  short,  Tag-rag 
had  no  doubt  on  the  matter. 

He  f 9und  Titmouse  not  at  home  5  so  he  left  a  most  particu- 
larly civil  message,  half  a  dozen  times  repeated,  with  Mrs. 
Squallop  (to  whom  also  he  was  especially  civil),  to  the 
effect  that  he,  Mr.  Tag-rag,  should  be  only  too  happy  to  see 
Mr.  Titmouse  at  No.  375,  Oxford  Street,  when  ever  it  might 
suit  his  convenience :  that  he  had  something  very  particular 
to  say  to  him  about  the  unpleasant  and  unaccountable  occur- 
rence of  yesterday ;  that  he  was  most  deeply  concerned  to 
hear  of  Mr.  Titmouse's  indisposition,  and  anxious  to  learn 
from  himself  that  he  had  recovered,  etc.  etc.  etc. ;— all  which, 
together  with  one  or  two  other  little  matters,  which  Mrs. 
Squallop  could  not  help  putting  together,  satisfied  that 
shrewd  lady  that "  something  was  in  the  wind  about  Mr.  Tit- 
mouse j "  and  made  her  reflect  rather  anxiously  on  one  or  two 


TEN  THOUSAND  A-YEAU.  129 

•nolentf scenes  she  had  had  Avith  him,  and  which  she  was  now 
ready  entirely  to  forget  and  forgive.  Having  thus  done  all 
that  at  present  was  in  his  power  to  forward  the  thing,  the 
anxious  and  excited  Tag-rag  returned  to  his  shop ;  on  enter- 
ing which,  one  Lutestring,  his  principal  young  man  eagerly 
apprised  him  of  a  claim  which  he  had,  as  he  imagined  only 
the  moment  before  established  to  the  thanks  of  Mr.  Tag-rag- 
by  having  "  bundled  off,  neck  and  crop,  that  hodious  Tit- 
mouse," who,  about  five  minutes  before,  had,  it  seemed,  had 
the  "  impudence"  to  present  himself  at  the  shop-door,  and 
walk  in  as  if  nothing  had  happened  !  !  [Titmouse  had  so  pre- 
sented himself,  in  consequence  of  a  call  from  Mr.  Gammon, 
immediately  after  his  interview  with  Tag-rag.] 

"  You— ordered — Mr.  Titmouse — off !  !  exclaimed  Tag-rag, 
starting  back  aghast,  and  stopping  his  voluble  and  officious 
assistant. 

"  Of  course,  sir — after  what  happened  yester " 

"  Who  authorized  you,  Mr.  Lutestring?"  inquired  Tag-rag, 
striving  to  choke  down  the  rage  that  was  rising  within  him. 

"  Why,  sir,  I  really  supposed  that— 

"  You  supposed !  You're  a  meddling,  impertinent,  disgust- 
ing  "  Suddenly  his  face  was  overspread  with  smiles,  as 

three  or  four  elegantly  dressed  customers  entered,  whom  he 
received  with  profuse  obeisances.  But  when  their  backs  were 
turned,  he  directed  a  lightning  look  towards  Lutestring,  and 
retreated  once  more  to  his  room,  to  meditate  on  the  agitat- 
ing events  of  the  last  hour.  The  extraordinary  alteration  in 
Mr.  Tag-rag's  behavior  was  attributed  by  his  shopmen  to  his 
having  been  frightened  out  of  his  wits  by  the  threats  of  Tit 
mouse's  lawyer— for  such  it  was  clear  the  stranger  was ;  and 
more  than  one  of  them  stored  it  up  in  their  minds  as  a  useful 
precedent  against  some  future  occasion. 

Twice  afterwards  during  the  day  did  Tag-rag  call  at  Tit- 
mouse's lodgings — but  in  vain ;  and  on  returning  the  third 
time  felt  not  a  little  disquieted.  He  determined,  however  to 
call  the  first  thing  on  the  ensuing  morning ;  if  h«  should  then 
fail  of  seeing  Mr.  Titmouse,  he  was  resolved  to  go  to  Messrs. 
Quirk,  Gammon,  and  Snap — and  besides,  address  a  very 
affectionate  letter  to  Mr.  Titmouse.  How  totally  changed 
had  become  all  his  feelings  towards  that  gentleman  within 
the  last  few  hours !  The  more  Tag-rag  reflected  on  Titmouse's 
conduct,  the  more  he  saw  in  it  to  approve  of.  How  steady 
and  regular  had  he  been  in  his  habits !  how  civil  and  obliging 
how  patient  of  rebuke  !  how  pleasing  in  his  manners  to  the 
customers!  Surely,  surely,  thought  Tag-rag,  Titmouse 
can't  have  been  four  long  years  in  my  employ  without  getting 
a— sort  of  a— feeling— of  attachment  to  me— he'd  have  left 
long  ago  if  he  hadn't !  It  was  true  there  had  now  and  then 
been  tiffs  between  them ;  but  who  could  agree  always  ? 
Even  Mrs.  Tag-rag  and  he,  when  they  were  courting,  often 
fell  out  with  one  another.  Tag-rag  was  now  ready  to  forget 


130  TEN  THOUSAND  A-YEAlt. 

and  forgive  all— he  had  never  meant  any  harm  to  Titmouse. 
He  believed  that  poor  Tittlebat  was  an  orphan,  poor  soul ! 
alone  in  the  wide  world — now  he  would  become  the  prey  of 
designing  strangers.  Tag-rag  did  not  like  the  appearance 
of  Gammon.  Xo  doubt  that  person  would  try  and  ingratiate 


must  be  to  see  her— his  daughter !  How  could  Tag-rag  make 
Tittlebat's  stay  at  his  premises  (for  he  could  not  bring  him- 
self to  believe  that  on  the  morrow  he  could  not  set  all  right, 
and  disavow  the  impudent  conduct  of  Lutestring)  agreeable 
and  delightful  ?  He  would  discharge  the  first  of  his  young 
men  that  did  not  show  Titmouse  proper  respect.  What  low 
lodgings  poor  Tittlebat  lived  in !  Why  could  he  not  take  up 
his  quarters  at  Satin  Lodge  ?  They  always  had  a  nice  spare 
bed-room.  Ah !  that  would  be  a  stroke !  How  Tabby  could 
endear  herself  to  him !  What  a  number  of  things  Mrs.  Tag- 
rag  could  do  to  make  him  comfortable  ! 

About  seven  o'clock  Tag-rag  quitted  his  premises  in  Ox- 
ford Street,  for  his  country  house ;  and,  occupied  with  these 
and  similar  delightful  and  anxious  thoughts  and  specula- 
tions, hurried  along  Oxford  Street  on  his  way  to  the  Clapham 
Stage,  without  thinking  of  his  umbrella,  though  it  rained 
fast.  When  he  had  taken  his  place  on  the  coach-box,  beside 
old  Crack  (as  he  had  done  almost  every  night  for  years,)  he  was 
so  unusually  silent  that  Crack  naturally  thought  that  his  best 
passenger  was  going  to  become  bankrupt,  or  compound 
with  his  creditors,  9r  something  of  that  sort.  Mr.  Tag-rag 
could  hardly  keep  his  temper  at  the  slow  pace  old  Crack  was 
driving  at— just  when  Tag-rag  could  have  wished  to  gallop 
the  whole  way.  .Never  had  he  descended  with  so  much 
briskness,  as  when  the  coach  at  length  drew  up  before  the 
little  green  gate,  which  opened  on  the  nice  little  gravel  walk, 
which  led  up  to  the  little  green  wooden  porch,  which  shel- 
tered the  slim  door  which  admitted  you  into  Satin  Lodge. 
As  Tag-rag  stood  for  a  moment  wiping  his  wet  shoes  upon 
the  mat,  he  could  not  help  observing,  for  the  first  time,  by 
the  inward  light  of  ten  thousand  a-year,  how  uncommon 
narrow  the  passage  was;  and  thinking  that  Satin  Lodge 
would  never  do,  when  he  should  be  the  father-in-law  of  a 
man  worth  ten  thousand  a-year,  he  could  easily  let  that  house 
and  take  a  larger  one.  As  he  hung  his  hat  upon  the  peg,  the 
mischiev9us  insolence  of  Lutestring  occurred  to  him  ;  and 
he  deposited  such  a  prodigious,  but  half -suppressed  execra- 
tion upon  that  gentleman  s  name,  as  must  have  sunk  a  far 
more  buoyant  sinner  many  fathoms  deeper  than  usual  into 
a  certain  not  and  deep  place  that  shall  be  nameless. 

Mrs.  and  Miss  Tag-rag  were  sitting  in  the  front  parlor,  in- 
tending to  take  tea  as  soon  as  Mr.  Tag-rag  should  have  arriv- 
ed. It  was  not  a  large  room,  but  furnished  prettily,  accord, 


TEN  THOUSAND  A-YEAE;  131 

ing  to  the  taste  of  the  owners.  There  Avas  only  one  window, 
and  it  had  a  flaunting  white  summer  curtain.  The  walls  were 
ornamented  with  three  pictures,  in  slight  gilt  frames,  being 
portraits  of  Mr.,  Mrs.,  and  Miss  Tag-rag ;  and  I  do  not  wish 
to  say  more  of  these  pictures,  than  that  in  each  of  them  the 
dress  was  done  witn  singular  exactness  and  fidelity — the 
faces  seeming  to  have  been  painted  in,  in  order  to  set  off  and 
complete  the  picture  of  the  dress.  The  skinny  little  Miss 
Tag-rag  sat  at  the  worn-out  jingling  pianoforte,  playing — 
oh,  horrid  and  doleful  sound  ! — The  .Battle  of  Prague.  Mrs. 
Tag-rag,  a  fat  showily-dressed  woman  of  about  fifty,  her  cap 
having  a  prodigious  number  of  artificial  flowers  in  it,  sat 
reading  a  profitable  volume,  entitled  Groans  from  the  Bot- 
tomless Pit  to  Aicaken  Sleeping  Sinners"  by  the  REV.  DIS- 
MAL HORROR — a  very  rousing  young  dissenting  preacher 
lately  come  into  that  neighborhood,  and  who  had  almost 
frightened  into  fits  half  the  women  and  children,  and  one  or 
two  old  men,  of  his  congregation  ;  given  out,  amongst  several 
similarly  cheering  intimations,  that  they  must  all  necessarily 
be  damned  unless  they  immediately  set  about  making  them- 
selves as  miserable  as  possible  in  this  world.  Only  the  Sun- 
day before,  he  had  pointed  out,  with  awful  force  and  distinct- 
ness, how  cards  and  novels  were  the  devil's  traps  to  catch 

souls :  and  balls  and  theatres  short  and  easy  cuts  to . 

He  had  proved  to  his  trembling  female  hearers,  in  effect, 
that  there  was  only  one  way  to  heaven — through  his  chapel ; 
that  the  only  safe  mode  of  spending  their  time  on  earth  was 
reading  such  blessed  works  as  that  which  he  had  just  pub- 
lished, and  going  to  prayer-meetings  almost  daily.  But  when 
a  Sunday  or  two  before,  he  preached  a  funeral  sermon,  to 
"  improve  the  death  " — such  being  his  impressive  phrase— of 
a  Miss  Snooks,  (who  had  kept  a  circulating  library  in  the 
neighborhood ;)  and  who  haying  been  to  the  theatre  on  the 
Thursday  night,  was  taken  ill  of  a  bowel  attack  on  the  Fri- 
day, and  was  a  "  lifeless  corpse  when  the  next  Sabbath 
dawned,"— you  might  have  heard  a  beetle  sneeze  within  any 
of  the  walls,  all  over  the  crowded  chapel.  Two-thirds  of  the 
women  present,  struck  with  the  awful  judgment  upon  the 
deceased  Miss  Snooks,  made  solemn  vows  never  again  to 
enter  the  accursed  walls  of  a  theatre  ;  many  determined  no 
longer  to  subscribe  to  the  circulating  library,  ruining  their 
precious  souls  with  light  and  amusing  reading ;  and  almost 
all  resolved  forthwith  to  become  active  members  of  a  sort  of 
religious  tract  society,  which  Mr.  Horror  had  just  established 
in  the  neighborhood,  for  the  purpose  of  giving  the  sick  and 
starving  poor  spiritual  food,  in  the  shape  of  tracts,  (chiefly 
written  by  himself,)  which  might  "  wean  their  affections 
away  from  this  vain  world,"  and  "  fix  them  on  better  things," 
rejoicing,  in  the  meanwhile,  in  the  bitter  pangs  of  destitu- 
tion. All  this  sort  of  thing  Mr.  Horror  possibly  imagined 
to  be  advancing  the  cause  of  real  religion !  In  short,  he  had 


132  TEN  THOUSAND  A-YEAH. 

created  a  sort  of  spiritual  fever  about  the.  place;  which  was 
then  just  at  its  height  in  worthy  Mrs.  Tag-rag. 

"  Well,  Dolly,  how  are  you  to-night  ?  'T  inquired  Tag-rag, 
with  unusual  briskness,  on  entering  the  room. 

"Tolerable,  thank  vou,  Tag,"  replied  Mrs.  Tag-rag 
mournfully,  with  a  sign,  closing  the  cheerful  volume  she 
had  been  perusing— it  having  been  recommended  the  preced- 
ing Sunday  from  the  pulpit  by  its  pious  and  gifted  author, 
Mr.  Horror,  to  be  read  and  prayed  over  every  day  by  every 
member  of  his  congregation. 

"  And  how  are  you,  Tabby  ?  "  said  Tag-rag,  addressing  his 
daughter.  "  Come  and  kiss  me,  you  little  slut — come ! " 

"  No,  I  sha'n't  pa !  Do  let  me  go  on  with  my  practising  " 
— and  twang !  went  those  infernal  keys. 

"  D'ye  hear,  Tab  ?    Come  and  kiss  me  you  little  minx " 

"Keally,  pa,  how  provoking— just  as  I  am  in  the  middle  of 
the  Cries  of  me  wounded/  I  sha'n't— that's  flat." 

The  doting  parent  could  not,  however,  be  denied ;  so  he 
stepped  to  the  piano,  put  his  arm  around  his  dutiful  daugh- 
ter s  neck,  kissed  her  fondly,  and  then  stood  for  a  moment 
behind  her,  admiring  her  brilliant  execution  of  The  Trum- 
pet of  Victory.  Having  changed  his  coat,  and  put  on  an  old 
pair  of  shoes,  Tag-rag  was  comfortable  for  the  evening. 

"  Tabby  plays  wonderful  well,  Dolly,  don't  she  ?  "  said  Tag- 
rag,  as  the  tea  things  were  being  brought  in,  by  way  of  begin- 
ning a  conversation,  while  he  drew  nis  chair  nearer  to  his 
wife. 

"  Ah !  I'd  a  deal  rather  see  her  reading  something  serious 
— for  life  is  short,  Tag,  and  eternity's  long." 

u  Botheration !— Stuff !— Tut ! "  " 

"  You  may  find  it  out  one  day,  my  dear,  when  it's  too 
late— 

"  I'll  tell  you  what,  Dolly,"  said  Tag-rag  angrily,  "  you're 
coming  a  great  deal  too  much  of  that  sort  of  thing — my  house 
is  getting  like  a  Methodist  meeting-house.  I  can't  bear  it, — 
I  can't !  What  the  deuce  is  come  to  you  all  in  these  parts, 
lately  ? "  Mr.  Tag-rag  had  been  induced,  some  three  years 
before,  to  quit  the  Church  of  England  and  take  up  with  Mr. 
Dismal  Horror ;  but  his  zeal  by  no  means  kept  pace  with  that 
of  his  wife. 

"  Ah,  Tag-rag,"  replied  his  wife,  with  a  sigh,  "  1  can  only 
pray  for  you— I  can  do  no  more — 

"  Oh !  "  exclaimed  Tag-rag,  with  an  air  of  desperate  dis- 
gust, thrusting  his  hands  into  his  pockets,  and  stretching  his 
legs  to  their  utmost  extent  under  the  table.  "  I'll  tell  you 
what,  Mrs.  T.,"  he  added,  after  a  while,  "  too  much  of  one 
thing  is  good  for  nothing ;  you  may  choke  a  dog  with  pud- 
ding :— I  sha'n't  renew  my  sitting  at  Mr.  Horror's." 

"  Oh,  dear,  dear  pa,  do !  That's  a  love  of  a  pa  ! "  interposed 
Miss  Tag-rag,  twirling  round  on  her  music-stool.  "  All  Clap- 
ham's  running  after  him— he's  quite  the  rage !  There's  the 


TEN  THOUSAND  A- YEAR.  133 

Dugginses,  the  Pips,  the  Jones,  the  Maggots— and,  really, 
Mr.  Horror  does  preach  such  dreadful  things,  it's  quite  de- 
lightful to  look  round  and  see  all  the  people  with  their  eyes 
and  mouths  wide  open — and  ours  is  such  a  good  pew  for  see- 
ing— and  Mr.  Horror  is  such  a  bee— yeautiful  preacher, — 
isn't  he,  ma?" 

"  Yes,  love,  he  is— but  I  wish  I  could  see  you  profit  by  him, 
and  preparing  for  death " 

"  Why,  ma,  how  can  you  go  on  in  that  ridiculous  way  ? 
You  know  I'm  not  twenty  yet !  " 

"  Well,  well !  poor  Tabby !  "  here  Mrs.  Tag-rag's  voice  fal- 
tered—" a  day  will  come,  when " 

"  Play  me  the  Devil  among  the  Tailors  or  Copenhagen 
Waltz,  something  of  that  sort,  Tabby,"  said  her  father  furi- 
ously, "  or  I  shall  be  sick ! — I  can  t  bear  it !  Curse  Mr. 
Hor " 

"  Well !— Oh,  my !— I  never !— Mr.  Tag-rag !  "  exclaimed  his 
astounded  wife. 

"  Play  away,  Tab,  or  I'll  go  and  sit  in  the  kitchen  !  They're 
cheerful  there  !  The  next  time  I  come  across  Mr.  Horror,  if 
I  don't  give  him  a  bit  of  my  mind—"  here  he  paused,  and 
slapped  his  hand  with  much  energy  upon  the  table.  Mrs. 
Tag-rag  wiped  her  eyes,  sighed,  and  resumed  her  book.  Miss 
Tag-rag  began  to  make  tea,  her  papa  gradually  forgetting 
his  rage,  as  he  fixed  his  dull  gray  eyes  fondly  on  the  pert 
skinny  countenance  of  his  daughter. 

"  By  the  way,  Tag,"  exclaimed  Mrs.  Tag-rag  suddenly,  but 
in  the  same  mournful  tone,  addressing  her  husband,  "  you 
haven't  of  course  forgot  the  flowers  for  my  new  bonnet?  " 

"Never  once  thought  of  it,"  replied  Tag-rag,  doggedly. 

"  You  haven't !  Good  gracious  !  what  am  I  to  go  to  chapel 
in  next  Sunday !  she  exclaimed,  with  sudden  alarm,  closing 
her  book,  "  and  our  seat  in  the  very  front  of  the  gallery  — 
bless  me !  I  shall  have  a  hundred  eyes  on  me !  " 

"  Now  that  you're  coming  down  a  bit,  and  dropped  out  of 
the  clouds,  Dolly,"  said  her  husband,  much  relieved,  "  I'll 
tell  you  a  bit  of  news  that  will,  I  fancy,  rather " 

"  Come  !  what  is  it,  Tag  ?  "  eagerly  inquired  his  wife. 

"  What  should  you  say  of  a  chance  of  a  certain  somebody  " 
(here  he  looked  unutterable  things  at  his  daughter)  "  that 
shall  be  nameless,  becoming  mistress  of  ten  thousand  a- 
year. 

"  Why  "—Mrs.  Tag-rag  changed  color—"  has  anyone  fallen 
in  love  with  Tab?" 

"What  should  you  say,  Mrs.  T.,  of  our  Tab  marrying  a 
man  with  ten  thousand  a-year  ?  There's  for  you !  Isn't  that 
better  than  all  your " 

"  Oh,  Tag,  don't  say  that ;  but  "—here  she  hastily  turned 
down  the  leaf  of  Groans  from  the  Bottomless  Pit,  and  tossed 
that  inestimable  work  upon  the  sofa— "do  tell  me,  lovyl 
what  are  you  talking  about?" 


134  TEN  THOUSAND  A-YEAR. 

"  What  indeed,  Dolly !— I'm  going  to  have  him  here  to  din, 
ner  next  Sunday." 

Miss  Tag-rag  having  been  listening  with  breathless  eager- 
ness  to  this  little  colloquy  between  her  prudent  and  amiable 
parents,  unconscious  of  what  she  was  about,  poured  all  the 
tea  into  the  sugar-basin,  instead  of  her  papa's  tea-cup. 

"Have  who,  dear  Tag?"  inquired  Mrs.  Tag-rag  impa- 
tiently. 

"  Who  ?  why  whom  but  my  Tittlebat  Titmouse ! !  You've 
seen  him,  and  heard  me  speak  of  him  often,  you  know " 

"  What ! — that  odious,  nasty " 

"  Hush,  hush  !  "  involuntarily  exclaimed  Tag-rag,  with  an 
apprehensive  air—"  That's  all  past  and  gone— I  was  always 
a  little  too  hard  on  him.  Well,  at  all  events,  he's  turned  up 
all  of  a  sudden  master  of  ten  thousand  a-year.  He  has,  in- 
deed— may  this  piece  of  toast  choke  me  if  he  hasn't ! " 

Mrs.  Tag-rag  and  her  daughter  sat  in  speechless  wonder. 

"  Where  did  he  see  Tab,  Taggy  ?  "  inquired  at  length  Mrs. 
Tag-rag. 

"  Oh— I— I— why— you  see— I  don't  exactly  think  that  signi- 
fies so  much — He  will  see  her,  you  know,  next  Sunday." 

"So  then  he's  positively  coming?"  inquired  Mrs.  Tag-rag 
with  a  fluttered  air. 

"Y— e— s — I've  no  doubt." — (I'll  discharge  Lutestring  to- 
morrow, thought  Tag-rag  with  a  sharp  inward  spasm.) 

"Bat  aren't  we  counting  our  chickens,  Taggy,  before 
they're  hatched?  If  Titmouse  is  all  of  :.  sudden  become 
such  a  catch,  he'll  be  snapped  up  in  a  minute,  you  know,  of 
course " 

"  Why,  you  see,  Dolly — we're  first  in  the  market,  I'm  sure 
of  that— his  attorney  tells  me  he's  to  be  kept  quite  snug  and 
quiet  under  my  care  for  months,  and  see  no  one " 

"  My  gracious  !  "  exclaimed  Mrs.  Tag-rag,  holding  up  both 
her  hands — "if  that  don't  look  like  a  special  interposition  of 
Providence,  now " 

"  So  I  thought,  Tabby,  while  Mr.  Gammon  was  telling 
me !  "  replied  her  husband. 

'  Ah,  Tag,  there  are  many  of  'em,  if  we  were  only  to  be  on 
the  look-out  for  them ! " 

"I  see  it  all!  It's  designed  by  Providence  to  get  them 
soon  together !  When  once  Mr.  Titmouse  gets  sight  of  Tab- 
by, and  gets  into  her  company— eh!  Tab,  lovy!  you'll  do  the 
rest,  hem ! " 

'  La,  pa !  how  you  go  on !  "  simpered  Miss  Tag-rag. 

"  You  must  do  your  part,  Tab,"  said  her  father— ff we'll  do 
ours.  He'll  bite,  you  may  depend  on  it,  if  you  manage 
well ! ' 

"What  sort  of  a  looking  young  man  is  he,  dear  pa?  "in- 
quired  Miss  Tag-rag  blushing,  and  her  heart  fluttering  very 
last. 

"  Oh,  you  must  have  seen  him,  sweetest — •" 


TEN  THOUSAND  A-YEAK.  135 

"  How  could  I  ever  notice  any  one  of  the  lots  of  young 
men  at  the  shop,  pa?— I  don't  at  all  know  him." 

"  Well — he's  the  handsomest,  most  genteel-looking  young 
fellow  I  ever  came  across ;  he's  long  been  an  ornament  to  my 
establishment,  for  his  good  looks  and  civil  and  obliging  man- 
ners—quite a  treasure !  You  should  have  seen  how  he  took 
with  ladies  of  rank  always  ! " 

"  Dear  me,"  interrupted  Mrs.  Tag-rag,  anxiously  address- 
her  daughter,  "  I  hope,  Tabby,  that  Miss  Nix  will  send  home 
your  lilac-colored  frock  by  next  Sunday !  " 

"  If  she  don't,  ma,  I'll  take  care  she  never  makes  anything 
more  for  me,  that's  poz !  "  replied  Miss  Tag-rag  earnestly. 

"  We'll  call  there  to-morrow,  love,  and  hurry  her  on,"  said 
her  mother;  and  from  that  moment  until  eleven  o'clock, 
when  the  amiable  and  interesting  trio  retired  to  rest,  nothing 
was  talked  of  but  the  charming  Titmouse,  and  the  good  fort- 
une he  so  richly  deserved,  and  how  long  the  courtship  was 
likely  to  last.  Mrs.  Tag-rag,  who  for  the  last  month  or  so, 
had  always  remained  on  her  knees  before  getting  into  bed 
for  at  least  ten  minutes,  on  this  eventful  evening  compressed 
her  prayers,  I  regret  to  say,  into  one  minute  and  a  half's  time, 
(as  for  Tag-rag,  a  hardened  heathen,  for  all  he  had  taken  to 
hearing  Mr.  Horror,  he  always  tumbled  prayerless  into  bed, 
the  moment  he  was  undressed;)  while,  for  once  in  a  way, 
Miss  Tag-rag,  having  taken  only  half  an  hour  to  put  her 
hair  into  papers,  popped  into  bed  directly  she  had  blown  the 
candle  out,  \vithout  saying  any  prayers — or  even  thinking  of 
finishing  the  novel  which  lay  under  her  pilloAy,  and  which 
she  had  got  on  the  sly  from  the  circulating  library  of  the 
late  Miss  Snooks.  For  several  hours  she  lay  in  a  delicious 
reverie,  imagining  herself  become  Mrs.  Tittlebat  Titmouse, 
riding  about  Clapham  in  a  handsome  carriage,  going  to  the 
play  every  night ;  and  what  would  the  three  Miss  Knippses 
say  when  they  heard  of  it— they'd  burst.  And  such  a  hand- 
some man,  too ! 

She  sunk,  at  length,  into  unconsciousness,  amidst  a,  soft 
confusion  of  glistening  white  satin— favors— bridesmaids — 
Mrs.  Tittlebat  Tit— Tit— Tit— Tit— mouse. 

Titmouse,  about  half-past  nine  o'clock,  on  the  ensuing 
morning,  was  sitting  in  his  little  room  in  a  somewhat 
troubled  humor,  musing  on  many  things,  and  little  imagin- 
ing the  intense  interest  he  had  excited  m  the  feelings  of  the 
amiable  occupants  of  Satin  Lodge,  when  a  knock  at  his  door 
started  him  out  of  his  reverie.  Guess  his  amazement  to  see, 
on  opening  it,  Mr.  Tag-rag ! 

"  Your  most  obedient,  sir,"  commenced  that  gentleman,  in 
a  subdued  and  obsequious  manner,  plucking  off  his  hat  the 
instant  he  saw  Titmouse.  "  I  hope  you're  better,  sir ! — Been 
very  uneasy,  sir,  about  you." 

"  JPlease  to  walk  in,  sir,"  replied  Titmouse,  not  a  little 
flustered— "I'm  better,  sir,  thank  you," 


136  TEN  THOUSAND  A-TEAR. 

"  Happy  to  hear  it,  sir  !— But  am  also  come  to  offer  humble 
apologies  for  the  rudeness  of  that  upstart  that  was  so  rude 
to  you  yesterday,  at  my  premises— know  whom  I  mean,  eh  ? 
—Lutestring— I  shall  get  rid  of  him,  I  do  think " 

"Thank  you,  sir But— but— when  I  was  in  your  em- 
ploy— 

"  Was  in  my  employ ! "  interrupted  Tag-rag  with  a  sigh, 
gazing  earnestly  at  him— "It's  no  use  trying  to  hide  it  any 
longer !  I've  all  along  seen  you  was  a  world  too  good  for— in 
fact,  quite  above  your  situation  in  my  poor  shop !  I  may 
have  been  wrong,  Mr.  Titmouse,"  he  continued  diffidently, 
as  he  placed  himself  on  what  seemed  the  only  chair  in  the 
room,  (Titmouse  sitting  on  a  common  wooden  stool)—"  but  I 
did  it  for  the  best— eh  ?— don't  you  understand  me,  Mr.  Tit- 
mouse ?  "  Titmouse  continued  looking  on  the  floor  incredu- 
lously, sheepishly,  and  somewhat  sullenly. 

"  \  ery  much  obliged,  sir — but  must  say  you've  rather  a 
funny  way  of  showing  it,  sir.  Look  at  the  sort  of  life  you've 
led  me  for  this " 

"  Ah  !  knew  you'd  say  so  !  But  I  can  lay  my  hand  on  my 
heart,  Mr.  Titmouse,  and  declare  to  God — I  can,  indeed,  Mr. 
Titmouse —  "  Titmouse  preserved  a  very  embarrassing  si- 
lence.—" See  I'm  out  of  your  good  books — But — won't  you  for- 
get  and  forgive,  Mr.  Titmouse  ?  I  meant  well.  Nay,  I  numbly 
eg  forgiveness  for  everything  you've  not  liked  in  me.  Can 
I  say  more  ?  Come,  Mr.  Titmouse,  you've  a  noble  nature, 
and  I  ask  forgiveness !  "  cried  Tag-rag  softly  and  earnestly  : 
you  would  have  thought  that  his  life  depended  on  his  suc- 
cess in  what  he  was  doing ! 

"  You— you  ought  to  do  it  before  the  whole  shop,  if  you're 
in  earnest,"  replied  Titmouse,  a  little  relenting — "  for  they've 
all  seen  your  goings  on." 

"  Them ! — the  brutes  !— the  vulgar  fellows,  eugh ! — you  and 
I,  Mr.  Titmouse,  are  a  leetle  above  them  !  Dye  think  we 
ought  to  mind  what  servants  say  ?— Only  you  say  the  word, 
and  I  make  a  clean  sweep  of  'email ;  you  shall  have  the  prem- 
ises to  yourself,  Mr.  Titmouse,  within  an  hour  after  any  of 
those  chaps  shows  you  the  least  glimmer  of  disrespect." 

"  Ah !  I  don't  know — you've  used  me  most  uncommon  bad, 
'pon  my  soul !— far  worse  than  they  have — you've  nearly 
broke  my  heart,  sir !  You  have ! " 

"  Well,  my  womankind  at  home  are  right,  after  all !  They 
told  me  all  along  I  was  going  the  wrong  way  to  work,  when 
I  said  how  I  tried  to  keep  your  pride  down,  and  prevent  you 
from  having  your  head  turned  by  knowing  your  good  looks ! 
Over  and  over  again,  my  little  girl  has  said,  with  tears  in 
her  dear  eyes,  '  you'll  break  his  spirit,  dear  papa— if  he  is 
handsome,  wasn't  it  God  that  made  him  so?"  The  little 
frost-work  which  Titmouse  had  thrown  around  his  heart, 
began  to  melt  like  snow  under  sunbeams.  "Ah,  Mr.  Tit- 
mouse, Mr,  Titmouse !  the  women  are  always  right,  and  we're 


TEN  THOUSAND  A-YEAU.  137 

always  wrong,"  continued.  Tag-rag  earnestly,  perceiving  his 
advantage.  "  Upon  my  soul,  I  could  kick  myself  for  my 
stupidity,  and  cruelty  too ! " 

"  Ah,  I  should  think  so !  No  one  knows  what  I  have  suf- 
fered !  And  now  that  I'm — I  suppose  you've  heard  it  all,  sir  ? 
—what's  in  the  wind — and  all  that  ?  " 

"  Yes,  sir— Mr.  Gammon  (that  most  respectable  gentleman) 
and  I  have  had  a  long  talk  yesterday  about  you,  in  which  he 
did  certainly  tell  me  everything — nothing  like  confidence. 
Mr.  Titmouse,  when  gentleman  meets  gentleman,  you  know! 
Oh,  Lord !  the  news  is  really  delightful !  delightful !  " 

"  Isn't  it,  sir  ? "  eagerly  interrupted  Titmouse,  his  eyes 
glistening  with  sudden  rapture. 

"  Ah !  ten  thous — I  must  shake  hands  with  you,  my  dear 
Mr.  Titmouse  ;  "  and  for  the  first  time  in  their  lives  their 
hands  touched,  Tag-rag  squeezing  that  of  Titmouse  with 
energetic  cordiality ;  wnile  he  added,  with  a  little  emotion 
in  his  tone—"  Thomas  Tag-rag  may  be  a  plain-spoken  and 
wrong-headed  man,  Mr.  Titmouse — but  he's  a  warm  heart,  I 


assure  you 


"  And  did  Mr.  Gammon  tell  you  all,  sir  ? "  eagerly  inter- 
rupted Titmouse. 

Everything— everything ;  quite  confidential,  I  assure  you, 
for  he  saw  the  interest  I  felt  in  you !  " 

"  And  did  he  say  about  my — hem !— eh  ?  my  stopping  a  few 
weeks  longer  with  you '? "  inquired  Titmouse,  chagrin  over- 
spreading his  features. 

"  I  think  he  did,  indeed,  Mr.  Titmouse !  He's  quite  bent 
on  it,  sir  !  And  so  would  any  true  friend  of  yours  be — 
because  you  see,"— here  he  dropped  his  voice,  and  looked 
very  mysteriously  at  Titmouse—"  in  short,  I  quite  agree 
with  Mr.  Gammon ! " 

"  Do  you  indeed,  sir !  "  exclaimed  Titmouse,  with  rather 
an  uneasy  look. 

"  I  do,  i'  faith !  Why,  they'd  give  thousands  and  thou- 
sands to  get  you  out  of  the  way — and  what's  money  to  them ! 
But  they  must  look  very  sharp  that  get  at  you  in  the  prem- 
ises of  Thomas  Tag-rag,  I  warrant  'em— Talking  of  that, 
ah,  ha !— it  will  be  a  funny  thing  to  see  YOU,  Mr.  Titmouse 
— Squire  Titmouse — ah,  ha,  ha !  " 

"  You  won't  hardly  expect  me  to  go  out  with  goods^  I  sup- 
pose, sir?'' 

"  Ha,  ha,  ha ! — Ha,  ha,  ha ! — Might  as  well  ask  me  if  I'd 
clean  that  beast  Lutestring's  shoes  !  No,  no,  my  dear  Mr. 
Titmouse,  you  and  I  have  done  with  each  other  as  master 
and  servant ;  it's  only  as  friends  that  we  know  each  other 
now ! — You  may  say  and  do  whatever  you  like,  and  come 
and  go  when  and  where  you  like !— It's  true  it  will  make  my 
other  hands  rather  jealous,  and  get  me  into  trouble  ;  but 
what  do  I  care  ?  Suppose  they  do  all  give  me  warning  for 
your  sake  ?  Let  'em  go,  say  1 ! "  He  snapped  his  fingers 


138  TEN  THOUSAND  A-TEAR. 

with  an  air  of  defiance.  "  Your  looks  and  manners  would 
keep  a  shop  full  of  customers— one  Titmouse  is  worth  a  hun- 
dred of  them," 

"  Ton  my  soul,  you  speak  most  uncommon  gentlemanlike, 
sir,  certainly ! "  said  Titmouse,  with  a  little  excitement— 
"  and  if  you'd  only  always— but  that's  all  past  and  gone ;  and 
I've  no  objections  to  say  at  once,  that  all  the  articles  I  may 
want  in  your  line  I'll  have  at  your  establishment,  pay  cash 
down,  and  ask  for  no  discount.  And  I'll  send  all  my  friends, 
for.  in  course,  sir,  you  know  I  shall  have  lots  of  them  ! " 

"Don't  forget  your  oldest,  your  truest,  your  humblest 
friend,  Mr.  Titmouse,"  said  Tag-rag,  with  a  cringing  air. 

'•  That  I  won't !  "  replied  Titmouse  heatedly. 

[It  flashed  across  his  mind  that  a  true  and  old  friend  would 
be  only  too  happy  to  do  him  some  such  trifling  service  as  to 
lend  him  a  ten-pound  note.] 

" Hem!— Now,  are  you  such  a  friend,  Mr.  Tag-rag  ?"  cried 
he  sheepishly. 

"  Am  I  ? — Can  you  doubt  me  ?  Try  me  !  See  what  I  could 
not  do  for  you !  Friend,  indeed !  "  and  he  looked  quite  fondly 
at  Titmouse. 

"  Well,  I  believe  you,  sir !  And  the  fact  is,  a— a— a— you 
see,  Mr.  Tag-rag,  though  all  this  heap  of  money's  coming  to 
me,  I'm  precious  low  just  now " 

"Ye— e— e— s,  Mr.  Titmouse,"  quoth  Tag-rag  anxiously; 
his  dull  gray  eye  fixed  on  that  of  Titmouse  steadfastly. 

"  Well — if  you've  a  mind  to  prove  your  words,  Mr.  Tag-rag, 
and  don't  mind  advancing  me  a  ten-pound  note — 

"  Hem ! "  involuntarily  uttered  Tag-rag,  so  suddenly  and 
violently,  that  it  made  Titmouse  almost  start  off  his  seat. 
Then  Tag-rag's  face  flushed  over,  he  twirled  about  his  watch- 
key  rapidly,  and  wriggled  about  in  his  chair  with  visible 
agitation. 

"  Oh,  you  aren't  going  to  do  it !  If  so,  you'd  better  say  it  at 
once,"  quoth  Titmouse,  rather  cavalierly. 

"  Why — teas  ever  anything  so  unfortunate  ?  "  stammered 
Tag-rag.  "  That  cursed  lot  of  French  goods  I  bought  only 
yesterday,  to  be  paid  for  this  very  morning— and  it  will  drain 
me  of  every  penny !" 

"  Ah— yes  .'—True !  Well,  it  don't  much  signify,"  said  Tit- 
mouse carelessly,  running  his  hand  through  his  bushy  hair. 
"  In  fact,  I  needn't  have  bothered  an  old  friend  at  all,  now  I 
think  of  it — Mr.  Gammon  says  he's  my  banker  to  any 
amount.  I  beg  pardon,  I'm  sure — 

Tag-rag  was  in  a  horrid  dilemma.  He  felt  so  flustered  by 
the  suddenness  and  seriousness  of  the  thing,  that  he  could 
not  see  his  way  plain  in  any  direction. 

Let  me  see,  at  length  he  stammered;  and  pulling  a 
ready-reckoner  out  of  his  pocket,  he  affected  to  be  consulting 
it,  as  if  to  ascertain  merely  the  state  of  his  banker's  account, 
but  really  desiring  a  few  moments'  time  to  collect  his 


TEN  THOUSAND  A-TEAE.  139 

thoughts.  'Twas  in  vain,  however;  nothing  occurred  to 
him ;  he  saw  no  way  of  escape ;  his  old  friend  the  devil 
deserted  him  for  a  moment — supplying  him  with  no  ready 
lie  to  meet  the  exigency.  He  must,  he  feared,  cash  up! 
"  Well,"  said  he—"  it  certainly  is  rather  unfortunate,  just  at 
this  precise  moment ;  but  I'll  step  to  the  shop,  and  see  how 
my  ready-money  matters  stand.  It  sha'n't  be  a  trifle,  Mr. 
Titmouse,  that  shall  stand  between  us.  But — if  I  should  be 
hard  run — perhaps— eh  ?  Would  a  five-pound  note  do  ?  " 

"  Why— a— a— certainly,  if  it  wouldn  t  suit  you  to  advance 
the  ten — 

"  I  dare  say,"  interrupted  Tag-rag,  a  trifle  relieved,  "  I  shall 
be  able  to  accommodate  you.  Perhaps  you'll  step  on  to  the 
shop  presently,  and  then  we  can  talk  over  matters ! — By  the 
way,  did  you  ever  see  anything  so  odd?  forgot  the  main 
thing ;  come  and  take  your  mutton  with  me  at  Clapham,  next 
Sunday— my  womankind  will  be  quite  delighted.  Nay,  'tis 
their  invitation — ha,  ha!  " 

"  You're  uncommon  polite,"  replied  Titmouse,  coloring 
with  pleasure.  Here  seemed  the  first  pale  primrose  of  the 
coming  spring — an  invitation  to  Satin  Lodge ! 

"  The  politeness— the  favor— will  be  yours,  Mr.  Titmouse ! 
I'm  quite  proud  of  your  coming !  We  shall  be  quite  alone ; 
have  you  all  to  ourselves ;  only  me,  my  wife,  and  daughter — 
an  only  child,  Mr.  Titmouse— such  a  child !  She's  really 

often  said  to  me,  '  I  wonder  '—but, 1  won't  make  you  vain, 

eh !  May  I  call  it  a  fixture  ?  " 


bachelor— I've  got  ladies  in  the  case,  and  all  that— eh,  Mr. 
Titmouse  ?  and  a  young  one ! " 

"  Well,  thank  you,  sir.    Since  your  so  pressing " 

"  That's  it !  An  engagement,  poz ! — Satin  Lodge — for  Sun- 
day next,"  said  Tag-rag,  rising  and  looking  at  his  watch. 
"Time  for  me  to  be  oil.  See  you  soon  at  the  shop?  Soon 
arrange  that  little  matter  of  business,  eh  ?  You  understand  ? 
Good-bye  !  good-bye !  "  and  shaking  Titmouse  cordially  by 
the  hand,  Tag-rag  took  his  departure.  As  he  hurried  on  to 
his  shop,  he  felt  in  a  most  painful  perplexity  about  this  loan 
of  five  pounds.  It  was  truly  like  squeezing  five  drops  of 
blood  out  of  his  heart.  But  what  was  to  be  done  ?  Could 
he  offend  Titmouse  ?  Where  was  he  to  stop,  if  he  once  be- 
gan? Dare  he  ask  for  security  ?  Suppose  the  whole  affair 
should  after  all  turn  into  smoke? 

Now,  consider  the  folly  of  Tag-rag.  Here  was  he  in  all 
this  terrible  pucker  about  advancing  five  pounds  on  the 
strength  of  prospects  and  chances  which  he  had  deemed  safe 
for  adventuring  his  daughter  upon — her,  the  only  object  on 
earth,  (except  money,)  that  he  regarded  with  anything  like 
sincere  affection.  How  was  this  ?  The  splendor  of  the  future 


140  TEN  THOUSAND  A-YEAR. 

possible  good  fortune  of  his  daughter  might,  perhaps,  have 
dazzled  and  confused  his  perceptions.  Then,  again,  that  was 
a  remote  contingent  venture,  but  this  sudden  appeal  to  his 
pocket— the  demand  of  an  immediate  outlay  and  venture — 
was  an  instant  pressure,  and  he  felt  it  severely.  Immediate 
profit  was  everything  to  Tag-rag— 'twas  his  very  life's  blood ! 
He  was,  in  truth,  a  tradesman  to  his  heart's  core.  If  he  could 
have  seen  the  immediate  quid  pro  quo,  or  could,  at  all  events, 
have  got,  if  only  by  way  of  earnest,  as  it  were,  a  bit  of  poor 
Titmouse's  heart,  and  locked  it  up  in  his  desk,  he  would  not 
have  cared  so  much ;  it  would  have  been  a  little  in  his  line ; 
here  was  a  FIVE-POUND  NOTE  going  out  forthwith,  and 
nothing  immediate,  visible,  palpable,  replacing  it.  Oh !  Tit- 
mouse had  unconsciously  pulled  Tag-rag's  very  heart- 
strings ! 

Observe,  discriminating  reader,  that  there  is  all  the  differ- 
ence in  the  world  between  a  TRADESMAN  and  a  MERCHANT  ; 
and,  moreover,  that  it  is  not  every  tradesman  that  is  a  Tag- 
rag. 

All  these  considerations  combined  to  keep  Tag-rag  in  a 
perfect  fever  of  doubt  and  anxiety,  which  several  hearty 
curses,  (I  regret  to  say,)  failed  in  effectually  relieving.  By 
the  time,  however,  that  Titmouse  had  made  his  appearance 
at  Mr.  Tag-rag's  shop,  with  a  sufficiently  sheepish  air,  and 
was  beginning  to  run  the  gauntlet  of  grinning  contempt  from 
the  choice  youths  on  each  side  of  the  shop,  Tag-rag  nad  de- 
termined on  the  course  he  should  pursue  in  the  very  embar- 
rassing matter  above  referred  to.  To  the  amazement  of  all 
present,  he  bolted  out  of  a  little  counting-house  or  side-room, 
hastened  to  meet  Titmouse  with  outstretched  hand  and  cor- 
dial speech,  drew  him  into  his  little  room,  and  shut  the  door. 
There  Tag-rag  informed  his  flurried  young  friend  that  he 
had  made  arrangements  (with  a  little  inconvenience,  which, 
however,  between  friends,  signified  nothing)  for  lending  Tit- 
mouse five  pounds. 

"  And,  as  life's  uncertain,  my  dear  Mr.  Titmouse,"  said 
Tag-rag,  as  Titmouse,  with  ill-disguised  ecstasy,  put  the 
five-pound  note  into  his  pocket — "  even  between  the  dearest 
friends — eh  ?  Understand  ?  It's  not  you  I  fear,  nor  you  me, 
because  we've  confidence  in  each  other.  But  if  anything 
should  happen,  those  we  leave  behind  us  "— — lit  re  he  took 
out  of  his  desk,  an  "I.  O.  U.  £5,"  ready  drawn  up  and  dated 
— "  a  mere  slip — a  word  or  two— is  satisfaction  to  both  of 
us." 

"  Oh  yes,  sir !  yes,  sir  !— any  thing ! "  said  Titmouse  ;  and 
hastily  taking  the  pen  proffered  him,  signed  his  name ;  on 
which  Tag-rag  felt  a  little  relieved.  Lutestring  was  then 
summoned  into  the  room,  and  thus  (not  a  little  to  his  disgust 
and  astonishment)  addressed  by  his  imperious  employer. 
"  Mr.  Lutestring,  you  will  have  the  goodness  to  see  that  Mr. 
Titmouse  is  treated  by  every  person  in  my  establishment 


TEN  THOUSAND  A-YEAH.  141 

with  the  utmost  possible  respect.  Whoever  treats  tMs  gen- 
tleman with  the  slightest  disrespect,  isn't  any  longer  a  ser- 
vant of  mine.  D'ye  hear  me,  Mr.  Lutestring  ?  "  added  Tag- 
rag  sternly,  observing  a  very  significant  glance  of  intense 
hatred  which  Lutestring  directed  towards  Titmouse.  "  D'ye 
hear  me,  sir  ?  " 

"  Oh,  yes,  sir !  yes,  sir !  your  orders  shall  be  attended  to," 
he  replied,  in  as  insolent  a  tone  as  he  could  venture  upon, 
and  leaving  the  room  with  a  half  audible  whistle  of  contempt, 
while  a  grin  overspread  his  features,  he  had  within  five  min- 
utes filled  the  mind  of  every  shopman  in  the  establishment 
with  feelings  of  mingled  wonder,  hatred,  and  fear  towards 
Titmouse.  What,  thought  they,  could  have  happened  ?  What 
was  Mr.  Tag-rag  about?  This  was  all  of  a  piece  with  his  rage 
at  Lutestring  the  day  before.  "  D— n  Titmouse !  "  said  or 
thought  every  one  of  them  ! 

Titmouse,  for  the  remainder  of  the  day,  felt,  as  may  be 
imagined,  but  little  at  his  ease  5  for — to  say  nothing  of  his 
insuperable  repugnance  to  the  discharge  of  any  of  his  former 
duties ;  his  uneasiness  under  the  oppressing  civilities  of  Mr. 
Tag-rag ;  and  the  evident  disgust  towards  him  entertained 
by  his  companions ;  many  most  important  considerations 
arising  out  of  recent  and  coming  events— his  altering  cir- 
cumstances— were  momentarily  forcing  themselves  upon  his 
attention.  The  first  of  these  was  his  hair;  for  Heaven  seemed 
to  have  suddenly  given  him  the  long-coveted  means  of  chang- 
ing its  detested  hue ;  and  the  next  was  an  eyeglass,  without 
which,  he  had  long  felt  his  appearance  and  appointments  to 
be  painfully  incomplete.  Early  in  the  afternoon,  therefore, 
on  the  readily-admitted  plea  of  important  business,  he  ob- 
tained the  permission  of  the  obsequious  Mr.  Tag-rag  to  depart 
for  the  day  and  instantly  directed  his  steps  to  the  well-known 
shop  of  a  fashionable  perfumer  and  per  ruquier,  in  Bond  Street 
— well-known  to  those,  at  least,  who  were  in  the  habit  of 
glancing  at  the  enticing  advertisements  in  the  newspapers. 
Having  watched  through  the  window  till  the  coast  was 
clear,  (for  he  felt  a  natural  delicacy  in  asking  for  a 
hair  dye  before  people  who  could  in  an  instant  perceive 
his  urgent  occasion  for  it,)  he  entered  the  shop,  where 
a  well  dressed  gentleman  was  sitting  behind  the  counter 
reading.  He  was  handsome ;  and  his  elaborately  curled 
hair  was  of  a  heavenly  black  (so  at  least  Titmouse  con- 
sidered it)  that  was  better  than  a  thousand  printed  ad- 
vertisements of  the  celebrated  fluid  which  formed  the 
chief  commodity  there  vended.  Titmouse,  with  a  little 
hesitation,  asked  this  gentleman  what  was  the  price  of  their 
article  "  for  turning  light  hair  black  " — and  was  answered — 
*'  only  seven  and  sixpence  for  the  smaller-sized  bottle."  One 
was  in  a  twinkling  placed  upon  the  counter,  where  it  lay  like 
a  miniature  mummy,  swathed,  as  it  were,  in  manifold  adver- 
tisements. "You'll  find  the  fullest  directions  within,  and 


142  TEN  THOUSAND  A-YEAR. 

testimonials  from  the  highest  nobility  to  the  wonderful  effi* 
cacy  of  the'  CYANOCHAITANTHROPOPOIOX.'  " 

"  Sure  it  will  do,  sir  ?  "  inquired  Titmouse  anxiously. 

"Is  my  hair  dark  enough  to  your  taste,  sir?"  said  the 
gentleman,  with  a  calm  and  bland  manner — "  because  I  owe 
it  entirely  to  this  valuable  specific." 

"  Do  you,  indeed,  sir  ?  "  inquired  Titnwuse :  adding  with  a 
sigh,  "but,  between  ourselves  look  at  mine!" — and,  lifting 
oft  his  hat  for  a  moment,  he  exhibited  a  great  crop  of  bushy, 
carroty  hair. 

"Whew!  rather  ugly  that,  sir ! "—exclaimed  the  gentle- 
man, looking  very  serious — "  What  a  curse  to  be  boru  with 
such  hair,  isn't  it  V  " 

"  'Pon  my  life  I  think  so,  sir ! "  answered  Titmouse  mourn- 
fully ;  "  and  do  you  really  say,  sir,  that  this  what's-its-name 
turned  yours  of  that  beautiful  black  ?  " 

"  Think  ?  'Pon  my  honor,  sir, — certain ;  no  mistake,  I  as- 
sure you !  I  was  fretting  myself  into  my  grave  about  the 
color  of  my  hair !  Why,  sir,  there  was  a  nobleman  in  here  (I 
don't  like  to  mention  names)  the  other  day,  with  a  head  that 
seemed  as  if  it  had  been  dipped  into  water,  and  then  pow- 
dered with  brick  dust ;  but— I  assure  you,  the  Cyanpchaitan- 
thropopoion  was  too  much  for  it— it  turned  black  in  a  very 
short  time.  You  should  have  seen  his  lordship's  ecstasy — 
[the  speaker  saw  that  Titmouse  would  swallow  anything  ; 
so  he  went  on  with  a  confident  air] — and  in  a  month's  time 
he  had  married  a  beautiful  woman  whom  he  had  loved  from 
a  child,  but  who  had  vowed  she  could  never  bring  herself  to 
marry  a  man  with  such  a  head  of  hair." 

"How  long  does  it  take  to  do  all  this,  sir?"  interrupted 
Titmouse  eagerly,  with  a  beating  heart. 

"  Sometimes  two — sometimes  three  days.  In  four  days* 
time,  I'll  answer  for  it,  your  most  intimate  friend  would  not 
know  you.  My  wife  did  not  know  me  for  a  long  while,  and 
wouldn't  let  me  salute  her— ha,  ha  ! "  Here  another  customer 
entered;  and  Titmouse  laying  down  the  five-pound  note  he  had 
squeezed  out  of  Tag-rag,  put  the  wonder-working  phial  into 
his  pocket,  and  on  receiving  his  change,  departed,  bursting 
with  eagerness  to  try  the  effects  of  the  Cyanochaitanthropo- 
poion.  Within  half  an  hour's  time  he  might  have  been  seen 
driving  a  hard  bargain  with  a  pawnbroker,  for  a  massive-look- 
ing eye-glass,  which,  as  it  hung  suspended  in  the  window,  he 
had  for  months  cast  a  longing  eye  upon;  and  he  eventually  pur- 

*  This  fearful  looking  word,  I  wish  to  inform  my  lady  readers,  is  an 
original  and  monstrous  amalgamation  of  three  or  four  Greek  words — 
K.va.voxcuTavOpiJTroiroiwv  —  denoting  a  fluid  "  that  can  render  the  human 
hair  black."  Whenever  a  barber  or  perfumer  determines  on  trying  to 
puff  off  some  villainous  imposition  of  this  sort,  strange  to  say,  he  goes 
to  some  starving  scholar,  and  gives  him  half-a-crownlo  coin  a  word  like 
the  above,  that  shall  be  equally  unintelligible  and  unpronounceable,  and 
therefore  attractive  and  popular. 


TEN  THOUSAND  A-YEA&.  143 

chased  it  (his  eyesight,  I  need  hardly  say,  was  perfect)  for  only 
fifteen  shillings.  After  taking  a  hearty  dinner  in  a  little  dusky 
eating-house  in  Rupert  Street,  frequented  by  fashionable 
looking  foreigners,  with  splendid  heads  of  curling  hair  and 
mustaches,  he  hastened  home,  eager  to  commence  the  grand 
experiment.  Fortunately,  he  was  undisturbed  that  evening. 
Having  lit  his  candle,  and  locked  his  door,  with  tremulous 
fingers  he  opened  the  papers  enveloping  the  little  phial ;  and 
glancing  over  their  contents,  got  so  inflamed  with  the  num- 
berless instances  of  its  efficacy,  detailed  in  brief  but  glowing 
terms— as— the  "  Duke  of  *****  * — the  Countess  of  *  *  * 

*  °  *— the  Earl  of,  etc.  etc.  etc.  etc.— the  lovely  Miss ,the 

celebrated  Sir  Little  Bull's-eye,  (who  was  so  gratified  that  he 
allowed  his  name  to  be  used) — all  of  whom,  from  having  hair 
of  the  reddest  possible  description,  were  now  possessed  of 
raven-hued  locks  "—that  he  threw  down  the  paper,  and  hur- 
riedly got  the  cork  out  of  the  bottle.  Having  turned  up  his 
coat  cuffs,  he  commenced  the  application  of  the  Cyanocnait- 
anthropopoion,  rubbing  it  into  his  hair,  eyebrows,  and 
whiskers,  with  all  the  energy  he  was  capable  of ,  for  upwards 
of  half-an-hour.  Then  he  read  over  again  every  syllable  on 
the  papers  in  which  the  phial  had  been  wrapped ;  and  about 
eleven  o'clock,  having  given  sundry  curious  glances  at  the 
glass,  got  into  bed  full  of  exciting  hopes  and  delightful 
anxieties  concerning  the  success  of  the  great  experiment  he 
was  trying.  He  could  not  sleep  for  several  hours.  He 
dreamed  a  rapturous  dream— that  he  bowed  to  a  gentleman 
with  coal-black  hair,  whom  he  fancied  he  had  seen  before — 
and  suddenly  discovered  that  he  was  only  looking  at  himself 
in  a  glass ! ! — This  woke  him.  Up  he  jumped— sprung  to  his 
little  glass  breathlessly— but  ah  !  merciful  Heavens  !  he  al- 
most dropped  down  dead !  His  hair  was  perfectly  green — 
there  could  be  no  mistake  about  it.  He  stood  there  staring 
in  the  glass  in  speechless  horror,  his  eyes  and  mouth  dis- 
tended to  their  utmost  for  several  minutes.  Then  he  threw 
himself  on  the  bed,  and  felt  fainting.  lip  he  presently 
jumped  again  in  a  kind  of  ecstasy— rubbed  his  hair  desper- 
ately and  wildly  about— again  looked  into  the  glass— there  it 
was,  rougher  than  before  ;  but  eyebrows,  whiskers  and  head 
—all  were,  if  anything,  of  a  more  vivid  and  brilliant  green. 
Despair  came  over  him.  What  had  all  his  past  troubles  been 
to  this  ?— what  was  to  become  of  him  ?  He  got  into  bed  again 
and  burst  into  a  perspiration.  Two  or  three  times  he  got  in- 
to and  out  of  bed,  to  look  at  himself  again— on  each  occasion 
deriving  only  more  terrible  confirmation  than  before  of  the 
disaster  that  had  befallen  him.  After  lying  still  for  some 
minutes,  he  got  out  of  bed  and  kneeling  down,  tried  to  say 
his  prayers  :  but  it  was  in  vain — and  he  rose  half  choked.  It 
was  plain  that  he  must  have  his  head  shaved,  and  wear  a 
•wig— that  was  making  an  old  man  of  him  at  once.  Getting 
more  and  more  disturbed  in  his  mind,  he  dressed  himself, 


I44  TEN  THOUSAND  A-YEA1L 

half  determined  on  starting  off  to  Bond  Street,  and  breaking 
every  pane  of  glass  in  the  shop  window  of  the  cruel  impostor 
who  had  sold  him  the  liquid  that  had  so  frightfully  disfigur- 
ed him.  As  he  stood  thus  irresolute,  he  heard  the  step  of 
Mrs.  Squallop  approaching  his  door,  and  recollected  that  he 
had  ordered  her  to  bring  up  his  tea-kettle  about  that  time. 
Having  no  time  to  take  his  clothes  off,  he  thought  the  best 
thing  he  could  do  would  be  to  pop  into  bed  again,  draw  his 
nightcap  down  to  his  ears  and  eyebrows,  pretend  to  be  asleep, 
and,  turning  his  back  towards  the  door,  have  a  chance  of  es- 
caping the  observation  of  his  landlady.  No  sooner  thought 
of  than  done.  Into  bed  he  jumped,  and  drew  the  clothes  over 
him— not  aware,  however,  that  in  his  hurry  he  had  left  his 
legs,  with  boots  and  trousers  exposed  to  view— an  unusual 
spectacle  to  his  landlady,  who  had,  in  fact,  scarcely  ever 
known  him  in  bed  at  so  late  an  hour  before.  He  lay  as  still 
as  a  mouse.  Mrs.  Squallop,  after  glancing  with  surprise  at 
his  legs,  happening  to  direct  her  eyes  towards  the  window, 
beheld  a  small  phial,  only  half  of  whose  dark  contents  were 
remaining— oh  gracious ! — of  course  it  must  be  POISOX,  and 
Mr.  Titmouse  must  be  dead  !— In  a  sudden  fright  she  dropped 
the  kettle,  plucked  the  clothes  off  the  trembling  Titmouse, 
and  cried  out—'1  Oh,  Mr.  Titmouse !  Mr.  Titmouse !  what 

have  you  been " 

"  Well,  ma'am,  what  the  devil  do  you  mean?    How  dare 
-"  commenced  Titmouse,  suddenly  sitting  up,  and  looking 


JUOG,    Q  LIU.VJ.C  JJ.AJ     QJ.ULil.Lf,    IA1J,  O/liVA    A<Jwn.J.Ai^ 

furiously  at  Mrs.  Squallop.  An  inconceivably  strange  and 
horrid  figure  he  looked.  He  had  all  his  day  clothes  on ;  a 
white  cotton  nightcap  was  drawn  down  to  his  very  eyes,  like 
a  man  going  to  be  hanged ;  his  face  was  very  pale,  and  his 
whiskers  were  of  a  bright  green  color. 

"  Lard  a-mighty  ! "  exclaimed  Mrs.  Squallop  faintly,  the 
moment  that  this  strange  apparition  presented  itself ;  and, 
sinking  on  the  chair,  she  pointed  with  a  dismayed  air  to  the 
ominous-looking  object  standing  on  the  window  shelf.  Tit- 
mouse from  that  supposed  she  had  found  out  the  true  state 
of  the  case. 

"  Well — isn't  it  an  infernal  shame,  Mrs.  Squallop  ?  "  said 
he  getting  off  the  bed,  and,  plucking  off  his  night-cap,  exhibit- 
ed the  full  extent  of  his  misfortune.  "  What  d'ye  think  of 
that !  "  he  exclaimed,  staring  wildly  at  her.  Mrs.  Squallop 
gave  a  faint  shriek,  turned  ner  head  aside,  and  motioned 
him  away. 

"  I  shall  go  mad— I  SHALL  ! "  cried  Titmouse,  tearing  his 
green  hair. 

"  Oh  Lord  !— oh  Lord  !  "  groaned  Mrs.  Squallop,  evidently 
expecting  him  to  leap  upon  her.  Presently,  however,  she  a 
little  recovered  her  presence  of  mind  ;  and  Titmouse,  stutter- 
ing with  fury,  explained  to  her  what  had  taken  place.  As  he 
went  on,  Mrs.  Squallop  became  less  and  less  able  to  control 
herself,  and  at  length  burst  into  a  fit  of  convulsive  laughter, 


TEN  THOUSAND  A-TEAE.  145 

and  sat  holding  her  hands  to  her  fat  shaking  sides,  as  if  she 
would  have  tumbled  off  her  chair.  Titmouse  was  almost  on. 
the  point  of  striking  her  !  At  length,  however,  the  fit  went 
off ;  and,  wiping  her  eyes,  she  expressed  the  greatest  com- 
miseration for  him,  and  proposed  to  go  down  and  fetch  up 
some  soft  soap  and  flannel,  and  try  what  "  a  good  hearty 
wash  would  do."  Scarce  sooner  said  than  done— but,  alas, 
in  vain.  Scrub,  scrub — lather,  lather,  did  they  both  ;  but,  the 
instant  the  soap-suds  were  washed  off,  there  was  the  head  as 
green  as  ever ! 

"  Oh  murder,  murder !  what  am  I  to  do,  Mrs.  Squallop?" 
groaned  Titmouse,  having  taken  another  look  at  himself  in 
the  glass. 

"  Why— really  I'd  be  off  to  a  police-office,  and  have  'em  all 
taken  up,  if  as  how  I  was  you  !  "  quoth  Mrs.  Squallop. 

"  No— See  if  I  don't  take  that  bottle,  and  make  the  fellow 
that  sold  it  me  swallow  what's  left — and  I'll  smash  in  his 
shop  front  besides !  " 

"  Oh  you  won't — you  mustn't — not  on  no  account !  Stop  at 
home  a  bit,  and  be  quiet,  it  may  go  off  with  all  this  washing, 
in  the  course  of  the  day.  Soft  soap  is  an  uncommon  strong 
thing  for  getting  colors  out — but — a— a — excuse  me,  Mr.  Tit- 
mouse— why  wasn't  you  satisfied  with  the  hair  God  Almighty 
had  given  you  ?  D  ye  think  He  didn't  know  a  deal  better 
than  you  what  was  best  for  you?  I'm  blest  if  I  don't  think 
this  is  a  judgment  on  you." 

"  What's  the  use  of  your  standing  preaching  to  me  in  this 
way,  Mrs.  Squallop?"  said  Titmouse,  first  with  amazement, 
and  then  with  fury  in  his  manner — "  A'n't  I  half  mad  with- 
out it  ?  Judgment  or  no  judgment— where' s  the  harm  of  my 
wanting  black  hair  any  more  than  black  trousers?  That 
a'n't  your  own  hair,  Mrs.  Squallop — you're  as  gray  as  a 
badger  underneath — 'pon  my  soul!  I've  often  remarked 
it." 

"  I'll  tell  you  what,  Mr.  himperance ! "  furiously  exclaimed 
Mrs.  Squallop,  "you  re  a  liar !  And  you  deserve  what  you've 
got !  It  is  a  judgment,  and  I  hope  it  will  stick  by  you — so 
take  that  for  sauce,  you  vulgar  fellow ! "  (snapping  her  fingers 
at  him.)  "  Get  rid  of  your  green  hair  if  you  can !  It's  only 
carrot  tops  instead  of  carrot  roots— and  some  likes  one,  some 
the  other— ha !  ha !  ha!  " 

"  I'll  tell  you  what,  Mrs.  Squ —  "  he  commenced,  but  she 
had  gone,  having  slammed  to  the  door  behind  her  with  all 
her  force  ;  and  Titmouse  was  left  alone  in  a  half  frantic 
state,  in  which  he  continued  for  nearly  two  hours.  Once 
again  he  read  over  the  atrocious  puffs  which  had  overnight 
inflated  him  to  such  a  degree,  and  he  now  saw  that  they 
were  all  lies.  This  is  a  sample  of  them  :— 

"  This  divine  fluid  (as  it  was  enthusiastically  styled  to  the 
inventor,  by  the  lovely  Duchess  of  Doodle)  possesses  the  in- 
estimable and  astonishing  quality  of  changing  hair,  of  what- 


146  TEN  THOUSAND  A-TEAE. 

ever  color,  to  a  dazzling  jet  black  ;  at  the  same  time  impart- 
ing  to  it  a  rich  glossy  appearance,  which  wonderfully  contri- 
butes to  the  imposing  tout  ensemble  presented  by  those  who 
use  it.  That  well-known  ornament  of  the  circle  of  fashion, 
the  young  and  lovely  Mrs.  Fitzfrippery,  owned  to  the  pro- 
prietor that  to  this  surprising  fluid  it  was  that  she  was 
indebted  for  those  unrivalled  raven  ringlets  which  attracted 
the  eyes  of  envying  and  admiring  crowds,"  and  so  forth.  A 
little  further  on :— "  This  exquisite  effect  is  not  in  all  cases 
produced  instantaneously ;  much  will  of  course  depend  (as 
the  celebrated  M.  Dupuytren,  of  the  Hotel  Dieu,  at  Paris, 
informed  the  inventor)  on  the  physical  idiosyncrasy  of  the 
party  using  it,  with  reference  to  the  constituent  particles  of 
the  coloring  matter  constituting  the  fluid  in  the  capillary 
vessels.  Often  a  single  application  suffices  to  change  the 
most  hopeless-looking  head  of  red  hair  to  as  deep  a  black ; 
but  not  unfrequently  the  hair  passes  through  intermediate 
shades  and  tints — all,  however,  ultimately  settling  into  a 
deep  and  permanent  black." 

This  passage  not  a  little  revived  the  drooping  spirits  of 
Titmouse.  Accidentally,  however,  an  asterisk  at  the  last 
word  in  the  above  sentence,  directed  his  eye  to  a  note  at  the 
bottom  of  the  page,  printed  in  such  minute  type  as  baffled 
any  but  the  strongest  sight  and  most  determined  eye  to  read, 
and  which  said  note  was  the  following : — 

"  Though  cases  do,  undoubtedly,  occasionally  occur,  in 
which  the  native  inherent  indestructible  qualities  of  the  hair 
defy  all  attempts  at  change  or  even  modification,  and  resist 
even  this  potent  remedy :  of  which,  however,  in  all  his  ex- 
perience "  (the  wonderful  specific  has  been  invented  for 
about  six  months)  "  the  inventor  has  known  but  very  few 
instances."  But  to  this  exceedingly  select  class  of  un- 
fortunate incurables,  poor  Titmouse,  alas !  entertained  a 
dismal  suspicion  that  he  belonged ! 

"  Look,  sir !  Look !  Only  look  here  what  your  cussed  stuff 
has  done  to  my  hair !  "  said  Titmouse,  on  presenting  himself 
soon  after  to  the  gentleman  who  had  sold  him  the  infernal 
liquid ;  and,  taking  off  his  hat,  exposed  his  green  hair.  The 
gentleman,  however,  did  not  appear  at  all  surprised,  or  dis- 
composed. 

"  Ah— yes !  I  see— T  see.  You're  in  the  intermediate 
stage.  It  differs  in  different  people ' 

"  Differs,  sir !  I'm  going  mad !  I  look  like  a  green  monkey- 
Cuss  me  if  1  don't ! " 

"  In  me,  now,  the  color  was  a  strong  yellow.  But,  have 
you  read  the  explanations  that  are  given  in  the  wrapper?" 

"  Read  'em  ?  "  echoed  Titmouse  furiously—"  I  should  think 
so!  Much  good  they  do  me!  Sir,  you're  a  humbug! — an 
impostor!  I'm  a  sight  to  be  seen  for  the  rest  of  my  life! 
Look  at  me,  sir !  Eyebrows,  whiskers,  and  all ! ' ; 

"  Rather  a  singular  appearance,  just  at  present,  I  must 


TEN  THOUSAND  A-TEAE.  147 

own,"  said  the  gentleman,  his  face  turning  suddenly  red  all 
over  with  the  violent  effort  he  was  making  to  prevent  an 
explosion  of  laughter.  He  soon,  however,  recovered  himself, 
and  added  coolly—"  If  you'll  only  persevere — 

"  Persevere  be  d d ! "  interrupted  Titmouse,  violently 

clapping  his  hat  on  his  head,  "  I'll  teach  you  to  persevere  in 
taking  in  the  public !  I'll  have  a  warrant  out  against  you  in 
no  time!  " 

"  Oh,  my  dear  sir,  I'm  accustomed  to  all  this  ! "  said  the 
gentleman  coolly. 

"  The— devil— you— are ! "  gasped  Titmouse,  quite  aghast. 

"Oh,  often — often,  while  the  liquid  is  performing  the  first 
stage  of  the  change ;  but,  in  a  day  or  two  afterwards,  the 
parties  generally  come  back  smiling  into  my  shop,  with 
heads  as  black  as  crows  ! " 

"No!  But  really— do  they,  sir?"  interrupted  Titmouse, 
drawing  a  long  breath. 

"  Hundreds,  I  may  say  thousands,  my  dear  sir !  "  And  one 
lady  gave  me  a  picture  of  herself,  in  her  black  hair,  to  make 
up  for  her  abuse  of  me  when  it  was  a  puce  color— Fact, 
honor ! " 

"  But  do  you  recollect  anyone's  hair  turning  green,  and 
then  getting  black?"  inquired  Titmouse  with  trembling 
anxiety. 

"  Recollect  any  ?  Fifty,  at  least.  For  instance,  there  was 
Lord  Albert  Addlehead — but  why  should  I  name  names?  I 
know  hundreds !  But  everything  is  honor  and  confidential 
here!" 

"  And  did  Lord  what's-his-name's  hair  go  green,  and  then 
black  -}  and  was  it  at  first  as  light  as  mine  ?  " 

"  His  hair  was  redder,  and  in  consequence  it  became 
greener,  and  now  is  blacker  than  ever  yours  will  be." 

"  Well,  if  I  and  my  landlady  have  this  morning  used  an 
ounce,  we've  used  a  quarter  of  a  pound  of  soft  soap  in — 

"  Soft  soap !— soft  soap ! "  cried  out  the  gentleman  with  an 
air  of  sudden  alarm — "  That  explains  all,"  (he  forget  how 
well  it  had  already  been  explained  by  him.)  "  By  Heavens, 
sir !— soft  soap !  You  may  have  ruined  your  hair  forever !  '* 
Titmouse  opened  his  eyes  and  mouth  with  a  start  of  terror, 
it  not  occurring  to  his  reflecting  mind  that  the  intolerable 
green  had  preceded  and  caused,  not  followed,  the  use  of  the 
soft  soap.  "  Go  home,  my  dear  sir !  God  bless  you — go 
home,  as  you  value  your  'hair;  take  this  small  bottle  of 
DAMASCUS  CREAM,  and  rub  it  in  before  it's  too  late ;  and  then 
use  the  remainder  of  the — 

"  Then  you  don't  think  it's  already  too  late?"  inquired 
Titmouse  faintly :  and  having  been  assured  to  the  contrary — 
having  asked  the  price  of  the  Damascus  cream,  which  was 
"  only  three-and-sixpence,"  (stamp  included) — he  paid  it 
with  a  rueful  air,  and  took  his  departure.  He  sneaked  along 
the  streets  with  the  air  of  a  pick-pocket,  fearful  that  everyone 


148  TEN  THOUSAND  A-YEAR. 

he  met  was  an  officer  who  had  his  eye  on  him.  He  was  not, 
in  fact,  very  far  off  the  mark ;  for  many  a  person  smiled,  and 
stared,  and  turned  round  to  look  at  him  as  he  went  along. 


CHAPTER  VI. 

i 

TITMOUSE  slunk  up-stairs  to  his  room  in  a  sad  state  of  de- 
pression, and  spent  the  next  hour  in  rubbing  into  his  hair  the 
Damascus  cream.  He  rubbed  till  he  could  hardly  hold  his 
arms  up  any  longer,  from  sheer  fatigue.  Having  risen  at 
length  to  mark,  from  the  glass,  the  progress  he  had  made,  he 
found  that  the  only  result  of  his  persevering  exertions  had 
been  to  give  a  greasy  shining  appearance  to  the  hair,  that 
remained  as  green  as  ever.  With  a  half-uttered  groan  he 
sunk  down  upon  a  chair,  and  fell  into  a  sort  of  abstraction, 
which  was  interrupted  by  a  sharp  knock  at  his  door.  Tit- 
mouse started  up,  trembled,  and  stood  for  a  moment  or  two 
irresolute,  glancing  fearfully  at  the  glass ;  and  then,  opening 
the  door,  let  in  Mr.  Gammon,  who  started  back  a  pace  or 
two,  as  if  he  had  been  shot,  on  catching  sight  of  the  strange 
figure  of  Titmouse.  It  was  useless  for  Gammon  to  try  to 
check  his  laughter;  so,  leaning  against  the  door-post,  he 
yielded  to  the  impulse,  and  laughed  without  intermission  for 
at  least  two  minutes.  Titmouse  felt  desperately  angry,  but 
feared  to  show  it ;  and  the  timid,  rueful,  lackadaisical  air 
with  which  he  regarded  the  dreaded  Mr.  Gammon,  only 
prolonged  and  aggravated  the  agonies  of  that  gentleman. 
When  at  length  he  had  a  little  recovered  himself,  holding 
his  left  hand  to  his  side,  with  an  exhausted  air,  he  entered 
the  little  apartment,  and  asked  Titmouse  what  in  the  name 
of  heaven  he  had  been  doing  to  himself :  "  Without  this"  (in 
the  absurd  slang  of  the  lawyers)  that  he  suspected  most 
vehemently  all  the  while  quite  well  what  Titmouse  had  been 
about ;  but  he  wished  to  hear  Titmouse's  own  account  of  the 
matter !— Titmouse,  not  daring  to  hesitate,  complied— Gam- 
mon listening  in  an  agony  of  suppressed  laughter.  He  look- 
ed as  little  at  Titmouse  as  he  could,  and  was  growing  a  trifle 
more  sedate,  when  Titmouse,  in  a  truly  lamentable  tone, 
inquired,  "  What's  the  good,  Mr.  Gammon,  of  ten  thousand 
a-year  with  such  a  horrid  head  of  hair  as  this  ?  "  On  hearing 
which  Gammon  jumped  off  his  chair,  started  to  the  window, 
and  laughed  for  one  or  two  minutes  without  ceasing.  This 
was  too  much  for  Titmouse,  who  presently  cried  aloud  in  a 
lamentable  manner;  and  Gammon,  suddenly  ceasing  his 
laughter,  turned  round  and  apologized  in  the  most  earnest 
manner ;  after  which  he  uttered  an  abundance  of  sympathy 
for  the  sufferings  which  "he  deplored  being  unable  to  al- 
leviate." He  even  restrained  himself  when  Titmouse  again 
again  asked  if  he  could  not  "  have  the  law  "  of  the  man 


TEN  THOUSAND  A-YEAR.  149 

who  had  so  imposed  on  him.  Gammon  diverted  the  thoughts 
of  his  suffering  client,  by  taking  from  his  pocket  some  very 
imposing1  packages  of  paper,  tied  round  with  red  tape.  From 
time  to  time,  however,  he  almost  split  his  nose  with  efforts  to 
restrain  his  laughter,  on  catching  a  fresh  glimpse  of  poor 
Titmouse's  emerald  hair.  Mr.  Gammon  was  a  man  of  busi- 
ness, however;  and  in  the  midst  of  all  this  distracting 
excitement,  contrived  to  get  Titmouse's  signature  to  sundry 
papers  of  no  little  consequence  ;  amongst  others,  first,  to 
a  bond  conditioned  for  the  payment  of  £500 ;  secondly, 
another  for  £10,000 ;  and  lastly,  an  agreement  (of  which  he 
gave  Titmouse  an  alleged  copy)  by  which  Titmouse,  in 
Titmouse,  in  consideration  of  Messrs.  Quirk,  Gammon, 
and  Snap  using  their  best  exertions  to  put  him  in  possession 
of  the  estate,  etc.,  etc.,  bound  himself  to  conform  to  their 
wishes  in  everything,  on  pain  of  their  instantly  throwing  up 
the  whole  affair,  looking  out  for  another  heir-at-law  ( ! )  and 
issuing  execution  forthwith  against  Titmouse  for  all  ex- 
penses incurred  under  his  retainer.  I  said  that  Gammon 
gave  his  confiding  client  an  alleged  copy  of  this  agreement ; — 
it  was  not  a  real  copy,  for  certain  stipulations  appeared  in 
each  that  were  not  intended  to  appear  in  the  other,  for 
reasons  which  were  perfectly  satisfactory  to  Messrs.  Quirk, 
Gammon,  and  Snap.  When  Gammon  had  got  to  this  point, 
he  thought  it  the  fitting  opportunity  for  producing  a  second 
five-pound  note.  He  did  so,  and  put  Titmouse  thereby  into 
an  ecstasy,  which  pushed  out  of  his  head  for  a  while  all  rec- 
ollection of  what  had  happened  to  his  hair.  He  had  at  that 
moment  nearly  eleven  pounds  in  hard  cash !  Gammon  easily 
obtained  from  him  an  account  of  his  little  money  transac- 
tions with  Huckaback— of  which,  however,  all  he  could  tell 
was — that  for  ten  shillings  down,  he  had  given  a  written  en- 
gagement to  pay  fifty  pounds  on  getting  the  estate.  Of 
this  Gammon  made  a  careful  memorandum,  explaining  the 
atrocious  villainy  of  Huckaback— and,  in  short,  that  if  he 
(Titmouse)  did  not  look  very  sharply  about  him,  he  would  be 
robbed  right  and  left ;  so  that  it  was  of  the  utmost  conse- 
quence to  him  early  to  learn  how  to  distinguish  between  false 
and  true  friends.  Gammon  went  on  to  assure  him  that  the 
i  instrument  he  had  given  to  Huckaback  was  probably,  in 
point  of  law,  not  worth  a  farthing,  on  the  ground  of  its  being 
both  fraudulent  and  usurious ;  and  intimated  something, 
which  Titmouse  did  not  very  distinctly  comprehend,  about 
the  efficacy  of  a  bill  m  equity  for  a  discovery  ;  which,  at  a 
very  insignificant  expense,  (not  exceeding  £100,)  would  enable 
the  plaintiff  in  equity  to  put  the  defendant  in  equity,  (i.  e. 
Huckaback,)  in  the  way  of  declaring,  on  his  solemn  oath, 
that_  he  had  advanced  the  full  sum  of  £50 ;  and  having 
obtained  this  important  a*nd  satisfactory  result,  Titmouse 
would  have  the  opportunity  of  disproving  the  statement  of 
Huckaback— if  he  could;  which  of  course  he  could  not.  By 


150  TEN  THOUSAND  A-YEAB. 

this  process,  however,  a  little  profitable  employment  would 
have  oeen  afforded  to  a  certain  distinguished  firm  in  Saffron 
Hill— and  that  was  something — to  Gammon. 

"  But.  by  the  way,  talking  of  money,"  said  Titmouse  sud- 
denly, "you  can't  think  how  surprising  handsome  Mr.  Tag-rag 
has  behaved  to  me ! " 

"Indeed,  my  dear  sir!"  exclaimed  Gammon,  with  real 
curiosity,  "  what  has  he  done?  " 

"  Advanced  me  five  pounds— all  of  his  own  head !  " 

"  Are  you  serious,  Mr.  Titmouse  ?  "  inquired  Gammon. 

Titmouse  produced  the  change  which  he  had  obtained  for 
Tag-rag's  five-pound  note,  minus  only  the  prices  of  the 
Oyanochaitanthropopoion,  the  Damascus  cream,  and  the  eye- 
glass, Gammon  merely  stroked  his  chin  in  a  thoughtful 
manner.  So  occupied,  indeed,  was  he  with  his  reflections, 
that  though  his  eye  was  fixed  on  the  ludicrous  figure  of 
Titmouse,  which  so  shortly  before  had  occasioned  him  such 
paroxysms  of  laughter,  he  did  not  feel  the  least  inclination 
even  to  a  smile.  Tag-rag  advance  Titmouse  five  pounds! 
Throwing  as  much  smiling  indifference  into  his  manner  as 
was  possible,  he  asked  Titmouse  the  particulars  of  so  strange 
a  transaction.  Titmouse  answered  (how  truly  the  reader 
can  judge)  that  Mr.  Tag-rag  had,  in  the  very  handsomest 
way,  volunteered  the  loan  of  five  pounds ;  and  moreover 
offered  him  any  further  sum  he  might  require  ! 

"  What  a  charming  change,  Mr.  Titmouse !  "  exclaimed 
Gammon,  with  a  watchful  eye  and  anxious  smile. 

"  Most  delightful,  'pon  my  soul !  " 

"  Rather  sudden,  too !— eh  ?— Mr.  Titmouse  ?  " 

"  Why— no— no ;  I  should  say,  'pon  my  life,  certainly  not. 
The  fact  is,  we've  long  misunderstood  each  other.  He  s  had 
an  uncommon  good  opinion  of  me  all  the  while — people  have 
tried  to  set  him  against  me ;  but  it's  no  use,  he's  found  them 
out— he  told  me  so !  And  he's  not  only  said,  but  done  the 
handsome  thing !  He's  turned  up,  by  Jove,  a  trump  all  of  a 
sudden— though  it  long  looked  an  ugly  card." 

"  Ha,  ha,  ha ! — very  ! — how  curious  !  "  exclaimed  Mr.  Gam- 
mon, mechanically  revolving  several  important  matters  in 
his  mind. 

"I'm  going,  too,  to  dine  at  Satin  Lodge,  Mr.  Tag-rag's 
country  house,  next  Sunday." 

"  Indeed !  It  will  be  quite  a  change  for  you,  Mr.  Titmouse ! " 

"Yes,  it  will,  by  Jove;  and— a — a — what's  more— there's 
— hem ! — you  understand  ?  " 

"  Go  on,  I  beg,  my  dear  Mr.  Titmouse " 

"  There's  a  lady  in  the  case— not  that  she's  said  anything ; 
but  a  nod's  as  good  as  a  wink  to  a  blind  horse— eh  ?  Mr.  Gam- 
mon?" 

"I  should  think  so— Miss  Tag-rag  will  have  money,  of 
course  ? " 

"  You've  hit  it !    Lots !    But  I've  not  made  up  my  mind." 


TEN  THOUSAND  A-YEAH.  151 

[I'd  better  undeceive  this  poor  devil  at  once,  as  to  this 
sordid  wretch  Tag-rag  (thought  Gammon,)  otherwise  the 
cunning  old  rogue  may  get  a  very  mischievous  hold  upon 
him !  And  a  lady  in  the  case !  The  old  scamp  has  a  daugh- 
ter !  Whew !  this  will  never  do  !  The  sooner  I  enlighten 
my  young  friend,  the  better— though  at  a  little  risk.] 

"  It's  very  important  to  be  able  to  tell  who  are  real  and  who 
false  friends,  as  I  was  saying  just  now,  my  dear  Titmouse," 
said  Gammon  seriously. 

"I  think  so.  Now  look,  for  instance,  there's  that  fellow 
Huckaback.  I  should  say  he " 

"Pho!  pho!  my  dear  sir,  a  mere  beetle — he's  not  worth 
thinking  of,  one  way  or  the  other.  But,  can't  you  guess 
another  sham  friend,  who  has  changed  so  suddenly." 

"  Do  you  mean  Mr.  Tag-rag— eh  ? 

"  I  mention  no  names  ;  but  it's  rather  odd,  that  when  I  am 
speaking  of  hollow-hearted  friends,  you  should  at  once  name 
Mr.  Tag-rag." 

"  The  proof  of  the  pudding— handsome  is  that  handsome 
does ;  and  I've  got  £5  of  his  money,  at  any  rate." 

"  Of  course,  he  took  no  security  for  such  a  trifle,  between 
such  close  friends  as  you  and  him  ?  " 

"  Oh — why— no  w  you  mention  it— But  'twas  only  a  line— one 
line." 

u  I  knew  it,  my  dear  sir,"  interrupted  Gammon  calmly, 
with  a  significant  smile—"  Tag-rag  and  Huckaback,  they're 
on  a  par— ah,  ha,  ha !  My  dear  Titmouse,  you  are  too  honest 
and  confiding! " 

"  What  keen  eyes  you  lawyers  have,  to  be  sure !  Well— I 
never  "—he  was  evidently  somewhat  staggered.  "  I— I— must 
say,"  he  presently  added,  looking  gratefully  at  Gammon,  "  I 
think  I  do  now  know  of  a  true  friend,  that  sent  me  two  five- 
pound  notes,  and  never  asked  for  any  security." 

"  My  dear  sir,  you  really  pain  me  by  alluding  to  such  a 
matter ! " 

[Oh,  Gammon,  is  not  this  too  bad !  What  are  the  papers 
which  you  know  are  now  in  your  pocket,  signed  only  this 
very  evening  by  Titmouse  ?] 

"  You  are  not  a  match  for  Tag-rag,  Titmouse ;  because  he 
was  made  for  a  tradesman— you  are  not.  Do  you  think  he 
would  have  parted  with  his  £5  but  for  value  received  ?  Oh, 
Tag-rag!  Tag-rag!" 

I— I  really  begin  to  think,  Mr.  Gammon— 'pon  my  soul,  I 
do  think  you're  right." 

"  Think !— Why— for  a  man  of  your  acuteness— how  could 
he  imagine  you  could  forget  the  long  course  of  insult  and 
tyranny  which  you  have  endured  under  him ;  that  he  should 
change  all  of  a  sudden— just  now,  when " 

"Ay,  by  Jove!  just  when  I'm  coming  into  my  property," 
interrupted  Titmouse  quickly. 


152  TEN  THOUSAND  A-YEAR. 

"  To  be  sure— to  be  sure !  Just  now,  I  say,  to  make  this 
sudden  change !  Bah  !  bah  ! " 

"  I  hate  Tag-rag,  always  did.  Now,  he's  trying  to  take  me 
in,  just  as  he  does  everybody;  but  I've  found  him  out;  I 
won't  lay  out  a  penny  with  him !  " 

"  Would  you,  do  you  think,  ever  have  seen  the  inside  of 
Satin  Lodge,  if  you  hadn't " 

"  Why,  1  don't  know ;  I  really  think— hem !  " 

•'  Would  you,  my  dear  sir?— But  now  a  scheme  occurs  to 
me — a  very  amusing  idea  indeed!  Ah,  ha,  ha!— Shall  I  tell 
you  a  way  of  proving  to  his  own  face  how  insincere  and  in- 
terested he  is  towards  you  ?  Go  to  dinner,  by  all  means,  eat 
his  good  things,  hear  all  that  the  whole  set  of  them  have  to 
say,  and  just  before  you  go,  (it  will  require  you  to  have  your 
wits  about  you,)  pretend,  with  a  long  face,  that  our  affair  is 
all  a  bottle  of  smoke :  say  that  Messrs.  Quirk,  Gammon,  and 
Snap  have  told  you  the  day  before  that  they  had  made  a 
horrid  mistake,  and  you  were  the  wrong  man ': 

"'Pon  my  lire,  I— I — really,"  stammered  Titmouse,  "  dare- 
n't— I  couldn't— I  couldn't  keep  it  up — he'd  half  kill  me. 
Besides,  there  will  be  Miss  Tag-rag—it  would  be  the  death  of 
her,  I  know." 

Miss  Tag-rag !  Gracious  Heavens  !  What  on  earth  can  you 
have  to  do  with  her  f  You — why,  if  you  really  succeed  in  get- 
ting this  fine  property,  she  might  make  a  very  suitable  wife 
for  one  of  your  grooms— ha,  ha!— But  for  you— absurd ! " 

"  Ah !  I  don't  know— she  may  be  a  devilish  fine  girl,  and 
the  old  fellow  will  have  a  tolerable  penny  to  leave  her — and 
a  bird  in  the  hand— eh  V  Besides,  I  know  what  she's  all  along 
thought— hem !— but  that  doesn't  signify." 

"  Pho !  pho !  Ridiculous !  Ha,  ha,  na !  Fancy  Miss  Tag-rag 
Mrs.  Titmouse!  Your  eldest  son — ah, ha,  ha!  Tag-rag  Tit- 
mouse, Esq.  Delightful !  Your  honored  father  a  draper  in 
Oxford  Street ! "  All  this  might  be  very  clever,  but  it  did  not 
seem  to  tell  upon  Titmouse,  whose  little  heart  had  been 
reached  by  a  cunning  hint  of  Tag-rag's  concerning  his  daugh- 
ter's flattering  estimate  of  Titmouse's  personal  appearance. 
The  reason  why  Gammon  attacked  so  seriously  a  matter 
which  appeared  so  chimerical  and  preposterous,  was  this — 
that,  according  to  his  present  plan,  Titmouse  was  to  remain 
for  some  considerable  while  at  Tag-rag's,  and,  with  his  utter 
weakness  of  character,  might  be  worked  upon  by  Tag-rag 
and  his  daughter,  and  get  inveigled  into  an  engagement 
which  might  be  productive,  hereafter,  of  no  little  embarrass- 
ment. He  succeeded,  however,  at  length,  in  obtaining  Tit- 
mouse's promise  to  adopt  his  suggestion,  and  thereby  dis- 
cover the  true  nature  of  the  feelings  entertained  towards  bin? 
at  Satin  Lodge.  He  shook  Titmouse  energetically  by  the 
hand,  and  left  him  perfectly  certain,  that  if  there  was  one 
person  in  the  world  worthy  of  his  esteem,  and  even  reverence, 
that  person  was  OILY  GAMMON,  Esq. 


TEN  THOUSAND  A-TEAE.  153 

As  he  bent  his  steps  towards  Saffron  Hill,  he  reflected 
rather  anxiously  9n  several  matters  that  had  occurred  to  him 
during  the  interview  which  I  have  just  described.  On  reach- 
ing the  office,  he  was  presently  closeted  with  Mr.  Quirk,  to 
whom,  first  and  foremost,  he  exhibited  and  delivered  the 
documents  to  which  he  had  obtained  Titmouse's  signature, 
and  which,  the  reader  will  allow  me  to  assure  him,  were  or 
a  somewhat  different  texture  from  a  certain  legal  instrument 
or  security  which  I  laid  before  him  some  little  time  ago. 

"  Now,  Gammoiij"  said  the  old  gentleman,  as  soon  as  he 
had  locked  up  in  his  safe  the  above-mentioned  documents— 
"  Now,  Gammon,  I  think  we  may  be  up  and  at  'em ;  load  our 
guns,  and  blaze  away,"  and  he  rubbed  his  hands. 

"  Perhaps  so,  Mr.  Quirk,"  replied  Gammon ;  "  but  we 
must,  for  no  earthly  consideration,  be  premature  in  our  oper- 
ations !  Let  me,  by  the  way,  tell  you  one  or  two  little  matters 
that  have  just  occurred  to  Titmouse  !  "—Then  he  told  Mr. 
Quirk  of  the  effects  which  had  followed  the  use  of  the  potent 
Cyanochaitanthropopoion,  at  which  old  Quirk  almost  laugh- 
ed himself  into  fits.  When,  however,  Gammon,  with  a  seri- 
ous air,  mentioned  the  name  of  Miss  Tag-rag,  and  his  grave 
suspicions  concerning  her,  Quirk  bounced  up  out  of  his  chair, 
almost  startling  Gammon  out  of  his.  If  he  had  just  been 
told  that  his  banker  had  broke,  he  could  scarce  have  shown 
more  emotion. 

The  fact  was,  that  he,  too,  had  a  DAUGHTER— an  only  child 
— whom  he  had  destined  to  become  Mrs.  Titmouse. 

"A  designing  old  villain!  "  he  exclaimed  at  length,  and 
Gammon  agreed  with  him ;  but,  strange  to  say,  with  all  his 
acuteness,  never  adverted  to  the  real  cause  of  Quirk's  sudden 
and  vehement  exclamation.  When  Gammon  told  him  of 
the  manner  in  which  he  had  opened  Titmouse's  eyes  to  the 
knavery  of  Tag-rag,  and  the  expedient  he  had  suggested  for 
its  demonstrations,  Quirk  could  have  worshipped  Gammon, 
and  could  not  help  rising  and  shaking  him  very  energetical- 
ly by  the  hand,  much  to  his  astonishment.  After  a  long  con- 
sultation, two  things  were  agreed  upon  by  the  partners  ;  to 
look  out  fresh  lodgings  for  Titmouse,  and  remove  him  pres- 
ently altogether  from  the  company  and  influence  of  Tag-rag. 
Some  time  after  they  had  parted,  Quirk  came  with  an  eager 
air  into  Mr.  Gammon's  room,  with  a  most  important  sugges- 
tion ;  viz.  whether  it  would  not  be  impossible  for  them  to 
get  Tag-rag  to  become  a  surety  to  them,  by  and  by,  on  behalf 
of  Titmouse  ?  Gammon  was  delighted  ! — He  heartily  com- 
mended Mr.  Quirk's  sagacity,  and  promised  to  turn  it  about 
in  his  thoughts  very  carefully.  Not  having  been  let  entirely 
into  Quirk's  policy,  (of  which  the  reader  has  however,  just 
had  a  glimpse,)  Mr.  Gammon  did  not  see  the  difficulties 
which  kept  Quirk  awake  almost  all  that  night ;  viz.  how  to 
protect  Titmouse  from  the  machinations  of  Tag-rag  and  his 
daughter,  and  yet  keep  Tag-rag  sufficiently  interested  in, 


154  TEN  THOUSAND  A-YEAE. 

and  intimate  with,  Titmouse,  to  entertain,  by  and  by,  the 
idea  of  becoming  surety  tor  him  to  them,  the  said  Messrs. 
Quirk,  Gammon,  and  Snap;  and— withal— how  to  manage 
Titmouse  all  the  while,  so  as  to  forward  their  objects,  and 
also  that  of  turning  his  attention  towards  Miss  Quirk ;  all 
this  formed  really  rather  a  difficult  problem !— Quirk  looked 
down  on  Tag-rag  with  honest  indignation,  as  a  mean  and 
mercenary  fellow,  with  unprincipled  schemes,  thank  Heaven, 
he  already  saw  through,  and  from  which  he  resolved  to  res- 
cue his  innocent  and  confiding  client,  who  was  made  for  bet- 
ter things—  to  wit,  Miss  Quirk. 

When  Titmouse  rose  the  next  morning,  ( Saturday,)  behold 
—he  found  his  hair  had  become  of  a  variously  shaded  purple 
or  violet  color  !  Astonishment  and  apprehension  by  turns 
possessed  him,  as  he  stared  into  the  glass,  at  this  unlooked- 
for  change  of-  color ;  and  hastily  dressing  himself,  after 
swallowing  a  very  slight  breakfast,  off  he  went  once  more  to 
the  scientific  establishment  in  Bond  Street,  to  which  he  had 
been  indebted  for  his  recent  delightful  experiences.  The 
distinguished  inventor  and  proprietor  of  the  Cyanochaitan- 
thropopoion  was  behind  the  counter  as  usual— calm  and 
confident  as  ever. 

"  Ah !  I  see— as  I  said !  as  I  said ! "  quoth  he,  with  a  sort  of 
glee  -n  his  manner.  "  Isn't  it  ? — coming  round  quicker  than 
usual — Really,  I'm  selling  more  of  the  article  than  I  can  pos- 
sibly make." 

"  Well," — at  length  said  Titmouse,  as  soon  as  he  had  re- 
covered from  the  surprise  occasioned  by  the  sudden  volubil- 
ity with  which  he  had  been  assailed  on  entering — "  then  is 
it  really  going  on  tolerable  well  ? "  taking  off  his  hat,  and 


Could- 
,that 

purple  is  the  middle  color  between  green  and  black.  Indeed, 
black's  only  purple  and  green  mixed,  which  explains  the 
whole  thing  !  "  Titmouse  listened  with  infinite  satisfaction 
to  this  philosophical  statement. 

"Remember,  sir— my  hair  is  to  come  like  yours — eh?  you 
recollect,  sir  ?  Honor — that  was  the  bargain,  you  know!" 

"  I  have  very  little  doubt  of  it,  sir — nay,  I  am  certain  of  it, 
knowing  it  by  experience." 

[  The  scamp  had  been  hired  expressly  for  the  purpose  of 
lying  thus  in  support  of  the  Cyanochaitanthropopoion ;  his 
own  hair  being  a  natural  black.] 

"  I'm  going  to  a  grand  dinner  to-morrow,  sir,"  said  Tit- 
mouse, with  some  devilish  great  people:  at  the  west  end  of 
the  town— eh  ?  you  understand  ?  will  it  do  by  that  time  ? 
Would  give  a  trifle  to  get  my  hair  a  shade  darker  by  that 
time — for— hem ! — most  lovely  girl — eh  ?  you  understand  the 
thing?— devilish  anxious,  and  all  that  sort  of  thing,  you 
know ! ' 


TEN  THOUSAND  A-TEAE.  155 

"  Yes  —I  do,"  replied  the  gentleman  of  the  shop,  in  a  con- 
fidential tone;  and  opening  one  of  the  glass  doors  behind 
him,  took  out  a  bottle  considerably  larger  than  the  first,  and 
handed  it  to  Titmouse.  "  This,"  said  he,  "  will  complete  the 
thing ;  it  combines  chemically  with  the  purple  particles,  and 
the  result  is — generally  arrived  at  in  about  two  days' 

time "  "But  it  will  do  something  in  a  night's  time — 

eh  ?— surely." 

"  I  should  think  so !  But  here  it  is— it  is  called  the  TETA- 

EAGMENON  ABRACADABRA." 

"  What  a  name ! "  exclaimed  Titmouse  with  a  kind  of  awe. 
"  '  Pon  honor,  it  almost  takes  one's  breath  away " 

"  It  will  do  more,  sir  ;  it  will  take  your  red  hair  away !  By 
the  way,  only  the  day  before  yesterday,  a  lady  of  high  rank, 
(between  ourselves,  Lady  Caroline  Carrot,)  whose  red  hair 
always  seemed  as  if  it  would  have  set  her  bonnet  in  a  blaze 
—ha,  ha !— came  here,  after  two  days  use  of  the  Cyanochaitan- 
thropopoion,  and  one  day's  use  of  this  Tetaragmenon  Abraca- 
dabra—and asked  me  if  I  knew  her.  Upon  my  soul  I  did 
not,  till  she  solemnly  assured  me  she  was  really  Lady  Caro- 
line!" 

"  How  much  is  it  ?  "  eagerly  inquired  Titmouse,  thrusting 
his  hand  into  his  pocket,  with  no  little  excitement. 

"  Only  nine-and-sixpence." 

"  Oh,  my  stars,  what  a  price !  Xine-and-six 

"  Ah,  but  would  you  have  believed  it,  sir  ?  This  extraor- 
dinary fluid  cost  a  great  German  chemist  his  whole  life  to 
bring  to  perfection  ;  and  it  contains  expensive  materials 
from  all  the  four  corners  of  the  world ! " 

"  That  may  be— but  really— I've  laid  out  a  large  figure  with 
you,  sir,  this  day  or  two !  Couldn't  you  say  eight  sli " 

"  We  never  abate,  sir;  it's  not  our  'style  of  doing  business,'* 
replied  the  gentleman,  in  a  manner  that  quite  overawed  poor 
Titmouse,  who  at  once  bought  this,  the  third  abomination  ; 
not  a  little  depressed,  however,  at  the  heavy  prices  he  had 
paid  for  the  three  bottles,  and  the  uncertainty  he  felt  as  to 
the  ultimate  issue.  That  night  he  was  so  well  satisfied  with 
the  progress  which  the  hair  on  his  head  was  making,  (for,  by 
candle-light,  it  really  looked  much  darker  than  could  have 
been  expected,)  that  he  resolved — at  all  events  for  the  present 
—to  leave  well  alone  ;  or  at  the  utmost,  to  try  the  effects  of 
the  Tetaragmenon  Abracadabra  only  upon  his  eyebrows  and 
whiskers.  Into  them  he  rubbed  the  new  specific ;  which,  on 
the  bottle  being  opened,  surprised  him  in  two  respects  :  first, 
it  was  perfectly  colorless ;  secondly,  it  had  a  most  infernal 
smeil.  However,  it  was  no  use  hesitating :  he  had  bought 
and  paid  for  it;  and  the  papers  it  was  folded  in  gave  an  ac- 
count of  its  success  that  was  really  irresistible  and  unques- 
tionable. Away,  therefore,  he  rubbed;  and  when  he  had 
finished,  got  into  bed,  in  humble  hope  as  to  the  result  which 
would  be  disclosed  by  the  morning's  light.  But,  alas !  would. 


156  TEN  THOUSAND  A-YEAE. 

you  have  believed  it  ?  When  he  looked  at  himself  in  the  glass, 

about  six  o'clock,  (at  which  hour  he  awoke,)  I  protest  it  is  a 

fact,  that  his  eyebrows  and  whiskers  were  as  white  as  snow ; 

which,  combining  with  the  purple  color  of  the  hair  on  his 

head,  rendered  him  one  of  the  most  astounding  objects  (in 

human  shape)  the  eye  of  man  had  ever  beheld.    There  was 

the  wisdom  of  age  seated  in  his  eyebrows  and  whiskers,  un- 

jspeakable  youthful  folly  in  his  features,  and  a  purple  crown 

1  of  WONDER  on  his  head. 

Really,  it  seemed  as  if  the  devil  were  wreaking  his  spite 
on  Mr.  Titmouse  \  nay,  perhaps  it  was  the  devil  himself  who 
had  served  him  with  the  bottles  in  Bond  Street.  Or  was  it  a 
mere  ordinary  servant  of  the  devil — some  greedy,  impudent, 
unprincipled  speculator,  who,  desirous  of  acting  on  the  ap- 
proved maxim — Fiat  experimentum  in  corpore  vili — had 
pitched  on  Titmouse  (seeing  the  sort  of  person  he  was)  as 
a  godsend,  quite  reckless  what  effect  he  produced  on  his  hair, 
so  as  the  stuff  was  paid  for,  and  its  effects  noted  ?  It  might 
possibly  have  been  sport  to  the  gentleman  of  the  shop,  but 
it  was  near  proving  death  to  poor  Titmouse,  who  really 
might  have  resolved  on  throwing  himself  out  of  the  window, 
only  that  he  saw  it  was  not  big  enough  for  a  baby  to  get 
through.  He  turned  aghast  at  the  monstrous  object  which 
his  little  glass  presented  to  him ;  and  sunk  down  upon  the 
bed  with  a  feeling  as  if  he  were  now  fit  for  death.  As  before, 
Mrs.  Squallop  made  her  appearance  with  his  kettle  for  break- 
fast. He  was  sitting  at  the  table  dressed,  and  with  his  arms 
folded,  with  a  reckless  air,  not  at  all  caring  to  conceal  the 
new  and  still  more  frightful  change  which  he  had  undergone 
since  she  saw  him  last.  Mrs.  Squallop  started  at  him  for  a 
second  or  two  in  silence :  then,  stepping  back  out  of  the 
room,  suddenly  drew  to  the  door  and  stood  outside,  laughing 
vehemently. 

"  I'll  kick  you  down-stairs ! "  shouted  Titmouse,  rushing 
to  the  door,  pale  with  fury,  and  pulling  it  open. 

"  Mr.— Mr.— Titmouse,  you'll  be  the  death  of  me— you  will 
—you  will ! "  gasped  Mrs.  Squallop,  almost  black  in  the  face, 
and  the  water  running  out  of  the  kettle,  which  she  was  un- 
consciously holding  in  a  slant.  After  a  while,  however,  they 
got  reconciled.  Mrs.  Squallop,  had  fancied  he  had  been  but 
rubbing  chalk  on  his  eyebrows  and  whiskers ;  and  seemed 
dismayed,  indeed,  on  hearing  the  true  state  of  the  case.  He 
implored  her  to  send  out  for  a  small  bottle  of  ink ;  but  as  it 
was  Sunday  morning  none  could  be  got ;  and  she  teased  him 
to  try  a  little  blacking !  He  did— but,  of  course,  it  was  use- 
less. He  sat  for  an  hour  or  two  in  an  ecstasy  of  grief  and 
rage.  What  would  he  now  have  given  never  tohave  meddled 
with  the  hair  which  Heaven  had  thought  fit  to  send  him  in, 
to  the  world  with  ?  Alas,  with  what  mournful  force  Mrs. 
Squallop's  words  again  and  again  recurred  to  him !  To  say 
that  he  ate  breakfast  would  be  scarcely  correct.  He.  drank 


TEN  THOUSAND  A-YEAK.  157 

a  single  cup  of  cocoa,  and  ate  about  three  inches'  length  and 
thickness  of  a  roll,  and  then  put  away  his  breakfast  things 
on  the  window  shelf.  If  he  had  been  in  the  humor  to  go  to 
church,  how  could  he  ?  He  would  have  been  turned  out  as  an 
object  involuntarily  inciting-  everybody  to  laughter ! 

Yet,  poor  soul,  in  this  extremity  of  misery,  he  was  not  ut- 
terly neglected ;  for  he  had  that  morning  quite  a  little  levee. 
First  came  Mr.  Snap,  who,  having  quite  as  keen  and  clear  an 
eye  for  his  own  interest  as  his  senior  partners,  had  early  seen 
how  capable  was  acquaintance  with  Titmouse  of  being  turned 
to  his  (Snap's)  great  advantage.  He  had  come,  therefore, 
dressed  very  stylishly,  to  do  a  little  bit  of  toadying  on  the 
sly  (on  his  own  exclusive  account ; )  and  had  brought  with 
him,  for  the  edification  of  Titmouse,  a  copy  of  that  day's 
/Sunday  Flash,  which  contained  a  long  account  of  a  bloody 
fight  between  Birmingham  Bigbones  and  London  Littlego, 
for  £500  a  side  (sixty  rounds  had  been  fought,  both  men 
killed,  and  their  seconds  had  bolted  to  Boulogne).  Poor 
Snap,  however,  though  he  had  come  with  the  best  intentions, 
and  the  most  anxious  wish  to  evince  profound  respect  for  the 
future  master  of  ten  thousand-a-year,  was  quite  taken  by 
storm  by  the  very  first  glimpse  he  got  of  Titmouse,  and 
could  not  for  a  long  while  recover  himself.  He  had  come  to 
ask  Titmouse  to  dine  with  him  at  a  tavern  in  the  Strand, 
where  there  was  to  be  capital  singing  in  the  evening  ;  and 
also  to  accompany  him,  on  the  ensuing  morning,  to  the  Old 
Bailey,  to  hear  a  most  interesting  trial "  for  bigamy,  in 
which  Snap  was  concerned  for  the  prisoner— a  miscreant, 
who  had  been  married  to  five  living  women.  Snap  conceived 
(and  very  justly)  that  it  would  give  Titmouse  a  striking 
idea  of  his  (Snap's)  importance,  to  see  him  so  much,  and 
apparently  so  familiarly  concerned  with  well-known  counsel. 
In  his  own  terse  and  quaint  way,  he  was  explaining  to  Tit- 
niouse  the  various  remedies  he  had  against  the  Bond  Street 
impostor,  both  by  indictment  and  action  on  the  case ;  nay, 
(getting  a  little,  however,  beyond  his  depth.)  he  assured  the 
eager  Titmouse,  that  a  bill  of  discovery  would  lie  in  equity, 
to  ascertain  what  the  Tetaragmenon  Abracadabra  was  com- 
posed of,  with  a  view  to  his  preferring  an  indictment  against 
his  owner,  when  his  learned  display  was  interrupted  by  a 
double  knock,  and — oh,  mercy  on  us ! — enter  Mr.  Gammon. 
Whether  he  or  Snap  felt  more  disconcerted,  I  cannot  say ;  but 
Snap  looked  the  most  confused  and  sneaking.  Each  told  the 
other  a  lie,  in  as  easy,  good-natured  a  way  as  he  could  assume, 
concerning  the  object  of  his  visit  to  Titmouse.  Thus  they 
were  going  on,  when — another  knock— and,  "  Is  this  Mr.  Tit- 
mouse's? "  inquired  a  voice,  which  brought  a  little  color  into 
the  face  of  both  Gammon  and  Snap ;  for  it  was  absolutely^old 
Quirk,  who  bustled  breathless  into  the  room,  on  his  first  visit, 
and  seemed  completely  confounded  by  the  sight  of  both  his 
partners.  What  with  this,  and  the  amazing  appearance  pre- 


158  TEN  THOUSAND  A-TEAB. 

sented  by  Titmouse,  Mr.  Quirk  was  so  overwhelmed  that  he 
scarce  spoke  a  syllable.  Each  of  the  three  partners  felt  (in 
his  own  way)  exquisite  embarrassment.  Huckaback,  some 
time  after\yards,  made  his  appearance,  but  him  Titmouse 
unceremoniously  dismissed  in  a  twinkling,  in  spite  of  a  vehe- 
ment remonstrance.  But  presently,  behold  another  arrival 
—Mr.  Tag-rag,  who  had  come  to  announce  that  his  carriage, 
(i.  e.  a  queer,  rickety,  little  one-horse  chaise,  with  a  tallow- 
faced  boy  in  it,  in  faded  livery,)  was  waiting  to  convey  Mr. 
Titmouse  to  Satin  Lodge,  and  take  him  a  long  drive  in  the 
country !  Each  of  these  tour  worthies  could  have  spit  in  the 
other's  face  :  first,  for  detecting,  and,  secondly,  for  rivalling 
him  in  his  schemes  upon  Titmouse.  A  few  minutes  after  the 
arrival  of  Tag-rag,  Gammon,  half-choked  with  disgust,  and 
despising  himself  even  more  than  his  fellow-visitors,  slunk 
off,  followed  almost  immediately  by  Quirk,  who  was  dying 
to  consult  him  on  this!  new  aspect  of  affairs  which  had  pre- 
sented itself.  Snap  (who,  ever  since  the  arrival  of  Messrs. 
Quirk  and  Gammon,  had  felt  like  an  ape  on  hot  irons)  very 
shortly  followed  in  the  footsteps  of  his  partners,  having  made 
no  engagement  whatever  with  Titmouse :  and  thus  the  en- 
terprising and  determined  Tag-rag  was  left  master  of  the 
field.  He  had  in  fact  come  to  do  business,  and  business  he 
determined  to  do.  As  for  Gammon,  during  the  short  time 
he  had  stayed,  how  he  had  endeared  himself  to  Titmouse,  by 
explaining,  not  aware  that  Titmouse  had  confessed  all  to 
Snap,  the  singular  change  in  the  color  of  his  hair  to  have 
been  occasioned  simply  by  the  intense  mental  anxiety 
through  which  he  had  lately  passed!  The  anecdotes  he 
told  of  sufferers,  whose  hair  a  single  night's  agony  had 
changed  to  all  the  colors  of  the  rainbow !  Though  Tag-rag 
out-stayed  all  his  fellow-visitors,  in  the  manner  which  has 
been  described,  he  could  not  prevail  upon  Titmouse  to  ac- 
company him  in  his  "  carriage,  for  Titmouse  pleaded  a  press- 
ing engagement,  (i.  e.  a  desperate  attempt  he  purposed  making 
to  obtain  some  ink,}  but  pledged  himself  to  make  his  appear- 
ance at  Satin  Lodge  at  the  appointed  hour,  (half-past  three 
for  four  o'clock.)  Away,  therefore,  drove  Tag-rag,  delighted 
that  Satin  Lodge  would  so  soon  contain  so  resplendent  a 
visitor— indignant  at  the  cringing,  sycophantic  attentions  of 
Messrs.  Quirk,  Gammon,  and  Snap,  against  whom  he  resolv- 
ed to  put  Titmouse  on  his  guard,  and  infinitely  astonished  at 
the  extraordinary  change  that  had  taken  place  in  the  color 
of  Titmouse's  hair.  Partly  influenced  by  the  explanation 
which  Gammon  had  given  of  the  phenomenon,  Tag-rag  re- 
signed himself  to  feelings  of  simple  wonder.  Titmouse  was 
doubtless  passing  through  stages  of  physical  transmogrifica- 
tion, corresponding  with  the  marvellous  change  that  was 
taking  place  in  his  circumstances ;— and  for  all  he  (Tag-rag) 
knew,  other  and  more  extraordinary  changes  were  going  on; 
Titmouse  migkt  be  growing  at  the  rate  of  half  an  incha^day, 


TEN  THOUSAND  A-TEAE.  159 

and  soon  stand  before  him  a  man  more  than  six  feet  high ! 
Considerations  such  as  these  invested  Titmouse  with  in. 
tense  and  overpowering  interest  in  the  estimation  of  Tag- 
rag  ;  how  could  he  make  enough  of  him  at  Satin  Lodge  that 
day  ?  If  ever  that  hardened  sinner  felt  inclined  to  utter  an 
inward  prayer,  it  was  as  he  drove  home— that  Heaven  would 
array  his  daughter  in  angel  hues  to  the  eyes  of  Titmouse ! 

My  friend  Tittlebat  made  his  appearance  at  the  gate  of 
Satin  Lodge,  at  about  a  quarter  to  lour  o'clock.  Good  gra- 
cious, how  he  had  dressed  himself  out !  He  considerably  ex- 
ceeded his  appearance  when  first  presented  to  the  reader. 

Miss  Tag-rag  had  been  before  her  glass  ever  since  the  in- 
stant of  her  return  from  chapel,  up  to  within  ten  minutes' 
time  of  Titmouse's  arrival.  An  hour  and  a  half  at  least  had 
she  bestowed  on  her  hair,  disposing  it  in  little  corkscrew  and 
somewhat  scanty  curls,  that  quite  glistened  in  bear's  grease, 
hanging  on  each  side  of  a  pair  of  lean  and  sallow  cheeks. 
The  color  which  ought  to  have  distributed  itself  over  her 
cheeks,  in  roseate  delicacy,  and  thought  fit  to  collect  itself 
into  the  tip  of  her  sharp  little  nose.  Her  small  gray  eyes 
beamed  with  the  gentle  and  attractive  expression  that  was 
perceptible  in  her  father's,  and  her  projecting  under  lip  re- 
minded everybody  of  that  delicate  feature  in  her  mother. 
She  was  very  short,  and  her  figure  rather  skinny  and  angu- 
lar. She  wore  her  lilac-colored  frock;  her  waist  being 
pinched  into  a  degree  that  made  you  think  of  a  fit  of  the  colic 
when  you  looked  at  her.  A  long  red  sash,  tied  in  a  most 
elaborate  bow,  gave  a  very  brilliant  air  to  her  dress  gener- 
ally. She  had  a  thin  gold  chain  round  her  neck,  and  wore 
long  white  gloves ;  her  left  hand  holding  her  pocket-hand- 
kerchief, which  she  had  suffused  with  bergamotte  that 
scented  the  whole  room.  Mrs.  Tag-rag  had  made  herself 
very  splendid,  in  a  red  silk  gown  and  staring  head-dress ;  in 
fact,  she  seemed  on  fire.  As  for  Mr.  Tag-rag,  whenever  he 
was  dressed  in  his  Sunday  clothes,  he  looked  the  model  of  a 
dissenting  minister ;  in  his  black  coat,  waistcoat,  and  trousers, 
and  primly-tied  white  neckerchief,  with  no  shirt-collar  visible. 
For  a  quarter  of  an  hour  had  this  interesting  trio  been  standing 
at  their  parlor  window,  in  anxious  expectation  of  Titmouse's 
arrival ;  their  only  amusement  being  the  numberless  dusty 
stage-coaches  driving  every  five  minutes  close  past  their 
gate,  (which  was  about  ten  yards  from  their  house,)  at  once 
enlivening  and  ruralizing  the  scene.  Oh,  that  poor  labur- 
num— laden  with  dust,  drooping  with  drought,  and  evidently 
in  the  very  last  stage  of  a  decline— that  was  planted  beside 
the  little  gate !  Tag-rag  spoke  of  cutting  it  down  ;  tut  Mrs. 
and  Miss  Tag-rag  begged  its  life  a  little  longer— and  then 
that  subject  dropped.  How  was  it  that,  though  both  the 
ladies  had  sat  under  a  thundering  discourse  from  Mr.  Dis- 
mal Horror  that  morning— they  had  never  once  since  thought 
or  spoke  of  him  or  his  sermon— never  even  opened  iiis 


160  TEN  THOUSAND  A-YEAE. 


mouse, 

brought  only     

day  in  the  week,  (his  sermons  on  the  Sunday,  his  Groans" 
on  the  week  day.)  At  length  Miss  Tag-rag's  little  heart  flut- 
tered violently,  for  her  papa  told  her  that  Titmouse  was  com- 
ing up  the  road— and  so  ne  was.  Not  dreaming  that  he  could 
be  seen,  he  stood  beside  the  gate  for  a  moment,  under  the 
melancholy  laburnum:  and,  taking  a  dirty-looking  silk 
hankerchief  out  of  his  hat,  slapped  it  vigorously  about  his 
boots,  (from  which  circumstance  it  may  be  inferred  that  he 
had  walked,)  and  replaced  it  in  his  hat.  Then  he  unbuttoned 
his  surtout,  adjusted  it  nicely,  and  disposed  his  chain  and 
eyeglass  just  so  as  to  let  the  tip  only  of  the  latter  be  seen 
peeping  out  of  his  waistcoat ;  twitched  up  his  collars,  pluck- 
ed down  his  wrist-bands,  drew  the  tip  of  a  white  pocket-hand- 
kerchief out  of  the  pocket  in  the  breast  of  his  surtout,  pulled 
a  white  glove  half-way  on  his  left  hand ;  and,  having  thus 
giving  the  finishing  touches  to  his  toilet,  opened  the  gate, 
and— Tittlebat  Titmouse,  Esquire,  the  great  guest  of  the  day, 
for  the  first  time  in  his  life  (swinging  a  little  ebony  cane 
about  with  careless  grace)  entered  the  domain  of  Mr.  Tag-rag. 

The  little  performance  I  have  been  describing,  though 
every  bit  of  it  passing  under  the  eyes  of  Tag-rag,  his  wife,  and 
his  daughter,  had  not  excited  a  smile  ;  their  anxious  feelings 
were  too  deep  to  be  reached  or  stirred  by  light  emotions. 
Miss  Tag-rag  turned  very  pale  and  trembled. 

"  La,  pa !  "  said  she  faintly,  "  how  could  you  say  he'd  got 
white  eyebrows  and  whiskers?  Why— they're  a  beautiful 
black!" 

Tag-rag  was  speechless  :  the  fact  was  so — for  Titmouse  had 
fortunately  succeeded  in  obtaining  a  little  bottle  of  ink, 
which  he  had  applied  with  great  effect.  As  Titmouse  ap- 
proached the  house,  (Tag-rag  hurrying  out  to  open  the  door 
lor  him,)  he  saw  the  two  ladies  standing  at  the  windows. 
Off  went  his  hat,  and  out  dropped  the  silk  handkerchief,  not 
a  little  disconcerting  him  for  the  moment.  Tag-rag,  how- 
ever, soon  occupied  his  attention  at  the  door  with  anxious 
civilities,  shaking  him  by  the  hand,  hanging  up  his  hat  and 
stick,  and  then  introducing  him  to  the  sitting-room.  The 
ladies  received  him  with  the  most  profound  curtsies,  which 
Titmouse  returned  with  a  quick  embarrassed  bow,  and  an 
indistinct—"!  hope  you're  well,  mem?" 

If  they  had  had  presence  of  mind  enough  to  observe  it,  the 
purple  color  of  Titmouse's  hair  must  have  surprised  them 
not  a  little  ;  all  they  could  see,  however,  was— the  angelic 
owner  of  ten  thousand  a-year. 

The  only  person  tolerably  at  his  ease,  and  he  only  tolerably, 
was  Mr.  Tag-rag ;  and  he  asked  his  guest — 

"Wash  your  hands,  Titmouse,  before  dinner?"  Titmouse 
he  had  washed  them  before  he  had  come  out,    [The 


TEN  THOUSAND  A-YEAE.  161 

day  was  hot,  and  he  had  walked  five  miles  at  a  slapping 
pace.]  In  a  few  minutes,  however,  he  felt  a  little  more  as- 
sured ;  for  it  was  impossible  for  him  not  to  perceive  the  aw- 
ful deference  with  which  he  was  treated. 

"  Seen  the  /Sunday  Flash,  mem  ?  "  said  he  modestly,  ad- 
dressing Mrs.  Tag-rag. 

"I — I — that  is — not  to-day^  she  replied,  coloring. 

"  Vastly  amusing,  isn't  it  ?  "  interposed  Tag-rag,  to  prevent 
mischief — for  he  knew  his  wife  would  as  soon  have  taken  a 
cockatrice  into  her  hand. 

"  Ye— e— s,"  replied  Titmouse,  who  had  not  even  glanced 
at  the  copy  which  Snap  had  brought  him.  "  An  uncommon 
good  fight  between  Birmingham  Big — 

Tag-rag  saw  his  wife  getting  redder  and  redder.  "No 
news  stirring  about  Ministers,  is  there?"  said  he,  with  a 
desperate  attempt  at  a  diversion. 

"  Not  that  I  have  heard,"  replied  Titmouse.  Soon  he  got  a 
little  further,  and  said  how  cheerful  the  stages  going  past 
must  make  the  house.  Tag-rag  agreed  with  him.  Then 
there  was  a  little  pause. 

"  Been  to  church,  mem,  this  morning,  mem  ?  "  timidly  in- 
quired Titmouse  of  Miss  Tag-rag. 

"  Yes,  sir,"  she  replied,  faintly  coloring,  casting  her  eyes  to 
the  ground?  and  suddenly  putting  her  hand  into  that  of  her 
mother — with  such  an  innocent,  engaging  simplicity — like  a 
timid  fawn  lying  as  close  as  possible  to  its  dam  !  * 

"  We  always  go  to  chapel,  sir,"  said  Mrs.  Tag-rag  confi- 
dently, in  spite  of  a  very  fierce  look  from  her  husband ;  "  the 
gospel  isn't  preached  in  the  Church  of  England.  We  sit 
under  Mr.  Horror — a  heavenly  preacher !  You've  heard  of 
Mr.  Horror?" 

"  Yes,  mem !  Oh,  yes !  Capital  preacher !  "  replied  Tit- 
mouse, who  of  course  (being  a  true  churchman)  had  never  in 
his  life  heard  of  Mr.  Horror,  or  any  other  dissenter. 

"  When  will  dinner  be  ready,  Mrs.  T.  ?  "  inquired  Tag-rag 
abruptly,  and  -with  a  very  perceptible  dash  of  sternness  in 
his  tone ;.  but  dinner  was  announced  the  very  next  moment. 
He  took  his  wife's  arm,  and  in  doing  so,  gave  it  a  sudden 
vehement  pressure,  which,  coupled  with  a  furious  glance,  ex- 
plained to  her  the  extent  to  which  she  had  incurred  his  an- 
ger. She  thought,  however,  of  Mr.  Horror,  and  was  silent. 

Titmouse's  proffered  arm  the  timid  Miss  Tag-rag  scarcely 
touched  with  the  tip  of  her  finger,  as  she  walked  beside  him 
to  dinner.  Titmouse  soon  got  tolerably  composed  and  cheer- 
ful at  dinner  (which  consisted  of  a  little  piece  of  nice  roast 

*"  Vitas  hinnuleo  me  similis,  Chloe, 
Quserenti  pavidam  mentis  avils 
Matrem. 

et  corde  et  gen  i  bus  tremit." 

HOK.  i.  23. 


162  TEN  THOUSAND  A  TEAR. 

beef,  with  plenty  of  horse-radish,  Yorkshire  pudding,  a  boiled 
fowl,  a  plum-pudding  made  by  Mrs.  Tag-rag,  and  custards 
which  had  been  superintended  by  Miss  Tag-rag),  and,  to 
oblige  his  hospitable  host  and  hostess,  ate  till  he  was  fit  to 
burst.  Miss  Tag-rag,  though  really  very  hungry,  ate  only  a 
very  small  slice  of  beef  and  a  quarter  of  a  custard,  and  drank 
a  third  of  a  glass  of  sherry  after  dinner.  She  never  once 
spoke,  except  in  hurried  answers  to  her  papa  and  mamma ; 
and,  sitting  exactly  opposite  Titmouse  (with  only  a  plate  of 
greens  and  a  boiled  fowl  between  them),  wa's  continually 
coloring  whenever  their  eyes  happened  to  encounter  one  an- 
other, on  which  occasion  hers  would  suddenly  drop,  as  if 
overpowered  by  the  brilliance  of  his.  Titmouse  began  to 
love  her  very  fast.  After  the  ladies  had  withdrawn,  you 
should  have  heard  the  way  that  Tag-rag  went  011  with  Tit- 
mouse—I can  liken  the  two  to  nothing  but  an  old  fat  spider 
and  a  little  fly. 

"  Will  you  come  into  my  parlor  ? 
Said  the  spider  to  the  fly  ; " 

and  it  might  have  been  well  for  Titmouse  to  have  answered, 
in  the  language  of  the  aforesaid  fly  :— 

"  No,  thank  you,  sir,  I  really  feel 
No  curiosity." 

Titmouse,  however,  swallowed  with  equal  facility  Mr. 
Tag-rag's  hard  port  and  his  sof t  blarney ;  but  all  fools  have 
large  swallows.  When  at  length  Tag-rag  alluded  to  the  pain- 
fully evident  embarrassment  of  his  "  poor  Tabby,"  and  said 
he  had  "  now  found  out  what  had  been  so  long  the  matter 
with  her,"  [ay,  even  this  went  down,]  and  hemmed,  and 
winked  his  eye,  and  drained  his  glass,  Titmouse  began  to  get 
flustered,  blushed,  and  hoped  Mr.  Tag-rag  would  soon  "join 
the  ladies."  They  did  so  (Tag-rag  stopping  behind  to  lock  up 
the  wine  and  the  remains  of  the  fruit).  Miss  Tag-rag  pre- 
sided over  the  tea-things.  There  were  muffins,  and  crum- 
pets, and  reeking  hot  buttered  toast ;  Mrs.  Tag-rag  would 
near  of  no  denial,  so  poor  Titmouse,  after  the  most  desperate 
resistance,  was  obliged  to  swallow  a  round  of  toast,  half  a 
muffin,  and  an  entire  crumpet,  and  four  cups  of  hot  tea ;  after 
which  he  felt  a  very  painful  degree  of  turgidity,  and  a  miser- 
able conviction  that  he  should  be  able  to  eat  and  drink 
nothing  more  for  the  remainder  of  the  week. 

After  the  tea-things  had  been  removed,  Tag-rag,  directing 
Titmouse's  attention  to  the  piano,  which  was  open  (with 
some  music  on  it  ready  to  be  played  from),  asked  him 
whether  he  liked  music.  Titmouse,  with  great  eagerness, 
hoped  Miss  T.  would  give  them  some  music  ;  and  she,  after 
holding  out  a  long  and  vigorous  siege,  at  length  asked  her 
papa  what  it  should  be. 


TEN"  THOL'SAifl)  A-YEAH.  163 

"  The  Battle  of  Prague?  said  her  papa. 

"Before  Jehovah's  awful  throne?  hastily  interposed  her 
mamma. 

"The  Battle,"  sternly  repeated  her  papa. 

"  It's  Sunday  night,  Mr.  T .,"  meekly  rejoined  his  wife. 

"  Which  will  you  have,  Mr.  Titmouse  ?  "  inquired  Tag-rag, 
with  The  Battel  of  Prague  written  in  every  feature  of  his 
face,  Titmouse  almost  burst  into  a  state  of  perspiration. 

"  A  little  of  both,  sir,  if  you  please." 

"  Well,"  replied  Tag-rag,  slightly  relaxing,  "  that  will  do. 
Split  the  difference — eh  ?  Come,  Tab,  down  with  you.  Tit- 
mouse, will  you  turn  over  the  music  for  her  ?  " 

Titmouse  rose,  and  having  sheepishly  taken  his  station 
beside  Miss  Tag-rag,  the  performance  commenced  with  Be- 
fore Jehovah's  awful  throne!  But,  mercy  upon  us !  at  what  a 
rate  she  rattled  over  that  "pious  air."  If  its  respectable 
composer  had  been  present,  he  must  have  gone  into  a  fit ;  but 
there  was  no  help  for  it— the  heart  of  the  lovely  performer 
was  in  The  Battle  of  Prague,  to  which  she  presently  did  most 
ample  justice.  So  much  were  her  feelings  engaged  in  that 
sublime  composition,  that  the  bursting  of  one  of  the  strings 
— twang!  in  the  middle  of  the  ''  cannonading"  did  not  at 
all  disturb  her ;  and,  as  soon  as  she  had  finished  the  exquisite 
"finale,"  Titmouse  was  in  such  a  tumult  of  excitement,  from 
different  causes,  that  he  could  have  shed  tears.  Though  he 
had  never  once  turned  over  at  the  right  place,  Miss  Tag-rag 
thanked  him  for  his  services  with  a  smile  of  infinite  sweet- 
ness. Titmouse  vowed  that  he  had  never  heard  such 
splendid  niusic— begged  for  more ;  and  away  went  Miss  Tag- 
rag,  hurried  away  by  her  excitement.  Rondo  after  rondo, 
march  after  march,  for  at  least  half  an  hour ;  at  the  end  of 
which  old  Tag-rag  suddenly  kissed  her  with  passionate  fond- 
ness. Though  Mrs.  Tag-rag  was  horrified  at  the  impiety  of 
all  this,  she  kept  a  very  anxious  eye  on  the  young  couple, 
and  interchanged  with  her  husband,  every  now  and  then, 
very  significant  looks.  Shortly  after  nine,  spirits,  wine,  and 
hot  and  cold  water,  were  brought  in.  At  the  sight  of  them 
Titmouse  looked  alarmed— for  he  knew  that  he  must  take 
something  more,  though  he  would  have  freely  given  five 
shillings  to  be  excused — for  he  felt  as  if  he  could  not  hold 
one  drop  more.  But  it  was  in  vain.  Willy-nilly,  a  glass  of 
gin  and  water  stood  soon  before  him ;  he  protested  he  could 
not  touch  it  unless  Miss  Tag-rag  would  "  take  something  " — 
whereupon,  with  a  blush,  she  "  thought  she  would'"1  take  a 
wine-glassful  of  sherry  and  water.  This  was  provided  her. 
Then  Tag-rag  mixed  a  tumbler  of  port  wine  negus  for  Mrs. 
Tag-rag,  and  a  great  glass  of  mahogany-colored  brandy  and 
water  for  himself ;  and  then  he  looked  round,  and  felt  per- 
fectly happy.  As  Titmouse  advanced  with  his  gin  and  water, 
his  spirits  got  higher  and  higher,  and  his  tongue  more  fluent. 
He  once  or  twice  dropped  the  "  Mr.,"  when  addressing  Tag- 


164  TEN  THOUSAND  A-YEAtt. 

rag ;  several  times  smiled,  and  once  even  winked  at  the  em- 
barrassed Miss  Tag-rag.  Mr.  Tag-rag  saw  it  and  could  not 
control  himself— for  he  had  got  to  the  end  of  his  first  glass  of 
brandy  and  water,  and  mixed  himself  a  second  quite  as 
strong  as  the  former. 

"Tab!  ah,  Tab!  what  has  been  the  matter  with  you  all 
these  months  ?  "—and  he  winked  his  eye  at  her  and  then  at 
Titmouse. 

"  Papa!"  exclaimed  Miss  Tag-rag,  blushing  up  to  her  very 
temples. 

"Ah,  Titmouse— Titmouse— give  me  your  hand,"  said  Tag- 
rag  ;  "  you'll  forget  us  all  when  you're  a  great  man— but  we 
shall  always  remember  you." 

"You're  very  good— very!"  said  Titmouse,  cordially  re- 
turning the  pressure  of  Tag-rag's  hand. — At  that  instant  it 
suddenly  occurred  to  him  to  adopt  the  suggestion  of  Mr. 
Gammon.  Tag-rag  was  going  on  very  fast,  indeed,  about 
the  disinterested  nature  of  his  feelings  towards  Titmouse ; 
towards  whom,  he  said,  he  had  always  felt  just  as  he  did  at 
that  moment — 'twas  in  vain  to  deny  it. 

"  I  am  sure  your  conduct  shows  it,  sir,"  commenced  Tit- 
mouse, feeling  a  shudder  like  that  with  which  a  timid 
bather  approaches  the  margin  of  the  cold  stream.  "  I  could 
have  taken  my  oath,  sir,  you  would  have  refused  to  let  me 
come  into  your  house,  when  you  heard  of  it — 

"  Ah  ha ! — that's  rather  an  odd  idea,  too.  If  I  felt  a  true 
friendship  for  you  as  plain  Titmouse,  it's  so  likely  I  should 
have  cut  you  just  when— ahem !  My  dear  sir !  it  was  1  that 
thought  you  wouldn't  have  come  into  my  house !  A  likely 
thing!" 

Titmouse  was  puzzled.  His  perceptions,  never  very  quick 
or  clear,  were  now  undoubtedly  somewhat  obfuscated  with 
what  he  had  been  drinking.  In  short,  he  did  not  understand 
that  Tag-rag  had  not  understood  him:  and  felt  rather 
baffled. 

"  What  surprising  ups  and  downs  there  are  in  life,  Mr. 
Titmouse !  "  said  Mrs.  Tag-rag  respectfully—"  they're  all  sent 
from  above,  to  try  us  !  No  one  knows  how  they'd  behave, 
if  as  how  (in  a  manner)  they  were  turned  upside  down." 

"I— I  hope,  mem,  I  haven't  done  anything  to  show 
that  I " 

"  Oh !  my  dear  Titmouse,"  anxiously  interrupted  Tag-rag, 
inwardly  cursing  his  wife,  who,  finding  she  always  went 
wrong  in  her  husband's  eyes  whenever  she  spoke  a  word, 
determined  for  the  future  to  stick  to  her  negus— "  the  fact  is, 
there's  a  Mr.  Horror  here  that's  for  sending  decent  people 

to .    He's  filled  my  wife  with  all  sorts  of nay,  if  she 

isn't  bursting  with  cant— so  never  mind  her.  You  done 
anything  wrong!  You're  a  pattern  of  modesty  and  pro- 
priety—your hand,  my  clear  Titmouse !" 

"  Well— I'm  a  happy  man  again,"  resumed  Titmouse,  re« 


TEN  THOUSAND  A-YEAR.  165 

solved  now  to  go  on  with  his  adventure.  "  And  when  did 
they  tell  you  ol  it,  sir  ?  " 

"  Oh,  a  few  days  ago— a  week  ago,"  replied  Tag-rag,  trying 
to  recollect. 

"  Why— why — sir— a'n't  you  mistaken  ?  ''  inquired  Tit- 
mouse, with  a  depressed,  but  at  the  same  time  a  surprised 
air.  "  It  only  happened  this  morning,  after  you  left 

'*  Eh  ?  eh  ?  ah,  ha !  What  do  you  mean,  Mr.  Titmouse  ?  " 
interrupted  Mr.  Tag-rag,  with  a  faint  attempt  at  a  smile. 
Mrs.  Tag-rag  and  Sliss  Tag-rag  also  turned  exceedingly 
startled  faces  towards  Titmouse,  who  felt  as  if  a  house  were 
going  to  fall  down  on  him. 

"  Why,  sir,,  he  began  to  cry,  (an  attempt  which  was  greatly 
aided  by  the  maudlin  condition  to  which  drink  had  reduced 
him,)  "  till  to-day,  I  thought  I  was  heir  to  ten  thousand  a- 
year,  and  it  seems  I'm  not ;  it's  all  a  mistake  of  those  cursed 
people  at  Saffron  Hill !" 

Tag-rag',s  face  changed  visibly,  and  showed  the  desperate 
shock  he  had  just  sustained.  His  inward  agony  -was  forcing 
out  on  hi,'),  slanting  forehead  great  drops  of  perspiration. 

"  What  a  capital  joke  Mr.  Titmouse  ah,  ha !  "  he 
gasped,  hastily  passing  his  handkerchief  over  his  forehead. 
Titmouse,  though  greatly  alarmed,  stood  to  his  gun  pretty 
steadily. 

"I — I  wish  it  was  a  joke!  It's  been  no  joke  to  me,  sir. 
There's  another  Tittlebat  Titmouse,  it  seems,  in  Snore- 
ditch,  that's  the  right " 

"  Who  told  you  this,  sir  ?  Pho,  I  don't — I  can't  believe  it," 
said  Tag-rag,  in  a  voice  tremulous  between  suppressed  rage 
and  fear. 

"  True  though,  'pon  my  life !    It  is>  so  help  me " 

"  How  dare  you  swear  before  ladies,  sir  ?  You're  insulting 
them,  sir!  "  cried  Tag-rag,  trembling  with  rage.  ''And  in 
my  presence,  sir?  You're  not  a  gentleman!  "  He  suddenly 
dropped  his  voice,  and,  in  a  trembling  and  most  earnest 
manner,  asked  Titmouse  whether  he  was  really  joking  or 
serious. 

"  Never  more  serious  in  my  life,  sir  ;  and  enough  to  make 
me  so,  sir !  "  replied  Titmouse  in  a  lamentable  manner. 

"  You  mean  to  tell  me  it's  all  a  mistake,  then,  and  you're 
no  more  than  you  always  were  ?  "  inquired  Tag-rag,  with  a 
desperate  attempt  to  speak  calmly. 

"  Oh  yes,  sir !  Yes !  cried  Titmouse  mournfully ;  "  and  if 
you'll  only  be  so  kind  as  to  let  me  serve  you  as  I  used.  You 
know  it  was  no  fault  of  mine,  sir.  They  would  tell  me  it 
was  so ! " 

'Tis  impossible  to  conceive  a  more  disgusting  expression 
than  the  repulsive  features  that  Tag-rag  wore  at  that 
moment,  while  he  gazed  in  ominous  and  agitated  silence  at 
Titmouse.  His  lips  quivered,  and  he  seemed  incapable  of 
speaking. 


166  TEN  THOUSAND  A-YEAR. 

"  Oh,  ma,  I  do  feel  so  ill ! "  faintly  exclaimed  Miss  Tag-rag, 
turning  deadly  pale.  Titmouse  was  on  the  verge  of  dropping 
on  his  knees  and  confessing  the  trick,  greatly  agitated  at 
the  effect  produced  on  Miss  Tag-rag ;  when  Tag-rag's  heavy 
hand  was  suddenly  placed  on  his  shoulder,  and  he  whispered 
in  a  fierce  undertone,  "You're  an  impostor,  sir!"  which 
arrested  Titmouse,  and  made  something  like  a  MAN  of  him. 
He  was  a  fearful  fool,  but  he  did  not  want  for  mere  pluck  ; 
and  now  it  was  roused.  Mrs.  Tag-rag  exclaimed,  "  Oh,  you 
shocking  scamp !  "  as  she  passed  1  itmouse,  and  led  her 
daughter  out  of  the  room. 

"  Then  an  impostor,  sir,  a'n't  fit  company  for  you,  of  course, 
sir!"  said  Titmouse,  rising,  and  trembling  with  mingled 
apprehension  and  anger. 

Pay  me  my  five-pound  note  !  "  almost  shouted  Tag-rag, 
furiously  tightening  the  grasp  by  which  he  held  Titmouse  s 
collar. 

"  Well,  sir,  and  I  will,  if  you'll  only  take  your  hand  off  ? 
Hollo,  sir — What  the  de— Leave  go,  sir  I  Hands  off !  Are 
you  going  to  murder  me  ?  I'll  pay  you,  and  done  with  you, 
sir,"  stammered  Titmouse : — when  a  faint  scream  was  heard, 
plainly  from  Miss  Tag-rag,  overhead,  and  in  hysterics.  Then 
the  seething  caldron  boiled  over.  You  infernal  scoundrel! " 
said  Tag-rag,  almost  choked  with  fury ;  and  suddenly  seizing 
Titmouse  by  the  collar,  scarce  giving  him  time,  in  passing, 
to  get  hold  of  his  hat  and  stick,  he  urged  him  along  througn 
the  passage,  down  the  gravel  walk,  threw  open  the  gate, 
thrust  him  furiously  through  it,  and  sent  after  him  such  a 
blast  of  execration,  as  was  enough  to  drive  him  a  hundred 
yards  down  the  road.  Titmouse  did  not  fully  recover  his 
breath  or  his  senses  for  a  long  while  afterwards.  When  he 
did,  the  first  thing  "he  felt  was  an  inclination  to  fall  down  on 
his  knees  on  the  open  road,  and  worship  the  sagacious  and 
admirable  GAMMOX,  who  had  so  exactly  predicted  what  had 
come  to  pass ! 

And  now,  Mr.  Titmpuse,  for  some  little  time  I  have  done 
with  you.  Away !— give  room  to  your  betters.  But  don't 
think  that  I  have  yet  "  rifled  all  your  sweetness,"  or  am  yet 
about  to  "fling  you  like  a  noisome  weed  away." 


CHAPTER  VII. 


WHILE  the  lofty  door  of  a  house  in  Grosvenor  Street  might 
be  imagined  yet  quivering  under  the  shock  of  a  previously 
announced  dinner-arrival,  one  of  the  servants  who  were  stand- 
ing behind  a  carriage  which  approached  from  the  direction  of 
Piccadilly  slipped  off,  and  in  a  twinkling,  with  a  thun-thun- 
thunder-under-under,—  thunder-runder-runder,  thun-thun- 
thun !  and  a  shrill  thrilling  whir-r-r  of  the  bell,  announced  the 


TEN  THOUSAND  A-YEAR.  167 

arrival  of  the  Duke  of ,  the  last  guest.    It  was  a  large  and 

plain  carriage,  but  perfectly  well  known  ;  and  before  the  door 
of  the  house  at  which  it  had  drawn  up  pad  been  opened,  dis- 
playing some  four  or  five  servants  standing  in  the  hall,  in  sim- 
ple but  elegant  liveries,  half-a-dozen  passengers  had  stopped 
to  see  get  out  of  the  carriage  an  elderly,  middle-sized  man,with 
a  somewhat  spare  figure,  dressed  in  plain  black  clothes,  with 
iron-gray  hair,  and  a  countenance  which,  once  seen,  was  not 
to  be  forgotten.  That  was  a  great  man  ;  one,  the  like  of  whom 
many  previous  centuries  had  not  seen ;  whose  name  shot 
terror  into  the  hearts  of  all  the  enemies  of  old  England  all 
over  the  world,  and  fond  pride  and  admiration  into  the  hearts 
of  his  fellow-countrymen. 

"  A  quarter  to  eleven ! "  he  said,  in  a  quiet  tone,  to  the 
servant  who  was  holding  open  the  carriage-door—while  the 
bystanders  took  off  their  hats  ;  a  courtesy  which  he  acknowl- 
edged, as  he  slowly  stepped  across  the  pavement,  by  touch- 
ing bis  hat  in  a  mechanical  sort  of  way  with  his  forefinger. 
The  house-door  then  closed  upon  him:  the  handful  of  on- 
lookers passed  away ;  off  rolled  the  empty  carriage,  and  all 
without  was  quiet  as  before.  The  house  was  that  of  Mr. 
Aubrey,  one  of  the  members  for  the  borough  of  YATTON,  in 
Yorkshire— a  man  of  rapidly  rising  importance  in  Parlia- 
ment. Surely  his  was  a  pleasant  position— that  of  an  indepen- 
dent country  gentleman,  a  member  ?f  one  of  the  most  ancient 
noble  families  in  England,  with  a  clear  unincumbered  rent- 
roll  of  ten  thousand  a-year,  and  already,  in  only  his  thirty- 
fourth  year,  and  spokesman  of  his  class,  and  promising  to 
become  one  of  the  ablest  debaters  in  the  House !  Parliament 
having  been  assembled,  in  consequence  of  a  particular  emer- 
gency, at  a  much  earlier  period  than  usual,  the  House  of 
Commons,  in  which  Mr.  Aubrey  had  the  evening  before  de- 
livered a  well-timed  and  powerful  speech,  had  acljourned  for 
the  Christmas  recess,  the  House  of  Lords  being  about  to  fol- 
low its  example  that  evening  :  an  important  division,  how- 
ever, being  first  expected  to  take  place  at  a  late  hour.  Mr. 
Aubrey  was  warmly  complimented  on  his  success  by  several 
of  the  select  and  brilliant  circle  then  assembled ;  and  who 
were  all  in  high  spirits— on  account  of  a  considerable  tri- 
umph just  obtained  by  their  party,  and  to  which  Mr.  Aubrey 
was  assured,  by  even  the  Duke  of ,his  exertions  had  cer- 
tainly not  a  little  contributed.  While  his  Grace  was  ener- 
getically intimating  to  Mr.  Aubrey  his  opinion  to  this  effect, 
there  were  two  lovely  women  listening  to  him  with  intense 
eagerness— they  were  the  wife  and  sister  of  Mr.  Aubrey.  The 
former  was  an  elegant  and  interesting  woman— with  raven 
hair,  and  a  complexion  of  dazzling  fairness — of  nearly  eight- 
and-twenty ;  the  latter  was  a  really  beautiful  girl,  somewhere 
between  twenty  and  twenty-one.  Both  were  dressed  with 
the  utmost  simplicity  and  elegance.  Mrs.  Aubrey,  most 
doatingly  fond  of  her  husband,  and  a  blooming  young  mother 


168  TEN  THOUSAND  A-YEAR. 

of  two  as  charming  children  as  were  to  be  met  with  in  a 
day's  walk  all  over  both  the  parks,  was,  in  character  and 
manners,  all  pliancy  and  gentleness ;  while  about  Miss  Au- 
brey there  was  a  dash  of  spirit  that  gave  an  infinite  zest  to 
her  beauty.  Her  blue  eyes  beamed  with  the  richest  expres- 
sion of  feeling— in  short,  Catharine  Aubrey  was,  both  in  face 
and  figure,  a  downright  English  beauty ;  and  she  knew— 
truth  must  be  told— that  such  she  appeared  to  the  Great  Duke 
whose  cold  aquiline  eye  she  often  felt  to  be  settled  upon  her 
with  satisfaction.  The  fact  was,  that  he  had  penetrated  at 
a  first  glance  beneath  the  mere  surface  of  an  arch,  sweet  and 
winning  manner,  and  detected  a  certain  strength  of  charac- 
ter in  Miss  Aubrey  which  gave  him  more  than  usual  inter- 
est in  her,  and  spread  over  his  iron-cast  features  a  pleasant 
expression,  relaxing  their  sternness.  It  might  indeed  be 
said,  that  before  her,  in  his  person, 

"  Grim-visaged  war  had  smooth'd  his  wrinkled  front." 

'Twas  a  subject  for  a  painter,  that  delicate  and  blooming 
girl,  her  auburn  hair  hanging  in  careless  grace  on  each  side 
of  her  white  forehead,  while  her  eyes, 

"  That  might  have  soothed  a  tiger's  rage, 
Or  thaw'd  the  cold  heart  of  a  conqueror," 

were  fixed  with  absorbed  interest  on  the  stern  and  rigid 
countenance  which  she  reflected  had  been,  as  it  were,  a  thou- 
sand times  darkened  with  the  smoke  of  the  grisly  battle-field, 
But  I  must  not  forget  that  there  are  others  in  the  room ;  and 
amongst  them,  standing  at  a  little  distance,  is  Lord  De  la 
Zouch,  one  of  Mr.  Aubrey's  neighbors  in  Yorkshire.  Ap- 
parently he  is  listening  to  a  brother  peer  talking  to  him  very 
earnestly  about  the  expected  division;  but  Lord  De  la 
Zouch's  eye  is  fixed  on  you,  lovely  Kate — and  how  little  can 
you  imagine  what  is  passing  through  his  mind?  It  has 
just  occurred  to  him  that  nis  sudden  arrangement  for 
young  Delamere— his  own  son  and  heir,  come  up  the  clay  be- 
fore from  Oxford — to  call  for  him  about  half-past  ten,  and 
take  his  place  in  Mrs.  Aubrey's  drawing-room,  while  he, 
Lord  De  la  Zouch,  goes  down  to  the  House — may  be  attend- 
ed with  certain  consequences.  He  is  speculating  on  the  ef- 
fect of  your  beauty  bursting  suddenly  on  his  son— who  has 
not  seen  you  for  nearly  two  years  ;  all  this  gives  him  anxiety 
— for,  dear  Kate,  he  knows  that  your  forehead  would  wear 
the  ancient  coronet  of  the  De  la  Zouches  with  grace  and  dig- 
nity. But  Delamere  is  as  yet  too  young  and  if  he  gets  the 
image  of  Catharine  Aiibrey  into  nis  head,  it  will,  fears  his 
father,  instantly  cast  into  the  shade  and  displace  all  the 
stern  visages  of  those  old  poets,  orators,  historians,  philoso- 
phers, and  statesmen,  who  ought,  in  Lord  De  la  Zouch  and 


TEN  THOUSAND  A-YEAR.  169 

his  son's  tutor's  judgment,  to  occupy  exclusively  the  head 
of  the  aforesaid  Delamere  for  some  five  years  to  come.  That 
youngster— happy  fellow  !— frank,  high-spirited,  and  enthu- 
siastic—and handsome  to  boot  —was  heir  to  an  ancient  title 
and  great  estates  ;  all  that  his  father  had  considered  in  look- 
ing  out  for  an  alliance  was— youth,  health,  beauty,  blood- 
here  they  all  were  ;— and  fortune  too— bah !  what  did  it  sig- 
nify to  his  son— but  at  any  rate,  'twas  not  to  be  thought  of 
for  some  years. 

"  Suppose,"  said  he  aloud,  though  in  a  musing  manner, 
"  one  were  to  say— twenty-four— 

"  Twenty-four/"  echoed  his  companion  with  amazement; 
"  my  dear  De  la  Zouch,  what  the  deuce  do  you  mean  ?  Eighty- 
four  at  the  very  lowest !  " 

"  Eh  ?  what '?  oh— yes,  of  course— I  should  say  ninety— I 
mean— hem  \-they  will  muster  about  twenty-four  only." 

"  Ah— I  beg  your  pardon  I— there  you're  right,  I  dare  say." 
Here  the  announcement  of  dinner  put  an  end  to  the  colloquy 
of  the  two  statesmen.  Lord  De  la  Zouch  led  down  Miss 
Aubrey  with  an  air  of  the  inost  delicate  and  cordial  courtesy ; 
and  felt  almost  disposed,  in  the  heat  of  the  moment,  to  tell 
her  that  he  had  arranged  all  in  his  own  mind— that  if  she 
willed  it,  she  had  his  hearty  consent  to  become  the  future 
Lady  De  la  Zouch.  He  was  himself  the  eleventh  who  had 
come  to  the  title  in  direct  descent  from  father  to  son  ;  'twas 
a  point  he  was  not  a  little  nervous  and  anxious  about — he 
detested  collateral  succession— and  he  made  himself  infinitely 
agreeable  to  Miss  Aubrey  as  he  sat  beside  her  at  dinner ! 

The  Duke  of sat  on  the  right  hand  side  of  Mrs.  Aubrey, 

seemingly  in  high  spirits,  and  she  appeared  proud  enough  of 
her  supporter.  It  was  a  delightful  dinner-party,  elegant  with- 
out ostentation,  and  select  without  pretense  of  exclusiveness. 
All  were  cheerful  and  animated,  not  merely  on  account 
of  the  over-night's  parliamentary  victory,  which  1  have 
already  alluded  to,  but  also  in  contemplation  of  the  coming 
Christmas  ;  how,  and  where,  and  witn  whom  each  was  to 
spend  that  "  righte  merrie  season,"  being  the  chief  topic  of 
conversation.  As  there  was  nothing  peculiar  in  the  dinner, 
and  as  I  have  no  turn  for  describing  such  matters  in  detail 
— the  clatter  of  plate,  the  jingling  of  silver,  the  sparkling  of 
wines,  and  so  forth— I  shall  request  the  reader  to  imagine 
himself  led  by  me  quietly  out  of  the  dining-room  into  the 
library — thus  escaping  from  all  the  bustle  and  hubbub  at- 
tendant upon  such  an  entertainment  as  is  going  on  in  the 
front  of  the  house.  We  shall  be  alone  in  the  library— here  it 
is ;  we  enter  it,  and  shut  the  door.  'Tis  a  spacious  room,  all 
the  sides  covered  with  books,  of  which  Mr.  Aubrey  is  a  great 
collector — and  the  clear  red  fire  (which  we  must  presently 
replenish,  or  it  will  go  out)  is  shedding  a  subdued  ruddy  light 
on  all  the  objects  in  the  room,  very  favorable  for  our  purpose. 
The  ample  table  is  covered  with  books  and  papers ;  and  there 


170  TEN  THOUSAND  A-YEAS. 

is  an  antique-looking  arm-chair  drawn  opposite  to  the  fire,  in 
•which  Mr.  Aubrey  has  been  indulging  in  a  long  reverie  till 
the  moment  of  quitting  it  to  go  and  dress  for  dinner.  This 
chair  I  shall  sit  in  myself;  you  may  draw  out  from  the 
recess  for  yourself,  one  of  two  little  sloping  easy-chairs,  which 
have  been  placed  there  by  Mrs.  and  Miss  Aubrey  for  their 
own  sole  use,  considering  that  they  are  excellent  judges  of 
the  period  at  which  Mr.  Aubrey  has  been  long  enough  alone, 
and  at  which  they  should  come  in  and  gossip  with  him.  We 
may  as  well  draw  the  dusky  green  curtains  across  the  window, 
through  which  the  moon  shines  at  present  rather  too  brightly. 
— So,  new,  after  coaxing  up  the  lire,  I  will  proceed  to  tell  you 
a  little  bit  of  pleasant  family  history. 

The  Aubreys  are  a  Yorkshire  family— the  younger  branch 
of  the  ancient  and  noble  family  of  the  JDreddlingtons.  Their 
residence,  YATTON,  is  in  the  north-eastern  part  of  the  country, 
not  above  fifteen  or  twenty  miles  from  the  sea.  The  hall  is 
one  of  those  old  structures,  the  sight  of  which  throws  you 
back  at  least  a  couple  of  centuries  in  our  English  history. 
It  stands  in  a  park,  crowded  with  trees,  many  of  them  of 
great  age  and  size,  and  under  which  some  two  hundred  head 
of  deer  perform  their  capricious  and  graceful  gambols.  In 
approaching  from  London,  you  strike  off  the  great  north 
road  into  a  broad  by-way ;  after  going  down  which  for  about 
a  mile,  you  come  to  a  struggling  little  village  called  Yatton, 
at  the  further  extremity  of  which  stands  a  little  aged  gray 
church,  with  a  tall  thin  spire :  an  immense  yew-tree,  with  a 
kind  of  friendly  gloom,  overshadowing,  in  the  little  church- 
yard, nearly  half  the  graves.  Rather  in  the  rear  of  the 
church  is  the  vicarage-house,  snug  and  sheltered  by  a  line 
of  fir-trees.  After  walking  on  about  eighty  yards,  you  come 
to  the  high  park-gates,  and  see  a  lodge  just  within,  on  the 
left-hand  side,  sheltered  by  an  elm-tree.  You  then  wind 
your  way  for  about  two-thirds  of  a  mile  along  a  gravel  walk, 
amongst  the  thickening  trees,  till  you  come  to  a  ponderous 
old  crumbling-looking  red  brick  gateway  of  the  time  of 
Henry  VII.,  with  one  or  two  deeply  set  stone  windows  in  the 
turrets,  and  mouldering  stone- capped  battlements  peeping 
through  high-climbing  ivy.  There  is  an  old  escutcheon  im- 
mediately over  the  point  of  the  arch ;  and  as  you  pass  under- 
neath, if  you  look  up  you  can  see  the  groove  of  the  old  port- 
cullis still  remaining.  Having  passed  under  this  castellated 
remnant,  you  enter  a  kind  of  court,  formed  by  a  high  wall 
completely  covered  with  ivy,  running  along  in  a  line  from 
the  right-hand  turret  of  the  gateway  till  it  joins  the  house. 
Along  its  course  are  a  number  of  yew-trees.  In  the  centre 
of  the  open  space  is  a  quaintly  disposed  grass-plat,  dotted 
about  with  stunted  box,  and  in  the  centre  of  that  stands  a 
weather-beaten  stone  sundial.  The  house  itself  is  a  large 
irregular  pile  of  dull  red  brickwork,  with  great  stacks  of 
chimneys  in  the  rear ;  the  body  of  the  building  has  evidently 


TEN  THOUSAND  A-YEAE.  171 

been  erected  at  different  times.  Some  part  is  evidently  in 
the  style  of  Queen  Elizabeth's  reign,  another  in  that  of  Queen 
Anne  :  and  it  is  plain  that  on  the  site  of  the  present  structure 
has  formerly  stood  a  castle.  There  are,  indeed,  traces  of  the 
old  moat  still  visible  round  the  rear  of  the  house.  One  of 
the  ancient  towers,  with  small  deep  stone  windows,  still 
remains,  giving  its  venerable  support  to  the  right-hand  ex- 
tremity of  the  building,  as  you  stand  with  your  face  to  the 
door.  The  long  frontage  of  the  house  consists  of  two  huge 
masses  of  dusky-red  brickwork,  (you  can  hardly  call  them 
icings,)  connected  together  by  a  lower  building  in  the  centre, 
which  contains  the  hall.  There  are  three  or  four  rows  of 
long  thin  deep  windows,  with  heavy-looking  wooden  sashes. 
The  high-pitched  roof  is  of  slate,  and  has  deep  projecting 
eaves,  forming,  in  fact,  a  bold  wooden  cornice  running  along 
the  whole  length  of  the  building,  which  is  some  two  or  three 
stories  high.  At  the  left  extremity  stand  a  clump  of  ancient 
cedars  of  Lebanon,  feathering  in  evergreen  beauty  down  to 
the  ground.  The  hall  is  large  and  lofty ;  the  floor  is  of 
polished  oak,  almost  the  whole  of  which  is  covered  with  thick 
matting;  it  is  wainscoted  all  round  with  black  oak;  some 
seven  or  eight  full-length  pictures,  evidently  of  considerable 
antiquity,  being  let  into  the  panels.  Quaint  figures  these 
are  to  be  sure ;  and  if  they  resemble  the  ancestors  of  the 
Aubrey  family,  those  ancestors  must  have  been  singular  and 
startling  persons !  The  faces  are  quite  white  and  staring — 
all  as  if  in  wonder ;  and  they  have  such  long  thin  legs  !  end- 
ing in  sharp-pointed  shoes.  On  each  side  of  the  ample  fire- 
place stands  a  figure  in  full  armor ;  and  there  are  also  ranged 
along  the  wall  old  helmets,  cuirasses,  swords,  lances,  battle- 
axes,  and  cross-bows,  the  very  idea  of  wearing,  wielding, 
and  handling  which  makes  your  arms  ache  while  you  exclaim, 
"  they  must  have  been  giants  in  those  days ! "  On  one  side 
of  this  hall,  a  door  opens  into  the  dining-room,  beyond  which 
is  the  library ;  on  the  other  side  a  door  leads  you  into  a  noble 
room,  where  stands  a  very  fine  organ.  Out  of  both  the  din- 
ing-room and  drawing-room  you  pass  up  a  staircase  contain- 
ed in  an  old  square  tower;  two  sides  of  each  of  them,  open- 
ing on  the  old  quadrangle,  lead  into  a  gallery  running  all 
round  it,  and  into  which  all  the  bed-rooms  open.— But  I  need 
not  go  into  further  detail.  Altogether  it  is  truly  a  fine  old 
mansion.  Its  only  constant  occupant  is  Mrs.  Aubrey,  the 
mother  of  Mr.  Aubrey,  in  whose  library  we  are  now  seated. 
She  is  a  widow,  having  survived  her  husband,  who  twice 
was  one  of  the  county  members,  about  fifteen  years.  Mr. 
Aubrey  is  her  first-born  child,  Miss  Aubrey  her  last ;  four 
intervening  children  she  has  followed  to  the  grave— the  grief 
and  suffering  consequent  upon  which  have  sadly  shaken  her 
constitution,  and  made  her,  both  in  actual  health  and  in  ap- 
pearance, at  least  ten  years  older  than  she  really  is— for  she 
has,  in  point  of  fact,  not  long  since  entered  her  sixtieth  year. 


172  TEN  THOUSAND  A-YEAB. 

What  a  blessed  life  she  leads  at  Yatton !  Her  serene  and 
cheerful  temper  makes  every  one  happy  about  her ;  and  her 
charity  is  unbounded,  but  dispensed  with  a  most  just  dis- 
crimination. One  \yay  or  another,  almost  a  fourth  of  the  vil- 
lage are  direct  pensioners  upon  her  bounty.  You  have  only 
to  mention  the  name  of  Madam  Aubrey,  the  lady  of  Yatton, 
to  witness  involuntary  homage  paid  to  her  virtues.  Her 
word  is  law ;  and  well  indeed  it  may  be.  While  Mr.  Aubrey, 
her  husband,  was  to  the  last  somewhat  stern  in  his  temper 
and  reserved  in  his  habits,  bearing  withal  a  spotless  and 
lofty  character,  she  was  always  what  she  still  is,  meek,  gen- 
tle, accessible,  charitable,  and  pious.  On  his  death  she  with- 
drew from  the  world,  and  has  ever  since  resided  at  Yatton— 
never  having  quitted  it  for  a  single  day.  There  are  in  the 
vicinity  one  or  two  stately  families,  with  ancient  name, 
sounding  title  and  great  possessions ;  but  for  ten  miles 
round  Yatton,  old  Madam  Aubrey,  the  squire's  mother,  is 
the  name  that  is  enshrined  in  people's  kindliest  and  most 
grateful  feelings,  and  receives  their  readiest  homage.  Tis 
perhaps  a  very  small  matter  to  mention,  but  there  is  at  the 
hall  a  great  white  old  mare,  Peggy,  that  for  these  twenty 
years,  in  all  weathers,  hath  been  the  bearer  of  Madam's 
bounty.  A  thousand  times  hath  she  carried  Jacob  Jones 
(now  a  pensioned  servant,  whose  hair  is  as  white  as  Peggy's) 
all  over  the  estate,  and  also  oft  beyond  it,  with  comfortable 
matters  for  the  sick  and  poor.  Most  commonly  there  are  a 
couple  of  stone  bottles  filled  with  cowslip,  currant,  ginger,  or 
elderberry  wine,  slung  before  old  Jones  over  the  well-worn 
saddle — to  the  carrying  of  which  Peggy  has  got  so  accustom- 
ed, that  she  does  not  go  comfortably  without  them.  She  has 
so  fallen  into  the  habits  of  old  Jones,  who  is  an  inveterate 
gossip,  (Madam  having  helped  to  make  him  such  by  the  nu- 
merous inquiries  she  makes  of  him  every  morning  as  to  every 
one  in  the  village  and  on  the  estate,  and  which  inquiries  he 
must  have  the  means  of  answering,)  that  slow  as  he  jogs 
along,  if  ever  she  meets  or  is  overtaken  by  any  one,  she  stops 
of  her  own  accord,  as  if  to  hear  what  they  and  her  rider  have 
to  say  to  one  another.  She  is  a  great  favorite  with  all,  and 
gets  a  mouthful  of  hay  or  grass  at  every  place  she  stops  at, 
either  from  the  children  or  the  old  people.  When  old  Peggy 
comes  to  die,  she  will  be  missed  by  all  the  folk  around  Yat- 
ton. Madam  Aubrey,  growing,  I  am  sorry  to  say,  very  fee- 
ble, cannot  go  about  as  much  as  she  used,  and  betakes  herself 
oftener  and  oftener  to  the  old  family  coach  ;  and  when  she  is 
going  to  drive  about  the  neighborhood,  you  may  almost  al- 
ways see  it  stop  at  the  vicarage  for  old  Dr.  Tatham,  who  gen 
erally  accompanies  her.  On  these  occasions  she  always  has 
a  bag  containing  Testaments  and  Prayer-books,  which  are 
principally  distributed  as  rewards  to  those  whom  the  parson 
can-  recommend  as  deserving  of  them.  For  these  five-and- 
twenty  years  she  has  never  missed  giving  a  copy  of  each  to 


TEN  THOUSAND  A-YEAR.  173 

every  child  in  the  village  on  the  estate,  on  its  being  confirm- 
ed ;  imd  the  old  lady  looks  around  very  keenly  every  Sunday, 
from  her  pew,  to  see  that  these  Bibles  and  Prayer-books  are 
reverently  used.  I  could  go  on  for  an  hour  and  longer,  tell- 
ing you  these  and  other  such  matters  of  this  exemplary  lady; 
but  we  shall  by  and  by  have  some  opportunities  of  seeing  and 
knowing  more  of  her  personally.  Her  features  are  delicate, 
and  have  been  very  handsome ;  and  in  manner  she  is  very 
calm,  and  quiet,  and  dignified.  She  looks  all  that  you  could 
expect  from  what  I  have  told  you.  The  briskness  of  youth, 
the  sedate  firmness  of  middle-age,  have  years  since  given 
place,  as  you  will  see  with  some  pain,  to  the  feebleness  pro- 
duced by  ill  health  and  mental  suffering— for  she  mourned 
after  her  children  with  all  a  fond  and  bereaved  mother's  love. 
Oh !  how  she  doats  upon  her  surviving  son  and  daughter ! 
And  are  they  not  worthy  of  such  a  mother? 

Mr.  Aubrey  is  in  his  thirty-fourth  year ;  and  inherits  the 
mental  qualities  of  both  his  parents— the  demeanor  and  per- 
son of  his  father.  He  has  a  reserve  that  is  not  cynical,  out 
only  diffident ;  yet  it  gives  him,  at  least  at  first  sight,  and  till 
you  have  become  familiar  with  his  features,  which  are  of  a 
cast  at  once  refined  and  aristocratic,  yet  full  of  goodness,  an 
air  of  hauteur,  which  is  very — very  far  from  his  real  nature. 
He  has  in  truth  the  soft  heart  and  benignant  temper  of  his 
mother,  joined  with  the  masculine  firmness  of  character 
which  belonged  to  his  father ;  which,  however,  is  in  danger 
of  being  seriously  impaired  by  inaction.  Sensitive  he  is,  per- 
haps to  a  fault.  There  is  a  tone  of  melancholy  or  pensive- 
ness  in  his  composition,  which  has  probably  increased  upon 
him  from  his  severe  studies,  ever  since  his  youth.  He  is  a 
man  of  superior  intellect,  and  is  a  capital  scholar.  At  Ox- 
ford he  plucked  the  prize  of  Double  First  from  a  host  of 
strong  competitors,  and  has  since  justified  the  expectations 
which  were  entertained  of  him.  He  has  made  several  really 
valuable  contributions  to  historic  literature — indeed,  I  think 
he  is  even  now  engaged  upon  some  researches  calculated  to 
throw  much  light  upon  the  obscure  origin  of  several  of  our 
political  institutions.  He  has  entered  upon  politics  with  un- 
common—perhaps with  an  excessive— ardor.  I  think  he  is 
likely  to  make  an  eminent  figure  in  Parliament ;  for  he  is  a 
man  of  very  clear  head,  very  patient,  of  business-like  habits, 
ready  in  debate,  and,  moreover,  has  a  very  impressive  deliv- 
ery as  a  public  speaker.  He  is  generous  and  charitable  as 
his  admirable  mother,  and  careless,  even  to  a  fault,  of  his 
pecuniary  interests.  He  is  a  man  of  perfect  simplicity  and 
purity  of  character.  Above  all,  his  virtues  are  the  virtues 
which  have  been  sublimed  by  Christianity— as  it  were,  the 
cold  embers  of  morality  warmed  into  religion.  He  stands 
happily  equidistant  from  infidelity  and  fanaticism.  He  has 
looked  for  light  from  above,  and  has  heard  a  voice  saying, 
"  Tliis  is  the  way,  walk  thou  in  it."  His  piety  is  the  real 


174  TEN  THOUSAND  A-YEAR. 

source  of  that  happy  consistent  dignity,  and  content,  and 
firmness,  which  have  earned  him  the  respect  of  all  who  know 
him,  and  will  bear  him  through  whatever  may  befall  him. 
He  who  standeth  upon  this  rock  connot  be  moved,  perhaps 
not  even  touched,  by  the  surges  of  worldly  reverses— of  diffi- 
culty and  distress.  In  a  manner  Mr.  Aubrey  is  calm  and  gen- 
tleman-like ;  in  person  he  is  rather  above  the  middle  height, 
and  of  slight  make.  From  the  way  in  which  his  clothes  hang 
about  him,  a  certain  sharpness  at  his  shoulders  catching  the 
eye  of  an  observer— you  would  feel  an  anxiety  about  his 
health,  which  would  be  increased  by  hearing  of  the  mortality 
in  his  family ;  and  your  thoughts  are  perhaps  pointed  in  the 
same  direction,  by  a  glance  at  his  long,  thin,  delicate,  white 
hands.  His  countenance  has  a  serene  manliness  about  it 
when  in  repose,  and  great  acuteness  and  vivacity  when  ani- 
mated. His  hair,  not  very  full ;  is  black  as  jet,  and  his  fore- 
head ample  and  marked. 

Mr.  Aubrey  has  been  married  about  six  years  ;  'twas  a  case 
of  love  at  first  sight.  Chance  threw  him  in  the  way  of  Ag- 
nes St.  Clair,  within  a  few  weeks  after  she  had  been  bereav- 
ed of  her  only  parent.  Colonel  St.  Clair?  a  man  of  old  but  im- 
poverished family,  who  fell  in  the  Peninsular  war.  Had  he 
lived  only  a  montn  or  two  longer,  he  would  have  succeeded 
to  a  considerable  estate  ;  as  it  was,  he  left  his  only  child 
comparatively  penniless  ;  but  Heaven  had  endowed  her  with 
personal  beauty,  with  a  lovely  disposition,  and  superior  un- 
derstanding. It  was  not  till  after  along  and  anxious  wooing, 
backed  by  the  cordial  entreaties  of  Mrs.  Aubrey,  that  Miss 
St.  Clair  consented  to  become  the  wife  of  a  man,  who,  to  this 
hour,  loves  her  with  all  the  passionate  ardor  with  which  she 
had  first  inspired  him.  And  richly  she  deserves  his  love,  for 
she  does,  indeed,  dpat  upon  him ;  she  studies,  or  rather,  per- 
haps, anticipates  his  every  wish  ;  in  short,  had  the  whole  sex 
been  searched  for  one  calculated  to  make  happy  the  morbid- 
ly fastidious  Aubrey,  the  choice  must  surely  have  fallen  on 
Miss  St.  Clair ;  a  woman  whose  temper,  whose  tastes,  and 
whose  manners  were  at  once  in  delicate  and  harmonizing 
unison  and  contrast  with  his  own.  She  has  hitherto  brought 
him  but  two  children— and  those  very  beautiful  children,  too 
—a  boy  between  four  and  five  years  old,  and  a  girl  about  two 
years  old.  If  I  were  to  hint  my  own  impressions  I  should 

say  there  was  a  probability but  be  that  as  it  may,  'tis  an 

aftair  we  have  nothing  to  do  with  at  present. 

Of  Catherine  Aubrey  you  had  a  momentary  moonlight 
glimpse,  at  a  former  period  of  this  history  ;  *  and  you  have 
seen  her  this  evening  under  other,  and  perhaps  'not  less 
interesting  circumstances.  Now,  where  have  you  beheld  a 
more  exquisite  specimen  of  budding  womanhood  ?— but  I  feel 
that  I  shall  get  extravagant  if  I  begin  to  dwell  upon  her 

*  See  ante,  p.  95. 


TEN  THOUSAND 'A-YEAR.  175 

charms.  You  have  seen  her— judge  for  yourself ;  but  you  do 
not  know  her  as  I  do ;  and  I  shall  tell  you  that  her  personal 
beauty  is  but  a  faint  emblem  of  the  beauties  of  her  mind 
and  character.  She  is  Aubrey's  youngest— now  his  only 
sister ;  and  he  cherishes  her  with  the  tenderest  and 
fondest  regard.  Neither  he,  nor  his  mother — with  both 
of  whom  she  spends  her  time  alternately— can  bear  to  part 
with  her  for  ever  so  short  an  interval.  She  is  the  gay,  romp- 
ing playmate  of  the  little  Aubreys;  the  demure  secretary 
and  treasurer  of  her  mother.  I  say  demure,  for  there  is  a  sly 
humor  and  archness  in  Kate's  composition,  which  nickers 
about  even  her  gravest  moods.  She  is  calculated  equally 
for  the  seclusion  of  Yatton  and  the  splendid  atmosphere  of 
Almack's ;  but  for  the  latter  she  seems  at  present  to  have 
little  inclination.  Kate  is  a  girl  of  decided  character,  of 
strong  sense,  of  high  principle  ;  all  of  which  are  irradiated, 
not  overborne,  by  her  sparkling  vivacity  of  temperament. 
She  has  real  talent ;  and  her  mind  has  been  trained,  and  her 
tastes  directed,  with  affectionate  skill  and  vigilance  by  her 
gitted  brother.  She  has  many  accomplishments  ;  but  the 
only  one  I  shall  choose  here  to  name  is— music.  She  was  one 
to  sing  and  play  before  a  man  of  the  most  fastidious  taste 
and  genius !  I  defy  any  man  to  hear  the  rich  tones  of  Miss 
Aubrey's  voice  without  feeling  his  heart  moved.  Music  is 
with  her  a  matter  not  of  art  but  of  feeling— of  passionate 
f eeling ;  but  hark !— hush !— surely— yes,  that'is  Miss  Aubrey's 
voice— yes,  that  is  her  clear  and  brilliant  touch  ;  the  ladies 
have  ascended  to  the  drawing-room,  and  we  must  presently 
follow  them.  How  time  has  passed!  I  had  a  great  deal 
more  to  tell  you  about  the  family,  but  we  must  take  some 
other  opportunity. 

Yes,  it  is  Miss  Aubrey,  playing  on  the  new  and  superb 
piano  given  by  her  brother  last  week  to  Mrs.  Aubrey.  Do 
you  see  with  what  a  careless  grace  and  ease  she  is  giving  a 
very  sweet  but  difficult  composition  of  Haydn  ?  The  lady 
who  is  standing  by  her  to  turn  over  her  music,  is  the  cele- 
brated Countess  of  Lydsdale.  She  is  still  young  and  beauti- 
ful ;  but  beside  Miss  Aubrey  she  presents  a  some  what  painful 
contrast !  'Tis  all  the  difference  between  an  artificial  and  a 
natural  flower.  Poor  Lady  Lydsdale !  you  are  not  happy 
with  all  your  fashion  and  splendor;  the  glitter  of  your 
diamonds  cannot  compensate  for  the  loss  of  the  sparkling 
spirits  of  a  younger  day ;  they  pale  their  ineffectual  fires  be- 
side the  fresh  and  joyous  spirit  of  Catharine  Aubrey !  You 
sigh— 

"  Now,  I'll  sing  you  quite  a  new  thing,"  said  Miss  Aubrey, 
starting  up,  and  turning  over  her  portfolio  till  she  came  to  a 
sheet  01  paper,  on  which  were  some  verses  in  her  own  hand- 
writing :  "  The  words  were  written  by  my  brother,  and  I 
have  found  an  old  air  that  exactly  suits  them  ! "  Here  her 
fingers,  wandering  lightly  and  softly  over  the  keys,  gave 


176  TEN  THOUSAND  A-YEAIi. 

forth  a  beautiful  symphony  hi  the  minor ;  after  which,  witfc 
a  rich  and  soft  voice,  she  sung  the  following  :— 

PEACE. 

I. 

WTiere,  O  where 

Hath  gentle  PEACE  found  rest  ? 
Builds  she  in  bower  of  lady  fair  ? — 
But  LOVE — he  hath  possession  there; 

Not  long  is  she  the  guest. 

II. 

Sits  she  crown' d 

Beneatli  a  pictured  dome  ? 
But  there  AMBITION  keeps  his  ground 
And  Fear  and  Envy  skulk  around; 

This  cannot  be  her  home  ! 

III. 

Will  she  hide 

In  scholar' s  pensive  cell  ? 
But  he  already  hath  his  bride  : 
Him  MELANCHOLY  sits  beside — 

With  her  she  may  not  dwell ! 

IV. 

"Now  and  then, 

Peace,  wandering,  lays  her  head 
On  regal  couch,  in  captive's  den — 
But  nowhere  finds  she  rest  with  men, 

Or  only  with  the  dead  ! 

To  these  words,  trembling  on  the  beautiful  lips  of  Miss 
Aubrey,  was  listening  an  unperceived  auditor,  with  eyes 
devouring  her  every  feature,  and  ears  absorbing  every  tone 
of  her  thrilling  voice.  It  was  young  Delamere,  who  had. 
only  a  moment  or  two  before  Miss  Aubrey  had  commenced 
singing  the  above  lines,  alighted  from  his  father's  carriage, 
which  was  then  waiting  at  the  door  to  carry  off  Lord  De  la 
Zouch  to  the  House  of  Lords.  Arrested  by  the  rich  voice  of 
the  singer,  he  stopped  short  before  he  had  entered  the  draw- 
ing-room in  which,  she  sat,  and,  stepping  to  a  corner  where 
he  was  hid  from  view,  though  he  could  distinctly  see  Miss 
Aubrey,  there  he  remained  as  if  rooted  to  the  spot.  He,  too, 
had  a  oul  for  music ;  and  the  exquisite  manner  in  which 
Miss  Aubrey  gave  the  last  verse,  called  up  before  his  excited 
fancy  the  vivid  image  of  a  dove  fluttering  with  agitated  un- 
certainty over  the  sea  of  human  life,  even  like  the  dove  over 
the  waters  enveloping  the  earth  in  olden  time.  The  mourn- 
ful minor  into  which  she  threw  the  last  line,  excited  a  heart 
susceptible  of  the  liveliest  emotions  to  a  degree  which  it 
required  some  effort  to  control,  and  almost  a  fear  to  relieve. 
When  Miss  Aubrey  had  quitted  the  piano,  Mrs.  Aubrey  fol* 


TEN  THOUSAND  A-TEAE.  177 

lowed  and  gave  a  very  delicate  sonata  from  Haydn.  Then 
sat  dovn  Lady  Lydsdale,  and  dashed  off,  in  an  exceeedingly 
brillant  style,  a  scena  from  the  new  opera,  which  quickly 
reduced  tfie  excited  feelings  of  Delamere  to  a  pitch  admitting 
of  his  presenting  himself.  While  this  lowering  process  was 
going  on,  Delamere  took  down  a  little  volume  from  a  taste- 
ful little  cabinet  of  books  immediately  behind  him,  and 
which  proved  to  be  a  volume  of  the  Faery  Queen.  He  found 
many  pencil-marks,  evidently  made  by  a  light  female  hand ; 
and  turning  to  the  fly-leaf,  beheld,  in  a  small  elegant  hand- 
writing, the  name  of  "  Catharine  Aubrey?  His  heart  flutter- 
ed ;  he  turned  towards  the  piano,  and  beheld  the  graceful 
figure  of  Miss  Aubrey  standing  beside  Lady  Lydsdale,  in  an 
attitude  of  delighted  earnestness— for  her  ladyship  was  un- 
doubtedly a  very  brilliant  performer— totally  unconscipus  of 
the  admiring  eye  that  was  fixed  upon  her.  After  gazing  at 
her  for  some  moments,  he  gently  pressed  the  autograph  to 
his  lips ;  and  solemnly  vowed  \yithin  himself,  in  me  most 
deliberate  manner  possible,  that  if  he  could  not  marry  Catha- 
rine Aubrey,  he  would  never  marry  anybody;  he  would, 
moreover,  quit  England  forever ;  and  deposit  a  broken  heart 
in  foreign  grave— and  so  forth.  Thus  calmly  resolved— or 
rather  to  such  a  resolution  did  his  thoughts  tend— that  sedate 
person,  the  Honorable  Geoff ry  Lovel  Delamere.  lie  was  a 
high-spirited,  frank-hearted  fellow ;  and,  like  a  good-natured 
fool,  whom  bitter  knowledge  of  the  world  has  not  cooled 
down  into  contempt  for  a  very  considerable  portion  of  it, 
trusted  and  -loved  almost  every  one  whom  he  saw.  At  that 
moment  there  was  only  one  person  in  the  whole  world  that 
he  hated,  viz.  the  miserable  individual— if  any  such  there 
were — who  might  have  happened  to  forestall  him  in  the  af- 
fections of  Miss  Aubrey.  The  bare  idea  made  his  breath 
come  and  go  quickly,  and  his  cheek  flush.  Why,  he  felt  that 
he  had  a  sort  of  right  to  Miss  Aubrey's  heart ;  for  had  they 
not  been  born,  and  had  they  not  lived  almost  all  their  lives, 
within  a  feAv  miles  of  each  other  ?  Had  they  not  often  played 
together? — were  not  their  family  estates  almost  contiguous? 
— Delamere  advanced  into  the  room,  assuming  as  unconcern- 
ed an  air  as  he  could  :  but  he  felt  not  a  little  tried  when  Miss 
Aubrey,  on  seeing  him,  gaily  and  frankly  extended  her  hand 
to  him,  supposing  him  to  have  only  the  moment  before 
entered  the  house.  Poor  Delamere' s  hand  slightly  quivered 
as  he  felt  it  clasping  the  soft  lilied  fingers  of  her  whom  he  had 
thus  resolved  to  make  his  wife :  what  would  he  not  have 
given  to  have  carried  them  to  his  lips !  Now,  if  I  were  to  say 
that  in  the  course  of  that  evening,  Miss  Aubrey  did  not  form 
a  kind— of  a  sort— of  a  faint — notion  of  the  possible  state  of 
matters  with  young  Delamere,  I  should  not  be  treating  the 
reader  with  that  eminent  degree  of  candor  for  which  I  think 
he,  or  she,  is  at  present  disposed  to  give  me  credit.  But  Kate 
was  deeply  skilled  in  human  nature,  and  settled  the  matter 


178  TEN  THOUSAND  A-YEAE. 

by  one  very  just  reflection,  viz.  that  Delamere  was,  :'n  con. 
templation  of  law,  a  mere  infant— i.e.  he  wanted  yet  several 
weeks  of  twenty-one !  and,  therefore,  that  it  was  not  likely 
that,  etc.  etc.  etc.  And,  besides— pooh !— pooh  !—  tis  a  mere 
boy,  at  College— how  ridiculous !— So  she  gave  iierself  no 
trouble  about  the  affair ;  exhibited  no  symptoms  of  caution 
or  coyness,  but  conducted  herself  just  as  if  he  Juid  not  been 
present. 

He  was  a  handsome  young  fellow,  too ! 

During  the  evening,  Mr.  Delamere  took  an  opportunity  of 
asking  Miss  Aubrey  who  wrote  the  verses  which  he  pointed 
to,  as  they  lay  on  the  piano.  The  handwriting,  she  said,  was 
hers,  but  the  verses  were  composed  by  her  brother.  He 
asked  for  the  copy,  with  a  slight  trepidation.  She  readily 
gave  it  to  him— he  receiving  it  with  (as  he  supposed)  a 
mighty  unconcerned  air.  He  read  it  over  that  night,  before 
getting  into  bed,  at  least  six  times ;  and  it  was  the  very  first 
thing  he  looked  at  on  getting  out  of  bed  in  the  morning.  Now 
Miss  Aubrey  certainly  wrote  an  elegant  hand— but  as  for 
character,  of  course  it  had  none-  He  could  scarce  have  dis- 
tinguished it  from  the  handwriting  of  any  of  his  cousins  or 
friends;— How  should  he?  All  women  are  taught  the  same 
hard,  angular,  uniform  hand — but  good,  bad,  or  indifferent, 
this  was  Kate  Aubrey 's  handwriting— and  her  pretty  hand 
had  rested  on  the  paper  while  writing— that  was  enough.  He 
resolved  to  turn  the  verses  into  every  kind  of  Greek  and 
Latin  metre  he  knew  of — 

In  short,  that  here  was  a  "  course  of  true  love "  opened, 
seems  pretty  evident ;  but  whether  it  will  "  run  smooth  "  is 
another  matter. 

Their  guests  having  at  length  departed,  Mr.  Aubrey,  his 
wife  and  sister,  soon  afterwards  rose  to  retire.  He  went, 
very  sleepy,  straight  to  his  dressing-room ;  they  to  the  nur- 
sery—(a  constant  and  laudable  custom  with  them)— to  see 
how  the  children  were  going  on,  as  far  as  they  could  learn, 
from  their  drowsy  attendants.  Little  Aubrey  would  have 
reminded  you  of  one  of  the  exquisite  sketches  of  children's 
heads  by  Reynolds  or  Lawrence,  as  he  lay  breathing  imper- 
ceptibly, with  his  rich  flowing  hair  spread  upon  the  pillow, 
in  which  his  face  was  partly  hid,  and  his  arms  stretched 
out.  Mrs.  Aubrey  put  her  finger  into  one  of  his  hands,  which 
was  half  open,  and  which  closed  as  it  were  instinctively  upon 
it  with  a  gentle  pressure.  "  Look,  Kate,"  softly  whispered 
Mrs.  Aubrey.  Miss  Aubrey  leaned  forward  and  kissed  his 
little  cheek  with  an  ardor  that  almost  awoke  him.  After  a 
glance  at  a  tiny  head  partly  visible  above  the  clothes,  in  an 
adjoining  bed,  and  looking  like  a  rose-bud  almost  entirely 
hid  amongst  the  leaves,  they  withdrew. 

The  little  loves !— how  one's  heart  thrills  with  looking  at 
them  !  said  Miss  Aubrey,  as  they  descended.  "  Kate ! " 
whispered  Mrs.  Aubrey,  with  an  arch  smile,  as  they  stood  at 


TEN  THOUSAND  A-TEAE.  179 

their  lespective  chamber  doors,  which  adjoined.  "  Mr. 
Delameie  is  improved— is  not  he  ?— Ah,  Kate  !  Kate !— I  un- 
derstand I " 

"  Agnes,  how  can  you  ?  "—hastily  answered  Miss  Aubrey, 
with  cheeks  suddenly  crimsoned.  "I  never  heard  such 
nonsense." 

"  Night,  night,  Kate !  think  over  it !  "  said  Mrs.  Aubrey, 
and  kissing  her  beautiful  sister-in-law,  the  next  moment  the 
blooming  wife  had  entered  her  bed-room.  Miss  Aubrey  slip- 
ped into  her  dressing-room,  where  Harriet,  her  maid,  was 
sitting  asleep  before  the  fire.  Her  lovely  mistress  did  not  for 
a  few  minutes  awake  her ;  but  placing  her  candlestick  on  the 
toilet-table,  stood  in  a  musing-  attitude. 

"  It's  so  perfectly  ridiculous"  at  length  she  said  aloud,  and 
up  started  her  maid.  Within  a  quarter  of  an  hour  Miss  Au- 
brey was  in  bed,  but  by  no  means  asleep. 

The  next  morning,  about  eleven  o'clock,  Mr.  Aubrey  was 
seated  in  the  library,  in  momentary  expectation  of  his  let- 
ters ;  and  a  few  moments  before  tlie  postman's  rat-tat  was 
heard,  Mrs.  and  Miss  Aubrey  made  their  appearance,  as  was 
their  wont,  in  expectation  ot  anything  that  might  have  been 
upon  the  cover,  in  addition  to  the  address — 

"  CHARLES  AUBREY,  ESQ.,  M.  P.,"  etc.  etc.  etc., 

the  words,  letters,  or  figures,  "Mrs.  Aubrey,"  or  "  Miss  Au- 
brey," in  the  corner.  In  addition  to  this,  'twas  not  an  un- 
pleasant thing  to  skim  over  the  contents  of  his  letters !  as 
one  by  one  he  opened  them  ;  and  laid  them  aside  ;  for  both 
these  fair  creatures  were  daughters  of  Eve,  and  inherited  a 
little  of  her  curiosity.  Mr.  Aubrey  was  always  somewhat 
nervous  and  fidgety  on  such  occasions,  and  wished  them 
gone ;  but  they  only  laughed  at  him,  so  he  was  fain  to  put  up 
with  them.  On  this  morning  there  were  more  than  Mr. 
Aubrey's  usual  number  of  letters ;  and  in  casting  her  eye 
over  them,  Mrs.  Aubrey  suddenly  took  up  one  that  challenged 
attention  ;  is  bore  a  black  seal,  had  a  deep  black  bordering, 
and  had  the  frank  of  Lord  Alkmond,  at  whose  house  in  Shrop- 
shire they  had  for  months  been  engaged  to  spend  the  ensu- 
ing Christmas,  and  were  intending  to  set  off  on  their  visit 
the  very  next  day.  The  ominous  missive  was  soon  torn  open  : 
it  was  from  Lord  Alkmond  himself,  who  in  a  few  hurried 
lines  announced  the  sudden  death  of  his  brother ;  so  that 
there  was  an  end  of  their  visit  to  the  Priory. 

"Well!"  exclaimed  Mr.  Aubrey  calmly,  rising  after  a 
pause,  and  standing  with  his  back  to  the  fire,  in  a  musing 
posture. 

"  Has  he  left  any  family,  Charles?"  inquired  Mrs.  Aubrey 
with  a  sigh,  her  eyes  still  fixed  on  the  letter. 

"I — I  really  don't  know — poor  fellow!  We  lose  a  vote  for 
Shellington— we  shall,  to  a  certainty,"  he  added,  with  an  air 
of  chagrin  visibly  stealing  over  his  features. 


180  TEN  THOUSAND  A-TEAB. 

"  How  politics  harden  the  heart,  Charles !  Just  at  this  mo. 
ment  to  be "  quoth  Mrs.  Aubrey. 

"  It  is  too  bad,  Agnes,  I  own— but  you  see,"  said  Mr.  Au- 
brey affectionately;  but  added  suddenly,  "stay,  I  don't 
know  either,  for  tnere's  the  Grassingham  interest  come  into 
the  field  since  the  last " 

"  Charles,  I  do  really  almost  think,"  exclaimed  Mrs.  Au- 
brey with  sudden  emotion,  stepping  to  his  side,  and  throw- 
ing her  arms  round  him  affectionately,  "  that  if  I  were  to 
die,  I  should  be  forgotten  in  a  fortnight,  if  the  House  were 
sitting " 

"  How  can  you  say  such  things,  my  love  ? "  inquired  Au- 
brey, kissing  her  forehead. 

"  When  Agnes  was  born,  you  know,"  she  murmured  inar- 
ticulately. Her  husband  folded  her  tenderly  in  his  arms  in 
silence.  On  the  occasion  she  alluded  to,  he  had  nearly  lost 
her  ;  and  they  both  had  reason  to  expect  that  another  similar 
season  of  peril  was  not  very  distant. 

"  Now,  Charles,  you  cadt  escape,"  said  Miss  Aubrey,  pres- 
ently assuming  a  cheerful  tone :  "  now  for  dear  old  Yat- 
ton ! ," 

"  Yes,  Yatton !  Positively  you  must ! "  added  Mrs.  Aubrey, 
smiling  through  her  tears. 

"  What !  Go  to  Yatton  ?  "  said  Mr.  Aubrey,  shaking  his 
head  and  smiling.  "  Nonsense !  Why  we  must  set  off  to- 
morrow :  they've  had  no  warning ! " 

"  What  warning  does  mamma  require,  Charles  ?  "  inquired 
his  sister  eagerly.  "  Isn't  the  dear  old  place  always  in  apple 
pie  order  ?  " 

"How  you  love  the  'dear  old  place,'  Kate!"  exclaimed 
Aubrey,  in  such  an  affectionate  tone  as  brought  his  sister  in 
an  instant  to  his  side,  to  urge  on  her  suit ;  and  there  stood 
the  lord  of  Yatton  embraced  by  these  two  beautiful  women, 
his  own  heart  (inter  nos)  seconding  every  word  they  uttered. 

"  How  my  mother  would  stare !  '  said  he  at  length  irreso- 
lutely, looking  from  one  to  the  other,  arid  smiling  at  their 
eagerness. 

What  a  bustle  everything  will  be  in !  "  exclaimed  Kate. 
"I  fancy  I'm  there  already!  The  great  blazing  fires— the 
holly  and  mistletoe.  We  must  all  go,  Charles— children  and 
allP' 

"  Why  really,  I  hardly  know— 

"  Oh !  I've  settled  it  all,"  quoth  Kate,  seeing  that  she  had 
gained  her  point,  and  resolved  to"  press  her  advantage, "  and 
what's  more,  we've  no  time  to  lose ;  this  is  Tuesday— Christ- 
mas-day is  Saturday— we  must  of  course  stop  a  night  on  the 
way ;  but  hadn't  we  better  have  Griffiths  in,  to  arrange  all  ?  " 
Aubrey  rang  the  bell. 

"  Request  Mr.  Griffiths  to  come  to  me,"  said  he  to  the  ser- 
vant wno  answered  the  summons. 

Within  a  very  few  minutes  that  respectable  functionary 


TEN  THOUSAND  A-YEAU.  181 

had  made  his  appearance  and  received  his  instructions.  The 
march  to  Shropshire  was  countermanded  —  and  hey!  for 
Yatton  !— for  which  they  were  to  start  the  next  day  about 
noon.  Mr.  Griffiths'  first  step  was  to  pack  off  Sam,  Mr.  Au- 
brey's groom,  by  the  Tally-ho,  the  first  coach  to  York,  start- 
ing iit  two  o'clpck  that  very  day,  with  letters  announcing  the 
immediate  arrival  of  the  family.  These  orders  were  received 
by  Sam  (who  had  been  born  and  bred  at  Yatton,)  while  he 
\vas  bestowing,  with  vehemently  sibilation,  his  customary 
civilities  on  a  favorite  mare  of  his  master's.  Down  dropped 
his  currycomb ;  he  jumped  into  the  air ;  snapped  his  fingers  ; 
then  he  threw  his  arms  round  Jenny,  and  tickled  her  under 
the  chin.  "  Dang  it,"  said  he,  as  he  threw  her  another  feed 
of  oats,  "  I  wish  thee  were  going  wi'  me— dang'd  if  I  don't !  " 
Then  he  hastily  made  himself  '  a  bit  tidy ; '  presented  himself 
very  respectfully  before  Mr.  Griffiths,  to  receive  the  where- 
withal to  pay  his  fare ;  and  having  obtained  it,  off  he  scamp- 
ered to  the  Bull  and  Mouth,  as  if  it  had  been  a  neck-and-neck 
race  between  him  and  all  London,  which  should  get  down  to 
Yorkshire  first.  A  little  after  one  o'clock,  his  packet  of  let- 
ters was  delivered  to  him ;  and  within  another  hour  Sam  was 
to  be  seen  (quite  comfortable,  with  a  draught  of  spiced  ale 
given  him  by  the  cook,  to  make  his  hasty  dinner  "  sit  well " ) 
on  the  top  of  the  Tally-ho,  rattling  rapidly  along  the  great 
north  road. 

"  Come,  Kate,"  said  Mrs.  Aubrey,  entering  Miss  Aubrey's 
room,  where  she  was  giving  directions  to  her  maid,  "  I've  or- 
dered the  carriage  to  be  at  the  door  as  soon  as  it  can  be  got 
ready ;  we  must  go  off  to  Coutts'— see ! '  She  held  in  her 
hand  two  slips  of  paper,  one  of  which  she  gave  Miss  Aubrey. 
'Twas  a  check  for  one  hundred  pounds— her  brother's  usual 
Christmas  box—"  and  then  we've  a  quantity  of  little  matters 
to  buy  this  afternoon.  Come,  Kate,  quick !  quick ! " 

Now,  poor  Kate  had  nearly  spent  all  her  money,  which  cir- 
cumstance, connected  with  another  that  I  shall  shortly  men- 
tion, had  given  her  not  a  little  concern.  At  her  earnest  re- 
quest, her  brother  had,  about  a  year  before,  built  her  a  nice 
little  school,  capable  of  containing  some  eighteen  or  twenty 
girls,  on  a  slip  of  land  between  the  vicarage  and  the  park 
i  wall  of  Yatton,  and  old  Mrs.  Aubrey  and  her  daughter  found 
a  resident  school-mistress,  and,  in  fact,  supported  the  little 
establishment,  which,  at  the  time  I  am  speaking  of,  contain- 
ed some  seventeen  or  eighteen  of  the  villagers'  younger  chil- 
dren. Miss  Aubrey  took  a  prodigious  interest  in  this  little 
school,  scarce  a  day  passing  without  her  visiting  it  when 
she  was  at  Yatton ;  and  what  Kate  wanted,  was  the  luxury 
of  giving  a  Christmas  present  to  both  mistress  and  scholars. 
That,  however,  she  would  have  had  some  difficulty  in  effect- 
ing but  for  this  her  brother's  timely  present,  which  had  quite 
set  her  heart  at  ease.  On  their  return,  the  carriage  was 
crowded  with  the  things  they  had  been  purchasing— articles 


182  TEN  THOUSAND  A-YEAK. 

of  clothing  for  the  feebler  old  villagers  ;  work-boxes,  samp- 
lers, books,  testaments,  prayer-books,  etc.  etc.  etc.,  for  the 
school ;  the  sight  of  which  I  can  assure  the  raider,  made 
Kate  far  happier  than  if  they  had  been  the  costliest  articles 
of  dress  and  jewelry. 

The  next  day  was  a  very  pleasant  one  for  travelling — 
"  frosty,  but  kindly."  About  one  o'clock  there  might  have 
been  seen  standing  before  the  door  the  roomy  yellow  family 
carriage,  with  four  post-horses,  all  in  travelling  trim.  In  the 
rumble  sat  Mr.  Aubrey's  valet  and  Mrs.  Aubrey's  maid- 
Miss  Aubrey's,  and  one  of  the  nursery  maids,  going  down  by 
the  coach  which  had  carried  Sam— the  Tally-ho.  The  coach- 
box was  piled  up  with  that  sort  of  luggage  which,  by  its 
lightness  and  bulk,  denotes  lady  travelling:  inside  were 
Mrs.  and  Miss  Aubrey,  muffled  in  furs,  shawls,  and  pelisses; 
a  nursery  maid  with  little  Master  and  Miss  Aubrey,  equally 
well  protected  from  the  cold ;  and  the  vacant  seat  awaited 
Mr.  Aubrey,  who  at  length  made  his  appearance,  having 
been  engaged  till  the  latest  moment  in  giving  and  repeating 
specific  instructions  concerning  the  forwarding  of  his  letters 
and  papers.  As  soon  as  he  had  taken  his  place,  and  all  had 
been  snugly  disposed  within,  the  steps  were  doubled  up,  the 
door  was  closed,  the  windows  were  drawn  up— crack  !  crack ! 
went  the  whips  of  the  two  postilions,  and  away  rolled  the 
carriage  over  the  dry  hard  pavement. 

"  Now  that's  what  I  calls  doing  it  uncommon  comfortable," 
said  a  pot>boy  to  one  of  the  footmen  at  an  adjoining  house, 
where  he  was  delivering  the  porter  for  the  servants'  dinner  ; 
"  how  werry  nice  and  snug  them  two  looks  in  the  rumble  be- 
hind ! " 

"  We  goes  to-morrow,"  carelessly  replied  the  gentleman  he 
was  addressing. 

"  It's  a  fine  thing  to  be  gentlefolk,"  said  the  boy,  taking  up 
his  pot-board. 

"  Y a-as,"  drawled  the  footman,  twitching  up  his  shirt  col- 
lar. 

On  drawing  up  to  the  posting-house,  which  was  within 
about  forty  miles  from  Yatton,  the  Aubreys  found  a  carriage 
and  four  just  ready  to  start,  after  changing  horses ;  and 
whose  should  this  prove  to  be  but  Lord  De  la  Zouch's,  con- 
taining himself,  his  lady,  and  his  son,  Mr.  Delamere.  His 
lordship  and  son  both  alighted  on  accidentally  discovering 
who  had  overtaken  them ;  and  commg  up  to  Mr.  Aubrey's 
carriage  windows,  exchanged  surprised  and  cordial  greetings 
with  its  occupants— whom  Lord  De  la  Zouch  imagined  to 
have  been  by  this  time  on  their  way  to  Shropshire.  Mr.  De- 
lamere manifested  a  surprising  eagerness  about  the  welfare 
of  little  Agnes  Aubrey,  who  happened  to  be  lying  fast 
asleep  in  Miss  Aubrey's  lap ;  but  the  evening  was  fast  advanc- 
ing, and  both  the  travelling  parties  had  yet  before  them  a 
considerable  portion  of  their  journey.  After  a  hasty  promise 


TEN  THOUSAND  A-TEAR.  183 

on  the  part  of  each  to  dine  with  the  other  before  returning  to 
town  for  the  season— a  promise  which  Mr.  Delamere  at  all 
events  resolved  thould  not  be  lost  sight  of— they  parted. 
'Twas  eight  o'clock  before  Mr.  Aubrey's  eye,  which  had  been 
for  some  time  on  the  lookout,  caught  sight  of  Yatton  woods ; 
and  when  it  did,  his  heart  yearned  towards  them.  The  moon 
shone  brightly  and  cheerily,  and  it  was  pleasant  to  listen  to 
the  quickening  clattering  tramp  of  the  horses  upon  the  dry, 
hard  highway,  as  the  travellers  rapidly  neared  a  spot  endear- 
ed to  them  by  every  early  and  tender  association.  When  they 
had  got  within  half  a  mile  of  the  village,  they  overtook  the 
vicar,  who  had  mounted  his  nag,  and  been  out  on  the  road  to 
meet  the  expected  comers,  for  an  hour  before.  Aubrey 
roused  Mrs.  Aubrey  from  her  nap,  to  point  out  Dr.  Tatham, 
who  by  that  time  was  cantering  along  beside  the  open  win- 
dow. 'Twas  refreshing  to  see  the  cheerful  old  man— who 
looked  as  ruddy  and  hearty  as  ever. 

"  God  bless  you  all !  All  well?"  he  exclaimed,  riding  close 
to  the  window. 

"  Yes ;  but  how  is  my  mother? "  inquired  Aubrey. 

"  High  spirits— high  spirits !  Was  with  her  this  after- 
noon !  Have  not  seen  her  better  for  years !  So  surprised ! 
Ah  !  here's  an  old  friend— Hector ! ' 

"  Bow-wow-wow-wow  !    Bow— Bow-wow !" 

"  Papa !  papa !  "  exclaimed  the  voice  of  little  Charles, 

out  of  the  win- 
is  come  to  see 


Mr.  Aubrey  lifted  him  up  as  he  desired,  and  a  huge  black- 
and-white  Newfoundland  dog  almost  leaped  up  to  the  win- 
dow at  sight  of  him  clapping  his  little  hands,  as  if  in  eager 
recognition,  and  then  scampered  and  bounded  about  in  all 
directions,  barking  most  boisterously,  to  the  infinite  de- 
light of  little  Aubrey.  This  messenger  had  been  sent  on 
by  Sam,  the  groom,  who  had  been  on  the  look-out  for  the 
travellers  for  some  time  ;  and  the  moment  he  caught  sight  of 
the  carriage,  pelted  down  the  village,  through  the  park,  at 
top  speed,  up  to  the  Hall,  there  to  communicate  the  good 
news  of  their  safe  arrival.  The  travellers  thought  that  the 
village  had  never  looked  so  pretty  and  picturesque  before. 
The  sound  of  the  carriage  dashing  through  it,  called  all  the 
cottagers  to  their  doors,  where  they  stood  bowing  and 
curtseying.  It  soon  reached  the  park-gates,  which  were 
thrown  wide  open  in  readiness  for  its  entrance.  As  they 
passed  the  church,  they  heard  its  little  bells  ringing  a  merry 
peal  to  welcome  their  arrival ;  its  faint  chimes  went  to  their 
very  hearts. 

"  My  darling  Agnes,  here  we  are  again  in  the  old  place," 
said  Mr.  Aubrey  in  a  joyous  tone,  affectionately  kissing  Mrs. 
Aubrey  and  his  sister,  as,  after  having  wound  their  way  up 
the  park  at  almost  a  gallop,  they  heard  themselves  rattling 


184  TEN  THOUSAND  A-YEAB. 

over  the  stone  pavement  immediately  under  the  old  turreted 
gateway.  On  approaching  it,  they  saw  lights  glancing 
about  in  the  hall  windows ;  and  before  they  had  drawn  up, 
the  great  door  was  thrown  open,  and  several  servants  (one 
or  two  of  them  grayheaded)  made  their  appearance,  eager  to 
release  the  travellers  from  their  long  confinement.  A  great 
wood  fire  was  crackling  and  blazing  in  the  ample  fireplace 
in  the  hall  opposite  the  door,  casting  a  right  pleasant  and 
cheerful  light  over  the  various  antique  objects  ranged  around 
the  walls ;  but  the  object  on  which  Mr.  Aubrey's  eye 
instantly  settled  was  the  venerable  figure  of  his  mother, 
standing  beside  the  fireplace  with  one  or  two  female 
attendants.  The  moment  that  the  carriage  door  was 
opened,  he  stepped  quickly  out,  (nearly  tumbling,  by  the 
way,  Over  Hector,  who  appeared  to  think  that  the  carriage- 
door  had  been  opened  only  to  enable  him  to  jump  into  it, 
which  he  prepared  to  do.) 

"  God  bless  you,  madam !"  said  he  tenderly,  as  he  received 
his  mother's  fervent  but  silent  greeting,  and  imagined  that 
the  arms  folded  round  him  were  somewhat  feebler  than 
when  he  had  last  felt  them  embracing  him.  With  similar 
affection  was  the  good  old  lady  received  by  her  daughter 
and  daughter-in-law. 

"Where  is  my  pony,  grandmamma?"  quoth  little  Au- 
brey, running  up  to  her,  (he  had  been  kept  quiet  for  the 
last  eighty  miles  or  so,  by  the  mention  of  the  aforesaid 
pony,  which  had  been  sent  to  the  Hall  as  a  present  to  him 
some  weeks  before.)  "  Where  is  it  ?  I  want  to  see  my  little 
pony  directly !  Mamma  says  you  have  got  a  little  pony  for 
me  with  a  long  tail ;  I  must  see  it  before  I  go  to  bed  ;  I  must 
indeed — is  it  in  the  stable  ?  " 

"  You  shall  see  it  in  the  morning,  my  darling— the  very 
first  thing,"  said  Mrs.  Aubrey,  fervently  kissing  her  beauti- 
ful little  grandson,  while  tears  of  joy  and  pride  ran  down 
her  cheek.  She  then  pressed  her  lips  on  the  delicate  but 
flushed  cheek  of  little  Agnes,  who  was  fast  asleep :  and  as 
soon  as  they  had  been  conducted  towards  their  nursery, 
Mrs.  Aubrey,  followed  by  her  children,  led  the  way  to  the 
dining-room— the  dear  delightful  old  dining-room,  in  which 
all  of  them  had  passed  so  many  happy  hours  of  their  lives. 
It  was  large  andlofty ;  and  two  antique  branch  silver  candle- 
sticks, standing  on  sconces  upon  each  side  of  a  strange  old 
straggling  carved  mantel-piece  of  inlaid  oak,  aided  by  the 
blaze  given  out  by  two  immense  logs  of  wood  burning 
beneath,  thoroughly  illuminated  it.  The  walls  were  oak- 
paneled,  containing  many  pictures,  several  of  them  of  great 
value  ;  and  the  floor  also  was  of  polished  oak,  over  the  cen- 
tre of  which,  however,  was  spread  a  thick  richly-colored 
turkey  carpet.  Opposite  the  door  was  a  large  mullioned 
bay-window,  then,  however,  concealed  behind  an  ample 
flowing  crimson  curtain.  On  the  further  side  of  the  fire- 


TEN  THOUSAND  A-YEAB.  185 

place  stctod  a  high-backed  and  roomy  arm-chair,  almost 
covered  with  Kate^s  embroidery,  and  in  which  Mrs.  Aubrey 
had  evidently,  as  usual,  been  sitting  till  the  moment  of  their 
arrival — for  on  a  small  ebony  table  beside  it  lay  her  spec- 
tacles, and  an  open  volume.  Nearly  fronting  the  fireplace 
was  a  recess,  in  which  stood  an  exquisitely  carved  black 
ebony  cabinet,  inlaid  with  white  and  red  ivory,  This,  Miss 
Aubrey  claimed  as  her  own,  and  had  appropriated  it  to  her 
own  purposes  ever  since  she  was  seven  years  old.  "  You 
dear  old  thing  !  "  said  she,  throwing  open  the  folding-doors 
— "  Everything  just  as  I  left  it !  Really,  dear  mamma,  I 
could  skip  about  the  room  for  joy !  I  wish  Charles  would 
never  leave  Yatton  again ! ' 

"  It's  rather  lonely,  my  love,  when  none  of  you  are  with 
me,"  said  Mrs.  Aubrey.  "  I  feel  getting  older " 

"Dearest  mamma,"  interrupted  Miss  Aubrey  quickly,  "7 
won't  leave  you  again !  I'm  quite  tired  of  town— I  am 
indeed ! " 

Though  fires  were  lit  in  their  several  dressing-rooms,  of 
which  they  were  more  than  once  reminded  by  their 
respective  attendants,  they  all  remained  seated  before  the 
fire  in  carriage  costume,  (except  that  Kate  had  thrown  aside 
her  bonnet,  her  half-uncurled  tresses  hanging  in  negligent 
profusion  over  her  thickly-furred  pelisse),  eagerly  conversing 
about  the  little  incidents  of  their  journey,  and  the  events 
which  had  transpired  at  Yatton  since  they  had  quitted  it. 
At  length,  however,  they  retired  to  perform  the  refreshing 
duties  of  the  dressing  room,  before  sitting  down  to  supper. 
Of  that  comfortable  meal,  within  twenty  minutes'  time  or 
so,  they  partook  with  hearty  relish.  What  mortal,  however 
delicate,  could  resist  the  fare  set  before  them — the  plump 
capon,  the  delicious  grilled  ham,  the  poached  eggs,  the 
floury  potatoes,  home-baked  bread,  wnite  aud  brown — 
custards,  mince-pies,  home-brewed  ale,  as  soft  as  milk,  as 
clear  as  amber— mulled  claret— and  so  forth  ?  The  travellers 
had  evidently  never  relished  anything  more,  to  the  infinite 
delight  of  old  Mrs.  Aubrey ;  who  observing,  soon  afterwards, 
irrepressible  symptoms  of  fatigue  and  drowsiness,  ordered 
them  all  off  to  bed — Kate  sleeping  in  the  sanie  chamber  in 
which  she  sat  when  the  reader  was  permitted  to  catch  a 
moonlight  glimpse  of  her,  as  already  more  than  once 
referred  to. 

They  did  not  make  their  appearance  the  next  morning  till 
after  nine  o'clock,  Mrs.  Aubrey  having  read  prayers  before 
the  assembled  servants,  as  usual,  nearly  an  hour  before— 
a  duty  her  son  always  performed  when  at  the  Hall — but  on 
this  occasion  he  had  overslept  himself.  He  found  his 
mother  in  the  breakfast-room,  where  she  was  soon  joined  by 
her  daughter  and  daughter-in-law,  all  of  them  being  in  high 
health  and  spirits.  Just  as  they  were  finishing  breakfast, 
little  Aubrey  burst  into  the  room  in  a  perfect  ecstasy— for 


186  TEN  THOUSAND  A-YEAE. 

old  Jones  had  taken  him  round  to  the  stables,  and  shown 
him  the  little  pony  which  had  been  bought  for  him  only  a 
few  months  before.  He  had  heard  it  neigh— had  seen  its 
long  tail— had  patted  its  neck— had  seen  it  eat— and  now  his 
vehement  prayer  was,  that  his  papa,  and  mamma,  and  Kate 
would  immediately  go  and  see  it,  and  take  his  little 
sister  also. 

Breakfast  over,  they  separated.  Old  Mrs.  Aubrey  went  to 
her  own  room  to  be  attended  by  her  housekeeper ;  the  other 
two  ladies  retired  to  their  rooms— Kate  principally  engaged 
in  arranging  her  presents  for  her  little  scholars:  and  Mr. 
Aubrey  repaired  to  his  library— as  delightful  an  old  snug- 
gery as  the  most  studious  recluse  could  desire— when  he 
was  presently  attended  by  his  bailiff.  He  found  everything 
was  going  on  as  lie  could  have  wished.  With  one  or  two  excep- 
tions, his  rents  were  paid  most  punctually;  the  farms  and  lands 
kept  in  capital  condition.  To  be  sure  an  incorrigible  old 
poacher  had  been  giving  his  people  a  little  trouble,  as  usual, 
and  was  committed  for  trial  at  the  Spring  Assizes ;  a  few 
trivial  trespasses  had  been  committed  in  search  of  fire-wood, 
and  other  small  matters ;  which,  after  having  been  detailed 
with  great  minuteness  by  his  zealous  and  vigilant  bailiff, 
were  dispatched  by  Mr.  Aubrey  with  a  "pooh,  pooh!"-- 
Then  there  was  Gregory,  who  held  the  smallest  farm  on  the 
estate,  at  its  southern  extremity — he  was  three  quarters' 
rent  in  arrear— but  he  had  a  sick  wife  and  seven  children — 
so  he  was  at  once  forgiven  all  that  was  due  on  the  ensuing 
quarter  day. — "  In  fact,"  said  Mr.  Aubrey,  "  don't  ask  him 
for  any  more  rent.  I'm  sure  the  poor  fellow  will  pay  when 
he's  able." 

Some  rents  were  to  be  raised  ;  others  lowered ;  and  some 
half  dozen  of  the  poorer  cottages  were  to  be  forthwith  put 
into  good  repair,  at  Mr.  Aubrey's  expense.  The  two  oxen 
had  been  sent,  on  the  preceding  afternoon,  from  the  home 
farm  to  the  butcher's,  to  be  distributed  on  Christmas  eve 
among  the  poorer  villagers,  according  to  orders  brought 
down  from  town  by  Sam,  the  day  before.  Thus  was  Mr. 
Aubrey  engaged  for  an  hour  or  two,  till  luncheon  time,  when 
good  Dr.  Tatham  made  his  welcome  appearance,  having  been 
engaged  most  of  the  morning  in  touching  up  an  old  Christ 
mas  sermon. 

He  had  been  vicar  of  Yatton  for  nearly  thirty  years,  hav- 
ing been  presented  to  it  by  the  late  Mr.  Aubrey,  with  whom 
he  had  been  intimate  at  college.  He  was  a  delightful  speci- 
men of  a  country  parson.  Cheerful,  unaffected,  and  good- 
natured,  there  was  a  dash  of  quaintness  or  roughness  about 
nis  manners,  that  reminded  you  of  the  crust  in  very  fine  old 
port.  He  had  been  a  widower,  and  childless,  for  fifteen  years. 
His  parish  had  been  ever  since  his  family,  whom  he  still 
watched  over  with  an  affectionate  vigilance.  He  was  re 
spected  and  beloved  by  all,  Almost  every  man,  woman,  and 


TEN  THOUSAND  A-YEAS.  187 

child  that  had  died  in  Yatton,  during  nearly  thirty  years, 
had  departed  with  the  sound  of  his  kind  and  solemn  voice 
in  their  ears.  He  claimed  a  sort  of  personal  acquaintance 
with  almost  all  the  gravestones  in  his  little  churchyard ;  and 
when  he  looked  at  them,  his  conscience  bore  him  witness, 
that  he  had  done  his  duty  by  the  dust  that  slept  underneath. 
He  was  at  the  bedside  of  a  sick  person  almost  as  soon  as  the 
doctor — no  matter  what  sort  of  weather,  or  at  what  hour  of 
the  day  or  night.  Methinks  I  see  him  now,  bustling  about 
the  village,  with  healthy  ruddy  cheek,  a  clear,  cheerful  eye, 
hair  white  as  snow ;  with  a  small  stout  figure,  clothed  in  a 
suit  of  somewhat  rusty  black,  (knee-breeches  and  gaiters  all 
round  the  year,)  and  with  a  small  shovel-hat.  No  one  lives 
in  the  vicarage  with  him  but  an  elderly  woman,  his  house- 
keeper, and  her  husband,  whose  chief  business  is  to  look 
after  the  doctor's  old  mare  and  the  little  garden  ;  in  which 
I  have  often  seen  him  and  his  master,  with  his  coat  off,  dig- 
ging for  hours  together.  He  rises  at  five  in  the  winter,  and 
four  in  the  summer,  being  occupied  till  breakfast  with  his 
studies  i  for  he  was  an  excellent  scholar,  and  has  not  for- 
gotten, in  the  zealous  discharge  of  his  sacred  duties,  the  pur- 
suits of  literature  and  philosophy,  in  which  he  gained  no 
inconsiderable  distinction  in  his  youth.  He  derives  a  moder- 
ate income  from  his  living ;  but  it  was  even  more  than 
sufficient  for  his  necessities.  Ever  since  Mr.  Aubrey's 
devotion  to  politics  has  carried  him  away  from  Yatton  for 
a  considerable  portion  of  each  year,  Dr.  Tatham  had  been 
the  right-hand  counsellor  of  old  Mrs.  Aubrey,  in  all  her  pious 
and  charitable  plans  and  purposes.  Every  new-year's  day, 
there  came  from  the  Hall  to  the  vicarage  six  dozen  of  fine 
old  port  wine — a  present  from  Mrs.  Aubrey  \  but  the  little 
doctor  (though  he  never  tells  her  so)  scarce  drinks  six  bottles 
of  them  in  a  year.  Two  dozen  of  them  go,  within  a  few  days' 
time,  to  a  poor  brother  parson  in  an  adjoining  parish,  who, 
with  his  wife  and  three  children — all  in  feeble  health— can 
hardly  keep  body  and  soul  together,  and  who,  but  for  this 
generous  brother  would  not  probably  taste  a  glass  of  wine 
throughout  the  year,  except  on  certain  occasions  when  the 
very  humblest  may  moisten  their  poor  lips  with  wine— I 
mean  the  SACRAMENT — the  sublime  and  solemn  festival 
given  by  One  who  doth  not  forget  the  poor  and  _  destitute, 
however  in  their  misery  they  may  sometimes  think  to  the 
contrary !— The  remainder  of  his  little  present  Dr.  Tatham 
distributes  in  small  quantities  amongst  such  of  his  parish- 
ioners as  may  require  it,  and  may  not  happen  to  have  come 
under  the  intimate  notice  of  Mrs.  Aubrey.  Dr.  Tatham  has 
known  Mr.  Aubrey  ever  since  he  was  about  five  years  old. 
'Twas  the  doctor  that  first  taught  him  Greek  and  Latin  ; 
and,  up  to  his  going  to  college,  gave  him  the  frequent  advan- 
tage 01  his  learned  experience.— But  surely  I  have  gone  into 
a  very  long  digression,  and  must  return. 


188  TEN  THOUSAND  A-YEAR. 

While  Miss  Aubrey,  accompanied  by  her  sister-in-law,  and 
followed  by  a  servant  carrying  a  great  bag,  filled  with  arti- 
cles brought  from  London  the  day  before,  went  to  the  school 
which  I  have  before  mentioned,' in  order  to  distribute  her 
prizes  and  presents,  Mr.  Aubrey  and  Dr.  Tatham  set  off  on 
a  walk  through  the  village. 

"  I  must  really  do  something  for  that  old  steeple  of  yours, 
(Doctor,"  said  Aubrey,  as  arm  in  arm  they  approached  the 
i  church  ;  "  It  looks  crumbling  away  in  many  parts." 

"  If  you'd  only  send  a  couple  of  masons  to  repair  the  porch, 
and  make  it  weather-tight,  it  would  satisfy  me  for  some 
years  to  come,"  said  the  Doctor. 

"  Well— we  11  look  at  it,"  replied  Aubrey ;  and,  turning 
aside,  they  entered  the  little  churchyard. 

"  How  I  love  this  old  yeAv-tree !  he  exclaimed  as  they 
passed  under  it ;  "  it  casts  a  kind  of  tender  gloom  around 
that  always  makes  me  pensive,  not  to  say  melancholy !  " 
A  sigh  escaped  him,  as  his  eye  glanced  at  the  family  vault, 
which  was  almost  in  the  centre  of  the  shade,  where  lay  his 
father,  three  brothers,  and  a  sister,  and  where,  in  the  course 
of  nature,  a  few  short  years  would  see  the  precious  remains 
of  his  mother  deposited.  But  the  Doctor  who  had  hastened 
forward  alone  for  a  moment,  finding  the  church  door  open, 
called  out  to  Mr.  Aubrey,  who  soon  stood  within  the  porch. 
It  certainly  required  a  little  repairing,  which  Mr.  Aubrey 
said  should  be  looked  to  immediately.  "  See — we're  all  pre- 
paring for  to-morrow,"  said  Dr.  Tatham,  leading  the  way 
into  the  little  church,  where  the  grizzle-headed  clerk  was 
busy  decorating  the  pulpit,  reading-desk,  and  altar-piece, 
with  the  cheerful  emblems  of  the  season. 

"  I  never  see  these,"  said  the  Doctor,  taking  up  one  of  the 
sprigs  of  mistletoe  lying  on  a  form  beside  them,  but  I  think 
of  your  own  Christmas  verses,  Mr.  Aubrey,  when  you  were 
younger  and  fresher  than  you  now  are — don't  you  recollect 
them?" 

"Oh-pooh!" 

"  But  I  remember  them,"  rejoined  the  Doctor ;  and  he 
began,— 
if  'Hail  !  silvery,  modest  mistletoe, 

Wreath'  d  round  winter's  brow  of  snow, 
Clinging  so  chastely,  tenderly  : 
Hail  holly,  darkly,  richly  green, 
Whose  crimson  berries  blush  between 
The  prickly  foliage,  modestly. 
Ye  winter-flowers,  bloom  sweet  and  fair, 
Though  Nature's  garden  else  be  bare — 
•     Ye  vernal  glistening  emblems,  meet 
To  twine  a  Christmas  coronet!" 

"That  will  do,  Doctor,"  interrupted  Aubrey  smiling— • 
"what  a  memory  you  have  for  trifles !  " 
"  Peggy !    Peggy ! — you're  sadly  overdoing  it,"  said  the 


TEN  THOUSAND  A-YEAE.  189 

Doctor,  calling  out  to  the  sexton's  wife,  who  was  busy  at 
work  in  the  squire's  pew— a  large  square  pew  in  the  nave, 
near  the  pulpit.  "  Why,  do  you  want  to  nide  the  squire's 
family  from  the  congregation  ?  You're  quite  putting  a  holly 
hedge  all  round ! " 

"  Please  you,  sir,"  quoth  Peggy,  "  I've  got  so  much  I  don't 
know  where  to  put  it — so,  in  course,  I  put  it  here !  " 

"  Then,"  said  the  Doctor,  with  a  smile,  looking  round  the 
church,  "  let  John  get  up  and  stick  some  of  it  into  those  old 
hatchments ;  and,"  looking  up  at  the  clerk,  busy  at  work  in 
the  pulpit,  "  don't  you  put  quite  so  much  up  there  in  my 
candlesticks ! " 

With  this  the  parson  and  the  squire  took  their  departure. 
As  they  passed  slowly  up  the  village,  which  already  wore  a  sort 
of  holiday  aspect,  they  met  on  all  hands  with  a  cordial  and 
respectful  greeting.  The  quiet  little  public-house  turned  out 
some  four  or  five  stout  steady  fellows — all  tenants  of  Mr. 
Aubrey's— with  their  pipes  in  their  hands,  and  who  took  off 
their  hats,  and  bowed  very  low.  Mr.  Aubrey  went  up  and 
entered  into  conversation  with  them  for  some  minutes — their 
families  and  farms,  he  found,  were  well  and  thriving.  There 
was  quite  a  little  crowd  of  women  about  the  shop  of  Xick 
Steele,  the  butcher,  who,  with  an  extra  hand  to  help  him, 
was  giving  out  the  second  ox  which  had  been  sent  from  the 
Hall,  to  the  persons  whose  names  had  been  given  in  to  him 
from  Mrs.  Aubrey.  Further  on,  sonie  were  cleaning  their 
little  windows,  others  sweeping  their  floors,  and  sprinkling 
sand  over  them ;  most  were  sticking  holly  and  mistletoe  in 
their  windows,  and  over  their  mantelpieces.  Everywhere, 
in  short,  was  to  be  seen  that  air  of  quiet  preparation  for  the 
solemnly  cheerful  morrow,  which  fills  a  thoughtful  observer 
with  feelings  of  pensive  but  exquisite  satisfaction. 

Mr.  Aubrey  returned  home  towards  dusk,  cheered  and 
enlivened  by  his  walk.  His  sudden  plunge  into  the  simplicity 
and  comparative  solitude  of  country  life— and  that  country 
Yatton— had  quite  refreshed  his  feelings,  and  given  a  tone  to 
his  spirits.  Of  course  Dr.  Tatham  was  to  dine  at  the  Hall  on 
the  morrow ;  if  he  did  not,  indeed,  it  would  have  been  for 
the  first  time  during  the  last  five-and-twenty  years, 

Christmas  eve  passed  pleasantly  and  quietly  enough  at  the 
Hall.  After  dinner  the  merry  little  ones  were  introduced, 
and  their  prattle  and  romps  occupied  an  hour  right  joyously. 
As  soon  as,  smothered  with  kisses,  they  had  been  dismissed 
to  bed,  old  Mrs.  Aubrey  composed  herself  in  her  great  chair  . 
to  her  usual  after-dinner's  nap  ;  while  her  son,  his  wife,  and 
sister,  sitting  fronting  the  fire— a  decanter  or  two,  and  a  few 
wine-glasses  and  dessert,  remaining  on  the  table  behind  them 
—sat  conversing  in  a  subdued  tone,  now  listening  to  the  wind 
roaring  in  the  chimney — a  sound  which  not  a  little  enhanced 
their  sense  of  comfort — then  criticising  the  disposition  of  the 
evergreens  with  which  the  room  was  plenteously  decorated,. 


190  TEN  THOUSAND  A-TEAE. 

and  laying1  out  their  movements  during  the  ensuing  fort- 
night.  Mrs.  Aubrey  and  Kate  were,  with  affectionate  ear- 
nestness, contrasting  to  Aubrey  the  peaceful  pleasures  of  a 
country  life  with  the  restless  excitement  and  endless  anxie- 
ties of  a  Londpn  political  life,  to  which  they  saw  him  more 
and  more  addicting  himself ;  he  all  the  while  playfully  par- 
rying  their  attacks,  but  secretly  acknowledging  the  truth 
and  force  of  what  they  said,  when  hark!— a  novel  sound 
from  without,  which  roused  the  old  lady  from  her  nap. 
What  do  you  think,  dear  reader,  it  was  ?  The  voices  of  little 
girls  singing  what  seemed  to  be  a  Christmas  hymn:  yes,  they 
caught  the  words — 

"Hark!  the  herald  angels  sing, 
Glory  to  the  new-born  king; 
Peace  on  earth,  and  mercy  mild  "— 

"  Why,  surely— it  must  be  your  little  school  girls,"  said 
old  Mrs.  Aubrey,  looking  at  her  daughter,  and  listening. 

"  I  do  believe  it  is ! "  quoth  Kate,  her  eves  suddenly  filling 
with  tears,  as  she  sat  eagerly  inclining  her  ear  towards  the 
window. 

"  They  must  be  standing  on  the  grass-plot  just  before  the 
window,"  said  Mr.  Aubrey :  the  tiny  voices  were  thrilling 
his  very  heart  within  him.  His  sensitive  nature  might  be 
compared  to  a  delicate  ^Eolian  harp,  which  gave  forth,  with 
the  slightest  breath  of  accident  or  circumstance, — 

"  The  still,  sad  music  of  humanity." 

In  a  few  moments  he  was  almost  in  tears — the  sounds  were  so 
unlike  the  fierce  and  turbulent  cries  of  political  warfare  to 
which  his  ears  had  been  latterly  accustomed !  The  more  the 
poor  children  sung,  the  more  was  he  affected.  Kate's  tears 
fell  fast,  for  she  had  been  in  an  excited  mood  before  this 
little  incident  occurred.  "  Do  you  hear,  mamma,"  said  she, 
"  the  voice  of  the  poor  little  thing  that  was  last  taken  into 
the  school  ?  The  little  darling !  "  Kate  tried  to  smile  away 
her  emotion ;  but  "'twas  in  vain.  Mr.  Aubrey  gently  drew 
aside  the  curtain,  and  pulled  up  the  central  blind — and  there, 
headed  by  their  matron,  stood  the  little  singers  exposed  to 
view,  some  eighteen  in  number,  ranged  in  a  row  on  tne  grass, 
their  small  white  shawls  glistening  in  the  moonlight.  The 
oldest  seemed  not  more  than  ten  or  twelve  years  old,  while 
the  younger  ones  could  not  be  more  than  five  or  six.  They 
seemed  all  singing  from  their  very  hearts.  Aubrey  stood 
looking  at  them  with  very  deep  interest. 

As  soon  as  they  had  finished  their  hymn,  they  were  con- 
ducted into  the  housekeeper's  room,  according  to  orders  sent 
for  that  purpose  from  Mrs.  Aubrey,  and  each  of  them  re* 
ceived  a  little  present  of  money,  besides  a  full  glass  of  Mrs. 
Jackson's  choicest  raisin  wine,  and  a  currant  bun  j  Kate  slip- 


TEN  THOUSAND  A-TEAE.  191 

ping  half-a-guinea  into  the  hand  of  their  mistress,  to  whose 
wish  to  afford  gratificati9n  to  the  inmates  of  the  Hall  was 
entirely  owing  the  little  incident  which  had  so  pleased  and 
surprised  them. 

"  A  happy  Christmas  to  you,  dear  papa  and  mamma ! "  said 
little  Aubrey,  about  eight  o'clock  the  next  morning,  pushing 
aside  the  curtain,  and  trying  to  clamber  up  on  the  high  bed 
where  Mr.  and  Mrs.  Aubrey  were  still  asleep — soon,  however, 
they  were  awoke  by  the  welcome  sound  !— The  morning 
promised  a  beautiful  day.  The  air,  though  cold,  was  clear ; 
and  the  branches  of  the  trees  visible  from  their  windows 
were  all  covered  with  hoar-frost?  which  seemed  to  line  them 
as  if  with  silver  fringe.  The  little  bells  of  Yatton  church 
were  ringing  a  merry  peal ;  but  how  different  in  tone  and 
strength  from  the  clangor  of  the  London  church-bells! — 
Christmas  was  indeed  at  last  arrived — and  cheerful  were  the 
greetings  of  those  who  soon  after  met  at  the  bountiful  break- 
fast table.  Old  Mrs.  Aubrey  was  going  to  church  with  them 
— in  fact,  not  even  a  domestic  was  to  be  left  at  home  that 
could  possibly  be  spared.  By  the  time  that  the  carriage, 
with  the  fat  and  lazy-looking  gray  horses,  was  at  the  Hall 
door,  the  sun  had  burst  out  in  beauty  from  an  almost  cloud- 
less sky.  The  three  ladies  rode  alone  ;  Aubrey  preferring  to 
walk,  accompanied  by  his  little  son,  as  the  ground  was  dry 
and  hard,  and  the  distance  very  short.  A  troop  of  some 
twelve  or  fourteen  servants,  male  and  female,  presently  fol- 
lowed ;  and  then  came  Mr.  Aubrey,  leading  along  the  heir  of 
Yatton — a  boy  of  whom  he  might  well  be  proud,  as  the  future 
possessor  of  his  name,  his  fortune,  and  his  honors.  When 
he  had  reached  the  church,  the  carriage  was  returning  home. 
Almost  the  whole  congregation  stood  collected  before  the 
church  door,  to  see  the  Squire's  family  enter  ;  and  reverent 
were  the  curtsies  and  bows  with  which  old  Mrs.  Aubrey 
and  her  lovely  companions  were  received.  Very  soon  after 
they  had  taken  their  places,  Mr.  Aubrey  and  his  son  made 
their  appearance ;  objects  they  were  of  the  deepest  interest, 
as  they  passed  along  to  their  pew.  A  few  minutes  after- 
wards little  Dr.  Tatham  entered  the  church  in  his  surplice, 
(which  he  almost  always  put  on  at  home,)  with  a  face,  serious 
to  be  sure,  but  yet  overspread  with  an  expression  even  more 
bland  and  benignant  than  usual.  He  knew  there  was  not  a 
soul  among  the  little  crowd  around  him  that  did  not  really 
love  him,  and  that  did  not  know  how  heartily  he  returned 
their  love.  All  eyes  were  of  course  on  the  Squire's  pew,  Mrs. 
Aubrey  was  looking  well — her  daughter  and  daughter-in-law 
were  thought  by  all  to  be  by  far  the  most  beautiful  women 
in  the  world— what  must  people  think  of  them  in  London  ? 
Mr.  Aubrey  looked,  they  thought,  pleased  and  happy,  but 
rather  paler,  and  even  a  little  thinner ;  and  as  for  the  little 
Squire,  with  his  bright  eyes,  his  rosy  cheeks,  his  arch  smile, 
his  curling  auburn  nair — and  so  like  his  father  and  mother 
—be  was  the  pride  of  Yatton.1 


192  TEN  THOUSAND  A-YEAE. 

Dr.  Tatham  read  prayers,  as  he  always  did,  with  great  dis. 
tinctness  and  deliberation,  so  that  everybody  in  the  church, 
young  and  old,  could  catch  every  syllable  ;  and  he  preached, 
considerately  enough,  a  very  short  sermon— pithy,  homely, 
and  affectionate.  He  reminded  them  that  he  Avas  then  preach- 
ing his  thirty-first  Christmas-day  sermon  from  that  pulpit ! 
The  service  and  the  sacrament  over,  none  of  the  congregation 
moved  from  their  places  till  the  occupants  of  the  Squire's 
pew  had  quitted  it ;  but  as  soon  as  they  had  got  outside  of 
the  door,  the  good  people  poured  out  after  them,  and  almost 
lined  the  way  from  the  church  door  to  the  gate  at  which  the 
carriage  stood,  receiving  and  answering  a  hundred  kind  in- 
quiries concerning  themselves,  their  families,  and  their  cir- 
cumstances. 

Mr.  Aubrey  stayed  behind,  desirous  of  taking  another  little 
ramble  with  Dr.  Tatham  through  the  village,  for  the  day  was 
indeed  bright  and  beautiful,  and  the  occasion  inspiriting. 
There  was  not  a  villager  within  four  or  five  miles  of  the  Hall 
who  did  not  sit  down  that  day  to  a  comfortable  little  relish- 
ing dinner,  at  least  one  third  of  them  being  indebted  for  it 
directly  to  the  bounty  of  the  Aubreys.  As  soon  as  Dr.  Tatham 
had  taken  off  his  gown,  he  accompanied  Mr.  Aubrey  in  cheer- 
ful mood,  in  the  briskest  spirits.  Twas  delightful  to  see  the 
smoke  come  curling  out  or  every  chimney,  scarce  any  one 
visible,  suggesting  to  you  that  they  were  all  housed,  and  pre- 
paring for  or  partaking  of  their  roast-beef  and  plum-pudding ! 
Now  and  then  the  bustling  wife  would  show  her  heated  red 
face  at  the  door,  and  hastily  curtsey  as  they  passed,  then  re- 
turning to  dish  up  her  little  dinner. 

•'  Ah,  ha ;  Mr.  Aubrey !— isn't  such  a  day  as  this  worth  a 
whole  year  in  town  ?  "  exclaimed  Dr.  Tatnam. 

"  Both  have  their  peculiar  influences,  Doctor  ;  the  pleasure 

of  the  contrast  would  be  lost  if "  Contrast !  Believe  me,  in 

the  language  of  Virgil — 

"  Ah  T  how  goes  on  old  blind  Bess,  Doctor  ?  "  interrupted 
Aubrey,  as  they  approached  the  smallest  cottage  in  the  village 
—in  fact  the  very  last. 

"  She's  just  the  same  as  she  has  been  these  last  twenty 
years.  Shall  we  look  in  on  the  old  creature  ! 

"  With  all  my  heart.  I  hope,  poor  soul !  that  she  has  not 
been  overlooked  on  this  festive  occasion." 

"  Trust  Mrs.  Aubrey  for  that !  I'll  answer  for  it,  we  shall 
find  old  Bess  as  happy,  in  her  way,  as  she  can  be.'" 

This  was  a  stone-blind  old  woman,  who  had  been  bedridden 
for  the  last  twenty  years.  She  had  certainly  passed  her  hun- 
dreth  year— some  said  two  or  three  years  before-and  had  lived 
in  her  present  little  cottage  for  nearly  half  a  century,  having 
grown  out  of  the  recollection  of  almost  all  the  inhabitants  of 
the  village.  She  had  long  been  a  pensioner  of  Mrs.  Aubrey's, 
by  whom  alone,  indeed,  she  was  supported.  Her  great  age, 
her  singular  appearance,  and  a  certain  rambling  way  of  talk- 


TEN  THOUSAND  A-YEAE.  193 

ing  that  she  had,  earned  her  the  reputation  in  the  village  of 
being  able  to  say  strange  things  ;  and  one  or  two  of  the  old 
gossips  knew  of  things  coming  to  pass  according  to  what — 
poor  old  soul— she  had  predicted ! 

Dr.  Tathain  gently  pushed  open  the  door.  The  cottage 
consisted,  in  fact,  of  but  one  room,  and  that  a  very  small  one, 
and  lit  by  only  one  little  window.  The  floor  was  clean,  and 
evidently  just  fresh  sanded.  On  a  wooden  stool,  opposite  a 
fireplace,  on  which  a  small  suacepan  pot  was  placed,  sat  a 
girl  about  twelve  years  old,  (a  daughter  of  the  _  woman  who 
lived  nearest,)  crumbling  some  bread  into  a  basin,  with  some 
broth  in  it.  On  a  narrow  bed  against  the  wall,  opposite  the 
window,  was  to  be  seen  the  somewhat  remarkable  figure  of 
the  solitary  old  tenant  of  the  cottage.  She  was  sitting  up, 
.  resting  against  the  pillow,  which  was  placed  on  end  against 
the  wall.  She  was  evidently  a  very  tall  woman  ;  and  her 
long,  brown,  wrinkled,  shrivelled  face,  with  prominent  cheek- 
bones and  bushy  white  eyebrows,  betokened  the  possessiou, 
in  earlier  days:  of  a  most  masculine  expression  of  features, 
Her  hair,  white  as  snow,  was  gathered  back  from  her  fore- 
head, under  a  spreading  plain  white  cap  ;  and  her  sightless 
eyes,  wide  open,  stared  forward  with  a  startling  and  some- 
what sinister  expression.  She  was  wrapped  round  in  a  clean 
white  bedgown ;  and  her  long  thin  arms  lay  straight  before 
her  on  the  outside  of  the  bed-clothes.  Her  lips  were  moving, 
as  if  she  were  talking  to  herself. 

"  She's  a  strange-looking  object,  indeed  !  "  exclaimed  Mr. 
Aubrey,  as  he  and  Dr.  Tatham  stood  watching  her  for  a  few 
moments  in  silence. 

"  Dame  !  Dame  !  "  said  the  Doctor  loudly,  approaching  her 
bedside,  "  how  are  you  to-day  ?  It's  Christmas-day — 1  wish 
you  a  merry  Christmas. " 

"  Ay,  ay — merry,  merry !  More  the  merrier  !  I've  seen  a 
hundred  and  nine  of  them !  " 

''  You  seem  very  happy,  dame." 

"  They  won't  give  me  my  broth— my  broth  "  said  she,  peev- 
ishly. 

"  It's  coming,  granny,"  called  out  the  shrill  voice  of  the 
girl  sitting  before  the  fire,  quickening  her  motions. 

'  Here's  the  Squire  come  to  see  you,  dame,  and  he  wishes 
you  a  happy  Christmas,"  said  Dr.  Tatham, 

"  What  the  Squire  ?  Alive  yet  ?  Ah,  well-a-day !  well-a-day  " 
said  she,  in  a  feeble,  mournful  tone,  slowly  rubbing  together 
her  long,  skinny,  wrinkled  hands,  on  the  backs  of  which  the 
veins  stood  out  like  knotted  whipcord.  She  repeated  the 
last  words  several  times,  in  a  truly  doleful  tone,  gently  shak- 
ing her  head. 

Granny's  been  very  sad,  sir,to-day,  and  cried  two  or  three 
times,"  said  the  little  girl,  stirring  about  the  hot  broth. 

"  Poor  Squire !  doth  he  not  look  sad  ? "  inquired  the  old 
woman. 


194  TEN  THOUSAND  A-YEAtt. 

"Why  should  I,  dame?  What  have  I  to  fear?"  said  Mr 
Aubrey. 

"  Merry  in  the  Hall !  all,  merry !  merry !  But  no  one  has 
heard  it  but  old  blind  Bess.  Where's  the  Squire  ?  "  she  add* 
ed,  suddenly  turning  her  face  full  towards  where  they  were 
standing  — and  it  seemed  whitened  with  emotion.  Her  star' 
ing  eyes  were  settled  on  Mr.  Aubrey's  face,  as  if  she  were 
reading  his  very  soul. 

'•  Here  1  am,  dame,"said  he,  with  a  great  deal  of  curiosity, 
to  say  the  least  of  it. 

"  Give  me  your  hand,  Squire,"  said  she,  stretching  out  her 
left  arm,  and  working  about  her  talon-like  ringers,  as  if  in 
eagerness  to  grasp  Mr.  Aubrey's  hand?  which  he  gave  her. 

"  Never  fear !  never,  never !  Happy  in  the  Hall !  I  see  all  I 
How  long " 

"  Why,  dame,  ths  istruly  a  very  pleasant  greeting  of  yours, " 
interposed  Dr.  Tatham  with  a  smile. 

"  Snort  and  bitter !  long  and  sweet !  Put  your  trust  in  God- 
Squire." 

"  I  hope  I  do,  granny,"  replied  Mr.  Aubrey  seriously. 

"  I  see  !  I  hear ! — my  broth !— where  is  it?  " 

"  Here  it  is,  granny,"  said  the  girl.  "  Good-day,  dame," 
said  Mr.  Aubrey,  gently  disengaging  his  hand  from  hers ; 
and  before  they  had  left  the  cottage  she  began  to  swallow 
very  greedily  the  broth  with  which  the  little  girl  fed  her. 

"  This  is  the  sort  of  way  in  which  this  old  superannuated 
creature  has  frightened  one  or  two  of " 

"  Is  it  indeed  f  "  inquired  Mr.  Aubrey,  with  a  sort  of  me- 
chanical smile.  Dr.  Tatham  saw  that  lie  was  in  a  somewhat 
serious  humor. 

"  She's  alarmed  you,  I  protest !— I  protest  she  has  ! "  ex- 
claimed the  Doctor,  with  a  smile,  as  they  walked  along. 
Now,  he  knew  the  disposition  and  character  of  Aubrey  inti- 
mately ;  and  was  well  aware  of  a  certain  tendency  he  had  to 
superstition. 

"  My  dear  Doctor,  I  assure  you  that  you  are  mistaken— I 
am  indeed  not  alarmed— but  at  the  same  time  I  will  tell  you 
something  not  a  little  singular.  Would  you  believe  that  a 
month  or  two  ago,  when  in  the  town,  I  dreamed  that  I  heard 
some  one  uttering  something  very  much  like  the  words  which 
this  old  woman  has  just  been  uttering?" 

"  Ah !  ha,  ha !  "  laughed  the  Doctor ;  and,  after  a  second  or 
two's  pause,  Aubrey,  as  if  ashamed  of  what  he  had  said, 
echoed  the  laugh,  and  their  conversation  passed  on  to  politi- 
cal topics,  which  kept  them  engaged  for  the  remainder  of 
their  walk,  Mr.  Aubrey  quitting  his  companion  at  the  door 
of  the  vicarage,  to  be  rejoined  by  him  at  five  o'clock,  the  din- 
ner hour  at  the  Hall.  As  Mr.  Aubrey  walked  along  the  park, 
the  shades  of  evening  casting  a  deepening  gloom  around  him, 
his  thoughts  involuntarily  recurred  to  the  cottage  of  old 
blind  Bess,  and  he  felt  vague  apprehensions  flitting  with 


TEN  THOUSAND  A-TEAR.  195 

darkening  shade  across  his  mind.  Though  he  was  hardly 
weak  enough  to  attach  any  definite  meaning  or  importance 
to  the  gibberish  he  had  heard,  it  still  had  left  an  unpleasant 
impression,  and  he  was  vexed  at  feeling  a  wish  that  the  in- 
cident—trifling as  he  was  willing  to  believe  it— should  not 
be  mentioned  by  Dr.  Tatham  at  the  Hall ;  and  still  more,  on 
recollecting  that  he  had  purposely  abstained  f  rom  requesting 
the  good  Doctor  not  to  do  so.  All  this  implied  that  the  mat- 
ter had  occupied  his  thoughts  to  a  greater  extent  than  he 
secretly  relished.  On  reaching,  however,  the  Hall  door,  this 
brief  pressure  on  his  feelings  quickly  ceased ;  for  on  entering 
he  saw  Mrs.  Aubrey,  his  sister,  and  his  two  children,  at  high 
romps  together  in  the  hall,  and  he  heartily  joined  in  them. 


CHAPTER  VIII. 

BY  five  o'clock  the  little  party  were  seated  at  the  cheerful 
dinner-table,  covered  with  the  glittering  old  family  plate, 
and  that  kind  of  fare,  at  once  substantial  and  luxurious, 
which  befitted  the  occasion.  Old  Mrs.  Aubrey,  in  her  simple 
white  turban  and  black  velvet  dress,  presided  with  a  kind  of 
dignified  cheerfulness  which  was  delightful  to  see.  Kate 
had  contrived  to  make  herself  look  more  lovely  even  than 
usual,  wearing  a  dress  of  dark-blue  satin,  tastefully  trimmed 
with  blonde,  and  which  exquisitely  comported  with  her 
beautiful  complexion.  Oh  that  Delamere  had  been  sitting 
opposite  to,  or  beside  her !  The  more  matured  proportions 
of  her  blooming  sister-in-law  appeared  to  infinite  advantage 
in  a  rich  green  velvet  dress,  while  a  superb  diamond  glis- 
tened with  subdued  lustre  on  her  beautiful  bosom.  She  \vore 
no  ornaments  in  her  dark  hair,  which  was,  as  indeed  might 
be  said  of  Kate,  "  when  unadorned,  adorned  the  most."  The 
gray-headed  old  butler,  as  brisk  as  his  choicest  champagne, 
with  which  he  perpetually  bustled  round  the  table,  and  the 
two  steady-looking  old  family  servants,  going  about  their 
business  with  quiet  celerity — the  delicious  air  of  antique 
elegance  around  them, — this  was  a  Christmas  dinner  after 
one's  own  heart ! — Oh  the  merry  and  dear  old  Yatton !  And 
as  if  there  were  not  loveliness  enough  already  in  the  room, 
behold  the  door  suddenly  pushed  open  as  soon  as  the  dessert 
is  on  the  table,  and  run  up  to  his  gay  and  laughing  mother, 
her  little  son,  his  ample  snowy  collar  resting  gracefully  on 
his  crimson  velvet  dress.  'Tis  her  hope  and  pride — her  first- 
born—the little  squire;  but  where  is  his  sister? — where  is 
Agnes  ?  'Tis  even  as  Charles  says—  she  fell  asleep  in  the 
very  act  of  being  dressed,  and  they  were  obliged  to  put  her 
to  bed;  so  Charles  is  alone  in  his  glory.  You  may  well  fold 
your  delicate  white  arm  around  him,  mamma  ! — 

His  little  gold  cup  is  nearly  filled  to  join  in  the  first  toast ; 


19R  TEN  THOUSAND  A-YBAlt. 

are  you  all  ready?  The  worthy  Doctor  has  poured  Mrs. 
Aubrey's  glass  and  Kate's  glass  full  up  to  the  brim:— Our 
next  Christmas  ! 

Yes,  your  next  Ch  ristmas !  The  vigilant  eye  of  Dr.  Tatham 
alone  perceived  a  faint  change  of  color  in  Mr.  Aubrey's  cheek 
as  the  words  were  uttered ;  and  his  eye  wandered  for  an  in- 
stant, as  if  tracing  across  the  room  the  image  of  old  blind 
Bess ;  but  'twas  gone  in  a  moment ;  Aubrey  was  soon  in 
much  higher  spirits  than  usual.  Well  he  might  be.  How 
could  man  be  placed  in  happier  circumstances  than  he  was  ? 
As  soon  as  the  ladies  had  withdrawn,  together  with  little 
Aubrey,  the  Doctor  and  Mr.  Aubrey  drew  their  chairs  before 
the  fire,  and  enjoyed  a  long  hour's  pleasant  chat  on  matters 
domestic  and  political.  As  to  the  latter,  the  parson  and  the 
squire  were  stout  Tories  ;  and  a  speech  which.  Aubrey  had 
lately  delivered  in  the  House,  on  the  Catholic  claims,  had 
raised  him  to  a  pitch  of  eminence  in  the  parson's  estimation, 
where  he  had  very  few  men  in  the  country  to  keep  him  com- 
pany. The  Doctor  here  got  on  very  fast  indeed ;  and  was 
just  assuring  the  Squire  that  he  saw  dark  days  in  store  for 
Old  England  from  the  machinations  of  the  Papists ;  and  that, 
for  his  part,  he  should  rejoice  to  "  seal  his  testimony  with 
his  blood,"  and  would  goto  the  stake  not  only  without  flinch- 
ing, but  rejoicing— (all  which  I  verily  believe  he  verily  be- 
lieved he  would  have  done) — and  coveting  the  crown  of 
martyrdom — when  Aubrey  caught  the  sounds  of  his  sister 
playing  on  the  organ,  a  noble  instrument,  which  a  year  or 
two  before,  at  her  urgent  request,  he  had  purchased  and 
placed  in  the  drawing-room,  whither  he  and  the  Doctor  at 
once  repaired.  'Twas  a  spacious  and  lofty  room,  well 
calculated  for  the  splendid  instrument  which  occupied 
the  large  recess  fronting  the  door.  Miss  Aubrey  was 
playing  Handel,  and  with  an  exquisite  perception  of  his 
matchless  power  and  beauty.  Hark !  did  you  ever  hear  the 
grand  yet  simple  recitative  she  is  now  commencing  ? 

"  In  the  days  of  Herod  the  king,  behold,  there  came  wise 
(  men  from  the  East  to  Jerusalem, 

"  Saying—  Where  is  he  that  is  born  King  of  the  Jews  ?  for 
we  have  seen  his  star  in  the  East,  and  are  come  to  worship 

k    •  55 

him. 

The  Doctor  officiated  as  chaplain  that  evening.  The  room 
was  almost  filled  with  servants,  many  of  whose  looks  very 
plainly  showed  the  merry  doings  that  had  been  going  on  in 
the  servant's  hall ;  some  of  them  could  scarce  keep  their  eyes 
open ;  one  or  two  sat  winking  at  each  other,  and  so  forth. 
Under  the  circumstances,  therefore,  the  Doctor,  with  much 
judgment,  ready  very  short  prayers,  and  immediately  after- 
wards  took  his  departure  for  his  snug  little  vicarage. 

The  next  morning,  which  proved  as  fine  as  the  preceding, 


TEN  THOUSAND  A-YEAE.  197 

Mr.  Aubrey  was  detained  in-doors  with  his  letters,  and  one 
or  two  other  little  matters  of  business  in  his  library,  till 
luncheon  time.  "  What  say  you,  Kate,  to  a  ride  round  the 
estate  ?  "  said  he,  on  taking  his  seat.  Miss  Aubrey  was  de- 
lighted ;  and  forthwith  the  horses  were  ordered  to  be  got 
ready  as  soon  as  possible. 

"  You  must  not  mind  a  little  rough  riding,  Kate,"  said 
Aubrey;  "for  we've  got  to  go  over  some  ugly  places.  I'm 
going  to  meet  Waters  at  the  end  of  the  avenue,  about  that 
old  sycamore— we  must  have  it  down  at  last." 

"  Oh  no,  Charles,  no ;  I  thought  we  had  settled  that  last 
year,"  replied  Kate  earnestly. 

"  Pho !  if  it  had  not  been  for  you,  Kate,  it  would  have  been 
down  two  years  ago  at  least.  Its  hour  is  come  at  last ;  'tis 
indeed,  so  no  pouting !  It  is  injuring  the  other  trees  ;  and, 
beside,  it  spoils  the  prospect  from  the  back  of  the  house." 

"'Tis  only  Waters  that  puts  all  these  things  into  your 
head,  Charles,  and  I  shall  let  him  know  my  opinion  on  the 
subject  when  I  see  him !  Mamma,  haven't  you  a  word  to  say 
for  the  old " 

But  Mr.  Aubrey,  not  deeming  it  discreet  to  await  the  new 
force  which  was  being  brought  against  him,  started  off  to  go 
round  and  see  a  newly-purchased  horse,  just  brought  to  the 
stables. 

Kate,  who  really  became  everything,  looked  charming  in 
her  blue  riding-habit,  sitting  on  her  horse  with  infinite 
ease  and  grace— a  capital  horsewoman.  The  exercise  soon 
brought  a  rich  bloom  upon  her  cheek  ;  and  as  she  cantered 
along  the  road  by  the  side  of  her  brother,  no  one  that  met 
them  but  must  have  been  struck  with  her  beauty.  Just  as 
they  had  dropped  into  an  easy  walk — 

"  Charles,"  said  she,  observing  two  horsemen  approaching 
them.  "  who  can  these  be?  Heavens  !  did  you  ever  see  such 
figures?  And  how  they  ride !" 

"  Why,  certainly,"  replied  her  brother  smiling,  "  they  look 
a  brace  of  undoubted  Cockneys !  what  can  they  be  doing  in 
these  parts  ?  " 

"Dear  me,  what  puppies!  "  exclaimed  Miss  Aubrey,  low- 
ering her  voice  as  they  neared  the  persons  she  spoke  of. 

"  They  are  certainly  a  most  extraordinary  couple !  W ho 
can  they  be  ?  "  said  Mr.  Aubrey,  a  smile  forcing  itself  into 
his  features-  One  of  the  two  was  dressed  in  a  light  blue 
surtout,  with  the  tip  of  a  white  pocket  handkerchief  seen 
peeping  out  of  a  pocket  in  the  front  of  it.  His  hat,  with 
scarce  any  brim  to  it,  was  stuck  aslant  on  the  top  of  a  bushy 
head  of  queer  colored  hair.  His  shirt  collars  were  turned 
down  completely  over  his  stock,  displaying  a  great  quantity 
of  dirt-colored  hair  under  his  chin;  while  a  pair  of 
mustaches,  of  the  same  color,  were  sprouting  upon  his 
upper  lip.  A  quizzing  glass  was  stuck  in  his  right  eye,  and 
in  his  hand  he  carried  a  whip  with  a  shining  silver  head, 


198  TEN  THOUSAND  A-TEAE. 

The  other  was  almost  equally  distinguished  by  the  elegance 
of  his  appearance.  He  had  a  glossy  hat,  a  purple  colored 
velvet  waistcoat,  two  pins  connected  by  little  chains  in  his 
stock,  a  bottle-green  surtout,  sky-blue  trousers.  In  short, 
who  should  these  be  but  our  old  friends  Messrs.  Titmouse 
and  Snap?  Whoever  they  might  be,  it  was  plain  that  they 
were  perfect  novices  on  horseback,  and  their  horses  had 
every  appearance  of  having  been  much  fretted  and  worried 
by  their  riders.  To  the  surprise  of  Mr.  Aubrey  and  his 
sister,  these  two  personages  attempted  to  rein  in,  as  they 
neared,  with  the  evident  intention  of  speaking  to  them. 

"  Pray— a— sir,  will  you,  sir,  tell  us,"  commenced  Tit- 
mouse, with  a  desperate  attempt  to  appear  at  his  ease,  as  he 
tried  to  make  his  horse  stand  still  for  a  moment—"  isn't 
there  a  place  called — called  "—here  his  horse,  whose  sides 
were  constantly  being  galled  by  the  spurs  of  its  uncon- 
scious rider,  began  to  back  a  little,  then  to  go  on  one  side, 
and,  in  Titmouse's  fright,  his  glass  dropped  from  his  eye, 
and  he  seized  hold  of  the  pummel.  Nevertheless,  to  show 
the  lady  how  completely  he  was  at  his  ease  all  the  while,  he 
levelled  a  great  many  oaths  and  curses  at  the  unfortunate 
eyes  and  soul  of  his  wayward  brute ;  who,  however,  not  in 
the  least  moved  by  them,  but  infinitely  disliking  the  spurs 
of  its  rider  and  the  twisting  round  of  its  mouth  by  the  reins, 
ssemed  more  and  more  inclined  for  mischief,  and  backed 
close  up  to  the  edge  of  the  ditch. 

"  I'm  afraid,  sir,  said  Mr.  Aubrey  kindly,  "  you  are  not 
much  accustomed  to  riding.  Will  you  permit  me 

"Oh,  yes— ye— ye— s,  sir,  I  am  uncommon— whee-o-uy ! 
whuoy!" — (then  afresh  volley  of  oaths.)  "Oh,  dear,  'poii 
my  soul— ho !— what— what  is  he  going  to  do !  Snap !  Snap !" 
—  Twas,  however,  quite  in  vain  to  call  on  that  gentleman 
for  assistance  ;  for  he  had  grown  as  pale  as  death,  on  finding 
that  his  own  brute  seemed  strongly  disposed  to  follow  the 
infernal  example  of  the  other,  and  was  particularly  inclined 
to  rear  up  on  its  hind  legs.  The  very  first  motion  of  the  sort 
brought  Snap's  heart  (not  large  enough,  perhaps,  to  choke 
him)  into  his  mouth.  Titmouse's  beast  suddenly  inclined 
the  contrary  way ;  and  throwing  its  hind  feet  into  the  air, 
sent  its  terrified  rider  flying,  head  over  heels,  into  the  very 
middle  of  the  hedge,  from  which  he  dropped  into  the  wet 
ditch.  Both  Mr.  Aubrey  and  his  groom  dismounted,  and 
secured  the  horse,  who,  havijiggot  rid  of  its  ridiculous  rider, 
stood  quietly  enough.  Titmouse  proved  to  be  more 
frightened  than  hurt.  His  hat  was  crushed  flat  on  his  head, 
and  half  the  left  side  of  his  face  covered  with  mud — as,  in- 
deed, were  his  clothes  all  the  way  down.  The  groom 
(almost  splitting  with  laughter)  helped  him  on  again ;  and  as 
Mr.  and  Miss  Aubrey  were  setting  off—"  I  think,  sir,"  said 
the  former  politely,  "you  were  inquiring  for  some  place?" 


TEN  THOUSAND  A-YEAR.  198 

"  Yes,  sir,"  quoth  Snap.  "  Isn't  there  a  place  called  Ya- 
Yat— Yat— (be  quiet,  you  brute  !)— Yatton  about  here?" 

"  Yes,  sir— straight  on,"  replied  Mr.  Aubrey.  Miss  Aubrey 
hastily  threw  her  veil  over  her  face,  to  conceal  her  laughter, 
spurred  her  horse,  and  she  and  her  brother  were  soon  out  of 
sight  of  the  strangers. 

"I  say,  Snap,"  quoth  Titmouse,  when  he  had  in  a  measure 
cleansed  himself,  and  they  had  both  got  a  little  composed. 
"  see  that  lovely  gal  ?  " 

"•  Fine  girl— devilish  fine !  "  replied  Snap. 

"  I'm  blessed  if  I  don't  think— 'pon  my  life,  I  believe  we've 
met  before  !" 

"  Didn't  seem  to  know  you  though ! " 

"Ah  !  I  don't  know  —how  uncommon  infernal  unfortunate 

to  happen  just  at  the  moment  when ''  Titmouse  became 

silent ;  for  all  of  a  sudden  he  recollected  when  and  where, 
and  under  what  circumstances  he  had  seen  Miss  Aubrey  be- 
fore, and  which  his  vanity  would  not  allow  of  his  telling 
Snap.  The  fact  was,  that  she  had  once  accompanied  her 
sister-in-law  to  Messrs.  Tag-rag  and  Company's,  to  purchase 
some  small  matter  of  mercery.  Titmouse  had  helped  her, 
and  his  absurdity  of  manner  had  provoked  a  smile,  which 
Titmouse  a  little  misconstrued  ;  for  when,  a  Sunday  or  two 
afterwards,  he  met  her  in  the  Park,  the  little  fool  had  the 
presumption  to  nod  to  her — she  having  not  the  slightest 
notion  who  he  was— and  of  course  not  having,  on  the  present 
occasion,  the  least  recollection  of  him.  The  reader  will 
remember  that  this  little  incident  made  a  deep  impression 
on  the  mind  of  Mr.  Titmouse. 

The  coincidence  was  really  not  a  little  singular — but  to 
return  to  Mr.  Aubrey  and  his  sister.  After  riding  a  mile  or 
two  further  up  the  road,  they  leaped  over  a  very  low  mound 
or  fence,  which  formed  the  extreme  boundary  of  that  part  of 
the  estate,  and  having  passed  through  a  couple  of  fields,  they 
entered  the  lower  extremity  of  that  fine  avenue  of  elms,  at 
the  higher  end  of  which  stood  Kate's  favorite  tree,  and  also 
Waters  and  his  under-bailiff— who  looked  to  her  like  a 
couple  of  executioners,  only  awaiting  the  fiat  of  her  brother. 
The  sun  shone  brightly  upon  the  doomed  sycamore — "  the 
axe  was  laid  at  its  root."  As  they  rode  up  the  avenue,  Kate 
begged  very  hard  for  mercy ;  but  for  once  her  brother  seemed 
obdurate— the  tree,  he  said,  must  come  down— 'twas  all 
nonsense  to  think  of  having  it  standing  any  longer ! — 

"Remember,  Charles,"  said  she,  passionately,  as  they 
drew  up, "  how  we've  all  of  us  romped  and  sported  under  it! 
Poor  papa  also " 

"  See,  I£ate,  how  rotten  it  is,"  said  her  brother ;  and  riding 
close  to  it,  with  his  whip  he  snapped  off  two  or  three  of  its 
feeble  silvery-gray  branches—"  it's  high  time  for  it  to  come 
down." 


200  TEN  THOUSAND  A-YEAE. 

"It  fills  the  grass  all  around  with  little  branches,  sir, 
whenever  there's  the  least  breath  of  wind,"  said  Waters. 

"It  won't  hardly  hold  a  crow's  weight  on  the  topmost 
branches,  sir,"  said  Dickons,  the  under-bailiff. 

"  Had  it  any  leaves  last  summer  ?  "  inquired  Mr.  Aubrey. 

"  I  don't  think,  sir,"  said  Waters,  "  it  had  a  hundred  all 
over  it !" 

"Really,  Kate, 'tis  such  a  melancholy,  unsightly  object, 
when  seen  from  any  part  of  the  Hall  "—turning  round  on" 
his  horse  to  look  at  the  rear  of  the  Hall,  which  was  at  about 
eighty  yards'  distance.  "  It  looks  such  an  old  withered  thing 
amongst  the  fresh  green  trees  around  it — 'tis  quite  a  painful 
contrast."  Kate  had  gently  urged  on  her  horse  while  her 
brother  was  speaking,  till  she  was  close  beside  him.  "Charles," 
said  she,  in  a  low  whisper,  "  does  not  it  remind  you  a  little 
of  poor  old  mamma,  with  her  gray  hairs,  among  her  children 
and  grandchildren  ?  She  is  not  out  of  place  amongst  us— is 
she  ?"  Her  eyes  filled  with  tears.  So  did  her  brother's. 

"  Dearest  Kate,"  said  he,  with  emotion,  affectionately 
grasping  her  little  hand,  "  you  have  triumphed !  The  old 
tree  shall  never  be  cut  down  in  my  time !  Waters,  let  the 
tree  stand ;  and  if  anything  is  to  be  done  to  it — let  the  great- 
est care  be  taken  of  it."  Miss  Aubrey  turned  her  head  aside 
to  conceal  her  emotion.  Had  they  been  alone,  she  would 
have  flung  her  arms  round  her  brother's  neck. 

"  If  I  were  to  speak  my  mind,"  said  Waters,  seeing  the 
turn  things  were  taking,  "  I  should  say,  with  our  young  lady, 
the  old  tree's  quite  a  kind  of  ornament  in  this  here  situation, 
and  (as  one  might  say)  it  sets  off  the  rest."  [It  was  he  who 
had  been  worrying  Mr.  Aubrey  for  these  last  three  years  to 
have  it  cut  down.] 

"  Well,"  replied  Mr.  Aubrey,  "  however  that  may  be,  let 
me  hear  no  more  of  cutting  it  down. — Ah  !  what  does  old 
Jolter  want  here  ?  "  said  he,  9bserving  an  old  tenant  of  that 
name,  almost  bent  double  with  age,  hobbling  towards  them. 
He  was  wrapped  up  in  a  coarse  thick  blue  coat ;  his  hair  was 
long  and  white  ;  his  eyes  dim  and  glassy  with  age. 
I  don't  know,  sir — I'll  go  and  see,"  said  Waters. 

"What's  the  matter,  Jolter  ?"  he  inquired,  stepping  for- 
ward to  meet  him. 

"  Nothing  much,  sir,"  replied  the  old  man,  taking  off  his 
hat,  and  bowing  very  low  towards  Mr.  and  Miss  Aubrey. 
Put  your  hat  on,  my  old  friend,"  said  Mr.  Aubrey  kindly. 

"  I  only  come  to  bring  you  this  bit  of  paper,  sir,  if  you 
please,"  said  the  old  man,  addressing  Waters.  "  You  said,  a 
while  ago,  as  how  I  was  always  to  bring  you  papers  that 
were  left  with  me :  and  this  "—taking  one  out  of  his  pocket 
— "  was  left  with  me  only  about  an  hour  ago.  It's  seemingly 
a  lawyer's  paper,  and  was  left  by  an  uncommon  gay  young 
Qhap.  He  ask  me  my  name,  and  then  he  looked  at 'the  paper, 


TEN  THOUSAND  A-TEAS.  201 

and  read  it  all  over  to  me,  but  I  couldn't  make  anything  of 
it." 

"What  is  it? "inquired  Mr.  Aubrey,  as  Waters  cast  his 
eye  over  a  sheet  of  paper,  partly  printed  and  partly  written. 

"  Why,  it  seems  the  old  story,  sir— that  slip  of  waste  land, 
sir.  Mr.  Tomkins  is  at  it  again,  sir." 

"  Well,  if  he  chooses  to  spend  money  in  that  way,  I  can't 
help  it,"  said  Mr.  Aubrey  with  a  smile.  "  Let  me  look  at  the 
paper."  He  did  so.  "  Yes,  it  seems  the  same  kind  of  thing 
as  before.  Well,"  handing  it  back,  "  send  it  to  Mr.  Parkin- 
son, and  tell  him  to  look  to  it ;  and,  at  all  events,  take  care 
that  poor  old  Jolter  comes  to  no  trouble  by  the  business. 
How's  the  old  wife,  Jacob  ?  " 

"  She's  dreadful  bad  with  rheumatis,  sir ;  but  the  stuff 
that  Madam  sends  her  does  her  a  woundy  deal  of  good,  sir, 
in  her  inside." 

"  Well,  we  must  try  if  we  can't  send  you  some  more ;  and, 
harkee,  if  the  goodwife  doesn't  get  better  soon,  send  us  up 
word  to  the  Hall,  and  we'll  have  the  doctor  call  on  her.  Now, 
Kate,  let  us  away  homeward."  And  they  were  soon  out  or 
sight. 

I  do  not  intend  to  deal  so  unceremoniously  or  summarily 
as  Mr.  Aubrey  did  with  the  document  which  had  been 
brought  to  his  notice  by  Jolter,  then  handed  over  to  Waters, 
and  by  him,  according  to  orders,  transmitted  the  next  day  to 
Mr.  Parkinson,  Mr.  Aubrey's  attorney.  It  was  what  is  called  a 
"  DECLARATION  IN  EJECTMENT  ;  "  touching  which,  in  order  to 
throw  a  ray  or  two  of  light  upon  a  document  which  will 
make  no  small  figure  in  this  history,  I  shall  try  to  give  the 
reader  a  little  information  on  the  point ;  and  hope  that  a  lit- 
tle attention  to  what  now  follows,  will  be  repaid  in  due  time. 

If  Jones  claims  a  debt  or  goods,  or  gamades  from  Smith. 
one  would  think  that,  if  he  went  to  law,  the  action  would  be 
entitled  "  Jones  versus  Smith  ; "  and  so  it  is.  But  behold,  if 
it  be  LAND  which  is  claimed  by  Jones  from  Smith,  the  style 
and  name  of  the  cause  stand  thus : — "  DOE,  on  the  demise  of 
Jones,  versus  ROE."  Instead,  therefore,  of  Jones  and  Smith 
fighting  out  the  matter  in  their  own  proper  names,  they  set 
up  a  couple  of  puppets,  (called  "  John  Doe"  and  "  Richard 
Roe,")  who  fall  upon  one  another  in  a  very  quaint  fashion, 
after  the  manner  of  Punch  and  Judy.  John  Doe  pretends  to 
be  the  real  plaintiff,  and  Richard  Roe  the  real  defendant 
John  Doe  says  that  the  land  which  Richard  Roe  has  is  his, 
(the  said  John  Doe's,)  because  Jones  (the  real  plaintiff)  gave 
him  a  lease  of  it ;  and  Jones  is  then  called  "  the  lessor  of  the 
plaintiff."  John  Doe  further  says  that  one  Richard  Roe, 
(who  calls  himself  by  the  very  significant  and  expressive 
name  of  a  "  Casual  JEjector"  came  and  turned  him  out,  and 
so  John  Doe  brings  his  action  against  Richard  Roe.  'Tis  a 
fact  that  whenever  land  is  sought  to  be  recovered  in  England, 
this  anomalous  and  farcical  proceeding  must  be  adopted.  It 
is  the  duty  of  the  real  plaintiff  (Jones)  to  serve  ontherazJde- 


202  TEN  THOUSAND  A-YEAR. 

fendant  (Smith)  a  copy  of  the  queer  document  which  I  shall 
proceed  to  lay  before  the  reader  ;  and  also  to  append  to  it  an 
affectionate  note,  intimating  the  serious  consequences  which 
will  ensue  upon  inattention  or  contumacy.  The  "  Declara- 
tion," then,  which  had  been  served  upon  old  Jolter,  was  in 
the  words,  letters,  and  figures  following— that  is  to  say  :— 

"  IN  THE  KING'S  BENCH. 

"  Michaelmas  Term,  — th  Geo.— 

"  YORKSHIRE,  to-wit. — Richard  Roe  was  attached  to  an- 
swer John  Doe  of  a  plea  wherefore  the  said  Richard  Roe, 
with  force  and  arms,  etc.,  entered  into  two  messuages, 
two  dwelling-houses,  two  cottages,  two  stables,  two  out- 
houses, two  yards,  two  gardens,  two  orchards,  twenty  acres 
of  land  covered  with  water,  twenty  acres  of  arable  land, 
twenty  acres  of  pasture  land,  and  twenty  acres  of  other  land, 
with  the  appurtenances,  situated  in  the  parish  of  Yatton,  in 
the  county  of  Yorkshire,  which  TITTLEBAT  TITMOUSE,  Es- 
quire, had  demised  to  the  said  John  Doe  for  a  term  which 
is  not  yet  expired,  and  ejected  him  from  his  said  farm,  and 
other  wrongs  to  the  said  John  Doe  there  did,  to  the  great 
damage  of  the  said  John  Doe,  and  against  the  peace  of  our 
Lord  the  King,  etc. ;  and  Thereupon  the  said  John  Doe,  by 
OILY  GAMMON,  his  attorney,  complains, — 

"  That  whereas  the  said  TITTLEBAT  TITMOUSE,  on  the  — th 
day  of  August,  in  the  year  of  our  Lord  18 — ,  at  the  parish  afore- 
said, in  the  county  aforesaid,  had  demised  the  same  tene- 
ments, with  the  appurtenances,  to  the  said  John  Doe,  to  have 
and  tc  hold  the  same  to  the  said  John  Doe  and  his  assigns 
thenceforth,  for  and  during,  and  unto  the  full  end  and  term 
of  twenty  years  thence  next  ensuing,  and  fully  to  be  complet- 
ed and  ended :  By  virtue  of  which  said  demise,  the  said  John 
Doe  entered  into  the  said  tenements,  with  the  appurtenances, 
and  became  and  was  thereof  possessed  for  the  said  term,  so 
to  him  thereof  granted  as  aforesaid.  And  the  said  John  Doe 
being  so  thereof  possessed,  the  said  Richard  Roe  afterwards, 
to-wit,  on  the  day  and  year  aforesaid,  at  the  parish  aforesaid, 
in  the  county  aforesaid,  with  force  and  arms,  etc.,  entered 
into  the  said  tenements,  with  the  appurtenances,  which  the 
said  TITTLEBAT  TITMOUSE  had  demised  to  the  said  John  Doe 
in  manner  and  for  the  term  aforesaid,  which  is  not  yet  ex- 
pired, and  ejected  the  said  John  Doe  from  his  said  farm  ; 
and  other  wrongs  to  the  said  John  Doe  then  and  there  did, 
to  the  great  damage  of  the  said  John  Doe,  and  against  the 
peace  of  our  said  Lord  the  now  King.  Wherefore  the  said 
John  Doe  saith  that  he  is  injured,  and  hath  sustained  dam. 
age  to  the  value  of  £50,  and  therefore  he  brings  his  suit,  etc. 
"  SQUEAL,  for  the  Plaintiff. 
GROWL,  for  the  Defendant. 
5  Pledges  of  )  John  Den. 
1  Prosecution,  j  Richard  Fenn. 


TEN  THOUSAND  A-YEAE.  203 

*'Mp..  JACOB  JOLTER, 

"  I  am  informed  that  you  are  in  possession  of,  or  claim  title  to, 
the  premises  in  this  Declaration  of  Ejectment  mentioned,  or 
to  some  part  thereof :  And  I,  being  sued  in  this  action  as  a 
casual  ejector  only,  and  having  no  claim  or  title  to  the  same, 
do  advise  you  to  appear,  next  Hilary  Term,  in  His  Majesty's 
Court  of  Common  Pleas  at  Westminster,  by  some  attorney 
of  that  Court ;  and  then  and  there,  by  a  rule  to  be  made  by 
the  same  Court,  to  cause  yourself  to  be  made  defendant  in 
my  stead  ;  otherwise,  I  shall  suffer  judgment  to  be  entered 
against  me  by  default,  and  you  will  be  turned  out  of  pos- 
session. 

"  Your  loving  friend, 

"RICHARD  ROE. 

"  Dated  this  8th  day  of  December,  18—." 


You  may  regard  the  above  document  in  the  light  of  a  dead- 
ly and  destructive  missile,  thrown  by  an  unperceived  enemy 
into  a  peaceful  citadel,  attracting  no  particular  notice  from 
the  innocent  unsuspecting  inhabitants— amongst  whom,  nev- 
ertheless, it  presently  explodes,  and  all  is  terror,  death  and 
ruin. 

Mr.  Parkinson,  Mr.  Aubrey's  solicitor,  who  resided  at  Gril- 
ston,  the  post-town  nearest  to  Yatton,  from  which  it  was 
distant  about  six  or  seven  miles,  was  sitting  on  the  evening 
of  Tuesday,  the  28th  of  December,  18 — ,  in  his  office,  nearly 
finishing  a  letter  to  his  London  agents,  Messrs.  Runnington 
and  Company — one  of  the  most  eminent  firms  in  the  profes- 
sion— and  which  he  was  desirous  of  dispatching  by  that 
night's  mail.  Amongst  other  papers  which  have  come  into 
my  hands  in  connection  with  this  history,  I  have  happened 
to  light  on  the  letter  Mr.  Parkinson  was  writing ;  and  as  it 
is  not  long,  and  affords  a  specimen  of  the  way  in  which  busi- 
ness is  carried  on  between  town  and  country  attorneys  and 
solicitors,  here  followeth  a  copy  of  it  :— 

"  Grilston,  28th  Dec.  18—. 
"  DEAR  SIRS, 

"  Re  Midddleton. 

"Have  you  got  the  marriage-settlements  between  these 
parties  ready  ?  If  so,  please  send  them  as  soon  as  possible  ; 
for  both  the  lady's  and  gentleman's  friends  are  (as  usual  in 
such  cases)  very  pressing  for  them. 

"  Puddinghead  v.  Quickwit. 

"  Plaintiff  bought  a  horse  of  defendant  in  November  last, 
'  warranted  sound,'  and  paid  for  it  on  the  spot  £64.  A  week 
afterwards  his  attention  was  accidentally  drawn  to  the  ani- 
mal's head  j  and,  to  his  infinite  surprise,  he  discovered  that 


204  TEN  THOUSAND  A-YEAR. 

the  left  eye  was  a  glass  eye,  so  closely  resembling  the  other 
in  color,  that  the  difference  could  not  be  discovered  except 
on  a  very  close  examination.  I  have  seen  it  myself,  and  it  is 
indeed  wonderfully  well  done.  My  countrymen  are  certain- 
ly pretty  sharp  hands  in  such  matters — but  this  beats  any- 
thing I  ever  heard  of.  Surely  this  is  a  breach  of  the  warran- 
ty ?  Or  is  it  to  be  considered  a  patent  defect,  which  would 
not  be  within  the  warrranty  ? — Please  take  pleader's  opinion, 
and  particularly  as  to  whether  the  horse  could  be  brought 
into  court  to  be  viewed  by  the  court  and  jury,  which  -would 
have  a  great  effect.  If  your  pleader  thinks  the  action  will  lie, 
let  him  draw  declaration,  venue — Lancashire  (for  my  client 
would  have  no  chance  with  a  Yorkshire  jury.)  If  you  think 
the  venue  is  transitory,  and  that  defendant  would  not  be  suc- 
cessful in  a  motion,  change  it.  Qu.—  Is  the  man  who  sold  the 
horse  to  defendant  a  competent  witness  for  the  plaintiff,  to 
prove  that,  when  he  sold  it  to  defendant,  it  had  but  one  eye, 
and  that  on  this  account  the  horse  was  sold  for  less  ? 

"  Mule  v.  Stott. 

"I  cannot  get  these  parties  to  come  to  an  amicable  settle- 
ment. You  may  remember,  from  the  two  former  actions, 
that  it  is  for  damages  on  account  of  two  geese  of  defendant 
having  been  found  trespassing  on  a  few  yards  of  Chatmoss 
belonging  to  the  plaintiff.  Defendant  now  contends  that  he 
is  entitled  to  common,  pour  cause  de  vicinage.  Qu. — Can  this 
be  shown  under  Not  Guilty,  or  must  it  be  pleaded  specially  ? 
— About  two  years  ago,  by  the  way,  a  pig  belonging  to  plain- 
tiff got  into  defendant's  flower  garden,  and  did  at  least  £3 
worth  of  damage — Can  this  be  in  any  way  set  off  against  the 
present  action  ?  There  is  now  no  hope  of  avoiding  a  third 
trial,  as  the  parties  are  now  more  exasperated  against  each 
other  than  ever,  and  the  expense  (as  at  least  fifteen  witnesses 
will  be  called  on  each  side)  will  amount  to  upwards  of  £250. 
You  had  better  retain  Mr.  Cacklegander. 

"  Re  Lords  Oldacre  and  De  la  Zouch, 
"  Are  the  deeds  herein  engrossed  ?    As  it  is  a  matter  of 
magnitude,  and  the  foundation  of  extensive  and  permanent 
family  arrangements,  pray  let  the  greatest  care  be  taken  to 
secure  accuracy.  Please  take  special  care  of  the  stamps — 

Thus  far  had  the  worthy  writer  proceeded  with  his  letter, 
when  Waters  made  his  appearance,  delivering  to  him  the 
declaration  in  ejectment  which  had  been  served  upon  old 
Jolter,  and  also  the  instructions  concerning  it  which  had 
been  given  by  Mr.  Aubrey.  After  Mr.  Parkinson  had  asked 
particularly  concerning  Mr.  Aubrey's  health,  and  what  had 
brought  him  so  suddenly  to  Yatton,  he  cast  his  eye  hastily 
over  the  Declaration  " — and  at  once  came  to  the  same  con- 
elusion  concerning  it  which  had  been  arrived  at  by  Waters 


TEN  THOUSAND  A-TEAR.  205 

and  Mr.  Aubrey,  viz.  that  it  was  another  little  arrow  out  of 
the"  quiver  of  the  litigious  Mr.  Tomkins.  As  soon  as  Waters 
had  left,  Mr.  Parkinson  thus  proceeded  to  conclude  his 
letter : — 

"  Doe  dem.  Titmouse  v.  Hoe. 

'  I  enclose  you  Declaration  herein,  served  yesterday.  No 
doubt  it  is  the  disputed  slip  of  waste  land  adjoining  the  cot- 
tage of  old  Jacob  Jolter,  a  tenant  of  Mr.  Aubrey  of  Yatton, 
that  is  sought  to  be  recovered.  I  am  quite  sick  of  this  petty 
annoyance,  as  also  is  Mr.  Aubrey,  who  is  now  down  nere. 
Please  call  on  Messrs.  Quirk,  Gammon,  and  Snap,  of  Saffron 
Hill,  and  settle  the  matter  finally,  on  the  best  terms  you  can ; 
it  being  Mr.  Aubrey's  wish  that  old  Jolter  (who  is  very  feeble 
and  timid)  should  suffer  no  inconvenience.  I  observe  a  new 
lessor  of  the  plaintiff,  with  a  very  singular  name.  I  suppose 
it  is  the  name  of  some  prior  holder  of  the  little  property  at 
present  held  by  Mr.  Tomkins. 

"  Hoping  soon  to  hear  from  you,  (particularly  about  the 
marriage-settlement,)  I  am, 

"  Dear  Sirs, 

"  (With  all  the  compliments  of  the  season,) 
"  Yours  truly, 

JAMES  PARKINSON. 

"  P.  S. — The  oysters  and  codfish  came  to  hand  in  excellent 
order,  for  which  please  accept  my  best  thanks. 
"  I  shall  remit  you  in  a  day  or  two  £100  on  account." 

This  letter,  lying  among  some  twenty  on  thirty  similar 
ones  on  Mr.  Runnington' s  table,  on  the  morning  of  its  arrival 
in  town,  was  opened  in  its  turn ;  and  then,  in  like  manner, 
with  most  of  the  others,  handed  over  to  the  managing  clerk, 
in  order  that  he  might  inquire  into  and  report  upon  the  state 
of  the  various  matters  of  business  referred  to.  As  to  the  last 
item  in  Mr.  Parkinson's  letters,  there  seemed  no  particular 
reason  for  hurrying ;  so  two  or  three  days  had  elapsed  before 
Mr.  Runnington,  haying  some  other  little  business  to  trans- 
act with  Messrs.  Quirk,  Gammon,  and  Snap,  bethought  him- 
self of  looking  at  his  Diary,  to  see  if  there  was  something 
else  that  he  had  to  do  with  them.  Putting,  therefore,  the 
Declaration  in  Doe  d.  Titmouse  v.  lloe  into  his  pocket,  it  was 
not  long  before  he  was  at  the  office  in  Saffron  Hill— and  in 
the  very  room  in  it  which  had  been  the  scene  of  several 
memorable  interviews  between  Mr.  Tittlebat  Titmouse  and 
Messr,;.  Quirk,  Gammon,  and  Snap.  I  shall  not  detail  what 
transpired  on  that  occasion  between  Mr.  Runnington  and 
Messrs.  Quirk  and  Gammon,  with  whom  he  was  closeted 
for  nearly  an  hour.  On  quitting  the  office  his  cheek  was 
flushed,  and  his  manner  somewhat  excited.  After  walk- 
ing a  little  way  in  a  moody  manner,  and  with  a  slow  step,  he 


206  TEN  THOUSAND  A-YEAR. 

suddenly  jumped  into  a  hackney-coach,  within  a  quarter  of 
an  hour's  time  had  secured  an  inside  place  in  the  Tally-ho 
coach,  which  started  for  York  at  two  o'clock  that  afternoon 
— much  doubting  within  himself,  the  while,  whether  he 
ought  not  to  have  set  off  at  once  in  a  post-chaise  and  four. 
He  then  make  one  or  two  calls  in  the  Temple  ;  and,  hurrying 
home  to  the  office,  made  hasty  arrangements  for  his  sudden 
journey  into  Yorkshire.  He  was  a  calm  and  experienced 
man — in  fact,  a  first-rate  man  of  business  and  you  may  be  as- 
sured that  this  rapid  and  decisive  movement  of  his  had  been 
the  result  of  some  very  startling  disclosures  made  to  him  by 
Messrs.  Quirk  and  Gammon. 

Now,  let  us  glide  back  to  the  delightful  solitude  which  we 
reluctantly  quitted  so  short  a  time  ago. 

Mr.  Aubrey  was  a  studious  and  ambitious  man  5  and  in 
acceding  so  readily  to  the  wishes  of  his  wife  and  sister,  to 
spend  the  Christmas  recess  at  Yatton,  had  been  not  a  little 
influenced  by  one  consideration,  which  he  had  not  thought  it 
worth  while  to  mention — namely,  that  it  would  afford  him  an 
opportunity  of  addressing  himself  with  effect  to  a  very  im- 
portant and  complicated  question,  which  was  to  be  brought 
before  the  House  shortly  after  its  re-assembling,  and  of  which 
he  then  knew  scarcely  anything  at  all.  For  this  purpose  he 
had  had  a  quantity  of  Parliamentary  papers,  etc.  etc.  etc. , 
packed  up  and  sent  down  by  coach  ;  and  he  quite  gloated  over 
the  prospect  of  their  being  duly  deposited  upon  his  table,  in 
the  tranquil  leisure  of  his  library,  at  Yatton.  But  quietly  as 
he  supposed  all  this  to  have  been  managed,  Mrs.  Aubrey  and 
Kate  nad  a  most  accurate  knowledge  of  his  movements;  and 
resolved  within  themselves  (being  therein  comforted  and  as- 
sisted by  old  Mrs.  Aubrey),  that,  as  at  their  instances  Mr. 
Aubrey  had  come  down  to  Yatton,  so  they  would  take  care 
that  he  should  have  not  merely  nominal,  but  real  holidays, 
unless  he  thought  fit  to  rise  at  an  early  hour  in  the  morning 
(which  Mrs.  Aubrey,  junior,  took  upon  herself  to  say  she 
would  take  care  should  never  be  the  case),  it  was  decreed 
that  he  should  not  be  allowed  to  waste  more  than  two  hours 
a-day  in  his  library.  'Twas  therefore  in  vain  for  him  to  sit 
at  breakfast  with  an  eve  aslant  and  thought-laden  brow,  as  if 
meditating  a  long  day  s  seclusion ;  somenow  or  another,  he 
never  got  above  an  hour  to  himself.  He  was  often  momen- 
tarily petulant  on  these  occasions,  and  soon  saw  through  the 
designs  of  his  enemies  :  but  he  so  heartily  and  tenderly  loved 
them— so  thoroughly  appreciated  the  affection  which  dictated 
their  little  manoeuvres — that  he  soon  surrendered  at  discre- 
tion, and,  in  fact,  placed  himself  almost  entirely  at  their 
mercy ;  resolving  to  make  up  for  lost  time  on  his  return  to 
town,  and  earnestly  hoping  that  the  interests  of  the  nation 
would  not  suffer  in  the  meanwhile !  In  short,  the  ladies  of 
Yatton  had  agreed  on  their  line  of  operations :  that  almost 
every  night  of  their  stay  in  the  country  should  be  devoted 


THOUSAND  A-TEAE.  20? 

either  to  entertaining  or  visiting  their  neighbors ;  and,  as 
a  preparatory  movement,  that  the  days  (weather  permitting) 
should  be  occupied  with  exercise  in  the  open  air  making 
"  morning  "  calls  on  neighbors  at  several  miles'  distance  from 
the  Hall,  and  from  each  other ;  and  from  which  they  generally 
returned  only  in  time  enough  to  dress  for  dinner.  As  soon, 
indeed,  as  the  York  True  Blue  (the  leading  county  paper) 
had  announced  the  arrival  at  Yatton  of  "  Charles  Aubrey, 
Esq.,  M.  P.,  and  his  family,  for  the  Christmas  recess,"  the 
efforts  of  Mrs.  and  Miss  Aubrey  were  most  powerfully  sec- 
onded by  a  constant  succession  of  visitors — by 

"  Troops  of  friends," 

a,s  the  lodge-keeper  could  have  testified ;  for  he  and  his  buxom 
wife  were  continually  opening  and  shutting  the  great  gates. 
On  the  Monday  after  Cnristmas-day,  (i.  e.  the  day  but  one 
following,)  came  cantering  up  to  the  Hall  Lord  De  La  Zouch 
and  Mr.  Delamere,  of  course  staying  to  luncheon,  and  bear- 
ing a  most  pressing  invitation  from  Lady  De  La  Zpuch,  zeal- 
ously backed  by  themselves,  for  the  Aubreys  to  join  a  large 
party  at  Fotheringham  Castle  on  New-Year's  Eve.  This  was 
accepted — a  day  and  a  night  were  thus  gone  at  a  swoop.  The 
same  thing  happened  with  the  Oldfields,  their  nearest  neigh- 
bors ;  with  Sir  Perciyal  Pickering  at  Luddington  Court,  where 
was  a  superb  new  picture-gallery  to  be  critically  inspected  by 
Mr.  Aubrey;  the  Earl  of  Oldacre,  a  college  friend  of  Mr. 
Aubrey's— the  venerable  Lady  Stratton,  the  earliest  friend 
and  school-fellow  of  old  Mrs.  Aubrey,  and  so  forth.  Then 
Kate  had  several  visits  to  pay  on  her  own  account ;  and, 
being  fond  of  horseback,  she  did  not  like  riding  about  the 
country  with  only  a  groom  in  attendance  on  her  ;  so  her 
brother  must  accompany  her  on  these  occasions.  The  first 
week  of  their  stay  in  the  country  was  devoted  to  visiting 
their  neighbors  and  friends  in  the  way  I  have  stated ;  the  next 
was  to  be  spent  in  receiving  them  at  Yatton,  during  which 
time  the  old  Hall  was  to  ring  with  merry  hospitality. 

Then  there  was  a  little  world  of  other  matters  to  occupy 
Mr  Aubrey's  attention,  and  which  naturally  crowded  upon 
him,  living  so  little  at  Yatton  as  he  had  latterly.  He  often 
had  a  kind  of  levee  of  his  humbler  neighbors,  tenants,  and 
constituents ;  and  on  these  occasions  his  real  goodness  of 
nature,  his  simplicity,  his  patience,  his  forbearance,  his  sweet- 
ness of  temper,  his  benevolence,  shone  conspicuous.  >  With 
all  these  more  endearing  qualities,  there  was  yet  a  placid  dig, 
nity  about  him  that  chilled  undue  familiarity,  and  repelled 
presumption.  He  had  here  no  motive  or  occasion  for  osten- 
tation, or,  as  it  is  called,  popularity-hunting.  In  a  sense  it 
might  be  said  of  him,  that  he  was  monarch  of  all  he  sur- 
veyed." It  is  true,  he  was  member  for  the  borough — an  honor, 
however,  for  which  he  was  indebted  to  the  natural  influence 


208  TEN  THO  US  AND  A-  YEA  K. 

of  his  commanding  position— one  which  left  him  his  own 
master,  not  converting  him  into  a  paltry  delegate,  hand-cuff, 
ed  by  pledges  on  public  questions,  and  laden  with  injunctions 
concerning  petty  local  interests  only— liable,  moreover,  to  be 
called  to  an  account  at  any  moment  by  ignorant  and  insolent 
demagogues— but  a  member  of  Parliament  training  to  become 
a  statesman,  possessed  of  a  free  will,  and  therefore  capable  of 
independent  and  enlightened  deliberations;  placed  by  his 
•  fortune  above  the  reach  of  temptation— but  I  shall  not  go  any 
1  further,  for  the  portraiture  of  a  member  of  Parliament  of 
those  days  suggests  such  a  humiliating  and  bitter  contrast, 
that  I  shall  not  ruffle  either  my  own  or  my  reader's  temper 
by  touching  it  any  further.  On  the  occasions  I  have  been  al- 
luding to,  Mr.  Aubrey  was  not  only  condescending  and  gen- 
erous, "but  practically  acute  and  discriminating  :  qualities  of 
his,  these  latter,  so  well  known,  however,  as  to  leave  him  at 
length  scarce  any  opportunities  of  exercising  them.  His  quiet 
but  decisive  interference  put  an  end  to  a  number  of  local  un- 
pleasantnesses and  annoyances,  and  caused  his  increasing 
absence  from  Yatton  to  be  very  deeply  regretted.  Was  a 
lad  or  a  wench  taking  to  idle  and  dissolute  courses  ?  A  kind, 
or,  as  the  occasion  required,  a  stern  expostulation  of  his — for 
he  was  a  justice  of  the  peace  moreover — brought  them  to 
their  senses.  He  had  a  very  happy  knack  of  reasoning  and 
laughing  quarrelsome  neighbors  into  reconciliation  and  good- 
humor.  He  had  a  very  keen  eye  after  the  practical  details  of 
agriculture ;  was  equally  quick  at  detecting  an  inconvenience, 
and  appreciating  —  sometimes  even  suggesting  —  a  remedy ; 
and  had,  on  several  occasions,  brought  such  knowledge  to 
bear  very  effectively  upon  discussions  in  Parliament.  His 
constituents,  few  in  number  undoubtedly,  and  humble,  were 
quite  satisfied  with  and  proud  of  their  member  ;  and  his  un- 
expected appearance  diffused  among  them  real  and  general 
satisfaction.  As  a  landlord,  he  was  beloved  by  his  numerous 
tenantry ;  and  well  he  might— for  never  was  there  so  easy 
and  liberal  a  landlord :  he  might  at  any  time  have  increased 
his  rental  by  £1500  £2000  a-year,  as  his  steward  frequently 
intimated  to  him — but  in  vain.  "  Ten  thousand  a-year,"  said 
Mr.  Aubrey,  "  is  far  more  than  my  necessities  require— it  af- 
fords me  and  my  family  every  luxury  that  I  can  conceive  of ; 
and  its  magnitude  reminds  me  constantly  that  hereafter  I 
shall  be  called  upon  to  give  a  very  strict  and  solemn  account 
of  my  stewardship."  I  would  I  had  time  to  complete,  as  it 
ought  to  be  completed,  this  portraiture  of  a  true  Christian 
gentleman ! 

As  he  rode  up  to  the  Hare  and  Hounds  Inn,  at  Grilston, 
one  morning,  to  transact  some  little  business,  and  also  to 
look  in  on  the  Farmers'  Club,  which  was  then  holding  one 
of  its  fortnightly  meetings,  (all  touching  their  hats  and  bow- 
ing to  him  on  each  side  of  the  long  street  as  he  slowly  passr 
ed  up  it,)  he  perceived  one  of  his  horse's  feet  limp  a  little, 


TEN  THOUSAND  A-TEAE.  209 

On  dismounting,  therefore,  he  stopped  to  see  what  was  the 
matter,  while  the  groom  took  up  the  foot  to  examine  it. 

"Dey-vilish  fine  horse !  "  exclaimed  the  voice  of  one  stand- 
ing close  beside  him,  and  in  a  tone  of  most  disagreeable  con- 
fidence. The  exclamation  was  addressed  to  Mr.  Aubrey ; 
who,  on  turning  to  the  speaker,  beheld  a  young  man—  'twas 
Titmouse— dressed  in  a  style  of  the  most  extravagant  ab- 
surdity. One  hand  was  stuck  into  the  hinder  pocket  of  a 
stylish  top-coat,  (the  everlasting  tip  of  a  white  pocket-hand- 
kerchief glistening  at  the  mouth, of  his  breast-pocket ;)  and 
the  other  held  a  cegar  in  his  mouth  from  which,  as  he  address 
ed  Mr.  Aubrey  with  an  air  of  signal  assurance,  he  slowly  ex- 
pelled the  smoke  that  he  had  inhaled.  Mr.  Aubrey  turned 
towards  him  with  a  cold  and  surprised  air,  without  replying, 
at  the  same  time  wondering  where  he  had  seen  the  ridicu- 
lous object  before. 

"  The  horses  in  these  parts  ar'n't  to  be  compared  with  them 
at  London — eh,  sir  ? '  quoth  Titmouse,  approaching  closer  to 
Mr.  Aubrey  and  his  groom,  to  see  what  the  latter  was  doing 
—who,  on  hearing  Titmouse's  last  sally,  gave  him  a  very  sig- 
nificant look. 

"  I'm  afraid  the  people  here  won't  relish  your  remarks, 
sir !  "  replied  Mr.  Aubrey,  hardly  able  to  forbear  a  smile,  at 
the  same  time  with  an  astonished  air  scanning  the  figure  of 
his  companion  from  head  to  foot. 

"Who  cares?"  inquired  Titmouse,  with  a  very  energetic 
oath.  At  this  moment  up  came  a  farmer,  who,  observing 
Mr.  Aubrey,  made  him  a  very  low  bow.  Mr.  Aubrey's  at- 
tention being  at  the  moment  occupied  with  Titmouse,  he  did 
not  9bserve  the  salutation  ;  not  so  with  Titmouse,  who,  con- 
ceiving it  to  have  been  directed  to  himself,  acknowledged  it 
by  taking  off  his  hat  with  great  grace !  Mr  Aubrey  followed 
in  to  the  house,  haying  ordered  his  groom  to  bring  back  the 
horse  in  an  hour's  time. 

"  Pray,"  said  he  mildly  io  the  landlady,  "  who  is  the  per- 
son smoking  the  cigar  outside  ?  " 

"Why,  sir,"  she  replied,  "  he's  a  Mr.  Brown  ;  and  has  an- 
other with  him  here— who's  going  up  to  London  by  this  after- 
noon's coach— this  one  stays  behind  a  day  or  two  longer. 
They're  queer  people,  sir.  Such  dandies !  Do  nothing  but 
smoke,  and  drink  brandy  and  water,  sir ;  only  that  t'other 
writes  a  good  deal." 

"Well,  I  wish  you  would  remind  him,"  said  Mr.  Aubrey, 
smiling  "  that,  if  he  thinks  fit  to  speak  to  me  again,  or  in  my 
presence,  I  am  a  magistrate,  and  have  the  power  of  fining  him 
five  shillings  for  every  oath  he  utters." 

"  What !  sir,  has  he  been  speaking  to  you  f  Well,  I  never 
— he's_the  most  forward  little  upstart  I  ever  seed !  "  said  she, 
dropping  her  voice ;  "  and  the  sooner  he  takes  himself  off 
from  here  the  better ;  for  he's  always  winking  at  the  maids 
and  talking  impudence  to  them.  I'se  box  his  ears,  I  war- ; 


210  TEN  THOUSAND  A-YEAE. 

rant  him,  one  of  these  times !  "  Mr.  Aubrey  smiled  and  went 
upstairs. 

"  There  don't  seem  much  wrong,"  quoth  Titmouse  to  the 
groom,  with  a  condescending  air,  as  soon  as  Mr.  Aubrey  had 
entered  the  house. 

"  Much  you  know  about  it,  I  don't  guess !  quoth  Sam, 
with  a  contemptuous  smile. 

"Who's  your  master,  fel^w?"  inquired  Titmouse,  knock- 
ing  off  the  ashes  from  the  tip  of  his  cigar. 

"  A  gentleman.    "What's  yours  ?  " 

"  Curse  your  impudence,  you  vagabond The  words 

were  hardly  out  of  his  mouth  before  Sam,  with  a  slight  tap 
of  his  hand,  had  knocked  Titmouse's  glossy  hat  off  his  head, 
and  Titmouse's  purple-hued  hair  stood  exposed  to  view,  pro- 
voking the  jeers  and  laughter  9f  one  or  two  bystanders.  Tit- 
mouse appeared  about  to  strike  the  groom  ;  who,  hastily 
giving  the  bridles  of  his  horses  into  the  hands  of  an  ostler, 
threw  himself  into  boxing  attitude ;  and,  being  a  clean,  tight- 
built  stout  young  fellow,  looked  a  very  formidable  object,  as 
he  came  squaring  nearer  and  nearer  to  the  dismayed  Tit- 
mouse; and  on  behalf  of  the  outraged  honor  of  all  the  horses 
of  Yorkshire,  was  just  going  to  let  fly  his  one-two,  when  a 
sharp  tapping  at  the  bow-window  overhead  startled  him  for 
a  moment,  interrupting  his  warlike  demonstrations :  and, 
on  casting  up  his  eyes,  he  beheld  the  threatening  figure  of 
his  master,  who  was  shaking  his  whip  at  him.  He  dropped  his 
guard,  touched  his  hat  very  humbly,  and  resumed  his  horses' 
bridles ;  muttering,  however,  to  Titmouse,  "  If  thou'rt  a 
man  come  down  into  t'  yard,  and  I'll  mak  thee  think  a  horse 
kicked  thee,  a  liar  as  thou  art!  " 

"Who's  that  gentleman  gone  upstairs?''  inquired  Tit- 
mouse of  the  landlady,  after  ne  had  sneaked  into  the  inn. 

"  Squire  Aubrey  of  Yatton,"  she  replied  tartly.  Titmouse's 
face  previously  very  pale,  flushed  all  over,  "  Ay,  ay,"  she 
continued  sharply—"  thou  must  be  chattering  to  the  grand 
folks,  and  thou  st  nearly  put  thy  foot  into 't  at  last,  I  can  tell 
thee ;  for  that's  a  magistrate,  and  thou'st  been  a-s wearing 
afore  him."  Titmouse  smiled  rather  faintly ;  and  entering 
the  parlor,  affected  to  be  engaged  with  a  county  newspaper  ; 
and  ne  remained  very  quiet  for  upwards  of  an  hour,  not  ven- 
turing out  of  the  room  till  he  had  seen  off  Mr.  Aubrey  and 
his  formidable  Sam. 

It  was  the  hunting  season  ;  but  Mr.  Aubrey,  though  he 
had  as  fine  horses  as  were  to  be  found  in  the  county,  and 
which  were  always  at  the  service  of  his  friends,  partly 
from  want  of  inclination  and  partly  from  the  delicacy 
of  his  constitution,  never  shared  in  the  sports  of  the  field.. 
Now  and  then,  however,  he  rode  to  cover,  to  see  the  hounds 
throw  off,  and  exchange  greetings  with  a  great  number 
of  his  friends  and  neighbors,  on  such  occasions  collected 
together.  This  he  did  the  morning  after  that  on  which 


TEN  THOUSAND  A-TEAR.  211 

he  had  visited  Grilston,  accompanied,  at  their  earnest 
entreaty,  by  Mrs.  Aubrey  and  Kate.  I  am  not  painting 
angels,  but  describing  frail  human  nature ;  and  truth  forces 
me  to  say,  that  Kate  knew  pretty  well  that  on  such  occa- 
sions she  appeared  to  no  little  advantage.  I  protest  I  love  her 
not  the  less  for  it — but  is  there  a  beautiful  woman  under  the 
the  sun  who  is  not  aware  of  her  charms,  and  of  the  effect 
they  produce  upon  our  sex  ?  Pooh  !  I  never  will  believe  to 
the  contrary.  In  Kate's  composition  this  ingredient  was  but 
an  imperceptible  alloy  in  virgin  gold.  Now,  how  was  it  that 
she  came  to  think  of  this  hunting  appointment  ?  I  do  not 
exactly  know ;  but  I  recollect  that  when  Lord  De  la  Zouch 
last  called  at  Yatton,  he  happened  to  mention  it  at  lunch, 

and  to  say  that  he  and  one  Geoffry  Lovel  Delamere but 

however  that  may  be,  behold  on  a  bright  Thursday  morning, 
Aubrey  and  his  two  lovely  companions  made  their  welcome 
appearance  at  the  field,  all  suberbly  mounted,  and  most  cor- 
dially greeted  by  all  present.  Miss  Aubrey  attracted  uni- 
versal admiration ;  but  there  was  one  handsome  youngster, 
his  well-formed  figure  showing  to  great  advantage  in  his 
new  pink  and  leathers  that  made  a  point  of  challenging  her 
special  notice,  and  in  doing  so,  attracting  that  of  all  his  en- 
vious fell-sportsmen  ;  and  that  was  Delamere.  He  seemed, 
infinitely  more  taken  up  with  the  little  party  from  Yatton 
than  with  the  serious  business  of  the  day.  His  horse,  how- 
ever, had  an  eye  to  business ;  and  with  erected  ears,  catching 
the  first  welcome  signal  sooner  than  its  gallant  rider,  sprung 
off  like  light,  and  would  have  left  its  abstracted  rider  behind 
had  he  not  been  a  first  rate  seat.  In  fact,  Kate  herself  was 
not  quiet  sufficiently  on  her  guard  ;  and  her  eager  filly  sud- 
denly put  in  requisition  all  her  rider's  little  strength  and 
skill  to  rein  her  in— which  having  done,  Kate's  eye  looked 
rather  anxiously  after  her  late  companion,  who,^  however, 
had  already  cleared  the  first  hedge,  and  was  fast  making  up 
to  the  scattering  scarlet  crowd.  Oh,  the  bright  exhilarat- 
ing scene ! 

"  Heigh  ho ! "  said  Kate,  with  a  slight  sigh,  as  soon  as  Dela- 
mere had  disappeared—"  I  was  very  nearly  off." 

"  So  was  somebody  else !  Kate  !  "  said  Mrs.  Aubrey,  with 
a  sly  smile. 

"This  is  a  very  cool  contrivance  of  yours,  Kate,— bringing 
us  here  this  morning,"  said  her  brother,  rather  gravely. 

"  What  do  you  mean,  Charles?  "  she  inquired,  slightly  red- 
dening. He  good-naturedly  hit  her  shoulder  with  his  whip, 
laughed,  urged  his  horse  into  a  canter,  and  they  were  all  soon 
on  their  way  to  General  Grim's,  an  old  friend  of  the  late  Mr. 
Aubrey's. 

The  party  assembled  on  New- Year's  eve  at  Fotheringham 
Castle,  the  magnificent  residence  of  Lord  De  la  Zouch,  was 
numerous  and  brilliant.  The  Aubreys  arrived  about  five 
o'clock;  and  on  their  emerging  from  their  chambers  into 


212  TEN  THOUSAND  A-YEAE. 

the  drawing-room,  about  half-past  six— Mr.  Aubrey  lead, 
ing  in  his  lovely  wife  and  his  very  beautiful  sister— 
they  attracted  general  attention.  He  himself  looked  hand- 
some, for  the  orisk  country  air  had  brought  out  a  glow 
upon  his  too  frequently  sallow  countenance — sallow  with 
the  unwholesome  atmosphere,  the  late  hours,  the  wasting 
excitement  of  the  House  of  Commons ;  and  his  smile  was 
cheerful,  his  eye  bright  and  penetrating.  There  is  nothing 
that  makes  such  quick  triumphant  way  in  English  society 
as  the  promise  of  speedy  political  distinction.  It  will  supply 
to  its  nappy  possessor  the  want  of  family  and  fortune — it 
rapidly  melts  away  all  distinctions  ;  the  obscure  but  eloquent 
commoner  finds  himself  suddenly  standing  in  the  rarefied 
atmosphere  of  privilege  arid  exclusiveness — the  familiar 
equal,  often  the  conscious  superior,  of  the  haughtiest  peer  of 
the  realm.  A  single  successful  speech  in  the  House  of  Com- 
mons opens  before  its  utterer  the  shining  doors  of  fashion 
and  greatness,  as  if  by  magic.  It  is  as  it  were  POWER  step- 
ping into  its  palace,  welcomed  by  gay  crowds  of  eager  ob- 
sequious expectants.  Who  would  not  press  forward  to  grasp 
in  anxious  welcome  the  hand  that,  in  a  few  short  years,  may 
dispense  the  glittering  baubles  sighed  after  by  the  great,  and 
the  more  substantial  patronage  of  office,  which  may  point 
public  opinion  in  any  direction  ?  But,  to  go  no  further,  what 
if  to  all  this  be  added  a  previous  position  in  society,  such  as 
that  occupied  by  Mr.  Aubrey !  There  were  several  very  fine 
women,  married  and  single,  in  that  splendid  drawing-room  ; 
but  there  were  two  girls,  in  very  different  styles  of  beauty, 
who  were  soon  allowed  by  all  present  to  carry  off  the  palm 
between  them — I  mean  Miss  Aubrey  and  Lady  Caroline 
Caversham,  the  only  daughter  of  the  Marchioness  of  Red- 
borough,  both  of  whom  were  on  a  visit  at  the  castle  of  some 
duration.  Lady  Caroline  and  Miss  Aubrey  were  of  about  the 
same  age,  and  dressed  almost  exactly  alike,  viz.  in  white 
satin ;  only  Lady  Caroline  wore  a  brilliant  diamond  necklace, 
whereas  Kate  had  chosen  to  wear  not  a  single  ornament. 

Lady  Caroline  was  a  trifle  the  taller,  and  had  a  very  stately 
carriage.  Her  hair  was  black  as  jet — her  features  were  re- 
fined and  delicate ;  but  they  wore  a  very  cold,  haughty  ex- 
pression. After  a  glance  at  her  half-closed  eyes,  and  the 
swan-like  curve  of  her  snowy  neck,  you  unconsciously  with- 
drew from  her,  as  from  an  inaccessible  beauty.  The  more 
you  looked  at  her,  the  more  she  satisfied  your  critical  scru- 
tiny ;  but  your  feelings  went  not  out  towards  her — they  were, 
in  a  manner,  chilled  and  repulsed.  Look,  now,  at  our  own 
Kate  Aubrey— nay,  never  fear  to  place  her  beside  yon  super- 
cilious divinity— look  at  her,  and  your  heart  acknowledges 
her  loveliness  ;  your  soul  thrills  at  sight  of  her  bewitching 
blue  eyes— eyes  now  sparkling  with  excitement,  then  lan- 
guishing with  softness,  in  accordance  with  the  varying  emo- 
tions of  a  sensitive  nature— a  most  susceptible  heart.  How 


TEN  THOUSAND  A-YEAE.  213 

ner  sunny  curls  harmonize  with  the  delicacy  and  richness  of 
her  complexion !  Her  figure,  observe,  is,  of  the  two,  a  trifle 
fuller  than  her  rival's — stay,  don't  let  your  admiring  eyes 
settle  so  intently  upon  her  budding  form,  or  you  will  confuse 
Kate — turn  away,  or  she  will  shrink  from  you  like  the  sensi- 
tive plant !  Lady  Caroline  seems  the  exquisite  but  frigid 
production  of  a  skilful  statuary,  who  had  caught  a  divinity 
in  the  very  act  of  disdainfully  setting  her  foot  for  the  first 
time  upon  this  poor  earth  of  ours  ;  but  Kate  is  a  living  and 
breathing  beauty— as  it  were,  fresh  from  the  hand  of  God 
himself ! 

Kate  was  very  affectionately  greeted  by  Lady  De  la  Zouch, 
a  lofty  and  dignified  woman  of  about  fifty ;  so  also  by  Lord 
De  la  Zouch ;  but  when  young  Delamere  welcomed  her  with 
a  palpable  embarrassment  of  manner,  a  more  brilliant  color 
stole  into  her  cheek,  and  a  keen  observer  might  have  noticed 
a  little,  rapid,  undulating  motion  in  her  bosom,  which  told  of 
some  inward  emotion.  And  a  keen  observer  Kate  at  that 
moment  had  in  her  beautiful  rival ;  from  whose  cheek,  as 
that  of  Kate  deepened  in  its  roseate  bloom,  faded  away  the 
color  entirely,  leaving  it  the  hue  of  the  lily.  Her  drooping 
eyelids  could  scarcely  conceal  the  glances  of  alarm  and  an- 
ger which  she  darted  at  her  plainly  successful  rival  in  the 
affections  of  the  future  Lord  De  la  Zouch.  Kate  was  quickly 
aware  of  this  state  of  matters  ;  and  it  required  no  little  self- 
control  to  appear  wrauyare  of  it.  Delamere  took  her  down  to 
dinner,  and  seated  himself  beside  her,  and  paid  her  such 
pointed  attentions  as  at  length  really  distressed  her ;  and  she 
was  quite  relieved  when  the  time  came  for  the  ladies  to  with- 
draw. That  she  had  not  a  secret  yearning  towards  Delamere, 
the  frequent  companion  of  her  early  days,  I  cannot  assert, 
because  I  know  it  would  be  contrary  to  the  fact.  Circum- 
stances had  kept  him  on  the  Continent  for  more  than  a  year 
between  the  period  of  his  quitting  Eton  and  going  to  Oxford, 
where  another  twelvemonth  had  slipped  away  without  his 
visiting  Yorkshire :  thus  two  years  had  elapsed — and  behold 
Kate  had  become  a  woman,  and  he  a  man  !  They  had  mutual 
predispositions  towards  each  other,  and  'twas  mere  accident 
.  which  of  them  first  manifested  symptoms  of  fondness  for  the 
I  other — the  same  result  must  have  followed,  namely,  (to  use 
a  great  word,)  reciprocation.  Lord  and  Lady  De  la  Zouch 
idolized  their  son,  and  were  old  and  very  firm  friends  of  the 
Aubrey  family ;  and,  if  Delamere  really  formed  an  attach- 
ment to  one  "of  Miss  Aubrey's  beauty,  accomplishments, 
talent,  amiability,  and  ancient  family — why  should  he  not  be 
gratified  ?  Kate,  whether  she  would  or  not,  was  set  down  to 
the  piano,  Lady  Caroline  accompanying  her  on  the  harp — on 
which  she  usually  performed  with  mingled  skill  and  grace  • 
but  on  the  present  occasion,  both  the  fair  performers  found 
fault  with  their  instruments — then  with  themselves — and 
presently  gave  up  the  attempt  in  despair.  But  when,  at  a 


214  TEN  THOUSAND  A-YEAE. 

later  period  of  the  evening,  Kate's  spirits  had  been  a  little  ex. 
hilarated  with  dancing,  and  she  sat  down,  at  Lord  De  la 
Zouch  s  request,  and  gave  that  exquisite  song  from  the  Tem- 
pest,—" Where  the  bee  sucks,"— all  the  witchery  of  her  voice 
and  manner  had  returned ;  and  as  for  Delamere,  he  would 
have  given  the  world  to  marry  her  that  minute,  and  so  for- 
ever  extinguish  the  hopes  of— as  he  imagined— two  or  three 
nascent  competitors  for  the  beautiful  prize  then  present. 
i  That  Kate  was  good  as  beautiful,  the  following  little  inci- 
dent, which  happened  to  her  on  the  ensuing  evening,will  show. 
There  was  a  girl  in  the  village  at  Yattpn,  about  sixteen  or 
seventeen  years  old,  called  Phoebe  "Williams  ;  a  very  pretty 
girl,  and  who  had  spent  about  two  years  at  the  Hall  as  a 
laundry-maid,  but  had  been  obliged,  some  few  months  before 
the  time!  am  speaking  of,  to  return  to  her  parents  in  the 
village,  ill  of  a  decline.  She  had  been  a  sweet-tempered  girl 
in  her  situation,  and  all  her  fellow-servants  felt  great 
interest  in  her,  as  also  did  Miss  Aubrey.  Mrs.  Aubrey  sent 
her  daily,  jellies,  sago,  and  other  such  matters,  suitable  for 
the  poor  girl's  condition;  and  about  a  quarter-of-an-hour 
after  her  return  from  Fotheringham,  Miss  Aubrey,  finding 
one  of  the  female  servants  about  to  set  off  with  some  of  the 
above-mentioned  articles,  and  hearing  that  poor  Phoebe  was 

Getting  rapidly  worse,  instead  of  retiring  to  her  room  to  un- 
ress,  slipped  on  an  additional  shawl,  and  resolved  to 
accompany  the  servant  to  the  village.  She  said  not  a  word 
to  either  her  mother,  her  sister-in-law,  or  her  brother ;  but 
simply  left  word  with  her  maid  where  she  was  going,  and 
that  she  should  quickly  return.  It  was  snowing  smartly 
when  Kate  set  off ;  but  she  cared  not,  hurried  on  by  the  im- 
pulse of  kindness,  which  led  her  to  pay  perhaps  a  last  visit 
to  the  humble  sufferer.  She  walked  alongside  of  the 
elderly  female  servant,  asking  her  a  number  of  questions 
about  Phoebe,  and  her  sorrowing  father  and  mother.  It  was 
nearly  dark  as  they  quitted  the  Park  gates,  and  snowing,  if 
anything,  faster  than  when  they  had  left  the  Hall.  Kate, 
wrapping  her  shawl  still  closer  round  her  slender  figure,  and 
her  face  pretty  well  protected  by  her  veil,  hurried  on,  and 
they  soon  reached  Williams'  cottage.  Its  humble  tenants 
were,  as  may  be  imagined,  not  a  little  surprised  at  her 
appearance  at  such  an  hour,  and  in  such  inclement  weather, 
and  so  apparently  unattended.  Poor  Phoebe,  worn  to  a 
shadow,  was  sitting  opposite  the  fire,  in  a  little  wooden  arm- 
chair, and  propped  up  by  a  pillow.  She  trembled,  and  her 
lips  moved  on  seeing  Miss  Aubrey,  who  sitting  down  on  a 
stool  beside  her,  after  laying  aside  her  snow-whitened  shawl 
and  bonnet,  spoke  to  her  in  the  most  gentle  and  soothing 
strain  imaginable.  What  a  contrast  in  their  two  figures ! 
'T would  have  been  no  violent  stretch  of  imagination  to  say, 
that  Catherine  Aubrey  at  that  moment  looked  like  a 
ministering  angel  sent  to  comfort  the  wretched  sufferer  in 


TUN  THOUSAND  A-YEAR.  215 

fier  extremity.  Phoebe's  father  and  mother  stood  on  each 
side  of  the  little  fireplace,  gazing  with  tearful  eyes  upon  their 
only  child,  soon  about  to  depart  from  them  forever.  The 
poor  girl  was  indeed  a  touching  object.  She  had  been 
very  pretty,  but  now  her  face  was  white  and  woefully 
emaciated— the  dread  impress  of  consumption  was  upon  it. 
Her  wasted,  fingers  were  clasped  together  on  her  lap,  hold- 
ing between  them  a  little  handkerchief,  with  which,  evi- 
dently with  great  effort,  she  occasionally  wiped  the  damp- 
ness from  her  face. 

"  You're  very  good,  ma'am,  "  she  whispered,  "  to  come  to 
see  me,  and  so  late.  They  say  it's  a  sad,  cold  night." 

"  I  heard,  Phoebe,  that  you  were  not  so  well,  and  I  thought 
I  would  just  step  along  with  Margaret,  who  has  brought  you 
some  more  jelly.  Did  you  like  the  last?" 

"  Y-e-s,  ma'am,"  she  replied,  hesitatingly  ;  "  but  it's  very 
hard  for  me  to  swallow  anything  now,  my  throat  feels  so 
sore."  Here  her  mother  shook  her  head  and  looked  aside  ; 
for  the  doctor  had  only  that  morning  explained  to  her  the 
nature  of  the  distressing  symptom  which  her  daughter  was 
alluding  to— as  evidencing  the  very  last  stage  of  her  fatal 
disorder. 

"  I'm  very  sorry  to  hear  you  say  so,  Phcebe,"  replied  Miss 
Aubrey.  '"'Do  you  think  there's  anything  else  that  Mrs. 
Jackson  could  make  for  you  ?  " 

"  No,  ma'am,  thank  you ;  I  feel  it's  no  use  trying  to  swal- 
low anything  more." 

"  While  there's  life,"  said  Kate,  in  a  subdued,  hesitating 
tone,  "there's  hope— they  say."  Phoebe  shook  her  head 
mournfully.  "  Don't  stop  long,  dear  lady— it's  getting  very 
late  for  you  to  be  out  alone.  Father  will  go " 

"Never  mind  me,  Phcebe— I  can  take  care  of  myself.  I 
hope  you  mind  wnat  good  Dr.  Tatham  says  to  you  ?  You 
know  this  sickness  is  from  God,  Phoebe.  He  knows  what  is 
best  for  his  creatures." 

"  Thank  God,  ma'am,  I  think  I  feel  resigned.  I  know  it 
is  God's  will ;  but  I  am  very  sorry  for  poor  father  and  mother 
—they'll  be  so  lone  like  when  they  don't  see  Phoebe  about." 
Her  father  gazed  intently  at  her,  and  the  tears  ran  trickling 
down  his  cheeks ;  her  mother  put  her  apron  before  her  face, 
and  shook  her  head  in  silent  anguish.  Miss  Aubrey  did  not 
speak  for  a  few  moments.  "  I  see  you  have  been  reading 
the  prayer-book  mamma  gave  you  when  you  were  at  the 
Hall,"  said  she  at  length,  observing  the  little  volume  lying 
open  on  Phoebe's  lap. 

"  Yas,  ma'am — I  was  trying  ;  but  somehow,  lately.  I  can't 
read,  for  there's  a  kind  of  mist  comes  over  my  eyes,  and  I 
can't  see." 

"  That's  weakness,  Phoebe,"  said  Miss  Aubrey,  quickly  but 
tremulously. 

"  May  I  make  bold,  ma'am,"  commenced  Phcebe  languidly, 


;il6  TEN  THOUSAND  A-YEAK. 

after  a  hesitating  pause,  "  to  ask  you  to  read  the  little  psalm 
I  was  trying  to  read  i  while  ago?  I  should  so  like  to  hear 
you?' 

"I'll  try,  PhcBbe,"  said  Miss  Aubrey,  taking  the  book, 
which  was  open  at  the  sixth  psalm.  Twas  a  severe  trial, 
for  her  feelings  were  not  a  little  excited  already.  But  how 
could  she  refuse  the  dying  girl?  So  she  began,  a  little 
i  indistinctly,  in  a  very  low  tone,  and  with  frequent  pauses  ; 
for  the  tears  every  now  and  then  quite  obscured  her  sight. 
She  managed,  however,  to  get  as  far  as  the  sixth  verse, 
which  was  thus : 

"  2  am  weary  of  my  groaning  ;  every  night  wash  I  my  bed, 
and  water  my  couch  with  tears  ;  my  beauty  is  gone  for  very 
trouble?' 

Here  Kate's  voice  suddenly  stopped.  She  buried  her  face 
for  a  moment  or  two  in  her  handkerchief,  and  said  hastily. 
"  I  can't  read  any  more,  Phoebe ! '  Every  one  in  the  little 
room  was  in  tears,  except  poor  Phcebe,  who  seemed  past  that. 

"  It's  time  for  me  to  go,  now,  Phcebe.  We'll  send  some 
one  early  in  the  morning  to  know  how  you  are,"  said  Miss 
Aubrey,  rising  and  putting  on  her  bonnet  and  shawl.  She 
contrived  to  beckon  Phoebe's  mother  to  the  back  of  the 
room,  and  silently  slipped  a  couple  of  guineas  into  her 
hands;  for  she  knew  the  mournful  occasion  there  would  soon 
be  for  such  assistance !  She  then  left,  peremptorily  declin- 
ing the  attendance  of  Phoebe's  father — saying  that  it  must 
be  dark  when  she  could  not  find  the  way  to  the  Hall,  which 
was  almost  in  a  straight  line  from  the  cottage,  and  a  little 
more  than  a  quarter  of  a  mile  off.  It  ^ras  very  much  darker, 
and  it  still  snowed,  though  not  so  thickly  as  when  she  had 
come.  She  and  Margaret  walked  side  by  side,  at  a  quick 
pace,  talking  together  about  poor  Phcebe.  Just  as  she  was 
approaching  the  extremity  of  the  village,  nearest  the  park— 

"  Ah,  my  lovely  gals !  exclaimed  a  voice,  in  a  low  but 

most  offensive  tone—"  alone  ?  How  uncommon "  Miss 

Aubrey  for  a  moment  seemed  thunderstruck  at  so  sudden 
and  unprecedented  an  occurrence ;  then  she  hurried  on  with 
a  beating  heart,  whispering  to  Margaret  to  keep  close  to  her, 
1  and  not  to  be  alarmed.  The  speaker,  however,  kept  pace 
with  them. 

"  Lovely  gals !— wish  I'd  an  umbrella,  my  angels !— Take 
my  arm  ?  Ah !  Pretty  gals !  " 

"  Who  are  you,  sir  ?  "  at  length  exclaimed  Kate,  spiritedly, 
suddenly  stopping,  and  turning  to  the  rude  speaker. 

[Who  else  should  it  be  but  Tittlebat  Titmouse  !]  "  Who 
am  I  ?  Ah,  ha !  Lovely  gals !  one  that  loves  the  pretty  gals." 

"  Do  you  know,  fellow,  who  I  am  ?  "  inquired  Miss  Aubrey 
indignantly,  flinging  aside  her  veil,  and  disclosing  her  beau- 
tiful face,  white  as  death,  but  indistinctly  visible  in  the 
darkness,  to  her  insolent  assailant. 

"  No,  'pon  my  soul,  no ;  but— lovely  gal !  lovely  gal !— 'pon. 


TEN  THOUSAND  A-YEAR.  217 

my  life,  spirited  gal !— do  you  no  harm !    Take  my  arm  ? " 

u  Wretch !  ruffian !  How  dare  you  insult  a  lady  in  this 
manner  ?  Do  you  know  who  I  am  ?  My  name,  sir,  is  Aubrey 

—I  am  Miss  Aubrey  of  the  Hall !  Do  not  think " 

Titmouse  felt  as  if  he  were  on  the  point  of  dropping  down 
dead  at  that  moment,  with  amazement  and  terror ;  and  when 
Miss  Aubrey's  servant  screamed  out  at  the  top  of  her  voice, 
"  Help !— help,  there  ! "  Titmouse,  without  uttering  a  syllable 
more,  took  to  his  heels,  just  as  the  door  of  a  cottage,  at  only 
a  few  yards'  distance,  opened,  and  out  rushed  a  strapping 
farmer,  shouting— "  Hey !  what  be  t'matter?"  You  may 
guess  his  astonisnment  on  discovering  Miss  Aubrey,  and  his 
fury  at  learning  the  cause  of  her  alarm.  Out  of  doors  he 
pelted,  without  his  hat,  uttering  a  volley  of  fearful  impreca- 
tions, and  calling  on  the  unseen  miscreant  to  come  forward ; 
for  whom  it  was  lucky  that  he  had  time  to  escape  from  a 
pair  of  fists  that  in  a  minute  or  two  would  have  beaten  his 
little  carcass  into  a  jelly !  Miss  Aubrey  was  so  overcome  by 
the  shock  she  had  suffered,  that  but  for  a  glass  of  water  she 
might  have  fainted.  As  soon  as  she  had  a  little  recovered 
from  her  agitation,  she  set  off  home,  accompanied  by  Mar- 
garet, and  followed  very  closely  by  the  tanner,  with  a 
tremendous  knotted  stick  under  his  arm — (he  wanted  to  have 
taken  his  double-barrelled  gun) — and  thus  she  soon  reached 
the  Hall,  not  a  little  tired  and  agitated.  This  little  incident, 
however,  she  kept  to  herself,  and  enjoined  her  two  attendants 
to  do  the  same  ;  for  she  knew  the  distress  it  would  have  oc- 
casioned those  whom  she  loved.  As  it  was,  she  was  some- 
what sharply  rebuked  by  her  mother  and  brother  who  had 
just  sent  two  men  out  in  quest  of  her,  and  whom  it  was  sin- 
gular that  she  should  have  missed.  This  is  not  the  place  to 
give  an  account  of  the  eccentric  movements  of  our  friend 
Titmouse  ;  still  there  can  be  no  harm  in  my  just  mentioning 
that  the  sight  of  Miss  Aubrey  on  horseback  had  half  mad- 
dened the  little  fool ;  her  image  had  never  been  effaced  from 
his  memory  since  the  occasion  on  which,  as  already  explain- 
ed, he  had  first  seen  her ;  and  as  soon  as  he  had  ascertained, 
through  Snap's  inquiries,  who  she  was,  he  became  more 
frenzied  in  the  matter  than  before,  because  he  thought  he 
now  saw  a  probability  of  obtaining  her.  "  If  like  children," 
says  Edmund  Burke,  "  we  will  cry  for  the  moon,  why  like 
children  we  must — cry  on"  Whether  this  was  not  some- 
thing like  the  position  of  Mr.  Tittlebat  Titmouse,  in  his 
passion  for  CATHARINE  AUBREY,  the  reader  can  judge.  He 
had  unbosomed  himself  in  the  matter  to  his  confidential 
adviser  Mr.  Snap ;  who,  having  accomplished  his  errand,  had 
the  day  before  returned  to  town,  very  much  against  his  will, 
leaving  Titmouse  behind  him,  to  bring  about,  by  his  own 
delicate  and  skilful  management,  a  union  between  himself, 
as  the  future  lord  of  Yatton,  and  the  beautiful  sister  of  its 
present  occupant. 


TEN  THOUSAND  A-YEAB- 


CHAPTER  IX. 

MB.  AUBREY  and  Kate  \yere  sitting  together  playing  at 
chess,  about  eight  o'clock  in  the  evening ;  Dr.  Tatham  and 
Mrs.  Aubrey,  junior,  looking  on  with  much  interest;  old 
Mrs.  Aubrey  being  busily  engaged  writing.  Mr.  Aubrey  was 
sadly  an  overmatch  for  poor  Kate— he  being  in  fact  a  first- 
rate  player;  and  her  soft  white  hand  had  been  hovering 
over  the  half-dozen  chessmen  she  had  left,  uncertain  which 
of  them  to  move,  for  nearly  two  minutes,  her  chin  resting  on 
the  other  hand,  and  her  face  wearing  a  very  puzzled  expres- 
si9n.  "  Come,  Kate,"  said  every  now  and  then  her  brother, 
with  that  calm  victorious  smile  which  at  such  a  moment 
would  have  tried  any  but  so  sweet  a  temper  as  his  sister's. 
"  If  I  were  you,  Miss  Aubrey,"  was  perpetually  exclaiming 
Dr.  Tatham,  knowing  as  much  about  the  game  the  while  as 
the  little  Marlborough  spaniel  lying  asleep  at  Miss  Aubrey's 
feet.  "  Oh  dear ! "  said  Kate,  at  length,  with  a  sigh, "  I  really 
don't  see  how  to  escape 

"  Who  can  that  be  ?  "  exclaimed  Mrs.  Aubrey,  looking  up 
and  listening  to  the  sound  of  carriage  wheels. 

"  Never  mind,"  said  her  husband,  who  was  interested  in 
the  game—"  come,  come,  Kate."  A  few  minutes  afterwards 
a  servant  made  his  appearance,  and  coming  up  to  Mr.  Aubrey, 
told  him  that  Mr.  Parkinson  and  another  gentleman  had 
called,  and  were  waiting  in  the  library  to  speak  to  him  on 
business. 

"  What  can  they  want  at  this  hour  ? "  exclaimed  Mr. 
Aubrey  absently,  intently  watching  an  expected  move  of  his 
sister's,  which  would  have  decided  the  game.  At  length  she 
made  her  long-meditated  descent,  in  quite  an  unexpected 
quarter. 

"  Checkmate !  "  she  exclaimed  with  infinite  glee. 

"  Ah ! "  cried  he,  rising,  with  a  slightly  surprised  and 
chagrined  air, "  I'm  ruined !  Now,  try  your  hand  on  the 
doctor,  while  I  go  and  speak  to  these  people.  I  wonder  what 
can  possibly  have  brought  them  here.  Oh,  I  see — I  see ;  'tis 
probably  about  Miss  Evelyn's  marriage-settlement— I'm  to 
be  one  of  her  trustees."  With  this  he  left  the  room,  and 
presently  entered  the  library,  where  were  two  gentlemen, 
one  of  whom,  a  stranger,  was  in  the  act  of  pulling  off  his 
great-coat.  It  was  Mr.  Runnington  ;  a  tall,  thin,  elderly  man, 
with  short  gray  hair— his  countenance  bespeaking  the  calm, 
acute,  clear-headed  man  of  business.  The  other  was  Mr. 
Parkinson ;  a  plain,  substantial-looking,  hard-headed  country 
attorney. 

"  Mr.  Runnington,  my  London  agent,  sir,"  said  he  to  Mr. 
Aubrey,  as  the  latter  entered.  Mr,  Aubrey  bowed. 


TEN  THOUSAND  A-YEAR.  219 

"  Pray,  gentlemen,  be  seated,"  he  replied  with  his  usual 
urbanity  of  manner,  taking  a  chair  beside  them. 

"Why,  Mr.  Parkinson,  you  look  very  serious — both  of  you. 
What  is  the  matter  ?  "  he  inquired  surprisedly. 

"  Mr.  Runnington,  sir,  has  arrived,  most  unexpectedly  to 
me,"  replied  Mr.  Parkinson,  "only  an  hour  or  two  ago,  from 
London,  on  business  of  the  last  importance  to  you." 
1     "  To  me  /—well,  what  is  it  ?   Pray,  say  at  once  what  it  is — 
I  am  all  attention,"  said  Mr.  Aubrey  anxiously. 

"  Do  you  happen,"  commenced  Mr.  Parkinson  very  ner- 
vously, "  to  remember  sending  Waters  to  me  on  Monday  or 
Tuesday  last,  with  a  paper  which  had  been  served  by  some 
one  on  old  Jolter  ?  " 

"  Certainly,"  replied  Mr.  Aubrey,  after  a  moment's  con- 
sideration. 

"Mr.  Runnington's  errand  is  connected  with  that  docu- 
ment,'' said  Mr.  JParkinson,  and  paused. 

"  Indeed ! "  exclaimed  Mr.  Aubrey,  apparently  a  little 
relieved.  "  I  assure  you,  gentlemen,  you  very  greatly  over- 
estimate the  importance  I  attach  to  anything  that  such  a 
troublesome  person  as  Mr.  Tomkins  can  do,  if  I  am  right  in 
supposing  that  it  is  he  who Well,  then,  what  is  the  mat- 
ter?" he  inquired  quickly,  observing  Mr.  Parkinson  shake 
his  head,  and  interchange  a  grave  look  with  Mr.  Runnington ; 
"you  cannot  think,  Mr.  Parkinson,  how  you  will  oblige  me 
by  being  explicit." 

"This  paper,"  said  Mr.  Runnington,  holding  up  that  which 
Mr.  Aubrey  at  once  recollected  as  the  one  on  which  he  had 
cast  his  eye  on  its  being  handed  to  him  by  Waters,  "  is  a 
Declaration  in  Ejectment,  with  which  Mr.  Tomkins  has 
nothing  whatever  to  do.  It  is  served  virtually  on  you,  and 
you  are  the  real  defendant." 

"  So  I  apprehend  I  was  in  the  former  trumpery  action." 

"  Do  you  recollect,  Mr.  Aubrey,"  said  Mr.  Parkinson,  with 
a  trepidation  which  he  could  not  conceal,  "  several  years 
ago,  some  serious  conversation  which  you  and  I  had  together 
on  the  state  of  your  title — when  I  was  preparing  your  mar- 
riage-settlements ?  " 

Mr.  Aubrey  started,  and  his  face  was  suddenly  blanched. 

''  The  matters  we  then  discussed  have  suddenly  acquired 
fearful  importance.  This  paper  occasions  us,  on  your  account, 
the  profoundest  anxiety."  Mr.  Aubrey  continued  silent, 
gazing  on  Mr.  Parkinson  with  intensity.  "  Supposing,  from 
a  hasty  glance  at  it,  and  from  the  message  accompanying  it, 
that  it  was  merely  another  action  of  Tomkins  about  the  slip 
of  waste  land  attached  to  Jolter's  cottage,  I  sent  it  up  to 
London  to  my  agents',  Messrs.  Runnington,  requesting  them 
to  call  on  the  plaintiff's  attorney,  and  settle  the  action.  He 
did  so ;  and — perhaps,  you  will  explain  the  rest,"  said  Mr. 
Parkinson  to  Mr.  Runnington. 

"  Certainly,"  said  that  gentleman  with  a  serious  air,  but 


220  TEN  THOUSAND  A-YEAR. 

much  more  calmly  and  firmly  than  Mr.  Parkinson  ;  "  I  called 
accordingly,  early  yesterday  morning,  on  Messrs.  Quirk, 
Gammon,  and  Snap— they  are  a  very  well— but  not  enviably 
— known  firm  in  the  profession ;  and  in  a  very  few  minutes 
my  misconception  of  the  nature  of  the  business  I  had  called 
to  settle  was  set  right.  In  short —  •"  he  paused,  as  if  dis- 
tressed at  the  intelligence  he  was  about  to  communicate. 
j  "  Oh,  pray,  pray  go  on,  sir,"  said  Mr.  Aubrey  in  a  low 
tone. 

"  I  am  no  stranger,  sir,  to  your  firmness  of  character ;  but 
I  shall  have  to  tax  it,  I  fear,  to  its  uttermost.  To  come  at 
once  to  the  point— they  told  me  that  I  might  undoubtedly 
settle  the  matter,  if  you  would  consent  to  give  up  immediate 
possession  of  the  whole  Yatton  estate,  and  account  for  the 
mesne  profits  to  their  client,  the  right  heir— as  they  contend 
— a  Mr.  Tittlebat  Titmouse."  Mr.  Aubrey  leaned  back  in 
his  chair,  overcome,  for  an  instant,  by  this  astounding  intel- 
ligence ;  and  all  three  of  them  preserved  silence  of  more  than 
a  minute.  Mr.  Runnington  was  a  man  of  a  very  feeling 
heart.  In  the  course  of  his  great  practice  he  had  had  to  encoun- 
ter many  distressing  scenes  ;  but  probably  none  of  them  had 
equalled  that  in  which,  at  the  earnest  entreaty  of  Mr.  Park- 
inson, who  distrusted  his  own  self-possession,  he  now  bore  a 
leading  part.  The  two  attorneys  interchanged  frequent 
looks  of  deep  sympathy  for  their  unfortunate  client,  who 
seemed  as  if  stunned  by  the  intelligence  they  had  brought 
him. 

"  I  felt  it  my  duty  to  lose  not  an  instant  in  coming  down  to 
Yatton,"  resumed  Mr.  Runnington,  observing  Mr.  Aubrey's 
eye  again  directed  inquiringly  towards  him ;  "  for  Messrs. 
Quirk,  Gammon,  and  Snap  are  very  dangerous  people  to  deal 
with,  and  must  be  encountered  "promptly,  and  with  the 
greatest  possible  caution.  The  moment  that  I  had  left  them,  I 
hastened  to  the  Temple,  to  retain  for  you  Mr.  Subtle,  the 
leader  of  the  Northern  Circuit ;  but  they  had  been  beforehand 
with  me,  and  retained  him  nearly  three  months  ago,  to- 
gether with  another  eminent  king's  counsel  on  the  circuit. 
Under  these  circumstances,  I  lost  no  time  in  giving  a  special 
retainer  to  the  Attorney-General,  in  which  I  trust  I  have 
done  right,  and  in.  retaining  as  junior  a  gentleman  whom  I 
consider  to  be  incomparably  the  ablest  and  most  experienced 
lawyer  on  the  circuit." 

"  Did  they  say  anything  concerning  the  nature  of  their 
client's  title  ?  "  inquired  Mr.  Aubrey,  after  some  expressions 
of  amazement  and  dismay. 

"  Very  little— I  might  say,  nothing.  If  they  had  been  never 
so  precise,  of  course  I  should  have  distrusted  every  word  they 
said.  They  certainly  mentioned  that  they  had  had  the  first 
conveyancing  opinions  in  the  kingdom,  which  concurred  in 
favor  of  their  client ;  that  they  had  been  for  months  prepar- 


TEN  THOUSAND  A-YEAR.  221 

ed  at  all  points,  and  accident  only  had  delayed  their  com- 
mencing  proceeding's  till  now." 

"  Did  you  make  any  inquiries  as  to  who  the  claimant  was  ?  " 
inquired  Mr.  Aubrey. 

Yes  ;  but  all  I  could  learn  was,  that  they  had  discovered 
him  by  mere  accident ;  and  that  he  was  at  present  in  very 
obscure  and  distressed  circumstances.  I  tried  to  discover  by 
what  means  they  proposed  to  commence  and  carry  on  so  ex- 
pensive a  contest ;  but  they  smiled  significantly,  and  were 
silent."  Another  long  pause  ensued,  during  which  Mr.  Au- 
brey was  evidently  silently  struggling  with  very  agitating 
emotions. 

"  What  is  the  meaning  of  their  affecting  to  seek  the  recov. 
ery  of  only  one  insignificant  portion  of  the  property  ?  "  he  /.i^ 
quired. 

"  It  is  their  own  choice — it  may  be  from  consideration  of 
mere  convenience.  The  title,  however,  by  which  they  may 
succeed  in  recovering  what  they  at  present  go  for,  will  avail 
to  recover  every  acre  of  the  estate,  and  the  present  action 
will  consequently  decide  everything ! " 

"  And  suppose  the  worst— that  they  are  successful,"  said 
Mr.  Aubrey,  after  they  had  conversed  a  good  deal,  and  very 
anxiously,  on  the  subject  of  a  presumed  infirmity  in  Mr.  Au- 
brey's title,  which  had  been  pointed  out  to  him  in  general 
terms,  by  Mr.  Parkinson,  on  the  occasion  already  averted  to 
— "  what  is  to  be  said  about  the  rental  which  I  have  been  re- 
ceiving all  this  time — ten  thousand  a-year?"  inquired  Mr. 
Aubrey,  looking  as  if  he  dreaded  to  hear  his  question  an- 
swered. 

"  Oh  !  that's  quite  an  after  consideration— let  us  fight  the 
battle." 

"  I  beg,  Mr.  Runningtcn,  that  you  will  withhold  nothing 
from  me,"  said  Mr.  Aubrey.  "  To  what  extent  shall  I  be 
liable?" 

Mr.  Runnington  paused. 

"  I  am  afraid  that  all  the  mesne  profits,  as  they  are  called, 
which  you  have  received  " — commenced  Mr.  Parkinson 

"  No,  no,"  interrupted  Mr.  Runnington ;  "  I  have  been 
turning  that  matter  over  in  my  mind,  and  I  think  that  the 
statute  of  limitations  will  bar  all  but  the  last  six  years " 

"  Why,  that  will  be  sixty  thousand  pounds  ! "  interrupted 
Mr.  Aubrey,  with  a  look  of  sudden  despair.  "Gracious 
Heavens,  that  is  perfectly  frightful !— frightful !  If  I  lose 
Yatton,  I  shall  not  have  a  place  to  put  my  head  in— not  one 
farthing  to  support  myself  with !  And  yet  to  have  to  make 
up  sixty  thousand  pounds!"  The  perspiration  stood  upon 
his  forehead,  and  his  eye  was  laden  with  alarm  and  agony. 
He  slowly  rose  from  his  chair  and  bolted  the  door,  that  they 
might  not,  at  such  an  agitating  moment,  be  surprised  or  di& 
turbed  by  any  of  the  servants  or  his  family. 

"  I  suppose,"  said  he  in  a  faint  and  tremulous  tone%  "  that 


222  TEN  THOUSAND  A- YEAR. 

• 

if  this  claim  succeed,  my  mother  will  also  share  my  fate " 

They  shook  their  head  in  silence. 

"  Permit  me  to  suggest,"  said  Mr.  Runnington,  in  a  tone 
of  the  most  respectful  sympathy,  "  that  sufficient  for  the  day 
is  the  evil  thereof." 

"  But  the  NIGHT  follows !  "  said  Mr.  Aubrey,  with  a  visible 
tremor ;  and  his  voice  made  the  hearts  of  his  companions 
thrill  within  them.  "  I  have  a  frightful  misgiving  as  to  the 
issue  of  these  proceedings !  I  ought  not  to  have  neglected 
the  matter  pointed  out  to  me  by  Mr.  Parkinson  on  my  marri- 
age. I  feel  as  if  I  had  been  culpably  lying  by  ever  since.  But 
I  really  did  not  attach  to  it  the  importance  it  deserved  :  I 
never,  indeed,  distinctly  appreciated  the  nature  of  what  was 
then  pointed  out  to  me ! ' 

"  A  thousand  pities  that  a  fine  was  not  levied,  is  it  not?  " 
said  Mr.  Runnington. 

"Ay  indeed  it  is  ! "  replied  Mr.  Parkinson  with  a  sigh,  and 
they-spoke  together  for  some  time,  and  very  earnestly,  con- 
cerning the  nature  and  efficacy  of  such  a  measure,  which 
they  explained  to  Mr.  Aubrey. 

"  It  comes  to  this,"  said  he,  "  that  in  all  probability,  I  and 
my  family  are  at  this  moment" — he  shuddered— " trespass- 
ers at  Yatton ! " 

"  That,  Mr.  Aubrey,"  said  Mr.  Parkinson  earnestly,  "  re- 
mains to  be  proved !  We  really  are  getting  on  far  too  fast. 
One  would  think  that  the  jury  had  already  returned  a  ver- 
dict against  us— that  judgment  had  been  signed  -and  that 
the  sheriff  was  coming  in  the  morning  to  execute  the  writ 
of  possession  in  favor  of  our  opponent."  This  was  well 
meant  by  the  speaker;  but  surety  it  was  like  talking  of  the 
machinery  of  the  ghastly  guillotine  to  the  wretch  in  shiver- 
ing expectation  of  suffering  by  it  on  the  morrow.  An  invol- 
untary shudder  ran  through  Mr.  Aubrey.  "  Sixty  thousand 
pounds ! "  he  exclaimed,  rising  and  walking  to  and  fro. 

Why,  I  am  ruined  beyond  all  redemption !  How  can  I  ever 
satisfy  it  ? '  Again  he  paced  the  room  several  times,  in  si- 
lent agony.  Presently  he  re'sumed  his  seat.  "  I  have,  for 
these  several  days  past,  had  a  strange  sense  of  impending 
calamity,"  and  yet,  more  calmly — "I  have  been  equally  un- 
able to  account  for,  or  get  rid  of  it.  It  may  be  an  intimation 
from  Heaven ;  I  bow  to  its  will ! '" 

"  We  must  remember,"  said  Mr.  Runnington  "  that  'pos- 
session ts  nine-tenths  of  the  law  ;  '  which  means,  that  your 
mere  possession  will  entitle  you  to  retain  it  against  all  the 
world,  till  a  stronger  title  than  yours  to  the  right  of  posses- 
sion be  made  out.  You  stand  on  a  mountain  ;  and  it  is  for 
your  adversary  to  displace  you,  not  by  showing  merely  that 
you  have  no  real  title,  but  that  he  has.  If  he  could  prove  all 
your  title-deeds  to  be  merely  waste  paper— that  in  fact  you 
nave  no  more  title  than  I  have— he  would  not  by  stopping 
there  advance  his,  own  case  an  inch ;  he  must  first  establish 


TEN  THOUSAND  A-YEAE.  223 

in  himself  a  clear  and  independent  title;  so  that  you  are 
entirely  on  the  defensive ;  and  rely  upon  it,  that  though  never 
so  many  screws  may  be  loose,  so  acute  and  profound  a  laAvyer 
as  the  Attorney-General  will  impose  every  difficulty  on " 

"  Nay,  but  God  forbid  that  any  unconscientious  advantage 
should  be  taken  on  my  behalf ! "  said  Mr.  Aubrey.  Mr.  Run- 
nington and  Mr.  Parkinson  both  opened  their  eyes  pretty 
wide  at  this  sallv :  the  latter  could  not  understand  but  that 
everything  was  fair  in  war ;  the  former  saw  and  appreciated 
the  nobility  of  soul  which  had  dictated  the  exclamation. 

"  I  suppose  the  affair  will  soon  become  public,"  said  Mr. 
Aubrey,  with  an  air  of  profound  depression,  after  much 
further  conversation. 

"  Your  position  in  the  country,  your  eminence  in  public 
life,  the  singularity  of  the  case,  and  the  magnitude  of  the 
stake— all  are  circumstances  undoubtedly  calculated  soon  to 
urge  the  affair  before  the  notice  of  the  public,"  said  Mr. 
Runnington. 

"What  disastrous  intelligence  to  break  to  my  family!" 
exclaimed  Mr.  Aubrey  tremulously.  "With  what  fearful 
suddenness  it  has  burst  upon  us !  But  something,  I  suppose," 
he  presently  added  with  forced  calmness,  "  must  be  done  im- 
mediately?" 

"  Undoubtedly," replied  Mr.  Runnington.  "  Mr.  Parkinson 
and  I  will  immediately  proceed  to  examine  your  title-deeds, 
the  greater  portion  of  which  are,  I  understand,  here  in  the 
Hall,  and  the  rest  at  Mr.  Parkinson's ;  and  prepare,  without 
delay,  a  case  for  the  opinion  of  the  Attorney-General,  and 
also  of  the  most  eminent  conveyancers  of  the  kingdom. 
AVho,  by  the  way,"  said  Mr.  Runnington,  addressing  Mr. 
Parkinson — "  who  was  the  conveyancer  that  had  the  abstracts 
before  him,  on  preparing  Mr.  Aubrey's  marriage-settle- 
ment?" 

"  Ohj  you  are  alluding  to  the  4  Opinion '  I  mentioned  to 
you  this  evening?"  inquired  Mr.  Parkinson.  "I  have  it  at 
my  house,  and  will  show  it  you  in  the  morning.  The  doubt 
he  expressed  on  one  or  two  points  gave  me,  I  recollect,  no 
little  uneasiness — as  you  may  remember,  Mr.  Aubrey." 

"  I  certainly  do,"  he  replied,  with  a  profound  sigh ;  "  but 
though  what  you  said  reminded  me  of  something  or  another 
that  I  had  heard  when  a  mere  boy,  I  thought  no  more  of  it. 
I  think  you  also  told  me  that  the  gentleman  who  wrote  the 
opinion  was  a  nervous  fidgety  man,  always  raising  difficulties 
in  his  clients'  titles — and  one  way  or  another,  the  thing 
never  gave  me  any  concern — scarcely  ever  even  occurred  to 
my  thoughts,  till  to-day !  \Vhat  infatuation  has  been  mine ! 
But  you  will  take  a  little  refreshment,  gentlemen,  after  your 
.journey?  "  said  Mr.  Aubrey  suddenly,  glad  of  the  opportunity 
it  would  afford  him  of  reviving  his  own  exhausted  spirits  by 
a  cup  of  wine,  before  returning  to  the  drawing-room.  He 
swallowed  several  glasses  of  wine  without  any  immediately 


224  TEN  THOUSAND  A-YEAR. 

perceptible  effect ;  and  the  bearers  of  the  direful  intelligence 
just  communicated  to  the  reader,  after  a  promise  by  Mr. 
Aubrey  to  drive  over  to  Grilston  early  in  the  morning,  and 
bring  with  him  such  of  his  title-deeds  as  were  then  at  the 
Hall,  took  their  departure ;  leaving  him  outwardly  calmer, 
but  with  a  fearful  oppression  at  his  heart.  He  made  a 
powerful  effort  to  control  his  feelings,  so  as  to  conceal,  for  a 
while  at  least,  the  dreadful  occurrence  of  the  evening.  His' 
face,  however,  on  re-entering  the  drawing-room,  which  his 
mother,  attended  by  Kate,  had  quitted  for  her  bed-room, 
somewhat  alarmed  Mrs.  Aubrey ;  whom,  however,  he  at  once 
quieted,  by  saying  that  he  certainly  had  been  annoyed — "ex- 
cessively annoyed  " — at  a  communication  just  made  to  him ; 
"  and  which  might,  in  fact  prevent  his  sitting  again  for  Yat- 
ton."  "Oh,  that's  the  cause  of  your  long  stay?  There, 
Doctor,  am  I  not  right?"  said  Mrs.  Aubrey,  appealing  to  Dr. 
Tatham.  "  Did  I  not  tell  you  that  this  was  something  con- 
nected with  politics?  Charles.  I  do  hate  politics— give  me  a 
quiet  home !  "  A  pang  shot  through  Mr.  Aubrey  s  heart ; 
but  he  felt  that  he  had,  for  the  present,  succeeded  in  his 
object. 

Mr.  Aubrey's  distracted  mind  was  indeed,  as  it  were, 
buffeted  about  that  night  on  a  dark  sea  of  trouble ;  while 
the  beloved  being  beside  him  lay  sleeping  peacefully,  all  un- 
conscious of  the  rising  storm.  Many  times,  during  the  dis- 
mal night,  would  he  have  risen  from  his  bed  to  seek  a  mo- 
mentary relief  by  walking  to  and  fro,  but  that  he  feared  dis- 
turbing her,  and  disclosing  the  extent  and  depths  of  his  dis- 
tress. It  was  nearly  five  o'clock  in  the  morning  before  he  at 
length  sunk  into  sleep ;  and  of  one  thing  I  can  assure  the 
reader,  that  however  that  excellent  man  might  have  shrunk 
— and  shrunk  he  did — from  the  sufferings  that  seemed  in 
store  for  him,  and  those  who  were  far  dearer  to  him  than  life 
itself,  he  did  not  give  way  to  one  repining  or  rebellious 
thought.  On  the  contrary,  his  real  frame  of  mind,  on  that 
trying  occasion,  may  be  discovered  in  one  short  prayer, 
which  he  more  than  once  was  on  the  point  of  expressing 
aloud  in  words — "  Oh  my  God !  in  my  prosperity  I  have  ever 
acknowledged  thee ;  forsake  me  not  in  my  adversity !  " 

At  an  early  hour  in  the  morning  his  carriage  drew  up  at 
Mr.  Parkinson's  door ;  and  he  brought  with  him,  as  he  had 
promised,  a  great  number  of  title-deeds  and  family  docu- 
ments. On  these,  as  well  as  on  many  others  which  were  in 
Mr.  Parkinson's  custody,  that  gentleman  and  Mr.  Runnington 
were  anxiously  engaged  during  almost  every  minute  of  that 
day  and  the  ensuing  one ;  at  the  close  of  which,  they  had 
between  them  drawn  up  the  rough  draft  of  a  case,  with 
which  Mr.  Runnington  set  off  for  town  by  the  mail ;  under- 
taking to  lay  it  immediately  before  the  Attorney-General,  and 
also  before  one  or  two  of  the  greatest  conveyancers  of  the 
day?  commended  to  their  best  and  earliest  attention,  He 


TEN  THOUSAND  A-YEAB.  225 

pledged  himself  to  transmit  their  opinions,  by  the  very  first 
mail,  to  Mr.  Parkinson;  and  both  those  gentlemen  im- 
mediately set  about  active  preparations  for  defending  the 
ejectment.  The  "  eminent  conveyancer  "  fixed  upon  by 
Messrs.  Runnington  and  Parkinson  was  Mr.  Tresayle,  whose 
clerk,  hoM^ever,  on  looking  into  the  papers,  presently  carried 
them  back  to  Messrs.  Runnington,  with  the  startling  in- 
formation that  Mr.  Tresayle  had,  a  few  months  ago,  "  advised 
on  the  other  side."  The  next  person  whom  Mr.  Runnington 
thought  of,  was — singularly  enough— Mr.  Mortmain,  who,  on 
account  of  his  eminence,  was  occasionally  employed,  in 
heavy  matters,  by  the  firm.  His  clerk,  also,  on  the  ensuing 
morning  returned  the  papers,  assigning  a  similar  reason  to 
that  which  had  been  given  by  Mr.  Tresayle's  clerk!  All 
this  formed  a  sad  corroboration,  truly,  of  Messrs.  Quirk  and 
Gammon's  assurance  to  Mr.  Runnington,  that  they  had  "  had 
the  first  conveyancing  opinions  in  the  kingdom  ;  "  and  evi- 
denced the  formidable  scale  on  which  their  operations  were 
being  conducted.  There  were,  however,  other  "eminent 
conveyancers  "  besides  the  two  above  mentioned ;  and  in  the 
hands  of  Mr.  Mansfield,  who,  with  a  less  extended  reputa- 
tion, but  an  equal  practice,  was  a  far  abler  man,  and  a  much 
higher  style  of  conveyancer  than  Mr.  Mortmain,  Mr.  Run- 
nington left  his  client's  interests  with  the  utmost  confidence. 
Not  satisfied  with  this,  he  laid  the  case  also  before  Mr. 
Crystal,  the  junior  whom  he  had  already  retained  in  the 
cause — a  man  whose  lucid  understanding  was  not  ill  indicated 
by  his  name.  Though  his  manner  in  court  was  not  particu- 
larly forcible  or  attractive,  he  was  an  invaluable  acquisition 
in  an  important  case.  To  law  he  had  for  some  twenty  years 
applied  himself  with  unwearying  energy ;  and  he  conse- 
quently became  a  ready,  accurate,  and  thorough  lawyer, 
equal  to  all  the  practical  exigencies  of  his  profession.  He 
brought  his  knowledge  to  bear  on  every  point  presented  to 
him  with  beautiful  precision.  He  was  equally  quick  and 
cautious— artful  to  a  degree — But  I  shall  have  other  oppor- 
tunities of  describing  him  ;  since  on  him,  as  on  every  work- 
ing  junior,  will  devolve  the  real  conduct  of  the  defendant's 
case  in  the  memorable  action  of  Doe  on  the  demise  of  Tit' 
mouse  v.  Roe. 

As  Mr.  Aubrey  was  driving  home  from  the  visit  to  Mr. 
Parkinson  which  I  have  just  above  mentioned,  he  stopped 
his  carriage  on  entering  the  village,  because  he  saw  Dr. 
Tatham  coming  put  of  Williams's  cottage,  where  he  had 
been  paying  a  visit  to  a  poor  dying  Phoebe. 

The  little  Doctor  was  plunthering  on,  ankle-deep  in  snow, 
towards  the  vicarage,  when  Mr.  Aubrey  (who  had  sent  home 
his  carriage  with  word  that  he  should  presently  follow)  came 
up  with  him,  and  greeting  him  with  unusual  fervor,  said  that 
he  would  accompany  him  to  the  vicarage. 

"  You  are  in  very  great  trouble,  my  dear  friend,"  said  the 


226  TEN  THOUSAND  A-TEAR. 

Doctor  seriously—"  I  saw  it  plainly  last  night ;  but  of  course 
I  said  nothing.  Come  in  with  me  !  Let  us  talk  freely  with 
one  another ;  for,  as  iron  sharpeneth  iron,  so  doth  the  counte- 
nance of  a  man  his  friend.  Is  it  not  so  ?  " 

"  It  is  indeed,  my  dear  Doctor,"  replied  Mr.  Aubrey,  sud- 
denly softened  by  the  affectionate  simplicity  of  the  Doctor's 
manner.  How  much  the  good  Doctor  was  shocked  by  the 
communication  which  Mr.  Aubrey  presently  made  to  him, 
the  reader  may  easily  imagine.  He  even  shed  tears,  on  be- 
holding the  forced  calmness  with  which  Mr.  Aubrey  depicted 
the  gloomy  prospect  that  was  before  him.  'Twas  not  in 
vain,  however,  that  the  pious  and  venerable  pastor  led  the 
subdued  and  willing  mind  of  his  beloved  companion  to  those 
sources  of  consolation  and  support  which  a  true  Christian 
cannot  approach  in  vain.  Upon  his  bruised  and  bleeding 
feelings  were  poured  the  balm  of  true  religious  consolation  ; 
and  Mr.  Aubrey  quitted  his  revered  companion  with  a  far 
firmer  tone  of  mind  than  that  with  which  he  had  entered  the 
vicarage.  But  when  he  passed  through  the  park  gates,  the 
sudden  reflection  that  he  was  probably  no  longer  the  pro- 
prietor of  the  dear  old  familiar  objects  that  met  his  eye  at 
every  step,  almost  overpowered  him. 

On  entering  the  Hall,  he  was  informed  that  one  of  the 
tenants,  Peter  Johnson,  had  been  sitting  in  the  servants' 
hall  for  nearly  two  hours  waiting  to  see  him.  Mr.  Aubrey 
repaired  at  once  to  the  library,  and  desired  the  man  to  be 
shown  in.  This  Johnson  had  been  for  some  twenty-five 
years  a  tenant  of  a  considerable  farm  on  the  estate,  had 
scarcely  ever  been  a  few  weeks  behindhand  with  his  rent, 
and  had  always  been  considered  one  of  the  most  exemplary 
persons  in  the  whole  neighborhood.  He  had  now,  poor  fel- 
low, got  into  trouble  indeed,  for  he  had,  a  year  or  two  before, 
been  persuaded  to  become  security  for  his  brother-in-law,  a 
tax-collector ;  and  had,  alas !  the  day  before,  been  called 
upon  to  pay  the  three  hundred  pounds  in  which  he  stood 
bound — his  worthless  brother-in-law  having  absconded  with 
nearly  £1000  of  the  public  money.  Poor  Johnson,  who  had 
a  large  family  to  support,  was  in  deep  tribulation,  bowed 
down  with  grief  and  shame ;  and  after  a  sleepless  night,  had 
at  length  ventured  down  to  Yatton,  and  with  a  desperate 
boldness  asked  the  benevolent  squire  to  advance  him  £200 
towards  the  money,  to  save  himself  from  being  cast  into 
prison.  Mr.  Aubrey  heard  his  sad  story  to  the  end  without 
one  single  interruption;  though  to  a  more  practised  observer 
than  the  troubled  old  farmer,  the  workings  of  his  counte- 
nance, from  time  to  time,  must  have  told  his  inward  agitation. 
"  I  lend  this  poor  soul  £200 !  "  thought  he,  "  who  am  penni- 
less myself  ?  Shall  I  not  be  really  acting  as  his  dishonest 
relative  has  been  acting,  and  making  free  with  money  that 
belongs  to  another  ?  " 

"  I  assure  you,  my  worthy  friend,"  said  he  at  length,  with. 


TEN  THOUSAND  A-YEAR.  227 

a  little  agitation  of  manner,  "  that  I  have  just  now  a  very 
serious  call  upon  me — or  you  know  how  gladly  I  would  have 
complied  with  your  request." 

"  Oh,  sir,  have  mercy  on  me !  I've  an  ailing  wife  and  seven 
children  to  support,"  said  poor  Johnson,  wringing  his  hands. 

"  Can't  I  do  anything  with  the  Government — 

"  No,  sir ;  I'm  told  they're  so  mighty  angry  with  my  ras- 
cally brother,  they'll  listen  to  nobody !  It's  a  hard  matter 
for  me  to  keep  things  straight  at  home  without  this,  sir,  I've 
so  many  mouths  to  fill ;  and  if  they  take  me  off  to  prison, 
Lord !  what's  to  become  of  us  all  ?  " 

Mr.  Aubrey's  lip  quivered.  Johnson  fell  on  his  knees,  and 
the  tears  ran  down  his  cheeks.  "I've  never  asked  a  living 
man  for  money  before,  sir ;  and  if  you'll  only  lend  it  me,  God 
Almighty  will  bless  you  and  yours  ;  you'll  save  us  all  from 
ruin ;  I'll  work  day  and  night  to  pay  it  back  again  ! " 

"Rise  —  rise,  Johnson,"  said  Mr.  Aubrey  with  emotion. 
"  You  shall  have  the  money,  my  friend,  if  you  will  call  to 
morrow,"  he  added  with  a  deep  sigh,  after  a  moment's  hesi- 
tation. 

He  was  as  good  as  his  word. 

Had  Mr.  Aubrey  been  naturally  of  a  cheerful  and  viva- 
cious turn,  the  contrast  now  afforded  by  his  gloomy  manner 
must  have  alarmed  his  family.  As  it  was,  however,  it  was 
not  so  strong  and  marked  as  to  be  attended  with  that  effect 
especially  as  he  exerted  himself  to  the  utmost  to  conceal  his 
distress.  That  something  had  gone  wrong,  he  freely  acknowl- 
edged ;  and  as  he  spoke  of  it  always  in  connection  with  polit- 
ical topics,  he  succeeded  in  parrying  their  questions,  and 
checking  suspicion.  But,  whenever  they  were  all  collected 
together,  could  he  not  justly  compare  them  to  a  happy  group, 
unconscious  that  they  stood  on  a  mine  which  was  about  to 
be  fired  ? 

About  a  week  afterwards,  namely,  on  the  12th  of  January, 
arrived  little  Charles's  birthday,  when  he  became  five  years 
old ;  and  Kate  had  for  some  days  been  moving  heaven  and 
earth  to  get  up  a  children's  party  in  honor  of  the  occasion. 
After  considerable  riding  and  driving  about,  she  succeeded 
in  persuading  the  parents  of  some  eight  or  ten  children — 
two  little  daughters,  for  instance,  of  the  Earl  of  Oldacre 
(beautiful  creatures  they  were,  to  be  sure)— little  Master  and 
the  two  Miss  Bertons,  the  children  of  one  of  the  county 
members— Sir  Harry  Oldfield,  an  orphan  of  about  five  years 
of  age,  the  infant  possessor  of  a  magnificent  estate— and  two 
or  three  little  girls  beside— and  to  send  them  all  to  Yatton 
for  a  day  and  a  night,  with  their  governesses  and  attendants. 

'Twas  a  charming  little  affair.  It  went  off  brilliantly, 
as  the  phrase  is,  and  repaid  all  Kate's  exertions.  She,  her 
mother,  and  brother  ana  sister,  all  dined  at  the  same  table, 
at  a  very  early  hour,  with  the  merry  little  guests,  who  (with 
a  laughable  crowd  of  attendants  behind  them,  to  be  sure) 


228  TEN  THOUSAND  A-YEAR. 

behaved  remarkably  well  on  the  occasion.  Sir  Harry  (a  little 
thing  about  Charles's  age— the  black  ribbon  round  his  waist, 
and  also  the  half-mourning  dress  worn  by  his  maid,  who 
stood  behind  him,  showed  how  recent  was  the  event  which 
niade  him  an  orphan)  proposed  little  Aubrey's  health, 
in  (I  must  own)  a  somewhat  stiff  speech,  demurely  dictated 
to  him  by  Kate,  (who  sat  between  him  and  her  beautiful 
little  nephew.)  She  then  performed  the  same  office  for 
Charles,  who  stood  on  a  chair  while  delivering  his  eloquent 
acknowledgment  of  the  toast, 

[Oh  !  that  anguished  brow  of  thine,  Aubrey,  (thank  God  it 
is  unobserved !)  but  it  tells  me  that  the  iron  is  entering  thy 
soul !] 

And  the  moment  that  he  had  done — Kate  folding  her  arms 
around  him  and  kissing  him— down  they  all  jumped,  and  a 
merry  throng,  scampered  off  to  the  drawing-room,  (followed 
by  Kate,)  where  blind-man's  buff,  husbands  and  wives,  and 
divers  other  little  games  kept  them  in  constant  enjoyment. 
After  tea  they  were  to  have  dancing — Kate  mistress  of  the 
ceremonies— and  it  was  quite  laughable  to  see  how  perpetu- 
ally she  was  foiled  in  her  efforts  to  form  the  little  sets.  The 
girls  were  orderly  enough — but  their  wild  little  partners 
were  quite  uncontrollable.  The  instant  they  were  placed, 
and  Kate  had  gone  to  the  instrument  and  struck  off  a  note 
or  two— heigh  !— there  was  a  scrambling  little  crowd,  jump- 
ing and  laughing,  and  chattering  and  singing !  Over  and 
over  again  she  formed  them  into  sets,  with  the  like  results. 
But  at  length  a  young  lady,  one  of  their  governesses,  took 
Miss  Aubrey's  place  at  the  piano,  leaving  tne  latter  to  super- 
intend the  performances  in  person.  She  at  length  succeeded 
in  getting  up  something  like  a  country-dance,  led  off  by 
Charles  and  little  Lady  Anne  Cherville,  the  eldest  daughter 
of  the  Earl  of  Oldacre,  a  beautiful  child  of  about  five  years 
old,  and  who,  judging  from  appearances,  bade  fair,  in  due 
time,  to  become  another  Lady  Caroline  Cd.versham.  You 
would  have  laughed  outright  to  watch  the  coquettish  airs 
which  this  little  creature  gave  herself  with  Charles,  whom 
,  yet  she  evidently  could  not  bear  to  see  dancing  with  another. 

"  Now  I  shall  dance  with  somebody  else  !  "  he  exclaimed, 
suddenly  letting  go  Lady  Anne,  and  snatching  hold  of  a 
sweet  little  thing,  Miss  Berton,  that  was  standing  modestly 
beside  him.  The  discarded  beauty  walked  with  a  stately  air 
and  a  swelling  heart,  towards  Mrs.  Aubrey,  who  sat  beside 
her  husband  on  the  sofa ;  and  on  reaching  "her,  she  stood  for 
a  few  moments  silently  watching  her  late  partner  busily  and 
gaily  engaged  with  her  successor— and  then  burst  into  tears. 

"  Charles !  "  called  out  Mrs.  Aubrey ;  who  had  watched  the 
whole  affair,  and  could  hardly  keep  her  countenance—"  come 
here  directly,  Charles." 

"Yes,  mamma!"  he  exclaimed— quite  unaware  of  the 
serious  aspect  which  things  were  assuming— and  without 


TEN  THOUSAND  A-YEAE. 

quitting  the  dance,  where  he  was  (as  his  jealous  mistress  too 
plainly  saw,  for,  despite  her  grief,  her  eye  seemed  to  follow 
all  his  motions)  skipping  about  with  infinite  glee  with  a  third 
partner— a  laughing  sister  of  his  last  partner. 

"  Come  here,  Charles,"  said  Mr.  Aubrey  ;  and  in  an  instant 
his  little  son,  all  flushed  and  breathless,  was  at  his  side. 

"  Well,  dear  papa !  "  said  he,  keeping  his  eye  fixed  on  the 
little  throng  he  had  just  quitted,  and  where  his  deserted 
partner  was  skipping  about  alone. 

"What  have  you  been  doing  to  Lady  Anne,  Charles?" 
said  his  father. 

"  Nothing,  dear  papa ! "  he  replied,  still  wistfully  eying  the 
dancers. 

"  You  know  you  left  me,  and  went  to  dance  with  Miss  Ber- 
ton  ;  you  did,  Charles !  "  said  the  offended  beauty. 

"That  is  not  behaving  like  a  little  gentleman,  Charles." 
said  his  father.  The  tears  came  into  the  child's  eyes. 

"  I'm  very  s? orry,  dear  papa,  I  will  dance  with  her  "- 

"  No,  not  now,"  said  Lady  Anne  haughtily. 

"  Oh,  pooh !  pooh  !— kiss  and  be  friends,"  said  Mrs.  Aubrey, 
laughing,  "  and  go  and  dance  as  prettily  as  you  were  doing 
before."  Little  Aubrey  put  his  arms  round  Lady  Anne, 
kissed  her,  and  away  they  both  started  to  the  dance  again. 
While  the  latter  part  of  this  scene  was  going  on,  Mr.  Aubrey's 
eye  caught  the  figure  of  a  servant  who  simply  made  his  ap- 
pearance and  then  retired,  (for  such  had  been  Mr.  Aubrey's 
orders,  in  the  event  of  any  messenger  coming  from  Grilston.) 
Hastily  whispering  that  he  should  return  soon,  he  left  the 
room.  In  the  hall  stood  a  clerk  from  Mr.  Parkinson  ;  and  on 
seeing  Mr.  Aubrey,  he  took  out  a  packet  and  retired — Mr. 
Aubrey,  with  evident  trepidation,  repairing  to  his  library. 
With  a  nervous  hand  he  broke  the  seal,  and  found  the  follow- 
ing letter  from  Mr.  Parkinson,  with  three  other  inclos- 
ures : — 

"  Grilston,  12th  Jan.  18—. 
"  MY  DEAR  SIR, 

"I  have  only  just  received,  and  at  once  forward  to  you, 
copies  of  the  three  opinions  given  by  the  Attorney-General, 
Mr.  Mansfield,  and  Mr.  Crystal.  I  lament  to  find  that  they 
are  all  of  a  discouraging  character.  They  are  quite  indepen- 
dent of  each  other,  having  been  laid  before  their  respective 
writers  at  the  same  moment ;  yet  you  will  observe  that  all 
three  of  them  have  hit  upon  precisely  the  same  point,  viz. 
that  the  descendants  of  Geoffry  Dreddlington  had  no  right 
to  succeed  to  the  inheritance  till  there  was  a  failure  of  the 
heirs  of  Stephen  Dreddlington.  If,  therefore,  our  opponents 
have  contrived  to  ferret  out  any  one  who  satisfies  that  desig- 
nation, (I  cannot  conjecture  how  they  can  ever  have  got  upon 
the  scent,)  I  really  fear  we  must  prepare  for  a  very  serious 
struggle.  I  have  been  quietly  pushing  my  inquiries  in  all 


230  TEN  THOUSAND  A-YEAE. 

directions,  with  a  view  to  obtaining  a  clue  to  the  case  intend 
ed  to  be  set  up  against  us,  and  which  you  will  find  very 
shrewdly  guessed  at  by  the  Attorney-General.  Nor  am  1 
the  only  party :  I  find,  in  the  field,  who  has  been  making 
pointed  inquiries  in  your  neighborhood ;  but  of  this  more 
when  we  meet  to-morrow. 

"  I  remain, 

"  Yours  very  respectfully, 

"  J.  PARKINSON. 
"  CHARLES  AUBREY,  ESQ.,  M.  P." 

Having  read  this  letter,  Mr.  Aubrey  sunk  back  in  his  chair 
and  remained  motionless  for  more  than  a  quarter  of  an  hour. 
At  length  he  roused  himself  and  read  over  the  opinions  ;  the 
effect  of  which — as  far  as  he  could  comprehend  their  techni- 
calities—he found  had  been  but  too  correctly  given  by  Mr. 
Parkinson.  Some  suggestions  and  inquiries  put  by  the  acute 
and  experienced  Mr.  Crystal,  suddenly  revived  recollections 
of  one  or  two  incidents  even  of  his  boyish  days,  long  forgotten, 
but  which,  as  he  reflected  upon  them,  began  to  re-appear  to  his 
mind's  eye  with  sickening  distinctness.  Wave  after  wave  of 
apprehension  and  agony  passed  over  him,  chilling  and  be- 
numbing his  heart  within  him;  so  that, when  his  little  son  came 
some  time  afterwards  running  up  to  him,  with  a  message  from 
his  mamma,  that  she  hoped  he  could  come  back  to  see  them  all 
play  at  snapdragon  before  they  went  to  bed,  he  answered  him 
mechanically,  hardly  seeming  sensible  even  of  his  presence. 
At  length,  with  a  groan  that  came  from  the  depths  of  his 
heart,  he  rose  and  walked  to  and  fro,  sensible  of  the  neces- 
sity of  exerting  himself,  and  preparing  himself,  in  some  de- 
gree, for  encountering  his  mother,  his  wife,  and  his  sister. 
Taking  up  his  candle,  he  hastened  to  his  dressing-room, 
where  he  hoped,  by  the  aid  of  refreshing  ablutions,  to  suc- 
ceed in  effacing  at  least,  the  stronger  of  those  traces  of  suf- 
fering which  his  glass  displayed  to  him,  as  it  reflected  the 
image  of  his  agitated  countenance.  A  sudden  recollection  of 
the  critical  and  delicate  situation  of  his  idolized  wife,  glanced 
through  his  heart  like  a  keen  arrow.  He  sunk  upon  the  sofa, 
and,  clasping  his  hands,  looked  indeed  forlorn.  Presently 
the  door  was  pushed  hastily  but  gently  open ;  and,  first  look- 
ing in  to  see  that  it  was  really  he  of  wnqm  she  was  in  search, 
in  rushed  Mrs.  Aubrey,  pale  and  agitated,  having  been 
alarmed  by  his  long-continued  absence  from  the  drawing- 
room,  and  the  look  of  the  servant  f  rom  whom  she  had  learned 
that  his  master  had  been  for  some  time  gone  up-stairs. 

"Charles!  my  love!  my  sweet  love!"  she  exclaimed, 
rushing  up  to  him,  sitting  down  beside  him,  and  casting  her 
arms  round  his  neck.  Overcome  by  the  suddenness  of  her 
appearance  and  movements,  for  a  moment  he  spoke  not. 

"For  mercy's  sake — as  you  love  me! — tell  me,  dearest 
Charles,  what  has  happened ! " 


TEN  THOUSAND  A-YEAE.  231 

"  Nothing— love— nothing,"  he  replied ;  but  his  look  belied 
his  speech. 
"  Oh !  am  not  I  your  wife,  dearest  ?   Charles,  I  shall  really 

fo  distracted  if  you  do  not  tell  me  what  has  happened.  I 
now  that  something— something  dreadful—"  Pie  put  his 
arm  round  her  waist,  and  drew  her  tenderly  towards  him. 
He  felt  her  heart  beating  violently.  He  kissed  her  cold  fore- 
head, but  spoke  not. 

"  Come,  dearest !  let  me  share  your  sorrows,"  said  she  in  a 
thrilling  voice.  "  Cannot  you  trust  your  Agnes  ?  Has  not 
Heaven  sent  me  to  share  your  anxieties  and  griefs  ?  " 

"I  love  you,  Agnes!  ay,  more  than  ever  man  loved 
woman !  "  he  faltered,  as  he  felt  her  arms  folding  him  in 
closer  and  closer  embrace  ;  and  she  gazed  at  him  with  wild 
agitation,  expecting  presently  to  hear  of  some  fearful 
catastrophe, 

"  I  cannot  bear  this  much  longer,  dearest— I  feel  I  cannot," 
said  she,  rather  faintly.  "  What  has  happened  ?  What, 
that  you  dare  not  tell  me  f  I  can  bear  anything,  while  I 
have  you  and  my  children !  You  have  been  unhappy,  my 
own  Charles,  for  many  days  past.  I  have  felt  that  you 
were ! — I  will  not  part  with  you  till  I  know  all !  " 

"  You  soon  must  know  all,  my  sweet  love ;  and  I  take 
Heaven  to  witness?  that  it  is  principally  on  your  account, 

and  that  of  my  children,  that  1 In  fact,  I  did  not  wish 

any  of  you  to  have  known  it  till " 

"You— are  never  going — to  fight  a  duel?"  she  gasped, 
turning  as  white  as  death. 

"  Oh !  no,  no,  Agnes !  I  solemnly  assure  you  !  If  I  could 
have  brought  myself  to  engage  in  such  an  unhallowed 
affair,  would  this  scene  ever  first  have  occurred  ?  No,  no, 
my  own  love  !  Must  I  then  tell  you  of  the  misfortune  that 
has  overtaken  us  ?  "  His  words  somewhat  restored  her,  but 
she  continued  to  gaze  at  him  in  mute  and  breathless  appre- 
hension. Let  me  then  conceal  nothing,  Agnes— they  are 
bringing  an  action  against'  me,  which,  if  successful,  may 
cause  us  all  to  quit  Yatton — and  it  may  be,  forever." 

"  Oh,  Charles !  "  she  murmured,  her  eyes  riveted  upon  his, 
while  she  unconsciously  moved  still  nearer  to  him  and 
trembled.  Her  head  dropped  upon  his  shoulder. 

"  Why  is  this? "  she  whispered,  after  a  pause. 

"  Let  us,  dearest,  talk  of  it  another  time.  I  have  now  told 
you  what  you  asked  me."— He  poured  her  out  a  glass  of 
water.  Having  drunk  a  little,  she  appeared  revived. 

"  Is  all  lost  ?  Do,  my  own  Charles — let  me  know  really  the 
worst!  " 

u  We  are  young,  Agnes,  and  have  the  world  before  us. 
Health  and  honor  are  better  than  riches.  You  and  our 
little  loves — the  children  which  God  has  given  us — are  my 
riches,"  said  he,  gazing  with  unspeakable  tenderness  at  her. 
"  Even  should  it  be  the  will  of  Heaven  that  this  affair  should 


232  TEN  THOUSAND  A-YEAE. 

go  against  us— so  long  as  they  cannot  separate  us  from  each 
other,  they  cannot  really  hurt  us."  She  suddenly  kissed 
him  with  frantic  energy,  and  an  hysteric  smile  gleamed 
over  her  pallid  excited  features. 

"  Calm  yourself,  Agnes !— calm  yourself,  for  my  sake !— as 
you  love  me ! "  His  voice  quivered.  "  Oh,  how  very  weak 
and  foolish  I  have  been  to  yield  to  — 

"No.  no,  no!"  she  gasped,  evidently  laboring  with 
hysteric  oppression.  "  Hush ! ''  said  she,  suddenly  starting, 
and  wildly  leaning  forward  towards  the  door  which  opened 
into  the  gallery  leading  into  the  various  bedrooms.  He 
listened— the  mother's  ear  had  been  quick  and  true.  He 
presently  heard  the  sound  of  many  children's  voices  ap- 
proaching: they  were  the  little  party,  accompanied  by 
Kate,  on  their  way  to  bed;  and  little  Charles's  voice  was 
loudest,  and  his  laugh  the  merriest  of  them  all.  A  Avild 
smile  gleamed  on  Mrs.  Aubrey's  face ;  her  hand  grasped  her 
husband's  with  convulsive  pressure  ;  and  she  suddenly  sunk, 
rigid  and  senseless,  upon  the  sofa.  He  seemed  for  a  moment 
stunned  at  the  sight  of  her  motionless  figure,  Soon,  how- 
ever, recovering  his  presence  of  mind,  he  rang  the  bell,  and 
one  or  two  female  attendants  quickly  appeared  ;  and  by  their 
joint  assistance  Mrs.  Aubrey  was  carried  to  her  bed  in  the 
adjoining  room,  where,  by  the  use  of  the  ordinary  remedies, 
she  was  presently  restored  to  consciousness.  Her  first 
languid  look  was  towards  Mr.  Aubrey,  whose  hand  she 
slowly  raised  to  her  lips.  She  tried  to  throw  a  smile  over 
her  wan  features— but  'twas  in  vain ;  and,  after  a  few  heavy 
and  half-choking  sobs,  her  over-charged  feelings  found 
relief  in  a  flood  of  tears.  Full  of  the  liveliest  apprehensions 
as  to  the  effect  of  this  violent  emotion  upon  her,  in  her 
critical  condition,  he  remained  with  her  for  some  time, 
pouring  into  her  ear  every  soothing  and  tender  expression 
ne  could  think  of.  He  at  length  succeeded  in  bringing  her 
into  a  somewhat  more  tranquil  state  than  he  could  have 
expected.  He  strictly  enjoined  the  attendants,  who  had  not 
quitted  their  lady's  chamber,  and  whose  alarmed  and 
inquisitive  looks  he  had  noticed  for  some  time  with 
anxiety,  to  preserve  silence  concerning  what  they  had  so 
unexpectedly  witnessed.,  adding,  that  something  unfortunate 
had  happened,  of  which  they  would  hear  but  too  soon. 

"Are  you  going  to  tell  Kate?"  whispered  Mrs.  Aubrey 
sorrowfully.  "  Surely,  love,  you  have  suffered  enough 
through  my  weakness.  Wait  till  to-morrow.  Let  her— poor 
girl ! — have  a  few  more  happy  hours !  " 

"No,  Agnes— it  was  my  own  weakness  which  caused  me 
to  be  surprised  into  this  premature  disclosure  to  you.  And 
now  I  must  meet  her  again  to-night,  and  I  cannot  control 
either  my  features  or  my  feelings.  Yes,  poor  Kate,  she  must 
know  all  to-night!  I  shall  not  be  long  absent,  Agnes." 
And  directing  her  maid  to  remain  with  her  till  he  returned* 


TEN  THOUSAND  A-YEAE.  233 

he  withdrew,  and  with  slow  step  and  heavy  heart  descended 
to  the  library ;  preparing  himself  for  another  heart-breaking 
scene— plunging  another  innocent  and  joyous  creature  into 
misery,  which  he  believed  to  be  inevitable.  Having  looked 
into  the  drawing-room  as  he  passed  it— and  seen  no  one 
there— his  mother  having,  as  usual,  retired  at  a  very  early 
hour— he  rung  his  library  bell,  and  desired  Miss  Aubrey's 
maid  to  request  her  mistress  to  come  down  to  him  there,  as 
soon  as  she  was  at  leisure.  He  was  glad  that  the  only  light 
in  the  room  was  that  given  out  by  the  fire,  which  was  not 
very  bright,  and  so  would  in  some  degree  shield  his  features 
from,  at  all  events,  immediate  scrutiny.  His  heart  ached 
as,  shortly  afterwards,  he  heard  Kate's  light  step  crossing 
the  hall.  When  she  entered,  her  eyes  sparkled  with 
vivacity,  and  a  smile  was  on  her  beauteous  cheek.  Her 
dress  was  slightly  disordered,  and  her  hair  half  uncurled— 
the  result  of  her  sport  with  the  little  ones  whom  she  had 
been  seeing  to  bed. 

"  What  merry  little  things,  to  be  sure ! "  she  commenced 
laughingly—"  I  could  not  get  them  to  lie  still  a  moment — 
popping  their  little  heads  in  and  out  of  the  clothes.  A  fine 
night  I  shall  have  with  Sir  Harry  !  for  he  is  to  be  my  tiny 
little  bedfellow,  and  I  dare  say  I  shall  not  sleep  a  wink  all 
night.  Why,  Charles,  how  very  —  very  grave  you  look 
to-night ! "  she  added  quickly,  observing  his  eye  fixed 
moodily  upon  her. 

" 'Tis  you  who  are  so  very  gay,"  he  replied,  endeavoring  to 
smile.  "I  want  to  speak  to  you,  dear  Kate,"  he  commenced 
affectionately,  "  on  a  serious  matter.  I  have  received  some 
letters  to-night " 

Kate  colored  suddenly  and  violently,  and  her  heart  beat ; 
but, sweet  soul!  she  was  mistaken — very,  very  far  off  the 
mark  her  troubled  brother  was  aiming  at.  "  And  relying  on 
your  strength  of  mind,  I  have  resolved  to  put  you  at  once  in 
possession  of  what  I  myself  know.  Can  you  bear  bad  news 
well,  Kate  ?  " 

She  turned  very  pale,  and  drawing  her  chair  nearer  to  her 
brother,  said,  "  Do  not  keep  me  in  suspense,  Charles— 1  can 
bear  anything  but  suspense— that  is  dreadful !  What  has 
happened?  Oh  dear,  she  added,  with  sudden  alarm, 
"  where  are  mamma  and  Agnes?"  she  started  to  her  feet. 

"  I  assure  you  they  are  both  well,  Kate.  My  mother  is 
now  doubtless  asleep,  and  as  well  as  she  ever  was  ;  Agnes  is 
in  her  bed-room—certainly  much  distressed  at  the  news 
which  I  am  going " 

"  Oh  why,  Charles,  did  you  tell  anything  distressing  to 
her?  '  exclaimed  Miss  Aubrey  with  an  alarmed  air. 

"  We  came  together  by  surprise,  Kate !  Perhaps,  too,  it 
would  have  been  worse  to  have  kept  her  in  suspense  ;  but 
she  is  recovering !— I  shall  soon  return  to  her.— And  now,  my 
dear  Kate— I  know  your  strong  sense  and  spirit— a  very 


234  TEN  THOUSAND  A-YEAP. 

great  calamity  hangs  over  us.  Let  you  and  me,"  he  grasped 
her  hands  affectionately,  "stand  it  steadily,  and  support 
those  who  cannot ! " 

"  Let  me  at  once  know  all,  Charles.  See  if  I  do  not  hear  it 
as  becomes  your  sister,"  she  said  with  forced  calmness. 

"  If  it  should  become  necessary  for  all  of  us  to  retire  into 
obscurity— into  humble  obscurity,  dear  Kate — how  do  you 
think  you  could  bear  it?" 

"  If  it  will  be  an  honorable  obscurity — nay,  'tis  quite  im- 
possible to  be  a  <fts-honorable  obscurity,"  said  Miss  Aubrey 
with  a  momentary  flash  of  energy. 

"  Never,  never,  Kate  !  The  Aubreys  may  lose  everything 
on  earth  but  the  jewel  HONOR,  and  love  for  one  another ! " 

"  Let  me  know  all,  Charles  ;  I  see  that  something  or  other 
shocking  has  happened,"  said  Miss  Aubrey  in  a  low  tone, 
with  a  look  of  the  deepest  apprehension. 

"  I  will  tell  you  the  worst,  Kate — a  strange  claim  is  set  up 
— by  one  I  never  heard  of — to  the  whole  of  the  property  we 
now  enjoy ! " 

"  Miss  Aubrey  started,  and  the  slight  color  that  remained 
faded  entirely  from  her  cheek. 

"  But  is  it  a  true  claim,  Charles  ?  "  she  inquired  faintly. 

"  That  remains  to  be  proved.  But  I  will  disguise  nothing 
from  you— I  have  woful  apprehensions — 

"  Do  you  mean  to  say  that  Yatton  is  not  ours  ! ''  inquired 
Miss  Aubrey,  catching  her  breath. 

"  So,  alas !  my  dearest  Kate,  it  is  said ! " 

Miss  Aubrey  looked  bewildered,  and  pressed  her  hand  to 
her  forehead. 

"  How  shocking ! — shocking !— shocking ! "  she  gasped. — 
"  What  is  to  become  of  mamma  ?  " 

"  God  Almighty  will  not  desert  her  in  her  old  age.  He 
will  desert  none  of  us,  if  we  only  trust  in  him,"  said  her 
brother. 

Miss  Aubrey  remained  gazing  at  him  intently,  and  con- 
tinued  perfectly  motionless. 

"  Must  we  then  all  leave  Yatton  ?  "  said  she,  faintly,  after  a 
while. 

"If  this  claim  succeeds— but  we  shall  leave  it  together, 
Kate." 

She  threw  her  arms  round  his  neck,  and  wept  bitterly. 

"Hush,  hush,  Kate!"  said  he,  perceiving  the  increasing 
violence  ot  her  emotions,  "restrain  your  feelings  for  the  sake 
of  my  mother— and  Agnes." 

His  words  had  the  desired  effect :  the  poor  girl  made  a 
desperate  effort.  Unclasping  her  arms  from  her  brother's 
neck,  she  sat  down  in  a  chair,  breathing  hard  ;  and,  after  a 
few  minutes'  pause,  she  said  faintly,  "  I  am  better  now.  Do 
tell  me  more,  Charles !  Let  me  have  something  to  think 
about— only  don't  say  anything  about— about  mamma  and 


TEN  THOUSAND  A-TEAE.  235 

Agnes ! "  In  spite  of  herself  a  visible  shudder  ran  through 
her  frame. 

"It  seems,  Kate,"  said  he,  with  all  the  calmness  he  could 
assume — "  at  least  they  are  trying  to  prove — that  our  branch 
of  the  family  has  succeeded  "to  the  property  prematurely — 
that  there  is  living  an  heir  of  the  elder  branch — that  his  case 
has  been  taken  up  by  powerful  friends  ;  and — let  me  tell  you 
the  worst  at  once — even  the  lawyers  consulted  by  Mr.  Park- 
inson on  my  behalf,  take  a  most  alarming  view  of  the  possi- 
bilities of  the  case  that  may  be  brought  against  us " 

"But  is  mamma  provided  for?"  whispered  Miss  Aubrey 
almost  inarticulately.  "  When  I  look  at  her  again,  I  shall 
almost  break  my  heart ! " 

"  Xo,  no,  Kate,  you  won't !  Heaven  will  give  you  strength," 
said  her  brother  in  a  tremulous  voice.  "  Remember,  my 
only  sister — my  dearest  Kate !  you  must  support  me  in  my 
trouble,  as  I  will  support  you — we  will  support  one  an- 
other— 

'•  We  will — we  will ! "  interrupted  Miss  Aubrey— instantly 
checking,  however,  her  rising  excitement. 

"  You  bear  it  bravely,  my  noble  girl ! "  said  Mr.  Aubrey 
fondly,  after  a  brief  interval  of  silence. 

She  turned  from  him  her  head,  and  moved  her  hand— in 
deprecation  of  expressions  that  might  utterly  unnerve  her. 
Then  she  convulsively  clasped  her  hands  over  her  forehead  ; 
and,  after  a  minute  or  t\vo,  turned  towards  him  with  tears 
in  her  eyes,  but  tranquillized  features.  The  struggle  had 
been  dreadful,  though  brief — her  noble  spirit  recovered 
itself. 

'Twas  like  some  fair  bark,  in  mortal  conflict  with  the 

black  and  boiling  waters  and  howling  hurricane ;  long 
quivering  on  the  brink  of  destruction,  but  at  last  outliving 
the  storm,  righting  itself,  and  suddenly  gliding  into  safe  and 
tranquil  waters ! 

The  distressed  brother  and  sister  sat  conversing  for  a  long 
time,  frequently  in  tears,  but  with  infinitely  greater  calm- 
ness and  firmness  than  could  have  been  expected.  They 
agreed  that  Dr.  Tatham  should  very  early  in  the  morning  be 
sent  for,  and  implored  to  take  upon  himself  the  bitter  duty 
of  breaking  the  matter  as  gradually  and  safely  as  possible  to 
their  mother;  its  effects  upon  whom,  her  children  antici- 
pated with  the  most  vivid  apprehension.  They  both  con- 
sidered that  an  event  of  such  publicity  and  importance  could 
not  possibly  remain  long  unknown  to  her,  and  that  it  was, 
on  the  whole,  better  that  the  trial  should  be  got  over  as 
soon  as  possible.  They  then  retired— Kate  to  a  sleepless 
pillow,  and  her  brother  to  spend  a  greater  portion  of  the 
night  in  attempts  to  soothe  and  console  his  suffering  wife  ; 
each  of  them  having  first  knelt  in  humble  reverence,  and 
poured  forth  the  breathings  of  a  stricken  and  bleeding  heart 


236  TEN  THOUSAND  A-TEAB. 

before  Him  who  hath  declared  that  he  HEARETH  and  AN. 
SWERETH  prayer. 
Ah !  who  can  tell  what  a  day  or  an  hour  may  bring  forth. 


"  It  won't  kindle— not  a  bit  on' t— it's  green  and  full  o'  sap. 
Go  out  and  get  us  a  log  that's  dry  and  old,  George— and  let's 
try  to  have  a  bit  of  a  blaze  in  t'  ould  chimney,  this  bitter 
night,"  said  Isaac  Tonson,  the  gamekeeper  at  Yatton,  to  the 
good-natured  landlord  of  the  Aubrey  Arms,  the  little— and 
only— inn  of  the  village.  The  suggestion  was  instantly  at- 
tended to. 

"How  Peter's  a-feathering  of  his  geese  to-night,  to  be 
sure ! "  exclaimed  the  landlord  on  his  return,  shaking  the  snow 
off  his  coat,  and  laying  on  the  fire  a  great  dry  old  log  of  wood, 
which  seemed  very  acceptable  to  the  hungry  flames,  for  they 
licked  it  cordially  the  moment  it  was  placed  amongst  them, 
and  there  was  very  soon  given  out  a  cheerful  blaze.  'Twas  a 
snug  room,  the  brick  floor  covered  with  fresh  sand  ;  and  on  a 
few  stools  and  benches,  with  a  table  in  the  middle,  on  which 
stood  a  large  can  and  ale-glasses,  with  a  plate  of  tobacco,  sat 
some  half-dozen  men,  enjoying  their  pipe  and  glass.  In  the 
chimney-corner  sat  Thomas  Dickons,  the  faithful  under- 
bailiff  of  Mr.  Aubrey,  a  big,  broad-shouldered,  middle-aged 
man,  with  a  hard-featured  face  and  a  phlegmatic  air.  In  the 
opposite  corner  sat  the  little  grizzle-headed  clerk  and  sexton, 
old  Halleluiah— (as  he  was  called,  but  his  real  name  was 
Jonas  Higgs.)  Beside  him  sat  Pumpkin,  the  gardener  at  the 
Hall,  a  very  frequent  guest  at  the  Aubrey  Arms  o'  nights— 
always  attended  by  Hector,  the  large  Newfoundland  dog  al- 
ready spoken  of,  and  who  was  now  lying  stretched  on  the 
floor  at  Pumpkin's  feet,  his  nose  resting  on  his  fore  feet,  and 
his  eyes,  with  great  gravity,  watching  the  motions  of  a 
skittish  kitten  under  the  table.  Opposite  to  him  sat  Tonson 
the  gamekeeper— a  thin,  wiry,  beetle-browed  fellow,  with 
eyes  like  a  ferret ;  and  there  were  also  one  or  two  farmers, 
that  lived  in  the  village. 

"  Let's  ha'  another  can  o'  ale,  afore  ye  sit  down,"  said  Ton- 
son,  "  we  can  do  with  another  half-a-gallon,  I'm  thinking ! " 
This  order  also  was  quickly  attended  to  ;  and  then  the  land- 
lord, having  seen  to  tne  door,  and  fastened  the  shutters  close, 
took  his  place  on  a  vacant  stool,  and  resumed  his  pipe. 

''So  she  do  take  a  very  long  grave,  Jonas'?"  inquired 
Dickons,  of  the  sexton,  after  some  little  pause. 

"  Ay,  Mr.  Dickons,  a'  think  she  do,  t'  ould  girl !  I  always 
thought  she  would.  'Tis  a  reg'lar  man's  size,  I  warrant  you  ; 
and  when  parson  saw  it,  a'  said,  he  thought  'twere  too  big; 
but  I  ax'd  his  pardon,  and  said  I  hadn't  been  sexton  for 
thirty  years  without  knowing  my  business— ha,  ha!  '' 


TEN  THOUSAND  A-YEAS.  237 

"  I  suppose,  Jonas,  you  mun  ha'  seen  her  walking  about  i' 
t'  village,  in  your  time —  Were  she  such  a  big-looking  woman  ?" 
inquired  Pumpkin,  as  he  shook  the  ashes  out  of  his  pipe,  and 
replenished  it. 

"  Forty  years  ago  I  used  to  see  her — she  were  then  an  old 
woman,  wi'  white  hair,  and  leaned  on  a  stick — I  never 
thought  she'd  a  lasted  so  long,"  replied  Higgs,  emptying  his 
glass. 

"  She've  had  a  pretty  long  spell  on't,"  quoth  Dickons,  after 
slowly  emptying  nis  mouth  of  smoke. 

"  A  hundred  and  two,"  replied  the  sexton  ;  "  so  saith  her 
coffin-plate— a'  seed  it  to-day." 

''What  were  her  name?"  inquired  Tonson— "7"  never 
knew  her  by  any  name  but  blind  Bess." 

"  Her  name  be  Elizabeth  Crabtree,  on  the  coffin,"  replied 
Higgs  ;  "  and  she's  to  be  buried  to-morrow." 

She  were  a  strange  old  woman,"  said  Hazel,  one  of  the 
farmers,  as  he  took  down  one  of  the  oatcakes  that  were  hang- 
ing overhead,  and  breaking  off  a  piece,  held  it  with  the  tongs 
before  the  fire  to  toast,  and  then  put  it  into  his  ale. 

"  Ay,  she  were,"  quoth  Pumpkin ;  "  I  wonder  what  she 
thinks  o'  such  things  now — maybe  she's  paying  dear  for  her 
tricks !  " 

"  Tut,  Pumpkin,"  said  Tonson,  "  let  t'  ould  creature  rest  in 
her  grave  peaceably !  " 

"  Ay,  Master  Tonson,"  quoth  the  clerk,  in  his  reading-desk 
twang—"  there  be  no  knowledge,  nor  wisdom,  nor  device  !  " 

"  Tis  very  odd,"  observed  Pumpkin,  "  but  this  dog  that's 
lying  at  my  feet  never  could  a'  bear  going  past  her  cottage 
late  o'  nights ;  and  the  night  she  died — Lord !  you  should 
have  heard  the  howl  Hector  gave— and  a'  didn't  then  know 
she  were  gone." 

"  No !  but  were't  really  so  ?  "  inquired  Dickson— several  of 
the  others  taking  their  pipes  out  of  their  mouths,  and  look- 
ing earnestly  at  Pumpkin". 

I  didn't  half  like  it,  I  assure  you,"  quoth  Pumpkin. 

"  Ha,  ha,  ha !— ha,  ha  !  "  laughed  the  gamekeeper— 

"  Ay,  marry  you  may  laugh— but  I'll  stake  half-a-gallon  o' 
ale  you  daren't  go  by  yourself  to  the  cottage  where  she's  ly- 
ing— now,  mind— i'  the  dark." 

,  "  I'll  do  it,"  quoth  Higgs  eagerly,  preparing  to  lay  down 
his  pipe. 

"  No,  no—thoti'rt  quite  used  to  dead  folk,"  replied  Pump- 
kin—and, after  a  little  faint  drollery,  they  dropped  into 
silence. 

"  Bess  dropped  off  sudden,  like,  at  last,  didn't  she  ?  "  inquir- 
ed the  landlord. 

"  She  went  out,  as  they  say,  like  the  snuff  of  a  candle,"  re- 
plied Jobbins,  one  of  the  farmers  ;  "  no  one  were  with  her 
but  my  Missus  at  the  time.  The  night  afore  she  took  to  the 
rattles  all  of  a  sudden.  My  Sail  (that's  done  for  her  this 


238  TEN  THOUSAND  A-YEAU. 

long  time,  by  madam's  orders)  says  old  Bess  were  a  good 
deal  shaken  by  a  chap  from  London,  that  came  down  about 
a  week  before  Christmas." 

"  Ay,  ay,"  quoth  one,  "  I've  heard  o'  that— what  was  it  ?— 
what  passed  atwixt  them  ?" 

"  Wny,  a'  don't  well  know— but  he  seemed  to  know  sum- 
mat  about  t'  ould  girl's  connections,  and  he  had  a  book,  and 
wrote  down  something ;  and  he  axed  her,  so  Sail  do  tell  me, 
such  a  many  things  about  old  people,  and  things  that  are 
long  gone  by  ! " 

"  What  were  the  use  on't?"  inquired  Dickons ;  "  for  Bess 
hath  been  silly  this  ten  years,  to  my  sartain  knowledge." 

"  Why,  a'  couldn't  tell.  He  seemed  very  'quisitive,  too, 
about  t'  old  creature's  bible  and  prayer-book  (she  kept  'em  in 
that  ould  bag  of  hers)— and  Sail  said  she  talked  a  good  deal 
to  the  chap  in  her  mumbling  way,  and  seemed  to  know  some 
folk  he  asked  her  about.  And  Sail  saith  she  hath  been,  in  a 
manner,  dismal  ever  since,  and  often  a-crying  and  talking  to 
herself." 

"  I've  heard,"  said  the  landlord,  "  that  squire  and  parson 
were  wi'  her  on  Christmas-day— and  that  she  talked  a  deal  o' 
strange  things,  and  that  the  squire  did  seem,  as  it  were, 
struck  a  little,  you  know — struck,  like !  " 

•'  Why,  so  my  Sail  do  say ;  but  it  may  be  all  her  own  head," 
replied  Jobbins. 

Here  a  pause  took  place. 

"Madam,"  said  the  sexton,  "hath  given  orders  for  a  decent 
burying  to-morrow." 

"  Well,  a'  never  thought  any  wrong  of  ould  Bess,  for  my 
part,"  said  one— and  another— and  another ;  and  they  smoked 
their  pipes  for  some  minutes  in  silence. 

"  Talking  o'  strangers  from  London,"  said  the  sexton  pres- 
ently ;  "  who  do  know  anything  o'  them  two  chaps  that  were 
at  church  last  Sunday  ?  Two  such  peacock  chaps  I  never 
seed  afore  in  my  time — and  grinning  all  service  time !  " 

'•  Ay,  I'll  tell  you  something  of  'em,"  said  Hazel— a  big 
broad-shouldered  farmer,  who  plucked  his  pipe  out  of  his 
mouth  with  sudden  energy — "They're  a  brace  o'  good  ones, 
to  be  sure,  ha,  ha !  Some  week  or  ten  days  ago,  as  I  were  a- 
coming  across  the  field  leading  into  the  lane  behind  the 
church,  I  seed  these  same  two  chaps,  and  on  coming  nearer, 
(they  not  seeing  me  for  the  hedge,)  Lord  bless  me !  would  ye 
believe  it?— if  they  wasn't  a-teasing  my  daughter  Jenny, 
that  were  coming  along  wi'  some  physic  from  the  doctor  for 
my  old  woman !  One  of  'em  seemed  a-going  to  put  his  arm 
round  her  neck,  and  t'other  came  close  to  her  on  t'other  side, 
a-talking  to  her  and  pushing  her  about."  Here  a  young 
farmer,  who  had  but  seldom  spoken,  took  his  pipe  out  of  his 
mouth  and  exclaiming,  "  Lord  bless  me ! "  sat  listening  with 
his  mouth  wide  open.  "Well,  a'  came  into  the  road  behind 
'em,  without  their  seeing  me ;  and  "—(here  he  stretched  out 


TEN  THOUSAND  A-YEAR.  239 

a  thick,  rigid,  muscular  arm,  and  clenched  his  teeth)—"  a' 
got  hold  of  each  by  the  collar,  and  one  of  'em  I  shook  about, 
and  gave  him  a  kick  i'  the  breech  that  sent  him  spinning  a 
yard  or  two  cm.  the  road,  he  clapping  his  hand  behind  him, 
and  crying,  to  be  sure — '  You'll  smart  for  this— a  good  hun- 
dred pound  damages ! '  or  summat  o'  that  sort.  T'other 
dropped  on  his  knees,  and  begged  for  mercy  ;  so  a'  just  spit 
in  his  face,  and  flung  him  under  t'  hedge,  telling  him  if  he 
stirred  till  I  were  out  o'  sight,  I'd  crack  his  skull  for  him  ; 
and  so  I  would !  "  Here  the  wrathful  speaker  pushed  his 
pipe  again  between  his  lips,  and  began  puffing  away  with  great 
energy ;  while  he  who  had  appeared  to  take  so  great  an  in- 
terest in  the  story,  and  who  was  the  very  man  who  had  flown 
to  the  rescue  of  Miss  Aubrey,  when  she  seemed  on  the  point 
of  being  similarly  treated,  told  that  circumstance  exactly  as 
it  occurred,  amidst  the  silent  but  excited  wonder  of  those 
present— all  of  whom,  at  its  close,  uttered  vehement  exe- 
crations, and  intimated  the  summary  and  savage  punish- 
ment which  the  cowardly  rascal  would  have  experienced  at 
the  hands  of  each  and  every  one  of  them,  had  they  come 
across  him. 

"  I  reckon,"  said  the  landlord,  as  soon  as  the  swell  had  a 
little  subsided,  "  they  must  be  the  two  chaps  that  put  up 
here,  some  time  ago,  lor  an  hour  or  so.  You  should  ha'  seen 
'em  get  on  and  off  the  saddle— that's  all !  Why,  a'  laughed 
outright !  The  chap  with  the  hair  under  his  chin  got  on 
upon  the  wrong  side,  and  t'other  seemed  as  if  he  thought 
his  beast  would  a'  bit  him  !  " 

"  Ha,  ha,  ha ! "  laughed  all. 

"  I  thought  they'd  a'  both  got  a  fall  before  they'd  gone  a 
dozen  yards !  " 

"  They've  taken  a  strange  fancy  to  my  churchyard,"  said 
the  sexton,  setting  down  his  glass,  and  then  preparing  to  fill 
his  pipe  again  ;  "  they've  been  looking  about  among  'em — 
among  t'  ould  gravestones,  up  behind  t'  ould  yew-tree,  yon- 
der ;  and  one  of  them  writ  something,  now  and  then,  in  a 
book ;  so  they're  book- writers,  in  coorse !  " 

"  That's  scholars,  I  reckon,"  quoth  Dickons ;  "  but  rot  the 
laming  of  such  chaps  as  them ! " 

"  I  wonder  if  they'll  put  a  picture  o'  the  Hall  in  their 
book,"  quoth  the  sexton.  "  They  axed  a  many  questions 
about  the  people  up  there,  especially  about  the  squire  s  father, 
and  some  ould  folk,  whose  names  I  knew  when  they  spoke 
of  'em — but  I  hadn't  heard  o'  them  for  this  forty  year.  And 
one  of  'em  (he  were  the  shortest,  and  such  a  chap,  to  be  sure ! 
— just  like  the  monkey  that  were  dressed  i'  the  man's  clothes 
last  Grilston  fair)  talked  uncommon  fine  about  young 
Miss " 

"  If  Td  a  heard  him  tak'  her  name  into  his  dirty  mouth,  his 
teeth  should  a'  gone  after  it !  "  said  Tonson, 

"  Lord  I   he    didn't  say   any  harm— only  silly-like— and. 


240  TEN  THOUSAND  A-YEAR. 

t'other  seemed  now  and  then  not  to  like  his  going  on  so.  The 
little  one  said  Miss  were  a  lovely  gal,  or  something  like  that 
and  hoped  they'd  become  by-and-by  better  friends — ah,  ha !  " 

"  What !  wi'  that  chap  ?  "  said  Pumpkin— and  he  looked  as 
if  he  were  meditating  putting  the  little  sexton  up  the  chim- 
ney, for  the  mere  naming  of  such  a  thing. 

"  I  reckon  they're  fro'  London,  and  brought  tpon  tricks  wi' 
'  'em — for  I  never  heard  o'  such  goings  on  as  theirs  down  here 
\  afore,"  said  Tonson. 

'  "One  of  'em— him  that  axed  me  all  the  questions,  and 
wrote  i'  t'  book,  seemed  a  sharp  enough  chap  in  his  way ; 
but  I  can't  say  much  for  the  little  one,  said  Higgs.  "  Lud, 
I  couldn't  hardly  look  in  his  face  for  laughing,  he  seemed 
such  a  fool !—  He  had  a  riding-whip  wi'  a  silver  head,  and 
stood  smacking  his  legs  (you  should  ha'  seen  how  tight  his 
clothes  was  on  his  legs — I  warrant  you,  Tim  Timkins  never 
seed  such  a  thing,  I'll  be  sworn)  all  the  while,  as  if  a'  liked  to 
hear  the  sound  of  it." 

"If  I'd  a'  been  beside  him,"  said  Hazel,  "  I'd  a  saved  him 
that  trouble — only  I'd  a'  laid  it  into  another  part  of  him !  " 

"  Ha,  ha,  ha ! "  they  laughed— and  presently  passed  on  to 
other  matters. 

"  Hath  the  squire  been  doing  much  lately  in  Parliament  ?  " 
inquired  the  sexton  of  Dickons. 

"  Why,  yes— he's  trying  hard  to  get  that  new  road  made 
from  Harkley  bridge  to  Hilton." 

"  Ah,  that  would  save  a  good  four  mile,  if  a'  could  man- 
age it ! " 

"  I  hear  the  Papists  are  trying  to  get  the  upper  hand  again 
which  the  Lud  forbid !  "  said  the  sexton,  after  another  pause. 

"  The  squire  hath  lately  made  a  speech  in  that  matter,  that 
hath  finished  them,"  said  Dickons. 

"  What  would  they  be  after  ? "  inquired  the  landlord  of 
Dickons,  of  whom,  in  common  with  all  present,  he  thought 
great  things. 

"  They  say  they  wants  nothing  but  what's  their  own,  and 
liberty,  and  that  like " 

"  If  thou  wert  a  shepherd,  Master  Higgs,"  replied  Dickons, 
"  and  wert  to  be  asked  by  ten  or  dozen  wolves  to  let  them 
in  among  thy  flock  of  sheep,  they  saying  how  quiet  and  kind 
they  would  be  to  'em— would'st  let  'em  in,  or  keep  'em  out— 
eh?" 

"  Ay,  ay— that  be  it— 'tis  as  true  as  gospel !  "  said  the  clerk. 

"Soyoua'n't  to  have  that  old  sycamore  down,  after  alL, 
Master  Dickons  ?"  inquired  Tonson. 

"  No ;  miss  hath  carried  the  day  against  the  squire  and  Mr. 
Waters ;  and  there  stands  the  old  tree,  and  it  hath  to  be 
looked  better  after  than  it  were  afore." 

"Why  hath  miss  taken  such  a  fancy  to  it?    'Tis  an  old 
crazy  thing." 
.  "  If  thou  hadst  been  there  when  she  did  beg,  as  I  may  say, 


TEN  THOUSAND  A-YEAR.  241 

its  life,"  implied  Dickons,  with  a  little  energy—"  and  hadst 
seen  her,  and  heard  her  voice,  that  be  as  smooth  as  cream, 
thou  would'sst  never  have  forgotten  it,  I  can  tell  thee  ! " 

"  There  isn't  a  more  beautiful  lady  i'  th'  country,  I  reckon, 
than  the  squire's  sister?"  inquired  the  sexton. 

"No,  nor  in  all  England  :  it  there  be,  I'll  lay  down  a  hun- 
dred pounds." 

"And  where's  to  be  found  a  young  lady  that  do  go  about 
i' t'  village  like  she  ?— She  were  wi'  Phrebe  Williams  t'other 
night,  all  through  the  snow,  and  i'  t'  dark." 

"If  I'd  only  laid  hands  on  that  chap!"  interrupted  the 
young  farmer,  her  rescuer. 

"  I  wonder  she  do  not  choose  some  one  to  be  married  to,  up 
in  London,"  said  the  landlord. 

"  She'll  be  having  some  delicate  high  quality  chap,  I 
reckon,  one  o'  these  fine  days,"  said  Hazel." 

"  She  will  be  a  dainty  dish,  truly,  for  whomever  God  gives 
her  to,"  quoth  Dickons. 

"Ay,  she  will,"  said  more  than  one,  in  an  earnest  tone. 

"  Now,  to  my  mind,"  said  Tonson,  "  saving  your  presence, 
Master  Dickons,  I  know  not  but  young  madam  be  more  to 
my  taste ;  she  be  in  a  manner  somewhat  fuller — plumper-like, 
and  her  skin  be  so  white,  and  her  hair  as  black  as  a  raven's." 

"  There's  not  another  two  such  women  to  be  found  in  the 
whole  world,"  said  Dickons  authoritatively.  Here  Hector 
suddenly  rose  up,  and  went  to  the  door,  where  he  stood 
snuffing  in  an  inquisitive  manner. 

"Now,  what  do  that  dog  hear,  I  wonder?"  quoth  Pumpkin 
curiously,  stooping  forward. 

"Blind  Bess,"  replied  Tonson,  winking  his  eye,  and 
laughing.  Presently  there  was  a  sharp  rapping  at  the  door ; 
Avhich  the  landlord  opened,  and  let  in  one  of  the  servants 
from  the  Hall,  his  clothes  white  with  snow,  his  face  nearly 
as  white,  with  manifest  agitation. 

"Why,  man,  what's  the  matter?"  inquired  Dickons, 
startled  by  the  man's  appearance.  "  Art  frightened  at  any- 
thing ?  " 

"  Oh,  Lord  !  oh,  Lord ! "  he  commenced. 

"  What  is  it,  man  ?  Art  drunk  ? — or  mad  ? — or  frightened? 
Take  a  drop  o'  drink,"  said  Tonson.  But  the  man  refused  it. 

"  Oh,  my  friends,  sad  work  at  the  Hall !  " 

"  What's  the  matter  ?  "  cried  all  at  once,  rising  and  standing 
round  the  new  comer. 

"  If  thou  be'st  drunk,  John,"  said  Dickons  sternly,  "  there's 
a  way  of  sobering  thee— mind  that." 

"Oh,  Master  Dickons,  I  don't  know  what's  come  to  me, 
for  grief  and  fright !  The  Squire,  they  do  say,  and  all  of  us, 
are  to  be  turned  out  o'  Yatton ! " 

"  What!  "  exclaimed  all  in  a  breath. 
There's  some  one  else  lays  claim  to  it.    We  must  all  go! 


242  TEN  THOUSAND  A-YEAE. 

Oh,  Lud !  9h,  Lud ! "    No  one  spoKe  for  near  a  minute ;  and 
consternation  was  written  on  every  face. 

"  Sit  thee  down  here,  John,"  said  Dickons  at  length,  "  and 
let  us  hear  \vhat  thou  hast  to  say — or  thou  wilt  have  us  all 
be  going  up  in  a  body  to  the  Hall. 

Having  forced  on  him  part  of  a  glass  of  ale,  he  began, — 
"  There  hath  been  plainly  mischief  brewing,  somewhere,  this 
many  days,  as  I  could  tell  by  the  troubled  face  o'  the  squire ; 
but  he  kept  it  to  himself.  Lawyer  Parkinson  and  another 
have  been  latterly  coming  in  chaises  from  London ;  and  last 
night  the  squire  got  a  letter  that  seems  to  have  finished  all. 
Such  trouble  there  were  last  night  with  the  squire,  and 
young  madam  and  miss  !  And  to-day  the  parson  came,  and 
were  a  long  while  alone  with  old  Madam  Aubrey,  who  hath 
since  had  a  stroke,  or  a  fit,  or  something  of  that  like,  (the 
doctors  have  been  there  all  day  from  Grilstqn,)  and  likewise 
young  madam  hath  taken  to  her  bed,  and  is  ill." 

"  And  what  of  the  squire  and  miss  ? "  inquired  some  one, 
after  all  had  maintained  a  long  silence. 

"  Oh,  'Uvould  break  your  heart  to  see  them,"  said  the  man, 
bursting  into  tears :  they  are  both  as  pale  as  death :  he 
so  dreadful  sorrowful,  but  quiet,  like,  and  she  now  and 
then  wringing  her  hands,  and  both  them  going  from  the 
bed-room  of  old  madam  to  young  madam's.  Nay,  an' 
there  had  been  half-a-dozen  deaths  i'  th'  house,  it  could  not 
be  worse.  Neither  the  squire  nor  miss  hath  touched  food 
the  whole  day !  " 

There  was,  in  truth,  not  a  dry  eye  in  the  room,  nor  one 
whose  voice  did  not  seem  somewhat  obstructed  with  his  emo- 
tions. 

"Who  told  thee  about  the  squire's  losing  the  estate  ?"  in* 
quired  Dickons. 

"  We  heard  of  it  but  an  hour  or  so,  agone.  Mr.  Parkinson 
(it  seems  by  the  squire's  orders)  told  Mr.  Waters,  and  he 
told  it  to  us ;  saying  as  how  it  was  useless  to  keep  such  a 
thing  secret,  and  that  we  might  all  know  the  occasion  of  so 
much  trouble. 

"Who's  to  ha'  it  then,  instead  of  the  squire?"  at  length 
inquired  Tonson,  in  a  voice  half  choked  with  rage  and 
grief. 

"Lord  only  knows  at  present.  But  whoever  'tis,  there 
isn't  one  of  us  sarvants  but  will  go  with  the  squire  and  his 
—if  it  be  even  to  prison,  that  I  can  tell  ye." 

I'm  Squire  Aubrey's  gamekeeper,"  quoth  Tonson,  his  eye 
kindling  as  his  countenance  darkened,  "  and  no  one's  else .' 
It  shall  go  hard  if  any  one  else  hath  a  game— 

"But  if  there's  law  in  the  land,  sure  the  justice  must 
be  wi'  t'  squire— he  and  his  family  have  had  it  so  long,''  said 
one  of  the  farmers. 

"  I'll  tell  you  what,  masters,"  said  Pumpkin  mysteriously, 


TEN  THOUSAND  A-TEAE.  243 

"  I  shall  be  somewhat  better  pleased  when  Jonas  here  hath 
got  that  old  creature  Bess  safe  underground." 

"  Blind  Bess,  ?  "  exclaimed  Tonson,  with  a  very  serious. 
not  to  say  disturbed,  countenance.  "  I  wonder  —  sure  !  sure  ! 
that  ould  witch  can  have  had  no  hand  in  all  this  - 

"  Poor  old  soul,  not  she  !  There  be  no  such  things  as 
witches  now-a-days,"  exclaimed  Jonas.  "  Not  she,  I  warrant 
me  !  She  hath  been  ever  befriended  by  the  squire's  family. 
do  do  it!" 


"  The  sooner  we  get  her  underground,  for  all  that,  the 
better,  say  I!"  quoth  Tonson,  striking  his  hand  on  the 
table. 

•'  The  parson  hath  a  choice  sermon  on  '  The  Flying  away 
of  Riches,'  "  said  Higgs  in  a  quaint,  sad  manner  ;  "  'tis  to  be 
hoped  he'll  preach  from  it  next  Sunday  !  -  " 

Soon  after  this,  the  little  party  dispersed,  each  oppressed 
with  greater  grief  and  amazement  than  he  had  ever  known 
before.  Bad  news  fly  swiftly—  and  that  which  had  just  come 
from  the  Hall,  within  a  very  few  hours  of  its  having  been 
told  at  the  Aubrey  Arms,  had  spread  grief  and  consterna- 
tion among  high  and  low  for  many  miles  round  Yatton. 


CHAPTER  X. 

WOULD  you  have  believed  it  ?  Notwithstanding  all  that 
had  happened  between  Titmouse  and  Tag-rag,  they  positive- 
ly got  reconciled  to  one  another— a  triumphant  result  of  the 
astute  policy  of  Mr.  Gammon.  As  soon  as  he  had  heard  Tit- 
mouse's infuriated  account  of  his  ignominious  expulsion 
from  Satin  Lodge,  he  burst  into  a  fit  of  hearty  but  gentle 
laughter  which  at  length  subsided  into  an  inward  chuckle 
that  lasted  the  rest  of  the  day ;  and  which  was  occasioned, 
first,  by  gratification  at,  the  impression  which  his  own  sagac- 
ity had  evidently  produced  upon  the  powerful  mind  of  Tit- 
mouse ;  secondly,  by  an  exquisite  appreciation  of  the  min- 
gled meanness  and  stupidity  of  Tag-rag.  I  do  not  mean  it  to 
be  understood,  that  Titmouse  had  given  Mr.  Gammon  such 
a,  terse  and  clear  account  of  the  matter  as  I  imagine  myself 
to  have  given  to  my  reader  ;  but  still  he  told  quite  enough  to 
put  Mr.  Gammon  in  full  possession  of  the  true  state  01  the 
case.  Good  :  but  then—instantly  reflected  Gammon— what 
are  we  now  to  do  with  Titmouse  ? — where  was  that  trouble- 
some little  ape  to  be  caged,  till  it  suited  the  purposes  of  his 
proprietors  (as  Messrs.  Quirk,  Gammon,  and  Snap  might 
surely  be  called,  for  they  had  caught  him,  hpwever  they  might 
fail  to  tame  him)  to  let  him  loose  upon  society,  to  amuse  and 
astonish  it  by  his  antics  ?— That  was  the  question  occupying 


244  TEN  THOUSAND  A-YEAE. 

the  thoughts  of  Mr.  Gammon  while  his  calm,  clear,  gray  eye 
was  fixed  upon  Titmouse,  apparently  very  attentive  to' what 
he  was  saying.  That  gentleman  had  first  told  the  story  of 
his  wrongs  to  Snap,  who  instantly,  rubbing  his  hands,  sug- 
gested an  indictment  at  the  Clerkenwell  sessions— an  idea 
which  infinitely  delighted  Titmouse,  but  was  somewhat  stern- 
ly "  pooh-pooh-pooed ! "  by  Mr.  Gammon  as  soon  as  he  heard 
of  it,— Snap  thereat  shrugging  his  shoulders  with  a  discon- 
certed air,  but  a  bitter  sneer  upon  his  sharp,  hard  face.  Like 
many  men  of  little  but  active  minds,  early  drilled  to  partic- 
ular callings,  Snap  was  equal  to  the  mechanical  conduct  of 
business— the  mere  working  of  the  machinery — but,  as  the 
phrase  is,  could  never  see  an  inch  beyond  his  nose.  Every 
petty  conjuncture  of  circumstances  that  admitted  of  litiga- 
tion, at  once  suggested  its  expediency,  without  reference  to 
other  considerations,  or  connection  with,  or  subordination 
to,  any  general  purpose  or  plan  of  action.  A  creature  of 
small  impulses,  he  had  no  idea  of  foregoing  a  momentary 
advantage  to  secure  an  ulterior  object— which,  in  fact,  he 
could  not  keep  for  a  moment  before  his  thoughts,  so  as  to 
have  any  influence  on  his  movements.  What  a  different  man 
now,  was  Gammon ! 

To  speak  after  the  manner  of  physiologists,  several  of  my 
characters — Titmouse,  Tag-rag  (with  his  amiable  wife  and 
daughter),  Huckaback,  Snap,  and  old  Quirk  himself— may  be 
looked  on  as  reptiles  of  a  low  order  in  the  scale  of  being, 
whose  simple  structures  almost  one  dash  of  the  knife  would 
suffice  to  lay  thoroughly  open.  Gammon,  however,  I  look 
upon  as  of  a  much  higher  order ;  possessing  a  far  more  com- 
plicated structure,  adapted  to  the  discharge  of  superior  func- 
tions ;  and  who,  consequently,  requireth  a  more  careful  dis- 
section. But  let  it  not  be  supposed  that  I  have  yet  done 
with  any  of  my  characters. 

Gammon  saw  that  Tag-rag,  under  proper  management, 
might  be  made  very  useful.  He  was  a  moneyed  man ;  a 
selfish  man  ;  and,  after  his  sort,  an  ambitious  man.  He  had 
an  only  child,  a  daughter,  and  if  Titmouse  and  he  could  only 
be  by  any  means  once  more  brought  together,  and  a  firm 
friendship  cemented  between  them,  Gammon  saw  several 
very  profitable  uses  to  which  such  an  intimacy  might  be  turn- 
ed, in  the  happening  of  any  of  several  contingencies  which 
he  contemplated  as  possible.  In  the  event,  for  instance,  of 
larger  outlays  of  money  being  required  than  suited  the  con- 
venience of  the  firm— could  not  Tag-rag  be  easily  brought 
to  accommodate  his  future  son-in-law  of  £10,000  a-year? 
Suppose,  for  instance,  that  after  all  their  case  should  break 
down,  and  all  their  pains,  exertions,  and  expenditure  be  utter- 
ly thrown  away  ?  Now,  if  Tag-rag  could  be  quietly  brought 
some  fine  day,  to  the  point  of  either  making  some  actual 
advance,  or  entering  into  security  for  Titmouse —  ah. !  that 
would  do,  said  both  Quirk  and  Gammon.  But  then  Titmouse 


TEN  THOUSAND  A-YEAR.  245 

was  a  very  unsafe  instrument — an  incalculable  fool,  and 
might  commit  himself  too  far  ! 

;'  You  forget,  Gammon,"  said  old  Mr.  Quirk.  "  I  don't  fear 
this  girl  of  Tag-rag's— because  only  let  Titmouse  see — hem," 
he  suddenly  paused,  and  looked  a  little  confused. 

"  To  be  sure — I  see,"  replied  Gammon  quietly,  and  the 
thing  passed  off.  "  If  either  Miss  Quirk  or  Miss  Tag-rag  be- 
comes Mrs.  Titmouse,"  thought  he,  "  I  am  not  the  man  I 
take  myself  for." 

'  A  few  days  after  Titmouse's  expulsion  from  Satin  Lodge, 
without  his  having  ever  gone  near  Tag-rag's  premises  in  Ox- 
ford Street,  or,  in  short,  seen  or  heard  anything  about  him, 
or  any  one  connected  with  him,  he  removed  to  small  but  very 
respectable  lodgings  in  the  neighborhood  of  Hatton  Garden, 
provided  for  him  by  Mr.  Quirk.  Mrs.  Squallop  was  quite  affect- 
ed-while  she  took  leave  of  Titmouse,  who  gave  her  son  six- 
pence to  take  his  two  boxes  down-stairs  to  the  hackney  coach 
drawn  up  opposite  to  the  entrance  of  Closet  Court. 

"I've  always  felt  like  a  mother  towards  you,  sir,  in  my 
humble  way,"  said  Mrs.  Squallop  in  a  very  respectful  man- 
ner, and  curtesying  profoundly. 

"  A— I've  not  got  any  small  silver  by  me,  my  good  woman," 
Titmouse  with  a  fine  air,  as  he  drew  on  his  white  kid  glove. 

"  Lord,  Mr.  Titmouse  ! "  said  the  woman,  almost  bursting 
into  tears,  "I  wasn't  asking  for  money,  neither  for  me  nor 
mine—  only  one  can't  help,  as  it  were,  feeling  at  parting 
with  an  old  lodger,  you  know,  sir — 

"  Ah— ya— as— and  all  that !  Well,  my  good  woman,  good- 
day,  good-day." 

"  Good-bye,  sir— God  bless  you  ;  now  you're  going  to  be  a 
rich  man  !— Excuse  me,  sir." — And  she  seized  his  hand  and 
shook  it. 

"  You're  a— devilish— impudent— woman — 'pon  my  soul !" 
exclaimed  Titmouse,  his  features  filled  with  amazement  at 
the  presumption  of  which  she  had  been  guilty  ;  and  he 
strode  down  the  stairs  with  an  air  of  offended  dignity. 

"  Well— I  never  !—  That  for  you,  you  little  brute,"  said 
Mrs.  Squallop,  snapping  her  fingers  as  soon  as  she  had  heard 
his  last  step  on  the  stairs—"  Kind  or  cruel,  it's<  all  one  to 
you,  you're  a  nasty  jackanapes,  only  fit  to  stand  in  a  tailor's 
window  to  show  his  clothes— and  I'll  be  sworn  you'll  come 
to  no  good  in  the  end !  Let  you  be  rich  as  you  may,  you'll 
always  be  the  fool  you  always  were ! " 

Had  the  good  woman  been  familiar  with  the  Night 
Thoughts  of  Young,  she  might  have  expressed  herself  some- 
what  tersely  in  a  line  of  his — 

"  Pigmies  are  pigmies  still,  though  perch'd  on  Alps," 

And,  by  the  way,  who  can  read  the  next  line— 
f, ..  "  And  pyramids  are  pyramids  in  vales," 


246  TEX  THOUSAND  A-YEAR. 

Without  thinking  for  a  moment,  with  a  kind  of  proud 
sympathy,  of  certain  other  characters  in  this  history  ?  well ! 
but  let  us  pass  on. 

The  day  after  that  on  which  Mr.  Gammon  had  had  a  long 
interview  with  Titmouse,  at  the  new  lodgings  of  the  latter,— 
when,  after  a  very  skilful  effort,  he  had  succeeded  in  recon- 
ciling Titmouse  to  a  renewal  of  his  acquaintance  with  Tag- 
rag,  upon  that  gentleman's  making  a  complete  and  abject 
apology  for  his  late  monstrous  conduct,  Mr.  Gammon 
wended  his  way  towards  Oxford  Street,  and  soon  introduced 
himself  once  more  to  Mr.  Tag-rag,  who  was  standing  leaning 
against  one  of  the  counters  in  his  shop  in  a  musing  position, 
with  a  pen  behind  his  ear,  and  his  hands  in  his  breeches 
pockets.  Ten  days  had  elapsed  since  he  had  expelled  the 
little  impostor  Titmouse  from  Satin  Lodge,  and  during  that 
interval  ne  had  neither  seen  nor  heard  anything  whatever 
of  him.  On  now  catching  the  first  glimpse  of  Mr.  Gammon, 
he  started  from  his  musing  posture,  not  a  little  disconcerted, 
and  agitation  overspread  his  coarse  deeply-pitted  face  with  a 
tallowy  hue.  What  was  in  the  wind !  Mr.  Gammon  coming 
to  him,  so  long  after  what  had  occurred?  Mr.  Gammon 
who,  having  found  out  his  error,  had  discarded  Titmouse  ! 
Tag-rag  had  a  mortal  dread  of  Gammon,  who  seemed  to  him 
to  glide  like  a  dangerous  snake  into  the  shop,  so  quietly,  and 
so  deadly  !  There  was  something  so  calm  and  imperturbable 
in  his  demeanor,  so  blandly  crafty,  so  oniinpusly  gentle  and 
soft  in  the  tone  of  his  voice,  so  penetrating  in  his  eye,  and  he 
could  throw  such  an  infernal  smile  over  his  features  !  Tag- 
rag  might  be  likened  to  the  ox,  suddenly  shuddering  as  he 
perceives  the  glistening  folds  of  the  rattlesnake  noiselessly 
moving  towards,  or  around  him,  in  the  long  grass.  One 
glimpse  of  his  blasting  beauty  of  hue,  and— Horror !  all  is 
over. 

If  the  splendid  bubble  of  Titmouse's  fortune  had  burst  in 
the  manner  which  he  had  represented,  why  Gammon  here 
now  ?  thought  Tag-rag.  It  was  with,  in  truth,  a  very  poor 
show  of  contempt  and  defiance  that,  in  answer  to  the  bland 
salutation  of  Gammon,  he  led  the  way  down  the  shop  into 
the  little  room  which  had  been  the  scene  of  such  an  extraor- 
dinary communication  concerning  Titmouse  on  a  former 
occasion. 

Gammon  commenced,  in  a  mild  tone,  with  a  very  startling 
representation  of  the  criminal  liability  which  Tag-rag  had 
incurred  by  his  wanton  outrage  upon  Mr.  Titmouse,  his  own 
guest,  in  violation  of  all  the  laws  of  hospitality.  Tag-rag 
furiously  alleged  the  imposition  which  had  been  practised 
on  him  by  Titmouse  ;  but  seemed  quite  collapsed  when  Gam- 
mon  assured  him  that  the  circumstance  would  not  afford 
him  the  slightest  justification.  Having  satisfied  Tag-rag 
that  he  was  entirely  at  the  mercy  of  Titmouse,  who  might 
subject  him  to  both  fine  and  imprisonment,  Mr.  Gammon. 


TEN  THOUSAND  A  YEAR.  247 

proceeded  to  open  his  eyes  to  their  widest  stare  of  amaze- 
ment by  assuring  him  that  Titmouse  had  been  hoaxing  him, 
and  that  he  was'really  in  the  dazzling  position  in  which  he 
had  been  first  represented  by  Gammon  to  Tag-rag ;  that 
every  week  brought  him  nearer  to  the  full  and  uncontrolled 
enjoyment  of  an  estate  in  Yorkshire,  worth  £10,000  a  year  at 
the  very  lowest ;  that  it  was  becoming  an  object  of  increas- 
ing anxiety  to  them  (Messrs.  Quirk,  Gammon,  and  Snap),  to 
keep  him  out  of  the  hands  of  money-lenders,  who,  as  usual 
in  such  cases,  had  already  scented  out  their  victim,  and  so 
forth. — Tag-rag  turned  very  white,  and  felt  sick  at  heart  in 
the  midst  of  all  his  wonder.  Oh,  and  his  daughter  had  lost 
the  golden  prize !  and  through  his  misconduct !  He  could 
have  sunk  into  the  cellar !— Mr.  Gammon  declared  that  he 
could  not  account  for  the  singular  conduct  of  Mr.  Titmouse 
on  the  melancholy  occasion  in  question,  except  by  referring 
it  to  the  excellent  wines  which  ne  had  too  freely  partaken  of 
at  Satin  Lodge,  added  (said  Gammon,  with  an  exquisite  ex- 
pression of  features  that  perfectly  fascinated  Tag-rag)  to  a 

certain  tender  influence  "  which  had  fairly  laid  prostrate 
the  faculties  of  the  young  and  enthusiastic  Titmouse ;  that 
there  could  be  no  doubt  of  his  real  motive  in  the  conduct 
alluded  to,  namely,  a  desire  to  test  the  sincerity  and  dis- 
interestedness of  a  "  certain  person's  "  attachment  before  he 
let  all  his  fond  and  passionate  feelings  go  out  towards  her— 
[At  this  point  the  perspiration  burst  from  every  pore  in  the 
body  of  Tag-rag]— and  that  no  one  could  deplore  the  unex- 
pected issue  of  his  little  experiment  so  much  as  now  did 
Titmouse. 

Tag-rag  really,  for  a  moment,  scarcely  knew  where  he  was, 
who  was  with  him,  nor  whether  he  stood  on  his  head  or  his 
heels,  so  delightful  and  entirely  unexpected  was  the  issue  of 
Mr.  Gammorrs  visit.  As  soon  as  his  faculties  had  somewhat 
recovered  themselves  from  their  temporary  confusion, 
almost  breathless,  he  assured  Gammon  that  no  event  in  the 
whole  course  of  his  life  had  occasioned  him  such  poignant 
regret  as  his  treatment  of  Titmouse  on  the  occasion  in  ques- 
tion ;  that  he  had  undoubtedly  followed  unwittingly  (he  was 
ashamed  to  own)  the  example  of  Titmouse,  and  drunk  far 
more  than  his  usual  quantity  of  wine  ;  besides  which  he  had 
undoubtedly  noticed,  as  had  Mrs.  T.,  the  state  of  things 
between  Mr.  Titmouse  and  his  daughter,— talking  of  whom, 
by  the  way,  he  could  assure  Mr.  Gammon  that  they  had  both 
been  ill  ever  since  that  unfortunate  evening,  and  had  never 
ceased  to  condemn  his— Tag-rag's  monstrous  conduct  on 
that  occasion.  As  for  his  daughter,  she  was  growing  thinner 
and  thinner  every  day,  and  he  thought  he  must  send  her  to 
the  country  for  a  short  time  :  in  fact— poor  girl !— she  was 
plainly  pining  away ! 

To  all  this  Mr.  Gammon  listened  with  a  calm,  delightful, 
sympathizing  look,  that  quite  transported  Tag-rag,  and 


248  TEN  THOUSAND  A-TEAB. 

satisfied  him  that  Mr.  Gammon  implicitly  believed  every 
word  that  was  being  said  to  him.  But  when  he  proceeded 
to  assure  Tag-rag  that  this  visit  of  his  had  been  undertaken 
at  the  earnest  instance  of  Mr.  Titmouse  himself,  (who,  by 
the  way,  had  removed  to  lodgings  which  would  do  for  the 
present,  so  as  they  were  only  near  to  their  office,  for  the 
purpose  of  frequent  communication  on  matters  of  business 
between  him  and  their  firm),  who  had  urged  him,  Mr.  Gam- 
mon, to  tender  the  olive  branch,  in  the  devout  hope  that  it 
might  be  accepted.  Tag-rag's  excitement  knew  scarce  any 
bounds  ;  and  he  could  almost  have  started  into  the  shop, 
and  given  orders  to  his  shopmen  to  sell  every  article,  for  the 
rest  of  the  day,  one  and  a  half  per  cent,  under  what  they  had 
been  selling  before !  Mr.  Gammon  wrote  down  Titmouse's 
direction,  and  assured  Mr.  Tag-rag  that  a  call  from  him 
would  be  gratefully  received  by  Mr.  Titmouse.  "  There's  no 
accounting  for  these  things,  Mr.  Tag-rag— is  there  ? "  said 
.Mr.  Gammon,  with  an  arch  smile,  as  he  prepared  to  depart— 
Tag-rag  squeezing  his  hands  with  painful  energy  as  Gam- 
mon bade  him  adieu,  saying  he  should  not  be  himself  for 
the  rest  of  the  daj,  and  bowing  the  aforesaid  Mr.  Gammon 
down  the  shop  with  as  profound  an  obsequiousness  as  if  he 
had  been  the  Lord  High  Chancellor,  or  even  the  Lord  Mayor. 
As  soon  as  Gammon  had  got  fairly  into  the  street,  and  to  a 
safe  distance,  he  burst  into  little  gentle  paroxysms  of 
laughter,  every  now  and  then,  that  lasted  him  till  he  had  re- 
.gained  his  office  in  Saffron  Hill. 

The  motive  so  bold  and  skilfully  suggested  by  Gammon  to 
Tag-rag,  as  that  impelling  Titmouse  to  seek  a  reconciliation 
with  him,  was  greedily  credited  by  Tag-rag.  'Tis  certainly 
very  easy  for  a  man  to  believe  what  he  wishes  to  be  true. 
Was  it  very  improbable  that  Tag-rag,  loving  only  one  object 
on  earth,  (next  to  money,  which  indeed  he  really  did  love 
with  the  best  and  holiest  energies  of  his  nature),  namely,  his 
daughter ;  and  believing  her  to  be  possessed  of  qualities  cal- 
culated to  excite  every  one's  love — should  believe  that  she 
had  inspired  Titmouse  with  the  passion  of  which  he  had  just 
been  hearing — a  passion  that  was  consuming  him,  that  could 

not  be  quenched  by  even  the  gross  outrage  which but 

faugh !  that  Tag-rag  shuddered  to  think  of.  He  clapped  his 
hat  on  his  head,  and  started  off  to  Titmouse's  lodgings,  and 
fortunately  caught  that  gentleman  just  as  he  was  going  out 
to  dine  at  a  neighboring  tavern.  If  Tag-rag  had  been  a 
keen  observer,  he  could  hardly  have  failed  to  discover 
aversion  towards  himself  written  in  every  feature  and 
gesture  of  Titmouse ;  and  also  how  difficult  it  was  to  be  con- 
cealed. But  his  eagerness  overbore  everything ;  and  took 
Titmouse  quite  by  storm.  Before  Tag-rag  had  done  with 
him,  he  had  obliterated  every  trace  of  resentment  in  his 
little  friend's  bosom.  Thoroughly  as  Gammon  thought  he 
)iad  prepared  him  for  the  encounter,  and  armed  him  at  all 


TEN  THOUSAND  A-TEAE.  249 

points— 'twas  of  no  avail.  Tag-rag  poured  such  a  monstrous 
quantity  of  flummery  down  the  gaping  mouth  and  insatiate 
throat  of  the  little  animal,  as  at  length  produced  its  desired 
effect.  Few  can  resist  flattery,  however  coarsely  ad- 
ministered; but  as  for  Titmouse,  he  felt  the  soft  fluid 
deliciously  insinuating  itself  into  every  crevice  of  his  little 
nature,  for  which  it  seemed,  indeed,  to  have  a  peculiar 
affinity ;  'twas  a  balm,  'twas  an  opiate  soothing  his  wounded 
pride,  lubricating  all  his  inner  man ;  nay,  flooding  it,  so  as  at 
length  to  extinguish  entirely  the  very  small  glimmering 
spark  of  discernment  which  nature  had  lit  in  him.  "  To  be 
forewarned,  is  to  be  f orearmed"  says  the  proverb  ;  but  it  was 
not  verified  in  the  present  instance.  Titmouse  would  have 
dined  at  Satin  Lodge  on  the  very  next  Sunday,  in  accordance 
with  the  pressing  invitations  of  Tag-rag,  but  that  he  hap- 
pened to  recollect  having  engaged  himself  to  dine  that 
evening  with  Mr.  Quirk,  at  his  residence  in  Camberwell, — 
ALIBI  HOUSE.  As  I  have  already  intimated  in  a  previous 
part  of  this  history,  that  most  respectable  old  gentleman, 
Mr.  Quirk,  with  the  shrewdness  natural  to  him,  and  which 
had  been  quickened  by  his  great  experience,  had  soon  seen 
through  the  ill-contrived  and  worse-concealed  designs  upon 
Titmouse  of  Mr.  Tag-rag;  and  justly  considered  that  the 
surest  method  of  rendering  them  abortive  would  be  to 
familiarize  Titmouse  with  a  superior  style  of  things,  such  as 
was  to  be  found  at  Alibi  House— and  a  more  lovely  and 
attractive  object  for  his  best  affections  in  Miss  Quirk — Dora 
Quirk,  the  lustre  of  whose  charms  and  accomplishments 
there  could  be  no  doubt,  he  thought,  would  instantly  efface 
the  image  of  that  poor,  feeble,  vulgar  creature,  Miss  Tag- 
rag  ;  for  such  old  Quirk  knew  her  to  be,  though,  he  had,  in 
fact,  never  for  a  moment  set  eyes  upon  her.  Mr.  Tag-rag 
looked  rather  blank  at  hearing  of  the  grand  party  there  was 
to  be  at  Alibi  House,  and  that  Titmouse  was  to  be  intro- 
duced to  the  only  daughter  of  Mr.  Quirk,  and  could  not,  for 
the  life  of  him,  abstain  from  dropping  something,  vague  and 
indistinct  to  be  sure,  about  "  entrapping  unsuspecting  in- 
nocence," and  "  interested  attentions,  and  other  similar  ex- 
pressions—all of  which,  however,  were  lost  upon  Titmouse. 
Tapping  with  an  auctioneer's  hammer  on  a  block  of  granite, 
would  make  about  as  much  impression  upon  it  as  hint, 
innuendo,  or  suggestion,  upon  a  blockhead.  So  it  was  with 
Titmouse.  He  promised  to  dine  at  Satin  Lodge  on  the  Sun- 
day after,  with  which  poor  Mr.  Tag-rag  \vas  obliged  to 
depart  content ;  having  been  unable  to  get  Titmouse  up  to 
Clapham  on  either  of  the  intervening  evenings,  on  which,  he 
told  Mr.  Tag-rag,  he  was  particularly  engaged  with  an  in- 
timate friend— in  fact,  one  of  the  solicitors ;  and  Tag-rag  left 
him,  after  shaking  him  by  the  hand  with  the  utmost 
cordiality  and  energy.  He  instantly  conceived  a  lively 
hatred  of  old  Mr.  Quirk  and  his  daughter,  who  seemed  tak- 


250  TEN  THOUSAND  A-TEAE. 

ing  so  unfair  an  advantage.  However,  what  could  be  done  ? 
Many  times  during  his  interview,  did  he  anxiously  turn 
about  in  his  mind  the  expediency  of  proffering  to  lend  or 
give  Titmouse  a  five-pound  note,  of  which  he  had  one  or  two 
in  his  pocketbook;  but  no— 'twas  k>9  much  for  human 
nature— lie  co uld not  bring  himself  to  it;  and  quitted  Tit- 
mouse as  rich  a  man  as  he  nad  entered  his  lodgings. 

The  gentleman  to  whom  Titmouse  alluded  was  in  fact  Mr. 
Snap,  who  had  early  evinced  a  great  partiality  for  him,  and 
lost  no  opportunity  of  contributing  to  his  enjoyment.  He 
was  a  sharp-sighted  person,  and  quickly  detected  many 
qualities  in  Titmouse  kindred  to  his  own.  He  sincerely 
commiserated  Titmouse's  situation,  than  which  what  could 
be  more  lonely  and  desolate?  Was  he  to  sit  night  after 
night,  in  the  lengthening  nights  of  autumn  and  winter,  with 
not  a  soul  to  speak  to,  not  a  book  to  read,  (that  was  at  least 
interesting  or  worth  reading ;)  nothing,  in  short,  to  occupy 
his  attention  ?  "  No,"  said  Snap  to  himself ; "  I  will  do  as  I 
would  be  done  by ;  I  will  come  and  draw  him  out  of  his  dull 
hole ;  I  will  show  him  life — I  will  give  him  an  early  insight 
into  the  habits  and  practices  of  the  great  world,  in  which  he 
is  so  soon  to  cut  a  leading  figure !  I  will  early  familiarize 
him  with  the  gayest  and  most  exciting  modes  of  London 
life ! "  The  very  first  taste  of  this  cup  of  pleasure,  was 
exquisitely  relished  by  Titmouse;  and  he  felt  a  proportionate 
gratitude  to  him  whose  kind  hand  had  first  raised  it  to  his 
lips.  Scenes  of  which  he  had  heretofore  only  heard  and 
read — after  which  he  had  often  sighed  and  yearned,  were 
now  opening  daily  before  him,  limited  as  were  his  means ; 
and  he  felt  perfectly  happy.  When  Snap  had  finished  the 
day's  labors  of  the  office,  from  which  he  was  generally  re- 
leased about  eight  or  nine  o'clock  in  the  evening,  he  would 
repair  to  his  lodgings,  and  decorate  himself  for  the  evening's 
display;  after  which,  either  he  would  go  to  Titmouse,  or 
Titmouse  come  to  him,  as  might  have  been  previously  agreed 
upon  between  them ;  and  then, — 

"  The  town  was  all  before  them,  where  to  choose." 

Sometimes  they  would,  arm  in  arm,  each  with  his  cigar  in 
his  mouth,  saunter  for  hours  together  along  the  leading 
streets  and  ^  thoroughfares,  making  acute  observations  ana 
deep  reflections  upon  the  ever-moving  and  motley  scenes 
around  them.  Most  frequently,  however,  they  would  repair, 
at  half-price, to  the  theatres;  for  Snap  had  the  means  of 
securing  almost  a  constant  supply  of  "  orders  "  from  the 
underlings  of  the  theatres,  also  in  respect  to  the  Sunday 
Mash,  with  which  Messrs.  Quirk  and  Gammon  were  con- 
nected, and  other  newspapers.  Ah,  'twas  a  glorious  sight 
to  see  these  two  gentlemen  saunter  into  a  vacant  box,  con- 
scious that  the  eyes  of  two-thirds  of  the  house  were  fixed 


TEN  THOUSAND  A-YEAR.  251 

upon  them  in  admiration,  and  conducting  themselves 
accordingly— as  swells  of  the  first  water !  One  such  night 
counterbalanced,  in  Titmouse's  estimation,  a  whole  year  of 
previous  obscurity  and  wretchedness !  The  theatre  over, 
they  would  repair  to  some  cloudy  tavern,  full  of 
noise  and  smoke,  and  the  glare  of  gas-light — redolent  of 
the  fragrant  fumes  of  tobacco,  spirits,  and  porter,  inter- 
mingled with  the  tempting  odors  of  smoking  kidneys,  mut- 
ton-chops, beefsteaks,  oysters,  stewed  cheese,  toasted  cheese, 
Welsh  rabbits ;  where  those  who  are  chained  to  the  desk  and 
the  counter  during  the  day,  reval  in  the  license  of  the  hour,  and 
eat,  and  drink,  and  smoke  to  the  highest  point  either  of  ex- 
citement or  stupefaction,  and  enter  into  all  the  slang  of  the 
day — of  the  turf,  the  ring,  the  cockpit,  the  theatres,  and 
shake  their  sides  at  comic  songs.  To  enter  one  of  these 
places  when  the  theatre  was  over,  was  a  luxury  indeed  to 
Titmouse  ;  figged  out  in  his  very  uttermost  best,  with  satin 
stock  and  double  breastpins ;  his  glossy  hat  cocked  on 
one  side  of  his  head,  his  tight  blue  surtout,  with  the  snowy 
handkerchief  elegantly  drooping  out  of  the  breast  pocket ; 
straw-colored  kid  gloves,  tight  trousers,  and  shining  boots ; 
his  ebony  silver-headed  cane  held  carelessly  under  his  arm ; 
to  walk  into  the  middle  of  the  room  with  a  sort  of  haughty 
ease  and  indifference,  or  nonchalance ;  and  after  deliberately 
scanning,  through  his  eyeglass,  every  box,  with  its  occu- 
pants, at  length  drop  into  a  vacant  nook,  and  with  a  languid 
air  summon  the  bustling  waiter  to  receive  his  commands. 
The  circumstances  of  his  almost  always  accompanying  Snap 
on  these  occasions,  who  was  held  in  great  awe  by  the  wait- 
ers, to  whom  his  professional  celebrity  was  well  known  (for 
there  was  scarce  an  interesting,  a  dreadful,  or  a  nasty  scene 
at  any  of  the  police-offices  in  which  Snap's  name  did  not 
figure  in  the  newspapers  as  "  on  behalf  of  the  prisoner,"  (got 
Titmouse  almost  an  equal  share  of  consideration,  and  aided 
the  effect  produced  by  his  own  commanding  appearance.  As 
for  Snap,  whenever  he  was  asked  who  his  companion  was, 
he  would  whisper  in  a  very  significant  tone  and  manner,— 
"  Devilish  high  chap !"  From  these  places  they  would  re- 
pair, not  ^infrequently,  to  certain  other  scenes  of  nightly 
London  life,  which,  I  thank  God !  the  virtuous  reader  can 
form  no  notion  of,  though  they  are,  strange  to  say,  winked 
at,  if  not  patronized  by  the  police  and  magistracy,  till  the 
metropolis  is  choked  with  them.  Thus  would  Snap  and  Tit- 
mouse pleasantly  pass  away  their  time  till  one,  two,  three, 
and  often  four  o'clock  in  the  morning  ;  at  which  hours,  they 
would,  with  many  yawns,  skulk  homewards  through  the  de- 
serted and  silent  streets,  their  clothes  redolent  of  tobacco 
smoke,  their  stomachs  overcharged,  their  heads  often  mud- 
dled, swimming,  and  throbbing  with  their  multifarious  po- 
tations—having thus  spent  a  "jolly  night,"  and  "  seen  life." 
'Twas  thus  that  Snap  greatly  endeared  himself  to  Titmouse, 


252  TEN  THOUSAND  A-TEAE. 

and  secretly  (for  he  enjoined  upon  Titmouse,  as  the  condition 
of  their  continuance,  strict  secrecy  on  the  subject  of  these 
nocturnal  adventures)  stole  a  march  upon  his  older  competi- 
tors for  the  good  opinion  of  Titmouse— Messrs.  Quirk,  Tag- 
rag,  and  even  the  astute  and  experienced  Gammon  himself. 
Such  doings  as  these  required,  however,  as  may  easily  be 
believed,  some  slight  augmentations  of  the  allowance  made 
{to  Titmouse  by  Messrs.  Quirk  and  Gammon ;  and  'twas  fort- 
'unate  that  Snap  was  in  a  condition,  having  a  few  hundreds 
at  his  command,  to  supply  the  necessities  of  Titmouse, 
receiving  with  a  careless  air,  on  the  occasion  of  such  ad- 
vances, small  slips  of  paper  by  way  of  acknowledgments ; 
some  on  stamped  paper,  others  on  unstamped  paper— prom- 
issory notes  and  I.  O.  TJ.'s.  Inasmuch,  however,  as  Snap 
was  not  always  possessed  of  a  stamp  on  the  occasion  of  a 
sudden  advance,  and  having  asked  the  opinion  of  his  pleader 
(a  sharp  fellow  who  had  been  articled  at  the  same  time  as 
himself  to  Messrs.  Quirk  and  Gammon)  as  to  whether  an  in- 
strument in  this  form— 

"  I.  O.  U.  so  much— with  interest"  would  be  available  with- 
out a  stamp,  and  being  informed  that  it  was  a  very  doubtful 
.point,  Snap  ingeniously  met  the  difficulty  by  quietly  adding 
to  the  principal  what  might  become  due  in  respect  of  inter- 
est :  e.  g.  if  £5  were  lent,  the  acknowledgment  would  stand 
for  £15— these  little  slips  of  paper  being  generally  signed  by 
Titmouse  in  moments  of  extreme  exhilaration,  when  he 
.never  thought  of  scrutinizing  anything  that  his  friend  Snap 
would  lay  before  him.  For  the  honor  of  Snap,  I  must  say 
.that  I  hardly  think  he  deliberately  purposed  to  perpetrate 
the  fraud  which  such  a  transaction  appears  to  amount  to ; 
all  he  wanted  was— so  he  satisfied  himself  at  least — to  have 
it  in  his  power  to  recover  the  full  amount  of  principal  really 
advanced,  with  interest,  on  one  or  other  of  those  various 
securities,  and  hold  the  surplus  as  trustee  for  Titmouse.  If, 
for  instance,  any  unfortunate  difference  should  hereafter 
arise  between  himself  and  Titmouse,  and  he  should  refuse 
to  recognize  his  pecuniary  obligations  to  Snap,  the  latter 

gentleman  would  be  provided  with  short  and  easy  proofs  of 
is  demands  against  him.    'Twas  thus,  I  say,  that  Snap 
rendered  himself  indispensable  to  Titmouse,  whom  he  bound 
to  him  by  every  tie  of  gratitude ;  so  that,  in  short,  they  be- 
came sworn  friends. 

I  will  always  say  for  Gammon,  that  he  strenuously  en- 
deavored, from  whatever  motive,  to  urge  upon  Titmouse 
the  necessity  of  his  acquiring,  at  all  events,  a  smattering  of 
the  elements  of  useful  education.  Beyond  an  acquaintance 
with  the  petty  operations  of  arithmetic  requisite  for  coun- 
ter-transactions, I  will  venture  to  say  that  poor  Titmouse 
had  no  serviceable  knowledge  of  any  kind.  Mr.  Gammon 
repeatedly  pressed  him  to  put  himself  under  competent 
teachers  of  the  ordinary  branches  of  education;  but  Tit* 


TEN  THOUSAND  A-YEAB.  253 

mouse  as  often  evaded  him,  and  at  length  flatly  refused  to 
do  anything  of  the  kind.  He  promised,  however,  to  read 
such  books  as  Mr.  Gammon  might  recommend,  who  there- 
upon sent  him  several ;  but  a  book  before  Titmouse  was 
much  the  same  as  a  plate  of  saw-dust  before  a  hungry  man. 
Mr.  Gammon,  himself  a  man  of  considerable  acquirements 
soon  saw  the  true  state  of  the  case,  and  gave  up  his  attempts 
in  despair  and  disgust.  Not  that  he  ever  suffered  Titmouse 
to  perceive  the  faintest  indications  of  such  feelings  towards 
him ;  on  the  contrary,  Gammon  ever  manifested  the  same 
bland  and  benignant  demeanor,  consulting  his  wishes  in 
everything,  and  striving  to  instil  into  him  feelings  of  love, 
tempered  by  respect,  as  towards  the  most  powerful— the 
only  real,  disinterested  friend  he  had  ;  and  to  a  very  great 
extent  he  succeeded. 

Titmouse  spent  several  hours  in  preparing  for  an  effective 
first  appearance  at  the  dinner-table  at  Alibi  House-  Since 
dining  at  Satin  Lodge,  he  had  considerably  increased  his 
wardrobe  both  in  quantity  and  style.  He  now  sported  a  pair 
of  tight  black  trousers,  with  pumps  and  gossamer  silk  stock- 
ings. He  wore  a  crimson  velvet  waistcoat,  with  a  bright 
blue  satin  under-waistcoat,  a  shirt-frill  standing  out  some- 
what fiercely  at  right  angles  with  his  breast,  and  a  brown 
dress-coat  cut  in  the  extreme  of  the  fashion,  the  long  tails 
coming  to  a  point  just  about  the  backs  of  the  knees.  His 
hair  (its  purple  hue  still  pretty  distinctly  perceptible)  was 
disposed  with  great  elegance.  He  had  discarded  mustaches ; 
but  had  a  very  promising  imperial.  The  hair  underneath 
his  chin  came  out  curling  on  each  side  of  it,  above  his  stock, 
like  two  little  tufts  or  horns.  Over  his  waistcoat  he  wore 
his  mosaic-gold  watch-guard,  and  a  broad  black  watered  rib- 
bon, to  which  was  attached  his  eye-glass—in  fact,  if  he  had 
dressed  himself  in  order  to  sit  to  a  miniature  painter  for  his 
likeness,  he  could  not  have  taken  greater  pains,  or  secured 
a  more  successful  result.  The  only  points  about  his  appear- 
ance with  which  he  was  at  all  dissatisfied,  were  his  hair— 
which  was  not  yet  the  thing  which  he  hoped  in  due  time  to 
see  it — his  thicK  red  stumpy  hands,  and  his  round  shoulders. 
The  last  matter  gave  him  considerable  concern,  for  he  felt 
that  it  seriously  interfered  with  a  graceful  carriage;  and 
that  the  defect  in  his  figure  had  been,  after  all,  not  in  the 
least  remedied  by  the  prodigious  padding  of  his  coat.  His 
protuberant  eyes,  of  very  light  hue,  had  an  expression  that 
entirely  harmonized  with  that  of  his  open  mouth ;  and  both 
together — quite  independently  of  his  dress,  carriage,  and  de- 
meanor—(there  is  nothing  like  being  candid)— gave  you  the 
image  of  a— complete  fool.  Having  at  length  carefully  ad- 
justed his  hat  on  his  head,  and  drawn  on  his  white  kid 
gloves,  he  enveloped  himself  in  a  stylish  cloak,  with  long 
lack  silk  tassels,  which  had  been  lent  to  him  by  Snap ;  and 
about  four  o'clock,  forth  sallied  Mr.  Titmouse,  carefully 


254  TEN  THOUSAND  A-YEAR. 

picking  his  way,  in  quest  of  the  first  coach  that  could  con- 
vey him  to  Alibi  House,  or  as  near  to  it  as  might  be.  He 
soon  found  one,  and,  conscious  that  his  appearance  was  far 
too  splendid  for  an  outside  place,  got  inside.  All  the  way 
along,  his  heart  was  in  a  little  nutter  of  vanity,  excitement, 
and  expectation.  He  was  going  to  be  introduced  to  Miss 
Quirk— and  probably,  also,  to  several  people  of  great  conse- 
quence—as the  heir-apparent  to  .£10,000  a  year !  Two  very 
respectable  female  passengers,  his  companions  all  the  way, 
he  never  once  deigned  to  interchange  a  syllable  with.  Four 
or  five  times  did  he  put  his  head  out  of  the  window,  calling 
out,  in  a  loud  peremptory  tone—"  Mind,  coachman — Alibi 
House — Mr.  Quirk's— Alibi  House— Do  you  hear,  demme?" 
After  which  he  would  sink  back  into  the  seat  with  a  magnifi- 
cent air,  as  if  he  had  not  been  used  to  give  himself  so  much 
trouble.  The  coach  at  length  stopped.  "Halibi  'Ouse,  sir," 
said  the  coachman,  in  a  most  respectful  tone — "  this  is  Mr. 
Quirk's,  sir."  Titmouse  stepped  out,  dropped  eighteenpence 
into  the  man's  hand,  and  opening  the  gate,  found  himself  in 
a  straight  and  narrow  gravel  walk,  of  about  twenty  yards  in 
length,  with  little  obstinate-looking  stunted  shrubs  on  each 
side.  Twas  generally  known  among  Mr.  Quirk's  friends  by 
the  name  of  the  Rope-walk.  Titmouse  might  have  entered 
before  as  fine-looking  a  house,  but  only  to  deliver  a  bundle 
of  drapery  or  hosiery ;  never  before  had  he  entered  such  a 
one  as  a  guest.  It  was,  in  fact,  a  fair-sized  house,  at  least 
treble  that  of  Satin  Lodge,  and  had  a  far  more  stylish  ap- 
pearance. When  Titmouse  pulled  the  bell,  the  door  was 
quickly  plucked  open  by  a  big  footman,  with  showy  shoulder- 
Knot  and  a  pair  of  splendid  red  plush  breeches,  who  soon 
disposed  of  Titmouse's  cloak  and  hat,  and  led  the  way  to  the 
drawing-room,  before  our  friend,  with  a  sudden  palpitation 
of  the  heart,  had  had  a  moment's  time  even  to  run  his  hands 
through  his  hair. 

"  Your  name,  sir  ?  "  inquired  the  man,  suddenly  pausing — 
with  his  hand  upon  the  handle  of  the  door. 

"Mr.  Titmouse." 

"  I— beg  your  pardon,  sir ;  what  name  ?  " 

Titmouse,  clearing  his  throat,  repeated  his  name — open 
went  the  door,  and—"  Mr.  Ticklemouse,"  said  the  servant 
very  loudly  and  distinctly — ushering  in  Titmouse ;  on  whom 
the  door  was  the  next  instant  closed.  He  felt  amazingly 
flustered— and  he  would  have  been  still  more  so,  if  he  could 
have  been  made  aware  of  the  titter  which  pervaded  the  four- 
teen or  twenty  people  assembled  in  the  room,  occasioned  by 
the  droll  misnomer  of  the  servant,  and  the  exquisitely  ridic- 
ulous appearance  of  poor  Titmouse.  Mr.  Quirk,  dressed  in 
black,  with  knee  breeches  and  silk  stockings,  immediately 
bustled  up  to  him,  shook  him  cordially  by  the  hand,  and  led 
him  up  to  the  assembled  guests.  "  My  daughter— Miss  Quirk ; 
Mrs,  Alderman  Addlehead;  Mrs.  Deputy  Diddledaddle ; 


TEN  THOUSAND  A-TEAE.  255 

Mrs-  Alias,  my  sister;— Mr.  Alderman  Addlehead ;  Mr. 
Deputy  Diddle-daddle ;  Mr.  Bluster  ;  Mr.  Slang ;  Mr.  Hug ; 
Mr.  Flaw;  Mr.  Viper;  Mr.  Ghastly;  Mr.  Gammon  you 
know."  Miss  Quirk  was  about  four  or  five-and-twenty— a 
fat  young  lady,  with  flaxen  hair  curled  formally  all  over  her 
head  and  down  to  her  shoulders,  so  that  she  very  much  re- 
sembled one  of  those  great  wax  dolls  seen  in  bazaars  and 
shop  windows,  especially  if  looked  at  though  a  strong  mag- 
nifying glass.  Her  complexion  was  beautifully  fair;  her 
eyes  small ;  her  face  quite  round  and  fat.  From  the  dieaway 
manner  in  which  she  moved  her  head,  and  the  languid  tone 
of  her  voice,  it  was  obvious  that  she  was  a  very  sentimental 
young  lady.  She  was  dressed  in  white,  and  wore  a  massive 
gold  chain— her  fat  arms  being  half  covered  with  long  kid 
gloves.  She  was  sitting  on  the  sofa,  from  which  she  did  not 
rise  when  Titmouse  was  introduced  to  her— and  the  moment 
after  hid  her  face  behind  the  album  which  had  been  lying  on 
her  knee,  and  which  she  had  been  showing  to  the  ladies  on 
each  side  of  her ;  for,  in  fact,  neither  she  nor  any  one  else 
could,  without  the  greatest  difficulty,  refrain  from  laughing 
at  the  monkeyfied  appearance  of  Titmouse.  The  Alderman 
was  a  stout,  stupid,  little  man— a  fussy  old  prig— with  small 
angry-looking  black  eyes,  and  a  short  red  nose :  as  for  his 
head,  it  seemed  as  though  he  had  just  smeared  some  sticky 
fluid  over  it,  and  then  dipped  it  into  a  flour  tub,  so  thickly 
laden  was  it  with  powder.  Mr.  Deputy  Diddle-daddle  was 
tall  and  thin,  and  serious  and  slow  of  speech,  with  the 
solemn  composure  of  an  undertaker.  Mr.  Bluster  was  a 
great  Old  Bailey  barrister,  about  fifty  years  old,  the  leader 
constantly  employed  by  Messrs.  Quirk,  Gammon,  and  Snap  ; 
and  was  making  at  least  a  thousand  a-year.  He  had  an  amaz- 
ingly truculent-looking  countenance,  coarse  to  a  degree,  and 
his  voice  matched  it ;  but  on  occasions  like  the  present— £.  e. 
in  elegant  society— he  would  fain  drop  the  successful  terrors 
of  his  manner,  and  appear  the  mild,  dignified  gentleman.  He 
therefore  spoke  in  a  very  soft,  cringing  way,  with  an  anxious 
smile ;  but  his  bold  insolent  eye  and  coarse  mouth -~\F*  vfc 
could  disguise  or  mitigate  their  expression  ?  Here  lie  wug, 
playing  the  great  man ;  making  himself,  however,  most  partic- 
ularly agreeable  to  Messrs.  Quirk  and  Gammon.  Slang  w«  6 
of  the  same  school ;  fat,  vulgar,  confident,  and  empty ;  tellmg 
obscene  jokes  and  stories,  in  a  deep  bass  voice.  He  sang  a 
good  song,  too — particularly  of  that  glass  which  required  the 
absence  of  ladies— and  of  gentlemen.  Hug  (Mr.  Toady  Hug) 
was  also  a  barrister;  a  glib  little  Jewish-looking  fellow, 
creeping  into  considerable  criminal  practice.  He  was  a 
sneaking  backbiter,  and  had  a  blood-hound  scent  after  an 
attorney.  See  him,  for  instance,  at  this  moment,  in  close 
and  eager  conversation  with  Mr.  Flaw,  who,  rely  npon  it, 
"will  give  him  a  brief  before  the  week  is  over.  Viper  was  the 
editor  of  the  Sunday  Flash ;  a  cold,  venomous,  Htle  fellow, 


256  TEN  THOUSAND  A-YEAE. 

He  was  of  opinion  that  everything  was  wrong— moral,  physi. 
cal,  intellectual,  and  social ;  that  there  was  really  no  such 
thing,  or  at  least  ought  not  to  be,  as  religion  ;  and,  as  to  polit- 
ical rights,  that  everybody  ought  to  be  uppermost  at  once. 
He  had  failed  in  business  twice,  and  disreputably  ;  then  had 
become  an  Unitarian  parson ;  but,  having  seduced  a  young 
female  member  of  his  congregation,  he  was  expelled  from 
his  pulpit.  An  action  being  brought  against  him  by  the' 
mother  of  his  victim,  and  heavy  damages  obtained,  he  at- 
tempted to  take  the  benefit  of  the  Insolvent  Debtors'  Act — 

but,  on  account  of  Miss ,  was  remanded  for  eighteen 

months.  That  period  he  employed  in  writing  a  shockingly 
blasphemous  work,  for  which  he  was  prosecuted,  and  sen- 
tenced to  a  heavy  fine  and  imprisonment ;  on  being  released 
from  which,  saturated  with  gall  and  bitterness  against  all 
mankind,  he  took  to  political  writing  of  a  very  violent  char- 
acter, and  was  at  length  picked  up,  half  starved,  by  his  pres- 
ent patron,  Mr.  Quirk,  and  made  editor  of  the  Sunday 
Flash.  Is  not  all  this  history  written  in  his  sallow,  sinister- 
eyed,  bitter-expressioned  countenance?  Woe  to  him  who 
gets  into  a  discussion  with  Viper !  There  were  one  or  two 
others  present,  particularly  a  Mr.  Ghastly,  a  third-rate  tragic 
actor,  with  a  tremendous  mouth,  only  one  eye,  and  a  very 
hungry  look.  He  never  spoke,  because  no  one  spoke  to  him, 
for  his  clothes  seemed  rather  rusty-black.  The  only  man  of 
gentlemanlike  appearance  in  the  room  was  Mr.  Gammon; 
and  he  took  an  early  opportunity  of  engaging  poor  Titmouse 
in  conversation,  and  setting  him  comparatively  at  his  ease— 
a  thing  which  was  attempted  by  old  Quirk,  but  in  such  a 
fidgety-fussy  way  as  served  only  to  fluster  Titmouse  the  more. 
Mr.  Quirk  gave  a  dinner  party  of  this  sort  regularly  every 
Sunday ;  and  they  formed  the  happiest  moments  of  his  life — 
occasions  on  which  he  banished  from  his  thoughts  the  re- 
sponsible anxieties  of  his  profession,  and,  surrounded  by  a 
select  circle  of  choice  spirits,  such  as  were  thus  collected 
together,  partook  joyously  of  the 

u  Feast  of  reason,  and  the  flow  of  soul." 

"  This  is  a  very  beautiful  picture,  Titmouse,  isn't  it  ? " 
said  Gammon,  leading  him  to  the  further  corner  of  the  draw- 
ing-room, where  hung  a  small  picture  with  a  sort  of  curtain 
of  black  gauze  before  it,  which  Gammon  lifting  up,  Titmouse 
beheld  a  picture  of  a  man  suspended  from  the  gallows,  his 
hands  tied  with  cords  before  him,  his  head  forced  aside,  and 
covered  down  to  the  chin  with  a  white  nightcap.  'Twas 
done  with  sickening  fidelity,  and  Titmouse  gazed  at  it  with 
a  shudder.  "  Charming  thing,  isn't  it  ?  "  said  Gammon  with 
a  very  expressive  smile. 

"  Y— e— e— s,"  replied  Titmouse,  his  eyes  glued  to  the  hor- 
rid object. 

"Very  striking,  a'n't  it?"  quoth  Quirk,  bustling  up  tQ 


TEN  THOUSAND  A-YEAR.  257 

them ;  "  'twas  painted  for  me  by  a  first-rate  artist,  whose 
brother  I  very  nearly  saved  from  the  gallows !  Like  such 
things  ?  "  he  inquired  with  a  matter-of-fact  air,  drawing  down 
the  black  gauze. 

"  Yes,  sir,  uncommon — most  uncommon." 

"  Well,  I'll  show  you  something  very  interesting  !  Heard 
of  Gilderoy,  that  was  hanged  last  year  for  forgery  ?  Gad, 
my  daughter's  got  a  brooch  with  a  lock  of  his  hair  in  it,  which 
he  gave  me  himself — a  client  of  mine  :  within  an  ace  of  get- 
ting him  off — flaw  in  the  indictment— found  it  out  myself — 
did,  by  gad !  Come  along,  and  I'll  get  Dora  to  show  it  to 
you !  "  and,  putting  Titmouse's  arm  m  his,  he  led  him  up  to 
the  interesting  young  lady. 

"  Dora,  just  show  my  friend  Titmouse  that  brooch  of  yours, 
with  Gilderoy's  hair." 

"  Oh,  my  dear  papa,  'tis  such  a  melancholy  thing !  "  said 
she,  at  the  same  time  detaching  it  from  her  dress,  and  hand- 
ing it  to  her  papa,  who,  holding  it  in  his  hands,  gave  Tit- 
mouse, and  one  or  two  others  who  stood  beside,  a  very  in- 
teresting account  of  the  last  hours  of  the  deceased  Gilderoy. 

"He  was  very  handsome,  papa,  wasn't  he ? "  inquired  Miss 
Quirk  with  a  sigh,  and  a  very  pensive  air. 

"  Wasn't  bad-looking  ;  but  good  looks  and  the  condemned 
cell  don't  long  agree  together." 

"Ah,  papa!  "  exclaiming  Miss  Quirk  in  a  mournful  tone, 
and,  leaning  back  in  the  sofa,  raised  her  handkerchief  to  her 
eyes. 

"  You  are  too  sensitive,  my  love !  "  whispered  her  aunt, 
Mrs.  Alias,  squeezing  the  hand  of  her  niece,  who,  struggling 
against  her  feelings,  presently  revived. 

"  We  were  looking  just  now,"  said  Mr.  Hug,  addressing 
Mr.  Quirk,  "  at  a  very  interesting  addition  to  Miss  Quirk's 
album— that  letter  of  Grizzlegut. 

"  Ah,  very  striking !  Value  it  beyond  everything  !  Shall 
never  forget  Grizzlegut!  Very  nearly  got  off!  Twas  an 
'etc.'  that  nearly  saved  his  life,  through  being  omitted  in  the 
indictment.  Fore  gad,  we  thought  we'd  got  'em  ! " 

They  were  alluding  to  an  autograph  letter  which  had  been 
addressed  to  Mr.  Quirk  by  Grizzlegut,  (who  had  been  exe- 
cuted for  high  treason  a  few  weeks  before,)  the  night  before 
he  suffered.  He  was  a  blood-stained  scoundrel  of  the  deep- 
est dye,  and  ought  to  have  been  hanged  and  quartered  half- 
a-dozen  times. 

"  Will  you  read  it  aloud,  Mr.  Hug  ?  "  inquired  Miss  Quirk ; 
and  the  barrister,  in  a  somewhat  pompous  tone,  read  the  fol- 
lowing memorable  document  :— 

"  Condemned  Cell,  Newgate, 
"  Friday  night,  half-past  11  o'clock, 
"  SIR,  "  1st  May,  18— 

"  At  this  awful  moment,  when  this  world  is  closing  rapid- 
ly upon  me  and  my  fellow-sufferers,  and  the  sound  of  the 


258  TEN  THOUSAND  A-YEAP. 

wretches  putting  up  the  Grim  Gallows  are  audible  to  my 
listening  ears,  and  on  the  morrow  the  most  horrible  death 
that  malicious  tyrants  can  inflict  awaits  me,  my  soul  being 
calm  and  full  of  fortitude,  and  beating  responsive  to  the  call 
of  GLORIOUS  LIBERTY,  I  feel  prouder  than  the  King  upon  his 
throne.  I  feel  that  I  have  done  much  to  secure  the  liberties 
of  my  injured  country. 

For  liberty,  glorious  Liberty, 
Who'd  fear  to  die  ?  ' 

Many  thanks  to  you,  sir,  for  your  truly  indefatigable  efforts 
on  my  behalf,  and  the  constant  exercise  of  a  skill  that  nearly 
secured  us  a  Glorious  Acquittal.  What  a  Flame  we  would 
have  raised  in  England !  That  should  have  blasted  the  ene- 
mies of  True  Freedom.  I  go  to  Hereafter,  (if,  indeed,  there 
be  a  hereafter,)  as  we  shall  soon  know,  not  with  my  soul 
crammed  with  Priestcraft,  but  a  Bold  Briton,  having  laid 
down  my  life  for  my  country,  knowing  that  Future  Ages 
will  do  me  Justice. 

"  Adieu,  Tyrants,  adieu !  Do  your  worst ! !  My  soul  de- 
fies you ! ! ! 

"  I  am.  Sir, 

"  Your  humble,  obliged,  and 
"  undismayed  servant, 

"  ARTHUR  GRIZZLEGTJT. 
"  To  CALEB  QTIIKK,  ESQ. 

"  Tyrants  grim 

Will  on  the  morrow  cut  me  limb  from  limb, 
While  Liberty  looks  on  with  terrible  eye, 
And  says,/  will  avenge  Mm  by-and-by. 

"ARTHUR  GRIZZLEGUT." 

The  reading  of  the  above  produced  a  great  sensation. 
"  That  man's  name  will  be  enrolled  among  the  Sidneys  and 
the  Hampdens  of  his  country !  "  said  Viper,  with  a  grim  and 
excited  air.  "  That  letter  deserves  to  be  carved  on  a  golden 
tablet !  The  last  four  lines  are  sublime !  He  was  a  martyr 
to  principles  that  are  silently  and  rapidly  making  their  way 
in  this  country." — How  much  further  he  would  have  gone  on 
in  this  strain,  seeing  no  one  present  had  resolution  enough 
to  differ  with  or  interrupt  him,  even  if  they  had  been  so  dis- 
posed, I  know  not ;  but  fortunately  dinner  was  announced — 
a  sound  which  startled  old  Quirk  out  of  a  posture  of  intense 
attention  to  Viper,  and  evident  admiration  of  his  sentiments. 
He  gave  his  arm  with  an  air  of  prodigious  politeness  to  the 
gaunt  Mrs.  Alderman  Addlehead,  whose  distinguished  lord 
led  down  Mrs.  Quirk— and  the  rest  followed  in  no  particular 
order— Titmouse  arm  in  arm  with  Gammon,  who  took  care 
to  place  him  next  to  himself,  (Gammon.)  It  was  really  a 
dashing  sort  of  dinner.  Quirk  had,  indeed,  long  been  cele« 


TEN  THOUSAND  A-YEAR.  259 

brated  for  his  Sunday  dinners.  Titmouse  had  never  seen 
anything  like  it ;  and  was  quite  bewildered — particularly  at 
the  number  of  different  shaped  and  colored  glasses,  etc.  etc. 
etc.,  placed  opposite  to  him.  He  kept  a  constant  eye  on  the 
movements  of  Gammon,  and  did  whatever  he  did,  as  if  the 
two  had  been  moved  by  the  same  set  of  springs,  and  was 
thus  saved  innumerable  embarrassments  and  annoyances. 
What  chiefly  struck  his  attention  was  a  prodigious  number 
of  dishes,  great  and  small,  as  if  half-a-dozen  dinners  had  been 
crowded  into  one  ;  the  rapidity  with  which  they  were  chang- 
ed, and  plates  removed,  in  constant  succession  ;  the  incessant 
invitations  to  take. wine  that  were  flying  about  during  the 
whole  of  dinner.  For  a  considerable  while  Titmouse  was 
too  much  flurried  to  enjoy  himself ;  but  a  few  glasses  of 
champagne  succeeded  in  elevating  his  spirits  to  the  proper 
pitch — and  would  soon  have  driven  them  far  beyond  it.  Al- 
most everybody,  except  the  great  folk  at  the  top  of  the  table, 
asked  him  to  take  wine  ;  and  he  constantly  filled  his  glass. 
In  fact  Gammon,  recollecting  a  scene  at  his  own  chamber, 
soon  perceived  that,  unless  he  interfered,  Titmouse  would 
be  drunk  long  before  dinner  was  over.  He  had  not  imagin- 
ed the  earth  to  contain  so  exquisite  a  drink  as  champagne  ; 
and  he  would  have  fallen  down  and  worshipped  it,  as  it  came 
fizzing  and  flashing  out  of  the  bottle-  Gammon  earnestly  as- 
sured him  that  he  would  be  ill  if  he  drunk  so  much— that 
many  eyes  were  upon  him— and  that  it  was  not  the  custom 
to  do  more  than  merely  sip  from  his  wine-glass  when  chal- 
lenging or  challenged.  But  Titmouse  had  taken  a  consider- 
ably greater  quantity  on  board,  before  Gammon  thus  inter- 
fered, than  that  gentleman  was  aware  of,  and  began  to  get 
very  voluble.  Guess  the  progress  he  had  made,  when  he 
called  out  with  a  confident  air — "  Mr.  Alderman !  Your 
health !  "—whether  more  to  that  great  man's  astonishment  or 
disgust  I  cannot  undertake  to  say :  but  after  a  steady  stare 
for  a  moment  or  two  at  Titmouse,  "  Oh !  I  shall  be  very  hap- 
py, indeed,  Mr.  Gammon,"  he  called  out,  looking  at  the  lat- 
ter gentleman,  and  drinking  with  him.  That  signified  noth- 
ing, however,  to  Titmouse,  who,  indeed,  did  not  see  anything 
at  all  pointed  or  unusual,  and  gulped  down  his  wine  as  eager- 
ly as  before. 

"  Cool  puppy,  that,  Miss  Quirk,  must  say,"  snuffled  the  of- 
fended Alderman  to  Miss  Quirk. 

"  He's  young,  dear  Mr.  Alderman,"  said  she,  sweetly  and 
mildly — "  and  when  you  consider  the  immense  fortune  he  is 
coming  into— ten  thousand  a-year,  my  papa  says — 

"  That  don't  make  him  less  a  puppy — nor  a  brute,"  inter- 
rupted the  ruffled  Alderman,  still  more  indignant ;  for  his 
own  forty  thousand  pounds,  the  source  of  all  his  social  em- 
inence, suuk  into  insignificance  at  the  sound  of  the  splendid 
income  just  about  to  drop  into  the  lap  of  Titmouse.  Mr. 
Bluster,  who  headed  the  table  on  Miss  Quirk's  left-hand  side, 


260  TEN  THOUSAND  A-YEAE. 

and  who  felt  that  he  ought  to  be,  but  knew  that  in  the  pres- 
ence  of  the  Alderman  he  icas  not,  the  great  man  of  the  day, 
observing  the  irritation  under  which  his  rival  was  suffering, 
immediately  raised  his  threatening  double-glasses  to  his  eyes, 
and  in  a  tone  of  ostentatious  condescension,  looking  down  the 
table  to  Titmouse,  called  out,  "  Mr.  Titmash—  may  I  have  the 
honor  of  drinking  wine  with  you  ?  " 

"  Ya— as,  brother  Bumptious,"  replied  Titmouse,  who  could 
never  bear  his  name  mispronounced,  and  he  raised  his  glass 
to  his  eye ;  "  was  just  going  to  ask  you  !  "  All  this  was  done 
in  such  a  loud  and  impudent  tone  and  manner,  as  made  Gam- 
mon still  more  uneasy  for  his  young  companion.  But  his 
sally  had  been  received  by  the  company  as  a  very  smart  re- 
tort, and  produced  a  roar  of  laughter,  every  one  being  glad 
to  see  Mr.  Bluster  snubbed,  who  bore  it  in  silent  dignity, 
though  his  face  showed  his  chagrin  and  astonishment ;  and 
he  very  heartily  agreed,  for  once  in  his  life,  with  the  worship- 
ful person  opposite  to  him  in  his  estimate  of  our  friend  Tit- 
mouse. "  Mr.  Titmouse !  Mr.  Titmouse !  my  daughter  won- 
ders you  won't  take  wine  with  her,"  said  Mr.  Quirk  in  a  low 
tone—"  will  you  join  us  ?  we're  going  to  take  a  glass  of  cham- 
pagne." 

"  Oh  !  'pon  my  life— delighted  "—quoth  Titmouse. 

"  Dora,  my  dear !  Mr.  Titmouse  will  take  wine  with  you ! 
-Jack,"  (to  the  servant,)  "  fill  Miss  Quirk's  and  Mr.  Tit- 
mouse's glasses  to  the  brim." 

"  Oh  no !  dearest  papa." 

"  Pho !  pho !— nonsense— the  first  time  of  asking,  you  know, 
ah,  ha!" 

"  Well !  If  it  must  be,"  and  with  what  a  graceful  inclination 
—with  what  a  sly  searching  glance,  and  fascinating  smile,  did 
she  exchange  courtesies  with  Titmouse !  He  felt  disposed  to 
take  wine  with  her  a  second  time  immediately  ;  but  Gammon 
restrained  him.  Mr.  Toady  Hug,  having  become  acquainted 
with  the  brilliant  prospects  of  Titmouse,  earnestly  desired  to 
exert  his  little  talents  to  do  the  agreeable,  and  ingratiate  him- 
self with  Mr.  Titmouse ;  but  there  was  a  counteracting  force 
in  another  direction,  the  attorney,  Mr. Flaw,  who  had  the 
greatest  practice  at  the  Clerkenwell  sessions,  sat  beside  him, 
and  received  his  most  respectful  and  incessant  attentions  ; 
Hug  speaking  over  to  him  in  a  low  confidential  whisper,  con- 
stantly casting  a  furtive  glance  towards  Bluster  and  Slang, 
to  see  whether  they  were  observing  him.  In  "strict  confi- 
dence "  he  assured  Mr.  Flaw  how  his  case,  the  other  day, 
might  have  been  won,  if  such  and  such  a  course  had  been 
adopted, "  which  would  have  been  the  line  he  "  (Hug)  "  would 
have  taken : "  and  which  he  explained  with  anxious  energy. 
"  I  must  say,  Flip  regularly  threw  the  case  away— no  doubt 
of  it !  By  the  way,  what  became  of  that  burglary  case  of 
yours,  on  Friday  ?  " 

"  Found  guilty,  poor  fellows ! " 


TEN  THOUSAND  A-YEAE.  261 

"You  don't  say  so?" 

'•  Fact,  by  Jove,  though ! " 

"How  could  Gobble  nave  lost  that  verdict?  I  assure  you 
I  would  have  bet  ten  to  one  on  your  getting  a  verdict ;  for  I 
read  over  your  brief  as  it  lay  beside  me,  and  upon  my  honor, 
Mr.  Flaw,  it  was  admirably  got  up.  Everything  depends  on 
the  brief " 

"  Glad  you  thought  so,  sir,"  replied  Flaw,  wondering  how 
it  was  that  he  had  never  before  thought  of  giving  a  brief  to 
Mr.  Hug. 

"  It's  a  great  mistake  of  counsel  not  to  pay  the  utmost  at- 
tention to  their  briefs.  For  my  part,"  continued  Mr.  Hug  in 
a  still  lower  tone,  "  I  make  a  point  of  reading  every  syllable 
in  my  brief,  however  long  it  is." 

"  It's  the  only  way,  depend  on  it,  sir.  We  attorneys,  you 
know,  see  and  know  so  much  of  the  case,  conversing  confi- 
dentially with  the  prisoners " 

"  Ay,  and  beyond  that.  Your  practical  suggestions,  my 

dear  sir,  are  often Now,  for  instance,  in  the  brief  I  was 

alluding  to  there  was,  I  recollect — one  most— uncommonly 
acute  suggestion." 

"Which  was  it,  sir?"  inquired  the  attorney  briskly,  his 
countenance  showing  the  progress  of  Hug's  lubricating  proc- 
ess. 

"  Oh — why— a— a — hem  !  "  stammered  Hug,  somewhat  non- 
plussed—" No ;  it  would  hardly  be  fair  to  Gobble,  and  I'm 
sorry  indeed " 

"  Well,well— it  can't  be  helped  now— but  I  must  say  that 
once  or  twice  latterly  I've  thought,  myself,  that  Mr.  Gobble 

has  rather By  the  way,  Mr.  Hug.  shall  you  be  in  town  this 

week,  till  the  end  of  the  sessions  ? 

"  Ye— e— s !  "  hastily  whispered  Hug,  after  glancing  guiltily 
towards  his  brethren,  who,  though  they  did  not  seem  to  do 
so,  were  really  watching  him  closely. 

"  I'm  happy  to  hear  it ! — You've  heard  of  Aaron  Doodle, 
who  was  committed  for  that  burglary  at ?  Well,  I  de- 
fend him,  and  shall  be  happy  to  give  you  the  brief.  Do  you 
lead  Mr.  Dolt  ?  "  Hug  nodded.  "  Then  he  will  be  your  junior. 
Where  are  your  chambers,  Mr.  Hug  ?  " 

"  No.  4,  Cant  Court,  Gray's  Inn.  When,  my  dear  sir,  does 
the  case  come  on  ?  " 

"  Thursday— perhaps  Wednesday." 

"  Then  do  come  and  breakfast  with  me,  and  we  can  talk  it 
•  over,  you  know,  so  nicely  together." 

"  Sir,  you're  very  polite.  I  will  do  myself  the  pleasure—" 
replied  Mr.  Flaw— and  took  wine  with  Mr.  Hug. 

This  little  stroke  of  business  over,  the  disengaged  couple 
were  at  liberty  to  do  the  general  conversation  of  the  table. 
Mr.  Bluster  and  Mr.  Slang  kept  the  company  in  almost  a  con- 
stant roar,  with  descriptions  of  scenes  in  court,  in  which  they 
had,  of  course,  been  the  principal  actors ;  and.  according  to 
their  own  accounts  they  must  be  wonderful  fellows.  Such 


262  TEN  THOUSAND  A-YEAE. 

brothers  of  judges  !— Such  bafflers  and  browbeaters  of  wit. 
nesses ! — Such  bamboozlers  of  juries  ! 

You  should  have  seen  the  sneering  countenance  of  Hug  all 
the  while.  He  never  once  smiled  or  laughed  at  the  brilliant 
sallies  of  his  brethren,  and  did  his  best  to  prevent  his  new 
patron,  Mr.  Flaw,  from  doing  so— constantly  putting  his  hand 
before  his  mouth,  and  whispering  into  Mr.  Flaw's  ear  at  the 
very  point  of  the  joke  or  story — and  the  smile  would  disap- 
pear from  the  countenance  of  Mr.  Flaw. 

The  alderman  laughed  till  the  tears  ran  out  of  his  little 
eyes,  which  he  constantly  wiped  with  his  napkin.  Amidst 
the  general  laughter  and  excitement,  Miss  Quirk,  lean- 
ing her  chin  on  her  hand,  her  elbow  resting  on  the  table,  sev- 
eral times  directed  soft,  languishing  looks  towards  Titmouse, 
unobserved  by  any  one  but  himself  ;  and  they  were  not  en- 
tirely unsuccessful,  although  Titmouse  was  wonderfully 
taken  with  the  stories  of  the  two  counsellors,  and  believed 
them  to  be  two  of  the  greatest  men  he  had  ever  seen  or  heard 
of,  and  at  the  head  of  their  profession. 

"  Ton  my  soul— I  hope,  sir,  you'll  have  those  two  gents  in 
my  case  ?  "  said  he  earnestly  to  Gammon. 

Unfortunately,  your  case   will  not   come  on  in    their 
courts,"  said  Gammon,  with  a  very  expressive  smile. 

"  Why,  can't  it  come  on  where  I  choose  ? — or  when  you 
like  ?  "  inquired  Titmouse  surprisedly. 

Mr.  Quirk  had  been  soured  during  the  whole  of  dinner,  for 
he  had  anxiously  desired  to  have  Titmouse  sit  beside  him  at 
the  bottom  of  the  table  ;  but  in  the  little  hubbub  attendant 
upon  coming  down  to  dinner  and  taking  places,  Titmouse 
slipped  out  of  sight  for  a  minute ;  and  when  all  were  placed, 
Quirk's  enraged  eye  perceived  him  sitting  in  the  middle  of 
the  table  beside  Gammon.  Gammon  always  got  hold  of  Tit- 
mouse. Old  Quirk  could  have  flung  a  decanter  at  his  head. 
— In  his  own  house ! — at  his  own  table !  Always  anticipating 
and  circumventing  him. 

"  Mr.  Quirk,  I  don't  think  we've  taken  a  glass  of  wine  to 

f  ether  yet,  have  we  ?  "  said  Gammon  with  a  bland  and  cor- 
ial  manner,  at  the  same  time  pouring  himself  out  a  glass  of 
wine.  He  perfectly  well  knew  what  was  annoying  his  re- 
spected partner,  whose  look  of  quaint  embarrassment,  when 
so  suddenly  assailed,  infinitely  amused  him.  "  Catch  me 
asking  you  here  again,  Master  Gammon,"  thought  Quirk, 
"  the  next  time  that  Titmouse  dines  here  ! "  The  reason  why 
Mr.  Snap  had  not  been  asked  was,  that  Quirk  had  some- 
slight  cause  to  suspect  his  having  conceived  the  notion  of 
paying  his  addresses  to  Miss  Quirk— a  thing  at  any  time  not 
particularly  palatable  to  Mr.  Quirk ;  but  in  the  present  con- 
juncture of  circumstances  quite  out  of  the  question,  and  in- 
tolerable even  in  the  idea.  Snap  was  not  slow  in  guessing 
the  reason  of  his  exclusion,  which  had  greatly  mortified,  and 
also  not  a  little  alarmed  him.  As  far  as  he  could  venture, 


TEN  THOUSAND  A-YEAR.  263 

he  had,  during  the  week,  endeavored  to  "  set "  Titmouse 
"  against  "  Miss  Quirk,  by  such  faint  disparaging  remarks 
and  insinuations  as  he  dared  venture  upon  witn  so  difficult 
a  subject  as  Titmouse,  whom  he  at  the  same  time  inflamed 
by  representations  of  the  splendid  matches  he  might  very 
soon  command  among  the  highest  women  of  the  land.  By 
these  means  Snap  had,  to  a  certain  extent,  succeeded  ;  but 
the  few  melting  glances  which  had  fallen  upon  Titmouse's 
sensitive  bosom  from  the  eyes  of  Miss  Quirk,  were  beginning 
to  operate  a  slight  change  in  his  feelings.  The  old  alderman 
on  the  intimation  that  the  "  ladies  were  going  to  withdraw," 
laid  violent  hands  on  Miss  Quirk,  (he  was  a  "  privileged  "  old 
fool,)  and  insisted  on  her  singing  his  favorite  song, — "My 
Friend  and  Pitcher"  His  request  was  so  warmly  seconded 
by  the  rest  of  the  company,  Titmouse  as  loud  and  eager  as 
any,  that  she  was  fain  to  comply.  She  sung  with  some 
sweetness,  and  much  self-possession.  She  carried  Titmouse's 
feelings  along  with  her  from  the  beginning,  as  Gammon,  who 
was  watching  him,  perceived, 

"  Most  uncommon  lovely  gal,  isn't  she  ? "  whispered  Tit- 
mouse, with  great  vivacity. 

"  Very !  "  replied  Gammon  dryly,  with  a  slight  smile. 

"  Shall  I  call  out  encore?  A'n't  that  the  word?  'Pon  my 
soul,  most  lovely  gal !  she  must  sing  it  again." 

"  BTo,  no— she  wishes  to  go— 'tis  not  usual :  she  will  sing  it 
for  you,  I  dare  say,  this  evening,  if  you  ask  her." 

"  Well— most  charming  gal !— Lovely !  "- 

"  Have  patience,  my  dear  Titmouse,"  said  Gammon,  in  a 
low  whisper,  "  in  a  few  months'  time  you'll  soon  be  thrown 
into  much  higher  life  than  this — among  really  beautiful,  and 
rich,  and  accomplished  women  " — [and,  thought  Gammon, 
you'll  resemble  a  monkey  that  has  found  his  way  into  a  rich 
tulip-bed !] 

"  Fancy  Miss  Tag-rag  standing  beside  her,"  whispered  Tit- 
mouse, scornfully. 

"  Ha,  ha ! "  gently  laughed  Gammon—"  both  of  them,  in 
their  way,  are  very  worthy  persons ;  but " — Here  the  ladies 
withdrew.  'Twas  no  part  of  Gammon's  plans  that  Titmouse 
should  become  the  son-in-law  of  either  Quirk  or  Tag-rag. 
Mr.  Gammon  had  formed  already,  vastly  different  plans  for 
him  ! 

As  soon  as  Quirk  had  taken  the  head  of  the  table,  and  the 
gentleman  drawn  together,  the  bottles  were  pushed  round 
very  briskly,  accompanied  by  no  less  than  tnree  different 
sorts  of  snuff-boxes,  all  belonging  to  Mr,  Quirk— all  of  them 
presents  from  clients.  One  was  a  huge  affair  of  Botany  Bay 
wood,  with  a  very  flaming  inscription  on  the  inside  of  the 
lid ;  from  which  it  appeared  that  its  amiable  donors,  who 
were  trying  the  effect  of  a  change  of  climate  on  their  moral 
health  at  the  expense  of  a  grateful  country,  owed  their  valu- 
able lives  to  the  professional  skill  and  exertions  of  "  Caleb 


264  TEN  THOUSAND  A-YEAR. 

Quirk,  Esq."  In  short,  the  other  two  were  trophies  of  a 
similar  description,  of  which  their  possessor  was  justly  not  a 
little  proud ;  and  as  he  saw  Titmouse  admiring  them,  it  oc- 
curred to  him  as  very  possible  that,  within  a  few  months' 
time,  he  should  be  in  possession  of  a  magnificent  gold  snuff- 
box, in  acknowledgment  of  the  services  Tie  should  have  ren- 
dered to  his  distinguished  guest  and  client.  Titmouse  was 
in  the  highest  possible  spirits.  This,  his  first  glimpse  into 
high  life,  equalled  all  his  expectations.  Round  and  round 
went  the  bottles— crack  went  joke  after  joke.  Slang  sung 
song  upon  song,  of,  however,  so  very  coarse  and  broad  a  char- 
acter as  infinitely  disgusted  Gammon,  and  apparently 
shocked  the  alderman  ;— though  I  greatly  distrust  that  old 
sinner's  sincerity  in  the  matter.  Then  Ghastly's  perform- 
ances commenced.  Poor  fellow  !  he  exerted  himself  to  the 
utmost  to  earn  the  good  dinner  he  had  just  devoured  :  but 
when  he  was  in  the  very  middle  of  one  of  his  most  impas- 
sioned scenes— undoubtedly  "  tearing  .a  passion  to  rags,"— 
Mr.  Quirk  interrupted,  impatiently—"  Come,  come,  Ghastly, 
we've  had  enough  of  that  sort— it  don't  suit  at  all !— Lord 
bless  us ! — don't  roar  so,  man ! " 

Poor  Ghastly  instantly  resumed  his  seat,  with  a  chagrined 
and  melancholy  air. 

"  Give  us  something  funny,"  snuffled  the  alderman. 

"  Let's  have  the  chorus  of  Pigs  and  Ducks,"  said  Quirk  ; 
"  you  do  that  remarkable  well.  I  could  fancy  the  animals 
were  running,  and  squealing,  and  quacking  all  about  the 
room."  The  actor  did  as-he  was  desired,  commencing  with 
a  sigh,  and  was  much  applauded.  At  length  Gammon  hap- 
pened to  get  into  a  discussion  with  Mr.  Bluster  on  some 
point  connected  with  the  Habeas  Corpus  Act,  in  which  our 
friend  Gammon,  who  never  got  heated  in  discussion,  and  was 
very  accurate  in  whatever  he  knew,  had  glaringly  the  best 
of  it.  His  calm,  smiling  self-possession  almost  drove  poor 
Bluster  frantic.  The  less  he  knew,  of  course,  the  louder  he 
'talked,  the  more  vehement  and  positive  he  became ;  at 
length  offering  a  bet  that  he  was  right ;  at  which  Gammon 
bowed,  smiled  and  closed  the  discussion.  While  engaged  in 
it  he  had  of  course  been  unable  to  keep  his  eyes  upon  Tit- 
mouse, who  drunk,  consequently,  like  a  little  nsh,  never  let- 
ting the  bottle  pass  him.  Every  one  about  him  filled  his  glass 
every  time— why  should  not  he  ? 

Hug  sat  next  to  Viper ;  feared  him,  and  avoided  discussion 
with  nim  ;  for,  though  they  agreed  in  their  politics,  which 
were  of  the  loosest  and  lowest  radical  description,  they  had 
a  personal  antipathy  each  to  the  other.  In  spite  of  their 
wishes,  they  at  length  got  entangled  in  a  very  virulent  con- 
troversy, and  said  so  many  insulting  things  to  each  other, 
that  the  rest  of  the  company,  who  had  for  some  time  been 
amused,  got  at  length— not  disgusted— but  alarmed,  for  the 
possible  results,  Mr-  Quirk,  therefore,  interfered., 


TEN  THOUSAND  A-YEAtt.  265 

"  Bravo !  bravo  !  bravo ! "  he  exclaimed,  as  Viper  con- 
cluded a  most  envenomed  passage,  "  that  will  do,  Viper — 
whip  it  into  the  next  Flash— 'twill  be  a  capital  leader !  It 
will  produce  a  sensation  !  And  in  the  meantime,  gentlemen, 
let  me  request  you  to  fill  your  glasses— bumpers— for  I  have 
a  toast  to  propose,  in  which  you'll  all  feel  interested  when 
you'll  hear  who's  the  subject  of  it.  It  is  a  gentleman  who 
is  likely  soon  to  be  elevated  to  a  station  which  Nature  has 
formed  him— hem !  hem  !— to  adorn — 

"  Mr.  Quirk's  proposing  your  health,  Titmouse ! "  whis- 
pered Gammon  to  his  companion,  who,  having  been  very 
restless  for  some  time,  had  at  length  become  quite  silent — 
his  head  resting  on  his  hand,  his  elbow  on  the  table — his 
eyes  languidly  half  open,  and  his  face  exceedingly  pale. 
Gammon  saw  that  he  was  in  truth  in  a  very  ticklish  con- 
dition. 

"  I— wish— you'd— let  me— go  out— I'm  devilish  ill  "—said 
Titmouse,  faintly.  Gammon  made  a  signal  to  Quirk,  who 
instantly  ceased  his  speech ;  and,  coming  down  to  Titmouse, 
he  and  Gammon  hastily  led  him  out  of  the  room,  and  into 
the  nearest  bed-chamber,  where  he  began  to  be  very  ill,  and 
so  continued  for  several  hours.  Old  Quirk,  who  was  a  long- 
headed man,  was  delighted  by  this  occurrence  ;  for  he  saw 
that  if  he  insisted  on  Titmouse's  being  put  to  bed,  and  pass- 
ing the  night— and  perhaps  the  next  day— at  Alibi  House,  it 
would  enable  Miss  Quirk  to  bring  her  attractions  to  bear 
upon  him  effectively,  by  exhibiting  those  delicate  and 
endearing  attentions  which  are  so  soothing,  and  indeed 
necessary  to  an  invalid.  Titmouse  continued  severely  in- 
disposed during  the  whole  of  the  night ;  and,  early  in  the 
morning,  it  was  thought  advisable  to  send  for  a  medical 
man,  who  pronounced  Titmouse  to  be  in  danger  of  a  bilious 
fever,  and  to  require  rest,  and  care,  and  medical  attendance 
for  some  days  to  come.  This  was  rather  "  too  much  of  a 
good  thing ''  for  old  Quirk— but  there  was  no  remedy.  Fore- 
seeing that  Titmouse  would  be  thrown  constantly,  for  some 
little  time  to  come,  into  Miss  Quirk's  company,  her  prudent 
parent  enjoined  upon  Mrs.  Alias,  his  sister,  the  necessity  of 
impressing  on  his  daughter's  mind  the  great  uncertainty 
that,  after  all,  existed  as  to  Titmouse's  prospects ;  and  the 
consequent  necessity  there  was  for  her  to  regulate  her  con- 
duct with  a  view  to  either  failure  or  success — to  keep  her 
affections,  as  it  were,  in  abeyance.  But  the  fact  was,  that 
Miss  Quirk  had  so  often  heard  the  subject  of  Titmouse's 
brilliant  expectations  talked  of  by  her  father,  and  knew  so 
well  his  habitual  prudence  and  caution,  that  she  looked  upon 
Titmouse's  speedy  possession  of  ten  thousand  a-year  as  a 
matter  almost  of  certainty.  She  was  a  girl  of  some  natural 
shrewdness,  but  of  an  early  inclination  to  maudlin  sentimen- 
tality. Had  she  been  blessed  with  the  vigilant  and  affection- 
ate care  of  a  mother  as  she  grew  up,  (her  mother  having  died 


266  TEN  THOUSAND  A-YEAR. 

when  Miss  Quirk  was  but  a  child,)  and  been  thrown  among 
a  different  set  of  people  from  those  who  constantly  visited  at 
Alibi  House— and  of  whom  a  very  favorable  specimen  has 
been  laid  before  the  reader— Miss  Quirk  might  really  have 
become  a  very  sensible  and  agreeable  girl.  As  it  was,  her 
manners  had  contracted  a  certain  coarseness,  which  at  length 
overspread  her  whole  character,  and  the  selfish  and  merce- 
nary motives  by  which  she  could  not  fail  to  perceive  all  her 
father's  conduct  regulated,  infected  herself.  She  resolved, 
therefore,  to  be  governed  by  the  considerations  so  urgently 
pressed  upon  her  by  both  her  father  and  her  aunt. 

It  was  several  days  before  Titmouse  was  allowed,  by  his 
medical  men,  to  quit  his  bedroom ;  and  it  is  impossible  for 
any  woman  not  to  be  touched  by  the  sight  of  a  sudden  change 
effected  in  a  man  by  severe  indisposition  and  suffering- 
even  be  that  man  so  poor  a  creature  as  Titmouse.  He  was 
very  pale  and  considerably  reduced  by  the  severe  nature  of 
his  complaint,  and  of  the  powerful  medicines  which  had  been 
administered  to  him.  When  he  made  his  first  appearance 
before  Miss  Quirk,  one  afternoon,  with  somewhat  feeble  gait, 
and  a  languid  air  that  mitigated,  if  it  did  not  obliterate,  the 
foolish  and  conceited  expression  of  his  features,  she  really 
regarded  him  with  considerable  interest ;  and,  though  she 
might  hardly  have  owned  it  even  to  herself,  his  expected 
good  fortune  invested  him  with  a  kind  of  subdued  radiance. 
Ten  thousand  a-year  ! — Miss  Quirk's  heart  fluttered !  By  the 
time  that  he  was  well  enough  to  take  his  departure,  she  had, 
at  his  request,  read  over  to  him  nearly  half  of  that  truly 
interesting  work— the  Newgate  Calendar ;  she  had  sung  to 
him,  and  played  to  him,  whatever  he  asked  her ;  and,  in 
short,  she  felt  that  if  she  could  but  be  certain  that  he  would 
gain  his  great  lawsuit,  and  step  into  ten  thousand  a-year,  she 
could  love  him.  She  insisted,  on  the  day  of  his  quitting  Alibi 
House,  that  he  should  write  in  her  album ;  and  he  very 
readily  complied.  It  was  nearly  ten  minutes  before  he  could 
get  a  pen  to  suit  him.  At  length  he  succeeded,  and  left  the 
following  interesting  memento  of  himself,  in  the  very  centre 
of  a  fresh  page  : — 

"  Tittlebat  Titmouse  is  My  name, 

England  is  My  Nation, 
London  is  My  dwelling-Place, 
And  Christ  is  My  Salvation. 

"  TITTLEBAT  TITMOUSE, 
"  halibi  lodge." 

Miss  Quirk  turned  pale  with  astonishment  and  vexation 
on  seeing  this  elegant  and  interesting  addition  to  her  album. 
Titmouse,  on  the  contrary,  looked  at  it  Math  no  little  pride ; 
for  having  had  a  capital  pen,  and  his  heart  being  in  his  task, 
he  had  produced  what  he  conceived  to  be  a  very  superior 


TEN  THOUSAND  A-YEAB.  267 

specimen  of  penmanship :  in  fact,  the  signature  was  by  far 
the  best  he  nad  ever  written.  When  he  had  gone,  Miss 
Quirk  was  twenty  times  on  the  point  of  tearing  out  the  leaf 
which  had  been  so  dismally  disfigured ;  but  on  her  father 
coming  home  in  the  evening,  ho  laughed  heartily—"  and  as  to 
tearing  it  out,"  said  he, "  let  us  first  see  which  way  the  verdict 
is." 

Titmouse  became,  after  this,  a  pretty  frequent  visitor  at 
Alibi  House ;  growing  more  and  more  attached  to  Miss  Quirk, 
who,  however,  conducted  herself  towards  him  with  much 
judgment.  His  inscription  on  her  album  had  done  a  vast 
deal  towards  cooling  down  the  ardor  with  which  she  had 
been  disposed  to  regard  even  the  future  owner  of  ten  thou- 
sand a-year.  Poor  Snap  seemed  to  have  lost  all  chance,  being 
treated  with  greater  coldness  by  Miss  Quirk  on  every  succeed- 
ing visit  to  Alibi  House.  At  this  he  was  sorely  discomfited ; 
for  she  would  have  whatever  money  her  father  might  die 
possessed  of,  besides  a  commanding  interest  in  the  partner- 
ship business.  'Twas  a  difficult  thing  for  him  to  preserve 
his  temper  in  his  close  intimacy  with  Titmouse,  who  had  so 
grievously  interfered  with  his  prospects. 

The  indisposition  I  have  been  mentioning,  prevented  Tit- 
mouse from  paying  his  promised  visit  to  Satin  Lodge.  On 
returning  to  his  lodgings,  from  Alibi  House,  he  found  that 
Tag-rag  had  either  called  or  sent  every  day  to  inquire  after 
him  with  the  most  affectionate  anxiety ;  and  one  or  two  notes 
lying  on  his  table,  apprised  him  of  the  lively  distress  which 
the  ladies  of  Satin  Lodge  were  enduring  on  his  account,  and 
implored  him  to  lose  not  a  moment  in  communicating  the 
state  of  his  health,  and  personally  assuring  them  of  his  safety. 
Though  the  image  of  Miss  Quirk  was  continually  before  his 
eyes,  Titmouse,  nevertheless,  had  cunning  enough  not  to  drop 
the  slightest  hint  to  the  Tag-rags  of  the  true  state  of  his  feel- 
ings. Whenever  any  inquiry,  with  ill-disguised  anxiety,  was 
made  by  Mrs.  Tag-rag  concerning  Alibi  House  and  its  in- 
mates. Titmouse  would,  to  be  sure,  mention  Miss  Quirk,  but 
in  such  a  careless  and  slighting  way  as  gave  great  consolation 
and  encouragement  to  Tag-rag,  his  wife,  and  daughter.  When 
at  Mr.  Quirk's,  he  spoke  somewhat  unreservedly  of  the  ami- 
able inmates  of  Satin  Lodge.  These  two  mansions  were  al- 
most the  only  private  residences  visited  by  Titmouse,  who 
spent  his  time  much  in  the  way  which  I  have  already  de- 
scribed. How  he  got  through  his  days  I  can  hardly  tell.  At 
his  lodgings  he  got  up  very  late,  and  went  to  bed  very  late. 
He  never  read  anything  excepting  occasionally  a  song-book 
lent  him  by  Snap,  or  a  novel,  or  some  such  book  as  "  Boxi- 
ana,"  from  the  circulating  library.  Dawdling  over  his  dress 
and  his  breakfast,  then  whistling  and  humming,  took  up  so 
much  of  every  day  as  he  passed  at  his  lodgings.  The  rest 
was  spent  in  idling  about  the  town,  looking  in  at  shop  win- 
dows, and  now  and  then  going  to  some  petty  exhibition. 


268  TEN  THOUSAND  A-TEAR. 

When  evening  came,  he  was  generally  joined  by  Snap,  when 
they  would  spend  the  night  in  the  manner  I  have  already 
described.  As  often  as  he  dared,  he  called  at  Messrs.  Quirk, 
Gammon,  and  Snap's  office  at  Saffron  Hill,  and  worried  them 
not  a  little  by  inquiries  concerning  the  state  of  his  affairs, 
and  the  cause  of  the  delay  in  commencing  proceedings.  As 
for  Huckaback,  by  the  way,  Titmouse  cut  him  entirely ;  say- 
ing that  he  was  a  devilish  low  fellow,  and  it  was  no  use 
knowing  him.  He  made  many  desperate  efforts,  both  per- 
sonally and  by  letter,  to  renew  his  acquaintance  with  Tit- 
mouse, but  in  vain.  I  may  as  well  mention,  by  the  way,  that 
as  soon  as  Snap  got  scent  of  the  little  money  transaction  be- 
tween his  friend  and  Huckaback,  he  called  upon  the  latter, 
and  tendering  him  twelve  shillings,  demanded  up  the  docu- 
ment which  he  had  extorted  from  Titmouse.  Huckaback 
held  put  obstinately  for  some  time — but  Snap  was  too  much 
for  him,  and  talked  in  such  a  formidable  strain  about  an  in- 
dictment for  conspiracy  (!)  and  fraud,  that  Huckaback  at 
length  consented,  on  receiving  twelve  shillings,  to  deliver  up 
the  document  to  Snap,  on  condition  of  Snap  s  destroying  it 
on  the  spot.  This  was  done,  and  so  ended  all  intercourse— 
at  least  on  this  side  of  the  grave— between  Titmouse  and 
Huckaback. 

The  sum  allowed  by  Messrs.  Quirk  and  Gammon  to  Tit- 
mouse, was  amply  sufficient  to  have  kept  him  in  comfort ; 
but  it  never  would  have  enabled  him  to  lead  the  kind  of  life 
which  I  have  described— and  he  would  certainly  have  got 
very  awkwardly  involved,  had  it  not  been  for  the  kindness 
of  Snap  in  advancing  him,  from  time  to  time,  such  sums  as 
his  exigencies  required.  In  fact,  matters  went  on  as  quietly 
and  smoothly  as  possible  for  several  months— till  about  the 
middle  of  November,  when  an  event  occurred  that  seemed 
to  threaten  the  total  demolition  of  all  his  hopes  and  expecta- 
tions. 

He  had  not  seen  or  heard  from  Messrs.  Quirk  or  Gammon 
for  nearly  a  fortnight ;  Snap  he  had  not  seen  for  nearly  a 
week.  At  length  he  ventured  to  make  his  appearance  at 
Saffron  Hill,  and  was  received  with  a  startling  coldness— a 
stern  abruptness  of  manner,  that  frightened  him  out  of  his 
wits.  All  the  three  partners  were  alike— as  for  Snap,  the  con- 
trast between  his  present  and  his  former  manner  was  per- 
fectly shocking;  he  seemed  quite  another  person.  The  fact 
was,  that  the  full  statement  of  Titmouse's  claims  had  been 
laid  before  Mr.  Subtle,  the  leading  counsel  retained  in  his  be- 
half, for  his  opinion,  before  actually  commencing  proceed- 
ings ;  and  the  partners  were  indeed  thunderstruck  on  re- 
ceiving that  opinion :  for  Mr.  Subtle  pointed  out  a  radical 
deficiency  of  proof  in  a  matter  which,  as  soon  as  their  atten- 
tion was  thus  pointedly  called  to  it,  Messrs.  Quirk  and  Gam- 
mon were  amazed  at  their  haying  overlooked,  and  still  more 
at  its  having  escaped  the  notice  of  Mr.  Tresayle,  Mr.  Morty 


TEN  THOUSAND  A-YEAR.  269 

main,  and  Mr.  Frankpledge.  Mr.  Quirk  hurried  with  the 
opinions  to  the  first  two  gentlemen ;  and  after  a  long  inter- 
view with  each,  they  owned  their  fears  that  Mr.  Subtle  was 
right,  and  that  the  defect  seemed  incurable ;  but  they  showed 
their  agitated  clients,  that  they  had  been  guilty  of  neither 
oversight  nor  ignorance,  inasmuch  as  the  matter  in  question 
was  one  of  evidence  only — one  which  a  nisi  prius  lawyer,  with 
a  full  detail  of  "proofs"  before  him,  could  hardly  fail  to 
light  upon— but  which,  it  would  be  found,  had  been  "assumed 
and  taken  for  granted  in  the  cases  laid  before  conveyancers. 
They  promised  to  turn  it  over  in  their  minds,  and  to"  let 
Messrs.  Quirk  and  Gammon  know  if  anything  occurred  to 
vary  their  impression.  Mr.  Tresayle  and  Mr.  Mortmain, 
however,  preserved  an  ominous  silence.  As  for  Frankpledge, 
he  had  a  knack,  somehow  or  another,  of  always  coming  to 
the  conclusion  wished  and  hoped  for  by  his  clients;  and, 
after  prodigious  pains,  wrote  a  very  long  opinion,  to  show 
that  there  was  nothing  in  the  objection.  Neither  Mr.  Quirk 
nor  Mr.  Gammon  could  understand  the  process  by  which  Mr. 
Frankpledge  arrived  at  such  a  result ;  but,  in  despair,  they 
laid  his  opinion  before  Mr.  Subtle,  in  the  shape  of  a  second 
case  for  his  opinion.  It  was,  in  a  few  days'  time,  returned 
to  them,  with  only  a  line  or  two — thus  : — 

"  With  every  respect  for  the  gentleman  who  wrote  this 
opinion,  I  cannot  perceive  what  it  has  to  do  with  the  ques- 
tion. I  see  no  reason  whatever  to  depart  from  the  view  I 
have  already  taken  of  this  case.— J.  S." 

Here  was  something  like  a  dead  lock,  indeed ! 

"  We're  done,  Gammon  !  "  said  Quirk  with  a  dismayed  air. 
Gammon  seemed  lost,  and  made  no  answer. 

"  Does  anything— eh  ?  Anything  occur  to  you  ?  Gammon, 
I  will  say  this  for  you — you're  a  long-headed  fellow !  "  Still 
Gammon  spoke  not. 

"  Gammon !  Gammon !  I  really  believe— you  begin  to  see 
something." 

"It's  to  be  done,  Mr.  Quirk! "  said  Gammon  at  length,  with 
a  grave  and  apprehensive  look,  and  a  cheek  paler  than  be- 
fore. 

"Eh  ?  how?  Oh,  I  see!— Know  what  you  mean.  Gammon;" 
replied  Quirk  with  a  hurried  whisper,  glancing  at  both  doors 
to  see  that  they  were  safe. 

"  We  must  resume  our  intercourse  with  Titmouse,  and  let 
matters  go  on  as  before,"  said  Gammon  with  a  very  anxious, 
but,  at  the  same  time,  a  determined  air. 

"  I — I  wonder  if  what  has  occurred  to  you  is  what  has  oc- 
curred to  me  ?"  inquired  Quirk  in  an  eager  whisper. 

"  Pooh  !  pooh  !  Mr.  Quirk." 

"  Gammon,  dear  Gammon,  no  mystery !  You  know  I  have 
a  deep  stake  in  this  matter ! " 

"  So  have  I,  Mr.  Quirk,"  replied  Gammon  with  a  sigh. 
*'  However  "—Here  the  partners  put  their  heads  close  to- 


270  TEN  THOUSAND  A-YEAE. 

gether,  and  whispered  to  each  other  in  a  low,  earnest  tone 
for  some  minutes.    Quirk  rose  from  his  seat,  and  took  two 
or  three  turns  about  the  room  in  silence,  Gammon  watching  . 
him  calmly. 

To  his  inexpressible  relief  and  joy,  within  a  few  hours  of 
the  happening  of  the  above  colloquy,  Titmouse  found  him- 
self placed  on  precisely  his  former  footing  with  Messrs.  Quirk, 
Gammon,  and  Snap. 

In  order  to  bring  on  the  cause  for  trial  at  the  next  spring 
assizes,  it  was  necessary  that  the  declaration  in  ejectment 
should  be  served  on  the  tenant  in  possession  before  Hilary 
term:  and,  in  a  matter  of  such  magnitude,  it  was  deemed 
expedient  for  Snap  to  go  down  and  personally  effect  the  ser- 
vice in  question.  In  consequence,  also,  of  some  very  impor- 
tant suggestions  as  to  the  evidence,  given  by  the  junior  in 
the  cause,  it  was  arranged  that  Snap  should  go  down  about  a 
week  before  the  time  fixed  upon  for  effecting  the  service,  and 
make  minute  inquiries  as  to  one  or  two  facts  which  it  was 
understood  could  be  established  in  evidence.  As  soon  as 
Titmouse  heard  of  this  movement,  that  Snap  was  going 
direct  to  Yatton,  the  scene  of  his,  Titmouse's,  future  great- 
ness, he  made  the  most  pertinacious  and  vehement  entrea- 
ties to  Messrs.  Quirk  and  Gammon  to  be  allowed  to  accom- 
pany him,  even  going  down  on  his  knees.  There  was  no  re- 
sisting this ;  but  they  exacted  a  solemn  pledge  from  him  that 
he  would  place  himself  entirely  at  the  disposal  of  Snap ;  go 
under  some  feigned  name,  and,  in  short,  neither  say  nor  do 
anything  tending  to  disclose  their  real  character  or  errand. 

Snap  and  Titmouse  established  themselves  at  the  Hare 
and  Hounds  Inn  at  Grilston ;  and  the  former  immediately 
began,  cautiously  and  quietly,  to  collect  such  evidence  as  he 
could  discover.  One  of  the  first  persons  to  whom  he  went 
was  old  blind  Bess.  His  many  pressing  questions  at  length 
stirred  up  in  the  old  woman's  mind  recollections  of  long-for- 
gotten names,  persons,  places,  scenes,  and  associations  there- 
by producing  an  agitation  not  easily  to  be  got  rid  of,  and 
which  had  by  no  means  subsided  when  Dr.  Tatham  and  Mr. 
Aubrey  paid  her  the  Christmas-day  visit,  which  has  been  al- 
ready described. 


CHAPTER  XI. 

THE  reader  has  had  already  pretty  distinct  indications  of 
the  manner  in  which  Titmouse  and  Snap  conducted  them- 
selves during  their  stay  in  Yorkshire,  and  which,  I  fear,  have 
not  tended  to  raise  either  of  these  gentlemen  in  the  reader's 
estimation.  Titmouse  manifested  a  very  natural  anxiety  to 
see  the  present  occupants  of  Yatton ;  and  it  was  with  infinite 


TEN  THOUSAND  A-YEAtt.  071 

difficulty  that  Snap  could  prevent  him  from  sneaking  about 
in  the  immediate  neighborhood  of  the  Hall,  with  the  hope  of 
seeing  them.  His  first  encounter  with  Mr.  and  Miss  Aubrey 
was  entirely  accidental,  as  the  reader  may  remember ;  and 
when  he  found  that  the  lady  on  horseback  near  Yatton,  and 
the  lady  whom  he  had  striven  to  attract  the  notice  of  in 
Hyde  Fark,  were  one  and  the  same  beautiful  woman,  and 
that  that  beautiful  woman  was  neither  more  nor  less  than 
the  sister  of  the  present  owner  of  Yatton— the  marvellous  dis- 
covery created  a  mighty  pother  in  his  little  feelings.  The 
blaze  of  Kate  Aubrey's  beauty,  in  an  instant  consumed  the 
images  both  of  Tabitha  Tag-rag  and  Dora  Quirk.  It  even 
for  a  while  outshone  the  splendors  of  ten  thousand  a-year : 
such  is  the  inexpressible  and  incalculable  power  of  woman's 
beauty  over  everything  in  the  shape  of  man — over  even  so 
despicable  a  sample  of  him  as  Tittlebat  Titmouse. 

While  putting  in  practice  some  of  those  abominable  tricks  to 
which,  under  Snap  s  tutelage,  Titmouse  had  become  accus- 
tomed in  walking  the  streets  of  London,  and  from  which 
even  the  rough  handling  they  had  got  from  farmer  Hazel 
could  not  turn  him,  Titmouse  at  length,  as  has  been  seen, 
most  unwittingly  fell  foul  of  that  fair  creature,  Catharine 
Aubrey  herself ;  who  seemed  truly  like  an  angelic  messenger 
returning  from  her  errand  of  sympathy  and  mercy,  and  sud- 
denly beset  by  a  little  imp  of  darkness.  When  Titmouse 
discovered  who  was  the  object  of  his  audacious  and  revolt- 
ing advances,  his  soul  was  petrified  within  him ;  and  it  was 
fortunate  that  the  shriek  of  Miss  Aubrey's  attendant  at 
length  startled  him  into  a  recollection  of  a  pair  of  heels,  to 
which  he  was  that  evening  indebted  for  an  escape  from  a 
most  murderous  cudgeling,  which  might  have  been  attended 
with  one  effect  not  contemplated  by  him  who  inflicted  it ;  viz., 
the  retention  of  the  Aubreys  in  the  possession  of  Yatton  ! 
Titmouse  ran  for  nearly  hali-a-mile  on  the  high-road  towards 
Grilston,  without  stopping.  He  dared  not  venture  back  to 
Yatton,  with  the  sound  of  the  lusty  farmer's  voice  in  his  ears, 
to  get  back  from  the  Aubrey  Arms  the  horse  which  had 
brought  him  that  afternoon  from  Grilston,  to  which  place 
he  walked  on,  through  the  snow  and  darkness  ;  reaching  his 
inn  in  a  perfect  panic,  from  which,  at  length,  a  tumbler  of 
stiff  brandy  and  water,  with  two  or  three  cigars,  somewhat 
relieved  him.  Forgetful  of  the  solemn  pledge  which  he  had 
given  to  Messrs.  Quirk,  Gammon  and  Snap,  not  to  disclose 
his  name  or  errand,  and  it  never  once  occurring  to  him  that, 
if  he  would  but  keep  his  own  counsel,  Miss  Aubrey  could 
never  identify  him  with  the  ruffian  who  had  assailed  her,  he 
spent  the  interval  between  eight  and  twelve  o'clock,  at 
which  latter  hour  the  coach  by  which  he  had  resolved  to 
return  to  London  would  pass  through  Grilston,  in  indicting 
the  following  letter  to  Miss  Aubrey :— 


•272  TEN  THOUSAND 

"  Grilston,  January  6th,  18 — . 
"  HONOURED  Miss, 

"Hoping  No  Offence  Will  Be  Taken  where  None  is  meant, 
(which  am  Sure  of,)  This  I  send  To  say  Who  I  Am  which,  Is 
the  Right  And  True  Owner  of  Yattpn  which  You  'Enjoy 
Amongst  You  All  At  This  present  (Till  The  Law  Give  it  to 
Me)  Which  It  quickly  Will  And  which  It  Ought  to  Have 
done  When  I  were  First  born  And  Before  Yr  Respect. 
-Family  ever  Came  into  it,  And  All  which  Yr.  hond.  Brother 
Have  so  unlawfully  Got  possession  Of  must  Come  Back  to 
Them  Whose  Due  It  is  wh.  Is  myself  as  will  be  Sone  provd. 
And  wh.  am  most  truely  Sorry  Of  on  your  own  Acct.  (Mean- 
ing (hond.  Miss,)  you  Alone)  as  Sure  as  Yattori  is  Intirely 
Mine  So  My  Heart  Is  yours  and  Xo  Longer  my  Own  Ever 
since  I  Saw  You  first  as  Can  Easily  prove  but  wh.  doubtless 
You  Have  forgot  Seeing  You  Never  New,  seeing  (as  Mr. 
Gammon,  My  Sollicitor  And  a  Very  Great  Lawyer,  say)  Cases 
Alter  Circumstances,  what  Can  I  say  More  Than  that  I  Love 
you  Most  Amazing  Such  As  Never  Thought  Myself  Cap- 
able of  Doing  Before  and  wh.  cannot  help  Ever  Since  I  First 
saw  Yor.  most  Lovely  and  Divine  and  striking  Face  wh. 
have  Stuck  In  my  Miiid  Ever  Since  Day  and  Night  Sleeping 
and  Waking  I  will  Take  my  Oath  Never  Of  Having  Lov'd 
Any  one  Else,  though  (must  Say)  have  Had  a  W9nderful 
Man  j  Offers  From  Females  of  The  Highest  Rank  Since  my 
Truly  Wonderful  Good  fortune  got  talked  About  every  Where 
but  have  Refused  Them  All  for  yr  sake,  And  Would  All  the 
World  But  you.  When  I  Saw  You  on  Horseback  It  was  All 
my  Sudden  confusion  In  Seeing  you  (The  Other  Gent,  was 
One  of  my  Respe.  Solicitors)  wh  Threw  Me  off  in  that  Ridi- 
culous Way  wh  was  a  Great  Mortification  And  made  My  brute 
Of  A  horse  go  on  so  For  I  Remembered  You  and  was  Won- 
derful struck  with  Your  Improved  Appearance  (As  that 
Same  Gent,  can  Testify)  And  you  was  (Hond.  Miss)  Quite 
Wrong  To  Night  when  You  Spoke  so  Uncommon  Angry  To 
Me,  Seeing  If  I  Had  Only  Known  What  Female  it  Was 
(meaning  yourself  which  I  respect  So)  out  so  Late  Alone  I 
should  Have  spoke  quite  Different  So  hope  You  Will  Think 
Nothing  More  Of  that  Truly  Unpleasant  Event  Now  (Hond. 
Madam)  What  I  have  To  say  Is  if  You  Will  Please  To  Con- 
descend To  Yield  To  My  Desire  We  Can  Live  Most  uncom- 
mon Comfortable  at  Yatton  Together  wh.  Place  shall  Have 
Great  Pleasure  in  Marrying  You  From  and  I  may  (perhaps) 
Do  Something  Handsome  for  yr.  respectable  Brother  And 
Family,  wh.  can  Often  Come  to  see  us  And  Live  in  the  Neigh- 
borhood, if  You  Refuse  me,  Will  not  say  What  shall  Happen 
to  Those  which  (am  Told)  Owe  me  a  Precious  Long  Figiire 
wh.  May  (perhaps)  Make  a  Handsome  Abatement  in,  if  You 
And  I  Hit  it. 


TEN  THOUSAND  A-YEAR.  273 

"  Hoping  You  Will  Forget  What  Have  So  Much  Grieva 
me  And  Write  pr.  return  of  Post, 

"  Am,  hond.  Miss 

"  Yr  most  Loving  of  Devoted  Servant, 
"(Till  Death) 

TITTLEBAT  TITMOUSE. 
"  (Private) " 

This  equally  characteristic  and  disgusting  production,  its 
accomplished  writer  sealed  twice,  and  then  left,  together 
with  sixpence,  in  the  hands  of  the  landlady  of  the  Hare  and 
Hounds,  to  be  delivered  at  Yatton  Hall  the  first  thing  in  the 
morning.  The  good  woman  however — having  no  particular 
wish  to  oblige  such  a  strange  puppy,  whom  she  was  only  too 
glad  to  get  rid  of,  and  haying  a  good  deal  to  attend  to— laid 
the  letter  aside  on  the  chimney-piece,  and  entirely  lost  sight 
of  it  for  nearly  a  fortnight.  Shortly  after  the  lamentable 
tidings  concerning  the  impending  misfortunes  of  the  Aubrey 
family  had  been  communicated  to  the  inhabitants  of  Grilston 
she  forwarded  the  letter,  (little  dreaming  of  the  character 
in  which  its  writer  was  likely,  erelong,  to  re-appear  at  Gril- 
ston,] together  with  one  or  two  others,  a  day  or  two  after 
Miss  Aubrey  had  had  the  interview  Ayith  her  brother  which 
I  have  described  to  the  reader ;  but  it  lay  unnoticed  by  any 
one— above  all  by  the  sweet  sufferer  whose  name  was  indi- 
cated on  it — among  a  great  number  of  miscellaneous  letters 
and  papers  which  had  been  suffered  to  accumulate  on  the 
library  table. 

Mr.  Aubrey  entered  the  library  one  morning  alone,  for  the 
purpose  of  attending  to  many  matters  which  had  been  long 
neglected.  He  was  evidently  thinner  :  his  face  was  pale,  and 
his  manner  dejected :  still  there  was  about  him  an  air  of 
calmness  and  resolution.  Through  the  richly-pictured  old 
stained-glass  window,  the  molten  sunbeams  were  streaming 
in  a  kind  of  tender  radiance  upon  the  dear  old  familiar 
objects  around  him.  All  was  silent.  Having  drawn  his 
chair  to  the  table,  on  which  were  lying  a  confused  heap  of 
letters  and  papers,  he  felt  a  momentary  repugnance  to  enter 
upon  the  task  which  he  had  assigned  to  himself,  of  opening 
and  attending  to  them ;  and  walked  slowly  for  some  time  up 
and  down  the  room,  with  folded  arms,  uttering  occasionally 
profound  sighs.  At  length  he  sat  down,  and  commenced 
the  disheartening  task  of  opening  the  many  letters  before 
him.  One  of  the  first  he  opened  was  from  Peter  Johnson 
— the  old  tenant  to  whom  he  had  lent  the  sum  of  two  hun- 
dred pounds ;  and  it  was  full  of  expressions  of  gratitude  and 
respect.  Then  came  a  letter,  a  fortnight  old,  bearing  the 

frank  of  Lord ,  the  Secretary  of  State  for  Foreign  Affairs, 

He  opened  it  and  read : — 


274  TEN  THOUSAND  A-YEAE. 

Whitehall,  16th  January,  18 — . 
k<  MY  DEAR  AUBREY, 

"  You  will  remember  that  Lord 's  motion  stands  for 

the  28th.  We  all  venture  to  calculate  upon  receiving  your 
powerful  support  in  the  debate.  We  expect  to  be  much 

pressed  with  the  Duke  of 's  affair,  which  you  handled 

shortly  before  the  recess  with  such  signal  ability  and  suc- 
cess. When  you  return  to  town,  you  must  expect  a  renewal 
of  certain  offers,  which  I  most  sincerely  trust,  for  the  benefit 
of  the  public  service,  will  not  be  again  declined. 

'  Ever  yours  faithfully, 

"  (Private  and  confidential.) 
"  CHARLES  AUBREY,  ESQ.,  M.P." 

Mr.  Aubrey  laid  down  the  letter  calmly,  as  soon  as  he  had 
read  it;  and,  leaning  back  in  his  chair,  seemed  lost  in 
thought  for  several  minutes.  Presently  he  re-applied  him- 
self to  his  task,  and  opened  and  glanced  over  a  great  many 
letters ;  the  contents  of  several  of  which  occasioned  him 
deep  emotion.  Some  were  from  persons  in  distress  whom 
he  had  assisted,  and  who  implored  a  continuance  of  his  aid  ; 
others  were  from  ardent  political  friends— some  sanguine, 
others  desponding — concerning  the  prospects  of  the  session. 
Two  or  three  hinted  that  it  was  everywhere  reported  that  he 
had  been  offered  one  of  the  under  secretaryships,  and  had 
declined ;  but  that  it  was,  at  the  king's  desire,  to  be  pressed 
upon  him.  Many  letters  were  on  private,  and  still  more  on 
country  business ;  and  with  one  of  them  he  was  engaged, 
when  a  servant  entered  with  one  of  that  morning's  county 
papers.  Tired  with  his  task,  Mr.  Aubrey  rose  from  his  chair 
as  the  servant  gave  him  the  paper ;  and,  standing  before  the 
fire,  unfolded  the  Yorkshire  Stingo,  and  glanced  listlessly 
over  its  miscellaneous  contents.  At  length  his  eye  lit  upon 
the  following  paragraph : — 

''  The  rumors  so  deeply  affecting  a  member  for  a  certain 
borough  in  this  county,  and  to  which  we  alluded  in  our  last 
paper  but  one,  turn  out  to  be  well-founded.  A  claimant  has 
started  up  to  the  very  large  estates  at  present  held  by  the 
gentleman  in  question ;  and  we  are  very  much  misinformed 
if  the  ensuing  spring  assizes  will  not  effect  a  considerable 
change  in  the  representation  of  the  borough  alluded  to,  by 
relieving  it  from  the  Tory  thraldom  under  which  it  has 
been  so  long  oppressed.  We  have  no  wish  to  be  hard  upon 
a  falling  man  ;  and,  therefore,  shall  make  no  comment  upon 
the  state  of  mind  in  which  that  person  may  be  presumed  to 
be,  who  must  be  conscious  of  having  been  so  long  enjoying 
the  just  rights  of  others.  Some  extraordinary  disclosures 
may  be  looked  for  when  the  trial  comes  on.  We  have  heard 
from  a  quarter  on  which  we  are  disposed  to  place  reliance, 
that  the  claimant  -is  a  gentleman  of  decided  Whig  principles, 


TEN  THOUSAND  A-TEAR.  275 

and  who  will  prove  a  valuable  accession  to  the  Liberal 
cause." 

Mr.  Aubrey  was  certainly  somewhat  shocked  by  brutality 
such  as  this  ;  but,  on  Miss  Aubrey's  entering  the  room,  he 
quietly  folded  up  the  paper  and  laid  it  aside,  fearful  lest  his 
sister's  feelings  should  be  pierced  by  so  coarse  and  cruel  a 
paragraph,  which,  in  fact,  had  been  concocted  in  London  in 
the  office  of  Quirk,  Gammon,  and  Snap,  who  were,  as  before 
stated,  interested  in  the  /Sunday  Flash,  which  was  in  some 
sort  connected,  through  the  relationship  of  the  editors,  with 
the  Yorkshire  Stingo.  The  idea  had  been  suggested  by 
Gammon,  of  attempting  to  enlist  the  political  feeling  of  a 
portion  of  the  county  in  favor  of  their  client. 

"  Here  are  several  letters  for  you,  Kate,"  said  her  brother, 
picking  several  of  them  out.  The  very  first  she  took  up,  it 
having  attracted  her  attention  by  the  double  seal,  and  the 
vulgar  style  of  the  handwriting,  was  that  from  Titmouse, 
which  has  just  been  laid  before  the  reader.  With  much  sur- 
prise she  opened  the  letter,  her  brother  being  similarly  en- 
gaged with  his  own ;  and  her  face  getting  gradually  paler 
and  paler  as  she  went  on,  at  length  she  flung  it  on  the  floor, 
with  a  passionate  air,  and  burst  into  tears.  Her  brother, 
with  astonishment,  exclaimed,—"  Dear  Kate,  what  is  it  ?  " 
and  he  rose  and  stooped  to  pick  up  the  letter. 

"  Don't— don't,  Charles  !  she  cried,  putting  her  foot  upon 
it,  and  flinging  her  arras  round  his  neck.  "It  is  an 
audacious  letter — a  vulgar,  a  cruel  letter,  dear  Charles ! " 
Her  emotion  increased  as  her  thoughts  recurred  to  the 
heartless  paragraph  concerning  her  brother  with  which  the 
letter  concluded.  "  I  could  have  overlooked  everything  but 
lhat"  said  she,  unwittingly.  With  gentle  force  he  succeeded 
in  getting  hold  of  the  painfully  ridiculous  and  contemptible 
effusion.  He  attempted  faintly  to  smile  several  times  as  he 
went  on. 

"Don't— don't,  dearest  Charles !  I  can't  bear  it.  Don't 
smile — It's  very  far  from  your  heart;  you  do  it  only  to 
assure  me" 

Here  Mr.  Aubrey  read  the  paragraph  concerning  himself. 
His  face  turned  a  little  paler  than  before,  and  his  lips 
quivered  with  suppressed  emotion.  "  He  is  evidently  a  very 
foolish  fellow ! "  he  exclaimed,  walking  towards  the  window, 
with  his  back  to  his  sister,  whom  he  did  not  wish  to  see  how 
much  he  was  affected  by  so  petty  an  incident. 

"  What  does  he  allude  to,  Kate,  when  he  talks  of  your 
having  spoken  angrily  to  him,  and  that  he  did  not  know 
you  ?  "  he  inquired,  after  a  few  moments'  pause,  returning  to 
her. 

"  Oh  dear ! — I  am  so  grieved  that  you  should  have  noticed 
it — but  since  you  ask  me  " — and  she  told  him  the  occurrence 
alluded  to  in  the  letter.  Mr.  Aubrey  drew  himself  up  un- 
consciously as  Kate  went  on,  and  she  perceived  him  beconv 


276  TEN  THOUSAND  A-YEAE. 

ing  still  paler  than  before,  and  felt  the  kindling  anger  of  his 
eye. 

"  Forget  it— forget  it,  dearest  Charles !— So  despicable  a 
being  is  really  not  worth  a  thought,"  said  Kate,  with  in- 
creasing anxiety  ;  for  she  had  never  in  her  life  before  wit- 
nessed her  brother  the  subject  of  such  powerful  emotions  as 
then  made  rigid  his  slender  frame.  At  length,  drawing  a 
long  breath— 

"It  is  fortunate,  Kate,"  said  he,  calmly,  "  that  he  is  not  a 

§entleman,  and  that  I  endeavor  to  be — a  Christian."  She 
ung  her  arms  round  him,  exclaiming,  "  There  spoke  my 
own  noble  brother !  " 

"  I  shall  preserve  this  letter  as  a  curiosity,  Kate,"  said  he 
presently :  and  with  a  pointed  significance  of  manner,  that 
arrested  his  sister's  attention,  ne  added,—"  It  is  rather 
singular,  but  some  time  before  you  came  in,  I  opened  a  letter 
in  which  your  name  is  mentioned— I  cannot  say  in  a  similar 
manner,  and  yet— in  short,  it  is  from  Lord  de  la  Zouch,  en- 
closing one " 

Miss  Aubrey  suddenly  blushed  scarlet,  and  trembled 
violently. 

"  Don  t  be  agitated,  my  dear  Kate,  the  enclosure  is  from 
Lady  de  la  Zouch  ;  and  if  it  be  in  the  same  strain  of  kindness 
that  pervades  Lord  de  la  Zouch's  letter  to  me— - 

"  I  would  rather  that  you  opened  and  read  it,  Charles  " — 
she  faltered,  sinking  into  a  chair. 

"Come,  come,  dear  Kate— play  the  woman!"  said  her 
brother,  with  an  affectionate  air,— "To  say  that  there  is 
nothing  in  these  letters  that  I  believe  will  interest  you— very 
deeply  gratify  and  interest  your  feelings — would  be- — 

"  I  know— 1— I— suspect— I " faltered  Miss  Aubrey  with 

much  agitation — "  I  shall  return." 

"  Then  you  shall  take  these  letters  with  you,  and  read,  or 
not  read  them,  as  you  like,"  said  her  brother,  putting  the 
letters  into  her  hand  with  a  fond  and  sorrowful  smile,  that 
soon,  however,  flitted  away— and,  leading  her  to  the  door, 
he  was  once  more  alone;  and,  after  a  brief  interval  of 
reverie,  he  wrote  answers  to  such  of  the  many  letters  before 
him  as  he  considered  earliest  to  require  them. 

Notwithstanding  the  judgment  and  tenderness  with  which 
Dr.  Tatham  discharged  the  very  serious  duty  which,  at  the 
entreaty  of  his  afflicted  friends  he  had  undertaken,  of  break- 
ing to  Mrs.  Aubrey  the  calamity  with  which  she  and  her 
family  were  menaced,  the  effects  of  the  disclosure  had  been 
most  disastrous.  They  had  paralyzed  her  ;  and,  Mr.  Aubrey 
who  had  long  been  a  waiting  the  issue,  in  sickening  suspense, 
in  an  adjoining  room,  was  hastily  summoned  in  to  behold  a 
mournful  and  heart-rending  spectacle.  His  venerable  moth- 
er—she who  had  given  him  life  at  the  mortal  peril  of  her  own ; 
she  whom  he  cherished  with  unutterable  tenderness  and 
reverence ;  she  who  doted  upon  him  as  upon  the  light  of  her 


TEN  THOUSAND  A-YEAR.  277 

eyes ;  from  whose  dear  lips  he  had  never  heard  a  word  of  Yin- 
kindness  or  severity  ;  whose  heart  had  never  known  an  im- 
pulse but  of  gentle,  noble,  unbounded  generosity  towards  all 
around  her— this  idolized  being  now  lay  suddenly  prostrated 
and  blighted  before  him 

Poor  Aubrey  yielded  to  this  long  and  violent  agony,  in 
the  presence  of  her  who  could  apparently  no  longer  hear,  or 
see,  or  be  sensible  of  what  was  passing  in  the  chamber. 

"  My  son,"  said  Dr.  Tatham,  after  the  first  burst  of  his 
friend's  grief  was  over,  and  he  knelt  down  beside  his  mother 
with  her  hand  grasped  in  his,  "  despise  not  the  chastening 
of  the  Lord  ;  neither  be  weary  of  His  correction  : 

"  For  whom  the  Lord  loveth  He  correcteth,  even  as  a  father 
the  son  in  whom  he  delighteth. 

"  The  Lord  will  not  cast  off  forever  ; 

"  But  though  he  cause  grief,  yet  will  he  have  compassion, 
according  to  the  multitude  of  his  mercies. 

"  For  he  doth  not  afflict  willingly,  nor  grieve  the  children 
of  men." 

It  was  with  great  difficulty  that  Dr.  Tatham  could  render 
himself  audible  while  murmuring  these  soothing  and  solemn 
passages  of  Scripture  in  the  ear  of  his  distracted  friend,  be- 
side whom  he  knelt. 

Mrs.  Aubrey  had  suffered  a  paralytic  seizure,  and  lay  motion- 
less and  insensible ;  her  features  slightly  disfigured,  but  par- 
tially concealed  beneath  her  long  silvery  gray  hair,  which, 
had,  in  the  suddenness  of  the  fit,  strayed  from  beneath  her 
cap. 

But  what  am  I  about  ?  "  at  length  exclaimed  Mr.  Aubrey, 

with  a  languid  and  alarmed  air — "has  medical  assistance 

?> 

"  Dr.  Goddart  and  Mr.  Whateley  are  both  sent  for  by  sev- 
eral servants,  and  will  doubtless  be  very  quickly  here,"  re- 
plied Dr.  Tatham  ;  and  while  he  yet  spoke,  Mr.  Whateley — 
who,  when  hastened  on  by  the  servant  who  had  been  sent 
for  him,  was  entering  the  park  on  a  visit  to  young  Mrs. 
Aubrey,  who  was  also  seriously  ill  and  in  peculiarly  critical 
circumstances— entered  the  room,  and  immediately  resorted 
to  the  necessary  measures.  Soon  afterwards,  also,  Dr.  God- 
i'dart  arrived  ;  but,  alas,  how  little  could  they  do  for  the  ven- 
erable sufferer ! 

During  the  next,  and  for  many  ensuing  days,  the  lodge 
was  assailed  by  very  many  anxious  and  sympathizing  in- 
quirers, who  were  answered  by  Waters,  whom  Mr.  Aubrey 
— oppressed  by  the  number  of  friends  who  hurried  up  to  the 
Hall,  and  insisted  upon  seeing  him  to  ascertain  the  extent  to 
which  the  dreadful  rumors  were  correct— had  stationed 
there  during  the  day  to  afford  the  requisite  information. 
The  Hall  was  pervaded  by  a  gloom  that  could  be  felt.  Every 
servant  had  a  woe-begone  look,  and  moved  about  as  if  a 
funeral  were  stirring.  Little  Charles  and  Agnes,  almost 


278  TEN  THOUSAND  A-YEAft. 

imprisoned  in  their  nursery,  seemed  quite  puzzled  and  eon* 
fused  at  the  strange  unusual  seriousness,  and  quietness,  and 
melancholy  faces  everywhere  about  them.  Kate  romped 
not  with  them  as  had  been  her  wont ;  but  would  constantly 
burst  into  tears  as  she  held  them  on  her  knee  or  in  her  arms, 
trying  to  evade  the  continual  questioning  of  Charles.  "  I 
think  it  will  be  time  for  me  to  cry  too  by-and-by !  "  said  he 
to  her  one  day,  with  an  air  halt  in  jest  and  half  in  earnest, 
that  made  poor  Kate's  tears  flow  afresh.  Sleepless  nights 
and  days  of  sorrow  soon  told  upon  her  appearance.  Her 
glorious  buoyancy  of  spirits,  that  erewhile,  as  it  were,  had 
tilled  the  whole  Hall  with  gladness  —  where  were  they 
now !  Ah,  me !  the  rich  bloom  had  disappeared  from  her 
beautiful  cheek ;  but  her  high  spirit,  though  oppressed,  was 
uot  broken,  and  she  stood  firmly  and  calmly  amid  the  scowl- 
ing skies  and  lowering  tempests.  You  fancied  you  saw  her 
auourn  tresses  stirred  upon  her  pale  but  calm  brow  by  the 
breath  of  the  approaching  storm ;  and  that  she  also  felt  it, 
but  trembled  not,  gazing  on  it  with  a  bright  and  steadfast 
eye.  Her  heart  might  be,  indeed,  bruised  and  shaken ;  but 
her  spirit  was,  ay,  unconquerable.  My  glorious  Kate,  how 
my  heart  goes  forth  towards  you  ! 

And  thou,  her  brother,  who  art  of  kindred  spirit ;  who  art 
supported  by  philosophy,  and  exalted  by  religion,  so  that 
thy  constancy  cannot  be  shaken  or  overthrown  by  the  black 
and  ominous  swell  of  trouble  which  is  increasing  and  closing 
around  thee,  I  know  that  thou  wilt  outlive  the  storm — and 
yet  it  rocks  thee ! 

A  month  or  two  may  see  thee  and  thine  expelled  from  Old 
Yattqn,  and  not  merely  having  lost  everything,  but  with  a 
liability  to  thy  successor  that  will  hang  round  thy  neck  like 
a  millstone.  What,  indeed,  is  to  become  of  you  all  ?  Whither 
will  you  go  ?  And  your  suffering  mother,  should  she  sur- 
vive so  long,  is  her  precious  form  to  be  borne  away  from 
Yatton  ? 

Around  thee  stand  those  who,  if  thou  fallest.  will  perish — • 
and  that  thou  knowest:  around  thy  calm,  sorrowful,  but 
erect  figure,  are  a  melancholy  group — thy  afflicted  mother — 
the  wife  of  thy  bosom— thy  two  little  children— thy  brave 
and  beautiful  sister— Yet  think  not,  Misfortune !  that  over 
this  man  thou  art  about  to  achieve  thy  accustomed  triumphs. 
Here,  behold  thou  hast  a  MAN  to  contend  with ;  nay,  more,  a 
CHRISTIAN  MAN,  who  hath  calmly  girded  up  his  loins  against 
the  coming  fight ! 

'Twas  Sabbath  evening,  some  five  weeks  or  so  after  the 
happening  of  the  mournful  events  above  commemorated, 
Kate,  having  spent,  as  usual,  several  hours  keeping  watch 
beside  the  silent  and  motionless  figure  of  her  mother,  had 
quitted  the  chamber  for  a  brief  interval,  thinking  to  relieve 
her  oppressed  spirits  by  walking,  for  a  little  while,  up  and 
down  the  long  gallery.  Having  slowly  paced  backwards  and. 


TEN  THOUSAND  A-TEAR.  279 

forwards  once  or  twice,  she  rested  against  the  little  oriel 
window  at  the  furthest  extremity  of  the  gallery  and  gazed, 
with  saddened  eye,  upon  the  setting  sun,  till  at  length,  in 
calm  grandeur,  it  disappeared  beneath  the  horizon.  'Twas 
to  Kate  a  solemn  and  mournful  sign ;  especially  followed  as 
it  was  by  the  deepening  shadows  and  gloom  of  evening.  She 
sighed  ;  and  with  her  hands  crossed  on  her  bosom,  gazed, 
with  a  tearful  eye,  into  the  darkening  sky,  where  glittered 
the  brilliant  evening  star.  Thus  she  remained,  a  thousand 
pensive  and  tender  thoughts  passing  through  her  mind,  till 
the  increasing  chills  of  evening  warned  her  to  retire.  "  I 
will  go,"  said  she  to  herself,  as  she  walked  slowly  along, 
"  and  try  to  play  the  evening  hymn — I  may  not  have  many 
more  opportunities  !  "  With  this  view  she  gently  opened  the 
drawing-room  door,  and,  glancing  around,  found  that  she 
should  be  alone.  The  fire  gave  the  only  light.  She  opened 
the  organ  with  a  sigh,  and  then  sat  down  before  it  some 
minutes  without  touching  the  keys.  At  length  she  struck 
them  very  gently,  as  if  fearful  of  disturbing  those  who,  she 
soon  recollected,  were  too  distant  to  hear  her.  Ah !  how  many 
associations  were  stirred  up  as  she  played  over  the  simple 
and  solemn  air !  At  length,  in  a  low  and  rather  tremulous 
voice,  she  begun— 

"Soon  will  the  evening  star,  with  silver  ray, 
Shed  its  mild  radiance  o'er  the  sacred  day; 
Resume  we,  then,  ere  night  and  silence  reign, 
The  rites  which  holiness  and  heaven  ordain " 

She  sang  the  last  line  somewhat  indistinctly ;  and,  over- 
come by  a  flood  of  tender  recollections,  ceased  playing ;  then, 
leaning  her  head  upon  her  hand,  she  shed  tears.  At  length 
she  resumed — 

"  Here  humbly  let  us  hope  our  Maker's  smile 
Will  crown  with  sweet  success  our  earthly  toil — 
And  here  on  each  returning  Sabbath  join " 

Here  poor  Kate's  voice  quivered — and,  after  one  or  twtr 
ineffectual  attempts  to  sing  the  next  line,  she  sobbed,  and 
ceased  playing.  She  remained  for  several  minutes,  her  face 
buried  in  her  handkerchief,  shedding  tears.  At  length,  "  1'U 
play  the  last  verse,"  thought  she,  "  and  then  sit  down  before 
the  fire,  and  read  over  the  evening  service  (feeling  for  oer 
little  prayer-book),  before  I  return  to  poor  mamma ! "  "With- 
a  firmer  hand  and  voice  she  proceeded — 

"  Father  of  Heaven !  in  whom  our  hopes  confide, 
Whose  power  defends  us.  and  whose  precepts  guide- 
In  life  our  guardian,  and  in  death  our  friend, 
Glory  supreme  be  thine,  till  time  shall  end!" 


280  TEN  THOUSAND  A-YEA1L 

She  played  and  sang  these  lines  with  a  kind  of  solemn  en. 
ergy ;  and  she  felt  as  if  a  ray  of  heavenly  light  had  trembled 
for  a  moment  upon  her  upturned  eye.  She  had  not  been,  as 
she  had  supposed,  alone ;  in  the  furthest  corner  of  the  room 
had  been  all  the  while  sitting  her  brother— too  exquisitely 
touched  by  the  simplicity  and  goodness  of  his  sweet  sister, 
to  apprize  her  of  his  presence.  Several  times  his  feelings 
had  nearly  overpowered  him ;  and  as  she  concluded,  he  arose 
from  his  chair,  and  approaching  her,  after  her  first  surprise 
was  over, — "  Heaven  bless  you,  dear  Kate  !  "  said  he,  taking 
her  hands  in  his  own.  Neither  of  them  spoke  for  a  few  mo- 
ments. 

"  I  could  not  have  sung  a  line,  or  played,  if  I  had  known 
that  you  were  here,"  said  she. 

"  I  thought  so,  Kate." 

,"  I  don't  think  I  shall  ever  have  the  heart  to  play  again  !  " 
— They  were  both  silent. 

"  Be  assured,  Kate,  that  submission  to  the  will  of  God," 
said  Mr.  Aubrey,  as  (he  with  his  arm  round  his  sister)  they 
walked  slowly  to  and  fro,  "  is  the  great  lesson  to  be  learned 
from  the  troubles  of  life ;  and  for  that  purpose  they  are  sent. 
Let  us  bear  up  a  while ;  the  waters  will  not  go  over  our 
heads ! " 

"  I  hope  not,"  replied  his  sister,  faintly,  and  in  tears 

"  How  did  you  leave  Agnes,  Charles  ?  " 

*'  She  was  asleep ;  she  is  still  very  feeble —  Here  the 
door  was  suddenly  opened,  and  Miss  Aubrey's  maid  entered 
hastily,  exclaiming,  "  Are  you  here,  ma'am  ? — or  sir  ?  " 

"  Here  we  are,  they  replied,  hurrying  towards  her ; 
"  what  is  the  matter  ?  " 

"  Oh,  madam  is  talking  !  She  began  speaking  all  of  a  sud- 
den. She  did,  indeed,  sir.  She's  talking,  and "  continued 

the  girl,  almost  breathless. 

"My  mother  talking !  "  exclaimed  Aubrey,  with  an  amazed 
air. 

"  Oh  yes,  sir !  she  is — she  is  indeed !  " 

Miss  Aubrey  sank  into  her  brother's  arms,  overcome  for  a 
moment  with  the  sudden  and  surprising  intelligence. 

"Rouse  yourself,  Kate!"  he  exclaimed  with  animation; 
*'  did  I  not  tell  you  that  Heaven  would  not  forget  us  ?  But  I 
must  hasten  up-stairs,  to  hear  the  joyful  sounds  with  my 
own  ears — and  do  you  follow  as  soon  as  you  can."  Leaving 
her  in  the  care  of  her  maid,  he  hastened  out  of  the  room  up- 
stairs, and  was  soon  at  the  door  of  his  mother's  chamber. 
He  stood  for  a  moment  in  the  doorway,  and  his  straining 
ears  caught  the  gentle  tones  of  his  mother's  voice,  speaking 
in  a  low  but  cheerful  tone.  His  knees  trembled  beneath  him 
with  joyful  excitement.  Fearful  of  trusting  himself  in  her 
presence  till  he  had  become  calmer,  he  noiselessly  sank  on 
the  nearest  chair,  with  beating  heart  and  straining  ear— ay, 
every  tone  of  that  dear  voice  thrilled  through  his  heart. 


TEN  THOUSAND  A-YEAh.  281 

But  I  shall  not  torture  my  own  or  my  reader's  heart  by 
dwelling  upon  the  scene  that  ensued.  Alas !  the  venerable 
sufferer's  tongue  was  indeed  loosed ;— but  reason  had  fled ! 
He  listened— he  distinguished  her  words.  She  supposed 
that  all  her  children— dead  and  alive — were  romping  about 
her ;  she  spoke  of  him  and  his  sister  as  she  had  spoken  to 
them  twenty  years  ago. 

As  soon  as  he  had  made  this  sad  discovery,  overwhelmed 
with  grief  he  staggered  out  of  the  room  j  and  motioning  his 
sister,  who  was  entering,  into  an  adjoining  apartment,  com- 
municated to  her,  with  great  agitation,  the  woful  condition 
of  their  mother. 


CHAPTER  XII. 

THE  chief  corner-stone  suddenly  found  wanting  in  the 
glittering  fabric  of  Mr.  Titmouse  s  fortune,  so  that  to  the 
eyes  of  its  startled  architects,  Messrs.  Quirk,  Gammon  and 
Snap,  it  seemed  momentarily  threatening  to  tumble  about 
their  ears,  was  a  certain  piece  of  evidence  which,  being  a 
matter-of-fact  man,  I  should  like  to  explain  to  the  reader  be- 
fore we  get  on  any  further.  In  order,  however,  to  do  this 
effectually,  I  must  go  back  to  an  earlier  period  in  the  history 
than  has  been  yet  called  to  his  attention.  If  it  shall  have 
been  unfortunate  enough  to  attract  the  hasty  eye  of  the 
superficial  and  impatient  ?ioye^-reader,  I  make  no  doubt  that 
by  such  a  one  certain  portions  of  what  has  gone  before,  and 
which  could  not  fail  of  attracting  the  attention  of  long- 
headed people,  as  being  not  thrown  in  for  nothing  (and 
therefore  to  be  borne  in  mind  with  a  view  to  subsequent  ex- 
planation), have  been  entirely  overlooked  or  forgotten. 
Now,  I  can  fancy  that  the  sort  of  reader  whom  I  have  in  my 
eye,  as  one  whose  curiosity  it  is  worth  some  pains  to  excite 
and  sustain,  has  more  than  once  asked  himself  the  following 
question,  viz. — 

How  did  Messrs.  Quirk,  Gammon,  and  Snap  first  come  to 
be  acquainted  with  the  precarious  tenure  by  which  Mr. 
Aubrey  held  the  Yatton  property  ?  Why,  it  chanced  hi  this 
wise : 

Mr.  Parkinson  of  Grilston,  who  has  been  already  intro- 
duced to  the  reader,  succeeded  to  his  late  father  in  one  of 
the  most  respectable  practices,  as  a  country  attorney  and 
solicitor  in  1  orkshire.  He  was  a  highly  honorable,  pains- 
taking man,  and  deservedly  enjoyed  the  entire  confidence  of 
all  his  numerous  and  influential  clients.  Some  twelve  years 
before  the  period  at  which  this  history  commences,  Mr. 
Parkinson,  who  was  a  very  kind-hearted  man,  had  taken  in- 
to his  service  an  orphan  boy  of  the  name  of  Steggars,  at  first 


282  TEN  THOUSAND  A-YEAB. 

merely  as  a  sort  of  errand-boy,  and  to  look  after  the  office. 
He  soon,  however,  displayed  so  much  sharpness,  and  ac- 
quitted himself  so  creditably  in  anything  that  he  happened 
to  be  concerned  in,  a  little  above  the  run  of  his  ordinary 
duties,  that  in  the  course  of  a  year  or  two  he  became  a  sort 
of  clerk,  and  sat  and  wrote  at  the  desk  it  had  formerly  been 
his  sole  province  to  dust.  Higher  and  higher  did  he  rise,  in 
process  of  time,  in  his  master's  estimation ;  and  at  length 
became  quite  a  factotum— as  such,  acquainted  with  the 
whole  course  of  business  that  passed  through  the  office. 
Many  interesting  matters  connected  with  the  circumstances 
and  connections  of  the  neighboring  nobility  and  gentry 
were  thus  constantly  brought  under  his  notice,  and  now  and 
then  set  him  thinking  whether  the  knowledge  thus  acquired 
could  not,  in  some  way,  and  at  some  time  or  another,  be 
turned  to  his  own  advantage  ;  for  I  am  sorry  to  say  that  he 
was  utterly  unworthy  of  the  kindness  and  confidence  of  Mr. 
Parkinson,  who  little  thought  that  in  Steggars  he  had  to 
deal  with — a  rogue  in  grain.  Such  being  his  character,  and 
such  his  opportunities,  this  Avorthy  made  a  practice  of  min- 
uting down,  from  time  to  time,  anything  of  interest  or  im- 
portance in  the  affairs  which  thus  came  under  his  notice — 
even  laboriously  copying  long  documents,  when  he  thought 
them  of  importance  enough  for  his  purpose,  and  had  the  op- 
portunity of  doing  so  without  attracting  the  attention  of 
Mr.  Parkinson.  He  thus  silently  acquired  a  mass  of  infor- 
mation which  might  have  enabled  him  to  occasion  great  an- 
noy ance?  and  even  inflict  serious  injury ;  and  the  precise  ob- 
ject he  had  in  view,  was  either  to  force  himself,  hereafter, 
into  partnership  with  his  employer  (provided  he  could  get 
regularly  introduced  into  the  profession),  or  even  compel  his 
master's  clients  to  receive  him  into  their  confidence,  ad- 
versely to  Mr.  Parkinson,  making  it  worth  his  while  to  keep 
the  secrets  of  which  he  had  become  possessed.  So  careful 
ought  to  be,  and  indeed  generally  are,  attorneys  and  solici- 
tors, as  to  the  characters  of  those  whom  they  thus  receive 
into  their  employ.  On  the  occasion  of  Mr.  Aubrey's  intend- 
ed marriage  with  Miss  St.  Clair,  with  a  view  to  the  very 
liberal  settlements  which  he  contemplated,  a  full  abstract  of 
his  title  was  laid  by  Mr.  Parkinson  before  his  conveyancer, 
in  order  to  advise  and  prepare  the  necessary  instruments. 
Owing  to  inquiries  suggested  by  the  conveyancer,  additional 
statements  were  laid  before  him  ;  and  produced  an  opinion 
of  a  somewhat  unsatisfactory  description,  from  which  I  shall 
lay  before  the  reader  the  following  paragraph : — 

"  There  seems  no  reason  for  supposing  that  any  descend- 
ant of  Stephen  Dreddlington  is  now  in  existence  :  still,  as  it 
is  by  no  means  physically  impossible  that  such  a  person  may 
be  in  esse^  it  would  unquestionably  be  most  important  tor 
the  security  of  Mr.  Aubrey's  title,  to  establish  clearly  the 
validity  of  the  conveyance  by  way  of  mortgage,  executed  by 


TEN  THOUSAND  A-YEAR.  283 

Harry  Dreddlington,  and  which  was  afterwards  assigned  to 
Geoffry  Dreddlington  on  his  paying  off  the  money  borrowed 
by  his  deceased  uncle :  since  the  descent  of  Mr.  Aubrey  from 
Geoffry  Dreddlington  would,  in  that  event,  clothe  him  with  an 
indefeasible  title  at  law,  by  virtue  of  that  deed ;  and  any 
equitable  rights  which  were  originally  outstanding,  would 
be  barred  by  lapse  of  time.  But  the  difficulty  occurring  to 
my  mind  on  this  part  of  the  case  is,  that  unless  Harry  Dred- 
dlington, who  executed  that  deed  of  mortgage,  survived  his 
father,  (a  point  on  which  I  am  surprised  that  I  am  furnished 
Avith  no  information,)  the  deed  itself  would  have  been  mere 
\vaste  parchment,  as  in  reality  the  conveyance  of  a  person 
who  never  had  any  interest  in  the  Yatton  property — and,  of 
course,  neither  Geoffry  Dreddlington,  nor  his  descendant 
Mr.  Aubrey,  could  derive  any  rignt  whatever  under  such 
an  instrument.  In  that  case,  such  a  contingency  as  I  have 
above  hinted  at—I  mean  the  existence  of  any  legitimate 
descendant  of  Stephen  Dreddlington — might  have  a  most 
serious  effect  upon  the  rights  ofJfr.  Aubrey." 

Now  every  line  of  this  opinion,  and  also  even  of  the  Ab- 
stract of  Title  upon  which  it  was  written,  did  this  quick- 
sighted  young  scoundrel  copy  out  and  deposit,  as  a  great  prize, 
in  his  desk,  among  other  similar  notes  and  memoranda,  little 
wotting  his  master  the  while  of  what  he  was  doing.  Some 
year  or  two  afterwards,  the  relationship  subsisting  be- 
tween Mr.  Parkinson  and  his  clerk  Steggars,  -\yas  suddenly 
determined  by  a  somewhat  untoward  event ;  viz.  by  the  lat- 
ter s  decamping  with  the  sum  of  £700  sterling,  being  the 
amount  of  money  due  on  a  mortgage  which  he  had  been 
sent  to  receive  from  a  client  of  Mr.  Parkinson's.  Steggars 
fled  for  it— but  first  having  bethought  himself  of  the  docu- 
ments to  which  I  have  been  alluding,  and  which  he  carried 
with  him  to  London.  Hot  pursuit  was  made  after  the  unfort- 
unate delinquent,  who  was  taken  into  custody  two  or  three 
days  after  his  arrival  in  town,  while  he  was  walking  about 
the  streets,  with  the  whole  of  the  sum  which  he  had  embez- 
zled, minus  a  few  pounds,  upon  his  person,  in  bank-notes. 
He  quickly  found  his  way  into  Newgate.  His  natural  sagac- 
ity assured  him  that  his  case  was  rather  an  ugly  one ;  but 
hope  did  not  desert  him. 

•:  Well,  my  kiddy,"  said  Grasp,  the  grim-visaged,  gray- 
headed  turnkey,  as  soon  as  he  had  ushered  Steggars  into  his 
snug  little  quarters  ;  "  here  you  are,  you  see — isn't  you  ?  " 

"  I  think  I  am,"  replied  Steggars,  with  a  sigh. 

"  Well— and  if  you  want  to  have  a  chance  of  not  going 
across  the  water  till  you're  a  many  years  older,  you'll  get 
yourself  defended,  and  the  sooner  the  b'etter,  d'ye  see.  There's 
Quirk.  Gammon  and  Snap — my  eyes !  how  they  do  thin  this 
here  place  of  ours,  to  be  sure  !  The  only  thing's  to  get  'em 
soon ;  'cause,  ye  see,  they're  so  run  after.  Shall  I  send  them 
to  you?" 


284  TEN  THOUSAND  A-YEAE. 

Steggars  answered  eagerly  in  the  affirmative.  In  order  to 
account  for  this  spontaneous  good-nature  on  the  part  of  Grasp, 
I  must  explain  that  old  Mr.  Quirk  had  for  years  secured  a 
large  criminal  practice,  by  having  in  his  interest  most  of  the 
officers  attached  to  the  police-offices  and  Newgate,  to  whom 
he  gave,  in  fact,  systematic  gratuities,  in  order  to  get  their 
recommendations  to  the  persecuted  individuals  who  came 
Jinto  their  power.  Very  shortly  after  Grasp's  messenger  had 
reached  Saffron  Hill,  with  the  intelligence  that  "  there  was 
something  now  in  the  trap"  old  Quirk  bustled  down  to  New- 
gate, and  was  introduced  to  Steggars,  with  whom  he  was 
closeted  for  some  time.  He  took  a  lively  interest  in  his  new 
companion,  whose  narrative  of  his  flight  and  capture  he 
listened  to  in  a  very  kind  and  sympathizing  way,  and  prom- 
ised to  do  for  him  whatever  his  little  skill  and  experience 
could  do.  He  hinted,  however,  that,  as  Mr.  Steggars  must 
be  aware,  a  little  ready  money  would  be  required,  in  order  to 
fee  counsel — whereat  Steggars  looked  very  dismal  indeed, 
and,  knowing  the  state  of  his  exchequer,  imagined  himself 
already  on  shipboard,  on  his  way  to  Botany  Bay.  Old  Mr. 
Quirk  asked  him  if  he  had  no  friends  who  would  raise  a 
trifle  for  a  "  chum  in  trouble," — and  on  answering  in  the 
negative,  he  observed  the  enthusiasm  of  the  respectable  old 
gentleman  visibly  and  rapidly  cooling  down. 

"  But  I'll  tell  you  what,  sir,"  said  poor  Steggars,  suddenly, 
"  if  I  haven't  money,  I  may  have  money's  worth  at  my  com- 
mand ;— I've  a  little  .box,  that's  at  my  lodging,  which  those 
that  got  me  knew  nothing  of— and  in  which  there  is  a  trifle 
or  two  about  the  families  and  fortunes  of  some  of  the  first 
folk  in  Yatton,  that  would  be  precious  well  worth  looking 
after,  to  those  that  know  how  to  follow  up  such  matters." 

Old  Quirk  hereat  pricked  up  his  ears,  and  asked  his  young 
friend  how  he  got  possessed  of  such  secrets. 

"  Oh  fie !  fie !  "  said  he  gently,  as  soon  as  Steggars  had  told 
him  the  practices  of  which  I  have  already  put  the  reader  in 
possession. 

"  Ah— you  may  say  fie !  fie !  if  you  like,"  quoth  Steggars 
( earnestly ;  "  but  the  thing  is,  not  how  they  were  come  by, 
1  but  what  can  be  done  with  them,  now  they're  got.  For  ex- 
ample, there's  a  certain  member  of  parliament  in  Yorkshire 
that,  high  as  he  may  hold  his  head,  nas  no  more  right  to  the 
estates  that  yield  him  a  good  ten  thousand  a-year  than  I 
have,  but  keeps  some  folk  out  of  their  own  that  could 
pay  some  other  folk  around  sum  to  be  put  in  the  way 
of  getting  their  own ; "  and  that  was  only  one  of  the  good 
things  he  knew  of.  Here  old  Quirk  rubbed  his  chin,  hemmed, 
fidgetted  about  in  his  seat,  took  off  his  glasses,  wiped  them, 
replaced  them  ;  and  presently  went  through  that  ceremony 
again.  He  then  said  that  he  had  the  honor  of  being  concern- 
ed for  a  great  number  of  gentlemen  in  Mr.  Steggars'  "  pres» 


TEN  THOUSAND  A-YEAR.  285 

ent  embarrassed  circumstances,"  but  who  had  always  been 
able  to  command  at  least  a  five-pound  note,  at  starting,  to 
run  a  heat  for  liberty. 

"  Come,  come,  old  gentleman,"  quoth  Steggars  earnestly, 
"  I  don't  want  to  go  over  the  water  before  my  time,  if  I  can 
help  it,  I  assure  you ;  and  I  see  you  know  the  value  of  what 
I've  got !  Such  a  gentleman  as  you  can  turn  every  bit  of 
paper  I  have  in  my  box  into  a  fifty-pound  note." 

All  this  is  moonshine,  my  young  friend,"  said  old  Quirk 
in  an  irresolute  tone  and  manner. 

"  Ah !  is  it,  though  ?  To  be  able  to  tell  the  owner  of  a  fat 
ten  thousand  a-year,  that  you  can  spring  a  mine  under  his 
feet  at  any  moment — eh  ? — and  no  one  ever  know  how  you 
came  by  your  knowledge.  And  if  they  wouldn't  do  what 
was  handsome,  couldn't  you  get  the  right  hew — and  wouldn't 
that— Lord!  it  would  make  the  fortunes  of  half-a-dozen  of  the 
first  houses  in  the  profession ! "  Old  Quirk  got  a  little  excited. 

"  But  mind,  sir— you  see  "—said  Steggars,  "  if  I  get  off, 
I'm  not  to  be  cut  out  of  the  thing  altogether — eh?  I  shall 
look  to  be  taken  into  your  employ,  and  dealt  handsomely 
by— 

"  Oh  Lord ! "  exclaimed  Quirk  involuntarily  —  adding 
quickly,  "  Yes,  yes !  to  be  sure !  only  fair  :  but  let  us  first  get 
you  out  of  your  present  difficulty,  you  know !  "  Steggars, 
having  first  exacted  from  him  a  written  promise  to  use  his 
utmost  exertions  on  his  (Steggars')  behalf,  and  secure  him 
the  services  of  two  of  the  most  eminent  Old  Bailey  counsel- 
viz.  Mr.  Bluster  and  Mr.  Slang— gave  Mr.  Quirk  the  number 
of  the  house  where  his  precious  box  was,  and  a  written  order 
to  the  landlord  to  deliver  it  up  to  the  bearer ;  after  which 
Mr.  Quirk  shook  him  cordially  by  the  hand,  and  having 
quitted  the  prison,  made  his  way  straight  to  the  house  in 
question,  and  succeeded  in  obtaining  what  he  asked  for.  He 
faithfully  performed  his  agreement  with  Steggars ;  for  he 
retained  both  Bluster  and  Slang  for  him,  and  got  up  their 
briefs  with  care :  but,  alas !  although  these  eminent  men 
exerted  all  their  great  powers,  they  succeeded  not  in  either 
bothering  the  judge,  bamboozling  the  jury,  or  browbeating 
the  witnesses,  (the  principal  one  of  whom  was  Mr.  Parkin- 
son ;)  Steggars  was  found  guilty,  and  sentenced  to  be  tran- 
sported for  life.  Enraged  at  this  issue,  he  sent  a  message 
the  next  day  to  Mr.  Quirk  requesting  a  visit  from  him. 
When  he  arrived,  Steggars,  in  a  very  violent  tone,  demanded 
that  his  papers  should  be  returned  to  him.  'Twas  in  vain 
that  Mr.  Quirk  explained  to  him  again  and  again  his  in- 
teresting position  with  reference  to  his  goods,  chattels,  and 
effects— i.  e.  that,  as  a  convicted  felon,  he  had  no  further 
concern  with  them,  and  might  dismiss  all  anxiety  on  that 
score  from  his  mind.  Steggars  hereat  got  more  furious  than 
before,  and  intimated  plainly  the  course  he  should  feel  it  his 


286  TEN  THOUSAND  A-YEAB. 

duty  to  pursue— that,  if  the  papers  in  question  were  not 
given  up  to  him  as  he  desired,  he  should  at  once  write  off  to 
his  late  employer,  Mr.  Parkinson,  and  acknowledge  how 
much  further  he  (Steggars)  had  wronged  him  and  his  clients 
than  he  supposed  of.  Old  Quirk  very  feelingly  represented 
to  him  that  he  was  at  liberty  to  do  anything  that  he  thought 
calculated  to  relieve  his  excited  feelings  :  and  then  Mr. 
Quirk  took  a  final  farewell  of  his  client,  wishing  him  health 
and  happiness. 

"  I  say,  Grasp  !  "  said  he,  in  a  whisper,  to  that  grim  func- 
tionary, as  soon  as  he  had  secured  poor  Steggars  in  his  cell, 
"  that  bird  is  a  little  ruffled  just  now — isn't  he,  think  you  ?  " 

"Lud.  sir,  the  nat'ralist  thing  in  the  world,  consider- 
ing  '* 

"  Well— if  he  should  want  a  letter  taken  to  any  one,  what- 
ever he  may  say  to  the  contrary,  you'll  send  it  on  to  Saffron 
Hill— eh?  Understand?— He  may  be  injuring  himself,  you 
know ;"  and  old  Quirk  with  one  hand  clasped  the  huge  arm 
of  Grasp  in  a  familiar  way,  and  with  the  forefinger  of  the 
other  touched  his  own  nose,  and  then  winked  his  eye. 

"  All  right ! "  quoth  Grasp,  and  they  parted.  Within  a 
very  few  hours'  time,  Mr.  Quirk  received,  by  the  hand  of  a 
trusty  messenger,  from  Grasp,  a  letter  written  by  Steggars 
to  Mr.  Parkinson  ;  a  long  and  eloquent  letter  to  the  purport 
and  effect  which  Steggars  had  intimated.  Mr.  Quirk  read  it 
with  much  satisfaction,  for  it  disclosed  a  truly  penitent  feel- 
ing, and  a  desire  to  undo  as  much  mischief  as  the  writer  had 
done.  He  (Mr.  Quirk)  was  not  in  the  least  exasperated  by 
certain  very  plain  terms  in  which  his  own  name  was  men- 
tioned ;  but,  making  all  due  allowances,  quietly  put  the  letter 
in  the  fire  as  soon  as  he  had  read  it.  In  due  time  Mr.  Steg- 
gars, whose  health  had  suffered  from  close  confinement, 
caught  frequent  whiffs  of  the  fresh  sea-breeze,  having  set 
out,  under  most  favorable  auspices,  for  Botany  Bay ;  to 
which  distant  but  happy  place,  he  had  been  thus  fortunate 
in  securing,  so  early,  an  appointment  for  life. 

Such,  then,  were  the  miserable  means  by  which  Mr.  Quirk 
became  acquainted  with  the  exact  state  of  Mr.  Aubrey's 
title ;  on  first  becoming  apprised  of  which,  Mr.  Gammon 
either  felt,  or  affected,  great  repugnance  to  taking  any  part 
in  the  affair.  He  appeared  to  suffer  himself,  at  length,  how- 
ever, to  be  over-persuaded  by  Quirk  into  acquiescence ;  and, 
that  point  gained — having  ends  in  view  of  which  Mr.  Quirk 
had  not  the  least  conception,  and  which,  in  fact,  had  but  sud- 
denly occurred  to  Mr.  Gammon  himself  —  worked  his 
materials  with  a  caution,  skill,  energy,  and  perseverance, 
which  soon  led  to  important  results.  Guided  by  the  sug- 
gestions of  acute  and  experienced  counsel,  after  much  pains 
and  considerable  expense,  they  succeeded  in  discovering 
that  precious  specimen  of  humanity.  Tittlebat  Titmouse. 


TEN  THOUSAND  A-TEAB.  287 

who  hath  already  figured  so  prominently  in  this  history. 
When  they  came  to  set  down  on  paper  the  result  of  all  their 
researches  and  inquiries,  in  order  to  submit  it  in  the  shape 
of  a  case  for  the  opinion  of  Mr.  Mortmain  and  Mr.  Frank- 
pledge,  in  the  manner  which  has  been  already  described,  it 
looked  perfect  on  paper,  as  many  a  faulty  pedigree  and 
abstract  of  title  had  looked  before,  and  will  yet  look.  It  was 
quite  possible  for  even  Mr.  Tresayle  himself  to  overlook  the 
defect  which  had  been  pointed  "but  by  Mr.  Subtle.  That 
which  is  stated  to  a  conveyancer  as  a  fact — any  particular 
event,  for  instance,  as  of  a  death,  a  birth,  or  a  marriage,  at 
a  particular  time,  which  the  very  nature  of  the  case  renders 
highly  probable— he  may  easily  assume  to  be  so.  But  when 
the  same  statement  comes  under  the  acute  and  experienced 
eye  of  a  nisi  prius  lawyer,  who  knows  that  he  will  have  to 
prove  his  case,  step  by  step,  the  aspect  of  things  is  soon 
changed.  "De  non  apparentibus.  et  de  non  existentibus" 
saith  Lord  Coke, "  eadem  est  ratio."  The  first  practitioner  at 
the  common  law  before  whom  the  case  came,  in  its  roughest 
and  earliest  form,  in  order  that  he  might  "lick  it  into 
shape,"  and  "  advise  generally,"  preparatory  to  its  "  being 
laid  before  counsel,"  was  Mr.  Traverse,  a  young  pleader, 
whom  Messrs.  Quirk  and  Gammon  were  disposed  to  take  by 
the  hand.  He  wrote  a  very  showy,  but  superficial  and 
delusive  opinion  ;  and  put  the  intended  protege  of  his  clients, 
as  it  were  by  a  kind  of  hop,  step,  and  jump,  into  possession 
of  the  Yatton  estates.  Quirk  was  quite  delighted  on  read- 
ing it ;  but  Gammon  shook  his  head  with  a  somewhat  sar- 
castic smile,  and  said  he  would  at  once  prepare  a  case  for  the 
opinion  of  Mr.  Lynx,  whom  he  had  pitched  upon  as  the 
junior  counsel  in  any  proceedings  which  might  be  instituted 
in  a  court  of  law.  Lynx  (of  whom  I  shall  speak  hereafter) 
was  an  experienced,  hard-headed,  vigilant,  and  accurate 
lawyer ;  the  very  man  for  such  a  case,  requiring,  as  it  did. 
most  patient  and  minute  examination.  With  an  eye  fitted 

"  To  inspect  a  mite,  not  comprehend  the  heaven," 

he  crawled,  as  it  were,  over  a  case  ;  and  thus,  like  as  one  can 
imagine  that  a  beetle  creeping  over  the  floor  of  Sf;.  Paul's 
would  detect  minute  flaws  and  fissures  that  would  be  in- 
visible to  the  eye  of  Sir  Christopher  Wren  himself,  spied 
oat  defects  that  much  nobler  optics  would  have  overlooked. 
To  come  to  plain  matter-of-fact,  however,  I  have  beside  me 
the  original  opinion  written  by  Mr.  Lynx ;  and  shall  treat 
the  reader  to  a  taste  of  it— giving  him  sufficient  to  enable 
him  to  appreciate  the  ticklish  position  of  affairs  with  Mr. 
Titmouse.  To  make  it  not  altogether  unintelligible,  let  us 
suppose  the  state  of  the  pedigree  to  be  something  like  this 
(as  far  a§  concerns  our  present  purpose) ;— 


288  TEN  THOUSAND  A-YEAR. 

(DREDDLINGTON.) 


(Harry  D.) 


(Charles  D.) 


(Stephen  D.) 


(A  female  descendant 
marries  Gabriel  Tittlebat 
Titmouse,  through  whom 

TITTLEBAT  TITMOUSE 
claims.) 


(GeoffryD.) 


(A  female  descendant 
marries  CHARLES  AUBREY, 
Esq.,  father  of  the  pres- 
ent possessor.) 


Be  pleased  now.  unlearned  reader,  to  bear  in  mind  that 
*'  Dreddlington"  at  the  top  of  the  above  table  is  the  common 
ancestor ;  having  two  sons,  the  elder  "Harry  D."  the  young- 
er "  Charles  D- ;  which  latter  has,  in  like  manner,  two  sons, 
"Stephen  Z>."  the  elder  son,  and  "  Geoffry  I)."  the  younger 
son ;  that  Mr.  Aubrey,  at  present  in  possession,  claims  under 
"  Geoffry  D"  Now  it  will  be  incumbent  on  Titmouse,  in 
the  first  instance,  to  establish  in  himself  a  clear  independent 
title  to  the  estates ;  it  being  sufficient  for  Mr.  Aubrey,  (pos- 
session being  nine-tenths  of  the  law,)  to  falsify  Titmouse's 
proofs,  or  show  them  defective  —  "  because,"  saith  a  very 
learned  serjeant  who  hath  writ  a  textbook  upon  the  Action 
of  Ejectment,  "the  plaintiff  in  an  act  of  ejectment  must  re- 
cover upon  the  strength  of  his  own  title,  not  the  weakness 
of  his  adversary's." 

"  Now  things  standing  thus,  behold  the  astute  Lynx  ad- 
vising (inter  alia}  in  manner  following ;  that  is  to  say — 

"It  appears  clear  that  the  lessor  of  the  plaintiff  (i.  e.  Tittle- 
bat Titmouse)  will  be  able  to  prove  that  Dreddlington  (the 
common  ancestor)  was  seized  of  the  estate  at  Yatton  in  the 
year  1740;  that  he  had  two  sons,  Harry  and  Charles,  the  for- 
mer of  whom,  after  a  life  of  dissipation,  appears  to  have  died 
without  issue ;  and  that  from  the  latter  (Charles)  are  de- 
scended Stephen,  the  ancestor  of  the  lessor  of  the  plaintiff, 
and  Geoffry  the  ancestor  of  the  defendant.  Assuming,  there- 
fore, that  the  descent  of  the  lessor  of  the  plaintiff  from  Ste- 
phen can  be  made  out,  as  there  appears  every  reason  to  ex- 
pect, [on  this  point  Lynx  had  written  four  brief  pages,]  a 
clear  prima  facie  case  will  be  established  on  the  part  of  the 
lessor  of  the  plaintiff,  As,  however,  it  is  suspected  that 


TEN  THOUSAND  A-YEAR.  289 

Harry  D.  executed  a  conveyance  in  fee  of  the  property,  in 
order  to  secure  the  loan  contracted  by  him  from  Aiiron  Moses, 
it  will  be  extremely  important  to  ascertain,  and,  if  possible, 
procure  satisfactory  evidence,  that  his  decease  occurred  be- 
fore the  period  at  which,  by  his  father's  death,  that  convey- 
ance could  have  become  operative  upon  the  property: 
since  it  is  obvious  that,  should  he  have  survived  his 
father,  that  instrument,  being  outstanding,  may  form  a 
complete  answer  to  the  case  of  the  lessor  of  the  plain- 
tiff. The  danger  will  be  obviously  increased,  should 
the  debt  to  Aaron  Moses  prove  to  have  been  paid  off,  as  is 
stated  to  be  rumored,  by  Geoffry  D.,  the  younger  son  of 
Charles  D. :  for,  should  that  turn  out  to  be  the  case,  he  would 
probably  have  taken  a  conveyance  to  himself,  or  to  trustees 
for  his  benefit,  from  Aaron  Moses— which  being  in  the  power 
of  the  defendant,  Mr.  Aubrey,  would  enable  him  to  make  out 
a  title  to  the  property,  parainount  to  that  now  attempted  to 
be  set  up  on  behalf  of  Mr.  Titmouse.  Every  possible  exertion, 
therefore,  should  be  made  to  ascertain  the  precise  period  of 
the  death  of  Harry  D.  The  registries  of  the  various  parishes 
in  which  the  family  may  have  at  any  time  resided,  should 
be  carefully  searched ;  and  an  examination  made  in  the 
churches  and  churchyards,  of  all  tombstones,  escutcheons, 
etc.,  belonging,  or  supposed  to  belong,  to  the  Dreddlington 
family,  and  by  which  any  light  can  be  thrown  upon  this  most 
important  point.  It  appears  clear  that  Dreddlington  (the  com- 
mon ancestor)  died  on  the  7th  August,  1742  : — the  question, 
therefore,  simply  is,  whether  the  death  of  his  eldest  son  (Harry) 
took  place  prior  or  subsequent  to  that  period.  It  is  to  be 
feared  that  the  defendant  may  be  in  possession  of  some  bet- 
ter evidence  on  this  point  than  is  possessed  by  the  lessor  of 
the  plaintiff.  The  natural  presumption  certainly  seems  to 
be,  that  the  son,  being  the  younger  and  stronger  man,  was 
the  survivor." 

The  above  mentioned  opinion  of  Mr.  Lynx,  together  with 
that  of  Mr.  Subtle  entirely  corroborating  it,  (and  which  was 
alluded  to  in  a  late  chapter  of  this  history,)  and  a  pedigree, 
were  lying  on  the  table,  one  day,  at  the  office  at  Saffron 
Hill,  before  the  anxious  and  perplexed  parties,  Messrs.  Quirk 
and  Gammon. 

Gammon  was  looking  attentively,  and  with  a  very  cha- 
grined air,  at  the  pedigree ;  and  Quirk  was  looking  at  Gam- 
mon. 

"  Now,  Gammon,"  said  the  former,  "  just  let  me  see  again 
where  the  exact  hitch  is— eh  ?  You'll  think  me  perhaps  in- 
fernally stupid,  but— curse  me  if  I  can  see  it ! " 

"  See  it,  my  dear  sir?  Here,  here!'1''  replied  Gammon  with 
sudden  impatience,  putting  his  finger  two  or  three  times  to 
the  words  '"''Harry  J)" 

"  Lord  bless  us !   Don't  be  so  sharp  with  one,  Gammon !   I 


290  TEN  THOUSAND  A-YEAR. 

know  as  well  as  you  that  that's  about  where  the  crack  is ; 
but  what  is  the  precise  thing  we're  in  want  of,  eh  ?  " 

"  Proof,  my  dear  sir,  of  the  death  of  Harry  Dreddlington 
some  time— no  matter  when— previous  to  the  7th  August, 
1742 ;  and  in  default  thereof,  Mr.  Quirk,  we  are  all  flat  on 
our  backs,  and  had  better  never  have  stirred  in  the  business." 

"  You  know,  Gammon,  you're  better  up  in  these  matters 
than  I— (only  because  I've  not  been  able  to  turn  my  attention 
to  'em  since  I  first  began  business) — so  just  tell  me,  in  a  word, 
what  good's  to  be  got  by  showing  that  fellow  to  have  died  in 
his  father's  lifetime  ?  n 

"  You  don't  show  your  usual  acuteness,  Mr.  Quirk,"  re- 
plied Gammon  blandly.  "  It  is  to  make  waste  paper  01  that 
confounded  conveyance  which  he  executed,  and  which 
Mr.  Aubrey  has,  and  with  which  he  may,  at  a  stroke,  cut  the 
ground  from  under  our  feet." 

"  The  very  thought  makes  one  feel  quite  funny— don't  it, 
Gammon,  quoth  Quirk,  with  a  flustered  air. 

"  It  may  well  do  so,  Mr.  Quirk.  Now  we  are  fairly  em- 
barked in  a  cause  where  success  will  be  attended  with  so 
many  splendid  results,  Mr.  Quirk— though  I'm  sure  you'll 
always  bear  me  up  in  saying  how  very  unwilling  I  was  to 
take  advantage  of  the  villany  of  that  miscreant  Steg— hem 

"  Gammon,  Gammon,  you're  always  harking  back  to  that 
— I'm  tired  of  hearing  qn't!  " 

"  Well,  now  we're  in  it,  I  don't  see  why  we  should  allow 
ourselves  to  be  baffled  by  trifles.  The  plain  question  is,  un- 
doubtedly, whether  we  are  to  stand  still,  or  go  on."  Mr. 
Quirk  gazed  at  Mr.  Gammon  with  an  anxious  and  puzzled 
look. 

"  How  d'ye  make  out— in  a  legal  way,  you  know,  Gammon 
— when  a  man  died— I  mean,  of  a  natural  death  ?  "  inquired 
Quirk,  who  was  familiar  enough  with  the  means  of  proving 
the  exact  hour  of  certain  violent  deaths  at  Debtor's  Door. 

"  Oh,  there  are  various  methods  of  doing  so,  my  dear  sir," 
replied  Gammon  carelessly.  "(Entries  in  family-bibles  and 
prayer-books,  registers,  tombstones — ay,  by  the  way,  AN  OLD 
TOMBSTONE,"  continued  Gammon  musingly,  "that  would 
settle  the  business  ! " 

"An  old  tombstone!"  echoed  Quirk  briskly.  "Lord. 
Gammon,  so  it  would !  That's  an  idea !— I  call  that  a  decided 
idea,  Gammon.  T'would  be  the  very  thing ! " 

"  The  very  thing !  "  repeated  Gammon,  pointedly.  They 
remained  silent  for  some  moments. 

44  Snap  could  not  have  looked  about  him  sharply  enough, 
when  he  was  down  atYatton!"  at  length  observed  Quirk, 
in  a  low  tone  flushing  all  over  as  he  uttered  the  last  words, 
and  felt  Gammon's  cold  gray  eye  settled  on  him  like  that  of 
a  snake. 

"He  could  not,  indeed,  my  dear  sir,"  replied  Gammon, 


TEN  THOUSAND  A-TEAR.  291 

while  Quirk  continued  gazing  earnestly  at  him,  now  and  then 
wriggling  about  in  his  chair,  rubbing  his  chin,  and  drum- 
ming with  his  ringers  on  the  table. — "  And  now  that  you've 
suggested  the  thing,  it's  not  to  be  wondered  at— you  know,  it 
would  have  been  an  old  tombstone— a  sort  of  fragment  of  a 
tombstone,  perhaps— so  deeply  sunk  in  the  ground,  probably, 
as  easily  to  have  escaped  observation,  eh  ?  Does  not  it  strike 
you  so,  Mr.  Quirk?  "  All  this  was  said  by  Gammon  in  a  mus- 
ing manner,  and  in  a  very  low  tone  of  voice  ;  and  he  was  de- 
lignted  to  find  his  words  sinking  into  the  eager  rnind  of  his 
companion. 

"Ah,  Gammon!  "  exclaimed  Quirk,  with  a  sound  of  partly 
a  sigh,  and  partly  a  whistle,  (the  former  being  the  exponent 
of  the  true  state  of  his  feelings,  i.  e.  anxiety— the  latter  of 
what  he  wished  to  appear  the  state  of  his  feelings,  i.  e.  in- 
difference.) 

"Yes,  Mr.  Quirk?" 

"  You're  a  deep  devil,  Gammon— I  will  say  that  for  you !  " 
replied  Quirk,  glancing  towards  each  door,  and,  as  it  were, 
unconsciously  drawing  his  chair  a  little  closer  to  that  of 
Gammon. 

"  Nay,  my  dear  sir ! "  said  Gammon,  with  a  deferential  and 
deprecating  smile,  "  you  give  me  credit  for  an  acuteness  I 
feel  I  do  not  deserve  !  If,  indeed,  I  had  not  had  your  sagac- 
ity to  rely  upon,  ever  since  I  have  had  the  honor  of  being 

connected  with  you ah,  Mr.  Quirk,  you  know  you  lead—I 

follow- 


Gammon,  Gammon !    Come— your  name's  Oily ' 

"  In  moments  like  these,  Mr.  Quirk,  I  say  nothing  that  I 
do  not  feel,"  interrupted  Gammon  gravely,  putting  to  his 
nose  the  least  modicum  of  snuff  which  he  could  take  with 
the  tip  of  his  finger  out  of  the  huge  box  of  Mr.  Quirk,  who 
just  then,  was  thrusting  immense  pinches  every  half  minute 
up  his  nostrils. 

"  It  will  cost  a  great  deal  of  money  to  find  that  same  tomb- 
stone, Gammon ! "  said  Quirk,  in  almost  a  whisper,  and 
paused,  looking  intently  at  Gammon. 

"  I  think  this  is  a  different  kind  of  snuff  from  that  which 
you  usually  take,  Mr.  Quirk,  isn't  it  ?  "  inquired  Gammon,  as 
he  inserted  the  tips  of  his  fingers  into  the  box. 

"  The  same— the  same,"  replied  Quirk  mechanically. 

"  You  are  a  man  better  equal  to  serious  emergencies  than 
any  man  I  ever  came  near,"  said  Gammon  ;  "  I  perceive  that 
you  have  hit  the  nail  on  the  head,  as  indeed  you  always  do, 

"'Tut!  Stuff,  Gammon  ;  you're  every  bit  as  good  a  hand  as 
I  am."  Gammon  smiled,  shook  his  head,  and  shrugged  his 
shoulders. 

"  'Tis  that  practical  sagacity  of  yours,"  said  Gammon— 
"  you  know  it  as  well  as  I  can  tell  you— that  has  raised  you 
to  your  present  professional  eminence."  He  paused,  anq 
looked  very  sincerely  at  his  senior  partner. 


292  TEN  THOUSAND  A-YEAft. 

"  Well,  I  must  own  I  think  I  do  know  a  trick  or  two," 
quoth  Quirk,  with  a  sort  of  grunt  of  gratification. 

"  Ay,  and  further,  there  are  some  clever  men  that  never 
can  keep  their  own  counsel ;  but  are  like  a  hen  that  has  just 
laid  an  egg,  and  then  goes  foolishly  cackling  about  every- 
where, and  then  her  egg  is  taken  away ;  but  you " 

"  Ha,  ha !  "  laughed  Quirk  ;  "  that's  devilish  good,  Gam- 
mon !— Capital !  Gad,  I  think  I  see  the  hen  !  Ha,  ha!  " 

"  Ha,  ha !  "  echoed  Gammon  gently.  "  But  to  be  serious, 
Mr.  Quirk ;  what  I  was  going  to  say  was,  that  I  thoroughly 
appreciate  your  admirable  caution  in  not  confiding  to  any 
one— no,  not  even  to  me— the  exact  means  by  which  you  in- 
tend to  extricate  us  from  our  present  dilemma."  Here,  Quirk 
got  very  fidgety,  and  twirled  his  watch-key  violently. 

"  Hem !  But— hem !  Ay— a— a,"  he  grunted,  looking  with 
an  uneasy  air  at  his  calm  astute  companion ;  "  I  didn't  mean 
so  much  as  all  that,  either,  Gammon  ;  for  two  heads,  in  my 
opinion,  are  better  than  one.  You  must  own  that  Gammon !  " 
said  he,  not  at  all  relishing  the  heavy  burden  of  respon- 
sibility which  he  felt  that  Gammon  was  about  to  devolve 
upon  his  (Quirk's)  shoulders  exclusively. 

"  'Tis  undoubtedly  rather  a  serious  business  on  which  we 
are  now  entering,"  said  Gammon;  "and  I  have  always  ad- 
mired a  saying  which  you  years  ago  told  me  of  that  great 
man  Machiavel " 

[Oh,  Gammon !  Gammon !  You  well  know  that  poor  old 
Mr.  Quirk  never  heard  of  the  name  of  that  same  Machiavel 
till  this  moment !  ]— 

"That  when  great  affairs  are  stirring,  a  master-move 
should  be  confined  to  the  master-mind  that  projects  it.  I  un- 
derstand !  I  see !  I  will  not,  therefore,  inquire  into  the  pre- 
cise means  by  which  I  am  satisfied  you  will  make  it  appear, 
in  due  time  (while  I  am  engaged  getting  up  the  subordinate, 
but  very  harassing  details  of  the  general  case,)  that  Henry 
Dreddlington  died  before  the  7th  of  August  1742."  Here,  tak- 
ing out  his  watch — "  Bless  me,  Mr.  Quirk,  how  time  passes ! 
—Two  o'clock !  I  ought  to  have  been  at  Messrs.  Gregson's  a 
i  quarter  of  an  hour  ago." 

"  Stop— a  moment  or  two  can't  signify !  It— it,"  said  Quirk 
hesitatingly,  "  it  was  you,  wasn't  it,  that  thought  of  the  tomb- 
stone?" 

"  I !— my  dear  Mr.  Quirk  "—interrupted  Gammon,  with  a 
look  of  astonishment  and  deference. 

"  Come,  come— honor  among  thieves,  you  know,  Gammon ! " 
said  Quirk  trying  to  laugh. 

"  No— it  shall  never  be  said  that  I  attempted  to  take  the 

credit  of" commenced  Gammon;  when  a  clerk  entering, 

put  an  end  to  the  colloquy  between  the  partners,  each  of 
Avhom,  presently,  was  sitting  alone  in  his  own  room— for 
Gammon  found  that  he  was  too  late  to  think  of  keeping  his 
engagement  with  Messrs.  Gregson ;  if  indeed  he  had  ever 


TEN  THOUSAND  A-YEAE.  293 

made  any— which,  in  fact,  he  had  not-  Mr.  Quirk  sat  in  a 
musing  posture  for  nearly  half  an  hour  after  he  and  Gammon 
had  separated.  "  Gammon  is  a  deep  one !  I'll  be  shot  if  ever 
there  was  his  equal,"  said  Quirk  to  himself,  at  length ;  and 
starting  off  his  chair,  with  his  hands  crossed  behind  him,  he 
walked  softly  to  and  fro.  "  I  know  what  he's  driving  at— 
though  he  thought  I  didn't!  He'd  let  me  scratch  my 
hands  in  getting  the  blackberries,  and  then  he'd  com'e 
smiling  in  to  eat  'em!  But  — share  and  share  alike- 
share  profit,  share  danger,  Master  Gammon ;— you  may  find 
that  Caleb  Quirk  is  a  match  for  Oily  Gammon— I'll  have  you 
in  for  it,  one  way  or  another !  "  Here  occurred  a  long  pause 
in  his  thoughts.  "  Really  I  doubt  the  thing's  growing  un- 
manageable—the prize  can't  be  worth  the  risk !— Risk,  indeed 
— 'fore  Gad — it's  neither  more  nor  less  than "  Here  a  cer- 
tain picture  hanging,  covered  with  black  crape,  in  the  draw- 
ing-room at  Alibi  House,  seemed  to  have  glided  down  from 
its  station,  and  to  stand  before  his  eyes  with  the  crape  drawn 
aside— a  ghastly  object— eugh !  Pie  shuddered,  and  involun- 
tarily closed  his  eyes.  "  How  devilish  odd  that  I  should  just 
now  have  happened  to  think  of  it !  "  he  inwardly  exclaimed, 
sinking  into  his  chair,  in  a  sort  of  cold  sweat. 

"D— n  the  picture ! "  at  length  he  exclaimed,  almost  loud, 
getting  more  and  more  flustered—"  I'll  burn  it !  It  sha'n't 
disgrace  my  drawing-room  any  longer! "  Here  Quirk  almost 
fancied  that  some  busy  little  fiend  sat  squatting  before  the 
grisly  picture,  writing  the  words  "  CALEB  QUIRK  "  at  the  bot- 
tom of  it ;  and  a  sort  of  sickness  came  over  him  for  a  mo- 
ment. Presently  he  started  up,  and  took  down  one  of  several 
well-worn  dingy-looking  books  that  stood  on  the  shelves— a 
volume  of  Burns'  Justice.  Resuming  his  seat,  he  put  on  his 
glasses,  and  with  a  little  trepidation  turned  to  the  head"  For- 
gery," and  glanced  over  it,  divided  as  it  was  into  two  great 
heads—" Forgery  at  Common  Law,  and  Forgery  by  Statute" 
with  many  able  observations  of  the  learned  compiler,  and  im- 
portant "  cases  "  cited.  At  length  his  eye  lit  upon  a  para- 
graph that  seemed  suddenly  to  draw  his  heart  up  into  his 
throat,  producing  a  sensation  that  made  him  involuntarily 
clap  his  hand  upon  his  neck. 

"Oh,  Gammon!"  he  muttered,  drawing  off  his  glasses, 
sinking  back  in  his  chair,  and  looking  towards  the  door  that 
opened  into  Gammon's  room  ;  in  which  direction  he  extend- 
ed his  right  arm,  and  shook  his  fist.  "  You  precious  villain ! 
—I've  an  uncommon  inclination,"  at  length  thought  he,  "  to 
go  down  slap  to  Yorkshire— say  nothing  to  anybody— make 
peace  with  the  enemy,  and  knock  up  the  whole  thing !— For 
a  couple  of  thousand  pounds— a  trifle  to  the  Aubreys,  I'm 
sure.  Were  I  in  his  place,  I  shouldn't  grudge  it;  and  why 
should  he  ?— By  Jove,"  ne  got  a  little  heated—"  that  would  be, 
as  Gammon  has  it,  a  master  move !  and  confined,  egad !  to 


294         .  TEN  THOUSAND  A- YEAR. 

the  master  mind  that  thought  of  it !— Why  should  he  evei 
know  of  the  way  in  which  the  thing  blew  up?— Really 
'twould  be  worth  half  the  money  to  do  Gammon  so  hollow 
for  once— by  George  it  would !— Gammon,  that  would  slip 
Caleb  Quirk's  neck  so  slyly  into  the  halter,  indeed ! " 

"  I'll  tell  you  what,  Mr.  Quirk,"  said  Gammon,  suddenly 
re-entering  the  room  after  about  an  hour's  absence,  during 
which  he  too  had,  like  his  senior  partner,  been  revolving 
many  things  in  his  mind — "  it  has  occurred  to  me  that  I  had 
better  immediately  go  down  to  Yatton,  alone." 

Hereat  Mr.  Quirk  opened  both  his  eyes  and  his  mouth  to 
their  very  widest ;  got  very  red  in  the  face ;  and  stared  at 
his  placid  partner  with  a  mingled  expression  of  fear  and 
wonder.  "  Hang  me,  Gammon ! "  at  length  he  exclaimed, 
desperately  slapping  his  fist  upon  the  table — "if  I  don't 
think  you're  the  very  devil  himself !  "—and  he  sank  back  in 
his  chair,  verily  believing,  in  the  momentary  confusion  of 
his  thoughts,  that  what  had  been  passing  through  his  mind 
was  known  to  Gammon;  or  that  what  had  been  passing 
through  his  (Quirk's)  mind,  had  also  been  occurring  to  Gam- 
mon, who  had  resolved  upon  being  before  hand  in  putting 
his  purposes  into  execution.  Gammon  was  at  first  com- 
pletely confounded  by  Quirk's  reception  of  him,  and  stood 
for  a  few  moments,  with  his  hands  elevated,  in  silence. 
Then  he  approached  the  table,  and  his  eye  caught  the  well- 
thumbed  volume  of  Burns'  Justice,  open  at  the  head, 
"  FORGERY !  "—and  the  quick-sighted  Gammon  saw  how 
matters  stood  at  a  glance — the  process  by  which  the  result 
he  had  just  witnessed  had  been  arrived  at. 

"  Well,  Mr.  Quirk,  what  new  vagary  now  ? ''  he  inquired, 
with  an  air  of  smiling  curiosity. 

"  Vagary  be !  "  growled  old  Quirk,  sullenly,  without 

moving  in  his  chair. 

Gammon  stood  for  a  moment  or  two  eying  him  with  a 
keen  scrutiny.  "  What !  "  at  length  he  inquired,  goocl- 
humoredly,  "do  you  then  really  grudge  me  any  share  in 
the  little  enterprise  ? '' 

"  Eh  ? "  quickly  interrupted  Quirk,  pricking  up  his  ears. 
"  Do  you  intend  to  play  Mackivel !  en  ?  What  must  you  go 
down  alone  to  Yatton  for,  Gammon  ?  "  continued  Quirk  anx- 
iously. 

"  Why,  simply  as  a  sort  of  pioneer— to  reconnoitre  the 
churchyard— eh  ?  I  thought  it  might  have  been  of  service ; 
but  if—" 

" Gammon,  Gammon,  your  hand!  I  understand,"  replied 
Quirk,  evidently  vastly  relieved— most  cordially  shaking 
the  cold  hand  of  Gammon. 

"  But  understand,  Mr.  Quirk,"  said  he  in  a  very  peremp- 
tory manner,  "  no  one  upon  earth  is  to  know  of  my  visit  to 
Yatton  except  yourself. 

He  received  a  solemn  pledge  to  that  effect ;  and  presently 


TEN  THOUSAND  A-YEAR.  295 

the  partners  separated,  a  little  better  satisfied  with  each 
other.  Though  not  a  word  passed  between  them  for  several 
days  afterwards  on  the  topic  chiefly  discussed  during  the  in- 
terview above  described,  the  reader  may  easily  imagine  that 
neither  of  them  dropped  it  from  his  thoughts.  Mr.  Quirk 
paid  one  or  two  visits  to  the  neighborhood  of  Houndsditch 
(a  perfect  hotbed  of  clients),  where  resided  two  or  three 
gentlemen  of  the  Jewish  persuasion,  who  had  been  placed, 
from  time  to  time,  under  considerable  obligations  by  the 
firm  of  Quirk,  Gammon,  and  Snap,  in  respect  of  professional 
services  rendered  both  to  themselves  and  to  their  friends. 
One  of  them,  in  particular,  had  a  painful  consciousness  that 
it  was  in  old  Mr.  Quirk's  power  at  any  time,  by  a  whisper, 
to  place  his— the  aforesaid  Israelite's — neck  in  an  unsightly 
noose  that  every  now  and  then  might  be  seen  dangling  from 
a  beam  opposite  Debtor's  Door,  Newgate,  about  eight  o'clock 
in  the  morning ;  him,  therefore,  everj^  consideration  of  in- 
terest and  gratitude  combined  to  render  subservient  to  the 
reasonable  wishes  of  Mr.  Quirk.  He  was  a  most  ingenious 
little  fellow,  and  had  a  great  taste  for  the  imitative  arts— so 
strong  a  taste,  in  fact,  that  it  had  once  or  twice  placed  him 
in  some  jeopardy  with  the  Goths  and  Vandals  of  the  law, 
who  characterized  the  noble  art  in  which  he  excelled  by  a 
very  ugly  and  formidable  word,  and  annexed  the  most  bar- 
barous penalties  to  its  practice.  What  passed  between  him 
and  old  Quirk  on  the  occasion  of  their  interviews,  I  know 
not ;  but  one  afternoon,  the  latter,  on  returning  to  his  office, 
without  saying  anything  to  anybody,  having  bolted  the  door, 
took  out  of  his  pocket  several  little  pieces  of  paper,  contain- 
ing pretty  little  picturesque  devices  of  a  fragmentary  char- 
acter, with  antique  letters  and  figures  on  them — crumbling 
pieces  of  stone,  some  looking  more  and  some  less  sunk  in 
the  ground,  and  overgrown  with  grass  :  possibly  they  were 
designs  for  ornaments  to  be  added  to  that  tasteful  structure 
•—Alibi  House — possibly  intended  to  grace  Miss  Quirk's  al- 
bum. However  this  might  be,  after  he  had  looked  at  them 
and  carefully  compared  them  one  with  another  for  some 
time,  he  folded  them  up  in  a  sheet  of  paper,  sealed  it  up— 
with  certainly  not  the  steadiest  hand  in  the  world— and 
then  deposited  it  in  an  iron  safe. 


CHAPTER 

YATTON,  the  recovery  of  which  was  the  object  of  these 
secret  and  formidable  movements  and  preparations,  not  to  say 
machinations,  was  all  this  while  the  scene  of  deep  affliction. 
The  lamentable  condition  of  his  mother  plunged  Mr.  Aubrey, 
his  wife,  and  sister,  into  profounder  grief  than  had  been  oc- 
casioned by  the  calamity  which  menaced  them  all  in  cow- 


296  TEN  THOUSAND  A-YEAB. 

mon.  Had  he  been  alone,  he  would  have  encountered  the 
sudden  storm  of  adversity  with  unshrinking,  nay  cheerful 
firmness ;  but  could  it  be  so,  when  he  had  ever  before  him 
those  whose  ruin  was  involved  in  his  own? — Poor  Mrs. 
Aubrey,  his  wife,  having  been  two  or  three  weeks  confined 
to  her  bed,  during  which  time  certain  fond  hopes  of  the  hus- 
band had  been  blighted,  was  almost  overpowered,  when  lan- 
guid and  feeble,  supported  by  Mr.  Aubrey  and  Kate,  she 
first  entered  the  bed-room  of  the  venerable  sufferer.  What 
a  difference,  indeed,  was  there  between  the  appearance  of  all 
of  them  at  that  moment,  and  on  the  Christmas  day  when,  a 
happy  group,  they  were  cheerfully  enjoying  the  festivities  of 
the  season !  Kate  was  now  pale,  and  somewhat  thinner ;  her 
beautiful  features  exhibited  a  careworn  expression ;  yet 
there  was  a  serene  lustre  in  her  blue  eye,  and  a  composed 
resolution  in  her  air,  which  bespoke  the  superiority  of  her 
soul.  What  it  had  cost  her  to  bear  with  any  semblance  of 
self  possession,  or  fortitude,  the  sad  spectacle  now  presented 
by  her  mother!  What  a  tender  and  vigilant  nurse  was 
she,  to  one  who  could  no  longer  be  sensible  of,  or  appre- 
ciate, her  attentions!  How  that  sweet  girl  humored  all 
her  mother's  little  eccentricities  and  occasional  excite- 
ment, and  accommodated  herself  to  every  varying  phasis 
of  her  mental  malady!  She  had  so  schooled  her  sensi- 
bilities and  feelings  as  to  be  able  to  maintain  perfect 
cheerfulness  and  composure  in  her  mother's  presence,  on 
occasions  which  forced  her  brother,  and  his  shaken  wife 
to  turn  aside  with  an  eye  of  agony— overcome  by  some  touch- 
ing speech  or  wayward  action  of  the  unconscious  sufferer, 
who  constantly  imagined  herself,  poor  soul!  to  be  living 
over  again  her  early  married  life ;  and  that  in  her  little 
grand-children  she  beheld  Mr.  Aubrey  and  Kate  as  in  their 
childhood!  She  would  gently  chide  Mr.  Aubrey,  her 
husband,  for  his  prolonged  absence,  asking  many  times  a  day 
whether  he  had  returned  from  London.  Every  morning  old 
Jacob  Jones  was  shown  into  her  chamber,  at  the  hour  at 
which  he  had  been  accustomed,  in  happier  days  to  attend  up- 
on her.  The  faithful  old  man's  eyes  would  be  blinded  with 
tears,  and  his  voice  choked,  as  he  was  asked  how  Peggy  got 
over  her  yesterday's  journey;  and  listened  to  questions, 
messages,  and  directions,  which  had  been  familiar  to  him 
twenty  years  before,  about  villagers  and  tenants  who  had 
long  lain  mouldering  in  their  humble  graves — their  way 
thither  cheered  and  smoothed  by  her  Christian  charity  and 
benevolence !  '  T was  a  touching  sight  to  see  her  two  beautiful 
grandchildren,  in  whose  company  she  delighted,  brought, 
with  a  timorous  and  half-reluctant  air,  into  her  presence. 
How  strange  must  have  seemed  to  them  the  gayety  of  the 
motionless  figure  always  lying  in  the  bed :  a  gayety  which, 
though  gentle  as  gentle  could"  be,  yet  sufficed  not  to  assure 
the  little  things,  or  set  them  at  their  ease.  Though  her  mild 


TEN  THOUSAND  A-YEAE.  297 

features  ever  smiled  upon  them,  and  her  voice  was  cheerful, 
still  'twas  from  a  prostrate  figure  that  never  moved,  and  was 
always  surrounded  by  calm,  quiet  figures,  with  sorrowful 
constraint  in  their  countenances  and  gestures!  Charles 
would  stand  watching  her,  with  apprehensive  eye — the  finger 
of  one  hand  raised  to  his  lip,  while  his  other  retained  the 
hand  that  had  brought  him  in,  as  if  fearful  of  its  quitting 
hold  of  him ;  the  few  words  he  could  be  brought  to  speak 
were  in  a  subdued  tone  and  hurried  utterance : — and  wnen, 
having  been  lifted  up  to  kiss  his  grandmamma,  he  and  his 
sister  were  taken  out  of  the  chamber,  their  little  breasts 
would  heave  a  sigh  which  showed  how  relieved  they  were 
from  their  recent  constraint. 

How  wofully  changed  was  everything  in  the  once  cheerful 
old  Hall !  Mr.  Aubrey  sitting  in  the  library ;  intently  engaged 
upon  books  and  papers — Mrs.  Aubrey  and  Kate  now  and  then, 
arm  in  arm,  walking  slowly  up  and  down  the  galleries,  or 
one  of  the  rooms,  or  the  hall,  not  with  their  former  sprightly 
gayety,  but  pensive,  and  often  in  tears,  and  then  returning 
to  the  chamber  of  their  suffering  parent.  All  this  was  sad 
work,  indeed,  and  seemed,  as  it  were,  to  herald  in  coming 
desolation ! 

But  little  variation  occurred,  for  several  weeks,  in  the  con- 
dition of  Mrs.  Aubrey,  except  that  she  grew  visibly  feebler. 
One  morning,  however,  about  six  weeks  after  her  seizure, 
from  certain  symptoms  the  medical  men  intimated  their 
opinion  that  some  important  change  was  on  the  eve  of  taking 
place,  for  which  they  prepared  the  family.  She  had  been 
very  restless  during  the  night.  After  frequent  intervals  of 
uneasy  sleep,  she  would  awake  with  evident  surprise  and  be- 
wilderment. Sometimes  a  peculiar  smile  would  flit  over  her 
emaciated  features  ;  at  others,  they  would  be  overcast  with 
gloom,  and  she  would  seem  struggling  to  suppress  tears. 
Her  voice,  too,  when  she  spoke,  was  feeble  and  tremulous ; 
and  she  would  sigh,  and  shake  her  head  mournfully.  Old 
Jacob  Jones,  not  being  introduced  at  the  accustomed  hour, 
she  asked  for  him.  When  he  made  his  appearance,  she  gazed 
at  him  for  a  moment  or  two  with  a  puzzled  eye,  exclaiming 
"  Jacob !  Jacob  !  is  it  you  ?  "  in  a  very  low  tone  ;  and  then 
she  closed  her  eyes,  apparently  falling  asleep.  Thus  passed 
the  day ;  her  daughter  and  daughter-in-law  sitting  on  either 
side  of  the  bed,  where  they  had  so  long  kept  their  anxious  and 
affectionate  vigils— Mr.  Aubrey  sitting  at  the  foot  of  the  bed 
— and  Dr.  Goddart  and  Mr.  Whateleyin  frequent  attendance. 
Towards  the  evening,  Dr.  Tatham  also,  as  had  been  his  daily 
custom  through  her  illness,  appeared,  and  in  a  low  tone  read 
over  the  service  for  the  visitation  of  the  sick.  Shortly  after- 
wards Mr.  Aubrey  was  obliged  to  quit  the  chamber,  in  order 
to  attend  to  some  very  pressing  matters  of  business ;  and  he 
had  been  engaged  for  nearly  an  hour,  intending  almost  every 
moment  to  return  to  his  mother's  chamber,  when  Dr.  Tatham 


298  TEN  THOUSAND  A-TEAK 

entered,  as  Mr.  Aubrey  was  subscribing  his  name  to  a  letter, 
and,  with  a  little  earnestness,  said  Come,  my  friend,  let  us  re- 
turn to  your  mother ;  methinks  she  is  on  the  eve  of  some 
decisive  change  :  the  issue  is  with  God."  Within  a  very  few 
moments  they  were  both  at  the  bedside  of  Mrs.  Aubrey.  A 
large  chamber-lamp,  standing  on  the  table  at  a  little  distance 
from  the  bed,  diffused  a  soft  light  over  the  room,  rendering 
visible  at  a  glance  the  silent  and  sad  group  collected  round 
the  bed,  all  with  their  eyes  directed  towards  the  venerable 
figure  who  lay  upon  it.  Mr.  Aubrey  sat  beside  his  wife  close 
to  his  mother ;  and  taking  her  thin,  emaciated  hand  into  his 
own,  gently  raised  it  to  his  lips.  She  seemed  dozing  ;  but 
his  action  appeared  to  rouse  her  for  a  moment.  Presently  she 
fixed  her  eye  upon  him— its  expression,  the  while,  slowly  but 
perceptibly  changing,  and  exciting  strange  feelings  within 
him.  He  trembled  and  removed  not  his  eye  from  hers.  He 
turned  very  pale— for  the  whole  expression  of  his  mother's 
countenance,  which  was  turned  full  towards  him,  was  chang- 
ing. Through  the  clouded  windows  of  the  falling  fabric,  be- 
hold !  its  long  imprisoned  tenant,  THE  SOUL,  had  arisen  from 
its  torpor,  and  was  looking  at  him.  Reason  was  re-appearing. 
It  was,  indeed,  his  mother,  and  in  her  right  mind,  that  was 
gazing  at  him.  He  scarcely  breathed.  At  length  surprise 
and  apprehension  yielded  before  a  gush  of  tenderness  and  love. 
With  what  an  unutterable  look  was  his  mother  at  that  mo- 
ment regarding  him  !  His  lip  quivered — his  eye  overflowed 
— and,  as  he  felt  her  fingers  very  gently  compressing  his  own, 
his  tears  fell  down.  Gently  leaning  forward,  he  kissed  her 
cheek  and  sank  on  one  knee  beside  the  bed. 

"  Is  it  you,  my  son  ?  "  said  she,  in  a  very  low  tone,  but  in 
her  own  voice,  and  it  stirred  up  instantly  a  thousand  fond  rec- 
ollections, almost  overpowering  him.  He  kissed  her  hand 
with  fervent  energy,  but  spoke  not.  She  continued  gazing 
at  him  with  mingled  solemnity  and  fondness.  Her  eye 
seemed  brightening  as  it  remained  fixed  upon  him.  Again 
she  spoke,  in  a  very  low  but  clear  voice — every  thrilling  word 
being  heard  by  every  one  around  her— "Or  ever  the,  silver 
cord  be  loosed,  or  the  golden  bowl  be  broken,  or  the  pitcher  be 
broken  at  the  fountain,  or  the  wheel  broken  at  the  cistern, — 
Then  shall  the  dust  return  to  the  earth  as  it  was  ;  and  the 
spirit  shall  return  unto  God  who  gave  it."  It  would  be  in 
vain  to  attempt  to  describe  the  manner  in  which  these  words 
were  spoken ;  and  which  fell  upon  those  who  heard  them  as 
though  they  were  listening  to  one  from  the  dead. 

"  My  mother  1— my  mother !  "  at  length  faltered  Aubrey. 

"God  bless  thee  my  son!"  said  she  solemnly.  "And 

Catharine,  my  daughter— God  bless  thee "  she  presently 

added,  gently  turning  round  her  head  towards  the  quarter 
whence  a  stifled  sob  issued  from  Miss  Aubrey,  who  rose, 
trembling,  and  leaning  over,  kissed  her  mother.  "  Agnes, 
are  you  here— and  your  little  ones?— God  bless "  Her 


TEN  THOUSAND  A-YEAE.  299 

voice  got  fainter,  and  her  eyes  closed.  Mr.  Whateley  gave 
her  a  few  drops  of  ether,  and  she  presently  revived. 

"  God  has  been  very  good  to  you,  madam,"  said  Dr.  Tatham, 
observing  her  eye  fixed  upon  him,  "  to  restore  you  thus  to 
your  children." 

"  I  have  been  long  absent — long !— I  wake,  my  children,  but 
to  bid  you  farewell,  forever,  upon  earth." 

"  Say  not  so,  my  mother — my  precious  mother ! "  exclaimed 
her  son,  in  vain  endeavoring  to  suppress  his  emotions. 

"  I  do,  my  son !  Weep  not  for  me ;  I  am  old,  and  am  sum- 
moned away  from  among  you  " — She  ceased,  as  if  from  ex- 
haustion ;  and  no  one  spoke  for  some  minutes. 

"  It  may  be  that  God  hath  roused  me,  as  it  were,  from  the 
dead,  to  comfort  my  sorrowful  children  with  words  of  hope," 
said  Mrs.  Aubrey,  with  much  more  power  and  distinctness 
than  before.  "  Hope  ye,  then,  in  God  ;  for  ye  shall  yet  praise 
him  who  is  the  health  of  your  countenance,  and  your  God  ! 

"  We  will  remember,  my  mother,  your  words ! "  faltered 
her  son. 

"  Yes,  my  son— if  days  of  darkness  be  at  hand  "—She  ceas- 
ed. Again  Mr.  Whateley  placed  to  her  white  lips  a  glass 
with  some  reviving  fluid — looking  ominously  at  Mr.  Aubrey, 
as  he  found  that  she  continued  insensible.  Miss  Aubrey 
sobbed  audibly;  indeed,  all  present  were  powerfully  affected. 
Again  Mrs.  Aubrey  revived,  and  swallowed  a  few  drops  of 
wine  and  water.  A  heavenly  serenity  diffused  itself  over  her 
emaciated  features. 

"  We  shall  meet  again,  my  loves ! — I  can  no  longer  see  you 
with  the  eyes  of"— Mr.  Whateley  observing  a  sudden 
change,  came  nearer  to  her. 

"  Peace !  peace  ! "  she  murmured  almost  inarticulately.  A 
dead  silence  ensued,  interrupted  only  by  smothered  sobs. 
Her  children  sank  on  their  knees,  and  buried  their  faces  in 
their  hands,  trembling. 

Mr.  Whateley  made  a  silent  signal  to  Dr.  Tatham,  that  life 
had  ceased— that  the  beloved  spirit  had  passed  away.  "  The 
Lord  gave,  and  the  Lord  hath  taken  away :  blessed  be  the 
name  of  the  Lord  !  "  said  Dr.  Tatham,  with  tremulous  solem- 
nity. Mrs.  Aubrey  and  Miss  Aubrey,  no  longer  able  to  re- 
strain their  feelings,  wept  bitterly ;  and,  overpowered  with 
grief,  were  supported  out  of  the  room  by  Dr.  Tatham  and 
Mr.  Aubrey.  As  soon  as  it  was  known  that  the  venerable 
mother  of  Mr.  Aubrey  was  no  more,  universal  reverence  was 
testified  for  her  memory,  and  sympathy  for  the  afflicted  sur- 
vivors, by  even  those,  high  and  low,  in  the  remoter  parts  of 
the  neighborhood  who  had  no  personal  acquaintance  with 
the  family.  Two  or  three  days  afterwards,  the  undertaker, 
who  had  received  orders  from  Mr.  Aubrey  to  provide  a  sim- 
ple and  unexpensive  funeral,  submitted  to  him  a  list  of  more 
than  thirty  names  of  the  nobility  and  gentry  of  the  country, 
who  had  sent  to  him  to  know  whether  it  would  be  agreeable 


500  TEN  THOUSAND  A-YEAK. 

to  the  family  for  them  to  be  allowed  to  attend  Mrs.  Aubrey's 
remains  to  the  grave.  After  much  consideration,  Mr.  Au- 
brey accepted  of  this  spontaneous  tribute  of  respect  to  the 
memory  of  his  mother.  'Twas  a  memorable  and  melancholy 
day  on  which  the  interment  took  place — one  never  to  be  for- 
gotten at  Yatton.  What  can  be  more  chilling  than  the 
gloomy  bustle  of  a  great  funeral,  especially  in  the  country  ; 
and  when  the  deceased  is  one  whose  memory  is  enshrined  in 
the  holiest  feelings  of  all  who  know  her?  What  person  was 
there,  for  miles  around,  who  could  not  speak  of  the  courte- 
sies, the  charities,  the  goodness  of  Madam  Aubrey ! 

When  the  ear  heard  her,  then  it  blessed  her ;  and  when  the 
eye  saw  her,  it  gave  icitness  to  her  : 

Because  she  delivered  the  poor  that  cried,  and  the  fatherless, 
and  him  that  had  none  to  help  him. 

The  blessing  of  him  that  was  ready  to  perish  came  upon  her, 
and  she  caused  the  widow's  heart  to  sing  for  joy. 

She  was  eyes  to  the  blind,  and  feet  was  she  to  the  lame. 

She  was  a  mother  to  the  poor. 

Pale  as  death,  the  chief  mourner,  wrapped  in  his  black  cloak, 
is  stepping  into  the  mourning-coach.  No  one  speaks  to  him : 
his  face  is  buried  in  his  handkerchief ;  his  heart  seems  break- 
ing. He  thinks  of  her  whose  dear  dust  is  before  him  ; — then 
of  the  beloved  beings  whom  he  has  left  alone  in  their  agony 
till  his  return — his  wife  and  sister.  The  procession  moving 
slowly  on — long,  silent  rows  of  the  tenantry  and  villagers, 
old  and  young,  male  and  female — not  a  dry  eye  among  them, 
nor  a  syllable  spoken — stand  on  each  side  of  the  way ;  no 
sound  heard  but  of  horses'  feet,  and  wheels  crushing  along 
the  wet  gravel— for  the  day  is  most  gloomy  and  inclement. 
As  they  quit  the  gates,  carriage  after  carriage  follows  in  the 
rear;  and  the  sorrowful  crowd  increases  around  them.  Many 
have  in  their  hands  the  bibles  and  prayer-books  which  had 
been  given  them  by  her  who  now  lies  in  yonder  hearse ;  and 
a  few  can  recollect  the  day  when  the  great  lord  of  Yatton 
led  her  along  from  the  church  to  the  Hall,  his  young  and 
blooming  bride— in  pride  and  joy— and  they  are  now  going  to 
lay  her  beside  him  again.  They  enter  the  little  churchyard, 
and  are  met  by  good  Dr.  Tatham,  in  his  surplice,  barehead- 
ed, and  with  book  in  hand  ;  with  full  eye  and  quivering  lip 
he  slowly  precedes  the  body  into  the  church.  His  voice  fre- 
quently trembles,  and  sometimes  he  pauses  while  reading 
tne  service.  Now  they  are  standing  bareheaded  at  the  vault's 
mouth — the  last  sad  rit.es  are  being  performed  ;  and  probably, 
as  is  thinking  the  chief  mourner,  over  the  last  of  his  race 
who  will  rest  in  that  tomb ! 

Long  after  the  solemn  ceremony  was  over,  the  little  church- 
yard remained  filled  with  mournful  groups  of  villagers  and 
tenants,  who  pressed  forward  to  the  dark  mouth  of  the  vault, 
to  take  their  last  look  at  the  coffin  which  contained  the  re- 
mains of  her  whose  memory  would  live  long  in  all  theii 


TEN  THOUSAND  A-YEAU.  301 

hearts*  "Ah,  dear  old  madam,"  quoth  Jonas  Higgs  to  him- 
self, as  he  finished  his  dreary  day's  labors,  by  temporarily 
closing  up  the  mouth  of  the  vault,  "  they  might  have  turned 
thee,  by-and-by,  out  of  yonder  Hall,  but  they  shall  not  touch 
thee  here  !  " 

Thus  died,  and  was  buried,  Madam  Aubrey ;  and  she  is 
not  yet  forgotten. 

How  desolate  seemed  the  Hall,the  next  morning,  to  the  be- 
reaved inmates,  as,  dressed  in  deep  mourning,  they  met  at 
the  cheerless  breakfast  table  !  Aubrey  kissed  his  wife  and 
sister — who  could  hardly  answer  his  brief  inquiries-  The 
gloom  occasioned  throughout  the  Hall,  for  the  last  ten  days, 
by  the  blinds  being  constantly  drawn  down,  now  that  they 
\yere  drawn  up,  had  given  way  to  a  staring  light  and  dis- 
tinctness, that  almost  startled  and  offended  the  eyes  of  those 
whose  hearts  were  dark  with  sorrow  as  ever.  Every  object 
reminded  them  of  the  absence  of  one— whose  chair  stood 
empty  in  its  accustomed  place.  There,  also,  was  her  Bible, 
on  the  little  round  table  near  the  window.  The  mourners 
seemed  relieved  by  the  entrance,  by-and-by,  of  the  children : 
but  they  were  also  in  mourning !  Let  us,  however,  withdraw 
from  this  scene  of  suffering,  where  every  object,  every  recol- 
lection, every  association,  causes  the  wounded  heart  to  bleed 
afresh. 

Great  troubles  seem  coming  upon  them;  and  now  that 
they  have  buried  their  dead  out  of  their  sight,  and  when  time 
shall  begin  to  pour  his  balm  into  their  present  smarting 
wounds,  I  doubt  not  that  they  will  look  those  troubles  in  the 
face,  calmly  and  with  fortitude,  not  forgetful  of  the  last 
words  of  her  for  whom  they  now  mourn  so  bitterly,  and 
whom,  beloved  and  venerable  being !  God  hath  mercifully 
taken  away  from  evil  days  that  are  to  come. 

After  much  and  anxious  consideration,  they  resolved  to  go, 
on  the  ensuing  Sunday  morning,  to  church,  where  neither 
Mrs.  Aubrey  nor  Kate  had  been  since  the  illness  of  her 
mother.  The  little  church  was  crowded  ;  almost  every  one 
present,  besides  wearing  a  saddened  countenance,  exhibited 
some  outward  mark  of  respect,  in  their  dress — some  badge 
of  mourning— such  as  their  little  means  admitted  of.  The 
pulpit  and  reading-desk  were  hung  in  black,  as  also  was  Mr. 
Aubrey's  pew— an  object  of  deep  interest  to  the  congregation, 
who  expected  to  see  at  least  some  member  of  the  family  at 
the  Hall.  They  were  not  disappointed.  A  little  before  Dri 
Tatham  took  his  place  in  the  reading-desk,  the  well-known 
sound  of  the  family  carriage-wheels  was  heard,  as  it  drew  up 
before  the  gate  :  and  presently,  Mr.  Aubrey  appeared  at  the 
church  door,  with  his  wife  and  sister  on  either  arm ;  all  of 
them,  of  course,  in  the  deepest  mourning— Mrs.  and  Miss 
Aubrey's  countenances  concealed  beneath  their  long  crape 
veils.  For  some  time  after  taking  their  seats,  they  seemed 
oppressed  with  emotion,  evidently  weeping.  Mr.  Aubrey, 


TEN  THOUSAND  A-YEAR. 

however,  exhibited  great  composure,  though  his  countenance 
bore  the  traces  of  the  suffering  he  had  undergone.  Mrs.  Au- 
brey seldom  rose  from  her  seat ;  but  Kate  stood  up,  from 
time  to  time,  with  the  rest  of  the  congregation  ;  her  white 
handkerchief,  however,  might  be  seen  frequently  raised  to 
her  eyes,  beneath  her  black  veil.  As  the  service  went  on, 
she  seemed  to  have  struggled  with  some  success  against  her 
feelings.  To  relieve  herself  for  a  moment  from  its  oppres- 
sive closeness,  she  gently  drew  aside  her  veil ;  and  thus,  for  a 
few  minutes,  exhibited  a  countenance  inexpressibly  beauti- 
ful. She  could  not,  however,  long  bear  to  face  a  congrega- 
tion, every  one  whom  she  felt  to  be  looking  on  her,  and  those 
beside  her,  with  affectionate  sympathy ;  and  rather  quickly 
drew  her  veil  again  over  her  face,  without  again  removing 
it.  There  was  one  person  present,  on  whom  the  brief  glimpse 
of  her  beauty  had  produced  a  prodigious  impression.  As  he 
gazed  at  her,  the  color  gradually  deserted  his  cheek ;  and  his 
eye  remained  fixed  upon  her,  even  after  she  had  drawn  down 
her  veil.  He  experienced  emotions  such  as  he  had  never 
known  before.  So  that  was  Miss  Aubrey  f 

Mr.  Gammon— for  he  it  was,  and  he  had  gone  thither, 
under  the  expectation  of  seeing,  for  the  first  time,  some  of 
the  Aubrey  family— generally  passed  for  a  cold-blooded  per- 
son;  and  in  fact  few  men  living  had  more  control  over  their 
feelings,  or  more  systematically  checked  any  manifestations 
of  them  ;  but  there" was  something  in  the  person  and  circum- 
stances of  Miss  Aubrey — for  by  a  hurried  inquiry  of  the  per- 
son next  to  him  he  learned  that  it  was  she— which  excited 
new  feelings  in  him.  Her  slightest  motion  his  eye  watched 
with  intense  eagerness  ;  and  faint  half-formed  schemes,  pur- 
poses, and  hopes,  passed  in  rapid  confusion  through  his 
mind,  as  he  foresaw  that  circumstances  would  hereafter 
arise  by  means  of  which — 

"  Good  heavens  !  how  very— very  beautiful  she  is !"  said  he 
to  himself,  as,  the  service  over,,  her  graceful  figure,  follow- 
ing her  brother  and  his  wife  with  slow  sad  step,  approached 
the  pew  in  which  he  was  standing,  on  her  way  to  the  door. 
He  felt  a  sort  of  cold  shudder,  as  her  black  dress  rustled 
past,  actually  touching  him.  What  was  he  doing  and  medi- 
tating against  that  lovely  being  ?  And  for  whom—disgust- 
ing reptile !— for  Titmouse  ?  He  almost  blushed  with  a  con- 
flict of  emotions,  as  he  followed  almost  immediate^  after 
Miss  Aubrey,  never  losing  sight  of  her  till  her  brother,  hav- 
ing handed  her  into  the  carriage,  got  in  after  her,  and  they 
drove  off  towards  the  Hall. 

The  reader  will  not  be  at  a  loss  to  account  for  the  presence 
of  Gammon  on  this  occasion,  nor  to  connect  it  with  a  great 
trial  at  the  approaching  York  assizes.  As  he  walked  back 
to  Grilston  to  his  solitary  dinner,  he  was  lost  in  thought; 
and  on  arriving  at  the  inn,  repaired  at  once  to  his  room, 
where  he  found  a  copy  of  the  Sunday  Flash,  which  had, 


TEN  THOUSAND  A-YEAR.  303 

according  to  orders,  been  sent  to  him  from  town,  under  his 
assumed  name,  "Gibson."  He  ate  but  little,  and  that 
mechanically ;  and  seemed  to  feel,  for  once,  little  or  no  in- 
terest in  his  newspaper.  He  had  never  paid  the  least  atten- 
tion to  the  eulogia  upon  Miss  Aubrey  of  the  little  idiot  Tit- 
mouse, nor  of  Snap,  of  whom  he  entertained  but  a  very  little 
higher  opinion  than  of  Titmouse.  One  thing  was  clear,  that 
from  that  moment  Miss  Aubrey  formed  a  new  element  in 
Mr.  Gammon's  calculations ;  and  for  aught  I  know,  may 
occasion  very  different  results  from  those  originally  con« 
templated  by  that  calm  and  crafty  person. 

As  it  proved  a  moonlight  night,  he  resolved  at  once  to  set 
about  the  important  business  which  had  brought  him  into 
Yorkshire  :  and  for  that  purpose  set  off  about  eight  o'clock 
on  his  walk  to  Yatton.  About  ten  o'clock  he  might  have 
been  seen  gliding  into  the  churchyard,  like  a  dangerous 
snake.  The  moon  continued  to  shine — and  at  intervals  with 
brightness  sufficient  for  his  purpose,  which  was  simply  to 
reconnoitre,  as  closely  as  possible,  the  little  churchyard — to 
ascertain  what  it  might  contain,  and  what  were  its  capa- 
bilities. At  length  he  approached  the  old  yew-tree,  against 
whose  huge  trunk  he  leaned  with  folded  arms,  apparently 
in  a  reverie.  Hearing  a  noise  as  of  some  one  opening  the 
gate  by  which  he  had  entered,  he  glided  further  into  the 
gloom  behind  him  ;  and  turning  his  head  in  the  direction 
whence  the  sound  came,  he  beheld  some  one  entering  the 
churchyard.  His  heart  beat  quickly ;  and  he  suspected  that 
he  had  been  watched ;  yet  there  "was  surely  no  harm  in  being 
seen,  at  ten  o'clock  at  night,  looking  about  him  in  a  country 
churchyard.  It  was  a  gentleman  who  entered,  dressed  in 
deep  mourning;  and  Gammon  quickly  recognized  in  him 
Mr.  Aubrey — the  brother  of  her  whose  beautitul  image  still 
shone  before  his  mind's  eye.  What  could  he  be  wanting 
there  ?— at  that  time  of  night  ?  Gammon  was  not  kept  long 
in  doubt ;  for  the  stranger  slowly  bent  his  steps  towards  a 
large  high  tomb,  in  fact  the  central  object,  next  to  the  yew- 
tree,  in  the  churchyard— and  stood  gazing  at  it  in  silence  for 
some  time. 

"  That  is,  no  doubt,  where  Mrs.  Aubrey  was  buried  the 
other  day,"  thought  he,  watching  the  movements  of  the 
stranger,  who  presently  raised  his  handkerchief  to  his  eyes. 
and  for  some  moments  seemed  indulging  in  great  grief. 
Gammon  distinctly  heard  either  a  sob  or  a  sigh.  "  He  must 
have  been  very  fond  of  her,"  thought  Gammon.  "  Well,  if 
we  succeed,  the  excellent  old  lady  will  have  escaped  a  great 
deal  of  trouble— that's  all."  "If  we  succeed!""  That  re- 
minded him  of  what  he  had  for  a  few  moments  lost  sight  of, 
namely,  his  own  object  of  coming  thither ;  and  he  felt  a  sud- 
den chill  of  remorse,  which  increased  upon  him  till  he 
almost  trembled,  as  his  eye  continued  fixed  on  Mr.  Aubrey, 
and  he  thought  also  of  Miss  Aubrey— and  the  misery— the 


304  TEN  THOUSAND  A-YEAE. 

utter  ruin  into  which  he  was  seeking  to  plunge  them  both—- 
the unhallowed  means  which  they— which  he— contem- 
plated resorting  to  for  that  purpose. 

Gammon's  condition  was  becoming  every  moment  more 
serious  ;  for  VIRTUE,  in  the  shape  of  Miss  Aubrey,  began  to 
shine  every  moment  in  more  radiant  loveliness  before  him— 
and  he  almost  felt  an  inclination  to  sacrifice  every  person 
connected  with  the  enterprise  in  which  he  was  engaged,  if 
it  would  give  him  a  chance  of  winning  the  favor  of  Miss 
Aubrey.  Presently,  however,  Mr.  Aubrey,  evidently  heav- 
ing a  deep  sigh,  bent  his  steps  slowly  back  again,  and  quitted 
the  churchyard.  Gammon  watched  his  figure  out  of  sight, 
and  then,  for  the  first  time  since  Mr.  Aubrey's  appearance, 
breathed  freely.  Relieved  from  the  pressure  of  his  presence, 
Gammon  began  to  take  calmer  and  juster  views  of  his 
position ;  and  he  reflected,  that  if  he  pushed  on  the  present 
affair  to  a  successful  issue,  he  should  be  much  more  likely, 
than  by  prematurely  ending  it.  to  gain  his  objects.  He 
therefore  resumed  his  survey  of  the  scene  around  him ;  and 
which  presented  appearances  highly  satisfactory,  judging 
from  the  expression  which  now  and  then  animated  his 
countenance.  At  length  he  wandered  round  to  the  other 
end  of  the  church,  where  a  crumbling  wall,  half-covered 
with  ivy,  indicated  that  there  had  formerly  stood  some 
building  apparently  of  earlier  date  than  the  church.  Such 
was  the  fact.  Gammon  soon  found  himself  standing  in  a 
sort  of  inclosure,  which  had  once  been  the  site  of  an  old 
chapel.  And  here  he  had  not  been  long  making  his  obser- 
vations, before  he  achieved  a  discovery  of  so  extraordinary 
a  nature ;  one  so  unlikely,  under  the  circumstances,  to  have 
happened ;  one  so  calculated  to  baffle  ordinary  calculations 
concerning  the  course  of  events,  that  the  reader  may  well 
disbelieve  what  I  am  going  to  tell  him,  and  treat  it  as 
absurdly  improbable.  In  snort,  not  to  keep  him  in  suspense. 
Gammon  positively  discovered  evidence  of  the  death  of 
Harry  Dreddlington  in  his  father's  lifetime ;  by  means  of 
just  such  a  looking  tombstone  as  he  had  long  imaged  to  him- 
self ;  and  as  he  had  resolved  that  old  Quirk  should  have 
got  prepared,  before  the  cause  came  into  court.  He 
almost  stumbled  over  it.  'Twas  an  old  slanting  stone, 
scarce  two  feet  above  the  ground,  partly  covered 
with  moss,  and  partly  hid  by  rubbish  and  old  damp  grass. 
The  moon  shone  brightly  enough  to  enable  Gammon,  kneel- 
ing down,  to  decipher,  beyond  all  doubt,  what  was  requisite 
to  establish  that  part  of  the  case  which  had  been  wanting. 
For  a  moment  or  two  he  was  disposed  to  doubt  whether  he 
was  not  dreaming.  When,  at  length,  he  took  out  pencil 
and  paper,  his  hands  trembled  so  much  that  he  felt  some 
difficulty  in  making  an  exact  copy  of  the  inestimable  inscrip- 
tion. Haying  done  this,  he  drew  a  long  breath  as  he  replaced 
the  pencil  and  paper  in  his  pocket-book,  and  almost  he  heard. 


TEN  THOUSAND  A-YEAR.  305 

ft  whispering  sound  in  the  air — "  Verdict  for  the  plaintiff." 
Quitting  the  churchyard,  he  walked  back  to  Grilston  at  a 
much  quicker  rate  than  that  at  which  he  had  come,  his  dis- 
covery having  wonderfully  elated  him,  and  pushed  all  other 
thoughts  entirely  out  of  his  mind.  But,  thought  he,  doubt- 
less the  other  side  are  aware  of  the  existence  of  this  tomb- 
stone— they  can  hardly  be  supposed  ignorant  of  it :  they 
must  have  looked  up  their  evidence  as  well  as  we— arid  their 
attention  has  been  challenged  to  the  existence  or  non-exist- 
ence of  proof  of  the  time  of  the  death  of  Harry  Dreddling- 
ton  : — well— if  they  are  aware  of  it,  they  know  that  it  cuts 
the  ground  from  under  them,  and  turns  their  conveyance,  on 
which,  doubtless,  they  are  relying,  into  waste  paper  ;  if  they 
are  not,  and  are  under  the  impression  that  that  deed  is  valid 
and  effectual,  our  proof  will  fall  on  them  like  a  thunderbolt. 
"Gad,"— he  held  his  breath,  and  stopped  in  the  middle  of  the 
road—"  how  immensely  important  is  this  little  piece  of  evi- 
dence !  Why,  if  they  knew  of  it— why  in  Heaven's  name  is 
it  there  still  ?  What  easier  than  to  have  got  rid  of  it  ?— why 
they  may  still :  what  can  that  stupid  fellow  Parkinson  have 
been  about?  Yet,  is  it  because  it  has  become  unimportant, 
on  account  of  their  being  in  possession  of  other  evidence  ? 
What  can  they  have  to  set  against  so  plain  a  case  as  ours  is, 
with  this  evidence  ?  Gad,  I'll  not  lose  one  day's  time  ;  but 
I'll  have  half-a-dozen  competent  witnesses  to  inspect,  and 
speak  to  that  same  tombstone  in  court."  Such  were  some  of 
the  thoughts  which  passed  through  his  mind  as  he  hastened 
homeward ;  and  on  his  arrival,  late  as  it  was— only  the  yawn- 
ing ostler  being  up  to  let  him  in— he  sat  down  to  write  a  let- 
ter off  to  Mr.  Quirk,  and  made  it  into  a  parcel  to  go  by  the 
mail  in  the  morning,  acquainting  him  with  the  truly  provi- 
dential discovery  he  had  just  made,  and  urging  him  to  set 
about  getting  up  the  briefs,  for  the  trial,  without  delay ;  he 
himself,  purposing  to  stop  at  Grilston  a  day  or  two  longer,  to 
complete  one  or  two  other  arrangements  of  an  important 
nature.  As  soon  as  Mr.  Quirk  had  read  this  letter,  he  de- 
voutly thanked  God  for  His  goodness ;  and  hurrying  to  his 
strong-box,  unlocked  it,  took  out  a  small  sealed  packet,  and 
committed  it  to  the  flames. 

Mr.  Aubrey,  as  soon  as  he  had  recovered  from  the  first 
shock  occasioned  by  the  communication  by  Mr.  Parkinson 
of  the  proceedings  against  him,  set  about  acquainting  him- 
self, as  minutely  as  he  could,  with  the  true  state  of  the  case. 
He  had  requested  Mr.  Parkinson  to  obtain  from  one  of  the 
counsel  in  London,  Mr.  Crystal,  a  full  account  of  the  case,  in 
an  elementary  form,  for  his  o\yn  guidance ;  and  on  obtaining 
a  remarkably  clear  and  luminous  statement,  and  also  con- 
sulting the  various  authorities  cited  in  it — such,  at  least,  as 
could  be  supplied  t9  him  by  Mr.  Parkinson— the  vigorous 
practical  understanding  of  Mr.  Aubrey,  aided  by  his  patient 
application,  soon  mastered  the  whole  case,  and  enabled  him 


306  TEN  THOUSAND  A-TEAR. 

to  appreciate  the  peril  in  which  he  was  placed.  Since  he 
could  derive  no  title  through  the  conveyance  of  Harry  Dred- 
dlington (which  had  been  got  in  by  Geoffry  Dreddlington,) 
owing  to  the  death  of  the  former  in  his  father's  lifetime,  as 
he  (Mr.  Aubrey)  understood  from  his  advisers  could  be  easily 
proved  by  the  present  claimant  of  the  property ;  the  right  of 
accession  of  Geoffry  Dreddlington' s  descendants  depended 
entirely  upon  the  fact  whether  or  not  Stephen  Dreddlington 
had  really  died  without  issue ;  and  as  to  that,  certain  anxious 
and  extensive  inquiries  instituted  by  Messrs.  Runnington 
and  Mr.  Parkinson,  in  pursuance  of  the  suggestions  of  their 
able  and  experienced  counsel,  had  led  them  to  entertain 
serious  doubts  concerning  the  right  of  Geoff ry's  descendants 
to  have  entered  into  possession.  By  what  means  his  oppo- 
nents had  obtained  their  clue  to  the  state  of  his  title,  neither 
he  nor  any  of  his  advisers  could  frame  a  plausible  conjecture. 
It  was  certainly  possible  that  Stephen  Dreddlington,  who 
was  known  to  have  been  a  man,  like  his  uncle  Harry,  of  wild 
and  eccentric  habits,  and  to  have  been  supposed  to  leave  no 
issue,  might  have  married  privately  some  woman  of  inferior 
station,  and  left  issue  by  her,  who,  living  in  obscurity,  and 
at  a  distance  from  the  seat  of  the  family  property,  could 
have  no  opportunity  of  inquiring  into  or  ascertaining  their 
position  with  reference  to  the  estates,  till  some  acute  and  en- 
terprising attorneys  like  Messrs.  Quirk,  Gammon,  and  Snap, 
happening  to  get  hold  of  them,  and  family  papers  in  their 
possession,  had  taken  up  their  case.  When  with  impressions 
such  as  these,  Mr.  Aubrey  perused  and  reperused  the  opin- 
ions of  the  conveyancer  given  on  the  occasion  of  his  (Mr. 
Aubrey's)  marriage,  he  was  confounded  at  the  supineness 
and  indifference  which  he  had  even  twice  exhibited,  and  felt 
disposed  now  greatly  to  over  value  the  importance  of  every 
adverse  circumstance.  The  boldness  again,  and  systematic 
energy  with  which  the  case  of  the  claimant  was  prosecuted, 
and  the  eminent  legal  opinions  which  were  alleged,  and  with 
every  appearance  of  truth,  to  concur  in  his  favor,  afforded 
additional  grounds  for  rational  apprehension.  He  looked 
the  danger,  nowever,  full  in  the  face,  and  as  far  as  lay  in  his 
power,  prepared  for  the  evil  day  which  might  so  soon  come 
upon  him.  Certain  extensive  and  somewhat  costly  altera- 
tions which  he  had  been  on  the  point  of  commencing  at  Yat- 
ton,  he  abandoned.  But  for  the  earnest  interference  of 
friends,  he  would  at  once  have  given  up  his  establishment  in 
Grosvenor  Street,  and  applied  for  theChiltern  Hundreds,  in 
order  t9  retire  from  political  life.  Considering  the  possibil- 
ity of  his  soon  being  declared  the  wrongful  holder  of  trie  prop- 
erty, he  contracted  his  expenditure  as  far  as  he  could,  with- 
out challenging  unnecessary  public  attention ;  and  paid  into 
his  barker's  hands  all  his  Christmas  rents,  sacredly  resolv- 
ing to  abstain  from  drawing  out  one  farthing  of  what  might 
goon  be  proved  to  belong  to  another.  At  every  point  occur- 


TEN  THOUSAND  A-TEAE.  307 

red  the  dreadful  question— if  I  am  declared  never  to  have  been 
the  rightful  owner  of  the  property,  how  am  I  to  discharge  my 
frightful  liabilities  to  him  who  is?  Mr.  Aubrey  had  nothing 
except  the  Yatton  property.  He  had  but  an  insignificant  sum 
in  the  funds  ;  Mrs.  Aubrey's  settlement  was  out  of  lands  at. 
Yatton,  as  also  was  the  little  income  bequeathed  to  Kate  by 
her  father.  Could  anything,  now,  be  conceived  more  dread- 
ful under  these  circumstances,  than  the  mere  danger— the 
slightest  probability— of  their  being  deprived  of  Yatton  ? — 
and  with  a  debt  of  at  the  very  least  SIXTY  THOUSAND  POUNDS, 
due  to  him  who  had  been  wrongfully  kept  out  of  his  proper- 
ty ?  That  was  the  the  millstone  which  seemed  to  drag  them 
all  to  the  bottom.  Against  that,  what  could  the  kindness  of 
the  most  generous  friends,  what  could  his  own  most  desper- 
ate exertions,  avail '?  All  this  had  poor  Aubrey  constantly 
before  his  eyes,  together  with— his  wife,  his  sister,  his  chil- 
dren. What  was  to  become  of  them  ?  It  was  long  before 
the  real  nature  and  extent  of  his  danger  became  known 
amongst  his  friends  and  neighbors.  When,  however,  they 
were  made  aware  of  it,  an  extraordinary  interest  and  sym- 
pathy were  excited  throughout  almost  the  whole  county. 
Whenever  his  attorney,  Mr.  Parkinson,  appeared  in  public, 
he  was  besieged  by  most  anxious  inquiries  concerning  his 
distinguished  client,  whose  manly  modesty  and  fortitude, 
under  the  pressure  of  his  sudden  and  almost  unprecedented 
difficulty  and  peril,  endeared  him  more  than  ever  to  all  who 
had  an  opportunity  of  appreciating  his  position.  With  what 
intense  and  absorbing  interest  were  the  ensuing  assizes 
looked  for !  At  length  they  arrived. 

The  ancient  city  of  York  exhibited,  on  the  commission 
day  of  the  Spring  Assizes  for  the  year  18 — ,  the  usual  scene 
of  animation  and  excitement.  The  High  Sheriff,  attended 
by  an  imposing  retinue,  went  out  to  meet  the  Judges,  and 
escorted  them,  amidst  the  shrill  clangor  of  trumpets,  to  the 
Castle,  where  the  commission  was  opened  with  the  usual 
formalities.  The  Judges  were  Lord  Widdrington,  the  Lord 
Chief  Justice  of  the  King's  Bench,  and  Mr.  Justice  Gray  ley, 
a  puisne  judge  of  the  same  court— both  admirable  lawyer's. 
The  former  was  possessed  of  the  more  powerful  intellect. 
He  was,  what  may  be  called  a  great  scientific  lawyer,  refer- 
ring everything  to  principle  as  extracted  from  precedent. 
Mr.  Justice  Grayley  was  almost  unrivalled  in  his  knowledge 
of  the  details  of  the  law ;  his  governing  maxim  being  ita  lex 
scripta.  Here  his  knowledge  was  equally  minute  and 
accurate,  and  most  readily  applied  to  every  case  brought  be- 
fore him.  Never  sat  there  upon  the  bench  a  more  pains- 
taking judge— one  more  anxious  to  do  right  equally  in  great 
things  as  in  small.  Both  were  men  of  rigid  integrity:  'tis 
a  glorious  thing  to  be  able  to  add — when,  for  centuries,  have 
other  than  men  of  rigid  integrity  sat  upon  the  English 
Bench  ?  Lord  Widdrington,  however,  in  temper  was  stern, 


308  TEN. THOUSAND  A-YEAR. 

arbitrary,  and  overbearing,  and  his  manners  were  disfigured 
not  a  little  by  coarseness ;  while  his  companion  was  a  man  of 
exemplary  amiability,  affability,  and  forbearance.  Lord 
Widdrington  presided  at  the  Civil  Court,  (where,  of  course, 
would  come  on  the  important  cause  in  which  we  are  in- 
terested,) and  Mr.  Justice  Grayley  in  the  Criminal  Court. 

Soon  after  the  sitting  of  the  court,  on  the  ensuing  morn- 
ing— "  Will  your  Lordship  allow  me,"  rose  and  inquired  the 
sleek,  smiling,  and  portly  Mr.  Subtle,  dead  silence  prevailing 
as  soon  as  he  had  mentioned  the  name  of  the  cause  about 
which  he  was  inquiring,  "  to  call  your  attention  to  a  cause  of 
Doe  on  the  demise  of  Titmouse  v.  J~olter, — a  special  jury 
cause,  in  which  there  are  a  great  many  witnesses  to  be  ex- 
amined on  both  sides— and  to  ask  that  a  day  may  be  fixed 
for  it  to  come  on  ?  " 

"Whom  do  you  appear  for,  Mr.  Subtle?"  inquired  his 
lordship. 

"  For  the  plaintiff,  my  lord." 

"  And  who  appears  for  the  defendant?" 

"The  Attorney-General  leads  for  the  defendant,  my 
lord,"  replied  Mr.  Sterling,  who,  with  Mr.  Crystal,  was  also 
retained  for  the  defendant. 

"  Well,  perhaps  you  can  agree  between  yourselves  upon  a 
day,  and  in  the  meantime  similar  arrangements  may  be 
made  for  any  other  special  jury  causes  that  may  require  it." 
After  due  consultation,  Monday  week  was  agreed  upon  by 
the  parties,  and  fixed  by  his  lordship,  for  the  trial  of  the 
cause.  During  the  Sunday  preceding  it,  York  was  crowded 
with  persons  of  the  highest  distinction  from  all  parts  of  the 
county,  who  felt  interested  in  the  result  of  the  great  cause 
of  the  assizes.  About  mid-day  a  dusty  travelling  carriage- 
and-four  dashed  into  the  streets  from  the  London  road,  and 
drove  up  to  the  principal  inn ;  it  contained  the  Attorney- 
General  (who  just  finished  reading  his  brief  as  he  entered 
York)  and  his  clerk.  The  Attorney-General  was  a  man  of 
striking  and  highly  intellectual  countenance ;  but  he  looked 
on  alighting,  somewhat  fatigued  with  his  long  journey.  He 
was  a  man  of  extraordinary  natural  talents,  and  also  a  first- 
rate  lawyer — one  whose  right  to  take  the  woolsack,  when- 
ever it  should  become  vacant,  was  recognized  by  all  the  pro- 
fession. His  professional  celebrity,  and  his  coming  down 
special  on  the  present  occasion,  added  to  the  circumstance 
of  his  being  well-known  to  be  a  personal  friend  of  his  client, 
Mr.  Aubrey— whence  it  might  be  inferred  that  his  great 
powers  would  be  exerted  to  their  utmost— was  well  calculated 
to  enhance  the  interest,  if  that  were  possible,  of  the  occasion 
which  had  brought  him  down  at  so  great  an  expense,  and  to 
sustain  so  heavy  a  responsibility  as  the  conduct  of  a  cause  of 
such  magnitude. 

He  came  to  lead  against  a  formidable  opponent.  Mr. 
SUBTJJE  was  the  leader  of  the  Northern  circuit,  a  man  of 


TEN  THOUSAND  A-YEAR.  809 

matchless  tact  and  practical  sagacity,  and  most  consum- 
mately skilful  in  the  conduct  of  a  cause.  The  only  thing  he 
ever  looked  at  was  the  verdict,  to  the  gaining  of  which  he 
directed  all  his  energies,  and  sacrificed  every  other  con- 
sideration. As  for  display,  he  despised  it.  A  speech,  as  such, 
was  his  aversion.  He  entered  into  a  friendly,  but  exquisitely 
crafty  conversation  with  the  jury;  for  he  was  so  quick 
at  perceiving  the  effect  of  his  address  on  the  mind  of  each  of 
the  twelve,  and  dexterous  in  accommodating  himself  to  what 
he  detected  to  be  the  passing  mood  of  each,  that  they  felt  as 
if  they  were  all  the  while  reasoning  with,  and  being  con- 
vinced by  him.  His  placid,  handsome,  smiling  countenance, 
his  gentlemanly  bearing  and  insinuating  address,  full  of 
good-natured  cheerful  confidence  in  his  cause,  were  irre- 
sistible. He  flattered,  he  soothed,  he  fascinated  the  jury, 
producing  an  impression  upon  their  minds  which  they 
often  felt  indignant  at  his  opponent  attempting  to  efface.  In 
fact,  as  a  nisi  prius  leader  he  was  unrivalled,  as  well  in 
stating  as  in  arguing  a  case,  as  well  in  examining  as  cross- 
examining  a  witness.  It  required  no  little  practical  skill  to 
form  an  adequate  estimate  of  Mr.  Subtle's  skill  in  the 
management  of  a  cause  ;  for  he  did  everything  with  such  a 
smiling,  careless,  unconcerned  air,  in  the  great  pinch  and 
and  strain  of  a  case,  equally  as  in  the  pettiest  details,  that 
you  Avould  be  apt  to  suspect  that  none  but  the  easiest  and 
most  straightforward  cases  fell  to  his  lot. 

Titmouse,  Titmouse,  methinks  the  fates  favored  you  in 
assigning  to  you  Mr.  Subtle  ! 

Next  came  Mr.  QUICKSILVER,  a  man  of  great  but  wild 
energy,  who  received  what  may  be  called  a  muffling  retainer. 
What  a  contrast  was  he  to  Mr.  Subtle !  The  first  and  the 
last  thing  he  thought  of  in  a  cause,  was— himself.  His  de- 
light was  to  make  the  jury  feel  as  if  a  whirlwind  were  rag- 
ing about  them  and  he  the  spirit  who  had  raised  it.  His 
object  was  either  to  dazzle  or  overpower  them.  He  wrapped 
himself  round  in  the  gleaming  garment  of  display;  the 
gaudy  patchwork  of  multifarious  superficial  acquirements. 
This  was  the  strange,  noisy  object,  flinging  about  wildly,  in 
all  directions,  the  firebrands  and  arrows  of  sarcasm  and 
invective,  which  occupied  their  eye  and  ear  till  he  had 
ceased ;  neither  he  nor  they  were  thinking  all  the  while  of 
his  dismayed  and  injured  client,  till  reminded  of  him  by  the 
adverse  charge  of  the  judge,  accompanied  by  a  slight  sneer 
and  shrug  of  the  shoulders  from  Mr.  Subtle.  Why,  then, 
was  such  a  man  retained  in  the  cause?  'Twas  a  fancy  of 
Quirk's,  a  vast  political  admirer  of  Quicksilver's,  who  had 
made  one  or  two  most  splendid  speeches  for  him  m  libel 
cases  brought  against  the  Sunday  Flash.  Gammon  most 
earnestly  expostulated,  but  Quirk  was  inexorable ;  and  him- 
self carried  his  retainer  to  Mr.  Quicksilver.  Gammon,  how. 
ever,  was  somewhat  consoled  by  the  reflection,  that 


310  TEN  THOUSAND  A-YEAK. 

wild  elephant  would  be,  in  a  manner,  held  in  check  by  Mr. 
Subtle  and  Mr.  Lynx,  who,  he  hoped,  would  prevent  any 
serious  mischief  from  happening.  Lynx  possessed  the 
qualities  which  his  name  would  suggest  to  you.  I  have 
partly  described  him  already.  He  was  a  man  of  minute 
accuracy ;  and  "  got  up  "  every  case  in  which  he  was  en- 
gaged as  if  his  life  had  depended  on  the  result.  Nothing 
escaped  him.  He  kept  his  mind  constantly  even  with  the 
current  of  the  cause.  He  was  a  man  to  steer  a  leader,  if  ever 
that  leader  should  get,  for  an  instant,  on  the  wrong  tack,  or 
be  uncertain  as  to  his  course.  His  suggestion  and  inter- 
ference—rare, indeed,  with  such  a  man  as  Mr.  Subtle,  in- 
cessant with  Mr.  Quicksilver—  -were  always  worth  attending 
to,  and  consequently  received  with  deference. 

For  Mr.  Aubrey  also  was  retained  a  formidable  bar.  Mr. 
Attorney-General  was  a  man  much  superior,  in  point  of  in- 
tellect and  legal  knowledge,  to  Mr.  Subtle.  His  mind  was 
distinguished  by  its  tranquil  power.  He  had  a  rare  and 
invaluable  faculty  of  arraying  before  his  mind's  eye  all  the 
facts  and  bearings  of  the  most  intricate  case,  and  contemplat- 
ing them,  as  it  were,  not  successively,  but  simultaneously. 
His  perception  was  quick  as  light ;  and,  at  the  same  time- 
rare,  most  rare  accompaniment !— his  judgment  sound,  his 
memory  signally  retentive.  Inferior,  possibly,  to  Mr.  Subtle 
in  rapid  and  delicate  appreciation  of  momentary  advantages, 
he  was  sagacious  where  Mr.  Subtle  was  only  ingenious. 
Mr.  Attorney-General  had  as  much  weight  with  the  judge  as 
Mr.  Subtle  with  the  jury.  With  the  former,  there  was  a 
candor  and  straightforwardness— a  dignified  simplicity— 
which  insensibly  won  the  confidence  of  the  judge ;  who,  on 
the  other  hand,  felt  himself  obliged  to  be  ever  on  his  guard 
against  the  slippery  sophistries  of  Mr.  Subtle,  whom  he  thus 
got  to  regard  with  constant  suspicion. 

Mr.  STERLING,  the  second  counsel  for  the  defendant,  was  a 
king's  counsel,  and  a  rival  of  Mr.  Subtle  upon  the  circuit. 
He  was  a  man  of  great  power ;  and,  on  important  occasions, 
no  man  at  the  bar  could  acquit  himself  with  more  distinc- 
tion. As  a  speaker,  he  was  eloquent  and  impressive,  per- 
haps deficient  in  vivacity ;  but  he  was  a  man  of  clear  and 
powerful  intellect ;  prompt  in  seizing  the  bearings  of  a  case ; 
a  capital  lawyer ;  and  possessing,  even  on  the  most  trying 
occasions,  imperturbable  self-possession. 

Mr.  CRYSTAL,  with  some  faults  of  manner  and  bearing,  was 
an  honorable  high-minded  man;  clear-sighted  and  strong- 
headed  ;  an  accurate  and  ready  lawyer ;  vigilant  and  acute. 

See,  then,  the  combatants  in  this  memorable  encounter: 
for  Titmouse— Mr.  SUBTLE,  Mr.  QUICKSILVER,  Mr.  LYNX  ;  f or 
Mr.  Aiibrey — Mr.  ATTORNEY-GENERAL,  MR.  STERLING,  MR, 
CRYSTAL. 

The  consultation  of  each  party  was  long  and  anxious. 

About  eight  o'clock  on  the  Sunday  evening,  at  Mr.  Subtle's 


TEN  THOUSAND  A-YKAR.  SH 

lodgings.  Messrs.  Quirk,  Gammon,  and  Snap,  accompanied 
by  Mr.  Mortmain,  whom  they  had  brought  down  to  watch 
the  case,  made  their  appearance  shortly  after  Mr.  Quicksilver 
and  Mr.  Lynx. 

"  Our  case  seems  complete,  now?  said  Mr.  Subtle,  casting 
a  penetrating  and  most  significant  glance  at  Messrs.  Quirk 
and  Gammon,  and  then  at  his  juniors,  to  whom,  before  the 
arrival  of  their  clients  and  Mr.  Mortmain,  he  had  been  men- 
tioning the  essential  link  which,  a  month  before,  he  had 
pointed  out  as  missing,  and  the  marvellous  good-fortune  by 
which  they  had  been  able  to  supply  it  at  the  eleventh  hour. 

"That  tombstone's  a  godsend,  Subtle,  isn't  it?"  said 
Quicksilver,  with  a  grim  smile.  Lynx  neither  smiled  nor 
spoke.  He  was  a  very  matter-of-fact  person.  So  as  the  case 
came  out  clear  and  nice  in  court,  he  cared  about  nothing 
more.  But  whatever  might  be  the  insinuation  or  suspicion 
implied  in  the  observation  of  Mr.  Subtle,  the  reader  must,  by 
this  time,  be  well  aware  how  little  it  was  warranted  by  the 
facts. 

"  I  shall  open  it  very  quietly,"  said  Mr.  Subtle,  putting  into 
his  pocket  his  penknife,  with  which  he  had  been  paring  his 
nails,  while  Mr.  Quicksilver  had  been  talking  very  fast. 
"  Wnat  do  you  think,  Mr.  Lynx?  Had  I  better  allude  boldly 
to  the  conveyance  executed  by  Harry  Dreddlington,  and 
which  becomes  useless  as  soon  as  we  prove  his  death  in  his 
father's  lifetime  ?  " 

"Ah!  there's  that  blessed  tombstone  again,"  interposed 
Quicksilver. 

— "  Or,"  resumed  Mr.  Subtle,  "  content  myself  with  barely 
making  out  our  pedigree,  and  let  it  come  from  the  other 
side  ?  " 

"  I  think,  perhaps,  that  the  latter  would  be  the  quieter  and 
safer  course,"  replied  Lynx. 

"  By  the  way,  gentlemen,"  said  Mr.  Subtle,  suddenly,  ad- 
dressing Messrs.  Quirk,  Gammon,  and  Snap,  "how  do  we 
come  to  know  anything  about  the  mortgage  executed  by 
Harry  Dreddlington ! " 

"  Oh !  that,  you  know,"  replied  Quirk,  quickly,  "  we  first 

got  scent  of  in  Mr. "  Here  he  paused  suddenly,  and 

turned  quite  red. 

"  It  was  suggested,"  said  Gammon,  calmly,  "  by  one  of  the 
gentlemen  whose  opinions  we  have  taken  in  the  case — I  for- 
get by  whom— that,  from  some  recital,  it  was  probable  that 
there  existed  such  an  instrument ;  and  that  put  us  on  mak- 
ing inquiry." 

"  Nothing  more  likely,"  added  Mortmain,  "  than  that  it,  or 
an  abstract,  or  minute  of  it,  should  get  into  Stephen  Dred- 
dlington's  hands." 

"Ah!  well!  well!— I  must  say  there's  rather  an  air  of 
mystery  about  the  case.  But— about  that  tombstone— what 
sort  of  witnesses  will  speak " 


312  TEN  THOUSAND  A-YEAR. 

"  Will  that  evidence  be  requisite,"  inquired  Lynx,  "  in  the 
plaintiff's  case?  All  we  shall  have  to  do,  will  be  to  prove 
the  fact  that  Harry  died  without  issue,  of  which  there's  satis- 
factory evidence ;  and  as  to  the  time  of  his  death,  that  will 
become  material  only  if  they  put  in  the  conveyance  of 
Harry." 

"  True— true ;  ah !  I'll  turn  that  over  in  my  mind.  Rely 
upon  it,  I'll  give  Mr.  Attorney-General  as  little  to  lay  hold 
of  as  possible.  Thank  you,  Mr.  Lynx,  for  the  hint.  Now, 
gentlemen,  one  other  question— What  Kind  of  looking  people 
are  the  witnesses  who  prove  the  latter  steps  of  the  pedigree 
of  Mr.  Titmouse?  Respectable  ?  eh  ?— You  know  a  good  deal 
will  depend  on  the  credit  they  may  obtain  with  the  jury." 

"  They're  very  decent  creditable  persons,  you  will  find, 
sir,"  said  Gammon. 

"  Good,  good.    Who  struck  the  special  jury  ?" 

"  We  did,  sir." 

"  Well,  I  must  say  that  was  a  very  prudent  step  for  you  to 
take !  considering  the  rank  in  life  and  circumstances  of  the 
respective  parties !  However,  to  be  sure,  if  you  didn't,  they 
would— so— well ;  good-night,  gentlemen,  good-night."  So 
the  consultation  broke  up ;  and  Messrs.  Quirk,  Gammon, 
and  Snap  returned  home  to  their  inn,  in  a  very  serious  and 
anxious  mood. 

'You're  a  marvellous  prudent  person,  Mr.  Quirk,"  said 
Gammon,  in  a  somewhat  fierce  Avhisper,  as  they  walked 
along,  "  I  suppose  you  would  have  gone  on  to  explain  the 
little  matter  of  Steggars,  and  so  have  had  our  briefs  thrown 
at  our  heads " 

"  Well,  well,  that  was  a  slip."  Here  they  reached  their 
inn.  Titmouse  was  staying  there ;  and  in  Messrs.  Quirk, 
Gammon,  and  Snap's  absence,  he  nad  got  very  drunk,  and 
quarrelling  under  the  archway  with  Boots ;  so  they  ordered 
him  to  bed,  they  themselves  sitting  up  till  a  very  late  hour 
in  the  morning. 

The  consultation  at  the  Attorney-General's  had  taken 
place  about  three  o'clock  in  the  afternoon,  within  an  hour 
after  his  arrival  ;  and  had  been  attended  by  Messrs.  Sterling 
Crystal,  and  Mansfield,— by  Mr.  Runnington,  and  Mr.  Park- 
inson, and  by  Mr.  Aubrey,  whom  the  Attorney-General  re- 
ceived with  the  most  earnest  expressions  of  sympathy  and 
friendship ;  listening  to  every  question  and  every  observa- 
tion of  his  with  the  utmost  deference. 

"  It  would  be  both  idle  and  unkind  to  disguise  from  you, 
Aubrey,"  said  he,  "  that  our  position  is  somewhat  precarious. 
It  depends  entirely  on  the  chance  we  may  have  of  breaking 
down  the  plaintiffs  case  ;  for  we  have  but  a  slender  case  of 
our  own.  I  suppose  they  can  bring  proof  of  the  death  of 
Harry  Dreddington  in  his  father's  lifetime  ?  " 

"  Oh  yes,  sir ! "  answered  Mr.  Parkinson,  "  there  is  an  old 
tombstone  behind  Yatton  church  which  establishes  that  fact 


TEN  THOUSAND  A-TEAR.  313 

beyond  all  doubt ;  and  a  week  or  two  ago  no  fewer  than  five 
or  six  persons  have  been  carefully  inspecting  it ;  doubtless 
they  will  be  called  as  witnesses  to-morrow." 

"  I  feared  as  much.  Then  are  ours  no  more  than  watching 
briefs.  Depend  upon  it,  they  would  not  have  carried  on  the 
affair  with  so  high  a  hand,  if  they  had  not  pretty  firm  ground 
under  foot !  Messrs.  Quirk,  Gammon,  and  Snap  are  tolerably 
well  known  in  town— not  oyer-scrupulous,  eh,  Mr.  Running- 
ton?" 

"  Indeed,  Mr.  Attorney,  you  are  right.  I  don't  doubt  they 
are  prepared  to  go  all  lengths." 

"  well,  we'll  sift  their  evidence  pretty  closely,  at  any  rate. 
So  you  really  have  reason  to  fear,  as  you  intimated  when 
you  entered  the  room,  that  they  have  valid  evidence  of 
Stephen  Dreddlington  haying  left  issue  ?" 

"Mr.  Snap  told  me,"  said  Mr.  Parkinson,  "this  morning, 
that  they  would  prove  issue  of  Stephen  Dreddlington,  and 
issue  of  that  issue,  as  clean  as  a  whistle— that  was  his 
phrase." 

"  We  mustn't  take  all  for  gospel  that  he  would  say." 

"  They've  got  two  houses  filled  with  witnesses,  I  under- 
stand," said  Mr.  Runnington. 

"  Do  they  seem  Yorkshire  people,  or  strangers  ?  " 

"  Why,  most  of  them  that  I  have  seen,"  replied  Parkinson, 
"seem  strangers." 

"  Ah,  they  will  prove,  I  suppose,  the  later  steps  of  the 
pedigree,  Avhen  Stephen  Dreddlington  married  at  a  distance 
from  his  native  county." 

They  then  entered  into  a  very  full  and  minute  examina- 
tion of  the  case  ;  after  which, — "  Well,"  said  the  Attorney- 
General,  evidently  fatigued  with  his  long  journey,  and  rising 
from  his  chair,  "we  must  trust  to  what  will  turn  up  in  the 
chapter  of  accidents  to-morrow.  I  shall  be  expected  to  dine 
with  the  bar  to-day,"  he  added ;  "  but  immediately  after  din- 
ner—say at  seven  o'clock,  I  shall  be  here,  and  at  your  ser- 
vice, if  anything  should  be  required."  Then  the  consultation 
broke  up.  Mr.  Aubrey  had,  at  their  earnest  entreaty, 
brought  Mrs.  Aubrey  and  Kate  from  Yatton,  on  Saturday ; 
for  they  declared  themselves  unable  to  bear  the  dreadful 
suspense  in  which  they  should  be  left  at  Yatton.  Yielding, 
therefore,  to  these  their  very  reasonable  wishes,  he  had  en- 
gaged private  lodgings  at  the  outskirts  of  the  town.  On 
quitting  the  consultation,  which,  without  at  the  same  time 
affecting  over-strictness,  he  had  regretted  being  fixed  for 
Sunday — but  the  necessity  of  the  case  appeared  to  warrant  it 
—he  repaired  to  the  magnificent  MINSTER,  where  the  evening 
prayers  were  being  read,  and  where  were  Mrs.  Aubrey  and 
Kate.  They^  were  chanting  the  prayers  as  he  entered,  and 
was  placed  in  a  stall  nearly  opposite  to  where  those  whom 
he  loved  so  fondly  were  standing.  The  psalms  allotted  for 
the  evening  were  those  in  which  the  royal  sufferer,  David, 


314  TEN  THOUSAND  A-YEAE. 

was  pouring  forth  the  deepest  sorrows  of  his  heart ;  and 
their  appropriateness  to  his  own  state  of  mind,  added  to 
the  effect  produced  by  the  melting  melody  in  which  they 
were  conveyed  to  his  ears,  excited  in  him,  and,  he  perceived, 
also  in  those  opposite,  the  deepest  emotion.  The  glorious 
pile  was  beginning  to  grow  dusky  with  the  stealing  shadows 
of  evening ;  and  the  solemn  and  sublime  strains  of  the  organ, 
during  the  playing  of  the  anthem,  filled  the  minds  of  all 
present  who  had  any  pretentious  to  sensibility,  with  mingled 
feelings  of  tenderness  and  awe.  Those  in  whom  we  are  so 
deeply  interested,  felt  their  minds  at  once  subdued  and  ele- 
vated ;  and  as  they  quitted  the  darkening  fabric,  through 
which  the  pealing  tones  of  the  organ  were  yet  reverberating, 
they  could  not  help  inquiring,  Should  they  ever  enter  it 
again,— and  in  what  altered  circumstances  might  it  be? 

To  return,  however — though  it  is,  indeed,  like  descending 
from  the  holy  mountain  into  the  bustle  and  hubbub  of  the 
city  at  its  foot — Mr.  Parkinson,  being  most  unexpectedly 
and  unfortunately  summoned  to  Grilston  that  afternoon,  in 
order  to  send  up  some  deeds  of  one  of  his  distinguished 
clients  to  London,  for  the  purpose  of  immediately  effecting 
a  mortgage,  set  off  in  a  post-chaise,  at  top  speed,  in  a  very 
unenviable  frame  of  mind  ;  and  by  seven  o'clock  was  seated 
in  his  office  at  Grilston,  busily  turning  over  a  great  number 
of  deeds  and  papers,  in  a  large  tin-case,  with  the  words 
"  Right  Honorable  the  Earl  of  Yelverton,"  painted  on  the 
outside.  Having  turned  over  almost  everything  inside,  and 
found  all  that  he  wanted,  he  was  going  to  toss  back  again 
all  the  deeds  which  were  not  requisite  for  his  immediate 
purpose,  when  he  happened  to  see  one  lying  at  the  very  bot- 
tom, which  he  had  not  before  observed.  It  was  not  a  large, 
but  an  old  deed— and  he  took  it  up  and  hastily  examined  it. 

We  have  seen  a  piece  of  unexpected  good  fortune  on  the 
part  of  Gammon  and  his  client ;  and  the  reader  will  not  be 
disappointed  at  finding  something  of  a  similar  kind  befalling 
Mr.  Aubrey,  even  at  the  eleventh  hour.  Mr.  Parkinson's 
iourney,  which  he  had  execrated  a  hundred  times  over,  as 
he  came  down,  produced  a  discovery  which  made  him 
tremble  all  over  with  agitation  and  excitement,  and  begin 
to  look  ur>on  it  as  almost  owing  to  an  interference  of  Provi- 
dence. The  deed  he  looked  at  bore  an  endorsement  of  the 
name  of  "  Dreddlington"  After  a  hasty  glance  over  its 
contents,  he  tried  to  recollect  by  what  accident  a  document 
belonging  to  Mr.  Aubrey  could  have  found  its  way  into  the 
box  containing  Lord  Yelverton's  deeds  ;  and  it  at  length  oc- 
curred to  him  that,  about  a  twelvemonth  before,  Mr. 
Aubrey  had  proposed  advancing  several  thousand  pounds  to 
Lord  Yelverton,  on  mortgage  of  a  portion  of  his  lordship's 
property — but  which  negotiation  had  afterwards  been 
broken  off;  that  Mr.  Aubrey's  title-deeds  happened  to  be  at 
the  same  tune  open  and  loose  in  his  office— and  he  recollect- 


TEN  THOUSAND  A-YEAE.  315 

ed  having  considerable  trouble  in  separating  the  respective 
documents  which  had  got  mixed  together.  This  one,  after 
all,  had  been  by  some  accident  overlooked,  till  it  turned  up 
in  this  most  timely  and  extraordinary  manner!  Having 
hastily  effected  the  object  which  had  brought  him  back  to 
Grilston,  he  ordered  a  post-chaise  and  four,  and  within  a 
quarter-of-an-hour  was  thundering  back,  at  top-speed,  on  his 
way  to  York,  which,  the  horses  reeking  and  foaming,  he 
reached  a  little  after  ten  o'clock.  He  jumped  put,  \vith  the 
precious  deed  in  his  pocket,  the  instant  that  his  chaise-door 
was  opened,  and  ran  off,  without  saying  more  than — "  I'm 
gone  to  the  Attorney-General's."  This  was  heard  by  many 
passers-by  and  persons  standing  round ;  and  it  spread  far 
and  wide  that  something  of  the  utmost  importance  had 
transpired,  with  reference  to  the  great  ejectment  cause  of 
Mr.  Aubrey.  Soon  afterwards,  messengers  and  clerks,  be- 
longing to  Mr.  Runningtoii  and  Mr.  Parkinson,  were  to  be 
seen  running  to  and  fro,  summoning  Mr.  Sterling,  Mr.  Crys- 
tal, Mr.  Mansfield,  and  also  Mr.  Aubrey,  to  a  second  consul- 
tation at  the  Attorney-General's.  About  eleven  o'clock  they 
were  all  assembled.  The  deed  which  had  occasioned  all  this 
excitement  was  one  calculated  indeed  to  produce  that  effect : 
and  it  filled  the  minds  of  all  present  with  astonishment  and 
delight.  In  a  word,  it  was  a  deed  of  confirmation  by  old 
Dreddlington,  the  father  of  Harry  Dreddlington,  of  the  con- 
veyance by  the  latter  to  Geoffry  Dreddlington,  who,  in  the 
manner  already  mentioned  to  the  reader,  had  got  an  assign- 
ment of  that  conveyance  to  himself.  After  the  Attorney- 
General  had  satisfied  himself  as  to  the  account  to  be  given 
of  the  deed— the  custody  from  whence  it  came,  namely,  the 
attorney  for  the  defendant ;  Mr.  Parkinson  undertaking  to 
swear,  without  any  hesitation,  that  whatever  deeds  of  Mr. 
Aubrey's  he  possessed,  he  had  taken  from  the  muniment- 
room  at  Yatton — the  second  consultation  broke  up.  Mr. 
Aubrey,  on  hearing  the  nature  and  effect  of  the  instrument 
explained  by  the  Attorney-General  and  Mr.  Mansfield,  and 
all  his  counsel,  in  short,  concurring  in  opinion  as  to  the  tri- 
umphant effect  which  this  instrument  would  produce  on  the 
morrow,  may  be  pardoned  for  regarding  it,  in  the  excite- 
ment of  the  moment,  as  almost  a  direct  interference  of 
Providence. 

A  few  minutes  before  nine  o'clock  on  the  ensuing  morn- 
ing, the  occasional  shrill  blasts  of  the  trumpets  announced 
that  the  judges  were  on  their  way  to  the  castle,  the  ap- 
proaches to  which  were  crowded  with  carriages  and  pedes- 
trians of  a  highly  respectable  appearance.  As  the  castle 
clock  finished  striking  nine,  Lord  Widdrington  took  his 
seat,  and  the  swearing  of  the  special  Jury  commenced. 
The  court  was  crowded  almost  to  suffocation ;  all  the 
chief  places  being  filled  with  persons  of  distinction  in 
the  county.  The  benches  on  each  side  of  the  judge 


316  TEN  THOUSAND  A-TEAE. 

were  occupied  by  ladies,  who — especially  the  Countess  of  Old- 
acre  and  Lady  De  la  Zouch— evinced  a  painful  degree  of 
anxiety  and  excitement  in  their  countenances  and  demeanor. 
The  bar  also  mustered  in  great  force ;  the  crown  court  being 
quite  deserted,  although  a  great  murder  case  was  going  on 
there.  The  civil  court  was  on  the  present  occasion  the  point 
of  attraction,  not  only  on  account  of  the  interesting  nature 
Jof  the  case  to  be  tried,  but  of  the  keen  contest  that  was  ex- 
'•  pected  between  the  Attorney-General  and  Mr.  Subtle.  The 
former,  as  he  entered — his  commanding  features  gazed  at  by 
many  an  anxious  eye  with  hope,  and  a  feeling  that  on  his 
skill  and  learning  depended  that  day  the  destination  of  the 
Yatton  property— bowed  to  the  judge,  and  then  nodded  and 
shook  hands  with  several  of  the  counsel  nearest  to  him ;  then 
he  sat  down,  and  opening  his  bag,  took  out  his  huge  brief, 
and  began  turning  over  its  leaves  with  a  calm  and  attentive 
air,  occasionally  turning  round  and  conversing  with  his  juni- 
ors. Every  one  present  observed  that  the  defendant's  counsel 
and  attorneys  wore  the  confident  looks  of  winning  men ; 
while  their  opponents,  quick-sighted  enough,  also  observed 
the  circumstance,  and  looked,  on  that  account  alone,  a  shade 
more  anxious  than  when  they  had  entered  the  court.  Mr. 
Subtle  requested  Gammon,  whose  ability  he  had  soon  detect- 
ed, to  sit  immediately  beneath  him ;  next  to  Gammon  sat 
Quirk,  then  Snap,  and  beside  him  Mr.  Titmouse,  with  a  star- 
ing sky-blue  flowered  silk  handkerchief  round  his  neck,  a 
gaudy  waistcoat,  a  tight  surtout,  and  white  kid  gloves.  He 
looked  exceedingly  pale,  and  dared  hardly  interchange  a 
word  with  even  Snap,  who  was  just  as  irritable  and  excited 
as  his  senior  partners.  It  was  quickly  known  all  over  the 
court  who  Titmouse  was.  Mr.  Aubrey  scarcely  showed  him- 
self in  court  all  day,  though  he  stood  at  the  door  near  the 
bench,  and  could  hear  all  that  passed ;  Lord  De  la  Zouch  and 
one  or  two  personal  friends  standing  with  him,  engaged,  from 
time  to  time,  in  anxious  conversation. 

The  jury  having  been  sworn,  Mr.  Lynx  rose,  and  in  a  few 
hurried  sentences,  to  the  lay  audience  utterly  unintelligible. 
( intimated  the  nature  of  the  pleadings  in  the  cause.  The  At- 
'  torney-General  then  rose,  and  requested  that  all  the  witnesses 
might  leave  the  court.  As  soon  as  the  little  disturbance  oc- 
casioned by  this  move  had  ceased,  Mr.  Subtle  rose,  and  in  a 
low  but  distinct  tone  said,  "  May  it  please  your  Lordship — 
Gentlemen  of  the  Jury,— In  this  cause  I  have  the  honor  to 
appear  before  you  as  counsel  for  the  plaintiff ;  and  it  now  be- 
comes my  duty  to  state  as  briefly  as  I  can,  the  nature  of  his 
case.  It  is  impossible,  gentlemen,  not  to  notice  the  unusual 
interest  excited  by  the  cause ;  and  which  may  be  accounted 
for  by  the  very  large  estates  in  this  county  which  are  sought 
this  day  to  be  transferred  to  a  comparative  stranger,  from 
the  family  who  have  long  enjoyed  them,  and  of  whom  I  am 
anxious  to  say  everything  respectful ;  for  you  will  very  soon 


TEN  THOUSAND  A-YEAB.  317 

find  that  the  name  on  the  record  is  that  of  only  the  nominal 
defendant ;  and  although  all  that  is  professed  to  be  this  day 
sought  for,  is  a  very  trifling  portion  of  the  property,  your  ver- 
dict will  undoubtedly  decide  the  question  as  to  the  true  own- 
ership and  enjoyment  of  the  large  estates  now  held  by  the 
gentleman  who  is  the  substantial  defendant— I  mean  Mr. 
Aubrey,  the  member  of  parliament  for  the  borough  of  Yat- 
ton."  Aware  of  the  watchful  and  formidable  opponent  who 
would  in  due  time  answer  him,  and  also  of  being  himself  en- 
titled to  the  general  reply — to  the  last  word— Mr.  Subtle  pro- 
ceeded to  state  the  nature  of  the  plaintiff's  case  with  the 
utmost  brevity  and  clearness.  Scarcely  any  sound  was  heard 
but  that  of  the  pens  of  the  shorthand  writers,  and  of  the 
counsel  taking  their  notes.  Mr.  Subtle,  having  handed  up 
two  or  three  copies  of  the  pedigree  which  he  held  in  his  hand 
to  the  judge  and  jury,  pointed  out  with  distinctness  and  pre- 
cision every  link  in  the  chain  of  evidence  which  he  intended 
to  lay  before  the  jury ;  and  having  done  this — having  pre- 
sented as  few  salient  points  of  attack  to  his  opponent  as  he 
possibly  could — he  sat  down,  professing  his  entire  ignorance 
of  what  case  could  be  set  up  in  answer  to  that  which  he  had 
opened.  lie  had  not  been  on  his  legs  quite  half-an-hour  ;  and 
when  he  ceased— how  he  had  disappointed  every  one  present, 
except  the  judge  and  the  bar !  Instead  of  a  speech  befitting 
so  great  an  occasion — impressive  and  eloquent — here  had  been 
a  brief  dry  statement  of  a  few  uninteresting  facts — dates, 
births,  deaths,  marriages,  registers,  entries,  inscriptions, 
deeds,  wills— without  a  single  touch  of  feeling  or  ray  of  elo- 
quence. The  momentary  feeling  of  disappointment  in  the 
audience,  however— almost  all  of  whom,  it  may  easily  be  be- 
lieved, were  in  the  interest  of  the  Aubreys— quickly  yielded 
to  one  of  satisfaction  and  relief ;  as  they  thought  they  might 
regard  so  meagre  a  speech  as  heralding  in  as  meagre  a  case. 
As  soon  as  he  sat  down,  Mr.  Quicksilver  rose  and  called  the 
first  witness.  "  We're  safe !  "  said  the  Attorney-General  to 
Mr.  Stirling  and  Mr.  Crystal,  with  his  hand  before  his  mouth, 
and  with  the  very  faintest  whisper  that  could  be  audible  to 
those  whom  he  addressed;  and  the  witness  haying  been 
sworn,  they  all  resumed  their  seats  and  their  writing.  The 
first  and  the  subsequent  witness  established  one  or  two  pre- 
liminary and  formal  points— the  Attorney-General  scarcely 
rising  to  put  a  question  to  them.  The  third  witness  was  ex- 
amined by  Mr.  Subtle  with  apparent  unconcern,  but  really 
with  exquisite  anxiety.  From  the  earnestness  and  attention 
with  which  the  words  of  the  witness  were  watched  and  taken 
down  by  both  the  iudge  and  the  counsel,  who  knew  much 
better  than  the  audience  where  the  strain  of  the  case  com- 
menced, it  must  have  appeared  to  the  latter,  that  either  Mr. 
Subtle  underestimated,  or  his  opponents  overestimated,  the 
value  of  the  evidence  now  in  process  of  being  extracted  by 


318  TEN  THOUSAND  A-TEAR. 

Mr.  Subtle,  in  short,  easy,  pointed  questions,  and  with  a 
smiling  unconcerned  countenance. 

"  Not  so  fast,  sir,"  gruffly  interposed  Lord  Widdrington, 
addressing  the  witness. 

"  Take  time,  Mr.  Jones,"  said  Mr.  Subtle  blandly,  fearful 
of  ruffling  or  discomposing  an  important  witness.  The  At- 
torney-General rose  to  cross-examine  ;  pressed  him  quietly 
but  closely ;  varied  the  shape  of  his  questions ;  now  he  sooth- 
ed, then  he  startled  by  his  sternness ;  but  sat  down,  evidently 
having  produced  no  impression.  Thus  it  was  with  one  or  two 
succeeding  witnesses;  the  Attorney-General,  on  each  occa- 
sion, resuming  his  seat  after  his  abortive  efforts,  with  per- 
fect composure.  At  length,  however,  by  a  very  admirable 
and  well-sustained  fire  of  cross-questioning,  he  completely 
demolished  a  material  witness ;  and  the  hopes  of  all  inter- 
ested in  behalf  of  his  clients  rose  high.  Mr.  Subtle,  who  had 
been  all  the  while  paring  his  nails,  and  from  time  to  time 
smiling  with  a  careless  air,  (though  you  might  as  safely  have 
touched  a  tigress  suckling  her  cub's,  as  attempted  at  that 
moment  to  disturb  him,  so  absorbed  was  he  with  intense 
anxiety,)  believing  that  he  could  establish  the  same  facts  by 
another  and,  as  he  believed,  a  better  witness,  did  not  re-ex- 
amine ;  but  calling  that  other,  with  an  air  of  nonchalance, 
succeeded  in  extracting  from  him  all  that  the  other  had 
failed  in,  and  in  baffling  all  the  attempts  of  the  Attorney- 
General  to  affect  his  credit,  or  disturb  nis  equanimity.  At 
length,  another  witness  being  in  the  box,— 

"  My  Lord,  I  object  to  that  question,"  said  Mr.  Attorney- 
General,  as  Mr.  Subtle,  amidst  many  indifferent  and  appar- 
ently irrelevant  questions,  quietly  slipped  in  one  of  the  great- 
est possible  importance,  had  it  being  answered  as  he  desired. 
'Twas  quite  delightful  to  see  the  Attorney-General  and  his 
experienced  and  watchful  juniors,  all  rise  at  one  and  the  same 
instant ;  showing  how  vain  were  the  tricks  and  ingenuity  of 
their  sly  opponent.  Mr.  Attorney-General  stated  his  objec- 
tion briefly  and  pointedly ;  Mr.  Subtle  answered  him,  fol- 
lowed by  Quicksilver  and  Lynx;  and  then  Mr.  Attorney- 
General  replied,  with  great  force  and  clearness.  This  keen 
encounter  of  their  wits  over — 

"  I  shall  allow  the  question  to  be  put,"  said  Lord  Widdring- 
ton, after  a  pause—"  But  I  have  great  doubts  as  to  its  pro- 
priety. I  will  therefore  take  a  note  of  Mr.  Attorney-General's 
objection." 

Four  or  five  similar  conflicts  arose  during  the  course  of 
the  plaintiff's  case ;— now  concerning  the  competency  of  a 
witness— then  as  to  the  admissibility  of  a  document,  or  the 
propriety  of  a  particular  question.  On  each  of  these  occa- 
sions there  were  displayed  on  both  sides  consummate  logical 
skill  and  acuteness,  especially  by  the  two  leaders.  Distinc- 
tions the  most  delicate  and  subtle  were  suggested  with  sud- 
denness, and  as  promptly  encountered ;  the  most  artful  ma- 


TEN  THOUSAND  A-YEAR.  319 

noeuvres  to  secure  dangerous  admissions  resorted  to,  and 
baffled  j  the  more  recondite  principles  of  evidence  brought  to 
bear  with  admirable  readiness  on  both  sides.  To  deal  with 
them,  required  indeed  the  practised,  penetrating,  and  power- 
ful intellect  of  Lord  Widdrington.  Some  points  he  disposed 
of  promptly,  to  the  satisfaction  of  both  parties ;  on  others 
he  nesitated,  and  at  length  reserved  them.  Though  none  but 
the  more  experienced  and  able  members  of  the  bar  could  in 
the  least  degree  enter  into  and  appreciate  the  nature  of  these 
conflicts,  they  were  watched  with  untiring  attention  and 
eagerness  by  all  present,  both  ladies  and  gentlemen — by  the 
lowly  and  the  distinguished.  And  though  the  intensity  of 
the  feelings  of  all  was  manifest  by  a  mere  glimpse  round  the 
court,  yet  any  momentary  display  of  eccentricity  on  the  part 
of  a  witness,  or  petulance  or  repartee  on  the  part  of  counsel, 
would  occasion  a  momentary  merriment  that  in  point  of  fact 
served  only  as  a  sort  of  relief  to  the  strained  feelings  of  the 
audience,  and  instantly  disappeared.  The  tombstone  part  of 
the  case  was  got  through  easily ;  scarce  any  attempt  being 
made  on  the  part  of  Mr.  Aubrey's  counsel,  to  resist  or  inter- 
fere with  it.  But  the  great— the  hottest  part  of  the  fight — 
occurred  at  that  point  of  the  case,  where  Titmouse's  descent 
from  Stephen  Dreddlington  was  sought  to  be  established. 
This  gentleman,  who  had  been  a  very  wild  person,  whose 
movements  were  very  difficult  to  be  traced  or  accounted  for, 
had  entered  the  navy,  and  ultimately  died  at  sea,  as  had 
always  been  imagined,  single  and  childless.  It  was  proved, 
however,  that  so  far  from  such  being  the  case,  he  had  mar- 
ried a  person  at  Portsmouth,  of  inferior  station ;  and  that 
by  her  he  had  a  daughter,  only  two  years  before  his  death, 
which  happened  at  sea,  as  has  been  stated.  Both  mother 
and  daughter,  after  undergoing  great  privation,  and  no  notice 
being  taKen  of  the  mother  by  any  of  her  late  husband's 
family,  removed  to  the  house  of  a  humble  and  distant  rela- 
tive in  Cumberland,  where  the  mother  afterwards  died, 
leaving  her  daughter  only  fifteen  years  old.  When  she  grew 
Up,  she  lived  in  some  menial  capacity  in  Cumberland,  and 
ultimately  married  one  Gabriel  Tittlebat  Titmouse ;  who, 
after  living  for  some  years  a  cordwainer  at  Whitehaven, 
found  his  way  to  Grilston,  in  Yorkshire,  in  the  neighborhood 
of  which  town  he  had  lived  for  some  years,  in  very  humble 
circumstances.  There  he  had  married  ;  and  about  two  years 
afterwards  his  wife  died,  leaving  a  son— our  friend  Tittlebat 
Titmouse.  Both  of  them  afterwards  came  to  London  ;  where, 
in  four  or  five  years'  time,  the  father  died,  leaving  the  little 
Titmouse  to  flutter  and  hop  about  in  the  wide  world  as  best 
he  could.  During  the  whole  of  this  part  of  the  case  Mr. 
Gammon  had  evinced  his  deep  anxiety,  and  at  a  particular 
point — perhaps  the  crisis— his  agitation  was  excessive  ;  yet  it 
was  almost  entirely  concealed  by  his  remarkable  self-control. 
The  little  documentary  evidence  of  which  Gammon^  at  his. 


320  TEN  THOUSAND  A-YEAE. 

irst  interview  with  Titmouse,  found  him  possessed,  proved 
ut  the  trial,  as  Gammon  had  foreseen,  of  great  importance. 
The  evidence  in  support  of  this  part  of  the  case,  and  which 
ft  took  till  two  o'clock  on  the  ensuing  afternoon  to  get 
through,  was  subjected  to  a  most  determined  and  skilful  op- 
position by  the  Attorney-General,  but  in  vain.  The  case  had 
been  got  up  with  the  utmost  care,  under  the  excellent  man- 
agement of  Lynx;  and  Mr.  Subtle's  consummate  tact  and 
ability  brought  it,  at  length,  fully  and  distinctly  out  before 
the  jury. 

"  That,  my  Lord,"  said  he,  as  he  sat  down  after  re-examin- 
ing his  last  witness,  "  is  the  case  on  the  part  of  the  plaintiff." 
On  this  the  judge  and  jury  withdrew,  for  a  short  time,  to  ob- 
tain refreshment.  During  their  absence,  the  Attorney- 
General,  Mr.  Sterling,  Mr.  Crystal,  and  Mr.  Mansfield,  might 
have  been  seen,  with  their  heads  all  laid  close  together, 
engaged  in  anxious  consultation — a  group  gazed  at  by  the 
eager  eyes  of  many  a  spectator  whose  beating  heart  wished 
their  cause  God-speed.  The  Attorney-General  then  with- 
drew for  a  few  moments,  also  to  seek  refreshment ;  and  re- 
turning at  the  same  time  with  the  judge,  after  a  moment's 
pause  rose,  bowed  to  the  judge,  then  to  the  jury,  and  opened 
the  defendant's  case.  His  manner  was  calm  and  impressive ; 
his  person  was  dignified  :  and  his  clear,  distinct  voice  fell  on 
the  listening  ear  like  the  sound  of  silver.  After  a  graceful 
allusion  to  the  distinguished  character  of  his  friend  and 
client,  Mr.  Aubrey,  (to  whose  eminent  position  in  the  House  of 
Commons  he  bore  his  personal  testimony,)  and  to  the  magni- 
tude of  the  interest  now  at  stake,  he  proceeded—"  On  every 
account,  therefore,  I  feel  sensible,  gentlemen,  to  an  unusual 
and  most  painful  extent,  of  the  very  great  responsibility  now 
resting  upon  my  learned  friends  and  myself ;  lest  any  miscar- 
riage of  mine  should  prejudice  in  any  degree  the  important 
interests  committed  to  us,  or  impair  the  strength  of  the  case 
which  I  am  about  to  submit  to  you  on  the  part  of  Mr.  Au- 
brey :  a  case  which,  I  assure  you,  unless  some  extraordinary 
mischance  should  befall  us,  will  I  believe  annihilate  that 
which  with  so  much  pains,  so  much  tact,  and  so  much  ability, 
has  just  been  laid  before  you  by  my  learned  friend  Mr.  Sub- 
tle ;  and  establish  the  defendant  in  the  safe  possession  of 
that  large  property  which  is  the  subject  of  the  present  most 
extraordinary  and  unexpected  litigation.  But,  gentlemen, 
before  proceeding  so  far  as  that,  it  is  fitting  that  1  should  call 
your  attention  to  the  nature  of  the  case  set  up  on  the  part 
of  the  plaintiff,  and  the  sort  of  evidence  by  which  it  has  been 
attempted  to  be  supported ;  and  I  am  very  sanguine  of  being 
successful  in  showing  you  that  the  plaintiff's  witnesses  are 
not  entitled  to  the  credit  to  which  they  lay  claim ;  and,  con- 
sequently, that  there  is  no  case  made  out  for  the  defendant 
to  answer."  He  then  entered  into  a  rigorous  analysis  of  the 
plaintiff's  evidence,  contrasting  each  conflicting  portion  with 


TEN  THOUSAND  A-YEAK.  321 

the  other  with  singular  force  and  cogency ;  and  commenting 
with  powerful  severity  upon  the  denieanor  and  character  of 
many  of  the  witnesses.  On  proceeding,  at  length,  to  open  the 
case  of  the  defendant—"  And  here,  gentlemen,"  said  he,  "  I 
am  reminded  of  the  observation  with  which  my  learned  friend 
concluded— that  he  was  entirely  ignorant  of  the  case  which 
we  meant  to  set  up  in  answer  to  that  which  he  had  opened 
on  the  part  of  the  plaintiff.  Gentlemen,  it  would  have  been 
curious,  indeed,  had  it  been  otherwise— had  •  my  friend's 
penetrating  eye  been  able  to  inspect  the  contents  of  our 
strong-box— and  so  become  acquainted  with  the  evidence  9n 
which  my  client  rests  his  title  to  the  property  now  in  dis- 
pute. He  has,  however,  succeeded  in  entitling  himself  to  in- 
formation on  that  point ;  and  he  shall  have  it— and  to  his 
heart's  content."  Here  Mr.  Subtle  cast  a  glance  of  smiling 
incredulity  towards  the  jury,  and  defiance  towards  the  At- 
torney-General, "  I  will  now  concede  to  my  learned  friend 
every  inch  of  the  case  which  he  has  been  endeavoring  to 
make  out ;  that  he  has  completely  established  his  pedigree. 
Mind,  gentlemen,  I  concede  this  only  for  the  purpose  of  the 
case  which  I  am  about  to  lay  before  you."  He  then  men- 
tioned the  conveyance  by  Harry  Dreddlington  of  all  his  in- 
terest  "  You  forget  that  he  died  in  his  father's  lifetime, 

Mr.  Attorney-General,"  interposed  Mr.  Subtle,  with  a  placid 
smile,  and  the  air  of  a  man  who  is  suddenly  relieved  from  a 
vast  pressure  of  anxiety." 

"  Not  a  bit  of  it,  gentlemen,  not  a  bit  of  it— 'tis  a  part  of 
of  my  case.  My  learned  friend  is  quite  right ;  Harry  Dred- 
dlington did  die  in  his  father's  lifetime  : — but —  Here  Mr. 
Subtle  gazed  at  the  Attorney-General  with  unaffected  curios- 
ity ;  and,  when  the  latter  came  to  mention  "  the  Deed  of 
Confirmation  by  the  father  of  Harry  Dreddlington,"  an  acute 
observer  might  have  observed  a  slight  change  of  color  in  Mr. 
Subtle.  Mr.  Quicksilver  went  on  writing— for  he  was  entire- 
ly  out  of  his  depth,  and  therefore  occupied  himself  with 
thinking  over  an  article  he  was  writing  for  some  political  re- 
view. Mr.  Lynx  looked  at  the  Attorney-General  as  if  he  ex- 
pected every  instant  to  receive  a  musket-ball  in  his  breast. 

"What,  ''confirm'*  a  nullity,  Mr.  Attorney-General  ?"  in- 
terrupted Mr.  Subtle,  laying  down  his  pen  with  a  smile  of 
derision^  but  a  moment  or  two  afterwards,  Mr.  Mortmain," 
said  he,  m  a  hasty  whisper,  "  what  do  you  think  of  this  ?  Tell 
me— in  four  words — "  Mortmain,  his  eye  glued  to  the  face 
of  the  Attorney-General  the  while,  muttered  hastily  some- 
thing about — operating  as  a  new  grant — as  a  new  conveyance. 

"  Pshaw !  I  mean  what's  the  answer  to  it  ?  "  muttered  Mr. 
Subtle  impatiently ;  but  his  countenance  preserved  its  ex- 
pression of  smiling  nonchalance.  "  You  will  oblige  me,  Mr. 
Mortmain,"  he  by-and-by  whispered,  in  a  quiet  but  peremp- 
tory tone,  "by  giving  your  utmost  attention  to  the  question 
as  to  the  effect  of  this  deed— so  that  I  may  shape  my  objec- 
tion to  it  properly  when  it  is  tendered  in  evidence.  If  it 


322  TEN  THOUSAND  A-YEAB. 

really  have  the  legal  effect  attributed  to  it,  and  which  I  sus- 
pect is  the  case,  we  may  as  well  shut  up  our  briefs.  I  thought 
there  must  be  some  such  cursed  point  or  other  in  the  back- 
ground." 

Gammon  saw  the  real  state  of  Mr.  Subtle's  mind,  and  his 
cheek  turned  pale,  but  he  preserved  a  smile  on  his  counte- 
ance,  as  he  sat  with  his  arms  folded.  Quirk  eyed  him  with 
undisguised  agitation,  scarce  daring  to  look  up  at  Mr.  Subtle. 
Titmouse,  seeing  a  little  dismay  in  his  camp,  turned  very 
white  and  cold,  and  sat  still,  scarce  daring  to  breathe ;  while 
Snap  looked  like  a  terrier  going  to  have  its  teeth  pulled  out. 

At  length  the  Attorney-General,  after  stating  that,  in  addi- 
tion to  the  case  which  he  had  intimated,  as  resting  mainly  on 
the  deed  of  confirmation,  he  should  proceed  to  prove  the  pedi- 
gree of  Mr.  Aubrey,  sat  down,  having  spoken  about  two  hours 
and  a  half,  expressing  his  conviction  that  when  the  defend- 
ant's evidence  should  have  been  closed,  the  jury,  under  his 
lordship's  direction,  would  return  a  verdict  for  the  defendant ; 
and  that,  too,  without  leaving  the  jury-box,  where,  by  their 
long  and  patient  attention,  they  had  so  honorably  acquitted 
themselves  of  the  important  duty  imposed  upon  them  by  the 
constitution. 

"  James  Parkinson ! "  exclaimed  Mr.  Sterling,  quietly  but 
distinctly  as  the  Attorney-General  sat  down.  "  You  are  the 
attorney  for  the  defendant?"  inquired  Mr.  Sterling,  as  soon 
as  the  witness  had  been  sworn.  "  Do  you  produce  a  convey- 
ance between  Harry  Dreddlington  and  Moses  Aaron  ?  "  etc. 
(specifying  it.)  It  was  proved  and  put  in,  without  much  op- 
position. So  also  was— the  assignment  from  Moses  Aaron 
to  Geoff ry  Dreddlington. 

"  Do  you  also  produce  a  deed  between  Harry  Dreddlington 
the  elder  and  Geoffry  Dreddlington  ?  "  and  he  mentioned 
the  date  and  names  of  all  the  parties.  Mr.  Parkinson  handed 
in  the  important  document. 

"Stay,  stay;  where  did  you  get  that  deed,  Mr.  Parkin- 
son?" inquired  Mr.  Subtle  sharply,  extending  his  hand  for 
the  deed. 

"  From  my  office  at  Grilston,  where  I  keep  many  of  Mr. 
Aubrey's  title  deeds." 

'  When  did  you  bring  it  hither  ?  " 

'  About  ten  o'clock  last  night,  for  the  purpose  of  this  trial." 

'  How  long  has  it  been  at  your  office  ?  " 

'Ever  since  I  fetched  it,  a  year  or  two  ago,  with  other 
deeds,  from  the  muniment-room  of  Yatton  Hall." 

How  long  have  you  been  solicitor  to  Mr.  Aubrey  ?  " 

'  For  this  ten  years,  and  my  father  was  solicitor  to  his 
father  for  twenty-five  years." 

"  Will  you  swear  that  this  deed  was  in  your  office  before 
the  proceedings  in  this  action  were  brought  to  your  notice  ?  " 

"  I  have  not  the  slightest  doubt  in  the  world." 

"  That  does  not  satisfy  me,  sir.  Will  you  swear  that  it 
Was?" 


TEN  THOUSAND  A-YEAR.  323 

u  I  will,  sir,"  replied  Mr.  Parkinson  firmly.  "  It  never  at- 
tracted any  more  notice  from  me  than  any  other  of  Mr.  Au- 
brey's deeds,  till  my  attention  was  drawn  to  it  in  consequence 
of  these  proceedings." 

"Has  any  one  access  to  Mr.  Aubrey's  deeds  at  your  office 
but  yourself?" 

"  None  that  I  know  of:  I  keep  all  the  deeds  of  my  clients 
that  are  at  my  office  in  their  respective  boxes,  and  allow  no 
one  access  to  them;  except  under  my  immediate  notice,  and 
in  my  presence." 

Then  Mr.  Subtle  sat  down. 

"  My  Lord,  we  now  propose  to  put-  in  this  deed,"  said  the 
Attorney-General,  unfolding  it. 

"Allow  me  to  look  at  it,  Mr.  Attorney,"  said  Mr.  Subtle. 
It  Ayas  handed  to  him  ;  and  he,  his  juniors,  and  Mr.  Mort- 
main, rising  up,  were  engaged  most  anxiously  in  scrutinizing 
it  for  some  minutes.  Mortmain  haying  looked  at  the  stamp, 
sat  down,  and  opening  his  bag'  hastily  drew  out  an  old  well- 
worn  volume,  which  contained  all  the  stamp  acts  that  had 
ever  been  passed  from  the  time  of  William  the  Third,  when, 
I  believe,  the  first  of  those  blessings  was  conferred  upon  this 
country.  First  he  looked  at  the  deed-  -then  at  his  book- 
then  at  the  deed  again ;  and  at  length  might  be  seen  with 
earnest  gestures,  putting  Mr.  Subtle  in  possession  of  his 
opinion  on  the  subject.  "My  Lord,"  said  Mr.  Subtle  after  a 
pause,  "I  object  to  this  instrument  being  received  as  evi- 
dence, on  account  of  the  insufficiency  of  the  stamp."  This 
produced  quite  a  sensation  in  court.  Mr.  Subtle  then  pro- 
ceeded to  mention  the  character  of  the  stamp  affixed  to  the 
deed,  and  read  the  act  which  was  in  force  at  the  time  that 
the  deed  bore  date  ;  and  after  a  few  additional  observations, 
sat  down,  and  was  followed  by  Mr.  Quicksilver  and  Mr. 
Lynx.  Then  arose  the  Attorney-General,  having  in  the  mean 
time  carefully  looked  at  the  Act  of  Parliament,  and  submit- 
ted to  his  Lordship  that  the  stamp  was  sufficient ;  being  fol- 
lowed by  his  juniors.  Mr.  Subtle  replied  at  some  length. 

"  I  certainly  entertain  some  difficulty  on  the  point,"  said 
his  Lordship,  "and  will  mention  the  matter  to  my  brother 
Grayley."  Taking  with  him  the  deed,  and  Mr.  Mortmain's 
Stamp  Acts,  his  lordship  left  the  court,  and  was  absent  a 
quarter  of  an  hour— half  an  hour— three  quarters  of  an  hour ; 
and  at  length  returned. 

"  I  have  consulted,"  said  he,  as  soon  as  he  had  taken  his 
seat,  amidst  the  profoundest  silence,  "  my  brother  Grayley, 
and  we  have  very  fully  considered  the  point.  My  brother 
happens,  fortunately,  to  have  by  him  a  manuscript  note  of  a 
case  in  which  he  was  counsel,  about  eighteen  years  ago,  and 
in  which  the  exact  point  arose  which  exists  in  the  present 
case.  He  then  read  out  of  a  thick  manuscript  book,  which 
he  had  brought  with  him  from  Mr.  Justice  Grayley,  the  par- 
ticulars of  the  case  alluded  to,  and  which  was  certainly  al< 


324  TEN  THOUSAND  A-YEAR. 

most  precisely  similar  to  those  then  before  the  court.  In  the 
case  referred  to,  the  stamp  had  been  held  sufficient ;  and  so, 
his  Lordship  and  his  brother  Grayley  were  of  opinion,  was 
the  stamp  in  the  deed  then  before  him.  The  cloud  which 
had  settled  upon  the  countenances  of  the  Attorney-General 
and  his  party,  here  flitted  over  to  and  settled  upon  those  of 
his  opponents.  "  Your  Lordship  will  perhaps  take  a  note  of 
the  objection,"  said  Mr.  Subtle,  somewhat  chagrined.  Lord 
Widdrington  nodded,  and  immediately  made  the  requisite 
entry  in  his  notes. 

"Now,  then,  we  propose  to  put  in  and  read  this  deed,"  said 
the  Attorney-General,  with  a  smile  of  suppressed  triumph, 
holding  out  his  hand  towards  Mr.  Lynx,  who  was  spelling 
over  it  very  eagerly—"  I  presume  my  learned  friend  will  re- 
quire only  the  operative  parts  to  be  read  " — here  Lynx,  with 
some  excitement,  called  his  leader's  attention  to  something 
which  had  occurred  to  him  in  the  deed  :  up  got  Quicksilver 
and  Mortmain ;  and  presently — 

"  Not  quite  so  fast,  Mr.  Attorney,  if  you  please,"  said  Mr. 
Subtle  with  a  little  elation  of  manner — "  I  have  another,  and 
I  apprehend  a  clearly  fatal  objection  to  the  admissibility  of 
this  deed,  till  my  learned  friend  shall  have  accounted  for  an 
ERASURE  "- 

"  Erasure  ! "  echoed  the  Attorney-General  with  much  sur- 
prise— "  Allow  me  to  see  the  deed ;  "  and  he  took  it  with  an 
incredulous  smile,  which,  however,  disappeared  as  he  looked 
more  and  more  closely  at  the  instrument :  Mr.  Sterling,  Mr. 
Crystal,  and  Mr.  Mansfield  also  looking  extremely  serious. 

'*  I've  hit  them  now"  said  Mr.  Subtle  to  those  behind  him, 
as  he  leaned  back,  and  looked  with  no  little  triumph  at  his 
opponents — "  by  Jove ! — was  there  ever  anything  so  lucky  in 
this  world  before  ?"  From  what  apparently  inadequate  and 
trifling  causes  often  flow  great  results !  The  plain  fact  of  the 
case  was  merely  this.  The  attorney's  clerk,  in  copying  out 
the  deed,  which  was  one  of  considerable  length,  had  written 
four  or  five  words  by  mistake  ;  and  fearing  to  exasperate  his 
master,  by  rendering  necessary  a  new  deed  and  stamp,  and 
occasioning  trouble  and  delay,  neatly  scratched  out  the  er- 
roneous words,  and  over  the  erasure  wrote  the  correct  ones. 
As  he  was  the  party  who  was  entrusted  with  seeing  to  and 
witnessing  the  execution  of  the  instrument,  he  of  course  took 
no  notice  of  the  alteration,  and — see  the  result !  The  owner., 
ship  of  an  estate  of  ten  thousand  a-year  about  to  turn  upon 
the  effect  of  this  erasure ! 

"  Hand  me  up  the  deed,"  said  the  Judge  ;  and  inspected  it 
minutely  for  a  minute  or  two. 

"  Has  any  one  a  magnifying-glass  in  court?"  inquired  the 
Attorney-General,  with  a  look  of  increasing  anxiety.  No  one 
happened  to  have  one. 

Is  it  necessary,  Mr.  Attorney  ?"  said  Lord  Widdringten. 
banding  down  the  instrument  to  him  with  an  ominous  look. 

"  Well— you  object,,  of  course JMr.  Subtle— as  I  understand 


TEN  THOUSAND  A-YEAE.  325 

you — that  this  deed  is  void,  on  account  of  an  erasure  in  a 
material  part  of  it?"  inquired  Lord  Widdrington. 

"  That  is  my  objection,  my  lord,"  said  Mr.  Subtle,  sitting 
down. 

"  Now,  Mr.  Attorney,"  continued  the  Judge,  turning  to 
the  Attorney-General,  prepared  to  take  a  note  of  any  obser- 
vations he  might  offer.  The  spectators,  the  whole  court- 
were  aware  that  the  great  crisis  of  the  case  had  arrived ;  and 
there  was  a  sickening  silence.  The  Attorney-General,  with 
perfect  calmness  and  self-possession,  immediately  addressed 
the  court  in  answer  to  the  objection.  That  there  was  an 
erasure,  which,  owing  to  the  hurry  with  which  the  instru- 
ment had  been  looked  at,  had  been  overlooked,  was  indis- 
putable; of  course  the  Attorney-General's  argument  was, 
that  it  was  an  erasure  in  a  part  not  material ;  but  it  was  easy 
to  see  that  he  spoke  with  the  air  of  a  man  who  argues  contra 
spem.  What  he  said,  however,  was  pertinent  and  forcible ; 
the  same  might  be  said  of  Mr.  Sterling  and  Mr,  Crystal ;  but 
they  were  all  plainly  gravelled.  Mr.  Subtle  replied  with 
cruel  cogency  :  Mr.  Quicksilver  seized  the  opportunity — not 
choosing  to  see  that  the  Judge  was  with  them— to  make  a 
most  dangerous  but  showy  speech ;  Mr.  Subtle  sitting  beside 
him  in  the  utmost  distress,  looking  as  if  he  could  have 
withered  him  with  a  word.  Inconsequence  of  some  very 
unguarded  admissions  of  Quicksilver,  down  came  upon  him 
Lord  Widdrington ;  and  Mr.  Subtle— the  only  time  during 
the  whole  cause  in  which  he  lost  his  self-command — uttered 
a  half-stifled  curse  at  the  folly  of  Quicksilver,  that  could  be 
heard  by  half  the  bar,  perhaps  even  by  the  Judge,  who 
greatly  relished  the  exposure  he  was  making  of  Quicksilver's 
indiscretion.  At  length  he  sat  down,  with  a  somewhat  fool- 
ish air.  Mr.  Subtle  turning  his  back  full  upon  him  before 
the  whole  court ;  but  when  Lynx  rose,  and  in  a  business- 
like way,  with  only  a  word  or  two,  put  the  point  again  fully 
before  Lord  Widdrington,  the  scowl  gradually  disappeared 
from  the  brow  of  Mr.  Subtle. 

"  Well,"  said  Lord  Widdrington,  when  Mr.  Lynx  had  done, 
"I  own  I  feel  no  doubt  at  all  upon  the  matter-  but  as  it  is 
certainly  of  the  greatest  possible  importance,  I  will  just  see 
how  it  strikes  my  brother  Grayley."  With  this  he  took  the 
deed  in  his  hand,  and  quitted  the  court.  He  touched  Mr. 
Aubrey,  in  passing  to  his  private  room,  holding  the  deed  be- 
fore him.  After  an  absence  of  about  ten  minutes,  Lord 
Widdrington  returned. 

'•  Silence !  silence  there  ! "  bawled  the  crier ;  and  the  bustle 
had  soon  subsided  into  profound  silence. 

"  I  entertain  no  doubt,  nor  does  my  brother  Grayley,"  said 
Lord  Widdrington,  "that  I  ought  not  to  receive  this  deed  in 
evidence,  without  accounting  for  an  erasure  occurring  in  a 
clearly  essential  part  of  it.  TJ  nless,  therefore,  you  .are  prepar- 
ed, Mr.  Attorney,  with  any  evidence  as  to  this  point,  I  shall 
not  receive  the  deed," 


S26  TEN  THOUSAND  A-YEAR. 

There  was  a  faint  buzz  all  over  the  court— a  buzz  of  excite* 
ment,  anxiety,  and  disappointment.  The  Attorney-General 
consulted  for  a  moment  or  two  with  his  friends. 

"  Undoubtedly,  my  lord,  we  are  not  prepared  with  any 
evidence  to  explain  an  appearance,  which  has  taken  us  en- 
tirely by  surprise.  After  this  length  of  time,  my  lord,  of 
course " 

"  Certainly — it  is  a  great  misfortune  for  the  parties— a 
great  misfortune.  Of  course  you  tender  the  deed  in  evi- 
dence ?  "  he  continued,  taking  a  note. 

"  We  do,  my  lord,  certainly." 

You  should  have  seen  the  faces  of  Messrs.  Quirk,  Gammon, 
and  Snap,  as  they  looked  at  Mr.  Parkinson,  with  an  agitated 
air,  returning  the  rejected  deed  to  the  bag  from  which  it  had 
been  lately  taken  with  so  confident  and  triumphant  an  air ! — 
The  remainder  of  the  case,  which  had  been  opened  by  the 
Attorney-General  on  behalf  of  Mr.  Aubrey,  was  then  pro- 
ceeded with  :  but  in  spite  of  all  their  assumed  calmness,  the 
disappointment  and  distress  of  his  counsel  were  perceptible 
to  all.  They  were  now  dejected — they  felt  that  the  cause 
was  lost,  unless  some  extraordinary  good  fortune  should  yet 
befall  them.  They  were  not  long  in  establishing  the  descent 
of  Mr.  Aubrey  from  Geoff  ry  Dreddlington.  It  was  necessary 
to  do  so ;  for  grievously  as  they  had  been  disappointed  in 
failing  to  establish  the  title  paramount,  founded  upon  the 
deed  of  confirmation  of  Mr.  Aubrey,  it  was  yet  an  important 
question  for  the  jury,  whether  they  believed  the  evidence 
adduced  by  the  plaintiff  to  show  title  in  himself. 

"  That,  my  lord,  is  the  defendant's  case,*'  said  the  At- 
torney-General, as  his  last  witness  left  the  box;  and  Mr. 
Subtle  then  rose  to  reply.  He  felt  how  unpopular  was  his 
cause ;  that  almost  every  countenance  around  him  bore  a 
hostile  expression.  Privately,  he  loathed  his  case  when  he 
saw  the  sort  of  person  for  whom  he  was  struggling.  All  his 
sympathies — for  he  was  a  very  proud,  haughty  man — were 
on  behalf  of  Mr.  Aubrey,  whom  by  name  and  reputation  he 
well  knew ;  with  whom  he  had  often  sat  in  the  House  of 
Commons.  Now,  conspicuous  before  him,  sat  his  little 
monkey-client,  Titmouse — a  ridiculous  object ;  and  calculat- 
ed if  there  were  any  scope  for  the  influence  of  prejudice,  to 
ruin  his  own  cause  by  the  exhibition  of  himself  before  the 
jury.  That  was  the  vulgar  idiot  who  was  to  turn  the  admir- 
able Aubreys  out  of  Yatton,  and  send  them  beggared  into 
the  world! — But  Mr.  Subtle  was  a  high-minded  English 
advocate  ;  and  if  he  had  seen  Miss  Aubrey  in  all  her  loveli- 
ness, and  knew  her  all  depended  upon  his  exertions,  he  could 
hardly  have  exerted  himself  more  successfully  than  he  did 
on  the  present  occasion.  And  such,  at  length,  was  the  effect 
which  that  exquisitely  skilful  advocate  produced,  in  his  ad- 
dress to  the  jury,  that  he  began  to  bring  about  a  change  in 
the  feelings  of  most  around  him :  even  the  eye  of  scornful 
beauty  began  to  direct  fewer  glances  of  indignation  and  dis- 


TEN  THOUSAND  A-YEAE.  327 

gust  upon  Titmouse,  as  Mr.  Subtle' s  irresistible  rhetoric 
drew  upon  their  sympathies  in  his  behalf.  "  My  learned 
friend,  the  Attorney-General,  gentlemen,  dropped  one  or  two 
expressions  of  a  somewhat  disparaging  tendency,  in  alluding 
to  my  client,  Mr.  Titmouse ;  and  shadowed  forth  a  disadvan- 
tageous contrast  between  the  obscure  and  ignorant  plaintiff, 
and  the  gifted  defendant.  Good  God,  gentlemen !  and  is  my 
humble  client's  misfortune  to  become  his  fault  ?  If  he  be 
obscure  and  ignorant,  unacquainted  with  the  usages  of 
society,  deprived  of  the  blessings  of  a  superior  education— if 
he  have  contracted  vulgarity,  whose  fault  is  it  f— Who  has 
occasioned  it?  Who  plunged  him  and  his  parents  before 
him  into  an  unjust  poverty  and  obscurity,  from  which  Pro- 
vidence is  about  this  day  to  rescue  him,  and  put  him  in 
possession  of  his  own  ?  Gentlemen,  if  topics  like  these  must 
be  introduced  into  this  case,  I  ask  you  who  is  accountable  for 
the  present  condition  of  my  unfortunate  client?  Is  he,  or 
are  those  who  have  been,  perhaps  unconsciously,  but  still  un- 
justly, so  long  revelling  in  the  wealth  that  is  his?  Gentle- 
men, in  the  name  of  everything  that  is  manly  and  generous,  I 
challenge  your  sympathy,  your  commiseration,  for  my  client." 
Here  Titmouse,  who  had  been  staring  up  open-mouthed  for 
some  time  at  his  eloquent  advocate,  and  could  be  kept  quiet 
no  longer  by  the  most  vehement  efforts  of  Messrs.  Quirk, 
Gammon,  and  Snap,  rose  up  in  an  excited  manner,  exclaim- 
ing, "  Bravo!  bravo,  bravo,  sir!  'Pon  my  life,  capital !  It's 
quite  true — bravo !  bravo ! "  His  astounded  advocate  paused 
at  this  unprecedented  interruption.  "  Take  the  puppy  out  of 
court,  sir,  or  I  will  not  utter  one  word  more,"  said  he  in  a 
fierce  whisper  to  Mr.  Gammon. 

"  Who  is  that  ?  Leave  the  court,  sir  !  Your  conduct  is  most 
indecent,  sir !  I  have  a  great  mind  to  commit  you,  sir ! "  said 
Lord  Widdrington,  directing  an  awful  look  down  to  the  of- 
fender, who  had  turned  of  a  ghastly  whiteness. 

"  Have  mercy  upon  me,  my  lord !  I'll  never  do  it  again,"  he 
groaned,  clasping  his  hands,  and  verily  believing  that  Lord 
Widdrington  was  going  to  take  the  estate  away  from  him. 

Snap  at  length  succeeded  in  getting  him  out  of  court,  and 
after  the  excitement  occasioned  by  this  irregular  interrup- 
tion had  subsided,  Mr.  Subtle  resumed : 

"  Gentlemen,"  said  he  in  a  low  tone,  "  I  perceive  that  you 
are  moved  by  this  little  incident ;  and  it  is  characteristic  of 
your  superior  feelings.  Inferior  persons,  destitute  of  sensi- 
bility or  refinement,  might  have  smiled  at  eccentricities 
which  occasion  you  only  feelings  of  greater  commiseration. 

I  protest,  gentlemen "  his  voice  trembled  for  a  momenL 

put  he  soon  resumed  his  self-possession ;  and,  after  a  long  and 
admirable  address,  sat  down  confident  of  the  verdict. 

"  If  we  lose  the  verdict,  sir,"  said  he  bending  down  and 
whispering  into  the  ear  of  Gammon,  "  we  may  thank  that 
execrable  little  puppy  for  it,"  Gammon  changed  color  but 
made  no  reply. 


328  TEN  THOUSAND  A-TEAE. 

Lord  Widdrington  then  commenced  summing  up  the  case 
to  the  jury,  with  his  usual  care  and  perspicacity.  Nothing 
could  be  more  beautiful  than  the  ease  with  which  he  extri- 
cated the  facts  of  the  case  from  the  meshes  in  which  they 
had  been  alternately  involved  by  Mr.  Subtle  and  the  Attor- 
ney-General. As  soon  as  he  had  explained  to  them  the  gen- 
eral principles  of  law  applicable  to  the  case,  he  placed  before 
them  the  facts  proved  by  the  plaintiff,  and  the  answer  of  the 
defendant :  every  one  in  court  trembled  for  the  result,  if  the 
jury  took  the  same  view  which  they  felt  compelled  themselves 
to  take.  He  suggested  that  they  should  retire  to  consider 
the  case,  taking  with  them  the  pedigrees  which  had  been 
handed  in  to  them ;  and  added  that,  if  they  should  require 
his  assistance,  he  should  remain  in  his  private  room  for  an 
hour  or  two.  Both  judge  and  jury  then  retired,  it  being 
about  eight  o'clock.  Candles  were  lit  in  the  court,  which 
continued  crowded  to  suffocation.  Few  doubted  which  way 
the  verdict  would  go.  Fatigued  as  must  have  been  most  of 
the  spectators  with  a  two  days'  confinement  and  excitement 
—ladies  as  well  as  gentlemen— scarce  a  person  thought  of  quit- 
ting till  the  verdict  had  been  pronounced.  After  an  hour 
and  a  half's  absence,  a  cry  was  heard—"  Clear  the  way  for  the 
jury ;  "  and  one  or  two  officers,  with  their  wands,  obeyed  the 
directions.  As  the  jury  were  re-entering  their  box,  strug- 

fliing  with  a  little  difficulty  through  the  crowd,  Lord  Wid- 
rington  resumed  his  seat  upon  the  bench. 

"  Gentlemen  of  the  jury,  have  the  goodness,"  said  the  asso- 
ciate, "to  answer  to  your  names. — Sir  Godolphin  Fitzherbert 

"  and  while  their  names  were  thus  called  over,  all  the 

counsel  took  their  pens,  and,  turning  over  their  briefs  with 
an  air  of  anxiety,  prepared  to  endorse  on  them  the  verdict. 
As  soon  as  all  the  jurymen  had  answered,  a  profound  silence 
ensued. 

"  Gentleman  of  the  jury,"  enquired  the  associate,  are  you 
agreed  upon  the  verdict  ?  Do  you  find  your  verdict  for  the 
plaintiff,  or  for  the  defendant  ?" 

"  FOR  THE  PLAINTIFF,"  replied  the  foreman  ;  on  which  the 
officer,  amidst  a  kind  of  blank  dismayed  silence,  making  at 
the  same  time  some  hieroglyphics  upon  the  record,  mutter- 
ed— "  Verdict  for  the  plaintiff. — Damages  one  shilling.  Costs, 
forty  shillings;  while  another,  functionary  bawled  out, 
amidst  the  increasing  buzz  in  the  court,  "  Have  the  goodness 
to  wait  gentlemen  of  the  jury.  You  will  be  paid  immediate- 
ly." Whereupon  to  the  disgust  and  indignation  of  the  un- 
learned spectators,  and  the  astonishment  of  some  of  the 
gentleman  of  the  jury  themselves— many  of  them  the  very 
first  men  of  the  county— Snap  jumped  up  on  the  form,  pull- 
ed out  his  purse  with  an  air  of  exultation,  and  proceeded  to 
remunerate  Sir  Godolphin  Fitzherbert  and  his  companions 
with  the  sum  of  two  guineas  each.  Proclamation  was  then 
made,  and  the  court  adjourned  till  the  next  morning. 


TEN  THOUSAND  A-YEAE.  329 


CHAPTER  XIV. 

"  THE  Attorney-General  did  his  work  very  fairly,  I  thought 
— eh,  Lynx  ?  "  said  Mr.  Subtle,  as,  arm-in-arm  with  Mr.  Lynx, 
he  quitted  the  castle-gates,  each  of  them  on  his  way  to  their 
respective  lodgings,  to  prepare  for  their  next  day's  work. 

"  Yes —  he's  a  keen  hand,  to  be  sure :  he's  given  us  all  work 
enough ;  and  I  must  say,  it's  been  a  capital  set-to  between 
you !  I'm  very  glad  you  got  the  verdict ! " 

"  It  wouldn't  have  done  to  be  beaten  on  one's  own  dunghill, 
as  it  were — eh  ?  By  the  way,  Lynx,  that  was  a  good  hit  01 
yours  about  the  erasure— I  ought,  really,  if  it  had  occurred  to 
me  at  the  time,  to  have  given  you  the  credit  of  it — 'twas  en- 
tirely yours,  Lynx,  I  must  say." 

"  Oh,  no  !  " — replied  Lynx  modestly.  "  It  was  a  mere  ac- 
cident my  lighting  on  it ;  the  merit  was,  the  use  you  made 
of  it!" 

"  To  think  of  ten  thousand  a-year  turning  on  that  same 
trumpery  erasure !  " 

"But  are  you  sure  of  our  verdict  on  that  ground,  Mr. 
Subtle?  Do  you  think  Widdrington  was  right  in  rejecting 
that  deed  ?  " 

"  Right  ?  to  be  sure  he  was  !  But  I  own  I  got  rather  un- 
easy at  the  way  the  Attorney-General  put  it— that  the  estate* 
had  once  been  vested,  and  could  not  be  subsequently  de-vestv 
ed  by  an  alteration  or  blemish  in  the  instrument  evidenc 
ing  the  passing  of  the  estate — eh ?  that  was  a  good  pointv 
Lynx." 

"  Ay,  but  as  Lord  Widdrington  put  it— that  could  be  only 
where  the  defect  was  proved  to  exist  after  a  complete  and 
valid  deed  had  been  once  established." 

"  True— true ;  that's  the  answer,  Lynx  ;  here,  you  see,  the 
deed  is  disgraced  in  the  first  instance  ;  no  proof  m  fact,  that 
it  ever  was  a  deed— therefore  mere  waste  paper." 

"  To  be  sure,  possession  has  gone  along  with  the  deed 

'•  Possession  gone  along  with  it  ?— What  then !— That  is  to 
say,  the  man  who  has  altered  it,  to  benefit  himself  and  his 
heirs,  keeps  it  snugly  in  his  own  chest — and  then  that  is  of 
itself  to  be  sufficient  to — 

"  Yes— and  again,  you  know,  isn't  it  the  general  rule  that 
the  party  producing  an  instrument  must  account  for  the  ap- 
pearance of  erasure  or  alteration  to  encounter  the  presump- 
tion of  fraud?— it  seems  good  sense  enough ! " 

"It's  really  been  a  very  interesting  cause,"  said  Mr. 
Subtle. 


330  TEN  THOUSAND  A-YEAR. 

"  Very.  Some  capital  points— that  of  Mortmain's  on  the 
stamp  act " 

"  Pish,  Lynx !  there's  nothing  in  it !  I  meant  the  cause  it- 
self  had  been  an  interesting  one — uncommonly." 

Mr.  Subtle  suddenly  paused,  and  stood  still.  "  God  bless 
my  soul,  Lynx— I've  made  a  blunder ! " 

^•Eh!" 

"  Yes — by  Jove,  a  blunder !  Never  did  such  a  thing  since 
I've  had  a  cause  before." 

"A  blunder?  Impossible !— What  is  it?"  inquired  Lynx 
briskly,  pricking  up  nis  ears. 

"  It  will  be  at  least  thirty  or  forty  pounds  out  of  our  client's 
pocket.  I  forgot  to  ask  AViddrington  for  the  certificate  for 
the  costs  of  the  special  jury.  I  protest  I  never  did  such  a 
thing  before— I  am  quite  annoyed  I  hate  to  overlook  any- 
thing." 

"  Oh !  is  that  all  ?  "  inquired  Lynx,  much  relieved — "  then 
it's  all  right !  While  you  were  speaking  to  Mr.  Gammon, 
immediately  after  the  verdict  had  been  given,  I  turned  to- 
wards Quicksilver  to  get  him  to  ask  for  the  certificate — out 
he  had  seen  a  man  with  the  new  '  Times '  containing  the  divi- 
sion on  the  Catholic  claims,  and  had  set  off  after  him — so  I 
took  the  liberty,  as  you  seemed  very  earnestly  talking  to  Mr. 
Gammon,  to  name  it  to  the  judge — and  its  all  right." 

"  Capital ! — Then  there  isn't  a  point  missed  ?  And  in  a  good 
two-days'  fight  that's  something." 

"  D'ye  think  we  shall  keep  the  verdict,  and  get  its  fruits, 
Mr.  Subtle?" 

'•  We  shall  keep  the  verdict,  I've  no  doubt ;  there's  nothing 
in  Widdrington's  notes  that  we  need  be  afraid  of — but  of 
course  they'll  put  us  to  bring  another  ejectment,  perhaps 
several." 

"  Yes— certainly— there  must  be  a  good  deal  of  fighting  be- 
fore such  a  property  as  Yatton  changes  hands,"  replied  Lynx, 
with  a  complacent  air ;  for  he  saw  a  few  pleasant  pickings  in 
store  for  him.  "  By  the  way,"  he  continued,  "  our  client's  a 
sweet  specimen  of  humanity,  isn't  he  ?  " 

"Faugh!  odious  little  reptile!  And  did  you  ever  in  all 
your  life  witness  such  a  scene  as  when  he  interrupted  me  in 
the  way  he  did?" 

"  Ha,  Ha !  Never !  But,  upon  my  honor,  what  an  exqui- 
site turn  you  gave  the  thing — it  was  worth  more  than  called 
it  forth— it  was  admirable." 

"Pooh— Lynx!"  said  Mr.  Subtle,  with  a  gratified  air; 
"  knack — mere  knack— nothing  more.  My  voice  trembled— 
eh  ?— at  least  so  I  intended." 

"Upon my  soul,  Mr.  Subtle,  I  almost  thought  you  were  for 
the  moment  overcome,  and  going  to  shed  tears. 

"Ah,  ah,  ah!— Delightful!  I  was  convulsed  with  inward 
laughter!  Shed  tears! !  Did  the  Bar  take  it,  Lynx?"  in- 
quired Mr.  Subtle ;  for  though  he  hated  display,  he  loved 


TEN  THOUSAND  A-TEAE.  331 

appreciation,  and  by  competent  persons.  "  By  the  way,  Lynx, 
the  way  in  which  you've  got  up  the  whole  case  does  you  vast 
credit— that  opinion  of  yours  on  the  evidence  was— upon  my 
word — the  most  masterly" — here  he  suddenly  ceased  and 
squeezed  his  companion's  arm,  motioning  him  thereby  to 
silence.  They  had  come  up  with  two  gentlemen,  walking 
slowly,  and  conversing  in  a  low  tone,  but  with  much  earnest- 
ness of  manner.  They  were,  in  fact,  Mr.  Aubrey  and  Lord 
De  la  Zouch.  Mr.  Subtle  and  Mr.  Lynx  crossed  to  the  other 
side  of  the  narrow  street,  and  quickened  their  pace,  so  as 
soon  to  be  out  of  sight  and  hearing  of  the  persons  they 
seemed  desirous  of  avoiding.  Mr.  Subtle  was,  indeed,  un- 
able to  bear  the  sight  of  the  man  whom  his  strenuous  and 
splendid  exertions  during  the  last  two  days  had  tended  to 
strip  of  his  all — to  thrust  from  the  bright  domain  of  wealth, 
prosperity,  distinction,  into — as  it  were — outer  darkness — the 
outer  darkness  of  poverty— of  destitution. 

"  It's  a  bore  for  Mr.  Aubrey,  isn't  it  ?  "  quoth  the  matter-of- 
fact  Lynx. 

"  It's  quite  frightful !  "—replied  Mr.  Subtle,  in  a  tone  of 
voice  and  with  a  manner  which  showed  how  deeply  he  felt 
what  he  uttered.  "And  it's  not  only  what  he  will  lose,  but 
what  he  will  be  liable  to — the  mesne  profits— sixty  thousand 
pounds." 

"  Oh ! — you  think,  then,  that  we  can't  go  beyond  the  statute 
of  limitations  ?— Eh  ? — is  that  so  clear?"  Mr.  Subtle  looked 
sharply  at  Lynx,  with  an  expression  it  would  be  difficult  to 
describe.  "Well" — continued  the  impenetrable  Lynx — "at 
all  events  I'll  look  into  it."  He  felt  about  as  much  sentiment 
in  the  matter,  as  a  pig  eating  acorns  would  feel  interest  in 
the  antiquity  of  the  oak  from  which  they  fell,  and  under 
whose  venerable  shade  he  was  munching  and  stuffing  him- 
self 

"  By  the  way,  Lynx— aren't  you  with  me  in  Higson  and 
Mellington?"' 

"  Yes — and  it  stands  first  for  to-morrow  morning." 

"  What's  it  about  ?  I've  not  opened  my  papers,  and — why, 
we've  a  consultation  fixed  for  ten  to-night/' 

"It's  libel  against  a  newspaper  editor— the  POMFRET 
COCKATRICE  ;  and  our  client's  a  clergymen." 

"  What  about  ?  " 

"  Tithes — grasping,  cruelty,  and  so  forth." 

"  Justification  'i " 

"  No — not  guilty  only." 

"  Who  leads  for  the  defendant?" 

"  Mr.  Quicksilver." 

"Oh!— very  well.  We  must  have  the  consultation  to- 
morrow morning,  at  the  Castle— ten  minutes  before  the  sit- 
ting of  the  court.  I'm  rather  tired  to-night."  With  this  the 
great  leader  shook  hands  with  his  modest,  learned,  laborious 
junior— and  entered  bis  lodgings. 


S32  TEN  THOUSAND  A-YEAK. 

As  soon  as  Titmouse  had  been  ejected  from  the  court,  in 
the  summary  way  with  which  the  reader  will  remember, 
merely  on  account  of  his  having,  with  slight  indecorum, 
yielded  to  the  mighty  impulse  of  his  agitated  feelings,  he  be- 
gan to  cry  bitterly,  wringing  his  hands,  and  asking  every  one 
about  him  if  they  thought  he  could  get  in  again,  because  it 
was  his  case  that  was  going  on.  His  eyes  were  red  and  swol- 
len with  weeping ;  and  his  little  breast  throbbed  violently  as 
he  walked  to  and  fro  from  one  door  of  the  court  to  the  other. 
"  Oh,  gents  will  you  get  me  in  again  ?  "  said  he,  in  passionate 
tones,  approaching  two  gentlemen,  who,  with  a  very  anxious 
and  oppressed  air,  were  standing  together  at  the  outside  of 
one  of  the  doors— in  fact,  Lord  De  la  Zouch  and  Mr.  Aubrey ; 
and  they  quickly  recognized  in  Titmouse  the  gentleman 
whose  claims  were  being  at  that  instant  mooted  within  the 
court.  "  Will  you  get  me  in  ?  You  seem  such  respectable 
gents — 'Pon  my  soul  I'm  going  mad!  It's  my  case  that's 
going  on !  I'm  Mr.  Titmouse " 

"  We  have  no  power,  sir,  to  get  you  in,"  replied  Lord  De  la 
Zouch  haughtily :  so  coldly  and  sternly  as  to  cause  Titmouse 
involuntarily  to  shrink  from  him. 

"  The  court  is  crowded  to  the  very  door,  sir — and  we  really 
have  no  more  right  to  be  present  in  court,  or  get  others  into 
oc-urt,  than  you  have,"  said  Mr.  Aubrey,  with  mildness  and 
dignity. 

"  Thank  you,  sir !  Thank  you ! "  quoth  Titmouse,  moving 
with  an  apprehensive  air  away  from  Lord  De  la  Zouch,  to- 
wards Mr.  Aubrey.  "  Know  quite  well  who  you  are,  sir,  sorry 
to  do  all  this ;  but  law's  law,  and  right's  right,  all  the  world 
over." 

"  I  desire  you  to  leave  us,  sir,"  said  Lord  De  la  Zouch  with 
irrepressible  sternness ;  "  you  are  very  intrusive.  How  can 
we  catch  a  syllable  of  what  is  going  on  while  you  are  chatter- 
ing in  this  way?"  Titmouse  saw  that  Mr.  Aubrey  looked 
towards  him  with  a  very  different  expression  from  that  ex- 
hibited by  his  forbidding  companion,  and  would  perhaps  have 
stood  his  ground,  but  for  a  glimpse  he  caught  of  a  huge, 
powdered,  broad-shouldered  footman,  in  a  splendid  livery, 
one  of  Lord  De  la  Zouch's  servants,  who,  with  a  great  thick 
cane  in  his  hand,  was  standing  at  a  little  distance  behind,  in 
attendance  on  the  carriage,  which  was  standing  in  the  castle- 
yard.  This  man's  face  looked  so  ready  for  mischief,  that 
Titmouse  slowly  walked  off.  There  were  a  good  many  stand- 
ers-by,  who  seemed  all  to  look  with  dislike  and  distrust  at 
Titmouse.  He  made  many  ineffectual  attempts  to  persuade 
the  door-keeper,  who  had  assisted  in  his  extrusion,  to  re- 
admit him  ;  but  the  incorruptible  janitor  was  proof  against  a 
sixpence — even  against  a  smiling;  and  at  length  Titmouse 
gave  himself  up  to  despair,  and  thought  himself  the  most 
miserable  man  in  the  whole  world— as  very  probably,  indeed, 
he  was  :  for  consider  what  a  horrid  interval  of  suspense  he 


TEN  THOUSAND  A-YEAR.  333 

had  to  endure,  from  the  closing  of  Mr  Subtle's  speech  till  the 
delivery  of  the  verdict.  But  at  length,  through  this  portent, 
qus  and  apparently  impenetrable  cloud  burst  the  rich  sun- 
light of  success. 

•'  Mr.  Titmouse  !— Mr.  Titmouse  !— Mr.  Tit " 

"  Here !  Here  I  am !  Here !  "—exclaimed  the  little  fel- 
19 w,  jumping  off  the  window-seat  on  which  he  had  been 
sitting  for  the  last  hour  in  the  dark,  half  stupefied  with  grief 
and  exhaustion.  The  voice  that  called  him  was  a  blessed 
voice — a  familiar  voice — the  voice  of  Mr.  Gammon ;  who,  as 
soon  as  the  jury  began  to  come  back,  on  some  pretence  or 
other  had  quitted  his  seat  between  Quirk  and  Snap,  in  order, 
if  the  verdict  should  be  for  the  plaintiff,  to  be  the  very  first 
to  communicate  it  to  him.  In  a  moment  or  two  Mr.  Gam- 
mon had  grasped  both  Mr.  Titmouse's  hands.  "  My  dear, 
dear  Mr.  Titmouse,  I  congratulate  you !  You  are  victorious  ! 
God  grant  you  long  life  to  enjoy  your  fortune  !  God  bless 
you,  Titmouse!"  He  wrung  Titmouse's  hands — and  his 
voice  trembled  with  the  intensity  of  his  emotions.  Mr.  Tit- 
mouse had  gone  very  white,  and  for  a  while  spoke  not,  but 
stood  staring  at  Mr.  Gammon,  as  if  he  was  hardly  aware  of 
the  importance  of  his  communication. 

"No  — but— is  it  so?  Honor  bright?"  at  length  he 
stammered. 

"  It  is  indeed !  My  long  labors  are  at  length  crowned 
with  success !— Hurrah,  hurrah,  Mr.  Titmouse! 

"  I've  really  won  f  It  a'n't  a  joke  or  a  dream  ?  "  inquired 
Titmouse  with  quickly  increasing  excitement,  and  a  joyous 
expression  bursting  over  his  features,  which  became  sud- 
denly flushed. 

"  A  joke  ?— the  best  you'll  ever  have,  A  dream  ?— that  will 
last  your  life.  Thank  God,  Mr.  Titmouse,  the  battle's  ours  ; 
we've  defeated  all  their  villainy!  " 

"  Tol  de  rol !  Tol  de  rol !  Tol  de  lol,  lol,  lol,  rido  !— Ah !  " 
he  added  in  a  loud  truculent  tone,  as  Lord  de  la  Zouch  and 
Mr.  Aubrey  slowly  passed  him,—"  done  for  you  know — 'pon 
my  life !— turned  the  tables  I— that  for  you !  "  said  he,  snap- 
ping his  fingers  ;  but  I  need  hardly  say  that  he  did  so  with 
perfect  impunity  as  far  as  those  two  gentlemen  were  con- 
cerned, who  were  so  absorbed  with  the  grievous  event 
which  had  just  happened,  as  scarcely  to  be  aware  of  their 
being  addressed  at  all. 

"Aubrey,  it's  against  you— all  is  lost;  the  verdict  is  for 
the  plaintiff !"  said  Lord  De  la  Zouch  in  a  hurried  agitated 
whisper,  as  he  grasped  the  hand  of  Mr.  Aubrey,  whom  he 
had  quitted  for  an  instant  to  hear  the  verdict  pronounced. 
Mr.  Aubrey  for  some  moments  spoke  not. 

"  God's  will  be  done !  "  at  length  said  he  in  a  low  tone,  01? 
rather  in  a  faint  murmur,  More  than  a  dozen  gentlemen, 
who  came  crowding  out,  grasped  his  hand  wither  ea'j  energy 
and  vehemence. 


334  TEN  THOUSAND  A-YEAtt. 

"  God  bless  you,  Aubrey !  God  bless  you ! '' — said  several 
voices,  their  speakers  wringing  his  hand  with  great  ve- 
hemence as  they  spoke. 

"  Let  us  go,"  said  Lord  De  la  Zouch,  putting  Mr.  Aubrey's 
arm  in  his  own,  and  leading  him  away  from  a  scene  of  dis- 
tressing excitement,  too  powerful  for  his  exhausted  feelings. 

"  I  am  nothing  of  a  fatalist,"  said  Mr.  Aubrey,  after  a  pause 
of  some  minutes,  during  which  they  had  quitted  the  castle- 
gates,  and  his  feelings  had  recovered  from  the  shock  which 
they  had  iust  before  suffered  :— "  I  am  nothing  of  a  fatalist, 
but  I  ougnt  not  to  feel  the  least  surprise  at  this  issue,  for  I 
have  long  had  a  settled  conviction  that  such  would  be  the 
issue.  For  some  time  before  I  had  the  least  intimation  of 
the  commencement  of  these  proceedings,  I  was  oppressed  by 
a  sense  of  impending  calamity " 

"  Well,  that  may  be  so ;  but  it  does  not  follow  that  the  mis- 
chief is  finally  done." 

"  I  am  certain  of  it ! — But,  dear  Lord  De  la  Zouch,  how 
much  I  owe  to  your  kindness  and  sympathy !  "  said  Mr.  Au- 
brey with  a  slight  tremor  in  his  voice. 

"  We  are  at  this  moment,  Aubrey,  firmer  friends  than  we 
ever  were  before.  So  help  me  Heaven !  I  would  not  lose 
your  friendship  for  the  world ;  I  feel  it  a  greater  honor  than 
I  am  worthy  of— I  do,  indeed,"  said  Lord  De  la  Zouch  with 
great  emotion. 

"There's  a  great  gulf  between  us  though,  Lord  De  la 
Zouch,  as  far  as  worldly  circumstances  are  concerned — you 
a  peer  of  the  realm,  I  a  beggar." 

"  Forgive  me,  Aubrey,  but  it  is  idle  to  talk  in  that  way ;  I 
am  hurt  beyond  measure  at  your  supposing  it  possible  that 
under  any  circumstances " 

"  Believe  me,  I  feel  the  full  value  of  your  friendship— more 
valuable  at  this  moment  than  ever." 

"  That  a  serious  calamity  has  fallen  upon  you  is  certain  ;— 
which  of  us,  indeed,  is  safe  from  such  a  calamity?  But  who 
would  bear  it  with  the  calm  fortitude  which  you  have  al- 
ready evinced,  my  dear  Aubrey?" 

You  speak  very  kindly,  Lord  De  la  Zouch  ;  I  trust  I  shall 
play  the  man,  now  that  the  time  for  playing  a  man's  part  has 
come,"  said  Mr.  Aubrey  with  an  air  of  mingled  melancholy 
and  resolution.  "  I  feel  an  inexpressible  consolation  in  the 
reflection,  that  I  cannot  charge  myself  with  anything  uncon- 
scientious  ;  and,  as  for  the  future,  I  put  my  trust  in  God.  I 
I  feel  as  if  I  could  submit  to  the  will  of  Heaven  with  cheer- 
fulness— 

"  Don't  speak  so  despondingly,  Aubrey — 

"  Despondingly  ?  "  echoed  Mr.  Aubrey  with  momentary 
animation— "Despondingly?  My  clear  friend,  I  feel  as  if  I 
were  indeed  entering  a  scene  black  as  midnight— but  what 
is  it  to  the  valley  of  the  shadoio  of  death,  dear  Lord  De  la 
Zouch,  which  is  before  all  of  us,  and  at  but  a  little  distance  J 


TEN  THOUSAND  A-YEAE.  335 

I  assure  you  I  feel  no  vain-glorious  confidence  ;  yet  I  seem 
to  be  leaning  on  the  arm  of  an  unseen  but  all-powerful  sup- 
poiter ! " 

"  Y"ou  are  a  hero,  my  dear  Aubrey ! "  exclaimed  Lord  De 
la  Zouch  with  sudden  fervor. 

"  And  that  support  will  embrace  those  dearer  to  me  than 

life — dearer— far— far " He  ceased:  his  feelings  quite 

overcame  him,  and  they  walked  on  for  some  time  in  silence- 
Soon  afterwards  they  parted — for  Lord  De  la  Zouch  per- 
ceived that  his  unfortunate  companion  wished  to  be  alone. 
He  wrung  Mr.  Aubrey's  hands  in  silence ;  and  having 
turned  in  the  direction  of  his  hotel,  Mr.  Aubrey  made  for 
his  lodgings.  The  streets  were  occupied  by  passengers, 
some  returning  from  the  castle  after  the  great  trial  of  the 
day ;  others  standing  here  and  there,  in  little  knots,  con- 
versing as  he  passed  them ;  and  he  felt  conscious  that  the 
subject  of  their  thoughts  and  conversation,  was  himself  and 
his  fallen  fortunes.  Several  deep-drawn  sighs  escaped  him, 
as  he  walked  on,  the  herald  of  such  dismal  tidings,  to  those 
whom  he  loved :  and  he  felt  but  for  that  which  supported 
him  from  within,  as  it  were,  a  fallen  angel  so  far  as  con- 
cerned this  world's  honors  and  greatness.  The  splendors  of 
human  pomp  and  prosperity  seemed  rapidly  vanishing  in  the 
distance.  In  the  temporary  depression  of  his  spirits,  he  ex- 
perienced feelings  somewhat  akin  to  those  of  the  heart- 
sickened  exile,  whose  fond  eyes  are  riveted  upon  the 
mosques  and  minarets  of  his  native  city,  bathed  in  the  soft 
sunlight  of  evening,  where  are  the  cherished  objects  of  all 
his  tenderest  thoughts  and  feelings ;  while  his  vessel  is 
rapidly  bearing  him  from  it,  amid  the  rising  wind, 
the  increasing  and  ominous  swell  of  the  waters,  the 
thickening  gloom  of  night— whither?  The  Minster  clock 
struck  ten  as  he  passed  one  of  the  corners  of  the  vast  majes- 
tic structure,  gray-glistening  in  the  faint  moonlight.  The 
melodious  chimes  echoed  in  his  ear,  and  smote  his  subdued 
soul  with  a  sense  of  peculiar  solemnity  and  awe ;  they  forced 
upon  him  a  reflection  upon  the  transient  littleness  of  earthly 
things.  Then  he  thought  of  those  dear  beings  who  were 
awaiting  his  return,  and  a  gush  of  grief  and  tenderness  over- 
flowed his  heart,  as  he  quickened  his  steps,  with  an  in- 
ward and  fervent  prayer  that  Heaven  would  support  them 
under  the  misfortune'  which  had  befallen  them.  As  he  neared 
the  retired  row  of  houses  where  his  lodgings  were  situated 
he  imagined  that  he  saw  some  one  near  the  door  of  his  lodg- 
ings, as  if  on  the  lookout  for  his  approach;  and  who,  as  he 
drew  nearer,  at  length  entered  his  lodgings.  This  was  a  per- 
son whom  Mr.  Aubrey  did  not  at  all  suspect— it  was  his 
worthy  friend  Dr.  Tatham  ;  who,  unable  to  quit  Yatton  m 
time  to  hear  the  trial,  had  early  that  morning  mounted  his 
horse,  and,  after  a  long  and  hard  ride  reached  York  soon 
after  Mr.  Aubrey  had  set  off  for  the  castle.  Though  many 


836  TEN  THOUSAND  A-YEAR. 

of  the  country  people  then  in  York  were  aware  that  Mrs.  and 
Miss  Aubrey  \yere  also  there,  a  delicate  consideration  for  their 
exquisitely  distressing  situation  restrained  them  from  in- 
truding upon  their  privacy,  which  had  been  evidently  sought 
for  by  the  species  of  lodgings  which  Mr.  Aubrey  had  engaged. 
On  the  second  day,  the  excellent  Dr.  Tatham  had  been  their 
welcome  and  instructive  guest,  scarce  ever  leaving  them ; 
Mr.  Aubrey's  groom  bringing  word,  from  time  to  time,  from 
his  master  how  the  trial  went  on.  Late  in  the  evening, 
urged  by  Kate,  the  doctor  had  gone  off  to  the  castle,  to  wait 
till  he  could  bring  intelligence  of  the  final  result  of  the  trial. 
He  had  not  been  observed  by  Mr.  Aubrey  amidst  the  num- 
ber of  people  who  were  about ;  and  had  at  length  fulfilled 
his  mission,  and  been  beforehand  with  Mr.  Aubrey  in  com- 
municating the  unfortunate  issue  of  the  struggle.  The  in- 
stant that  Air.  Aubrey  had  set  his  foot  within  the  door,  he 
was  locked  in  the  impassioned  embrace  of  his  wife  and  sis- 
ter. None  of  them  spoke  for  some  moments. 

"  Dearest  Charles ! — we've  heard  it  all— we  know  it  all !  " 
at  length  they  exclaimed  in  a  breath.  "  Thank  God,  it  is  over 
at  last— and  we  know  the  worst !— Are  you  well,  dearest 
Charles  ?  "  inquired  Mrs.  Aubrey  with  fond  anxiety. 

"Thank  God,  my  Agnes,  I  am  well!  "said  Mr.  Aubrey, 
much  excited — "  and  thank  God  that  the  dreadful  suspense 
is  at  an  end ;  and  for  the  fortitude,  my  sweet  loves,  with 
which  you  bear  the  result.  And  how  are  you,  my  excellent 
friend?"  continued  he,  addressing  Dr.  Tatham,  and  grasping 
his  hands  ;  "  my  venerable  and  pious  friend — how  it  refreshes 
my  heart  to  see  you !  as  one  of  the  chosen  ministers  of  that 
God  whose  creatures  we  are,  and  whose  dispensations  we  re- 
ceive with  reverend  submission !  " 

"  God  Almighty  bless  you  all,  my  dear  friends ! "  replied 
Dr.  Tatham,  powerfully  affected.  "  Believe  that  all  this  is 
from  HIM  !  He  has  wise  ends  in  view,  though  we  see  not 
nor  comprehend  them !  Faint  not  when  ye  are  rebuked  of 
Him  !  If  ye  faint  in  the  day  of  adversity,  your  strength  is 
small !  But  I  rejoice  to  see  your  resignation !  " — Aubrey,  his 
wife,  and  sister,  were  for  a  while  overcome  with  their  emo- 
tions. 

"  I  assure  you  all,"  said  Aubrey,  "  I  feel  as  if  a  very  moun- 
tain had  been  lifted  off  my  heart !  How  blessed  am  1  in  such 
a  wife  and  sister ! "  A  heavenly  smile  irradiated  his  pale 
features— and  he  clasped  his  wife  and  then  his  sister  in  his 
arms.  They  wept  as  they  tenderly  returned  his  embrace. 

"  Heaven,  said  he, "'  that  gave  us  all,  has  taken  all :  why 
should  we  murmur  ?  He  will  enable  us,  if  we  pray  for  his 
assistance,  to  bear  with  equanimity  our  present  adversity,  as 
well  as  our  past  prosperity !  Come  Agnes !  Kate  !  play  the 
woman ! " 

Dr.  Tatham  sat  silent  by;  but  the  tears  ran  down  his 
cheeks.  At  length  Mr.  Aubrey  gave  them  a  general  accounts 


TEN  THOUSAND  A-YEAR.  337 

cf  what  had  occurred  at  the  trial— and  which,  I  need  hardly 
say,  was  listened  to  in  breathless  silence. 

';  Who  is  that  letter  from,  love,  lying  on  the  table  ?  "  in- 
quii°d  Mr.  Aubrey,  during  a  pause  in  the  conversation. 

"  It's  only  from  Johnson — dearest !  to  say  the  children  are 
quite  well,'  replied  Mrs.  Aubrey.  The  ruined  parents,  as  if 
by  a  common  impulse,  looked  unutterable  things  at  each 
other.  Then  the  mother  turned'  deadly  pale ;  and  her  hus- 
band tenderly  kissed  her  cold  cheek;  while  Kate  could 
scarcely  restrain  her  feelings.  The  excitement  of  each  was 
beginning  to  give  way  before  sheer  bodily  and  mental  ex- 
haustion ;  and  Dr.  Tatham,  observing  it,  rose  to  take  his  de- 
parture. It  was  arranged  that  the  carriage  should  be  at  the 
door  by  eight  o'clock  in  the  morning,  to  convey  them  back 
to  Yatton— and  that  Dr.  Tatham  should  breakfast  with, 
and  then  accompany  them  011  horseback.  He  then  took  his 
departure  for  the  night,  with  a  very  full  heart ;  and  those 
whom  he  had  left  soon  afterwards  retired  for  the  night ;  and 
having  first  invoked  the  mercy  and  pity  of  Heaven,  sank  in- 
to slumber  and  brief  forgetfulness  of  the  perilous  position  in 
which  they  had  been  placed  by  the  events  of  the  day. 

Somewhat  different  was  the  mode  in  which  the  night  was 
spent  by  the  victorious  party.  Gammon,  as  has  been  seen, 
was  the  first  to  congratulate  Titmouse  on  his  splendid  suc- 
cess. The  next  was  old  Quirk — who,  with  a  sort  of  convic- 
tion that  he  should  find  Gammon  beforehand  with  him — 
bustled  out  of  court,  leaving  Snap  to  pay  the  jury,  settle  the 
court-fees,  collect  the  papers,  and  so  forth.  Both  Quirk  and 
Snap  (as  soon  as  he  was  at  liberty)  exhibited  a  courtesy  to- 
wards Titmouse  which  had  a  strong  dash  of  reverence  in  it, 
such  as  was  due  to  the  possessor  of  ten  thousand  a  year ;  but 
Gammon  exhibited  the  tranquil  matter-of-fact  confidence  of 
a  man  who  had  determined  to  be,  and  indeed  knew  that  he 
was  the  entire  master  of  Titmouse. 

"  I— wish  you'd  call  a  coach,  or  something  of  that  sort, 
gents.— I'm  devilish  tired— I  am,  'pon  my  soul  f  "  said  Mr.  Tit- 
mouse yawning,  as  he  stood  on  the  steps  between  Quirk  and 
Gammon,  waiting  for  Snap's  arrival.  He  was,  in  fact,  almost 
mad — bursting  with  excitement;  and  could  not  stand  still  for 
a  moment.  Now  he  whistled  loudly  and  boldly ;  then  he  hum- 
med a  bar  or  two  of  some  low  comic  song ;  and  ever  and  anon 
drew  on  and  oft'  his  damp  gloves  with  an  air  of  petulant  im- 
petuosity. Now  he  ran  nis  hand  through  his  hair  with  care- 
less grace ;  and  then  with  arms  folded  on  his  breast  for  a 
moment,  looked  eagerly,  but  with  a  would-be  languid  air,  at 
two  or  three  elegant  equipages,  which  one  by  one,  with  their 
depressed  and  disappointed  inmates,  rolled  off.  At  length, 
Lord  Widdrington,  amidst  a  sharp  impetuous  cry  of  "  Make 
way  for  the  judge  there— make  way  for  his  lordship  !  "  ap- 
peared in  his  robes,  with  a  wearied  air ;  and  passing  close  by 
Titmouse,  was  honored  by  him  with  a  very  fine  bow  indeed 


338  TEN  THOUSAND  A-YEAB. 

— not  being  however,  in  the  least  aware  of  the  fact— as  ba 
passed  on  to  his  carriage.  The  steps  were  drawn  up ;  fie 
door  was  closed ;  and  amidst  a  sharp  blast  of  trumpets,  ihe 
carriage  drove  slowly  off  preceded  and  followed  by  the  usual 
attendants.  All  this  pomp  and  ceremony  made  a  very  deep 
impression  upon  the  mind  of  Titmouse.  "  Ah,"  thought  he, 
with  a  sudden  sigh  of  mingled  excitement  and  exhaustion — 
"  who  knows  but  7"may  be  a  judge  some  day?  It's  a  devilish 
pleasant  thing,  I'm  sure!  What  a  fuss  he  must  make 
wherever  he  goes  !  'Pon  my  life,  quite  delightful ! "  As  there 
was  no  coach  to  be  had,  Mr.  Titmouse  was  forced  to  walk 
home,  arm-in-arm  with  Mr.  Quirk  and  Mr.  Gammon,  and 
followed,  at  a  little  distance,  by  a  knot  of  persons,  acquaint- 
ed with  his  name  and  person,  and  feeling  towards  him  a 
strange  mixture  of  emotions — dislike,  wonder,  contempt,  ad- 
miration. Goodness  gracious  \  tnat  strange  little  gentleman 
was  now  worth,  it  was  said,  ton  thousand  a-year ;  and  was 
squire  of  Yatton !  !  Old  Quirk  snw.k  Titmouse's  hand  with 
irrepressible  enthusiasm,  at  least  a  dozen  times  on  their  way 
to  the  inn ;  while  Gammon  now  and  then  squeezed  his  arm, 
and  spoke,  in  an  earnest  tone,  of  the  difficuiti  ss  yet  to  be 
overcome.  On  reaching  the  inn,  the  landlady,  who  was 
standing  at  the  door,  and  had  evidently  been  on  the  iook-out 
for  her  suddenly  distinguished  guest,  received  him  with 
several  most  profound  curtsies,  and  most  eager  and  respect- 
ful inquiries  about  his  health,  as  he  had  had  no  luncheon — 
and  asking  what  he  would  be  pleased  to  have  for  his  supper. 
She  added,  moreover,  that  fearing  his  former  bedroom  might 
not  have  been  to  his  mind,  she  had  changed  it,  and  he  would 
that  night  sleep  in  the  very  best  she  had. 

"  We  must  make  a  night  ori't  eh  ?  "  quoth  Mr.  Quirk,  with 
an  excited  air.  His  partners  assented  to  it,  as  did  Mr.  Tit- 
mouse ;  and  cold  beef,  sausages,  fo\vl,  ham,  beef-steaks,  and 
mutton-chops,  were  ordered  to  be  in  readiness  in  half-an- 
hour's  time.  Soon  afterwards  Mr.  Titmouse  followed  the 
chambermaid  to  his  new  bedroom. 

"  This  is  the  room  we  always  give  to  quality  folk— when  we 
get  them,"  said  she,  as  she  sat  his  candle  on  the  drawers,  and 
looked  with  a  little  triumph  around  the  room. 

"Ah — yes! — 'pon  my  soul — quite  right— always  do  your 
best  for  quality  !— Lovely  gal— eh  ?  "  Here  he  chuckled  her 
under  the  chin,  and  seemed  disposed  to  imprint  a  kiss  upon 
her  cheek :  but,  with  a  "  Lord,  sir— that's  not  the  way  quali- 
ty folks  behave !  "  she  modestly  withdrew.  Titmouse,  left 
alone,  first  threw  himself  on  the  bed  ;  then  started  off,  and 
walked  about :  then  sat  down ;  then  danced  about ;  then  took 
off  his  coat ;  then  threw  himself  on  the  bed  again ;  hummed, 
whistled,  jumped  up  again— in  a  sort  of  wild  ecstasy,  or  de 
lirium.  In  short,  it  is  plain  that  he  was  not  master  of  himself 
In  fact,  his  little  mind  was  as  agitated  by  the  day's  event,  as 
a  small  green  puddle  by  the  roadside  for  a  while  would  be 


TEN  THOUSAND  A-YEAE.  339 

on  a  stone  being  suddenly  flung  into  it  by  a  child.  "While 
Messrs.  Quirk  and  Snap  were,  alter  their  sort,  as  excited  as 
even  Mr.  Titmouse  was,  Gammon,  retiring  to  his  bedroom, 
and  ordering  thither  pens,  ink,  and  paper,  sat  down  ana 
wrote  the  following  letter  :— 

"  York,  5th  April,  18— 

"  MY  DEAR  SIR — The  very  first  leisure  moment  I  have,  I 
devote  to  informing  you,  as  one  of  the  most  intimate  friends 
of  our  highly  respected  client,  Mr.  Titmouse,  of  this  brilliant 
event  which  has  just  occurred.  After  a  most  severe  and  pro- 
tracted struggle  of  two  days,  (the  Attorney-General  having 
come  clown  special  on  the  other  side,)  the  jury,  many  of  them 
the  chief  gentlemen  of  the  county,  have  within  the  last  hour 
returned  a  verdict  in  favor  of  our  common  friend,  Mr.  Tit- 
mouse—thereby declaring  him  entitled  to  the  whole  of  the 
estates  at  Yatton,  (ten  thousand  a-year  rent-roll,  at  least,) 
and,  by  consequence,  to  an  immense  accumulation  of  bygone 
rents,  which  must  be  made  up  to  him  by  his  predecessor, 
who,  with  all  his  powerful  party,  and  in  spite  of  the  unscru- 
pulous means  resorted  to  to  defeat  the  ends  of  justice,  is  dis- 
mayed beyond  expression  at  the  result  of  this  grand  struggle 
—-unprecedented  in  the  annals  of  modern  litigation.  The  re- 
sult has  given  lively  satisfaction  in  these  parts— it  is  plain 
that  our  friend  Mr.  Titmouse  will  very  soon  become  a  great 
lion  in  society. 

''  To  you,  my  dear  sir,  as  an  early  and  valued  friend  of  our 
interesting  client,  I  sit  down  to  communicate  the  earliest  in- 
telligence of  this  most  important  event ;  and  I  trust  that  you 
will,  with  our  respectful  compliments,  communicate  this 
happy  event  to  your  amiable  family — who,  I  am  persuaded, 
must  ever  feel  a  very  warm  interest  in  our  client's  welfare. 
He  is  now,  naturally  enough,  much  excited  with  his  extraor- 
dinary good  fortune,  to  which  we  are  only  too  proud  and  hap- 
py to  have  contributed  by  our  humble,  but  strenuous  and 
long-continued  exertions.  He  begs  me  to  express  his  most 
cordial  feelings  towards  you,  and  to  say  that,  on  his  return 
to  town,  Satin  Lodge  will  be  one  of  the  very  first  places  at 
which  he  will  call.  In  the  mean  time,  I  beg  you  will  believe 
me,  my  dear  sir,  with  the  best  compliments  of  myself  and 
partners,  yours  most  sincerely, 

"  OILY  GAMMON. 
"  THOMAS  TAG-RAG,  ESQ. 
etc.  etc.  etc." 

"  That,  I  think,  will  about  do  " — quoth  Gammon  to  him- 
self, with  a  thoughtful  air,  as,  having  made  an  exact  copy  of 
the  above  letter,  he  sealed  it  up  and  directed  it.  He  then 
came  down-stairs  to  supper,  having  first  sent  the  letter  off  to 
the  post-office.  What  a  merry  meal  was  that  same  supper ! 
Mr.  Titmouse,  Mr.  Quirk,  and  Mr.  Snap,  ate  almost  to  burst- 
ing :  Gammon  was  more  abstinent — but  overpowered  by  the 


340  TEN  THOUSAND  A-TEAE. 

importunities  of  his  companions,  took  a  far  greater  quantity 
than  usual  of  the  bouncing  bottled  porter,  the  hard  port,  and 
fiery  sherry,  which  his  companions  drank  as  if  they  nad  been 
but  water.  Then  came  in  the  spirits — with  hot  water  and 
cold ;  and  to  these  all  present  did  ample  iustice  ;  in  fact,  it 
was  very  hard  for  any  one  to  resist  the  other's  entreaties. — 
Mr.  Gammon  in  due  time  felt  himself  going — but  seemed  as 
if,  on  such  an  occasion,  he  had  no  help  for  it.  Every  one  of 
thepartners,  at  different  stages  of  the  evening,  made  a  speech 
to  Titmouse,  and  proposed  his  health  ;  who,  of  course,  replied 
to  each,  and  drank  the  health  of  each.  Presently  old  Quirk 
sang  a  comic  song,  in  a  very  dismal  key ;  and  then  he  and 
Snap  joined  in  one  called  "  Handcuff  \.  Halter ;  at  which 
Gammon  laughed  heartily  and  listened  with  that  degree  of 
pleased  attention,  which  showed  that  he  had  resolved,  for 
once  at  least,  to  aband9n  himself  to  the  enjoyment  of  the 
passing  hour.  Then  Titmouse  began  to  speak  of  what  he 
should  do  as  soon  as  he  had  "  touched  the  shiners  "—his  com- 
panions entering  into  all  his  little  schemes  with  a  sort  of  af- 
fectionate enthusiasm.  At  length  old  Mr.  Quirk,  after  by 
turns  laughing,  crying,  singing,  and  talking,  leaned  back 
in  his  chair,  with  his  naif-emptied  tumbler  of  brandy  and 
water  in  his  hand,  and  fell  fast  asleep.  Gammon  also,  in 
spite  of  all  he  could  do,  began  the  deuce  take  it ! — to  feel 
and  exhibit  the  effects  of  a  hasty  and  hearty  meal,  and  his 
very  unusual  potations,  especially  after  such  long  abstin- 
ence and  intense  anxiety  as  he  had  experienced  during  the  pre- 
vious two  days.  He  had  intended  to  have  seen  them  all  un- 
der the  table ;  but  he  began  gradually  to  feel  a  want  of  con- 
trol over  himself,  his  thoughts,  and  "feelings,  which  a  little 
disquieted  him,  as  he  now  and  then  caught  glimpses  of  the 
extent  to  which  it  was  proceeding.  "  In  vino  veritas?  prop- 
erlv  translated,  means — that  when  a  man  is  fairly  under  the 
influence  of  liquor,  you  see  a  strong  manifestation  of  his  real 
character.  The  vain  man  is  vainer ;  the  voluble,  more  volu- 
ble ;  the  morose,  more  morose ;  the  passionate,  more  passion- 
ate; the  detractor,  more  detracting;  the  sycophant,  more 
sycophantic,  and  so  forth.  Now  Mr.  Gammon  was  a  cold, 
cautious,  long-headed  schemer ;  and  as  the  fumes  of  liquor 
mounted  up  into  his  head,  they  only  increased  the  action  and 
intensity  of  those  qualities  for  which,  when  sober,  he  was  so 
pre-eminently  distinguished,  only  that  there  was  a  half-con- 
scious want  of  coherency  and  subordination.  The  impulse 
and  the  habit  were  present ;  but  there  seemed  a  strange  dis- 
turbing force :  in  short — what  is  the  use  of  disguising  mat- 
ters ?— Mr.  Gammon  was  getting  very  drunk ;  and  he  felt 
very  sorry  for  it— but  it  was  too  late.  In  due  time  the  dis- 
mal effort  not  to  appear  drunk,  ceased — a  great  relief !  Si- 
lent and  more  silent  he  became ;  more  and  more  observant 
of  the  motions  of  Snap  and  Titmouse ;  more  and  more  com- 
plicated and  profound  in  his  schemes  and  purposes ;  and  at 


TEN  THOUSAND  A-YEAR.  341 

length  he  felt  as  if,  by  some  incomprehensible  means,  he 
were  taking  himself  hi— inveigling  himself  :  at  which  point, 
after  a  vain  attempt  to  understand  his  exact  position  with 
reference  to  himself,  he  slowly,  but  rather  unsteadily  rose 
from  his  chair ;  looked  with  an  unsettled  eye  at  Titmouse  for 
nearly  a  minute ;  a  queer  smile  now  and  then  flitted  across  his 
features;  and  he  presently  rang  the  bell.  Boots  having 
obeyed  the  summons,  Gammon  with  a  very  turbid  brain 
followed  him  to  the  door,  with  a  most  desperate  effort  to  walk 
thither  steadily — but  in  vain.  Having  reached  his  room,  he 
sat  down  with  a  sort  of  suspicion  that  he  had  said  or  done 
something  to  commit  himself,  Vain  was  the  attempt  to 
wind  up  his  watch  ;  and  at  length  he  gave  it  up  with  a  faint 
curse.  With  only  one  stocking  off,  conceiving  himself  to  be 
undressed,  after  four  or  five  times  trying  to  blow  out  his 
candle  in  vain,  he  succeeded  and  got  into  bed ;  his  head  how- 
ever, occupying  the  place  in  the  bed  assigned  to  his  feet.  He 
lay  asleep  for  about  half-an-hour-and  then  experienced  certain 
insupportable  sensations.  He  was  indeed  very  miserable; 
and  lost  all  thoughts  of  what  would  become  of  Titmouse— of 
Quirk  and  Snap — in  his  own  indisposition. 

"  I  say,  Snap,''  quoth  Titmouse  with  a  grin,  and  putting  his 
finger  to  his  nose,  as  soon  as  Gammon  had  quitted  the  room 
in  the  manner  above  described — "  Mr.  Quirk  a'n't  much 
company  for  us  now,  eh  ?  Shall  we  go  out  and  have  some 
fun  ?  " 

"  Walk  will  do  us  good — yes.  Go  where  you  like,  Tit- 
mouse," replied  Snap,  who,  though  young,  was  a  thoroughly 
seasoned  vessel,  and  could  hold  a  great  deal  of  drink  without 
seeming  or  really  being  much  the  worse  for  it.  As  for  Tit- 
mouse, nappily  for  him !  (seeing  that  he  "\yas  so  soon  to  have 
the  command  of  unlimited  means,  unless  indeed  the  envious 
fates  should  in  the  meantime  interpose  to  dash  the  brimful 
cup  from  his  eager  lips,)  he  was  becoming  more  and  more  ac- 
customed to  the  effects  of  drink ;  which  had,  up  to  the  mo- 
ment I  am  speaking  of,  no  other  effect  than  to  elevate  his 
spirits  up  to  the  pitch  of  indefinite  daring  and  enterprise. 
"  'Pon  my  life,  Snap,  couldn't  we  stand  another  tumbler — eh? 
•  Warm  us  for  the  night  air  ? '  "  What  shall  it  be  ?  "  quoth 
Snap,  ringing  the  bell—"  whisky?" 

"  Devil  knows,  and  devil  cares  !  "  replied  Mr.  Titmouse 
recklessly ;  and  presently  there  stood  betore  the  friends  two 
steaming" tumblers  of  what  they  had  ordered.  Immediately 
after  disposing  of  them,  the  two  gentleman,  quite  up  to  the 
mark,  as  they  expressed  it — each  with  a  cigar  in  his  mouth 
—sallied  forth  in  quest  of  adventures.  Titmouse  felt  that 
he  had  now  become  a  gentleman ;  and  his  taste  and  feelings 
prompted  him  to  pursue,  as  early  as  possible,  a  gentle- 
manly line  of  conduct— particularly  in  his  amusements.  It 
was  now  past  twelve ;  and  the  narrow  old-fashioned  streets 
pf  York,  silent  and  deserted,  formed  a  strong  contrast  to  the 


342  TEN  THOUSAND  A-YEAE. 

streets  of  London  at  the  same  hour,  and  seemed  scarcely  to 
admit  of  much  sport.  But  sport  our  friends  were  determined 
to  have;  and  the  night  air  aiding  the  effect  of  their  mis- 
cellaneous potations,  they  soon  became  somewhat  excited 
and  violent.  Yet  it  seemed  difficult  to  get  up  a  row — for  no 
one  was  visible  in  any  direction.  Snap, liowever,  by  way  of 
making  a  beginning,  suddenly  shouted  "  fire  !  "  at  the  top 
of  his  voice,  and  Titmouse  joined  him ;  when  having  heard 
half-a-dozen  windows  hastily  thrown  up  by  the  dismayed 
inhabitants  whom  the  alarming  sounds  had  aroused  from 
sleep,  they  scampered  off  at  their  top  speed.  In  another  part  of 
the  town,  they  yelled,  and  whistled,  and  croAved  like  cocks, 
and  mewed  like  cats — the  last  two  being  accomplishments  in 
which  Titmouse  was  very  eminent— and  again  took  to  their 
heels.  Then  they  contrived  to  twist  a  few  knockers  off  doors, 
pull  bells,  and  break  a  few  windows  ;  and  while  exercising 
their  skill  in  this  last  branch  of  the  night's  amusement,  Tit- 
mouse, in  the  very  act  of  aiming  a  stone  which  took  effect  in 
the  middle  of  a  bed-room  window,  was  surprised  by  an  old 
watchman  waddling  round  the  corner.  He  was  a  feeble 
asthmatic  old  man ;  so  Snap  knocked  him  down  at  once,  and 
Titmouse  blew  out  the  candle  in  his  lantern,  which  he  then 
jumped  upon  and  smashed  to  pieces,  and  knocked  its  pros- 
trate owner's  hat  over  his  eyes.  Snap,  on  some  strange  un- 
accountable impulse,  wrested  the  rattle  out  of  the  poor 
creature's  hand,  and  sprang  it  loudly.  This  brought  several 
other  old  watchmen  from  different  quarters;  and  aged 
numbers  prevailing  against  youthful  spirit— the  two  gentle- 
men, after  a  considerable  scuffle,  were  overpowered  and  con- 
veyed to  the  cage.  Snap  having  muttered  something  about 
demanding  to  look  at  the  warrant,  and  then  about  a  malicious 
arrest  and  false  imprisonment,  sank  on  a  form,  and  then 
down  upon  the  floor,  and  fell  fast  asleep.  Titmouse  for  a 
while  showed  a  very  resolute  front,  and  swore  a  great  many 
oaths,  that  he  would  fight  the  Boots  at  the  inn  for  five 
shillings,  if  he  dared  show  himself  ;  but  all  of  a  sudden,  his 
spirit  collapsed,  as  it  were,  and  he  sank  on  the  floor  and  was 
grievously  indisposed  for  some  hours.  About  nine  o'clock,  the 
contents  of  the  cage— viz.  Snap,  Titmouse,  two  farmers'  boys 
who  had  been  caught  stealing  cakes,  an  old  beggar,  and  a 
young  pickpocket — were  conveyed  before  the  Lord  Mayor, 
to  answer  for  their  several  misdeads.  Snap  was  woefully 
crest-fallen.  He  had  sent  for  the  landlord  of  the  inn  where 
they  had  put  up  to  come,  on  their  behalf,  to  the  Mansion- 
House ;  but  he  told  Quirk  of  the  message  he  had  received. 
Mr  Quirk,  finding  that  Gammon  could  not  leave  his  room 
through  severe  indisposition — the  very  first  time  that  Mr. 
Quirk  had  ever  seen  or  heard  of  his  being  so  overtaken—- 
set  off,  in  a  very  mortified  and  angry  mood,  in  quest  of  his 
hopeful  client  and  junior  partner.  They  were  in  a  truly  dis- 
mal pickle.  Titmouse  cale  »/*•  death,  his  clothes  disordered, 


TEN  THOUSAND  A-YEAE.  343 

and  one  of  his  shirt-collars  torn  off ;  Snap  sat  beside  him 
with  a  sheepish  air,  looking  as  if  he  could  hardly  keep  his 
eyes  open.  At  him  Mr.  Quirk  looked  with  keen  indignation, 
but  spoke  not  to  him  nor  for  him :  for  Titmouse,  however, 
he  expressed  great  commiseration,  and  entreated  his  lord- 
ship to  overlook  the  little  misconduct  of  which  he  (Titmouse) 
in  a  moment  of  extreme  excitement,  had  been  guilty,  on  con- 
dition of  making  amends  for  the  injury,  both  to  person  and 
property,  of  which  he  had  been  guilty.  By  this  time  his  lord- 
ship had  become  aware  of  the  names  and  circumstances  of  the 
two  delinquents ;  and,  after  lecturing  them  very  severely,  he 
fined  them  five  shillings  a-piece  for  being  drunk,  and  per- 
mitted them  to  be  discharged,  on  their  promising  never  to 
offend  in  the  like  way  again,  and  paying  three  pounds  by 
way  of  compensation  to  the  watchman,  and  one  or  two 
persons  whose  knockers  they  were  proved  to  have  wrench- 
ed off,  and  windows  to  have  broken.  His  lordship  had  delay- 
ed the  case  of  Messrs.  Snap  and  Titmouse  to  the  last ;  chiefly 
because,  as  soon  as  he  had  found  out  who  Mr.  Titmouse  was, 
it  occurred  to  him  that  he  would  make  a  sort  of  little  start  at 
the  great  ball  to  be  given  by  the  Lady  Mayoress  that  evening. 
As  soon,  therefore,  as  the  charge  had  been  disposed  of,  his 
lordship  desired  Mr.  Titmouse  to  follow  him,  for  a  moment, 
to  his  private  room.  There,  having  shut  the  door,  he  gently 
chided  Mr.  Titmouse  for  the  indiscretion  of  which  he  had 
been  guilty,  and  of  which  it  was  not  to  have  been  expected 
that  a  gentleman  of  his  consequence  in  the  county  would  be 
guilty.  His  lordship  begged  him  to  consider  the  station 
which  he  was  now  called  to  occupy ;  and,  in  alluding  to  the 
signal  event  of  the  preceding  day,  warmly  congratulated  him 
upon  it :  and,  by  the  way,  his  lordship  trusted  that  Mr.  Tit- 
mouse would,  in  the  evening,  favor  the  Lady  Mayoress  and 
himself  with  his  company  at  the  ball,  where  they  would  be 
very  proud  of  the  opportunity  of  introducing  him  to  some  of 
the  gentry  of  the  county,  amongst  whom  his  future  lot  in 
life  was  likely  to  be  cast.  Mr.  Titmouse  listened  to  all  this 
as  if  he  were  in  a  dream.  His  brain  (the  little  of  it  that  he 
had)  was  yet  in  a  most  unsettled  state ;  as  also  was  his 
stomach.  When  he  heard  the  words  "  Lady  Mayoress," 
"  ball,"  "  mansion-house,"  "  gentry  of  the  county,"  and  so 
forth,  a  dim  vision  of  splendor  flashed  before  his  eyes ;  and, 
with  a  desperate  effort,  he  assured  the  Lord  Mayor  that  he 
should  be  very  uncommon  proud  to  accept  the  invitation,  if 
he  were  well  enough— but  just  then  he  was  uncommon  ill. 

His  lordship  pressed  him  to  take  a  glass  of  water,  to  re- 
vive him  and  settle  his  stomach  ;  but  Mr.  Titmouse  declined 
it,  and  soon  afterwards  quitted  the  room  ;  and,  leaning  on 
the  arm  of  Mr.  Quirk,  set  off  homeward— Snap  walking  be- 
side him  in  silence,  with  a  very  quaint  disconcerted  air— not 
being  taken  the  least  notice  of  by  Mr.  Quirk.  ^  As  they  pass- 
ed along,  they  encountered  several  of  the  barristers  on  thei? 


344  TEN  THOUSAND  A-YEAE. 

way  to  court,  and.  others,  who  recognized  Titmouse ;  and 
with  a  smile,  evidently  formed  a  pretty  accurate  guess  as  to 
the  manner  in  which  the  triumph  of  the  preceding  day  had 
been  celebrated.  Mr.  Quirk,  finding  that  Mr.  Gammon  was 
far  too  much  indisposed  to  think  of  quitting  York,  at  all 
events  till  a  late  hour  in  the  evening,  and,  indeed,  that  Tit- 
mouse was  similarly  situated— with  a  very  bad  grace  con- 

'  sented  to  them  stopping  behind ;  and  himself,  with  Snap — 
the  former  inside,  the  latter  outside— having  settled  with 
most  of  the  witnesses,  leaving  the  remainder,  with  their  own 
expenses  at  the  inn,  to  be  settled  by  Mr.  Gammon— set  off 
for  town  by  the  two  o'clock  coach.  It  was,  indeed,  high 
time  for  them  to  return  ;  for  the  oppressed  inmates  of  New- 
gate were  getting  wild  on  account  of  the  protracted  absence 
of  their  kind  and  confidential  advisers.  When  they  left, 
both  Ganimon  and  Titmouse  were  in  bed.  The  former, 
however,  began  to  revive,  shortly  after  the  coach  which  con- 
veyed away  his  respected  co-partners,  and  the  guard's  horn 
had  ceased  to  be  heard ;  and  about  an  hour  afterwards  he 
descended  from  his  room,  a  great  deal  the  better  for  the 
duties  of  the  toilette,  and  a  bottle  of  soda-water  with  a  little 
brandy  in  it.  A  cup  of  strong  tea,  and  a  slice  or  two  of  dry 
toast,  set  him  entirely  to  rights, — and  then  Gammon — the 
calm,  serene,  astute  Gammon — was  "himself  again."  Had 
he  said  anything  indiscreet,  or  in  any  way  committed  him- 
self overnight? — thought  he,  as  he  sat  alone,  with  folded 
arms,  trying  to  recollect  what  had  taken  place.  He  hoped 
not — but  had  no  means  of  ascertaining.  Then  he  entered 
upon  a  long  and  anxious  consideration  of  the  position  of 
affairs,  since  the  great  event  of  the  preceding  evening.  The 
only  definite  object  which  he  had  had  in  view,  personally,  in 
entering  into  the  affair,  was  the  obtaining  that  ascendancy 
over  Titmouse,  in  the  event  of  his  becoming  possessed  of 
the  magnificent  fortune  they  were  in  quest  of  for  him,  which 
might  enable  him,  in  one  way  or  another,  to  elevate  his  own 
position  in  society,  and  secure  for  himself  permanent  and 
solid  advantages.  In  the  progress  of  the  affair,  however, 

,  new  views  presented  themselves  to  his  mind. 

Towards  the  close  of  the  afternoon,  Titmouse  recovered 
sufficiently  to  make  his  appearance  down-stairs.  Soon  after- 
wards, Ganimon  proposed  a  walk,  as  the  day  was  fine,  and 
the  brisk  fresh  country  air  would  be  efficacious  in  restoring 
Titmouse  to  his  wonted  health  and  spirits.  His  suggestion 
was  adopted;  and  soon  afterwards  might  have  been  seen,  Gam- 
mon, supporting  on  his  arm  his  languid  and  interesting- 
client,  Mr.  Titmouse,  making  their  way  to  the  river ;  along 
whose  quiet  and  pleasing  banks  they  walked  for  nearly  a 
couple  of  hours  in  close  conversation ;  during  which,  Gam- 
mon, by  repeated  and  various  efforts,  succeeded  in  produc- 
ing an  impression  on  Titmouse's  mind,  that  the  good  fort- 
une which  seemed  now  within  his  reach,  had  been  secured, 


TEN  THOUSAND  A-TEAE.  345 

for  him  by  the  enterprise,  skill  and  caution  of  one,  Mr.  Gam- 
mon, only ;  who  would,  moreover,  continue  to  devote  him- 
self to  Mr.  Titmouse's  interest,  and  protect  him  from  the 
designs  of  those  who  would  endeavor  to  take  advantage  of 
him.  Mr.  Gammon  also  dropped  one  or  two  vague  hints  that 
his— Titmouse's— continuance  in  the  enjoyment  of  the  Yat- 
ton  property,  would  always  depend  upon  the  will  and  power 
of  him,  the  aforesaid  Gammon ;  in  whose  hands  were  most 
unsuspected,  but  potent  weapons.  And,  indeed,  it  is  not  at 
all  impossible  that  such  may  prove  to  be  really  the  case. 

What  a  difference  is  there  between  man  and  man,  in 
temper,  and  disposition,  and  intellect !  Compare  together 
the  two  individuals  now  walking  slowly,  arm-in-arm,  beside 
the  sweet  Ouse ;  and  supposing  one  to  have  designs  upon 
the  other — disposed  to  ensnare  and  overreach  him — wnat 
chance  has  the  shorter  gentleman?  Compare  even  their 
countenances— what  a  difference ! 

Gammon  heard  with  uneasiness  of  Titmouse's  intention  to 
go  to  the  Lady  Mayoress's  ball  that  evening  ;  and,  for  many 
reasons,  resolved  that  he  should  not.  In  vain,  however,  did 
Gammon  try  to  persuade  him  that  he  was  asked  only  to  be 
turned  into  ridicule,  for  that  almost  everybody  there  would 
be  in  the  interest  of  the  Aubreys,  and  bitterly  opposed  to 
him,  Mr.  Titmouse ;  in  spite  of  these  and  all  other  repre- 
sentations, Titmouse  expressed  his  determination  to  go  to 
the  ball :  on  which,  Gammon,  with  a  good-natured  smile,  ex- 
claimed, "Well,  well!" — and  withdrew  his  opposition. 
Shortly  after  their  return  from  their  walk,  they  sat  down  to 
dinner ;  and  Gammon,  with  a  cheerful  air,  ordered  a  bottle 
of  champagne,  of  which  he  drank  about  a  glass  and  a  half, 
and  Titmouse  the  remainder.  That  put  him  into  a  humor 
to  take  more  wine,  without  much  pressing ;  and  he  swallow- 
ed, in  rapid  succession,  a  glass  of  ale,  and  seven  or  eight 
glasses  of  port  and  sherry.  By  this  time  he  had  forgotten 
all  about  the  ball,  and  clamored  for  brandy  and  water. 
Gammon,  however,  saw  that  his  end  was  answered.  Poor 
Titmouse  was  becoming  rapidly  more  and  more  helpless : 
and  within  half-an-hour  s  time  was  assisted  to  his  bed-room 
in  a  very  sad  state.  Thus  Gammon  had  the  satisfaction  of 
seeing  his  benevolent  design  accomplished,  although  it 
pained  him  to  think  of  the  temporary  inconvenience  occa- 
sioned to  the  unconscious  sufferer ;  who  had,  however,  es- 
caped the  devices  of  those  who  wished  publicly  to  expose 
his  inexperience  ;  and  as  for  the  means  which  Gammon  had 
resorted  to  in  order  to  effect  his  purpose,— why,  he  may  be 
supposed  to  have  had  a  remoter  object  in  view,  viz.  early  to 
disgust  him  with  intemperance. 

Alas!  how  disappointed  were  the  Mayor  and  Mayoress, 
that  their  queer  little  lion  did  not  make  his  appearance  in 
the  gay  and  brilliant  scene !  How  many  had  they  told  that 
he  was  coming !  The  three  daughters  were  almost  bursting 


346  TEN  THOUSAND  A-TEAB. 

with  vexation  and  astonishment.  They  had  been  disposed 
to  entertain  a  warmer  feeling  than  that  of  mere  curiosity  to- 
wards the  new  owner  of  an  estate  worth  ten  thousand  a-year 
— had  drawn  lots  which  of  them  was  first  to  dance  with 
him  ;  and  had  told  all  their  friends  on  which  of  them  the  lot 
had  fallen ;  then,  again,  many  of  the  county  people  inquired, 
from  time  to  time,  of  the  chagrined  little  mayor  and  mayor- 
ess, when  "  Mr.  Ticklemouse,"  "  Mr.  Tipmouse,"  "  Mr.  Tip 
Elebattle,"  or  "  whatever  his  name  might  be,"  was  coming ; 
ill  of  real  curiosity,  much  tinctured,  however,  with  disgust 
and  contempt,  to  see  the  stranger,  who  had  suddenly  acquir- 
ed so  commanding  a  station  in  the  county,  so  strong  a  claim 
to  their  sympathy  and  respect. 

Then,  again,  there  was  a  very  great  lion  there,  exhibiting 
for  a  short  time  only,  who  also  wished  to  see  the  little  lion, 
and  expressed  keen  regrets  that  it  was  not  there  according 
to  appointment.  The  great  lion  was  Mr.  Quicksilver,  who 
had  stepped  in  for  about  half-an-hour,  merely  to  show  him- 
self ;  and  when  he  heard  of  the  expected  arrival  of  his  little 
client,  it  occurred  to  Mr.  Quicksilver,  Avho  could  see  several 
inches  beyond  by  no  means  a  short  nose,  that  Mr.  Titmouse 
had  gained  a  verdict  that  would  very  soon  make  him  patron 
of  the  borough  of  Yatton— that  he  probably  would  not  think 
of  sitting  for  the  borough  himself,  and  that  a  little  public 
civility  bestowed  upon  Mr.  Titmouse,  by  the  great  Mr. 
Quicksilver,  one  of  the  counsel  to  whose  splendid  exertions 
he  was  indebted  for  his  all,  might  be,  as  it  were,  bread 
thrown  upon  the  waters,  to  be  found  after  many  days.  It  was 
true  that  Mr.  Quicksilver,  in  a  bitter  stream  of  eloquent 
invective,  had  repeatedly  denounced  the  system  of  close  and 
rotten  boroughs ;  but  his  heart,  all  the  while,  secretly  re- 
belled ;  and  he  knew  that  a  snug  borough  was  a  thing  on 
every  account  not  to  be  sneezed  at.  He  sat  for  one  himself, 
though  he  had  also  contested  several  counties :  but  that  was 
expensive  and  harassing  work :  and  the  borough  for  which 
he  at  present  sat,  he  had  paid  far  too  high  a  price  for.  He 
had  no  objection  to  the  existence  of  close  boroughs ;  but 
only  to  so  many  of  them  being  in  the  hands  of  the  opposite 
party ;  and  the  legislature  hath  since  recognized  the  distinc- 
tion, and  acted  upon  it.  Here,  however,  was  the  case  of  a 
borough  which  was  going  to  change  hands,  and  pass  from 
Tory  to  Whig,  and  could  Mr.  Quicksilver  fail  to  watch  it 
witn  interest.  Was  he,  therefore,  to  neglect  this  opportu- 
nity of  slipping  in  for  Yatton — and  the  straw  moving,  too,  in 
town — a  general  election  looked  for  ?  So  Mr.  Quicksilver 
really  regretted  the  absence  of  his  little  friend  and  client, 
Mr.  Titmouse. 

Thus,  and  by  such  persons,  and  on  such  grounds,  was 
lamented  the  absence  of  Mr.  Titmouse  from  the  ball  of  the 
Lady  Mayoress  of  York ;  none,  however,  knowing  the  cause 
which  kept  him  from  so  select  and  distinguished  an  assembly. 


TEN  THOUSAND  A-TEAU.  34', 

As  soon  as  Mr.  Gammon  had  seen  him  properly  attended  to, 
and  expressed  an  anxious  sympathy  for  him,  he  set  out  for  a 
walk— a  quiet  solitary  walk  round  the  ancient  walls  of 
York.  If  on  a  fine  night  you  look  up  into  the  sky,  and  see  it 
gleaming  with  innumerable  stars,  and  then  fix  your  eye  in- 
tently, without  wavering,  upon  some  one  star  ;  however  vivid 
and  brilliant  may  be  those  in  its  immediate  vicinity,  they 
will  disappear  utterly,  and  that  on  which  your  eye  is  fixed 
will  seem  alone  in  its  glory— sole  star  in  the  firmament. 
Something  of  this  kind  nappened  with  Mr.  Gammon  when 
on  the  walls  of  York— now  slowly  then  rapidly  walking, 
.low  standing,  then  sitting ;  all  the  objects  which  generally 
occupied  his  thoughts  faded  away,  before  one  on  which  his 
mind's  eye  was  then  fixed  with  unwavering  intensity — the 
visage  of  Miss  Aubrey.  The  golden  fruit  that  was  on  the 
eve  of  dropping  into  the  hands  of  the  firm — ten  thousand 
pounds— the  indefinite  and  varied  advantages  to  himself, 
personally,  to  which  their  recent  successes  might  be  turned, 
all  vanished.  What  would  he  not  undergo,  what  would  he 
not  sacrifice,  to  secure  the  favor  of  Miss  Aubrey?  Beautiful 
being — all  innocence,  elegance,  refinement ; — to  possess  her 
would  elevate  him  in  the  scale  of  being  ;  it  would  purify  his 
feelings,  it  would  ennoble  his  nature.  What  was  too 
arduous  or  desperate  to  be  undertaken  to  secure  a  prize  so 
glorious  as  this  ?  He  fell  into  a  long  reverie,  till,  roused  by 
a  chill  gust  of  night  air,  he  rose  from  his  seat  upon  one  of 
the  niches  in  the  walls  ;— how  lonely,  how  solitary  he  felt ! 
He  walked  on  rapidly,  at  a  pace  that  suited  the  heated  and 
rapid  current  of  thoughts  that  passed  through  his  mind. 

" No,  I  have  not  a  chance— not  a  chance!"  at  length  he 
thought  to  himself—"  That  girl  will  be  prouder  in  her 
poverty,  than  ever  she  would  liave  been  in  her  wealth  and 
splendor.  Who  am  I?— a  partner  in  the  firm  of  Quirk, 
Gammon,  and  Snap  ;  a  firm  m  bad  odor  with  the  profession  ; 
looking  for  practice  from  polluted  sources,  with  a  host  of 
miscreants  for  clients— faugh !  faugh  !  I  feel  contaminated 
and  degraded !  My  name  even  is  against  me  ;  it  is  growing 
into  a  by- word  !— We  must  push  our  advantage— they  must 
be  driven  from  Yatton— he,  she— all  of  them  ;  yes,  all.  He 
paused  for  a  long  time,  and  a  sort  of  pang  passed  through  his 
mind.  "  They  are  to  make  way  for— Titmouse !— for  Tit- 
mouse ! !  And  he,  too,  loves  her— bah  ! ''  He  involuntarily 
uttered  this  sound  fiercely,  and  aloud.  "  But  stay— he  really 
is  in  love  with  Miss  Aubrey— that  I  know  ;— ah !  I  can  turn 
it  to  good  pi 
the  little  fc 

means  he  may 

accessible  :  I  can  easily  bring  myself  into  contact  with  them, 
in  their  distress ;  for  there  are  the  mesne  profits— the  mesne 
profits  !  Heavens !  how  glorious,  but  how  dreadful  an  .en- 
gine are  they  !  They  will  help  to  batter  down  the  high  wall 


34$  TEN  THOUSAND  A-YEAE. 

of  pride  that  surrounds  them  and  her;  but  it  will  require  in- 
finite  care  and  tact  in  the  use  of  such  an  engine !  I  will  be 
all  delicacy— gentleness — generosity ;  I  will  appear  friendly 
to  her,  and  to  her  brother  ;  and,  if  needs  must  be,  why  he 
must  be  crushed.  There  is  no  help  for  it.  He  looks  decidedly 
by  the  way — a  man  of  intellect.  I  wonder  how  he  bears  it — 
how  they  all  bear  it — how  she  bears  it !  Beggared  beauty — 
(there's  something  touching  in  the  very  sound !  How  little 
'they  think  of  the  power  that  is  at  this  moment  in  my 
hands ! "  Here  a  long  interval  elapsed,  during  which  his 
thoughts  had  wandered  towards  more  practical  matters. 
"  If  they  don't  get  a  rule  nisi,  next  term,  we  shall  be  in  a 
position  to  ask  them  what  course  they  intend  to  pursue ;  Gad, 
they  may,  if  so  disposed,  hold  out  for— how  very  cold  it  is ! " 
— he  buttoned  his  coat—"  and,  what  have  I  been  thinking 
off  ?  Really  I  have  been  dreaming  ;  or  am  I  as  great  a  fool 
as  Tittlebat?"  Within  a  few  minutes'  time  he  had  quitted 
the  walls,  and  descended,  through  one  of  the  turreted  gate- 
ways, into  the  town. 


CHAPTER  XV. 

WHEN,  about  seven  o'clock  on  the  morning  after  the  de- 
livery of  the  verdict,  which,  if  sustained,  consigned  the  Au- 
brey s  to  beggary,  they  met  to  partake  of  a  slight  and  hearty 
breakfast  before  setting  off  for  Yatton ;  the  .countenances  of 
each  bore  the  traces  of  great  suffering,  and  also  of  the  efforts 
made  to  conceal  it.  They  saluted  each  other  with  fervent 
affection,  each  attempting  a  smile— but  a  smile,  how  wan  and 
forced !  "  The  moment  nas  arrived,  dear  Agnes  and  Kate," 
said  her  brother  with  a  fond  air  but  a  firm  voice,  as  his  sis- 
ter was  preparing  tea,  in  silence,  fearful  of  looking  at  either 
her  brother  or  sister-in-law ;  u  the  moment  has  arrived  that 
is  to  try  what  stuff  we  are  made  off.  If  we  have  any 
strength,  this  is  the  time  to  show  it ! " 

"  I'm  sure  I  thought  of  you  both  almost  all  night  long ! " 
replied  Miss  Aubrey  tremulously.  "  You  have  a  lion's  heart, 
dear  Charles ;  and  yet  you  are  so  gentle  with  us " 

"  I  should  be  a  poor  creature  indeed,  Kate,  to  give  way 
just  when  I  ought  to  play  the  man.  Come,  dear  Kate,  I  will 
remind  you  of  a  noble  passage  from  our  glorious  Shake- 
speare. It  braces  one's  nerves  to  hear  it !  "  Then,  with  a 
fine  impressive  delivery,  and  kindling  with  excitement  as 
he  went  on,  Aubrey  began — 

"  In  the  reproof  of  chance 

Lies  the  true  proof  of  men.     The  sea  being  smooth 
How  many  shallow  bauble  boats  dare  sail 


TEN  THOUSAND  A-TEAE.  (349 

Upon  her  patient  breast,  making  their  way 

With  those  of  nobler  bulk  ? 

But  let  the  ruffian  Boreas  once  enrage 

The  gentle  Thetis,  and,  anon,  behold 

The  strong-ribb'd  bark  through  liquid  mountains  cut,' 

Bounding  between  the  two  moist  elements 

Like  Perseus'  horse  ;  where' s  then  the  saucy  boat, 

Whose  weak  untimber'd  sides  but  even  now 

Co-rival' d  greatness  ?    Either  to  harbor  fled, 

Or  made  a  toast  for  Neptune  ! — Even  so, 

Doth  valor  show,  and  valor's  worth  divide, 

In  storms  of  fortune."  * 

'Twas  kindly  meant  of  Aubrey ;  he  thought  to  divert  the 
excited  feelings  of  his  wife  and  sister,  and  occupy  their 
imagination  with  the  vivid  imagery  and  noble  sentiment  of 
the  poet.  While  he  repeated  the  above  lines,  his  sister's  eye 
had  been  fixed  upon  him  with  a  radiant  expression  of  reso- 
lution, her  heart  responding  to  what  she  heard.  She  could 
not,  however,  speak  when  he  had  ceased.  For  herself  she 
cared  not;  but  when  she  looked  at  her  brother,  and  thought 
of  him,  his  wife,  his  children,  her  fortitude  yielded  before 
the  moving  array,  and  she  burst  into  tears. 

"  Come,  Kate  —  my  own  sweet,  good  Kate !  "  said  he 
cheerfully,  laying  his  hand  upon  hers,  "  we  must  keep  con- 
stant guard  against  our  feelings.  They  will  be  ever  array- 
ing before  our  eyes  the  past — the  dear,  delightful  past — 
happy  and  beautiful,  in  mournful  contrast  with  the  present, 
and  stirring  up,  every  moment,  a  thousand  secret  and  tender 
associations,  calculated  to  shake  our  constancy.  Whenever 
our  eyes  do  turn  to  the  past,  let  it  be  with  humble  grati- 
tude to  God  for  having  allowed  us  all,  in  this  changing 
world,  so  long  an  interval  of  happiness ;  such,  indeed,  as 
falls  to  the  lot  of  few.  What !  shall  we  receive  good  at  the 
hand  of  God,  and  shall  we  not  receive  evil  f  " 

"My  own  Charles!"  exclaimed  Mrs.  Aubrey,  rising  and 
throwing  her  arms  round  her  husband,  whose  countenance 
was  calm  and  serene,  as  was  the  tone  of  the  sentiments  he 
expressed  solemn  and  elevated.  Miss  Aubrey  was  overcome 
with  her  stronger  feelings,  and  buried  her  face  in  her  hand- 
kerchief. Shortly  afterwards  the  carriage  drew  up,  and  also 
Dr.  Tatham  on  horseback. 

"Good  morning!  good  morning,  my  friends,"  cried  he, 
cheerfully,  as  he  entered,  holding  forth  both  his  hands ;  "  you 
can't  think  how  fresh  and  pleasant  the  air  is  !  The  country 
for  me,  at  all  times  of  the  year !  I  hate  iowns !  Did  yoii 
sleep  well  ?  I  slept  like  a  top  all  night  long ;— no,  I  didn't 
either,  by  the  way.  Come,  come,  ladies !  On  with  your  bonnets 
and  shawls ! "  Thus  rattled  on  Avqrthy  little  Dr.  Tatham,  in  or- 
der to  prevent  anything  being  said  which  might  disturb  those 

*  Troilus  and  Cressida,  i.  3, 


350  TEN  THOUSAND  A-TEAE. 

whom  he  came  to  see,  or  cause  his  own  highly-charged  feelings 
to  give  way.  The  sight  of  Mrs.  and  Miss  Aubrey,  however, 
who  greeted  him  in  silence  as  they  hastily  drew  on  their  bon- 
nets and  shawls,  overcame  his  ill-assumed  cheerfulness  ;  and 
before  he  could  bustle  back,  as  he  presently  did,  to  the  street 
door,  his  eyes  were  obstructed  with  tears,  and  he  wrung  the 
hand  of  Mr.  Aubrey,  who  stood  beside  him,  with  convulsive 
energy.  They  soon  set  off,  and  at  a  rapid  pace,  Dr.  Tatham 
riding  along  beside  the  carriage.  Yatton  was  about  twelve 
miles  oft'.  For  the  first  few  miles  they  preserved  a  tolerable 
show  of  cheerfulness  ;  but  as  they  perceived  themselves  near- 
ing  Yatton,  it  became  plainly  more  and  more  of  an  effort  for 
any  of  them  to  speak.  Dr.  Tatham,  also,  talked  to  them  sel- 
domer  through  the  windows.  At  one  time  he  dropped  con- 
siderably behind ;  at  another,  he  rode  as  much  ahead. 

"Oh,  Charles,  don't  you  dread  to  see  Yatton  ?"  said  Miss 
Aubrey  suddenly,  as  they  turned  a  familiar  corner  of  the 
road.  Neither  of  them  replied  to  her. 

"  When  you  come  to  the  village,"  said  Mr.  Aubrey  present- 
ly, to  the  postilion,  "  drive  through  it,  right  up  to  the  Hall, 
as  quickly  as  you  can."  He  was  obeyed.  As  they  passed 
through  the  village,  with  their  windows  up,  none  of  them 
seemed  disposed  to  look  through,  but  leaned  back  in  silence, 
in  their  seats. 

"  God  bless  you !  God  bless  you !  I  shall  call  in  the  even- 
ing," exclaimed  Dr.  Tatham ;  as,  having  reached  the  vicar- 
age, he  hastily  waved  his  hand,  and  turned  off.  Soon  they 
had  passed  the  park  gates ;  when  had  they  entered  it  before 
with  such  heavy  hearts— with  eyes  so  dreading  to  encounter 
every  familiar  object  that  met  them  ?  Alas !  the  spacious 
park  was  no  longer  theirs ;  not  a  tree,  not  a  shrub,  not  a  flower, 
not  an  inch  of  ground;  the  trees  all  putting  forth  their  fresh 
green  leaves— nothing  was  theirs  ;  the  fine  old  turreted  gate- 
way, an  object  always,  hitherto,  of  peculiar  pride  and  attach- 
ment, their  hearts  seemed  to  tremble  as  they  rattled  under  it. 

"  Courage,  my  sweet  loves !  Courage !  courage !  "  exclaimed 
Mr.  Aubrey,  grasping  each  of  their  hands,  and  then  they 
burst  into  tears.  Mr.  Aubrey  felt  his  own  fortitude  grievous- 
ly shaken  as  he  entered  the  Old  Hall,  no  longer  his  home,  and 
reflected,  moreover— bitterest  thought  of  all— that  he  had 
been  declared  by  the  law  to  have  been  hitherto  the  wrongful 
occupant  of  it ;  that  he  must  forthwith  proceed  to  "set  his 
house  in  order,"  and  prepare  for  a  dreadful  reckoning  with 
him  whom  the  law  had  declared  to  be  the  true  owner  of 
Yatton. 

The  formal  result  of  the  trial  at  York  was,  as  has  been  al- 
ready intimated,  to  declare  Mr.  Titmouse  entitled  to  recover 
possession  of  only  that  insignificant  portion  of  the  estates 
held  by  Jacob  Jolter :  and  that,  too,  only  in  the  event  of  the 
first  four  days  of  the  ensuing  term  elapsing,  without  any  suc- 
cessful Attempt  being  made  to  impeach,  before  the  court,  the 


TEN  THOUSAND  A-YEAE.  351 

propriety  of  the  verdict  of  the  jury.  It  is  a  principle  of  our 
English  law,  that  the  verdict  ot  a  jury  is,  in  general,  irrever- 
sible and  conclusive  :  but,  inasmuch  as  that  verdict  may  have 
been  improperly  obtained— as,  for  instance,  either  through 
the  misdirection  of  the  judge,  or  his  erroneous  admission  or 
rejection  of  evidence ;  or  may  have  no  force  in  point  of  law 
by  reason  of  the  pleadings  of  the  party  for  whom  it  has  been 
gpven,  being  insufficient  to  warrant  the  court  to  award  its 
hnal  judgment  upon,  and  according  to,  such  verdict,  or  by 
reason  of  the  discovery  of  fresh  evidence  subsequently  to  the 
trial ;  therefore  the  law  hath  given  the  party  who  failed  at 
the  trial,  till  the  end  of  the  first  four  days  of  the  term  next 
ensuing,  to  show  the  court  why  the  verdict  obtained  by  his 
opponent  ought  to  go  for  nothing,  and  matters  remain  as  they 
were  before  the  trial,  or  a  new  trial  be  had.  So  anxious  is 
our  law  to  afford  the  utmost  scope  and  opportunity  for  ascer- 
taining what  ought  to  be  its  decision,  which,  when  obtained, 
is,  as  hath  been  said,  solemnly  and  permanently  conclusive 
upon  the  subject;  such  the  effectual  and  practical  corrective 
of  any  error  or  miscarriage  in  the  working  of  that  noble  en- 

fine— trial  by  jury.  Thus,  then,  it  appears,  that  the  hands  of 
Ir.  Titmouse  and  his  advisers  were  at  all  events  stayed  till 
the  first  four  days  of  Easter  term  should  have  elapsed.  Dur- 
ing the  considerable  interval  thus  afforded  to  the  advisers  9f 
Mr.  Aubrey,  his  case,  as  it  appeared  upon  the  notes  of  his 
counsel  on  their  briefs,  with  the  indirect  assistance  and  cor- 
roboration  derived  from  the  shorthand  writers'  notes,  under- 
went repeated  and  most  anxious  examination  in  all  its  parts 
and  bearings,  by  all  his  legal  advisers.  It  need  hardly  be  said, 
that  every  point  in  the  case  favorable  to  their  client  had  been 
distinctly  and  fully  raised  by  the  Attorney-General,  assisted 
by  his  very  able  juniors,  Mr.  Stirling  and  Mr.  Crystal ;  and 
so  was  it  with  the  counsel  of  Mr.  Titmouse,  as,  indeed,  the 
result  showed.  On  subsequent  examination,  none  of  them 
could  discover  any  false  step,  or  any  advantage  which  had 
been  overlooked,  or  taken  inefficiently.  Independently  of 
various  astute  objections  taken  by  the  Attorney-General  to 
the  reception  of  several  important  portions  of  the  plaintiff's 
evidence,  the  leading  points  relied  on  in  favor  of  Mr.  Aubrey 
were— the  impropriety  of  Lord  Widdrington's  rejection  of 
the  deed  of  confirmation  on  account  of  the  erasure  in  it ;  the 
effect  of  that  deed,  assuming  the  erasure  not  to  have  war- 
ranted its  rejection ;  and  several  questions  arising  out  of  the 
doctrine  of  adverse  possession,  by  which  alone,  it  had  been 
contended  at  the  trial,  that  the  claim  of  the  descendants  of 
Stephen  Dreddlington  had  been  peremptorily  and  finally 
barred.  Two  very  long  consultations  had  been  held  at  the 
Attorney-General  s  chambers,  attended  by  Mr.  Stirling,  Mr. 
Crystal,' Mr.  Mansfield,  the  three  partners  in  the  firm  of  Run- 
nington  and  Company,  Mr.  Parkinson,  and  Mr.  Aubrey— who 
had  come  up  to  town  for  the  purpose  alone.  Greatly  to  WQ 


352  TEN  THOUSAND  A-YEAR. 

surprise  of  all  of  them,  he  stated  most  distinctly  and  em- 
phatically, that  he  insisted  on  no  ground  of  objection  being 
taken  against  his  opponent,  except  such  as  was  strictly  just, 
equitable,  honorable  and  conscientious.  Rather  than  defeat 
him  on  mere  technicalities— rather  than  avail  himself  of  mere 
positive  rules  of  law,  while  the  RIGHT,  as  between  man  and 
man,  was  substantially  in  favor  of  his  opponent— Mr.  Aubrey 
declared,  however  absurd  or  Quixotic  he  might  be  thought, 
that  he  would— if  he  had  them— lose  fifty  Yattons.  Fiat 
justitia  ruat  ccelum.  "  You  mean  to  say,  Aubrey,"  interrupt- 
ed the  Attorney-General  mildly,  after  listening  tor  some  time 
to  his  friend  and  client  with  evident  interest,  and  admiration 
of  his  pure  and  high-minded  character—"  that  it  would  be 
unconscientious  of  you  to  avail  yourself  of  a  fixed  and  bene- 
ficial rule  of  lavv,  established  upon  considerations  of  general 
equity  and  utility — such,  for  instance,  as  that  of  adverse 
possession  in  order  to  retain  possession,  while— 

"  Pray,  Mr.  Attorney-General,  if  I  had  lent  you  five  hun- 
dred pounds  seven  or  eight  years  ago,  would  you  set  up  the 
statute  of  limitations  against  me  when  I  asked  for  repay- 
ment?" 

"  Excuse  me,  Aubrey,"  replied  the  Attorney-General,  with 
a  faint  flush  upon  his  handsome  and  dignified  features; 
"  but  how  idle  all  this  is !  One  would  imagine  that  we  were 
sitting  in  a  school  of  casuistry  !  What  are  we  met  for,  in 
the  name  of  common  sense  ?  For  what,  but  to  prevent  the 
rightful  owner  of  property  from  being  deprived  of  it  by  a 
trumpery  accidental  erasure  in  one  of  his  title-deeds,  which 
time  has  deprived  him  of  the  means  of  accounting  for  ?  "  He 
then,  in  a  very  kind  way,  but  with  a  dash  of  peremptoriness, 
requested  that  the  case  might  be  left  in  their  hands,  and  that 
they  might  be  given  credit  for  resorting  to  nothing  that  was 
inconsistent  with  the  nicest  and  most  fastidious  sense  of 
honor.  This  observation  put  an  end  to  so  unprecedented  an 
interference ;  but  if  Mr.  Aubrey  supposed  that  it  had  any  effect 
upon  the  Attorney-General,  he  was  mistaken ;  for  of  course 
tnat  learned  and  eminent  person  secretly  resolved  to  avail 
himself  of  every  conceivable  means,  great  and  small,  avail- 
able for  overturning  the  verdict,  and  securing  the  Aubreys 
in  the  possession  of  Yatton.  He  at  the  same  time  earnestly 
endeavored  to  moderate  the  expectations  of  his  client,  de- 
claring that  he  was  by  no  means  sanguine  as  to  the  issue ; 
that  Lord  Widdrington's  rulings  at  Jfisi  Prius  were  very 
formidable  things— in  fact,  rarely  assailable  ;  and  then,  again, 
the  senior  puisne  judge  of  the  court— Mr.  Justice  Grayley— 
had  been  consulted  by  Lord  Widdrington  at  the  trial,  and 
concurred  with  him  in  his  principal  ruling,  now  sought  to  be 
moved  against.  At  the  close  of  the  second  consultation,  on 
the  night  of  the  first  day  in  Easter  term,  (the  Attorney-Gen- 
eral intending  to  move  on  the  ensuing  morning,)  after  having 
finally  gone  over  the  case  in  all  its  bearings,  and  agreed  upon 


TEN  THOUSAND  A-YEAE.  353 

the  exact  grounds  of  moving— the  Attorney-General  called 
back  Mr.  Runnington  for  a  moment,  as  he  was  walking 
away  with  Mr.  Aubrey,  and  whispered  to  him,  that  it  would 
be  very  proper  to  assume  at  once  that  the  motion  failed ;  and 
consider  the  best  mode  of  negotiating  concerning  the  surren- 
der of  the  bulk  of  the  property,  and  the  payment  of  the 
mesne  profits. 

"  Oh !  Mr.  Aubrey  has  quite  made  up  his  mind  to  the 
worst,  Mr.  Attorney-General." 

"  Ah,  well ! "  replied  the  Attorney-General  with  a  sigh  ; 
and  about  five  minutes  after  Mr.  Running-ton's  departure, 
the  Attorney-General  stepped  into  his  carriage,  which  had 
been  standing  for  the  last  hour  opposite  his  chambers.  He 
drove  down  to  the  House  of  Commons,  where  he  almost 
immediately  after  delivered  a  long  and  luminous  speech  on 
one  of  the  most  important  and  intricate  questions  that  had 
been  discussed  during  the  session.  The  first  four  days  of 
term  are  an  awkward  interval  equally  to  incompetent  coun- 
sel and  incompetent  judges— when  such  there  are.  The  slips 
of  both  then  come  to  light ;  both  have  to  encounter  the  keen 
and  vigilant  scrutiny  of  a  learned,  acute,  and  independent 
body— the  English  bar.  If  a  judge  should  happen  to  be  in  any 
degree  unequal  to  the  exigencies  of  his  important  station- 
incompetent  for  the  due  discharge  of  his  difficult  functions 
at  Nisi  Prius— what  a  store  of  anxiety  and  mortifications 
accumulates  at  eyery  circuit  town  against  the  ensuing  term ; 
where  his  misrulings  are  distinctly  and  boldly  brought  under 
the  notice  of  the  full  court  and  the  assembled  bar !  What 
must  be  his  feelings  as  he  becomes  aware  that  all  interested  in 
the  matter  look  out  for  a  plentiful  crop  of  new  trials  from  the 
circuit  which  he  has  selected  to  favor  with  his  presence. 
Great  causes  lost,  verdicts  set  aside,  and  new  trials  ordered, 
at  an  enormous,  often  a  ruinous  expense,  entirely  on  account 
of  his  inability  to  seize  the  true  points  and  bearings  of  a  case, 
and  present  them  properly  to  a  jury,  to  apply  accurately  the 
principles  of  evidence !  Ilow  exquisitely  painful  to  suspect 
that  as  soon  as  the  name  is  announced,  the  anxious  attorneys 
withdraw  records  and  postpone  the  trials  of  their  chief 
causes,  in  all  directions  trying  no  more  than  they  can  possi- 
bly help,  in  the  hope  that  a  more  competent  judge  will  take 
the  circuit  after !  to  become,  every  now  and  then,  aware  that 
counsel  boldly  speculate  at  the  trial  upon  his  inexperience 
and  ignorance  by  impudent  experiments,  in  flagrant  violation 
of  elementary  principles !  And  then  for  incompetent  counsel ; 
is  not  his  a  similar  position  ?  Set  to  lead  a  cause,  before  a 
host  of  keen  rivals  watching  his  every  step  with  bitter  scru- 
tiny—feeling himself  entirely  at  sea;  bewildered  among 
details ;  forgetting  his  points  ;  losing  his  presence  of  mind  : 
with  no  fixed  principles  of  law  to  guide  him ;  laid  prostrate 
by  a  sudden  objection,  of  which,  when  too  late  and  the  mis- 
chief is  done  and  irretrievable,  he  sees,  or  has  explained  to 


854  TEN  THOUSAND  A-YEAR. 

him  the  fallacy,  and  absurdity,  and  even  audacity ;  discover- 
ing  from  indignant  juniors,  on  sitting  down,  he  has  gone  to 
the  jury  on  quite  the  wrong  tack,  and  in  effect  thrown  the 
cause  away ;  and  at  length  he  creeps  into  court  of  the  first 
four  days  of  term,  to  endeavor  to  retrieve  the  false  step  he 
took  at  the  trial ;  but  in  vain,  and  he  dare  not  look  his  at- 
torney in  the  face,  as  he  is  refused  his  rule !  These  and 
similar  thoughts  may  perhaps,  on  such  occasions,  be  passing 
through  the  mind  of  a  snarling  sarcastic  cynic,  disappointed 
in  his  search  for  business,  distanced  in  the  race  for  promo- 
tion, as  he  sees  the  bench  occupied  with  graceful  dignity 
by  men  of  acknowledged  fitness  chosen  from  among  the 
flower  of  the  bar  —  those  most  qualified  by  experience, 
learning,  intellect,  and  moral  character.  I  would  say  to 
an  inquirer,  go  now  into  any  one  of  the  superior  courts 
of  your  country— to  any  court  of  Nisi  Prius  in  the  king- 
dom ;  and  if  you  are  able  to  observe  and  appreciate  what 
you  shall  see?  you  will  acknowledge  that  in  no  single  instance 
has  the  precious  trust  of  administering  Justice  been  com- 
mitted to  unworthy  or  incompetent  hands,  whatever  may 
have  occasionally  been  the  case  in  a  former  day.  And  in  like 
manner  may  we  rebuke  our  cynic,  in  respect  of  his  disparag- 
ing estimate  of  the  leading  bar. 

The  spectacle  presented  by  the  court  in  bane,  to  a  thought- 
ful observer,  is  interesting  and  imposing.  Here,  for  instance, 
was  the  Court  of  King's  Bench,  presided  over  by  Lord  Wid- 
drington,  with  three  puisne  judges— all  men  of  powerful  un- 
derstandings, of  great  experience,  and  of  deep  and  extensive 
legal  knowledge.  Observe  the  dignified  calmness  and  pa- 
tience with  which  counsel  are  listened  to,  verbose  even  and 
tiresome  as  occasionally  they  are ;  the  judges  not  deranging 
their  thoughts,  or  the  order  in  which  the  argument  has  been, 
with  much  anxiety  and  care,  prepared  for  them  beforehand 
— by  incessant  suggestions  of  crude  and  hasty  impressions — 
but  suspending  their  judgment  till  fully  possessed  of  the  case 
brought  before  them  by  one  whom  his  client  has  thought  fit 
to  intrust  with  the  conduct  of  his  case.  They  never  interfere 
but  in  extreme  cases,  when  the  time  of  the  court  is  being 
plainly  wasted  by  loose  irrelevant  matter.  Their  demeanor 
is  characterized  by  grave  courtesy  and  forbearance  ;  and 
their  occasional  interference  is  received  by  the  bar  with  pro- 
found respect,  and  anxious  attention.  Never  is  to  be  seen  in 
any  of  our  courts  the  startling  spectacle  of  personal  collision 
between  judge  and  counsel — each  endeavoring  to  rival  the 
other  in  a  perverse  exhibition  of  acuteness  and  ingenuity. 
On  the  contrary  ?  a  thoughtful  observer  of  what  goes  on  in  any 
of  our  courts,  will  believe  that  our  judges  have  deeply  con- 
sidered the  truth  of  that  saying  01  Seneca — Nil  sapientice 
odiosius  ACUMINE  NIMIO  ;  and  modelled  themselves  after  the 
great  portraiture  of  the  judicial  office  drawn  by  the  most 
illustrious  of  philosophers. 


TEN  THOUSAND  A-YEAR.  355 

"Patience  and  gravity  of  bearing,  are  an  essential  part 
of  justice ;  and  an  over-speaking  judge  is  no  well-tuned  cym- 
bal. Judges  ought  to  be  more  learned  than  witty  ;  more  rev- 
erend than  plausible  ;  and  more  advised  than  confident.  It 
is  no  grace  to  a  judge  first  to  find  that  which  he  might  have 
heard  in  due  time  from  the  bar ;  or  to  show  quickness  of 
conceit,  in  cutting  off  evidence  or  counsel  too  short,  or  to  pre- 
vent information  by  questions,  though  pertinent-"  *  Our 
English  judges  are  indeed  worthy  of  the  affection  and  rever- 
ence with  which,  both  in  public  and  private,  they  are  re- 
garded ;  and  if  any  one  will  consider  their  severe  and  almost 
uninterrupted  labors — the  toil  and  weight  of  responsibility 
they  bear,  equalled  by  that  of  no  other  public  functionaries 
—he  will  doubly  appreciate  the  courtesy  and  forbearance 
which  are  exhibited  by  them,  and  forget  any  transient 
glimpses  of  asperity  or  impatience  on  the  part  of  men  ex- 
hausted, frequently,  by  both  bodily  and  mental  labor.  But  I 
forgot  that  I  had  brought  the  reader  into  the  Court  of  King's 
Bench,  where  he  has  been  standing  all  this  while,  watching 
Lord  Widdrington  "  go  through  the  bar,"  as  it  is  termed ; 
namely,  calling  on  all  the  counsel  present,  in  the  order  of  their 
seniority  or  position,  to  make  any  little  motion,  of  course, 
before  proceeding  with  the  principal  business  of  the  day. 
One  learned  gentleman  moved,  for  instance,  to  discharge  a 
fraudulent  debtor  out  of  custody,  so  that  he  might  start  off 
for  the  continent  and  avoid  a  debt  of  £3000,  because,  in  the 
copy  of  the  writ,  the  word  was,  "  sheriff,  and  in  the  writ  it- 
self, "  sheriffs  ; "  and  in  this  motion  he  succeeded,  greatly  to 
the  astonishment  of  Mr.  Aubrey.  But  the  court  said,  that  a 
"  copy"  meant  a  copy;  and  this  was  not  a  copy  :  where  was 
the  line  to  be  drawn  ?  Were  they  to  have  a  contest  on  every 
occasion  of  a  party's  carelessness  as  to  the  materiality,  or  im- 
materiality, of  the  variance  it  had  occasioned  ?  So  the  rule 
was  made  absolute,  with  costs.  Another  scamp  sought  to  be 
discharged  out  of  custody— or  rather  that  his  bail-bond 
should  be  delivered  up  to  be  cancelled,  because  his  name 
therein  was  called  "Smyth,"  whereas  in  the  writ  it  was 
"  Smythe  ; "  but  after  his  counsel  had  cited  half-a-dozen  cases, 
the  court  thought  that  the  maxim  of  idem  sonans  applied, 
and  discharged  the  rule.  Then  half-a-dozen  young  gentle- 
men moved  for  "judgment  as  in  case  of  a  nonsuit  " — some  of 
them  with  real,  most  of  them  with  affected  self-possession 
and  nonchalance  ;  another  moved  for  an  attachment  against 
a  party  for  non-payment  of  costs,  pursuant  to  the  Master's 
allocatur ;  and  the  last,  in  the  very  back  row  of  all,  in  a 
husky  voice,  and  with  a  palpitating  heart,  rose  to  move  for 
a  "  rule  to  compute  principal  and  interest  on  a  bill  of  ex- 
change" Then  all  the  bar  had  been  gone  through,  in  about 
half-an-hour's  time ;  during  which  the  Attorney-General  had 

*  Lord  BACON.    Essays — "  Of  Judicature," 


856  TEN  THOUSAND  A-YEAE. 

come  into  court,  and  arranged  all  his  books  and  papers  be- 
fore him ;  Mr.  Subtle  sitting  next  to  him  with  a  slip  of  paper 
before  him  to  take  a  note  of  the  grounds  on  which  he  moved. 

"  Does  any  other  gentleman  move  ?  "  inquired  Lord  Wid- 
drington,  looking  over  the  court.  He  received  no  answer. 

"  Mr.  Attorney-General,"  said  he ;  and  the  Attorney- 
General  rose— 

"If  your  lordship  pleases,"  commenced  the  Attorney- 
General,  slowly  rising,  and  bowing — "  in  a  case  of  DOE  on  the 
Demise  of  TITMOUSE  against  JOLTER,  tried  before  your  Lord- 
ship at  the  last  assizes  for  the  county  of  York,  I  have  hum- 
bly to  move  your  lordship  for  a  rule  to  show  cause  why  a 
nonsuit^  should  not  be  entered,  or  why  the  verdict  entered  for 
the  plaintiff  should  not  be  set  aside,  and  a  New  Trial  had." 
He  proceeded  to  state  the  facts  of  the  case,  and  what  had 
taken  place  at  the  trial,  with  great  clearness  and  brevity.  In 
like  manner— with  perfect  simplicity  and  precision  —  he 
stated  the  various  points  arising  upon  the  evidence,  and  the 
general  grounds  of  law  which  have  been  already  specified ; 
but  I  am  so  grateful  to  the  reader  for  his  patience  under  the 
infliction  of  so  much  legal  detail  as  was  contained  in  the  last 
chapter  of  this  history,  that  I  shall  now  content  myself  with 
the  above  general  statement  of  what  took  place  before  the 
court.  As  soon  as  he  had  sat  down,  the  court  consulted  to- 
gether for  a  minute  or  two ;  and  then — 

"  You  may  take  a  rule  to  show  cause,  Mr.  Attorney-Gen- 
eral/' said  Lord  Widdrington. 

"  On  all  the  grounds  I  nave  mentioned,  my  lord? " 

"  Yes — Mr.  Solicitor-General,  do  you  move  ?  " 

Up  rose,  thereat,  the  Solicitor-General. 

"  I  shall  discharge  your  rule,"  whispered  Mr.  Subtle  to  the 
Attorney-General. 

"I'm  afraid  you  will,"  whispered  the  Attorney-General, 
leaning  his  head  close  to  Mr.  Subtle,  and  with  his  hand  be- 
fore his  mouth.  Then  his  clerk  removed  the  battery  of  books 
which  stood  before  him,  together  with  his  brief ;  and  taking 
another  out  of  his  turgid  red  bag,  the  Attorney-General  was 
f  soon  deep  in  the  details  of  an  important  shipping  case,  in 
which  he  was  going  to  move  when  next  it  came  to  his  turn. 

Thus  the  court  had  granted  a  "RULE  NISI,"  as  it  is  called, 
(«'.  e.  it  commanded  a  particular  thing  to  be  done—"  unless 
sufficient  "  cause "  could  be  thereafter  shown  to  the  court 
why  it  should  not  be  done,)  for  either  entering  a  nonsuit,  or 
having  a  new  trial.  Now,  had  this  rule  been  obtained  in  the 
present  day,  at  least  two  years  must  have  elapsed,  owing  to 
the  immense  and  perhaps  unavoidable  arrear  of  business,  be- 
fore the  other  side  could  have  been  heard  in  answer  to  it ;  so, 
at  least,  it  has  been  reported  to  me,  in  this  green  old  solitude 
where  I  am  writing,  pleasantly  recalling  long-past  scenes  of 
the  bustling  professional  life  from  which  I  am  thankful  for 
having  been  able,  with  a  moderate  competence,  years  ago  to 


TEN  THOUSAND  A-YEAB.  357 

retire.  Now,  had  such  been  the  state  of  business  at  the  time 
when  the  Rule  in  Doe  d.  Titmouse  v.  Jolter  was  moved  for, 
see  the  practical  effect  of  it ;  had  Mr.  Aubrey,  instead  of  the 
high-minded  and  conscientious  man  he  undoubtedly  was,  been 
a  rogue,  he  might  have  had  the  opportunity  of  getting  in 
twenty  thousand  pounds,  and  setting  off  with  it  to  spend 
upon  the  Continent,  as  soon  as  he  found  that  the  court  had 
decided  against  him:  or,  if  the  tenants  should  have  been 
served  with  notice  not  to  pay  their  rents  to  any  one  but  Mr. 
Titmouse — at  all  events  not  to  Mr.  Aubrey — how  was  Mr. 
Aubrey  and  his  family  to  have  subsisted  during  this  inter- 
val ? — and  with  the  possibility  that,  at  the  end  of  the  two 
years,  Mr.  Aubrey  might  be  declared  to  be  the  true  owner 
of  Yatton,  and  consequently  all  the  while  entitled  to  those 
rents,  etc.,  the  non-payment  of  which  might  have  entailed 
upon  him  the  most  serious  embarrassments.  During  the 
same  interval,  poor  Mr.  Titmouse,  heart-sick  with  hope  de- 
ferred, might  have  taken  to  liquor,  as  a  solace  under  his 
misery,  and  drunk  himself  to  death  before  the  rule  was 
discharged — or  brought  his  valuable  life  to  a  more  sudden 
and  abrupt  conclusion  :  which  affecting  event  would  have 
relieved  the  court  from  deciding  several  troublesome  points 
of  law,  and  kept  the  Aubreys  in  possession  of  the  ^  atton 
estates.  If  what  I  am  informed  of  as  to  the  accumulation  of 
arrears  in  the  Court  of  King's  Bench  in  the  present  day,  in 
spite  of  the  anxious  and  unprecedented  exertions  of  its  very 
able  and  active  judges,  be  correct,  I  suspect  that  I  shall  not  be 
believed,  when  I  inform  the  reader  that  within  ten  or  twelve 
days  after  the  rule  nisi  in  the  present  case,  had  been  moved, 
"  cause  was  shown  "  against  it  by  Mr.  Subtle  and  Mr.  Lynx, 
and  very  admirably  shown  against  it  too.  (Mr.  Quicksilver, 
unfortunately  for  the  interests  of  Mr.  Titmouse,  was  absent, 
attending  a  great  meeting  in  the  City,  called  by  himself,  to 
establish  a  society  for  the  Moral  and  Intellectual  Regener- 
ation of  Mankind  on  the  Basis  of  Pure  Reason.)  The  At- 
torney-General exerted  himself  to  the  utmost  in  support  of  his 
rule.  He  felt  that  the  court— though  scarcely  at  all  interfer- 
ing during  his  address — was  against  him  ;  yet  he  delivered, 
perhaps,  one  of  the  most  masterly  arguments  that  had  ever 
been  heard  in  the  place  where  he  was  speaking.  Mr.  Ster- 
ling and  Mr.  Crystal,  wisely  avoiding  the  ground  so  admir- 
ably occupied  by  the  Attorney-General,  contented  themselves 
with  strengthening  those  positions  which  appeared  to  them 
less  fortified  by  positive  authority  than  the  others ;  and  then 
the  court  said  they  would  take  a  day  or  two's  time  to  con- 
sider :  "  less  on  account,"  said  Lord  Widdrington,  "  of  the 
difficulty  of  the  case,  than  the  magnitude  of  the  interests 
which  would  probably  be  affected  by  their  decision." 

"You  have  them  dead  with  you,  Subtle,"  whispered  the 
Attorney-General,  a  slight  expression  of  chagrin  stealing 


S58  TEN  THOUSAND  A-TEAR. 

over  his  features,  as  he  heard  the  observation  of  Lord  Wid- 
drington. 

"  1  never  doubted  it,"  replied  Mr.  Subtle  with  a  confident 
air.  Every  day  afterwards,  from  the  sitting  to  the  rising  of 
the  court,  did  the  anxious  Aubrey  attend  in  the  King's 
Bench,  to  hear  the  judgment  of  the  court  delivered.  At 
length  arrived  the  last  day  of  the  term.  Soon  after  the  sit- 
ting of  the  court,  Lord  Widdrington  pronounced  judgment 
in  two  or  three  cases ;  but  not  seeing  the  Attorney-General 
(who  was  engaged  before  the  House  of  Lords)  in  his  place, 
delayed  giving  judgment  in  the  case  of  Doe  and  Jolter' 
About  two  o'clock  he  made  his  appearance;  and  shortly 
afterwards,  Lord  Widdrington,  after  disposing  of  the  matter 
then  before  the  court,  said — "  There  was  a  case  of  Doe  oil 
the  demise  of  Titmouse  against  Jolter,  in  which,  early  in 
the  term,  a  rule  was  obtained,  calling  upon  the  lessor  of  the 
plaintiff  to  show  cause  why  "—and  he  proceeded  to  state  the 
rule,  and  then  to  deliver  the  written  unanimous  iudgment  of 
the  court.  A  clear  and  elaborate  statement  of  the  facts,  out 
of  which  the  questions  submitted  to  the  court  had  arisen,  and 
of  those  questions  themselves,  was  listened  to  by  Mr.  Au- 
brey in  breathless  suspense,  before  he  could  obtain  the 
faintest  intimation  of  the  judgment  which  the  court  was 
about  to  pronounce.  Lord  Widdrington  went  on  to  dispose, 
one  by  one,  with  painful  deliberation  and  precision,  01  the 
seven  points  presented  for  the  decision  of  the  court.  One  or 
two  questions  they  decided  in  favor  of  the  defendant ;  but 
added  that  it  had  become  unnecessary  to  do  so,  in  conse- 
quence of  the  answers  given  by  the  witnesses  to  other  ques- 
tions, at  the  trial,  and  which  disposed  of  the  doubts  arising 
on  the  former  questions.  The  documentary  evidence, 
subsequently  put  in,  got  rid  of  another  difficulty  in  the  early 
part  of  the  plaintiff's  case,  and  rendered  immaterial  a  ques- 
tion put  by  the  plaintiff's  counsel,  and  strenuously  objected 
to  on  the  part  of  the  defendant ;  which  question  the  court 
was  of  opinion,  as  had  been  Lord  Widdrington  at  the  trial, 
ought  not  to  have  been  allowed.  Then,  as  to  the  question  of 
ADVERSE  POSSESSION,  on  which  very  great  stress  had  been  laid 
by  the  defendant's  counsel,  the  court  was  of  opinion  that  none 
existed;  since  there  had  been  a  disability— indeed  a  series  of 
disabilities  *— through  infancy,  coverture,  and  absence  beyond 
seas,  of  the  various  parties  through  whom  the  lessor  of  the 
plaintiff  claimed.  Finally,  as  to  the  question  concerning  the 
ERASURE,  the  court  was  clearly  of  opinion,  that  the  deed  in 
which  it  occurred  had  been  properly  rejected  ;  inasmuch  as 
the  erasure  occurred  in  a  clearly  material  part  of  the  deed, 
and  there  were  no  recitals  in  the  deed  by  which  it  could  be 
helped.  That  it  was  clearly  incumbent  upon  those  proffering 

*  If  the  reader  will  refer  to  p.  319  he  may  see  how  the  disabilities  here 
alluded  to  arose,  and  affected  the  case. 


TEN  THOUSAND  A-YEAE.  359 

the  deed  in  evidence,  to  account  for  its  altered  appearance, 
altLough  the  deed  was  more  than  thirty  years  old,  and  rebut 
the  presumption  of  fraud  arising  therefrom.  That  the 
erasure  was  a  clear  badge  of  fraud  !  and  to  hold  otherwise 
would  be  to  open  a  wide  door  to  frauds  of  the  most  extensive 
and  serious  description.  That  there  had  been  no  evidence 
offered  to  show  that  the  deed  had  ever  been  a  valid  deed  ;  the 
very  first  step  failed ;  and,  in  short,  in  its  then  state,  it  was  in 
contemplation  of  law  no  deed  at  all;  and,  consequently,  had 
been  properly  rejected.  "  For  all  these  reasons,  therefore, 
we  are  clearly  of  opinion  that  the  verdict  ought  not  to  be 
disturbed,  and  the  rule  will  consequently  be  DISCHARGED." 
As  these  last  words  were  pronounced,  a  mist  seemed  for  a 
moment  to  intervene  between  Mr.  Aubrey  and  the  objects 
around  him  ;  for  his  thoughts  had  reverted  to  Yatton,  and 
the  precious  objects  of  his  affection  who  were  there,  in  sick- 
ening suspense,  awaiting  the  event  which  had  that  moment 
taken  place.  The  words  yet  sounding  in  his  excited  ears, 
seemed  like  the  sentence  of  expulsion  from  Paradise  passed 
upon  our  dismayed  and  heart-broken  first  parents.  Yes,  in 
that  solemn  region  of  matter-of-fact  and  common-place— that 
dead  sea,  as  far  as  feeling,  sentiment,  incident,  or  excitement 
is  concerned,  the  Court  of  King's  Bench— there  sat  a  man  of 
exquisite  sensibility — pure  and  high-minded— whose  feelings 
were  lor  a  while  paralyzed  by  the  words  which  had  fallen 
from  the  judgment-seat,  uttered  with  a  cold,  business-like, 
indifferent  air— oh!  how  horridly  out  of  concert  with  the 
anxious  and  excited  tone  of  him  whom,  with  his  lovely  family, 
they  consigned,  in  fact,  to  destitution !  After  remaining  for 
about  a  quarter  of  an  hour,  during  which  brief  interval  he 
resumed  the  control  over  his  feelings  which  he  had  so  long 
and  successfully  struggled  to  maintain,  he  rose,  and  quitted 
the  court.  It  was  a  heavy,  lowering  afternoon— one  which 
seemed  to  harmonize  with  the  gloomy  and  desolate  mood  in 
which  he  slowly  walked  homeward.  He  encountered  many 
of  his  friends,  on  foot,  on  horseback,  and  in  carriages,  on  their 
way  down  to  the  Houses  of  Parliament ;  the  very  sight  of 
them,  in  the  morbid  state  of  his  feelings,  gave  him  a  pang 
that  was  indescribable.  With  them  matters  were  the  same 
as  they  had  ever  been — as  they  had  till  then  been  with  him 
— and  as  probably  they  would  be  with  them  to  the  end  of 
their  career ;  but  he  had  been  forced,  suddenly  and  forever, 
to  quit  the  scene  of  high  excitement— he  heaved  many  heavy 
sighs,  as  he  exchanged  nod  after  nod  with  those  lie  met,  as 
he  approached  Charing  Cross.  There  lie  encountered  Lord 

C ,  the  brilliant  Foreign  Secretary,  arm  in  arm  with  two 

eloquent  and  leading  members  of  the  Government— all  of 
them  evidently  in  high  spirits,  on  their  way  down  to  the 
House. 

"Ah!— Aubrey! — In  town!— An  age  since  we  met!"  ex- 
claimed they,  in  a  breath,  shaking  him  cordially  by  the  hand. 


360  TEN  THOUSAND  A-TEAE. 

— "  You  know,  of  course,  that  the  budget  comes  on  to-night— • 
eh? " 

"  I  assure  you,"  said  Lord  C ,  "  our  friends  will  do  us 

great  service — very  essential  service,  by  being  early  in  their 
attendance ! — You  know  that  Mr.  Quicksilver  intends  to  come 
out  against  us  to-night  in  great  force  ?— My  dear  Aubrey,  you 
are  going  the  wrong  way. 

"  I  am  not  going  down  to  the  House  to-night." 

"  Not  going  down?— Eh?— My  dear  Aubrey,  you  astonish 
me  !— Have  you  paired  off !  You  can't  think  how  I  lament 
your  absence ! " 

"  I  am  returning  to  Yorkshire  almost  immediately." 

"  But  surely  you  can  come  for  an  hour,  or  so,  to-night — eh  ? 
Come?  Don't  let  a  trifle  stand  in  the  way." 

"  I  would  not  let  a  trifle  stand  in  the  way,"  replied  Mr. 
Aubrey  in  a  tone  and  manner  that  at  once  arrested  the  at- 
tention of  them  whom  he  was  addressing,  and  suddenly 
reminded  them  of  what,  in  their  political  eagerness,  they  had 
for  a  moment  lost  sight  of — namely,  the  perilous  position  of 
his  private  affairs. 

"  My  dear  Aubrey,  I  beg  a  thousand  pardons  for  intruding 
such  matters  upon  you,"  said  Lord  C ,  with  sudden  ear- 
nestness; "but  shall  we  have  an  opportunity  of  meeting 
before  you  leave  town  ?  " 

"  I  fear— not;— I  set  off  by  the  mail  to-morrow  evening — 
and  have  in  the  meantime  much  to  attend  to,"  said  Mr.  Au- 
brey, unable  to  repress  a  sigh— and  they  parted.  But  for  a 
determination  not  to  yield  to  a  morbid  sensibility,  he  would 
have  got  into  a  hackney-coach,  and  so  have  avoided  the 
''troops  of  friends,"  the  hosts  of  "old  familiar  faces,"  all 
wending  down  to  the  scene  in  which  he  had  begun  so 
eminently  to  distinguish  himself — but  from  which  he  seemed 
now  to  be  forever  excluded.  He,  therefore,  pursued  his 
way  on  foot.  One  of  those  on  whom  his  troubled  eye  lit,  was 

a  well-known  figure  on  horseback— the  great  Duke  of ,  on 

his  way  down  to  the  House  of  Lords,  going  very  slowly,  his 
head  inclined  on  one  side,  his  iron-cast  features  overspread 
with  an  expression  of  stern  though tfulness.  He  did  not 
observe  Mr.  Aubrey— in  fact,  he  seemed  too  much  absorbed 
with  his  own  thoughts  to  observe  or  recognize  anybody ;  yet 
he  now  and  then  mechanically  raised  his  finger  to  his  hat, 
in  acknowledgment  of  the  obeisances  of  those  whom  he 
met.  Poor  Aubrey  sighed ;  and  felt  as  if  circumstances  had 
placed  him  at  an  immeasurable  distance  from  him  whom,  so 
lately,  he  had  entertained  familiarly  at  dinner ;  that  there 
seemed  suddenly  to  have  arisen,  as  it  were,  a  great  and  im- 
passable gulf  between  them- 

On  reaching  his  house  in  Grosvenor  Street,  his  heart  flut- 
tered while  he  knocked  and  rang ;  and  he  seemed  to  shrink 
from  the  accustomed  obsequious  voice  and  manner  of  the 
powdered  menial  who  admitted  him.  Having  ordered  a 


TEN  THOUSAND  A-TEAR.  361 

slight  dinner,  he  repaired  to  his  library.  The  only  letter 
which  had  arrived  since  he  had  left  in  the  morning,  bore  the 
Grilston  post-mark,  and  was  in  the  handwriting  of  Mrs.  Au- 
brey. He  opened  it  with  trembling  eagerness.  It  was  crossed 
—the  dear  familiar  handwriting !— from  beginning  to  end, 
and  full  of  heart-subduing  tenderness.  Then  it  had  a  little 
enclosure,  with  a  strange,  straggling  superscription,  "To 
my  Papa ;  "  and  on  opening  it  he  read,  in  similar  characters— 

tk  My  dear  Papa,  I  love  you  very  very  much.  Do  come 
home.  Mamma  sends  her  love.  Your  dutiful  son, 

"  CHARLES  AUBREY. 

"  P.S.  Agnes  sends  her  love ;  she  cannot  write  because  she 
is  so  little.  Please  to  come  home  directly, 

"  CHARLES  A.,  Yatton." 

Aubrey  saw  how  it  was — that  Mrs.  Aubrey  had  either  af- 
fected to  write  in  her  little  son's  name,  or  had  actually  guid- 
ed his  pen.  On  the  outside  she  had  written  in  pencil— 

"  Charles  says,  he  hopes  that  you  will  answer  his  letter  di- 
rectly." 

Aubrey's  lip  quivered,  and  his  eyes  filled  with  tears.  Put- 
ting the  letters  into  his  bosom,  he  rose  and  walked  to  and 
fro,  with  feelings  which  cannot  be  described.  The  evening 
was  very  gloomy  it  poured  with  rain  incessantly.  He  was 
the  only  person  in  that  spacious  and  elegant  house,  except 
the  servants  left  in  charge  of  it ;  and  dreary  and  desolate 
enough  it  felt.  He  was  but  its  nominal  owner — their  nomi- 
nal master !  In  order  to  save  the  post,  he  sat  down  to  write 
home — (home  !  his  heart  sank  within  him  at  the  thought) — 
and  informed  Mrs.  Aubrey  and  his  sister  of  the  event  for  which 
his  previous  letters  had  prepared  them ;  adding  that  he 
should  set  off  for  Yatton  by  the  mail  of  the  ensuing  night, 
and  that  he  was  perfectly  well.  He  also  wrote  a  line  or  two, 
in  large  printed  characters,  by  way  of  answer  to  his  little  cor- 
respondent, his  son,  towards  whom  how  his  heart  yearned ! 
and  having  dispatched  his  packet,  probably  the  last  he  should 
ever  frank,  he  partook  of  a  hasty  and  slight  dinner,  and  then 
resigned  himself  to  deep  meditation  upon  his  critical  circum- 
stances. He  was  perfectly  aware  of  his  precise  position,  in 
point  of  law,  namely,  that  he  was  safe  in  the  possession  of 
the  Yatton  property,  (with  the  exception  of  the  trifle  which 
was  occupied  by  Jolter,  and  had  been  the  object  of  the  action 
just  determined,)  till  another  action  should  have  been  brought, 
directly  seeking  its  recovery  ;  and  that  by  forcing  bis-oppo- 
nent to  bring  such  action,  he  might  put  him  to  considerable 
risk  of  retaining  his  verdict,  and  thereby  greatly  harass  him, 
and  ward  oft',  indefinitely,  the  evil  day  from  himself.  By 
these  means  he  might  secure  them,  possibly,  also,  favorable 
terms  for  the  payment  of  the  dreadful  arrear  of  mesne  prof- 
its, in  which  he  stood  indebted  to  his  successor.  To  this 
effect  he  had  received  several  intimations  from  as  upright 
and  conscientious  an  adviser,  Mr.  Runnington,  as  was  to  be 


S62  TEN  THOUSAND  A-YEAR. 

found  in  the  profession.  But  Mr.  Aubrey  had  decided  upon 
his  course ;  he  had  taken  his  ground,  and  intended  to  main- 
tain it.  However  sudden  and  unlooked-for  had  been  the 
claim  set  up  against  him,  it  had  been  deliberately  and  solemn- 
ly confirmed  by  the  law  of  the  land ;  and  he  had  no  idea  but 
of  yielding  it  a  prompt  and  hearty  obedience.  He  resolved, 
therefore,  to  waste  no  time— to  fritter  away  no  energy  in  fee- 
ble dalliance  with  trouble ;  but  to  face  her  boldly,  and  com- 
ply with  all  her  exactions.  He  would,  on  the  morrow,  in- 
struct Mr.  Runnington  to  write  to  his  opponent's  solicitors, 
informing  them  that  within  three  weeks  time  the  estates  at 
Yatton  would  be  delivered  up  to  their  client,  Mr.  Titmouse. 
He  would  also  direct  his  own  private  solicitor  to  arrange  for 
the  quickest  possible  disposal  of  his  house  in  Grosvenor 
Street,  and  his  wines  and  his  furniture,  both  there  and  at 
Yatton.  He  resolved,  moreover,  on  the  morrow,  to  take  the 
necessary  steps  for  vacating  his  seat  in  Parliament,  by  ap- 
plying for  the  Stewardship  of  the  Chiltern  Hundreds ;  and 
having  determined  on  these  arrangements,  consequent  upon 
the  adverse  decision  of  the  Court  of  King's  Bench  of  that 
day,  he  felt  the  momentary  relief  and  satisfaction  of  the  sea- 
man who  has  prepared  his  vessel  for  the  approaching  storm. 

He  felt,  indeed,  relieved  for  a  while  from  a  dreadful  pres- 
sure. 

"  And  what,  now,  have  I  really  to  complain  of?  "  said  he  to 
himself ;  "  why  murmur  presumptuously  and  vainly  against 
the  dispensations  of  Providence?  I  thank  God  that  I  arn 
still  able  to  recognize  his  hand  in  what  has  befallen  me,  and 
to  believe  that  he  hath  done  all  things  well ;  that  prosperity 
and  adversity  are  equally,  from  him,  means  of  accomplishing 
his  all-wise  purposes !  Is  it  for  me,  poor  insect !  to  question  the 
goodness,  the  wisdom,  or  the  justice  of  my  Maker  ?  I  thank 
God  for  the  firm  belief  I  have  that  he  governs  the  world  in 
righteousness,  and  that  he  has  declared  that  he  will  protect 
and  bless  them  who  sincerely  endeavor  to  discover,  and  con- 
form to,  his  will  concerning  them.  He  it  was  that  placed  me 
in  my  late  condition  of  prosperity  and  eminence  :  why  should 
I  fret,  when  he  sees  fit  gently  to  remove  me  from  it,  and 
place  me  in  a  different  sphere  of  exertion  and  suffering?  If 
the  dark  heathen  could  spend  a  life  in  endeavoring  to  steel 
his  heart  against  the  sense  of  suffering,  and  to  look  with 
cheerless  indifference  upon  the  vicissitudes  of  life,  shall  I,  a 
Christian,  shrink  with  impatience  and  terror  from  the  first 
glimpse  of  adversity  ?  Even  at  the  worst,  how  favored  is  my 
situation  in  comparison  of  that  of  millions  of  my  fellow-crea- 
tures ?  Shall  I  not  lessen  my  own  sufferings,  by  the  contem- 
plation of  those  which  the  Almighty  has  thought  fit  to  in- 
flict upon  my  brethren  ?  What  if  I,  and  those  whom  I  love, 
were  the  subjects  of  direful  disease — of  vice— of  dishonor  ? 
What  if  I  were  the  object  of  a  just  and  universal  contempt, 
given  up  to  a  reprobate  mind ;  miserable  here,  and  without 


TEN  THOUSAND  A-TEAE.  363 

hope  hereafter  ?  Here  have  I  health,  a  loving  family— have 
had  the  inestimable  advantages  of  education,  and  even  now, 
in  the  imminent  approach  of  danger,  am  enabled  to  preserve, 
in  some  measure,  a  composure  of  feeling,  a  resolution  which 
will  support  me,  and  those  who  are  dearer  to  me  than  life." 
Here  his  heart  beat  quickly,  and  he  walked  rapidly  to  and 
fro.  "  I  am  confident  that  Providence  will  care  for  them  ! 
As  for  me,  even  in  sight  of  the  more  serious  and  startling 
peril  that  menaces  me — what  is  it  to  a  Christian,  but  a  trial 
of  his  constancy  ?  There  hath  no  temptation  taken  you,  say 
the  Scriptures  written  for  our  instruction,  but  such  as  is 
common  to  man  ;  *  but  God  is  faithful,  who  will  not  suffer 
to  be  tempted  above  what  ye  are  able,  but  will  with  the  temp- 
tation, also  make  a  way  to  escape  that  ye  may  be  able  to  bear 
it,"  This  consolatory  passage,  led  Aubrey  in  a  calm  and  ex- 
alted mood  of  mind,  to  meditate  upon  that  picture  of  submis- 
sion to  manifold  misfortune,  simple  and  sublime  beyond  all 
comparison  or  approach,  drawn  by  the  pencil  of  one  inspired 
with  wisdom  from  on  high — calculated  at  once  to  solemnize,  to 
strengthen,  and  elevate  the  heart  and  character  of  man ;  and 
which  is  to  be  found  in  the  first  and  second  chapters  of  the 
Book  of  Job.  Oh,  reader!  AV!IO,  brilliant  as  maybe  at  this 
moment  thy  position  in  life,  may  have  been  heretofore,  or 
may  be  hereafter,  placed  in  circumstances  of  dreadful  suffer- 
ing and  peril,  suffer  him  whose  humble  labors  now  for  a  mo- 
ment occupy  thy  attention,  reverently  to  refer  thee,  again 
and  yet  again,  to  that  memorable  passage  of  holy  writ !  With 
danger  surrounding  him,  with  utter  ruin  staring  him  in  the 
face,  Mr.  Aubrey  read  this  glorious  passage  ;  his  shaken 
spirit  gathered  from  it  calmness  and  consolation,  and,  retir- 
ing early  to  bed,  he  enjoyed  a  night  of  tranquil  undisturbed 
repose. 

''They  are  determined  not  to  let  the  grass  grow  under- 
neath their  feet,  Mr.  Aubrey,"  said  Mr.  Runnmgton,  who, 
the  next  morning,  made  his  appearance  at  breakfast,  pur- 
suant to  appointment ;  "  within  two  hours'  time  of  the  court 
delivering  judgment,  yesterday  afternoon,  I  received  the 
following  communication."  He  handed  to  Mr.  Aubrey  this 
letter  :— 

"  Saffron  Hill.  25th  April,  18— 
"  GENTLEMEN, 

"  Doe  d.  Titmouse  v.  Jolter. 

•'  The  rule  for  a  new  trial  herein  having  been  this  day  dis- 
charged, and  the  unanimous  judgment  of  the  court  de- 

*"(  AvOpumvos  ")  signifies  in  this  place,  (1st  Corinth,  x.  13.)  says 
a  great  commentator  on  this  memorable  passage  of  Scripture,  "  snch  as 
is'suited  to  the  nature  and  circumstances  of  man;  such  as  every  man 
may  reasonably  expect  if  he  considers  the  nature  of  his  body  and  soul, 
and  his  situation  in  tne  present  world." 


564  TEN  THOUSAND  A-YEAE. 

livered  in  favor  of  the  claims  to  the  Yatton  estate  of  the  les- 
sor of  the  plaintiff  in  the  present  action,  we  shall  feel  obliged 
by  an  intimation  from  you,  at  your  earliest  possible  con- 
venience, of  the  course  which  your  client  may  now  think  fit 
to  adopt.  You  are,  of  course,  aware  that  we  are  now  in  a 
situation  to  attack,  successfully,  the  entire  property  at  Yat- 
ton, at  present  in  the  possession  of  Mr.  Auorey  ;  and  that, 
had  we  thought  fit,  we  might  have  sought  and  recovered  it 
all  in  the  action  which  has  just  been  decided  in  favor  of  our 
client.  It  is  now  in  our  power  materially  to  strengthen  the 
evidence  adduced  at  the  late  trial ;  and  AVC  beg  to  be  in- 
formed whether  it  is  your  client's  intention  to  put  Mr.  Tit- 
mouse to  the  enormous  expense,  and  the  delay  of  a  second 
trial,  the  issue  of  which  cannot  be  doubtful ;  or,  with  the 
promptitude  and  candor  which  are  to  be  expected  from  a 
gentleman  of  the  station  and  character  of  your  client,  at 
once  yield  to  our  client  the  substantial  fruits  of  his  verdict. 
"  if  his  reasonable  wishes  in  this  matter  be  disregarded, 
we  would  merely  intimate  that  it  will  be  for  your  client 
most  seriously  to  weigh  the  consequences ;  to  see  whether 
such  a  line  of  conduct  may  not  greatly  prejudice  his  in- 
terests, and  place  him  in  a  far  \yorse  position  than,  perhaps, 
he  would  otherwise  have  occupied.  As  we  understand  your 
client  to  be  in  town,  we  trust  you  will  forgive  us  for 
requesting  you  immediately  to  communicate  with  him,  and 
at  your  earliest  convenience  enable  us  to  announce  the  result 
to  our  client. — We  are,  gentlemen,  your  obedient  servants, 

"  QUIRK,  GAMMON,  &  SNAP. 
"  Messrs.  RUNNINGTON  &  Co." 

"  Well— I  own  I  see  nothing  to  find  fault  with  in  this  let- 
ter,"  said  Mr.  Aubrey  calmly,  but  with  a  suppressed  sigh,  as 
soon  as  he  had  read  the  letter. 

"  Rather  quick  work,  too— is  it  not,  Mr.  Aubrey  ?— within 
an  hour  or  two  after  judgment  pronounced  in  their  favor  :— 
but,  to  be  sure,  it's  very  excusable,  when  you  consider  the 
line  of  business  and  the  sort  of  clients  that  Messrs.  Quirk, 
Gammon,  and  Snap  are  accustomed  to." 

"  I  have  made  up  my  mind  as  to  the  course  I  shall  adopt,0 
said  Mr.  Aubrey. 

"  Oh,  of  course,  that  is  quite  clear !  "  said  Mr.  Ruddington, 
pouring  out  his  coffee — ''  we  shall  stand  another  shot,  and 
see  if  there's  ammunition  enough  left  for  the  purpose  :  and 
we'll  tender  a  bill  of  exceptions,  and  carry  the  case  into  the 
Exchequer  chamber,  and  thence  into  the  House  of  Lords— 
ah !  we  11  work  them,  I  warrant  them !  " — and  he  rubbed  his 
hands,  with  a  little  excitement  in  his  manner. 

"  Why,  Mr.  Runningtonn,"  answered  Mr.  Aubrey  gravely, 
"  would  it  not  be  wanton — most  unconscientious  in  me  to  put 
them  to  the  expense  and  anxiety  of  a  second  trial,  when  the 


TEN  THOUSAND  A-YEAS.  365 

whole  case,  on  both  sides,  has  been  fairly  brought  before 
both  the  court  and  the  jury  ?  " 

"  Good  Heavens,  Mr.  Aubrey !  who  ever  heard  of  an  estate 
of  ten  thousand  a-year  being  surrendered  after  one 
assault?" 

"If  it  were  ten  thousand  times  ten  thousand  a-year,  I 
would  submit,  after  such  a  trial  as  ours." 

"  How  do  we  know  what  fraud  and  perjury  may  have  been 
resorted  to  in  order  to  secure  the  late  verdict,  and  which  we 
may  have  the  means  of  exploding  against  the  next  trial !  Ah, 
Mr.  Aubrey,  you  don't  know  the  character  of  Messrs.  Quirk, 
Gammon,  and  Snap  in  the  profession ;  they  learn  a  fresh  trick 
from  every  scoundrel,  swindler,  and  thief,  whose  case  they 
undertake." 

"  I  thought  that  fraud  and  perjury  were  never  to  be  pre- 
sumed, Mr.  Runnington !  Besides,  had  we  not  the  advantage 
of  most  acute  and  experienced  counsel?  How  could  it 
escape  them?" 

"  1  would  only  venture  to  remind  you,"  said  Mr.  Running- 
ton,  firmly  but  respectfully,  "  of  the  observations  of  the 
Attorney-General,  at  our  last  consultation." 

"  I  thought  I  was  unanswered,  Mr.  Runnington,  though  I 
did  not  feel  at  liberty  to  press  the  matter,"  replied  Mr.  Au- 
brey with  a  melancholy  smile. 

"  Excuse  me,  but  we  must  take  the  chance  of  second  trial," 
said  Mr.  Runnington. 

"I  have  decided  upon  the  course  I  shall  adopt,"  replied 
Mr.  Aubrey,  calmly  and  determinedly—"  I  shall  instruct 
you  to  write  this  day  to  the  gentlemen  upon  the  other  side, 
and  inform  them  that  within  three  weeks  I  shall  be  pre- 
pared to  deliver  up  possession  of  Yatton." 

" My  dear  sir ! — Do  I  hear  aright?  Deliver  up  possession 
of  the  estates  ?  and  within  three  weeks  ?" 

"  That  was  what  I  said,  Mr.  Runnington,"  replied  Mr.  Au- 
brey rather  peremptorily. 

"  I  give  you  my  honor,  Mr.  Aubrey,  that  in  the  whole 
course  of  my  practice  I  never  heard  of  such  a  procedure." 

"  And  I  shall  further  request  you  to  state  that  the  last 
quarter's  rents  are  in  my  banker  s  hands,  and  will  be  paid 
over  to  the  order  of  Mr.  Titmouse." 

"  Good  gracious,  Mr.  Aubrey !  "  interrupted  Mr.  Running- 
ton,  with  an  air  of  deep  concern. 

"I  have  well  considered  the  position  in  which  I  am 
placed,"  said  Mr.  Aubrey  with  a  serious  air. 

"  It  is  very  painful  for  me  to  mention  the  subject,  Mr. 
Aubrey ;  but  have  you  adverted  to  the  mesne  profits  ?  " 

"I  have.  It  is,  indeed,  a  very  fearful  matter;  and  I 
frankly  own  that  I  see  no  way  open  before  me,  but  to  trust 
to  the  forbearance  of " 

"  Forbearance  !— The  forbearance  of  Messrs.  Quirk,  Gam- 
mon, and  Snap ! !  or  of  any  one  counselled  by  them ! " 


366  TEN  THOUSAND  A-YEAR. 

"  Why,  what  can  I  do  ?  I  might  as  well  undertake  to  pay 
cff  the  national  debt  as  the  sum  of  sixty  thousand  pounds." 

"That's  just  the  very  thing,"  replied  Mr.  Runnington 
with  a  dismayed  air. 

'*  Whatever  honorable  negotiation  can  effect,  I  leave  it  in 
your  hands  to  do.  With  reference  to  the  time  that  may  be 
obtained  for  the  liquidation  of  it," — Mr.  Aubrey  changed 
color,  but  spoke  with  firmness—"  I  must  own  that  this  is  a 
matter  that  has  occasioned  me  inexpressible  anxiety,  Mr. 
Runnington.  I  really  do  not  see  what  length  of  time  will 
enable  me  to  discharge  so  fearful  a  sum  of  money,  or  even 
to  make  any  sensible  impression  upon  it.  I  am  quite  at  their 
mercy."  Here  both  maintained  a  silence  of  several  minutes' 
duration. 

"  I  am  far  from  thinking  it  clear  that  equity  would  not  in- 
terpose  to  relieve  against  mesne  profits,  in  such  a  case  as  the 
present— a  dormant  claim  set  up." 

"  I  cannot  see,  Mr.  Runnington,  on  what  principle  such  an 
interference  could  be  supported." 

"  No  more  do  I,  at  present,"  replied  Mr,  Runnington,  "  but 
I'll  lose  no  time  in  having  the  best  advice  on  the  subject. 

Gracious  me  !  when  one  thinks  of  it,  it  deprives  one  of " 

at  this  moment  a  thundering  appeal  to  the  knocker  of  the 
door  announced  an  arrival :  and  presently  the  servant  enter- 
ed and  stated  that  Lord  C had  called,  and  was  waiting  in 

the  library.  After  repeating  two  or  three  directions  to  Mr. 
Runnington,  Mr.  Aubrey  begged  to  be  excused,  and  present- 
ly entered  the  library,  where  Lord  C was  waiting  to  re- 
ceive him.  Lord  C was  a  middlfc-aged  man,  tall,  of  elegant 

person,  a  strikingly  handsome  countenance,  and  most  win- 
ning address  ;  he  was  a  thorough  politician,  possessed  of  elo- 
quence, immense  practical  knowledge,  and  a  very  command- 
ing intellect.  He  was  made  for  eminent  office,  and  got  through 
the  most  complicated  and  harassing  business  with  singular 
ease  and  celerity.  He  had  for  several  years  entertained  a 
sincere  regard  for  Mr.  Aubrey,  whom  he  considered  to  be  a 
very  rising  man  in  the  House  of  Commons,  and  who  had  on 
several  occasions,  rendered  him  special  service  in  debate. 
He  had  been  much  shocked  to  hear  of  the  sudden  misfort- 
une which  had  befallen  Mr.  Aubrey ;  and  had  now  come  to  him 
with  a  sincere  desire  to  be  of  service  to  him ;  and  also,  not 
without  a  faint  hope  of  prevailing  upon  him  to  come  down 
that  evening  and  support  them  in  a  very  close  division.  He 
was  as  kind-hearted  a  man  as  a  keen  politician  could  be. 

"  I  am  really  shocked  beyond  expression  to  hear  all  this,  " 
said  he  after  Aubrey  had,  at  his  earnest  request,  explained 
the  position  in  which  he  was  placed ;  the  dreadful  loss  he 
had  sustained,  the  still  more  dreadful  liabilities  to  which  he 
was  subject.  "  Really  who  can  be  safe  ?  It  might  have  hap- 
pened to  me — to  any  of  us?  Forgive  me,  my  dear  Aubrey,'' 
continued  Lord  C earnestly,  "  if  I  venture  to  express  a 


THOUSAND  A-TEAR.  367 

hope  that  at  all  events  Mrs.  Aubrey  and  your  family  are  pro- 
vided for,  and  your  very  lovely  sister ;  she,  I  trust,  is  out  of 
the  reach  of  inconvenience?"  Mr.  Aubrey's  lip  quivered, 
and  he  remained  silent. 

"  Allow  me  a  friend's  freedom,  Aubrey,  and  let  me  repeat 
my  question ;  are  your  family  provided  for?" 

"  I  will  be  frank,  Lord  C ,"  replied  Mr.  Aubrey,  with  a 

strong  effort  to  preserve  his  composure.  "  The  little  that 
was  made  for  them  goes  with  Yatton  :  but  for  them— my 
wife,  my  children,  my  sister— I  could  have  submitted  to  this 
misfortune  with  unshrinking  fortitude ;  but  they  are,  alas, 
involved  in  my  ruin !  My  wife  had  nothing  when  I  married 
her  ;  and  of  course  the  settlements  I  made  on  her  were  out 
of  the  Yatton  property ;  as  also  was  the  little  income  left  my 
sister  by  my  father.  With  Yatton  all  is  gone— that  is  the 
plain  fact ;  and  there  is  no  disguising  it." 

Lord  C seemed  much  moved. 

"  The  Duke  of ,  I,  and  two  or  three  other  of  your  friends, 

were  talking  about  these  matters  last  night ;  we  wish  we 
could  serve  you.  What  is  the  sort  of  foreign  service  you 
would  prefer,  Aubrey  ?  " 

"  Foreign  service,"  echoed  Mr.  Aubrey  significantly. 

"  Yes  ;  an  entire  change  of  scene  would  be  highly  servicea- 
ble in  diverting  your  thoughts  from  the  distressing  subjects 
which  here  occupy  them,  and  must  continue  to  occupy  them 
for  sometime  to  come." 

"  It  is  very  kindly  meant,  Lord  C ;  but  dp  you  really 

think  I  can  for  a  single  moment  entertain  the  idea  of  quit- 
ting the  country  to  escape  from  pecuniary  liability  ?  " 

"  That's  the  point  exactly  ;  I  cfecidedly  think  you  ought  to 

do  so  ;  that  you  must?  replied  Lord  C in  a  matter-of-fact 

manner. 

"  Nothing  upon  earth  shall  induce  me  to  do  so,"  replied  Mr. 
Aubrey  firmly.  "  The  bare  idea  shocks  me.  It  would  be  the 
meanest,  most  unprincipled  conduct — it  would  reflect  dis- 
grace on  the  King's  service." 

"Poh— this  i 
sure  that  when 
ently.    Upon 

life.  Are  you  to  stay  at  home,  to  have  your  hands  tied  be- 
hind your  back,  and  be  thrust  into  prison — to  court  destruc- 
tion for  yourself  and  your  family  ?  "  Mr.  Aubrey  turned 
aside  his  head,  and  remained  silent. 

"  I  must  plead  in  favor  of  Mrs.  Aubrey— your  children— 
your  sweet  lovely  sister ; — good  God!  it's  quite  shocking  to 
think  of  what  you  are  bringing  them  to." 

"You  torture  my  feelings,  Lord  C ,"  said  Mr.  Aubrey 

tremulously  and  very  pale ;  "  but  you  do  not  convince  my 
judgment.  Every  dictate  of  conscience  and  honor  combines 
to  assure  me  that  I  should  not  listen  to  your  proposal." 

"  Good  God !  what  an  outrage  on  common  sense !— But  has 


368  TEN  THOUSAND  A-YEAR. 

anything  been  yet  said  on  the  subject  of  these  liabilities-* 
these  mestie  profits,  as  I  suppose  they  are  called  ?  " 

"  Nothing ;  but  they  follow  as  a  matter  of  course-" 

"  How  is  it  that  you  owe  only  sixty  thousand  pounds,  Au- 
brey ?  " 

"  Only  sixty  thousand ! " 

"  At  the  rate  of  ten  thousand  a-year,  you  must  have  had 
at  least  a  hundred  thousand  pounds  of  the  money  belonging 
to  your  successor — 

'  The  statute  of  limitations  prevents  more  than  six  years' 
arrears  being  recoverable. 

"But  do  you  intend,  Aubrey,  to  avail  yourself  of  such  a 
protection  against  the  just  claims  of  this  poor,  unfortunate, 
ill-used  gentleman  ?  Are  not  the  remaining  forty  thousand 
pounds  Justly  due— money  of  his  which  you  have  been  making 
away  with  ?  Will  you  let  a  mere  technical  rule  of  law  out- 
weigh the  dictates  of  honor  and  conscience  ?  " 

"  I  really  don't  exactly  understand  your  drift,  Lord  C ," 

said  Mr.  Aubrey,  coloring  visibly  and  rapidly. 

"  Your  sovereign  has  a  right  to  command  your  services  ; 
and,  by  obeying  him  and  serving  your  country,  you  are  en- 
abled to  prevent  a  malignant  opponent  from  ruin  ing  you  and 
S)ur  family,  by  extorting  a  vast  sum  of  money  not  equita- 
y  due  :  I  protest  I  see  no  difference  in  principle,  Aubrey, 
between  availing  yourself  of  the  statute  of  limitations,  and  of 
the  call  of  the  king  to  foreign  service  ;— but  we  must  talk  of 
this  again.    By  the  way,  what  is  the  name  of  your  worthy 
opponent?  Tittlemouse,  or  some  such  strange  name  ?" 

Titmouse !— By  the  way,  you  lose  a  seat  for  Yatton,"  said 
Aubrey,  with  a  faint  smile. 

Lord  C— —  pricked  up  his  ears.    "  Ay,  ay !  how's  that  ?  " 
"The  gentleman  you  have  named  professes,  I  understand, 
Liberal  principles ;  probably  he  will  sit  for  the  borough  him- 
self ;  at  all  events,  he  will  return  the  member." 

"  He's  a  poor  ignorant  creature,  isn't  he  ?  What  has  made 
him  take  up  with  Liberal  principles  ?  By  taking  a  little 
notice  of  him  early,  one  might— eh  ? — influence  him ;— but — 
of  course  you  don  t  intend  to  vacate  this  session  ?" 

"  I  intend  this  day  to  apply  for  the  Chiltern  Hundreds ; 
and  this  evening,  if  you  like,  a  new  writ  may  be  moved  for 
the  borough  of  Yatton." 

"  You  must  come  down   to-night,  my  dear  Aubrey,  you 

really  must,"  said  Lord  C ,  with  undisguised  anxiety— 

with  more  than  he  had  shown  during  the  interview.  "  The 
numbers  will  run  very  close ;  they  are  stirring  heaven  and 
earth;— good  heavens!  my  dear  Aubrey,  a  vote's  invaluable 
to-night ;— Gad,  you  shan  t  have  the  Chiltern  Hundreds  ;  you 
mustn't  really  apply  for  it— at  all  events,  not  till  to-morrow." 

"  I  shall  sit  no  more  in  the  House  of  Commons,"  said  Mr. 
Aubrey,  with  a  sad  determined  air ;  "  besides,  I  leave  for 


TEN  THOUSAND  A-YEAR.  369 

^Tatton  by  tonight's  mail.  There  are  those  waiting  for  me 
wi\om  you  would  not  have  me  disappoint,  L^rd  C !  " 

'  Not  for  worlds,  my  dear  Aubrey,"  replied  Lord  C , 

halt  absently ;  he  was  intensely  disappointed  at  not  obtaining 
Mr.  Aubrey  s  vote  that  evening  ;  and  rose  to  go. 

"  Then  I  direct  to  Yatton,  wnen  I  have  occasion  to  write 
to  you?"  said  he. 

"For  the  next  three  weeks  only.  My  movements  after 
that  period  are  not  yet  fixed." 

"  Adieu,  Aubrey ;  and  I  entreat  of  you  to  remember  me 
most  sincerely  to  Mrs.  Aubrey  and  your  sister ;  and  when 
you  look  at  them,  remember — remember  our  conversation  of 
to-day." 

With  this  Lord  C—  -  took  his  departure,  and  left  poor 
Aubrey  much  depressed.  He  quickly,  however,  roused  him- 
self, and  occupied  the  principal  part  of  the  day  making  the 
necessary  and  melancholy  arrangements  for  breaking  up  his 
establishment  in  Grosyenor  Street,  and  for  disposing  of  his 
wines,  books,  and  furniture  at  Yatton.  He  also  instructed  a 
house  agent  to  look  out  for  two  or  three  respectable  but 
small  houses  in  the  outskirts  of  town,  out  of  which  they 
might  choose  the  one  which  should  appear  most  suitable  to 
himself  and  Mrs.  Aubrey,  on  their  arrival  in  London.  About 
eight  o'clock  he  got  into  the  York  mail,  and  his  heart  was 
heavy  within  him. 


CHAPTER  XVI. 

THE  result  of  a  very  long  consultation  between  Mr.  Run- 
nington  and  his  partners,  held  on  the  day  after  his  last  inter- 
view with  Mr.  Aubrey,  was,  that  he  drew  up  the  following 
draft  of  a  letter,  addressed  to  Messrs.  Quirk,  Gammon,  and 
Snap  :— 

"  Lincoln's  Inn,  26th  April,  18 — 

"  GENTLEMEN  :  , 

"  Doe  d.  Titmouse  v.  Jblter. 

"  In  answer  to  your  letter  of  yesterday,  (the  25th  inst.,)  we 
beg  to  inform  you,  that  after  the  judgment  in  this  cause  pro- 
nounced yesterday  in  the  Court  of  King's  bench,  our  client, 
Mr.  Aubrev,  does  not  intend  to  resist  the  claim  of  Mr.  Tit- 
mouse to  the  residue  of  the  Yatton  property.  We  now,  there- 
fore, beg  to  give  you  notice  that  on  the  17th  of  next  month 
you  will  be  at  liberty,  on  behalf  of  your  client  Mr.  Titmouse, 
to  take  possession  of  all  the  property  at  Yatton,  at  present  in 
the  possession  of  Mr.  Aubrey.  The  whole  of  the  last  quarter's 
rents,  due  at  Lady-day,  have  been  paid  into  the  bank  of 
Messrs.  Harley,  at  Grilston,  and  will,  on  the  17th  of  May,  be 
placed  at  the  disposal  of  your  client. 


370  TEN  THOUSAND  A-YEAIt. 

/'We  are  also  instructed  to  request  the  delivery  of  youf 
bill  at  as  early  a  period  as  may  suit  your  convenience,  witt  a 
view  to  its  immediate  examination  and  settlement. 

"We  cannot  forbear  adding,  while  thus  implicitly  follow- 
ing the  instructions  of  our  client,  our  very  great  surprise  and 
regret  at  the  coarse  which  he  has  thought  fit  to  adopt ;  since 
we  have  the  strongest  reasons  for  believing,  that  had  he  been 
disposed  to  contest  your  client's  claim  further,  in  accordance 
with  advice  received  from  a  high  quarter,  his  case  would 
have  been  materially  strengthened,  and  your  difficulties 
greatly  increased.  We  feel  confident  that  the  magnanimity 
displayed  by  our  client,  will  be  duly  appreciated  by  yours. 

"  We  are,  Gentlemen,  your 
"  obedient  servants, 

"RUNNINGTON  &  Co. 

"  Messrs.  QUIRK,  GAMMON,  &  SNAP.'' 

"  Really,"  said  Mr.  Runnington,  when  he  had  read  over  the 
above  to  his  partners,  "  I  must  throw  in  a  word  or  two  about 
those  infernal  mesne  profits — yet  it's  a  very  ticklish  subject, 
especially  with  such  people  as  these. 

One  partner  shook  his  head,  and  the  other  looked  very 
thoughtful. 

"  We  must  not  compromise  Mr.  Aubrey,"  said  the  former. 

"We  have  had  no  instructions  on  that  point,"  said  the  lat- 
ter, — "on  the  contrary,  you  told  us  yourself  that  your  in- 
structions were  to  announce  an  unconditional  surrender." 

tt  That  may  be ;  but  in  so  desperate  a  business  as  this,  I  do 
think  we  have  a  discretion  to  exercise  on  behalf  of  himself 
and  family,  '\ybich,  I  must  say,  he  seems  quite  incapable  of 
exercising  himself.  Nay,  upon  my  honor,  I  think  we  are 
bound  not  to  forego  the  slightest  opportunity  of  securing  an 
advantage  for  our  client." 

His  partners  seemed  struck  with  his  observation ;  and  Mr. 
Runnington,  after  a  few  moments'  consideration,  added  the 
following  postscript : — 

"P.S.— As  to  the  mesne  profits,  by  the  way,  of  course  we 
anticipate  no  difficulty  in  effecting  an  amicable  arrangement 
satisfactory  to  both  parties,  due  consideration  being  had  for 
the  critical  position  in  which  our  client  finds  himself  so  sud- 
denly and  unexpectedly  placed.  Indeed  it  is  not  difficult  to 
conceive  that  Mr.  Aubrey,  in  taking  the  step  of  which  we 

have  above  advised  you,  must  have  contemplated -"  (here 

Mr.  Runnington  paused  for  a  considerable  time,)  "  being  met 
in  a  similar  frank,  liberal,  and  equitable  spirit." 

It  was  agreed,  at  length,  that  the  whole  amount  and  effect 
of  the  above  postscript  ought  to  be  regarded  as  a  spontaneous 
suggestion  of  Messrs.  Runnington's,  not  in  any  way  implicat- 
ing, or  calculated  in  any  event  to  annoy,  Mr.  Aubrey ;  and  a 
fair  copy  of  the  letter  and  postscript  having  been  made,  it 


TEN  THOUSAND  A-TEAE.  37t 

signed  by  the  head  of  the  firm,  and  forthwith  despatched 
to  Saffron  Hill. 

''Struck,  by  Jove,  Gammon!"  exclaimed  Mr.  Quirk,  as 
with  the  above  letter  open  in  his  hands,  he  hurried,  the  in- 
stant that  he  had  read  it,  into  the  room  of  his  wily  partner, 
and  put  the  letter  into  his  hands.  Gammon  read  it  with  ap- 
parent calmness,  but  a  slight  flush  overspread  his  cheek ;  and, 
as  he  finished  the  perusal,  a  subdued  smile  of  excitement  and 
triumph  stole  over  his  countenance. 

"Lord,  Gammon!  isn't  it  glorious?"  quoth  Mr.  Quirk, 
heatedly,  rubbing  his  hands  together ;  "  give  us  your  hand, 
Gammon !  We've  fought  a  precious  hard  battle  together  " 
and  he  shook  his  partner's  hand  with  vehement  cordiality. 
"  This  fellow  Aubrey  is  a  trump — isn't  he  ?— Egad,  if  I'd  been 
in  his  shoes— one  way  or  another,  I'd  have  stuck  at  Yatton 
for  a  dozen  years  to  come— ah,  ha ! " 

"  Yes,  I  am  sure  you  would  if  you  had  been  able,"  replied 
Gammon  dryly,  and  with  a  smile. 

"Ay,  that  I  would,"  replied  Mr.  Quirk,  with  a  triumphant 
chuckle ;  "  but  now  to  come  to  business.  By  next  quarter- 
day  Titmouse  will  have  £5000  in  hard  cash, — half  of  it  on  the 
17th  of  next  month.— Lord !  what  have  we  done  for  him  !  " 
he  added,  with  a  sort  of  sigh. 

«  We've  put  an  ape  into  possession  of  Paradise — that's  all " 
— said  Gammon,  absently  and  half  aloud,  and  bitterly  and 
contemptuously. 

"  By  the  way,  Gammon,  you  see  what's  said  about  our  Bill 
—eh  ?  The  sooner  it's  made  out  the  better,  I  should  say— 
and— ahem  !  hem !— while  Mr.  Aubrey's  on  the  tight  rope  he 
won't  think  of  looking  down  at  the  particular  items,  will  he  ? 
I  should  say,  now's  our  time,  and  strike  while  the  iron's  hot ! 
I've  got  rather  a  stiff  entry,  I  can  assure  you.  I  must  say, 
Snap  s  done  his  duty,  and  I've  not  had  my  eyes  shut— ahem !  " 
here  Mr.  Quirk  winked  very  knowingly. 

"  You  must  not  over-do  it,  Mr.  Quirk — but  all  that  I  leave, 
as  usual,  to  your  admirable  management  as  to  that  of  a  first- 
rate  man  of  business.  You  know  I'm  a  sad  hand  at  accounts ; 
but  you  and  Snap  are— y9u'll  do  all  that  should  be  done." 

"Ay,  ay— trust  us!"  interrupted  Quirk  quickly,  with  a 
signihcant  nod,  and  fancying  himself  and  Snap  already  at 
work,  plundering  the  poor  Aubreys.  "And,  by  the  way, 
Gammon,  there  are  the  mesne  profits — that's  mighty  fine 
postscript  of  theirs,  isn't  it?"  and,  replacing  his  spectacles, 
he  read  over  the  postscript  aloud.  "All  niy  eye,  of  course ! '' 
he  added,  as  he  laid  down  the  letter,— c;  but  I  suppose  one 
must  give  'em  a  little  time ;  it  is  a  little  hard  on  him  just  at 
present ;  but  then  to  be  sure,  that's  his  look-out—not  ours  or 
Titmouse's.  Off  hand,  I  should  say  we  ought  to  be  content 
with — say— twenty  thousand  down,  and  the  rest  in  two  years, 
time,  so  as  to  give  him  time  to  look  about  him  a  little — 

"  That  will  be  quite  aa  after  consideration,"  said  Mr.  Gam- 


372 


TEN  THOUSAND  A-YEAE. 


mon,  who,  for  the  last  few  minutes,  had  appeared  lost  in 
thought. 

"  Egad — an  after  consideration  ?  Hang  me  if  I  think  so, 
Gammon !  There's  a  certain  bond—  eh  ?  you  recollect — 

"  I  assure  you,  Mr.  Quirk,  that  my  eye  is  fixed  quite  as 
steadily  and  anxiously  on  that  point  as  yours,"  said  Gammon 
gravely. 

"  Thank  you— thank  you,  Gammon !  "  replied  Quirk  with 
rather  a  relieved  air—"  it  couldn't  possibly  be  in  better  hands. 
Lud — to  go  wrong  there !  It  would  send  me  to  my  grave  at 
a  hand  gallop — it  would,  so  help  me  Heaven,  Gammon— Tit- 
mouse is  a  queer  hand  to  deal  with,  isn't  he?  Wasn't  he 
strange  and  bumptious  the  other  day?  Egad,  it  made  me 
quake!  Need  we  tell  him  just  yet,"  he  dropped  his  voice,  "of 
the  letter  we've  got !  Couldn't  we  safely  say  only  they  have 
sent  us  word  that  we  shall  have  Yatton  by  the  17th  ? 

"Very  great  caution  is  necessary,  Mr.  Quirk,  just  now 

"  You  don't  think  the  young  scamp's  going  to  turn  round 
on  us,  and  snap  his  fingers  in  our  face,  eh  ?  "  inquired  Mr. 
Quirk  apprehensively,  violently  twirling  about  his  watch- 
key. 

"  If  you  leave  him  implicitly  to  me,  you  shall  get  all  you 
want,"  replied  Gammon,  very  gravely,  and  very  pointedly. 
Quirk's  color  changed  a  little,  as  he  felt  the  keen  gray  eye  of 
Gammon  fixed  upon  him,  and  he  involuntarily  shrunk  under 
it. 

"  You'll  excuse  me,  Gammon,"  at  length  said  he,  with 
rather  a  disturbed  air ;  "  but  there's  no  fathoming  you,  when 
you  get  into  one  of  your  mysterious  humors  ;  and  you  always 
look  so  particularly  strange  whenever  you  get  on  this  sub- 
ject !  What  can  you  know  that  I  don't— or  ought  not  ?  " 

"  Nothing— nothing,  I  assure  you,"  replied  Gammon  with  a 
gay  smile. 

"  Well,  I  should  have  thought  not.  But  coming  back  to 
the  main  point,  if  one  could  but  touch  some  part  of  that  same 
ten  thousand  pounds,  I  shoidd  be  a  happy  man  !— Consider, 
Gammon,  what  a  draught  there  has  been  on  my  purse  for  this 
last  sixteen  months." 

"  Well,  can  you  doubt  being  soon  richly  repaid,  my  dear 
sir  ?  Only  don't  be  too  hasty. 

"  I  take  it,  Gammon,  we've  a  lien  on  the  rents  in  the  bank- 
er's hands,  and  to  become  due  next  quarter-day,  and  on  the 
first  instalment  of  the  mesne  profits,  both  for  our  bill  of  costs, 
and  in  respect  of  that  same  bond  ?  " 

"Mesne  profits,  Mr.  Quirk?"  echoed  Gammon,  rather 
quickly ;  "  you  seem  to  take  it  for  granted  that  they  are  all 
ready  to  be  paid  over!  Even  supposing  Titmouse  not  to  grow 
restive,  do  you  suppose  it  probable  that  Mr.  Aubrey,  after  so 
vast  and  sudden  a  sacrifice,  can  have  more  than  a  very  few 
thousands — probably  hundreds — to  keep  him  from  imme- 


TEN  THOUSAND  A-YEAR.  378 

diate  want,  since  we  have  reason  to  believe  he  has  got  no 
other  resources  than  Yatton  ?  " 

"Not  got  'em— not  got  'em?  D— n  him !  then  he  must  look 
sharp  and  get  'em,  that's  all !  You  know  we  can't  be  trifled 
with  ;  we  must  look  after  the  interests  of— Titmouse.  And 
what's  he  to  start  with,  if  there's  no  mesne  profits  forth- 
coming? But,  hang  it!  they  must:  I  should  say,  a  gentle 
pressure,  by  and  by,  as  soon  as  he's  fairly  out  of  Yatton, 
must  produce  money,  or  security — he  must  know  quantities 
of  people  of  rank  and  substance  that  would  rush  forward, 
if  they  once  heard  him  squeal : 

"  An,  you're  for  putting  the  thumb-screws  on  at  once— 
eh  ? "  inquired  Gammon  with  subdued  energy,  and  a  very 
strange  sort  of  smile. 

"Ay— capital— that's  just  what  I  meant," — quoth  Quirk. 

"  Heartless  old  scoundrel!  "  thought  Gammon,  almost  ex- 
pressing as  much  ;  but  his  momentary  excitement  passed  off 
unobserved  by  Mr.  Quirk.  "And,  I  must  say,  I  agree  with 
you,"  he  added ;  "we  ought  in  justice  to  see  you  first  reim- 
bursed your  very  heavy  outlays,  Mr.  Quirk." " 

"Well,  that's  honorable,  Gammon.— Oh,  Gammon,  how  I 
wnsAyou  would  let  me  make  a  friend  of  you  ! "  suddenly  add- 
ed Mr.  Quirk,  eyeing  wistfully  his  surprised  companion. 

"  If  you  have  one  sincere,  disinterested  friend  in  the  world, 
Mr.  Quirk,  he  is  to  be  found  in  Oily  Gammon,"  said  that 
gentleman,  throwing  great  warmth  into  his  manner,  per- 
ceiving that  Mr.  Quirk  was  laboring  with  some  communica- 
tion of  which  he  wished  to  deliver  himself. 

"  Gammon,  Gammon,  how  I  wish  1  could  think  so!  "replied 
Quirk,  looking  earnestly,  yet  half  distrustingly,  at  Gammon, 
and  fumbling  about  his  hands  in  his  pockets.  The  mild  and 
friendly  expression  of  Gammon's  countenance,  however,  in- 
vited communicativeness ;  and  after  softly  opening  and  shut- 
ting the  two  doors,  to  ascertain  that  no  one  was  trying  to 
overhear  what  might  be  passing,  he  returned  to  his  chair, 
which  he  drew  closer  to  Gammon,  who  noticed  this  air  of 
preparation  with  not  a  little  curiosity. 

"  I  may  be  wrong,  Gammon,"  commenced  Mr.  Quirk,  in  a 
low  tone ;  "  but  I  do  believe  you've  always  felt  a  kind  of  per- 
sonal friendship  towards  me ;  and  there  ought  to  be  no 
secrets  among  friends.  Friends,  indeed  ?  Perhaps  its  prema- 
ture to  mention  so  small  a  matter ;  but  at  a  certain  silver- 
smith's, riot  a  thousand  miles  from  the  Strand,  there's  at  this 
moment  in  hand,  as  a  present  from  me  to  you— "  [Oh  dear, 
dear !  Mr.  Quirk !  what  a  shocking  untruth !  and  at  your 
advanced  period  of  life,  too !  ]— "  as  elegant  a  gold  snuff-box 
as  can  be  made,  with  a  small  inscription  on  the  lid.  I  hope 
you  won't  value  it  the  less  for  its  being  the  gift  of  old  Caleb 
Quirk—  -"  he  paused,  and  looked  earnestly  at  Mr.  Gammon. 

"  My  dear  Mr.  Quirk,  you  have  taken  me,  said  he  apparent- 
ly with  great  emotion,  "  quite  by  surprise.  Value  it  r  I  will 


374  TEN  THOUSAND  A-YEAR. 

preserve  to  the  latest  moment  of  my  life,  as  a  memorial  of  one 
whom  the  more  I  know  of,  the  more  1  respect  and  admire ! " 

"  You,  Gammon,  are  in  your  prime  -scarce  even  that— but 

I  am  growing  old "  tears  appeared  to  glisten  in  the  old 

gentleman's  eyes;  Gammon,  much  moved,  shook  him  cordi- 
ally by  the  hand  in  silence,  wondering  what  upon  earth  was 
coming  next.  "  Yes ; — old  Caleb  Quirk's  day  is  drawing  to 
a  close— I  feel  it,  Gammon,  I  feel  it !  But  I  shall  leave  behind 
me— a— a— child— an  only  daughter,  Gammon  ; "  that  gentle- 
man gazed  at  the  speaker  with  an  expression  of  respectful 
sympathy ; — "  Dora !  I  don't  think  you  can  have  known. 
Dora  so  long,  Gammon,  without  feeling  a  leetle  interest  in 
her!  "  Here  Gammon's  color  mounted  rapidly,  and  he  look- 
ed with  feelings  of  a  novel  description  at  nis  senior  partner. 
Could  it  be  possible  that  old  Quirk  wished  to  bring  about  a 
match  between  his  daughter  and  Gammon  ?  His  thoughts 
were  for  a  moment  confused.  All  he  could  do  was  to  bow 
with  an  earnest— an  anxious— a  deprecating  air ;  and  Mr. 
Quirk,  rather  hurriedly,  proceeded,—"  and  when  I  assure 
you,  Gammon,  that  it  is  in  your  power  to  make  an  old  friend 
and  his  only  daughter  happy  and  proud,"— Gammon  began 
to  draw  very  long  breaths,  and  to  look  more  and  more  appre- 
hensively at  his  senior  partner,—"  in  short,  my  dear  friend 
Gammon,  let  me  out  with  it  at  once— my  daughter's  in  love 
with  Titmouse." 

["  Whew ! "  thought  Gammon,  suddenly  and  infinitely  re- 
lieved.] 

"Ah,  my  dear  Mr.  Quirk,  is  that  all  ?  "  he  exclaimed,  and 
shook  Mr.  Quirk  cordially  by  the  hand,--"  at  length  you  have 
made  a  friend  of  me  indeed.  But,  to  tell  you  the  truth,  I 
have  long  suspected  as  much :  I  have  indeed !  " 

"  Have  you  really  ?  Well !  there  is  no  accounting  for 
tastes,  is  there— especially  among  the  women  ?  Poor  Dora's 
over  head  and  ears— quite ! — she  is,  so  help  me  Heaven ! " 
continued  Quirk  energetically. 

"  Well,  my  dear  sir,  and  why  this  surprise  ?  "  said  Gam- 
mon earnestly.  "  I  consider  Titmouse  to  be  a  very  handsome 
young  fellow ;  and  that  he  is  already  rapidly  acquiring  very 
gentlemanly  manners  ;  and  as  to  his  fortune— really,  it  would 
be  most  desirable  to  bring  it  about.  Indeed,  the  sooner  his 
heart's  fixed,  and  his  word's  pledged,  the  better— for  you 
must  of  course  be  aware  that  there  will  be  many  schemers 
on  the  look-out  to  entrap  his  frank  and  inexperienced  nature 
—look,  for  instance,  at  Tag-rag." 

"  Eugh ! "  exclaimed  Mr.  Quirk,  with  a  sudden  motion  of 
sickening  disgust— "the  old  beast!— I  smoked  him  long 
ago!  Now,  that  I  call  villainy,  Gammon ;  infernal  villainy.' 
Don't  you?" 

"  Indeed,  indeed,  Mr.  Quirk,  I  do ;  I  quite  agree  with  you ! 
Upon  my  honor,  I  think  it  is  a  part  of  even  my  duty  towards 


TEN  THOUSAND  A-YEAR.  375 

our  olient,  if  possible,  to  protect  him  against  such  infamous 
designs." 

" Right— right,  Gammon;  by  Joye,  you're  quite  right— I 
guite  agree  with  you !  "  replied  Quirk  earnestly,  not  observ 
ing  the  lambent  smile  upon  the  features  of  his  calm,  crafty, 
and  sarcastic  companion. 

"  You  see,"  said  Gammon,  "we've  a  very  delicate  and  diffi- 
cult game  to  play  with  old  Tag-rag.  He's  certainly  a  toad, 
ugly  and  venomous— but  then  he's  got  a  jewel  in  his  head — 
he's  got  money,  you  know,  and,  to  serve  our  purposes,  we 
must  really  give  him  some  hopes  about  his  daughter  and 
Titmouse.'* 

"Faugh!  eugh!  feugh !  Nasty  wretch!  a  little  trollop! 
It  makes  one  sick  to  near  of  her !  And,  by  the  way,  now 
we're  on  that  subject,  Gammon,  what  do  we  want  of  this 
wretch  Tag-rag,  now  that  Titmouse  has  actually  got  the 
property  ?  " 

"  Want  of  him  ?  Money — security,  my  dear  sir ! — money ! " 

"  But,  curse  me !  (excuse  me,  Gammon,)  why  go  to  Tag- 
rag  ?  That's  what  I  can't  understand  !  Surely  any  one  will 
advance  almost  any  amount  of  money  to  Titmouse,  with 
such  security  as  he  can  give." 

"  Very  possibly — probably — 

"Possibly?  Why,  I  myself  don't  mind  advancing  him 
five  thousand — nay,  ten  thousand  pounds — when  we've  once 
got  hold  of  the  title-deeds." 

"My  dear  sir,"  interrupted  Gammon,  calmly,  but  with  a 
very  serious  air,  and  a  slight  change  of  color  which  did  not 
happen  to  attract  the  notice  of  his  eager  companion,  "  there 
are  reasons  why  I  should  dissuade  you  from  doing  so ;  upon 
my  word,  there  are ;  further  than  that  I  do  not  think  it 
necessary  to  go ;  but  I  have  gone  far  enough,  I  know  well,  to 
do  you  a  real  service." 

Mr.  Quirk  listened  to  all  this  with  an  air  of  the  utmost 
amazement — even  open-mouthed  amazement.  "  What  rea- 
son, Gammon,  can  there  be  against  my  advancing  money  on 
a  security  worth  more  than  a  hundred  times  the  sum  bor- 
rowed?" he  inquired,  wdth  visible  distrust,  of  his  com- 
panion. 

"  I  can  but  assure  you,  that  were  I  called  upon  to  say 
whether  I  would  advance  a  serious  sum  of  money  to  Tit- 
mouse, on  the  security  of  the  Yatton  estates,  I  should  at  all 
events  require  a  more  substantial  collateral  security." 

"  Mystery  again !  "  exclaimed  Mr.  Quirk,  a  sigh  of  vexation 
escaping  him.  "You'll  excuse  me,  Gammon,  but  you'd 
puzzle  an  angel,  to  say  nothing  of  the  devil !  May  I  presume 
for  one  moment,  so  far  on  our  personal  and  professional  re- 
lationship, as  to  ask  what  the  reason  is  on  which  your  ad- 
vice rests?" 

"Mere  caution— excessive  caution— anxiety  to  place  you 


376  TEN  THOUSAND  A-TEAR. 

out  of  the  way  of  all  risk.  Surely,  is  your  borrower  so  soon 
to  be  pronounced  firm  in  the  saddle  ? 

"  If  you  know  anything,  Gammon,  that  I  don't,  it's  your 
bounden  duty  to  communicate  it.  Look  at  our  articles  !  " 

"  It  is ;  but  do  I  know  anything?  Prove  that,  Mr.  Quirk, 
and  you  need  trouble  yourself  no  more.  But,  in  the  mean 
while  (without  saying  now  much  I  feel  hurt  at  your  evident 
distrust),  I  have  but  a  word  or  two  further  to  add  on  this 
point." 

When  Mr.  Gammon  chose,  he  could  assume  an  expression 
of  feature,  a  tone  of  voice,  and  a  manner  which  indicated  to 
the  person  he  was  addressing,  that  he  was  announcing  a  ma- 
tured opinion,  an  inflexible  determination — and  this,  more- 
over, in  the  calmest,  quietest  way  imaginable.  Thus  it  was 
that  he  now  said  to  Mr.  Quirk,  "  My  opinion  is,  that  you 
should  get  some  third  party  or  parties  to  advance  any  re- 
quired sum,  and  prevail  upon  Tag-rag  to  join  in  a  collateral 
security,  without — if  possible — making  him  aware  of  the  ex- 
tent of  liability  he  is  incurring.  By  exciting  him  with  the 
ridiculous  notion  of  an  attachment  between  his  daughter 
and  Titmouse,  he  may  be  induced  to  give  his  signature,  as 
to  some  complimentary  matter  of  form  only.— Now,  that's 
my  opinion,  Mr.  Quirk ;  not  lightly  or  hastily  formed ;  and 
it  rests  upon  a  deep  feeling  of  personal  regard  towards  you, 
and  also  our  common  interests." 

Mr.  Quirk  had  listened  to  this  communication  in  perturb- 
ed silence,  eyeing  the  speaker  with  a  ludicrous  expression  of 
mingled  chagrin,  apprehension,  and  bewilderment.  "  Gam- 
mon," at  length  said  he,  affecting  a  smile,  "  do  you  remem- 
ber when  you  and  I,  and  Dora,  went  to  the  play  to  see  some 
German  thing  or  other— Foss  was  the  name,  wasn't  it  ?  " 

"  Faust— Faust,"  interrupted  Gammon  curiously. 

"  Well ;  and  now,  what  was  the  name  of  that  fellow  that 
was  always— Meth — Me  ph— what  was  it  ?  " 

"  Mephistophiles,"  replied  Gammon,  unable  to  repress  a 
smile. 

"  Ah— yes  !  so  it  was.  That's  all ;  I  only  wanted  to  think 
of  the  name— I'd  forgotten  it.  I  beg  your  pardon,  Gammon." 

This  was  poor  Mr.  Quirk's  way  of  being  very  sarcastic 
with  his  friend.  He  thought  that  he  had  now  cut  him  to 
the  very  quick. 

"  If  it  hadn't  been  for  what's  passed  between  us  to-day, 
Gammon,  I  should  almost  begin  to  think  that  you  were  not 
sincere  in  your  friendship 

"  Did  I  ever  deceive  you  ?  Did  I  ever  attempt  to  overreach 
you  in  anything,  Mr.  Quirk  ?  " 

"N — o— o — ,"  replied  Mr.  Quirk— but  not  in  the  readiest 
manner,  or  most  confident  tone  in  the  world, — "  I  certainly 
can't  say  I  ever  found  you  out— but  I'll  tell  you  what,  we 
each  keep  a  precious  sharp  look-out  after  each  other, 


TEN  THOUSAND  A-TEAB.  377 

don't  we?"  he  inquired,  with  a  faint  smile,  which  seemed 
for  a  moment  reflected  upon  the  face  of  Gammon. 

"  How  long."  said  he,  "  I  am  to  be  the  subject  of  such  un- 
kind suspicions,  I  do  not  know  ;  but  your  nature  is  suspicious  ; 
and  as  every  one  has  his  fault,  that  is  the  alloy  in  the  other- 
wise pure  gold  of  your  manly,  kind,  and  straightforward 
character.  Time  may  show  how  you  have  wronged  me.  My 
anxious  wish  is,  Mr.  Quirk,  to  see  your  daughter  occupy  a 
position  in  which  we  may  all  be  proud  to  see  her."  Here  a 
smile  shot  across  Quirk's  anxious  countenance,  like  evening 
sunshine  on  troubled  waters. 

''I  do  really  believe,  Gammon,"  said  he  eagerly,  "that 
Dora's  just  the  kind  of  girl  to  suit  Titmouse  — 

"  So,  indeed,  my  dear  sir,  do  I.  There's  a  mingled  softness 
and  spirit  in  Miss  Quirk— 

"  She's  a  good  girl,  a  good  girl,  Gammon  !  I  hope  he'll  use 
her  well  if  he  gets  her."  His  voice  trembled.  f'  She's  got 
very  much  attached  to  him  !  Gad,  she's  quite  altered  lately; 
and  my  sister  tells  me  that  she's  always  playing  dismal 
music  when  he's  not  there.  But  we  can  talk  over  these 
matters  at  another  time.  Gad,  Gammon,  you  can't  think 
how  it's  relieved  me,  to  open  my  mind  to  you  on  this  mat- 
ter! We  quite  understand  one  another  now,  Gammon  — 
eh?" 

"Quite,"  replied  Gammon,  pointedly;  and  Mr.  Quirk  hav- 
ing quitted  the  room,  the  former  prepared  to  answer  Messrs. 
Runnington's  letter.  But  first  he  leaned  back,  and  reflected 
on  several  points  of  their  late  conversation.  Of  course  he 
had  resolved  that  Miss  Quirk  should  never  become  Mrs.  Tit- 
mouse. And  what  struck  him  as  not  a  little  singular 


this,  viz.  that  Mr.  Quirk  should  have  made  no  observation 
on  the  circumstance  that  Gammon  allowed  him  to  risk  his 
daughter,  and  her  all,  upon  chances  which  he  pronounced  too 
frail  to  warrant  advancing  a  thousand  or  two  of  money! 
Yet  so  it  was. 

This  was  the  answer  he  presently  wrote  to  the  letter  of 
Messrs.  Runnington  :— 

.Saffron  Hill. 
"  GENTLEMEN  : 

"  Doe,  d    Titmouse  v.  Jblter. 

"  We  are  favored  with  your  letter  of  this  day's  date  ;  and 
beg  to  assure  you  how  very  highly  we  appreciate  the  prompt 
and  honorable  course  which  has  been  taken  by  your  client, 
under  circumstances  calculated  to  excite  the  greatest  possible 
commiseration.  Every  expression  of  respectful  sympathy, 
on  our  parts,  and  on  that  of  our  client,  Mr.  Titmouse,  which 
you  may  think  fit  to  convey  to  your  distinguished  client,  is 
his. 

"  We  shall  be  prepared  to  receive  possession  of  the  Yatton 
estates  on  the  day  you  mention—  namely,  the  17th  May  next, 


378  TEN  THOUSAND  A-YEAR. 

on  behalf  of  our  client,  Mr.  Titmouse ;  on  whose  behalf,  also, 
we  beg  to  thank  you  for  your  communication  concerning  the 
last  quarter's  rents. 

"  With  reference  to  the  question  of  the  mesne  profits,  we 
cannot  doubt  that  your  client  will  promptly  pursue  the  same 
line  of  honorable  conduct  which  he  has  nithertq  adopted,  and 
sincerely  trust  that  a  good  understanding  in  this  matter  will 
speedily  exist  between  our  respective  clients. 

"As  you  have  intimated  a  wish  upon  the  subject,  we  beg 
to  inform  you  that  we  have  given  instructions  for  making 
out  and  delivering  our  bill  herein. 

"  We  are,  Gentlemen, 

"  Your  humble  servants, 

QUIRK,  GAMMON  &  SNAP. 
"  Messrs.  RTJNNINGTON  &  Co." 

Having  finished  writing  the  above  letter,  Gammon  sat  back 
in  his  chair,  with  folded  arms,  and  entered  upon  a  long  train 
of  thought — revolving  many  matters  which  were  worthy  of 
the  profound  consideration  they  then  received. 

When  Gammon  and  Titmouse  returned  to  town  from  York, 
they  were  fortunate  in  having  the  inside  of  the  coach  to  them- 
selves for  nearly  the  whole  of  the  way — an  opportunity  which 
Gammon  improved  to  the  utmost,  by  deepening  the  impres- 
sion he  had  already  made  in  the  mind  of  Titmouse,  01  the 
truth  of  one  great  fact — namely,  that  he  and  his  fortunes 
would  quickly  part  company,  if  Gammon  should  at  any  time 
so  will — which  never  would,  however,  come  to  pass,  so  long 
as  Titmouse  recognized  and  deferred  to  the  authority  "of 
Gammon  in  all  things.  In  vain  did  Titmouse  inquire  how 
this  could  be.  Gammon  was  impenetrable,  mysterious,  au- 
thoritative ;  and  at  length  enjoined  Titmouse  to  absolute 
secresy  concerning  the  existence  of  the  fact  in  question,  on 
pain  of  the  infliction  of  those  consequences  to  which  I  have 
already  alluded.  Gammon  assured  him  that  there  were  many 
plans  and  plots  hatching  against  him  (Titmouse) ;  but  that  it 
was  in  his  (Gammon's)  power  to  protect  him  from  them  all. 
Gammon  particularly  enjoined  him,  moreover,  to  consult  the 
feelings,  and  attend  to  the  suggestions  of  Mr.  Quirk,  where- 
in Mr.  Gammon  did  not  intimate  to  the  contrary,  and  wound 
up  all  by  telling  him,  that  as  he,  Gammon,  was  the  only  per- 
son on  earth — and  this  he  really  believed  to  be  the  case,  as 
the  reader  may  hereafter  see— who  knew  the  exact  position 
of  Titmouse,  so  he  had  devoted  himself  for  his  life  to  the  ad- 
vancing and  securing  the  interests  of  Titmouse. 

For  about  a  fortnight  after  their  return,  Titmouse,  at  Gam- 
mon's instance,  continued  at  his  former  lodgings;  but  at 
length  complained  so  earnestly  of  their  dismal  quietude,  and 
of  their  being  out  of  the  way  of  "  life"  that  Gammon  yielded 
to  his  wishes,  and,  together  with  Mr.  Quirk,  consented  to  his 
removing  to  a  central  spot— in  fact,  to  the  CABBAGE-STALK 


TEN  THOUSAND  A-YEAR.  379 

HOTEL,  Covent  Garden— a  queer  enough  name  to  be  sure ; 
Out  it  was  the  family  name  of  a  great  wholesale  green-grocer, 
who  owned  most  of  the  property  thereabouts.  It  was  not 
without  considerable  uneasiness  and  anxiety  that  Messrs. 
Quirk  and  Snap  beheld  this  change  affected,  apprehensive 
that  it  might  have  the  eit'ect  of  estranging  Titmouse  from 
them ;  but  since  Gammon  assented  to  it,  they  had  nothing 
for  it  but  to  acquiesce,  considering  Titmouse's  proximity  to 
his  splendid  independence.  They  resolved,  however,  as  far 
as  in  each  _of  them  lay,  not  to  let  themselves  be  forgotten  by 
Titmouse.  Pending  the  rule  for  the  new  trial,  Mr.  Quirk 
was  so  confident  concerning  the  issue,  that  he  greatly  in- 
creased the  allowance  of  Titmouse;  to  an  extent,  indeed, 
which  admitted  of  his  entering  into  almost  all  the  gayeties 
that  his  as  yet  scarce  initiated  heart  could  desire.  In  the  first 
place,  he  constantly  added  to  his  wardrobe.  Then  he  took 
lessons,  every  other  day,  in  "  the  noble  art  of  self-defence ; " 
which  gave  him  an  opportunity  of  forming  with  great  ease, 
at  once  an  extensive  and  brilliant  circle  of  acquaintance. 
Fencing-rooms,  wrestling-rooms,  shooting-galleries,  places 
for  pigeon-shooting,  cock-fighting,  dog-fighting,  and  billiard- 
rooms  ;  the  water  and  boat-racing — these  were  the  dazzling 
scenes  which  occupied  the  chief  portion  of  each  day.  Then, 
in  the  evenings,  there  were  theatres,  great  and  small,  the 
various  taverns,  and  other  places  of  nocturnal  resort,  which 
are  the  secret  pride  and  glory  of  the  metropolis.  In  addition 
to  this,  at  an  advanced  period  of  the  night,  or  rather  a  very 
early  hour  in  the  morning,  he  sedulously  strove  to  perfect 
himself  in  those  higher  arts  and  accomplishments,  excelled 
in  by  one  or  two  of  the  more  eminent  of  the  youthful  aris- 
tocracy, viz.  breaking  windows,  pulling  bells,  wrenching  off 
knockers,  extinguishing  lamps,  tripping  up  old  women,  watch- 
men, and  children,  and  spoiling  their  clothes ; — ah,  how  often. 
in  his  humbler  days,  had  his  heart  panted  in  noble  rivalry 
of  such  feats  as  these,  and  emulation  of  the  notoriety  they 
earned  for  the  glittering  miscreants  who  excelled  in  them  ! 
Ah,  Titmouse,  Titmouse !  Now  is  your  time  !  Made  nord 
virtute,  puer  ! 

That  he  could  long  frequent  such  scenes  as  these  without 
forming  an  extensive  and  varied  acquaintance,  would  be  a 
very  unlikely  thing  to  suppose;  and  there  was  one  who 
would  fain  have  joined  him  in  his  new  adventures— one  who, 
as  I  have  already  intimated,  had  initiated  him  in  to  the  scenes 
with  which  he  was  now  becoming  so  familiar ;  I  mean  Snap, 
who  had  been  at  once  his 

"  Guide,  philosopher,  and  friend  :" 

but  who  now  had  fewer  and  fewer  opportunities  of  associat- 
ing with  him,  inasmuch  as  his  (Snap's)  nose  was  continually 
"kept  at  the  grindstone  "  in  Saffron  Hill,  to  compensate  for 


SSO  TEN  THOUSAND  A-YEAE. 

the  lack  of  attention  to  the  business  of  the  office  of  his  senior 
partners,  owing  to  their  incessant  occupation  with  the  affairs 
of  Titmouse.  Still,  however,  he  now  and  then  contrived  to 
remind  Titmouse  of  his  (Snap's)  existence,  by  sending  him 
intimations  of  interesting  trials  at  the  Old  Bailey  and  else- 
where, and  securing  him  a  good  seat  to  view  both  the  crim- 
inal and  the  spectators— often  persons  of  the  greatest  rank, 
jfashion,  and  beauty ;  for  it  so  happens  that  in  this  country, 
Ithe  more  hideous  the  crime,  the  more  intense  the  curiosity  of 
the  upper  classes  of  both  sexes  to  witness  the  miscreant  per- 
petrator; the  more  disgusting  the  details,  the  greater  the 
avidity  with  which  they  are  listened  to  by  the  distinguished 
auditors ;— the  reason  being  plain,  that,  as  they  have  exhaust- 
ed the  pleasures  and  excitements  afforded  by  their  own 
sphere,  their  palled  and  sated  appetites  require  novel  and 
more  powerful  stimulants.  Hence,  at  length,  we  see  "  fash- 
ionables "  peopling  even  the  condemned  cell— rushing,  in 
excited  groups,  after  the  shuddering  malefactor,  staggering, 
half  palsied,  and  with  horror-laden  eye,  on  his  way  to  the 
gallows !  As  soon  as  old  Quirk  had  obtained  an  inkling  of 
Titmouse's  taste  in  these  matters,  he  afforded  Titmouse  many 
opportunities  of  gratifying  it.  Once  or  twice  the  old  gentle- 
man succeeded  even  in  enabling  Titmouse  (severe  trial,  how- 
ever, for  his  exquisite  sensibilities !)  to  shake  the  cold  and 
pinioned  hands  of  wretches  within  a  few  minutes'  time  of 
being:  led  out  for  execution  ! 

This  is  a  brief  and  general  account  of  the  way  in  which 
Titmouse  passed  his  time,  and  laid  the  groundwork  of  that 
solid,  extensive,  and  practical  acquaintance  with  men  and 
things,  which  was  requisite  to  enable  him  to  occupy  with 
dignity  and  advantage  the  splendid  station  to  which  he  was 
on  the  point  of  being  elevated. 

But  let  us  not  lose  sight  of  pur  early  and  interesting 
friends,  the  Tag-rags— a  thing  which  both  Quirk  and  Gam- 
mon resolved  should  not  happen  to  Titmouse ;  for,  on  the 
very  first  Sunday  after  his  arrival  in  town  from  York,  a 
handsome  glass  coach  might  have  been  seen,  about  two 
o'clock  in  the  afternoon,  drawing  up  opposite  to  the  gates 
of  Satin  Lodge  ;  from  which  said  coach,  the  door  having  been 
opened,  presently  descended  Messrs.  Quirk,  Gammon,  and 
Titmouse.  Now,  the  Tag-rags  always  dined  at  about  two 
o'clock  on  Sundays  ;  and,  on  tne  present  occasion,  Mr.,  Mrs., 
and  Miss  Tag-rag,  together  with  a  pretty  constant  visitor, 
the  Reverend  Dismal  Horror,  were  sitting  at  their  dinner- 
table  discussing  as  nice  a  savory  leg  of  roast  pork,  with 
apple-sauce,  as  could  at  once  have  tempted  and  satisfied  the 
most  fastidious  and  the  most  indiscriminating  appetite. 

"  Oh,  ma ! "  exclaimed  Miss  Tag-rag  faintly,  changing 
color  as  she  caught  sight,  through  the  blinds,  of  the  ap- 
proaching visitors—"  if  there  isn't  Mr.  Titmouse  !  "  and  al- 
most dropping  on  the  table  her  plate,  in  which,  with  an  ail 


TEN  THOUSAND  A- YEAR.  381 

of  tender  gallantry,  Mr.  Horror  was  in  the  act  of  depositing 
some  greens,  she  new  out  of  the  room,  darted  up-stairs,  ana 
in  a  trice  was  standing,  with  beating  heart,  before  her  glass, 
hastily  twirling  her  ringlets  round  her  trembling  fingers, 
and  making  one  or  two  slight  alterations  in  her  dress.  Her 
papa  and  mamma  started  up  at  the  same  moment,  hastily 
wiping  their  mouths  on  the  corners  of  the  table-cloth ;  and, 
after  a  hurried  apology  to  their  reverend  guest,  whom  they 
begged  "  to  go  on  eating  till  they  came  back  "—they  bounced 
into  the  drawing-room,  just  time  enough  to  appear  as  if  they 
had  been  seated  for  some  time ;  but  they  were  both  rather 
red  in  the  face,  and  flustered  in  their  manner.  Yet,  how 
abortive  was  their  attempt  to  disguise  the  disgraceful  fact 
of  their  haying  been  at  dinner  when  their  distinguished 
visitors  arrived!  For,  firstly,  the  house  was  redolent  of  the 
odors  of  roast  pork,  sage  and  onion-stuffing,  and  greens ; 
secondly,  the  red-faced  servant  girl  was  peering  round  the 
corner  of  the  kitchen  stairs,  as  if  watching  an  opportunity 
to  whip  off  a  small  dinner  tray  that  stood  between  the 
dining-room  and  drawing  room ;  and  thirdly,  they  caught  a 
glimpse  of  the  countenance  of  the  reverend  young  guest, 
who  was  holding  open  the  dining-room  door  just  wide 
enough  to  enable  him  to  see  who  passed  on  to  the  drawing- 
room ;  for,  in  truth,  the  name  which  had  escaped  from  the 
lips  of  Miss  Tag-rag,  was  one  that  always  excited  unpleasant 
feelings  in  the  breast  of  her  spiritual  friend. 

"  Ah !  Mr.  and  Mrs.  Tag-rag  !  Ton  my  soul — glad  to  see 
you — and — hope  you're  all  well?"  commenced  Titmouse, 
\vith  an  air  of  easy  confidence  and  grace.  Mr.  Gammon 
calmly  introduced  hmself  and  Mr.  Quirk. 

"  We  were  just  going  to  sit  down  to — lunch"  said  Mr. 
Tag-rag  hurriedly. 

"  You  won't  take  a  little,  will  yon,  gentlemen?"  inquired 
Mrs-  Tag-rag  faintly  ;  and  both  the  worthy  couple  felt  infinite 
relief  on  being  assured  that  their  distinguished  visitors  had 
already  lunched.  Neither  Mr.  nor  Mrs.  Tag-rag  could  take 
their  eyes  off  Mr.  Titmouse,  whose  easy  nonchalance  con- 
vinced them  that  he  must  have  been  keeping  the  society  of 
lords.  He  was  just  inquiring— as  he  ran  This  hand  through 
his  hair,  and  gently  smacked  his  slight  ebony  cane  against 
his  leg— after  Miss  Tag-rag,  when,  pale  and  agitated,  and 
holding  in  her  hand  a  pocket-handkerchief,  which  she  had 
first  suffused  with  musk  and  bergamot,  designed  to  over- 
come so  much  of  the  vulgar  odor  of  dinner  as  might  be 
lingering  about  her— that  interesting  young  lady  entered. 
Titmouse  rose  and  received  her  in  a  familiar,  forward  man- 
ner;  she  turning  white  and  red  by  turns.  She  looked  such 
a  shrivelled  little  ugly  formal  creature,  that  Titmouse  con- 
ceived quite  a  hatred  of  her,  through  recollecting  that  he  had 
once  thought  such  an  inferior  piece  of  goods  superfine.  Old 
Quirk  and  Tag-rag,  every  now  and  then,  cast  distrustful 


382  TEN  THOUSAND  A-YEAR. 

glances  at  each  other  ;  but  Gammon  kept  all  in  a  calm  flow 
of  small  talk,  which  at  length  restored  those  whom  they  had 
come  to  see,  to  something  like  self-possession.  As  for  Mr. 
Quirk,  the  more  he  looked  at  Miss  Tag-rag,  the  more  pride 
and  satisfaction  he  felt  in  reflecting  upon  the  unfavorable 
contrast  she  must  present,  in  Titmouse's  eyes,  to  Miss  Quirk. 
After  a  little  further  conversation,  principally  concerning  the 
brilliant  success  of  Titmouse,  Mr.  Quirk  came  to  the  business 
of  the  day ,  and  invited  Mr.  Mrs.,  and  Miss  Tag-rag  to  dinner 
at  Alibi  House,  on  the  ensuing  Sunday,  at  six  o'clock- 
apologizing  for  the  absence  of  Miss  Quirk,  on  the  score  of 
indisposition — she  being  at  the  time  in  the  highest  possible 
state  of  health.  Mrs.  Tag-rag  was  on  the  point  of  saying 
something  deprecatory  of  their  dining  out  on  Sunday,  as 
contrary  to  their  rule :  but  a  sudden  recollection  of  the 
earthly  interests  she  might  peril  by  so  doing,  aided  by  a 
fearfully  significant  glance  from  Mr.Tag-rag,  restrained  her. 
The  invitation  was,  therefore,  accepted  in  a  very  obsequious 
manner ;  and  soon  afterwards  their  great  visitors  took  their 
departure,  leaving  Mr.  and  Mrs.  and  Miss  Tag-rag  in  a  state 
of  considerable  excitement.  Goodness  !  could  there  be  a 
doubt  that  there  must  be  some  very  potent  attraction  at 
Satin  Lodge  to  bring  thither  Titmouse,  after  all  that  had  oc- 
curred ?  And  where  could  reside  the  point  of  that  attraction, 
but  in  Miss  Tag-rag  ? 

As  soon  as  their  visitors'  glass-coach  had  driven  off— its 
inmates  laughing  heartily  at  the  people  they  had  just  quitted 
—Mr.,  Mrs.,  and  Miss  Tag-rag  returned  to  the  dining-table, 
like  suddenly  disturbed  fowl  returning  to  their  roost,  when 
the  disturbance  had  ceased.  Profuse  were  their  apologies  to 
Mr.  Horror ;  not  aware,  however,  that  he  had  improved  the 
opportunity  afforded  by  their  absence,  to  recruit  his 
exhausted  energies  with  a  couple  of  glasses  of  port  wine 
from  a  decanter  which  stood  on  the  sideboard — a  circum- 
stance which  he  did  not  deem  important  enough  to  mention. 
Vehemently  suspecting  as  he  did,  what  was  the  state  of 
things  with  reference  to  Mr.  Titmouse  and  Miss  Tag-rag,  it 
was  somewhat  of  a  trial  of  temper  to  the  exemplary  young 
pastor,  to  have  to  listen,  for  the  remainder  of  the  afternoon, 
to  the  praises  of  Titmouse,  and  speculations  concerning  the 
immensity  of  his  fortune— matters,  indeed,  (in  his  pious 
estimation),  of  the  earth,  earthy.  In  vain  did  the  worthy 
minister  strive,  now  and  then,  to  divert  the  current  of  con- 
versation into  a  more  profitable  channel — i.  e.  towards  him- 
self ;  all  he  said  was  evidently  lost  upon  her  for  whose  ear  it 
was  intended.  She  was  in  a  reverie,  and  often  sighed.  The 
principal  figures  before  her  mind's  eye  were— TITTLEBAT 
TITMOUSE,  ESQUIRE,  and  THE  REV.  DISMAL  HORROR.  The 
latter  was  about  twenty-six,  (he  had  been  called  to  the  work 
of  the  ministry  in  his  sixteenth  year ;)  short ;  his  face  slightly 
pitted,  with  small-pox ;  his  forehead  narrow ;  his  eyes  cold 


TEN  THOUSAND  A-YEAR.  383 

and  watery ;  no  eyebrows  or  whiskers ;  high  cheek-bones ; 
his  short  dark  hair  combed  primly  forward  over  each 
temple,  and  twisted  into  a  sort  or  topknot  in  front ;  he  wore 
no  shirt-collars,  but  had  a  white  neck-handkerchief  tied 
very  formally,  and  was  dressed  in  an  ill-made  suit  of  black. 
He  spoke  in  a  drawling  canting  tone  ;  and  his  countenance 
was  overspread  with  a  demure  expression  of — CUNNING, 
trying  to  look  religions.  Then  he  was  always  talking  about 
himself,  and  the  devil,  and  his  chapel,  and  the  bottomless 
pit,  and  the  number  of  souls  which  he  had  saved,  and  the 
number  of  those  whom  he  knew  were  damned,  and  many 
more  who  certainly  would  be  damned  ;  and  other  matters  of 
that  sort,  intrusted— it  would  seem— to  his  confidential  keep- 
ing. All  this  might  be  very  well  in  its  way,  began  to  think 
Miss  Tag-rag—but  it  was  possible  to  choke  a  dog  with 
pudding.  Poor  girl,  can  you  wonder  at  her  dwell- 
ing fondly  upon  the  image  of  Titmouse  ?  So  splen- 
didly dressed  —  so  handsome — such  a  fashionable  air — 
and  with  —  ten  thousand  a-year  ?  When  she  put  all 
these  things  together,  it  almost  looked  like  a  dream  ;  such 
good  fortune  could  never  be  in  store  for  a  poor  simple  girl 
like  herself.  Yet  there  was  such  a  thing  as— love  at  first 
sight !  After  tea  they  all  walked  down  to  Mr.  Horror's  meet- 
ing-house. It  was  very  crowded  ;  and  it  was  remarked  that 
the  eloquent  young  preacher  had  never  delivered  a  more  im- 
passioned sermon  from  that  pulpit :  it  was  sublime.  Oh, 
how  bitterly  he  denounced  "  worldly-mindedness  !  "  What 
a  vivid  picture  he  drew  of  the  flourishing  green  bay-tree  of 
the  wicked,  suddenly  blasted  in  the  moment  of  its  pride  and 
strength ;  while  the  righteous  should  shine  like  stars  in  the 
firmament  forever  and  ever !  Who  cannot  see  here  shadowed 
out  the  characters  of  Titmouse  and  of  Horror  respectively  ? 
— who  hesitate  between  the  two  ?  And  when  at  length,  the 
sermon  over,  he  sat  down  in  his  pulpit,  (the  congregation 
also  sitting  and  singing,  which  had  a  somewhat  queer  effect,) 
and  drew  gracefully  across  his  damp  forehead  his  white 
pocket-handkerchief,  which  had  been  given  him  by  Miss 
Tag-rag ;  and  looked  with  an  air  of  most  interesting  languor 
and  exhaustion  towards  Mr.  Tag-rag's  pew,  where  sat  that 
young  lamb  of  his  flock — Miss  Tag-rag — her  father  the 
wealthiest  man  in  the  congregation,  and  she  his  only  child 
— he  felt  a  most  lively  and  tender  interest  in  her  welfare — 
her  spiritual  welfare,  and  resolved  to  call  the  next  morning ; 
entertaining  an  humble  hope  of  finding  that  his  zealous 
labors  had  not  been  in  vain !  Was  one  fruit  of  them  to  have 
been  looked  for  in  the  benignant  temper  which  Tag-rag,  to 
the  amazement  of  his  shopmen,  evinced  the  next  morning, 
for  at  least  an  hour  ?  Would  that  the  like  good  effects  had 
been  visible  in  Mrs.  and  Miss  Tag-rag ;  but— alas  that  I 
should  have  to  record  it !— it  was  so  far  otherwise,  that  they 
laid  aoide  some  fancy-fair  work  on  which  Mr,  Horror  had, 


384  TEN  THOUSAND  A-YEAR. 

set  them — for  the  whole  week,  which  they  devoted  to  the 
preparation  of  those  dresses  with  which  they  purposed  the 
profanation  of  the  ensuing:  Sunday. 

That  day  at  length  arrived,  and  precisely  at  six  o'clock  a 
genteel  fly  deposited  the  visitants  from  Satin  Lodge  at  the 
splendid  entrance  to  Alibi  House.  There  was  the  big  foot- 
man—shoulder-knot, red  breeches,  and  all.  Tag-rag  felt  a 
little  nervous.  Before  they  had  entered  the  gates,  the  fond ' 
proud  parents  had  kissed  their  trembling  daughter,  and  en- 
treated her  "  to  keep  her  spirits  up ! "  The  exhortation  was 
needful ;  for  when  she  saw  the  sort  of  style  that  awaited 
them,  she  became  not  a  little  agitated.  When  she  entered 
the  hall — ah !  on  a  chair  lay  a  glossy  new  hat,  and  a  delicate 
ebony  walking-stick  ;  so  he  had  come— was  then  up-stairs  !— 
Miss  Tag-rag  trembled  in  every  limb. 

"  I  don't  know,  my  dear,"  whispered  Mrs.  Tag-rag  to  her 
husband,  with  a  subdued  sigh,  as  they  followed  the  splendid 
footman  up-stairs, — "  It  may  be  all  uncommon  grand  ;  but 
somehow  I  in  afraid  we're  doing  wrong— It's  the  Lord's  Day 
—see  if  any  good  comes  of  it." 

"  Tut— hold  your  tongue  !  Let's  have  no  nonsense,"  sternly 
whispered  Mr.  Tag-rag  to  his  submissive  wife. 

"  Your  name,  sir  ?  "  quoth  the  footman,  in  a  gentlemanly 
way. 

"  Mr.,  Mrs.,  and  Miss  Tag-rag,"  replied  Mr.  Tag-rag,  after 
clearing  his  throat ;  and  so  they  were  announced,  Miss  Quirk 
coming  forward  to  receive  the  ladies  with  the  most  charm- 
ing affability.  There  stood  Titmouse,  iif  an  easy  attitude 
with  his  hands  stuck  into  his  coat  pockets,  and  resting  on 
his  hips,  in  a  very  delicate  and  elegant  fashion.  How  com- 
pletely he  seemed  at  his  ease ! 

"Oh  Lord!  "  thought  Tag-rag,  "that's  the  young  fellow  I 
used  to  go  on  so  to ! 

In  due  time  dinner  was  announced  ;  and  who  can  describe 
the  rapture  that  thrilled  through  the  bosoms  of  the  three  Tag- 
rags,  when  Mr.  Quirk  requested  Mr.  Titmouse  to  take  down — 
Miss  Tag-rag ! !  Her  father  took  down  Mrs.  Alias ;  Mr.  Quirk, 
Mrs.Tag-rag  and;  Gammon,  Miss  Quirk.  She  really  might  have 
been  proud  of  her  partner.  Gammon  was  about  thirty-six  years 
old ;  above  the  average  height ;  with  a  particularly  gentle- 
manly appearance  and  address,  and  an  intellectual  and  even 
handsome  countenance,  though  occasionally  it  wore,  to  a 
keen  observer,  a  sinister  expression.  He  wore  a  blue  coat,  a 
plain  white  waistcoat,  (not  disfigured  by  any  glistening  fid- 
dle faddleof  pins,  chains,  or  quizzing-glasses,)  black  trousers, 
and  silk  stockings.  There  was  at  once  an  appearance  of  neat- 
ness and  carelessness;  and  there  was  such  a  ready  smile— such 
bland  ease  and  self-possession  about  him— as  communicated 
itself  to  those  whom  he  addressed.  I  hardly  know,  Mr. 
Gammon,  why  I  have  thus  noticed  so  particularly  your  out- 
Ward  appearance ;  It  certainly,  on  the  occasion  I  am  describ. 


TEN  THOUSAND  A-YEAR.  385 

Ing,  struck  me  much ;  but  there  are  such  things  as  whited 
walls  and  painted  sepulchres.  Dinner  went  off  very  pleasantly, 
the  wines  soon  communicating  a  little  confidence  to  the 
flustered  guests.  Mrs.  Tag-rag  had  drunk  so  much  cham- 
pagne—an unusual  beverage  for  her— that  almost  as  soon  as 
she  had  returned  to  the  drawing-room,  she  sat  down  on  the 
sofa  and  fell  asleep,  leaving  the  two  young  ladies  to  amuse 
each  other  as  best  they  might ;  for  Mrs.  Alias  was  very  deaf, 
and  moreover  very  stiff  and  distant,  and  sat  looking  at  them 
in  silence.  To  return  to  the  dining-room  for  a  moment. 
'Twas  quite  delightful  to  see  the  sort  of  friendship  that 
seemed  to  grow  up  between  QuirK  and  Tag-rag,  as  their 
heads  got  filled  with  wine :  at  the  same  time  each  of  them 
drawing  closer  and  closer  to  Titmouse,  who  sat  between 
them— volubility  itself.  They  soon  dropped  all  disguise — 
each  plainly  under  the  impression  that  the  other  could  not, 
or  did  not,  observe  him ;  and  at  length,  impelled  by  their 
overmastering  motives,  they  became  so  bare-faced  in  their 
sycophancy — evidently  forgetting  that  Gammon  was  present 
— that  he  could  several  times,  with  only  the  utmost  difficulty, 
refrain  from  bursting  into  laughter  at  the  earnest  devotion 
with  which  these  two  worshippers  of  the  little  golden  calf 
strove  to  attract  the  attention  of  their  divinity,  and  recom- 
mend themselves  to  its  favor. 

At  length  the  four  gentlemen  repaired  to  the  drawing- 
room,  whence  issued  the  sounds  of  music  ;  and  on  entering 
they  beheld  the  two  lovely  performers  seated  at  the  piano, 
engaged  upon  a  duet.  The  plump  flaxen-haired  Miss  Quirk, 
in  her  flowing  white  muslin  dress,  her  thick  gold  chain  and 
massive  bracelets,  formed  rather  a  strong  contrast  to  her 
sallow  skinny  little  companion,  in  a  span-new  slate-colored 
silk  dress,  with  staring  scarlet  sash;  her  long  corkscrew 
ringlets  glistening  in  bear's  grease :  and  as  for  their  perform- 
ance, Miss  Quirk  played  boldly  and  well  through  her  part,  a 
smile  of  contempt  now  and  then  beaming  over  her  counte- 
nance at  the  ridiculous  incapacity  of  her  companion.  As  soon 
as  the  gentlemen  made  their  appearance  the  ladies  ceased, 
and  withdrew  from  the  piano :  Miss  Tag-rag,  with  a  sweet 
air  of  simplicity  and  conscious  embarrassment,  gliding  to- 
wards the  sofa,  where  sat  her  mamma  asleep,  but  whom  she 
at  once  awoke.  Mr.  Quirk  exclaimed,  as,  evidently  elevated 
with  wine,  he  slapped  his  daughter  on  her  fat  back,  "  Ah, 
Dora,  my  dove  !  "  while  Tag-rag  kissed  his  daughter's  cheek, 
and  squeezed  her  hand,  and  then  glanced  with  a  proud  and 
delighted  air  at  Titmouse,  who  was  lolling  at  full  length 
upon  the  other  sofa,  picking  his  teeth.  While  Miss  Quirk 
was  making  tea,  Gammon  gayly  conversing  with  her,  and  in 
an  undertone  satirizing  Miss  Tag-rag;  the  latter  young 
lady  was  gazing,  with  a  timid  air,  at  the  various  elegant  nick- 
nacks  scattered  upon  the  tables  and  slabs.  One  of  these  con- 
sisted of  a  pretty  little  box,  about  a  foot  square,  with  a  glass 


886  TEN  THOUSAND  A-TEAtt. 

lid,  through  which  she  saw  the  contents ;  and  they  not  a  lit 
tie  surprised  her.  They  were  pieces  of  cord  ;  and  on  looking 
at  one  of  the  sides  of  the  box,  she  read,  with  a  sudden  shud- 
der,—" With  these  cords  were  tied  the  hands  of  Arthur  Griz- 
zlegut,  executed  of  high  treason,\st  May,  18 — .  Presented^as  a 
mark  of  respect,  to  Caleb  Quirk,  Esq.,  by  John  Ketch"  Poor 
Miss  Tag-rag  recoiled  from  the  box  as  if  she  had  seen  it  filled 
with  writhing  adders.  She  took  an  early  opportunity,  how- 
ever, of  calling  her  father's  attention  to  it;  and  he  pro- 
nounced it  a  "  most  interesting  object,"  and  fetched  Mrs. 
Tag-rag  to  see  it.  She  agreed  first  with  her  daughter  and 
then  with  her  husband.  Quietly  pushing  her  investigations, 
Miss  Tag-rag  by-and-by  beheld  a  large  and  splendidly  bound 
volume — in  fact,  Miss  Quirk's  album ;  and,  after  turning 
over  most  of  the  leaves,  and  glancing  over  the  "  poetical 
effusions  "  and  u  prose  sentiments  "  which  few  fools  can  ab- 
stain from  depositing  upon  the  embossed  pages,  when  solic- 
ited by  the  lovely  proprietresses  of  such  works,  behold— 
her  heart  fluttered — poor  Miss  Tag-rag  almost  dropped  the 
magnificent  volume ;  for  there  was  the  idolized  name  of  Mr. 
Titmouse— no  doubt  his  own  handwriting  and  composition. 
She  read  it  over  eagerly  again  and  again,— 

"  Tittlebat  Titmouse  Is  My  name, 

England  is  My  Nation. 
London  Is  My  dwelling-Place, 
And  Christ  Is  My  Salvation." 

It  was  very— very  beautiful— beautiful  in  its  simplicity !  She 
looked  anxiously  about  for  writing  implements!  but  not 
seeing  any,  was  at  length  obliged  to  trust  to  her  memory  : 
on  which,  indeed,  the  exquisite  composition  was  already  in- 
scribed in  indelible  characters.  Miss  Quirk,  who  was  watch- 
ing her  motions,  guessed  the  true  cause  of  her  excitement ; 
and  a  smile  of  mingled  scorn  and  pity  for  her  infatuated 
delusion  shone  upon  her  face  :  in  which,  however,  there  ap- 
peared a  little  anxiety  when  she  beheld  Titmouse— not,  how- 
ever, perceiving  that  he  did  so  in  consequence  of  a  motion 
from  Gammon,  whose  eye  governed  his  movements  as  a 
man's  those  of  his  spaniel — walk  up  to  her,  and  converse 
with  a  great  appearance  of  interest.  At  length  Mr.  Tag-rag's 
"  carriage "  was  announced.  Mr.  Quirk  gave  his  arm  to 
Mrs.  Tag-rag,  and  Mr.  Titmouse  to  the  daughter ;  who  en- 
deavored, as  she  went  down  the  stairs,  to  direct  melting 
glances  at  her  handsome  and  distinguished  companion.  They 
evidently  told,  for  she  could  not  be  mistaken ;  he  certainly 
once  or  twice  squeezed  her  arm— and  the  last  fond  words  he 
uttered  to  her  were  "  'Pon  my  soul— it's  early :  devilish 
sorry  you're  going !  "  As  the  Tag-rags  drove  home,  they  were 
all  loud  in  the  praises  of  those  whom  they  had  just  quitted, 
particularly  of  those  whose  splendid  hospitality  they  had  been 


TEN  THOUSANi)  A-YEAlt.  387 

enjoying.  With  a  daughter,  with  whom  Mr.  Quirk  must 
naturally  have  wished  to  make  so  splendid  a  match  as  that 
with  Titmouse — but  who  was  plainly  engaged  to  Mr.  Gam- 
mon—how kind  and  disinterested  was  Mr.  Quirk,  in  afford- 
ing every  encouragement  in  his  power  to  the  passion  which 
Titmouse  had  so  manifestly  conceived  for  Miss  Tag-rag !  And 
was  there  ever  so  delightful  a  person  as  Gammon  ?  How 
cordially  he  had  shaken  the  hands  of  each  of  them  at  parting  ! 
As  for  Miss  Tag-rag,  she  almost  felt  that,  if  her  heart  had 
not  been  so  deeply  engaged  to  Titmouse,  she  could  have 
loved  Mr.  Gammon ! 

"  I  hope,  Tabby,"  said  Mrs.  Tag-rag,  "  that  when  you're 
Mrs.  Titmouse,  you'll  bring  your  dear  husband  to  hear  Mr. 
Horror  ?  You  know,  we  ought  to  be  grateful  to  the  Lord— 
for  He  has  done  it." 

"  La,  ma,  how  can  I  tell  ?  "  quoth  Miss  Tag-rag  petulantly. 
*'  I  must  go  where  Mr.  Titmouse  chooses,  of  course  ;  and  no 
doubt  he'll  take  sittings  in  one  of  the  West  End  churches : 
you  know,  yon  go  where  pa  goes— I  go  where  Titmouse  goes ! 
±>ut  I  ic  ill  come  sometimes,  too— if  it's  only  to  show  that  I'm 
not  above  it,  you  know.  La,  what  a  stir  there  will  be  !  The 
three  Miss  Knipps— I  do  so  hope  they'll  be  there  !  I'll  have 
your  pew,  ma,  lined  with  red  velvet ;  it  will  look  so  genteel." 

"  I'm  not  quite  so  sure,  Tabby,  though,"  interrupted  her 
father  with  a  certain  swell  of  manner,  "  that  we  shall,  after 
a  certain  event,  continue  to  live  in  these  parts.  There's  such 
a  thing  as  retiring  from  business,  Tabby ;  besides,  we  shall 
nat'rally  wish  to  be  near  you." 

"  He's  a  love  of  a  man,  pa,  isn't  he?"  interrupted  Miss  Tag- 
rag  with  irrepressible  excitement.  Her  father  folded  her  in 
his  arms.  They  could  hardly  believe  that  they  had  reached 
Satin  Lodge.  That  respectable  structure,  somehow  or  other, 
now  looked  to  the  eyes  of  all  of  them  shrunk  into  most  con- 
temptible dimensions.  What  was  it  to  the  spacious  and  splen- 
did residence  which  they  had  quitted  ?  And  what,  in  all  pro- 
bability, could  that  be  to  the  mansion— or  perhaps  several 
mansions— to  which  Mr.  Titmouse  would  be  presently  en- 
titled, and— in  his  right—  some  one  else  ? 


CHAPTER  XVII. 

WHILST  the  brilliant  success  of  Tittlebat  Titmouse  was 
exciting  so  great  a  sensation  amongst  the  inmates  of  Satin 
Lodge  and  Alibi  House,  there  were  also  certain  quarters  in 
the  upper  regions  of  society,  in  which  it  produced  a  considera- 
ble commotion,  and  where  it  Avas  contemplated  with  feelings 
of  intense  interest ;  nor  without  reason.  For  mdeed  to  you, 


£88  TEN  THOUSAND  A-TEAR. 

reflective  reader,  much  pondering  men  and  manners,  and 
observing  the  influence  ot  great  wealth,  especially  suddenly 
and  unexpectedly  acquired,  upon  all  classes  of  mankind — it 
would  appear  passing  strange  that  so  prodigious  an  event  as 
that  of  an  accession  to  a  fortune  of  ten  thousand  a-year,  and 
a  large  accumulation  of  money  besides,  could  be  looked  on 
with  indifference  in  those  regions  were  MONEY 

"  Is  like  the  air  they  breathe — if  they  have  it  not  they  die;  " 

in  whose  absence,  all  their  "  honor,  love,  obedience,  troops  of 
friends,"  disappear  like  snow  under  sunshine ;  the  edifice  of 
pomp,  luxury,  and  magnificence  that  "  rose  like  an  exhala- 
tion, so  disappears — 

"  And,  like  an  unsubstantial  pageant  faded, 
Leaves  not  rack  behind." 

Take  away  money,  and  that  which  raised  its  delicate  and 
pampered  possessors  above  the  common  condition  of  man- 
kind— that  of  privation  and  incessant  labor  and  anxiety — into 
one  entirely  artificial,  engendering  totally  new  wants  and 
desires,  is  gone,  all  gone  ;  and  its  occupants  suddenly  fall,  as 
it  were,  through  a  highly  rarefied  atmosphere,  breathless 
and  dismayed,  into  contact  with  the  chilling  exigencies  of  life, 
of  which  till  then  they  had  only  heard  and  read,  sometimes 
with  a  kind  of  morbid  sympathy,  as  we  hear  and  read  of  a  for- 
eign country,  not  stirring  the  while  from  our  snug  homes,  by 
whose  comfortable  and  luxurious  firesides  we  read  of  the 
frightful  palsying  cold  of  the  polar  regions,  and  for  a  moment 
sigh  over  and  shudder  at  the  condition  of  their  miserable  in- 
habitants, as  vividly  pictured  to  us  by  adventurous  travellers. 
If  the  reader  had  reverently  cast  his  eye  over  the  pages  of 
that  glittering  centre  of  aristocratic  literature,  and  inexhausti- 
ble solace  against  the  ennui  of  a  wet  day — I  mean  Debrettfs 
Peerage,  his  attention  could  not  have  failed  to  be  riveted, 
amongst  a  galaxy  of  brilliant  but  minor  stars,  by  the  radiance 
of  one  transcendant  constellation. 

Behold;  hush;  tremble! 

"AUGUSTUS  MORTIMER  PLANT AGENET  FiTz-TlRSE  EARL  OF 
DREDDLINGTON,  VISCOUNT  FITZ-URSE,  AND  BARON  DRELIN- 
COURT  ;  KNIGHT  OF  THE  GOLDEN  FLEECE  ;  G.C.B.,  D.C.L., 
F.C.S.,  F.P.S.,  etc.,  etc.,  etc.;  Lieutenant-General  in  the  army, 
Colonel  of  the  37th  regiment  of  light  dragoons ;  Lord  Lieu- 
tenant of shire  ;  elder  brother  of  the  Trinity  House ;  for- 
merly Lord  Ste  ward  of  the  Household ;  born  the  31st  March, 
17 — ;  succeeded  his  father,  PERCY  CONSTANTINE  FITZ-URSE, 
as  fifth  Earl,  and  twentieth  in  the  Barony,  January  10th,  17 — ; 
married,  April  1, 17—,  the  Right  Hon.  Lady  Philippa  Emme- 


TEN  THOUSAND  A-TEAE.  389 

line  Blanche  Macspleuchan,  daughter  of  Archibald,  ninth 
Duke  of  Tantallon,  K.T.,  and  has  issue  an  only  child, 

"  CECILIA  PHILIPPA  LEOPOLDINA  PLANTAGENET,  born  June 
10, 17—. 

''  Town  residence,  Grosvenor  Square. 

"  Seats,  Gruneaghoolaghan  Castle,  Galway ;  Tre-ardevora- 
veor  Manor,  Cornwall ;  Llmryllwcrwpllglly  Abbey,  N. 
Wales;  Tullyclachanach  Palace,  N.  Britain;  Poppleton 
Hall,  Hertfordshire. 

"Earldom,  by  patent,  1667; Barony,  by  writ  of  sum- 
mons, 12th  Hen.  II." 

Now,  as  to  the  above  tremendous  list  of  seats  and  residen- 
ces, be  it  observed  that  the  existence  of  two  of  them,  viz. 
Grosvenor  Square  and  Poppleton  Hall  was  tolerably  well  as- 
certained by  the  residence  of  the  august  proprietor  of  them, 
and  the  expenditure  therein  of  his  princely  revenue  of  JE5000 
a-year.  The  existence  of  the  remaining  ones,  however,  the 
names  of  which  the  diligent  chronicler  has  preserved  with 
such  scrupulous  accuracy,  had  become  somewhat  problem- 
atical since  the  era  of  the  civil  wars,  and  the  physical  de- 
rangement of  the  surface  of  the  earth  in  those  parts,  which 
one  may  conceive  to  have  taken  place*  consequent  upon 
those  events ;  those  imposing  feudal  residences  having  been 
originally  erected  in  positions  so  carefully  selected  with  a 
view  to  their  security  against  aggression,  as  to  have  become 
totally  inaccessible — and  indeed  unknown,  to  the  present  in- 
glorious and  degenerate  race,  no  longer  animated  by  the 
spirit  of  chivalry  and  adventure. 

[I  have  now  recovered  my  breath,  after  my  bold  flight  into 
the  resplendent  regions  of  aristocracy ;  but  my  eyes  are  still 
dazzled.] 

The  reader  may  by  this  time  have  got  an  intimation  that 
Tittlebat  Titmouse,  in  a  madder  freak  of  fortune  than  any 
which  her  incomprehensible  ladyship  hath  hitherto  exhibit- 
ed in  the  pages  of  this  history,  is  far^on  his  way  towards  a 
dizzy  pitch  of  greatness— viz.  that  he  has  now,  owing  to  the 
verdict  of  the  Yorkshire  jury,  taken  the  place  of  Mr.  Aubrey, 
and  become  heir-expectant  to  the  oldest  barony  in  the  king- 
dom—between it  and  him  only  one  old  peer,  and  his  sole 
child,  an  unmarried  daughter,  intervening.  Behold  the 
thing  demonstrated  to  your  very  eye,  in  the  Pedigree  on  the 
next  page,  which  is  only  our  former  onef  a  little  extended. 

From  this  I  think  it  will  appear,  that  on  the  death  of 
Augustus,  fifth  earl  and  twentieth  baron,  with  no  other 
issue  than  Lady  Cecilia,  the  earldom  being  then  extinct,  the 
barony  would  descend  upon  the  Lady  Cecilia ;  and  that,  in 
the  event  of  her  dying  without  issue  m  the  lifetime  of  her 

*  See  Dr.  Bubble's  "Account  of  the  late  Landslips,  and  of  the  remains 
of  Subterranean  Castles."— Quarto  edition,  pp.  2000-2008. 
t  Ante,  p.  207,! 


390  TEN  THOUSAND  A-YEAE. 

father,  Tittlebat  Titmouse  would,  on  the  earl's  death  with- 
out  other  lawful  issue,  become  LORD  DRELINGCOURT,  twenty- 
first  in  the  barony ;  and  in  the  event  of  her  dying  without 
issue,  after  her  father's  death,  TITTLEBAT  TITMOUSE  would 
become  the  twenty-second  LORD  DRELINGCOURT  ;  one  or 
other  of  which  two  splendid  positions,  but  for  the  enterpris- 
ing agency  of  Messrs.  Quirk,  Gammon,  and  Snap,  would 
have  been  occupied  by  CHARLES  AUBREY,  ESQ. — on  consider- 
ing all  which,  one  cannot  but  remember  a  saying  of  an  an- 
cient poet,  who  seems  to  have  kept  as  keen  an  eye  upon  the 
unaccountable  frolics  of  the  goddess  Fortune,  as  this  nistory 
shows  that  I  have.  Tis  a  passage  which  any  little  school- 
boy will  translate  to  his  mother  or  his  sisters— 

"  Hinc  apicem  rapax 

Fortuna  cum  stridore  acuto 
Sustulit,  Lie  posuisse  gaudet."* 

At  the  time  of  which  I  am  writing,  the  Earl  of  Dreddling- 
ton  was  about  sixty-seven  years  old ;  and  he  would  have 
realized  the  idea  of  an  incarnation  of  the  sublimest  PRIDE. 
He  was  of  rather  a  slight  make,  and,  though  of  a  tolerably  ad- 
vanced age,  stood  as  straight  as  an  arrow.  His  hair  was 
glossy  and  white  as  snow ;  his  features  were  of  an  aristocrat- 
ic cast ;  their  expression  was  severe  and  haughty ;  and  I  am 
compelled  to  say  that  there  was  scarce  a  trace  of  intellect 
perceptible  in  them.  His  manner  and  demeanor  were  cold, 
imperturbable,  inaccessible ;  wherever  he  went— so  to  speak— 
he  radiated  cold.  Comparative  poverty  embittered  his  spirit, 
as  his  lofty  birth  and  ancient  descent  generated  the  pride  I 
have  spoken  of.  With  what  calm  and  supreme  self-satisfaction 
did  he  look  down  upon  all  lower  in  the  peerage  than  himself ! 
and  as  for  a  newly-created  peer,  he  looked  at  such  a  being 
with  ineffable  disdain.  Amongst  his  few  equals  he  was 
affable  enough;  amongst  his  inferiors  he  exhibited  an  insup- 
portable appearance  of  condescension— one  which  excited  a 
wise  man's  smile  of  pity  and  contempt,  and  a  fool's  anger- 
both,  however,  equally  naught  to  the  Earl  of  Dreddlington. 
If  anyone  could  have  ventured  upon  &post  mortem  examina- 
tion of  so  august  a  structure  as  the  Earl's  carcass,  his  heart 
would  probably  have  been  found  to  be  of  the  size  of  a  pea,  and 
his  brain  very  soft  and  flabby ;  both,  however,  equal  to  the 
small  occasions  which,  from  time  to  time,  called  for  the  ex- 
ercise of  their  functions.  The  former  was  occupied  almost  ex. 
clusively  by  two  feelings— love  of  himself  and.  of  his  daugh> 
ter,  (because  upon  her  would  descend  his  barony ; )  the  latter 
exhibited  its  powers  (supposing  the  brain  to  be  the  seat  of 
the  mind)  in  mastering  the  military  details  requisite  for 
nominal  soldiership ;  the  game  of  whist;  the  routine  of  petty 

*Hor.  Carm.  1.  34,  adftnem. 


TEN  THOUSAND  A-YEAE. 

a 


o  o> 


391 


~£ci 

o  «-" 
*-l  ^ 
o3  " 

—  P 

ST-H 

O    *> 

•d 

«3 
<U 

O  v^ 

a 

^3  c?                -S"^ 

T^ 

£*    |^ 

o 
o 

^3.5                »*  » 

cs 

'o;  ^ 

5*. 

CO 

0) 

>d 

S  f~—  '                i.^  *^ 

nj  r^j                    K-,   ^ 
<U^ 

-sg        ^g 

r*i    M                            O  ^^ 

O 

Geoffrey  de 

iiunmoned  as  Baror 

i 

.§ 

a 

o 
c 

iry  Dreddlington?  si 
created  Earl  ot  D 
1 

srcy  Dreddlington,  . 
younger  brother  of 

I 

to 

.s 
« 

QQ 


B 


^43 


^J 

S1^ 
Sc^ 

O 


CS  ~ 
"§ 

w  M 


!.^l  P 


g 


eddl 
othe 


ba 


Gabr 


0        0 

S     § 
-- 


O     H 


PM 


03 
B 


95  "d 


fH     — 

03 


d 
o 

If 


m 


392  TEN  THOUSAND  A-YEAR. 

business  in  the  Ho.use  of  Lords ;  and  the  etiquette  of  the  court. 
One  branch  of  useful  knowledge  by  the  way  he  had,  however, 
completely  mastered— that  Avlnch  is  so  ably  condensed  in  De- 
brett  /  and  he  became  a  sort  of  oracle  in  such  matters.    As 
for  his  politics,  he  professed  Whig  principles— and  was,  in- 
deed, a  bitter,  though  quiet  partisan.    In  attendance  to  his 
senatorial  duties,  he  practised  an  exemplary  punctuality ; 
was  always  to  be  found  in  the  House  at  its  sitting  and  rising ; 
and  never  once,  on  any  occasion  great  or  small,  voted  against 
his  party.  He  had  never  been  heard  to  speak  in  a  full  House; 
first,  because  he  never  could  muster  nerve  enough  for  the 
purpose;  secondly,  because  he  never  had  anything  to  say  ; 
and  lastly,  lest  he  should  compromise  his  dignity,  and  destroy 
the  prestige  of  his  position,  by  not  speaking  better  than  any 
one  present.    His  services  were  not,  however,  entirely  over- 
looked ;  for,  on  his  party  coming  into  office  for  a  few  weeks, 
(they  knew  it  could  be  for  no  longer  a  time,)  they  made  him 
Lord  Steward  of  the  Household  ;  which  was  thenceforward 
an  epoch  to  which  he  referred  every  event  of  his  life,  great 
and  small.    The  great  object  of  his  ambition  ever  since  he 
had  been  of  an  age  to  form  large  and  comprehensive  views  of 
action  and   conduct,    to    conceive  superior  designs,  and  to 
achieve  distinction  amongst  mankind— was,  to  obtain  a  step 
in  the  peerage ;  for  considering  the  antiquity  of  his  family, 
and  his  ample,  nay  superfluous  pecuniary  means— so  much 
more  than  adequate  to  support  his  present  double  dignity  of 
earl  and  baron— he  thought  it  but  a  reasonable  return  for 
his  eminent  political  services  to  obtain  the  step  which  he 
coveted.    But  his  anxiety  on  this  point  had  been  recently  in- 
creased a  thousand-fold  by  one  circumstance.    A  gentleman 
who  held  an  honorable  and  lucrative  official  situation  in  the 
House,  and  who  never  had  treated  the  Earl  of  Dreddlington 
with  that  profound  obsequiousness  which  the  Earl  conceived 
to  be  his  due— but,  on  the  contrary,  had  presumed  to  consid- 
er himself  a  man  and  an  Englishman  equally  with  the  Earl 
— had,  a  short  time  before,  succeeded  in  establishing  his  title 
to  an  earldom  that  had  long  been  dormant,  and  was  of  crea- 
tion earlier  than  that  of  Dreddlington.    The  Earl  of  Dred- 
dlington took  this  untoward  circumstance  so  much  to  heart, 
that  for  some  months  afterwards  he  appeared  to  be  in  a  de- 
cline ;  always  experiencing  a  dreadful  inward  spasm  when- 
ever the  Earl  of  Fitzwalter  made  his  appearance  in  the 
House.    For  this  sad  state  of  things  there  was  plainly  but 
one  remedy— a  MARQUISATE— at  which  the  Earl  gazed  with 
the  wistful  eye  of  an  old  and  feeble  ape  at  a  cocoanut,  just 
above  his  reach,  and  which  he  beholds  at  length  grasped  and 
carried  off  by  some  nimbler  and  younger  rival. 

Amongst  all  the  weighty  cares  and  anxieties  of  this  life,  I 
must  do  the  Earl  the  justice  to  say,  that  he  did  not  neglect 
the  concerns  of  hereafter— the  solemn  realities  of  that  future 
revealed  to  us  in  the  Scriptures.  To  his  enlightened  and 


TEN  THOUSAND  A-YEAR.  393 

comprehensive  view  of  the  state  of  things  around  him,  it  was 
evident  that  the  Author  of  the  world  had  decreed  the  exist- 
ence of  regular  gradations  of  society.  The  following  lines, 
(Rioted  one  night  in  the  House  by  the  leader  of  his  party,  haa 
infinitely  delighted  the  Earl— 

"  Oh,  where  DEGREE  is  shaken, 
Which  is  the  ladder  to  all  high  designs, 
The  enterprise  is  sick! 

Take  but  DEGREE  away — untune  that  string, 
And,  hark!  what  discord  follows!  each  thing  meets 
In  mere  oppugnancy! "  * 

When  the  Earl  discovered  that  this  was  the  production  of 
Shakespeare  he  conceived  a  great  respect  for  that  writer,  and 
purchased  a  copy  of  his  works,  and  had  them  splendidly 
bound — never  to  be  opened,  however,  except  at  that  one  place 
where  the  famous  passage  in  question  was  to  be  found.  How 
great  was  the  honor  thus  conferred  upon  the  plebeian  poet 
to  stand  amidst  a  collection  of  royal  and  noble  authors,  to 
whose  productions,  and  those  in  elucidation  and  praise  of 
them,  the  Earl's  splendid  looking  library  had  till  then  been 
confined !  Since,  thought  the  Earl,  such  is  clearly  the  order 
of  Providence  in  this  world,  Avhy  should  it  not  be  so  in  the 
next?  He  felt  certain  that  then  there  would  be  found 
corresponding  differences  and  degrees  in  analogy  to  dif- 
ferences and  degrees  existing  upon  earth;  and  with 
this  view  had  read  and  endeavored  to  comprehend  a  very 
dry  but  learned  book — Butler's  Analogy — lent  him  by  a  de- 
ceased kinsman — a  bishop.  This  consolatory  conclusion  of 
the  Earl's  was  greatly  strengthened  by  a  passage  of  Scrip- 
ture, from  which  he  had  once  heard  the  aforesaid  bishop 
preach — " In  my  Father's  house  are  MANY  MANSIONS;  if  it 
had  not  been  so,  I  would  have  told  you"  On  grounds  such 
as  these,  after  much  conversation  with  several  old  brother 
peers  of  his  own  rank,  he  and  they — those  wise  and  good  men 
— came  to  the  conclusion  that  there  was  no  real  ground  for 
apprehending  so  grievous  a  misfortune  as  the  huddling  to- 
gether hereafter  of  the  great  and  small  into  one  miscella- 
neous and  ill-assorted  assemblage  ;  but  that  the  rules  of  pre- 
cedence, in  all  their  strictness,  as  being  founded  in  the 
nature  of  things,  would  meet  with  an  exact  observance,  so 
that  every  one  should  be  ultimately  and  eternally  happy  in 
the  company  of  his  equals.  The  Earl  of  Dreddlington  would 
have,  in  fact,  as  soon  supposed,  with  the  deluded  Indian, 
that  in  his  voyage  to  the  next  world — 

"  His  faithful  dog  should  bear  him  company  ;  " 

as  that  his  lordship  should  be  doomed  to  participate  the  same 
*  Troilus  and  Cressida,  I.  iii. 


S94  TEN  THOUSAND  A-YEAtt. 

regions  of  heaven  with  any  of  his  domestics  :  unless,  indeed, 
by  some,  in  his  view,  not  improbable  dispensation,  it  should 
form  an  ingredient  in  their  cup  of  happiness  in  the  next  world, 
there  to  perform  those  offices — or  analogous  ones — for  their 
old  masters,  which  they  had  performed  upon  earth.  As  the 
Earl  grew  older,  these  just,  and  rational,  and  Scriptural 
views,  became  clearer  and  his  faith  firmer.  Indeed,  it  might 
be  said  that  he  was  in  a  manner  ripening  for  immortality — 
for  which  his  noble  and  lofty  nature,  he  felt,  was  fitter,  and 
more  likely  to  be  in  its  element,  than  it  could  possibly  be  in 
this  dull,  degraded  and  C9nfused  world.  He  knew  that  there 
his  sufferings  in  this  inferior  stage  of  existence  would 
be  richly  recompensed  ;  for  sufferings  indeed  he  had,  though 
secret,  arising  from  the  scanty  means  which  had  been  allot- 
ted to  him  for  the  purpose  of  maintaining  the  exalted  rank 
to  which  it  had  pleased  God  to  call  him.  The  long  series  of 
exquisite  mortifications  and  pinching  privations  arising  from 
this  inadequacy  of  means,  had,  however,  the  Earl  doubted 
not,  being  designed  by  Providence  as  a  trial  of  his  constancy, 
and  from  which  he  would,  in  due  time,  issue  like  thrice  re- 
fined gold.  Then  also  would  doubtless  be  remembered  in  his 
favor  the  innumerable  instances  of  his  condescension  in  min- 
gling in  the  most  open  manner  with  those  who  were  unques- 
tionably his  inferiors,  sacrificing  his  own  feelings  of  lofty  and 
fastidious  exclusiveness,  and  endeavoring  to  advance  the  in- 
terests, and,  as  far  as  influence  and  example  went,  polish  and 
refine  the  manners  of  the  lower  orders  of  society.  Such  is  an 
outline— alas  how  faint  and  imperfect !— of  the  character  of 
this  great  and  good  man,  the  Earl  of  Dreddlington.  As  for 
his  domestic  and  family  circumstances,  he  had  been  a  widow- 
er for  some  fifteen  years,  his  countess  having  brought  him 
but  one  child,  Lady  Cecilia  Philippa  Leopoldina  Plantagenet, 
who  was,  in  almost  all  respects,  me  counterpart  of  her  illus- 
trious father.  She  resembled  him  not  a  little  in  feature, 
only  that  she  partook  of  the  plainness  of  her  mother.  Her 
complexion  was  delicately  fair ;  but  her  features  had  no 
other  expression  than  that  of  a  languid  hauteur.  Her  upper 
eyelids  drooped  as  if  she  could  hardly  keep  them  open ;  the 
upper  jaw  projected  considerably  over  the  under  one ;  and 
her  front  teeth  were  prominent  and  exposed.  Frigid  and  in- 
animate, she  seemed  to  take  but  little  interest  in  anything 
on  earth.  In  person  she  was  of  average  height,  of  slender 
and  well  proportioned  figure,  and  an  erect  and  graceful  car- 
riage, only  that  she  had  a  habit  of  throwing  her  head-a  little 
backward,  that  gave  her  a  singularly  disdainful  appearance. 
She  had  reached  her  twenty-seventh  year  without  having 
had  an  eligible  offer  of  marriage,  though  she  would  be  the 
possessor  of  a  barony  in  her  own  right,  and  £5000  a-year ;  a 
circumstance,  which,  it  may  be  believed^  not  a  little  embit- 
tered her.  She  inherited  her  father's  pride  in  all  its  plenti- 
tude.  You  should  have  seen  the  haughty  couple  sitting 


TEN  THOUSAND  A-TEAR.  395 

silently  side  by  side  in  the  old-fashioned  yellow  family  char- 
iot, as  they  drove  round  the  crowded  park,  returning  the 
salutations  of  those  they  met  in  the  slightest  manner  possible. 
A  glimpse  of  them  at  such  a  moment  would  have  given  you 
a  far  more  just  and  lively  notion  of  their  real  character,  than 
the  most  anxious  and  labored  description  of  mine. 

Ever  since  the  first  Earl  of  Dreddlington  had,  through  a 
bitter  pique  conceived  against  his  eldest  son,  the  second  earl, 
diverted  the  principal  family  revenues  to  the  younger 
branch,  leaving  the  title  to  be  supported  by  only  £5000  a- 
year,  there  had  been  a  complete  arrangement  between  the 
elder  and  the  younger— the  titled  and  the  moneyed— branches 
of  the  family.  On  Mr.  Aubrey's  attaining  his  majority,  how- 
ever, the  present  earl  sanctioned  overtures  being  made  to- 
wards a  reconcilation,  being  of  opinion  that  Mr.  Aubrey  and 
Lady  Cecilia  might,  by  intermarriage,  effect  a  happy  re- 
union of  family  interests ;  an  object,  this,  that  had  long  lain 
nearer  his  heart  than  any  other  upon  earth,  till,  in  fact,  it 
became  a  kind  of  passion.  Actuated  by  such  considerations, 
he  had  done  more  to  conciliate  Mr.  Aubrey  than  he  had  ever 
done  towards  any  one  on  earth.  It  was,  however,  in  vain. 
Mr.  Aubrey's  first  delinquency  was,  an  unqualified  and  en- 
thusiastic adoption  of  Tory  principles.  Now,  all  the  Dred- 
dlingtons,  from  time  whereof  the  memory  of  man  runneth 
not  to  the  contrary,  had  been  firm  unflinching  Tories,  till 
the  distinguished  father  of  the  present  earl  quietly  walked 
over  one  day  to  the  other  side  of  the  House  of  Lords,  com- 
pletely fascinated  by  a  bit  of  ribbon  which  the  minister  held 
up  before  him  :  and  before  he  had  sat  in  that  wonder-working 
region,  the  ministerial  side  of  the  House,  twenty-four  hours, 
he  discovered  that  the  true  signification  of  Tory,  was  bigot 
—and  of  Whig,  patriot :  and  he  stuck  to  that  version  till  it 
transformed  him  into  a  gold  stick,  in  which  capacity  he  died, 
having  repeatedly  and  solemnly  impressed  upon  his  son  the 
necessity  and  advantage  of  taking  the  same  view  of  public 
affairs,  with  a  view  to  arrive  at  similar  results.  And  in  the 
way  in  which  he  had  been  trained  up,  most  religiously  had 
gone  the  earl ;  and  see  the  result ;  he,  also,  attained  to 
eminent  and  responsible  office — to  wit,  that  of  Lord 
Steward  of  the  Household.  Now,  things  standing  thus— 
how  could  the  earl  so  compromise  his  principles,  and  in- 
directly  injure  his  party,  as  by  suffering  his  daughter  to 
marry  a  Tory  ?  Great  g^rief  and  vexation  of  spirit  did  this 
matter,  therefore,  occasion  to  that  excellent  nobleman.  But, 
secondly,  Aubrey  not  only  declined  to  marry  his  cousin,  but 
clenched  his  refusal,  and  sealed  his  final  exclusion  from  the 
dawning  good  opinion  and  affections  of  the  earl,  by  marry- 
ing, as  hath  been  seen,  some  one  else— Miss  St.  Clair. 
Thenceforth  there  was  a  great  gulf  between  the  Earl  ot 
Dreddlington  and  the  Aubreys.  Whenever  they  happened 
to  meet,  the  earl  greeted  him  with  an  elaborate  bow,  and  a 


TEN  THOUSAND  A-TEAE. 

petrifying  smile ;  but  for  the  last  seven  years,  not  one 
syllable  had  passed  between  them.  As  for  Mr.  Aubrey,  he 
had  never  been  otherwise  than  amused  at  the  eccentric  airs 
of  his  magnificent  kinsman. — Now,  was  it  not  a  hard  thing 
for  the  earl  to  bear— namely,  the  prospect  there  was  that  his 
barony  and  estates  might  devolve  upon  this  Aubrey,  or  his 
issue  ?  for  Lady  Cecilia,  alas !  enjoyed  but  precarious  health, 
and  her  chances  of  marrying  seemed  daily  diminishing. 
This  was  a  thorn  in  the  poor  earl's  flesh  ;  a  source  of  con- 
stant worn/ to  him,  sleeping  and  waking:  and  proud  as  he 
was,  and  with  such  good  reason,  he  would  have  gone  down 
on  his  knees  and  prayed  to  heaven  to  avert  so  direful  a 
calamity — to  see  his  daughter  married. 

Such  being  the  relative  position  of  Mr.  Aubrey  and  the 
Earl  of  Dreddlington  at  the  time  when  this  history  opens, 
it  is  easy  for  the  reader  to  imagine  the  lively  interest  with 
which  the  earl  first  heard  of  the  tidings  that  a  stranger  had 
set  up  a  title  to  the  whole  of  the  Yatton  estates ;  and  the 
silent  but  profound  anxiety  with  which  he  continued  to  re- 
gard the  progress  of  the  affair.  He  obtained,  from  time  to 
time?  by  means  of  confidential  inquiries  instituted  by  his 
solicitor,  a  general  notion  of  the  nature  of  the  new  claimant's 
pretensions  ;  but,  with  a  due  degree  of  delicacy  towards  his 
unfortunate  kinsman,  he  studiously  concealed  the  interest 
he  felt  in  so  important  a  family  question  as  the  succession  to 
the  Yatton  property.  The  earl  and  his  daughter  were  ex- 
ceedingly anxious  to  seethe  claimant:  and  when  he  heard 
that  that  claimant  was  a  gentleman  ot  "  decided  Whig  prin- 
ciples"— the  earl  was  very  near  setting  it  down  as  a  sort  of 
special  interference  of  Providence  in  his  favor ;  and  one  that, 
in  the  natural  order  of  things,  would  lead  to  the  accomplish- 
ment of  the  other  wishes  of  the  earl.  Who  knew  but  that, 
before  a  twelvemonth  had  passed  over,  the  two  branches  of 
the  family  might  not  be  in  a  fair  way  of  being  reunited— and 
thus,  among  other  incidents,  invest  the  earl  with  the  virtual 
patronage  of  the  borough  of  .Yatton,  and,  in  the  event  of 
their  return  to  power,  strengthen  his  claim  upon  his  party 
for  his  long-coveted  marquisate?  He  had  gone  to  the  con- 
tinent a  few  days  before  the  trial  of  the  eiectment  at  York  ; 
and  did  not  return  till  a  day  or  two  after  the  Court  of  King's 
Bench  had  solemnly  declared  the  validity  of  the  plaintiffs 
title  to  the  Yatton  property,  and  consequently  established 
his  right  of  succession  to  the  barony  of  Drelincourt.  Of 
this  event  a  lengthened  account  was  given  in  one  of  the 
Yorkshire  papers  which  fell  under  the  earl's  eye  the  day 
after  his  arrival  from  abroad;  and  to  the  report  of  the 
decision  of  the  question  of  law,  was  appended  the  following 
paragraph : — 

"  In  consequence  of  the  above  decision,  Mr.  Aubrey,  we 
are  able  to  state  on  the  best  authority,  has  given  formal 
notice  of  his  intention  to  surrender  the  entire  of  the  Yatton 


THOUSAND  A-YEAR.  397 

property  without  further  litigation;  thus  making  the 
promised  amends  in  his  power  to  those  whom  he  has— we 
cannot  doubt  unwittingly — injured.  He  has  also  accepted 
the  Chiltern  Hundreds,  and  has  consequently  retired  trom 
Parliament ;  so  that  the  borough  of  Yatton  is  now  vacant. 
We  sincerely  hope  that  the  new  proprietor  of  Yatton  will 
either  himself  sit  for  the  borough,  and  announce  immediately 
his  intention  of  doing  so,  or  give  his  prompt  and  decisive 
support  to  some  gentleman  of  decided  Whig  principles.  We 
say  prompt— -for  the  enemy  is  vigilant  and  crafty.  Men  at 
Yatton!  To  the  rescue!! !— Mr.  Titmouse  is  now,  we  be- 
lieve, in  London.  This  fortunate  gentleman  is  not  only  now 
in  possession  of  the  fine  property  at  Yatton,  with  an  unen- 
cumbered rent-roll  of  from  twelve  to  fifteen  thousand  a- 
year,  and  the  vast  accumulation  of  rents  to  be  handed  over 
by  the  late  possessor,  but  is  now  next  but  one  in  succession 
to  the  earldom  of  Dreddlington  and  barony  of  Drelincourt, 
with  the  large  family  estates  annexed  thereto.  We  believe 
this  is  the  oldest  barony  in  the  kingdom.  It  must  be  a 
source  of  great  gratification  to  the  present  earl  to  know  that 
his  probable  successor  professes  the  same  liberal  and  en- 
lightened political  opinions,  of  which  his  lordship  has,  during 
his  long  and  distinguished  political  life,  been  so  able  and 
consistent  a  supporter." 

The  Earl  of  Dreddlington  was  slightly  flustered  on  reading 
the  above  paragraph.  He  perused  it  several  times  with  in- 
creasing satisfaction.  The  time  had  at  length  arrived  for 
him  to  take  decisive  steps ;  nay,  duty  to  his  newly-discovered 
kinsman  required  it. 

Messrs.  Titmouse  and  Gammon  were  walking  arm-in-arm 
down  Oxford  Street,  on  their  return  from  some  livery-stables, 
where  they  had  been  looking  at. a  horse  which  Titmouse  was 
thinking  of  purchasing,  when  an  incident  occurred  which 
ruffled  him  not  a  little.  He  had  been  recognized  and  publicly 
accosted  by  a  vulgar  fellow,  with  a  yard-measure  m  his  hand, 
and  a  large  parcel  of  drapery  under  his  arm — in  fact,  by  our 
old  friend  Mr.  Huckaback.  In  vain  did  Mr.  Titmouse  affect, 
for  some  time,  not  to  see  his  old  acquaintance,  and  to  be  ear- 
nestly engaged  in  conversation  with  Mr.  Gammon. 

"  Ah,  Titty !— Titmouse !  Well,  Mister  Titmouse— how  are 
you  ?— Devilish  long  time  since  we  met  !  "  Titmouse  directed 
a  look  at  him  which  he  wished  could  have  blighted  him,  and 
quickened  his  pace  without  taking  any  further  notice  of  the 
presumptuous  intruder.  Huckaback's  blood  was  up,  however, 
—roused  by  this  ungrateful  and  insolent  treatment  from  one 
who  had  been  under  such  great  obligations  to  him;  and 
quickening  his  pace  also,  he  kept  alongside  with  Titmouse. 

"  Ah,"  continued  Huckaback,  "  why  do  you  cut  me  in  this 
way  Titty  ?  You  aren't  ashamed  of  me,  surely  ?  Many's  the 
time  you've  tramped  up  and  down  Oxford  Street  with  your 
bundle  and  yard-measure — " 


898  TEN  THOUSAND  A-YEAR. 

"  Fellow !"  at  length  exclaimed  Titmouse  indignantly,"  'Pott 
m  v  life  I'll  give  you  in  charge  if  you  go  on  so !  Be  otf ,  you  low 
fellow !— Dem  vulgar  brute  ! "  he  subjoined  in  a  lower  tone, 
bursting  into  perspiration,  for  he  had  not  forgotten  the  inso- 
lent pertinacity  of  Huckaback  s  disposition. 

"My  eyes!  Give  me  in  charge?  Come,  I  like  that,  rather 
—You  vagabond !  Pay  me  what  you  owe  me !  You're  a  swin- 
dler !  You  owe  me  fifty  pounds,  you  do  !  You  sent  a  man  to 
rob  me  ! ' 

"  Will  any  one  get  a  constable  ?  "  inquired  Titmouse,  who 
had  grown  as  white  as  death.  The  little  crowd  that  was  col- 
lecting round  them  began  to  suspect,  from  Titmouse's  agitat- 
ed appearance,  that  there  must  be  some  foundation  for  the 
charges  made  against  him. 

"  Oh,  go,  get  a  constable  !  Nothing  I  should  like  better ! 
Ah,  my  fine  gentleman— what's  the  time  of  day,  when  chaps 
like  you  are  wound  up  so  high  ?  " 

Gammon's  interference  was  in  vain.  Huckaback  got  more 
abusive  and  noisy ;  no  constable  was  at  hand ;  so,  to  escape 
the  intolerable  interruption  and  nuisance,  he  beckoned  a 
coach  off  the  stand,  which  was  close  by ;  and  Titmouse  and 
he  stepping  into  it,  they  were  soon  out  of  sight  and  hearing 
of  Mr.  Huckaback.  Having  taken  a  shilling  drive,  they 
alighted,  and  walked  towards  Covent  Garden.  As  they  ap- 
proached the  hotel,  they  observed  a  yellow  chariot,  at  once 
elegant  and  somewhat  old-fashioned,  rolling  away  from  the 
door. 

"I  wonder  who  that  is,"  said  Gammon ;  "  it's  an  earl's  cor- 
onet on  the  panel ;  and  a  white-haired  old  gentleman  was  sit- 
ting low  down  in  the  corner — 

"Ah— it's  no  doubt  a  fine  thing  to  be  a  lord,  and  all  that 
— but  I'll  answer  for  it,  some  of  'em's  as  poor  as  a  church- 
mouse,"  replied  Titmouse  as  they  entered  the  hotel.  At  that 
moment  the  waiter,  with  a  most  profound  bow,  presented  him 
with  a  letter  and  a  card,  which  had  only  the  moment  before 
been  left  for  him.  The  card  was  thus: — 


THE  EARL  OF  DREDDLIXGTOX. 


GKOSVENOB   SQUARE. 


and  there  was  written  on  it,  in  pencil,  in  rather  a  feeble  and 
hurried  character — "  For  Mr.  Titmouse." 

"  My  stars,  Mr.  Gammon ! "  exclaimed  Titmouse  excitedly, 
addressing  Mr.  Gammon,  who  also  seemed  greatly  interested 
by  the  occurrence.  They  both  repaired  to  a  vacant  table  at  the 
extremity  of  the  room ;  and  Titmouse,  with  not  a  little  trep 


THOUSAND  A-TEAR.  399 

idation,  hastily  breaking  a  large  seal  which  contained  the 
Earl's  family  arms,  with  their  crowded  quarterings  and  grim 
supporters— better  appreciated  by  Gammon,  however,  than 
by  Titmouse— opened  the  ample  envelope,  and,  unfolding  its 
thick  gilt-edged  enclosure,  read  as  follows  ;— 

• 

"  The  Earl  of  Dreddlington  has  the  honor  of  waiting  upon 
Mr.  Titmouse,  in  whom  he  is  very  happy  to  have,  though  un- 
expectedly, discovered  so  near  a  kinsman.  On  the  event 
which  has  brought  this  to  pass,  the  Earl  congratulates  him- 
self not  less  than  Mr.  Titmouse,  and  hopes  for  the  earliest 
opportunity  of  a  personal  introduction. 

The  Earl  leaves  town  to-day,  and  will  not  return  till  Mon- 
day next,  on  which  day  he  begs  the  favor  of  Mr.  Titmouse's 
company  to  dinner,  at  six  o'clock.  He  may  depend  upon  its 
being  strictly  a  family  reunion;  the  only  person  present, 
besides  Mr.  Titmouse  and  the  Earl,  being  the  Lady  Cecilia. 

"  Grosvenor  Square,  Thursday. 
*'  TITTLEBAT  TITMOUSE,  ESQ.,  etc.  etc." 

As  soon  as  Titmouse  had  read  the  above,  still  holding  it  in 
his  hand,  he  gazed  at  Gammon  with  mute  apprehension  and 
delight.  Of  the  existence,  indeed,  of  the  magnificent  personage 
who  had  just  introduced  himself,  Titmouse  had  certainly 
heard,  from  time  to  time,  since  the  commencement  of  the  pro- 
ceedings which  had  just  been  so  successfully  terminated.  He 
had  seen  the  brightness,  to  be  sure  ;  but,  as  a  sort  of  remote 
splendor,  like  that  of  a  fixed  star  which  gleamed  brightly, 
but  at  too  vast  a  distance  to  have  any  sensible  influence,  or 
even  to  arrest  his  attention.  After  a  little  while,  Titmouse 
began  to  chatter  very  volubly ;  but  Gammon,  after  reading 
over  the  note  once  or  twice,  seemed  not  much  inclined  for  con- 
versation; and,  had  Titmouse  been  accustomed  to  observa- 
tion, he  might  have  gathered,  from  the  eye  and  brow  of  Gam- 
mon, that  that  gentleman's  mind  was  very  deeply  occupied 
by  some  matter  or  other,  probably  suggested  by  the  incident 
which  had  just  taken  place.  Titmouse,  by  the  by,  called  for 
pens,  ink,  and  paper,—"  the  very  best  gilt>edged  paper,  mind  " 
and  prepared  to  reply  to  Lord  Dreddlington's  note.  Gammon, 
however,  who  knew  the  peculiarities  of  his  friend's  style  of 
correspondence,  suggested  that  he  should  draw  up,  and  Tit- 
mouse copy  the  following  note.  This  was  presently  done ; 
but  when  Gammon  observed  how  thickly  studded  it  was  with 
capital  letters,  the  numerous  flourishes  with  which  it  was 
garnished,  and  its  more  than  questionable  orthography,  he 

Erevailed  on  Titmouse,  after  some  little  difficulty,  to  allow 
im  to  transcribe  the  note  which  was  to  be  sent  to  Lord  Dred- 
lington.    Here  it  is — 

"  Mr.  Titmouse  begs  to  present  his  compliments  to  the  Earl 
of  Dreddlington,  and  to  express  the  high  sense  he  entertains 


400  TEN  THOUSAND  A-YEAR. 

of  the  kind  consideration  evinced  by  his  lordship  in  his  call 
and  note  of  to-day. 

"  One  of  the  most  gratifying  circumstances  connected  with 
Mr.  Titmouse's  recent  success,  is  the  distinguished  alliance 
which  his  lordship  has  been  so  prompt  and  courteous  in  rec- 
ognizing. Mr.  Titmouse  will  feel  tne  greatest  pleasure  in 
availing  himself  of  the  Earl  of  Dreddlington's  invitation  to 
dinner  for  Monday  next. 

"  Cabbage-Stalk  Hotel,  Thursday. 
"  The  Right  Honble.  the  EARL  OF  DREDDLINGTON,  etc.  etc.* 

"  Have  you  a  '  Peerage '  here,  waiter  ?  "  inquired  Gammon, 
as  the  waiter  brought  him  a  lighted  taper.  Debrett  was 
shortly  laid  before  him ;  and  turning  to  the  name  of  Dred- 
dlington,  he  read  over  what  has  been  already  laid  before  the 
reader.  "  Humph—'  Lady  Cecilia  '—here  she  is— his  daugh- 
ter—I thought  as  much— I  see!"  This  was  what  passed 
through  his  mind,  as— having  left  Titmouse,  who  set  off  to 
deposit  a  card  and  the  above  "  Answer  "  at  Lord  Dreddling- 
ton's— he  made  his  way  towards  the  delectable  regions  in 
which  their  office  was  situated — Saffron  Hill.  "  'Tis  curious 
— amusing— interesting,  to  observe  his  progress  "—continued 
Gammon  to  himself— 

''  Tag-rag— and  his  daughter  ; 

"  Quirk — and  his  daughter ; 

"  The  Earl  of  Dreddlington — and  his  daugnter.  How  many 
more  ?  Happy !  happy !  happy  Titmouse ! " 

The  sun  that  was  rising  upon  Titmouse  was  setting  upon 
the  Aubrey's.  Dear,  delightful— now  too  dear,  now  too  de- 
lightful— Yatton !  the  shades  of  evening  are  descending  upon 
thee,  and  thy  virtuous  but  afflicted  occupants,  who,  early  on 
the  morrow,  quit  thee  forever.  Approach  silently  yon  con- 
servatory. Behold  in  the  midst  of  it  the  dark  slight  figure 
of  a  lady,  solitary,  motionless,  in  melancholy  attitude— her 
hands  clasped  before  her ;  it  is  Miss  Aubrey.  Her  face  is 
beautiful,  but  grief  is  in^her  eye  ;  and  her  bosom  heaves  with 

'y sounds  au- 
[ate  Aubrey. 

Jl    V»  CI/O    O.LHS,    JlllUtCVA   ,      ill  HI      U111O       VV  OiO     iJCl       .UIOU     VIOlt      tO    IlCr    COn- 

servatory.  Many  rare,  delicate,  and  beautiful  flowers  were 
there  ;  the  air  was  laden  with  the  fragrant  odors  which  they 
exhaled,  as  it  were  in  sighs,  on  account  of  the  dreaded  de- 
parture of  their  lovely  mistress.  At  length  she  stooped  down, 
and  in  stooping,  a  tear  fell  right  upon  the  small  sprig  of  ger- 
anium which  she  gently  detached  from  its  stem,  and  placed 
in  her  bosom.  "  Sweet  flowers."  thought  she,  "  who  will  tend 
you  as  I  have  tended  you,  when  I  am  gone  ?  Why  do  you 
look  now  more  beautiful  than  ever  you  did  before?"  Her 
eye  fell  upon  the  spot  on  which,  till  the  day  before,  had  stood 
her  aviary.  Poor  Kate  had  sent  it,  as  a  present,  to  Lady  DQ 


TEN  THOUSAND  A-YEAR.  401 

la  Zouch,  and  it  was  then  at  Fotheringham  Castle.  What 
a  flutter  there  used  to  be  among  the  beautiful  little  creatures 
when  they  perceived  Kate's  approach !  She  turned  her  head 
away.  She  felt  oppressed,  and  attributed  it  to  the  closeness 
of  the  conservatory— the  strength  of  the  odors  given  out  by 
the  numerous  flowers ;  but  it  was  sorrow  that  oppressed  her ; 
and  she  Avas  in  a  state  at  once  of  mental  excitement  and 
physical  exhaustion.  The  last  few  weeks  had  been  an  inter- 
val of  exquisite  suffering.  She  could  not  be  happy  alone,  and 
yet  could  not  bear  the  company  of  her  brother  and  her  sister- 
in-law,  nor  that  of  their  innocent  children.  Quitting  the  con- 
servatory with  a  look  of  lingering  fondness,  she  passed  along 
into  the  house  with  a  hurried  step,  and  escaped,  unobserved, 
to  her  chamber— the  very  chamber  in  which  the  reader  ob- 
tained his  first  distant  and  shadowy  gUmpse  of  her  ;  and  in 
which,  now  entering  it  silently  and  suddenly,  the  door  being 
only  closed,  not  shut,  she  observed  her  faithful  little  maid 
Harriet,  sitting  in  tears  before  a  melancholy  heap  of  packages 
prepared  for  travelling  on  the  morrow.  She  rose  as  Miss  Au- 
brey entered,  and  presently  exclaimed  passionately,  bursting 
afresh  into  tears,  Ma'am,  I  can't  leave  you— indeed  I  can't ! 
I  know  all  your  ways ;  I  won't  go  to  anyone  else  !  I  shall  hate 
service  !  and  I  know  they'll  hate  me  too ;  for  I  shall  cry  my- 
self to  death ! " 

"  Come,  come,  Harriet  "  faltered  Miss  Aubrey,  "  this  is  very 
foolish ;  nay,  it  is  unkind  to  distress  me  in  this  manner  at  the 
last  moment." 

"  Oh,  ma'am,  if  you  did  but  know  how  I  love  you !  How 
I'd  go  on  my  knees  to  serve  you  all  the  rest  of  the  days  of  my 
life?" 

"  Don't  talk  in  that  way,  Harriet ;  that's  a  good  gir!2"  said 
Miss  Aubrey,  rather  faintly,and,  sinking  into  the  chair,  she 
buried  her  face  in  her  handkerchief,  "  you  know  I've  had  a 
great  deal  to  go  through,  Harriet,  and  am  in  very  poor  spirits." 

"  I  know  it,  ma'am,  I  do ;  and  that's  why  I  can't  bear  to 
leave  you ! "  She  sank  on  her  knees  beside  Miss  Aubrey. 
"  Oh,  ma'am,  if  you  would  but  let  me  stay  with  you  !  I've 
been 
to 


my 

up  your  dresses  here !  to  think  that  I  shan't  be  with  you  to 
unpack  them;  it's  very  hard,  ma'am,  that  madam's  maid  is 
to  go  with  her,  and  I'm  not  to  go  with  you!  " 

"  We  must  have  made  a  choice,  Harriet,"  said  Miss  Aubrey, 
with  forced  calmness. 

"Yes,  ma'am;  but  why  didn't  you  choose  us  both?  Be- 
cause we've  both  always  done  our  best ;  and,  as  for  me,  you've 
never  spoke  an  unkind  word  to  me  in  your  life — 

"  Harriet,  Harriet."  said  Miss  Aubrey  tremulously,  "  I've 
several  times  explained  to  you  that  we  cannot  any  longer  af- 


402  TEN  THOUSAND  A-YEAR. 

ford  each  to  have  our  own  maid ;  and  Mrs.  Aubrey's  maid  is 
older  than  you.  and  knows  how  to  manage  children ' 

"  What  signifies  affording,  ma'am?  Neither  she  nor  I  will 
ever  take  a  shilling  of  wages :  I'd  really  rather  serve  you  for 
nothing,  ma'am,  than  any  other  lady  for  a  hundred  pounds 
a-year !  Oh,  so  happy  as  I've  been  in  your  service,  ma'am ! " 
she  added  bitterly. 

"  Don't  Harriet— you  would  not,  if  you  knew  the  pain  you 
give  me,"  said  Miss  Aubrey  faintly.  Harriet  got  up,  poured 
out  a  glass  of  water,  and  forced  her  pale  mistress  to  swallow 
a  little,  Ayhich  presently  revived  her. 

"  Harriet,"  said  she,  u  you  have  never  once  disobeyed  me, 
and  now  I  am  certain  that  you  won't.  I  assure  you  that  we 
have  made  all  our  arrangements,  and  cannot  alter  them.  I 
have  been  very  fortunate  in  obtaining  for  you  so  kind  a  mis- 
tress as  Lady  Stratton.  Remember,  Harriet,  she  was  the 

oldest  bosom  friend  of  my "  Miss  Aubrey's  voice  trembled, 

and  she  ceased  speaking  for  a  minute  or  two,  during  which 
she  struggled  against  her  feelings  with  momentary  success. 
"  Here's  the  prayer-book,"  she  presently  resumed,  opening  a 
drawer  in  her  dressing-table,  and  taking  out  a  small  volume 
— "  Here's  the  prayer-book  I  promised  you ;  it  is  very  prettily 
bound,  and  I  have  written  your  name  in  it,  Harriet,  as  you 
desired.  Take  it,  and  keep  it  for  my  sake.  Will  you  ?  " 

"  Oh,  ma'am,"  replied  the  girl  bitterly,  "  I  shall  never  bear 
to  look  at  it,  but  I'll  never  part  with  it  till  I  die." 

"  Now,  leave  me,  Harriet,  for  a  short  time— I  wish  to  be 
alone,"  said  Miss  Aubrey ;  and  she  was  obeyed.  She  present- 
ly rose  and  bolted  the  door ;  and  then,  secure  from  interrup- 
tion, walked  slowly  to  and  fro  for  some  time ;  and  a  long  and 
deep  current  of  melancholy  thoughts  and  feelings  flowed 
through  her  mind  and  her  heart.  She  had  but  a  short  time 
before  seen  her  sister's  sweet  children  put  into  their  little 
beds  for  the  last  time  at  Yatton ;  and,  together  with  their 
mother,  had  hung  fondly  over  them,  kissing  and  embracing 
them— their  little  fellow  wanderers— till  her  feelings  com- 
pelled her  to  leave  them.  One  by  one  all  the  dear  innumer- 
able ties  that  had  attached  her  to  Yatton,  and  'everything 
connected  with  it,  ever  since  her  birth,  had  been  severed  and 
broken— ties,  not  only  the  strength,  but  very  existence  of 
which,  she  had  scarce  been  aware  of  till  then.  She  had  bade 
—as  had  all  of  them— repeated  and  agonizing  farewells  to  dear 
and  old  friends.  Her  very  heart  within  her  trembled  as  she 
gazed  at  the  objects  familiar  to  her  eye,  and  pregnant  with 
innumerable  little  softening  associations,  ever  since  her  in- 
fancy. Nothing  around  them  now  belonged  to  them— but  to 
a  stranger— to  one  who— she  shuddered  with  disgust.  She 
thought  of  the  fearful  position  in  which  her  brother  was 
placed— entirely  at  the  mercy  of,  it  might  be,  selfish  and  ra- 
pacious men— what  indeed  was  to  become  of  all  of  them  ?  At 
length  she  threw  herself  into  the  large  old  easy  chair  which 


TEN  THOUSAND  A-YEAE.  403 

stood  near  the  window,  and  with  a  fluttering  heart  and  hasty 
tremulous  hand,  drew  an  open  letter  from  her  bosom.  She 
held  it  for  some  moments,  as  if  dreading  again  to  peruse  it— 
but  at  length  unfolded  and  read  a  portion  of  it.  'Twas  full  of 
fervent  and  at  the  same  time  delicate  expressions  of  fondness ; 
and  after  a  short  while,  her  hand  dropped  with  the  letter 
upon  her  lap,  and  she  burst  into  a  passionate  flood  of  tears. 
After  an  interval  of  several  minutes,  she  again  took  up  the 
letter— read  a  little  further— still  more  and  more  moved  by 
the  generous  and  noble  sentiments  it  contained — and,  at 
length,  utterly  overcome,  she  again  dropped  her  hand,  and 
sobbed  aloud  long  and  vehemently.  "  It  cannot— cannot — no 
it  cannot  be, ''she  murmured,  and  yielded  to  her  feelings  for 
a  long  while,  her  tears  showering  down  her  pallid,  beautiful 
cheeks 

At  length  she  came  to  the  conclusion :  in  a  kind  of  agony 
she  pressed  the  signature  to  her  lips,  and  then  hastily  fold- 
ing up  the  letter,  replaced  it  whence  she  had  taken  it,  and 
continued  sobbing  bitterly.  Alas,  what  additional  poignancy 
did  this  give  to  the  agonies  of  her  last  evening  at  Yatton  ! 
She  had,  however  become  somewhat  calmer  by  the  time  that 
she  heard  the  door  hastily,  but  gently  tapped  at,  and  then 
attempted  to  be  opened.  Miss  Aubrey  rose  and  unbolted  it, 
and  Mrs.  Aubrey  entered,  her  beautiful  countenance  as  pale 
and  sad  as  that  of  her  sister-in-law.  She,  however,  was  both 
wife  and  mother ;  and  the  various  cares  which  these  rela- 
tions entailed  upon  her  at  a  bitter  moment  like  the  present, 
served,  in  some  measure,  to  occupy  her  thoughts,  and  pre- 
vent her  from  being  absorbed  by  the  heart-breaking  circum- 
stances which  surrounded  her.  Suffering  had,  however,  a 
little  impaired  her  beauty ;  her  cheek  was  very  pale,  and  her 
eye  and  brow  laden  with  trouble. 

"  Kate,  dear  Kate,"  said  she  rather  quickly,  closing  the 
door  after  her,  "  what  is  to  be  done  ?  Did  you  hear  carriage- 
wheels  a  few  moments  ago  ?  Who  do  you  think  have  arriv- 
ed ?  As  I  fancied  would  be  the  case,  the  De  la  Zouches." 
Miss  Aubrey  trembled  and  turned  pale.  '"  You  must  see— you 
must  see— Lady  De  la  Zouch,  Kate— they  have  driven  from 
Fotheringham  on  purpose  to  take— once  more— &  last  fare- 
well !  Tis  very  painful,  but  what  can  be  done  ?  You  know 
what  dear,  dear,  good  friends  they  are  !  " 

"  Is  Lord  De  la  Zouch  come,  also  ?  "  inquired  Miss  Aubrey 
apprehensively 

"  I  will  not  deceive  you,  dearest  Kate,  they  are  all  come ; 
but  she  only  is  in  the  house :  they  are  gone  out  to  look  for 
Charles,  who  is  walking  in  the  park."  Miss  Aubrey  gave  a 
sudden  shudder ;  and  after  evidently,  a  violent  struggle  with 
her  feelings,  the  color  having  entirely  deserted  her  face,  and 
left  it  of  an  ashy  whiteness,  "  I  cannot  muster  up  resolution 
enough,  Agnes,"  she  whispered.  "I  know  their  errand. 

"  Care  not  about  their  errand  love !    You  shall  not  be  trou- 


404  TEN  THOUSAND  A-YEAK. 

bled — you  shall  not  be  persecuted."  Miss  Aubrey  shook 
her  head,  and  grasped  Mrs.  Aubrey's  hand. 

"  They  do  not,  they  cannot  persecute  me.  It  is  a  cruel  and 
harsh  word  to  use— and ! — consider  how  noble,  how  disinter- 
ested is  their  conduct :  it  is  that  which  subdues  me ! " 

Mrs.  Aubrey  threw  her  arms  around  her  agitated  sister-in- 
law,  and  tenderly  kissed  her  forehead. 

"  Oh,  Agnes ! "  faltered  Miss  Aubrey,  pressing  her  hand 
upon  her  heart  to  relieve  the  intolerable  oppression  she  suf- 
fered— "  would  to  Heaven  that  I  had  never  seen — never 
thought  of  him ! " 

"  Don't  fear,  Kate !  that  he  will  attempt  to  see  you  on  so 
sad  an  occasion  as  this.  Delamere  is  a  man  of  infinite  deli- 
cacy and  generosity!  " 

"  I  know  he  is,  I  Know  he  is,"  gasped  Miss  Aubrey. 

"  Stay,  I'll  tell  you  what  to  do ;  I'll  go  down  and  return 
with  Lady  De  la  Zouch :  we  can  see  her  here,  undisturbed 
and  alone,  for  a  few  moments  ;  and  then,  nothing  painful 
can  occur.  Shall  I  bring  her  ?  "  she  inquired,  rising.  Miss 
Aubrey  did  not  dissent ;  and  within  a  very  few  minutes'  time, 
Mrs.  Aubrey  returned,  accompanied  by  Lady  De  la  Zouch, 
rather  an  elderly  woman,  her  countenance  still  handsome  ; 
of  very  dignified  carriage,  of  an  extremely  mild  disposition, 
and  passionately  fond  of  Miss  Aubrey.  Hastily  drawing 
aside  her  veil  as  she  entered  the  room,  she  stepped  quickly 
up  to  Miss  Aubrey,  kissed  her,  and  for  a  few  moments  grasp- 
ed her  hands  in  silence. 

"  This  is  very  sad  work,  Miss  Aubrey,"  said  she  at  length, 
hurriedly  glancing  at  the  luggage  lying  piled  up  at  the  other 
end  of  the  room.  Miss  Aubrey  made  no  answer,  but  shook 
her  head.  "  It  was  useless  attempting  it,  we  could  not  stay 
at  home;  we  have  risked  being  charged  with  cruel  intru- 
sion; forgive  me,  dearest,  will  you?  They  will  not  come 
near  you ! "  Miss  Aubrey  trembled.  "  I  feel  as  if  I  were 
parting  with  a  daughter,  Kate,"  said  Lady  De  la  Zouch  with 
sudden  emotion.  How  your  mamma  and  I  loved  one  an- 
other !  "  and  she  burst  into  tears. 

"  For  mercy's  sake,  open  the  window ;  I  feel  suffocated," 
faltered  Miss  Aubrey.  Mrs.  Aubrey  threw  up  the  window, 
and  the  cool  refreshing  breeze  of  evening  quickly  diffused  it- 
self through  the  apartment,  and  revived  the  drooping  spirits 
of  Miss  Aubrey,  who  walked  gently  to  and  fro  about  the 
room,  supported  by  Lady  De  la  Zoucn  and  Mrs.  Aubrey,  and 
soon  recovered  a  tolerable  degree  of  composure.  The  three 
ladies  presently  stood,  arm  in  arm,  gazing  through  the  deep 
bay  window  at  the  fine  and  extensive  prospect  which  it  com- 
manded. The  gloom  of  evening  was  beginning  to  steal  over 
the  landscape. 

"  How  beautiful !  "  exclaimed  Miss  Aubrey  faintly,  with  a 
deep  sigh. 

*•  The  window  in  tlie  northern  tower  of  the  castle  commands 


TEN  THOUSAND  A-YEAR.  405 

a  still  more  extensive  view,"  said  Lady  De  la  Zouch.  Miss 
Aubrey  suddenly  looked  at  her,  and  burst  into  tears.  After 
standing  gazing  through  the  window  for  some  time  longer, 
they  stepped  back  into  the  room,  and  were  soon  engaged  in 
deep  and  earnest  conversation. 

For  the  last  three  weeks  Mr.  Aubrey  had  addressed  him- 
self with  calmness  and  energy  to  the  painful  duties  which 
had  devolved  upon  him,  of  setting  his  house  in  order.  Im- 
mediately after  quitting  the  dinner-table  that  day— a  mere 
nominal  meal  to  himself,  his  wife,  and  sister— he  had  retired 
to  the  library,  to  complete  the  extensive  and  important  ar- 
rangements consequent  upon  his  abandoment  of  Yatton ;  and 
after  about  an  hour  thus  occupied,  he  went  forth  to  take  a 
solitary  walk — a  melancholy — a  last  walk  about  the  property. 
It  was  a  moment  that  severely  tried  his  fortitude  ;  but  that 
fortitude  stood  the  trial.  He  was  a  man  of  lively  sensibili- 
ties, and  appreciated,  to  its  utmost  extent,  the  melancholy 
and  alarming  change  that  had  come  over  his  fortunes. 
Surely  even  the  bluntest  and  coarsest  feelings  that  ever 
tried  to  disguise  and  dignify  themselves  under  the  name 
of  STOICISM — to  convert  into  bravery  and  fortitude  a  stu- 
pid, sullen  insensibility — must  have  been  not  a  little  shaken 
by  such  scenes  as  Mr.  Aubrey  had  had  to  pass  through 
during  the  last  few  weeks— scenes  which  I  do  not  choose 
to  distress  the  reader's  feelings  by  dwelling  upon  in  de- 
tail. Mr.  Aubrey  had  no  mean  pretensions  to  real  philoso- 
phy ;  but  he  had  still  juster  pretentions  to  an  infinitely  high- 
er character — that  of  a  CHRISTIAN.  He  had  a  firm  unwavering 
conviction  that  whatever  befell  him,  either  good  or  evil,  was 
the  ordination  of  the  Almighty — infinitely  wise,  infinitely 
good ;— and  this  was  the  source  of  his  fortitude  and  resigna- 
tion. He  felt  himself  here  standing  upon  ground  that  was 
immovable. 

To  avert  the  misfortune  which  menaced  him,  he  had  neg- 
lected no  rational  and  conscientious  means  to  retain  the  ad- 
vantages of  fortune  and  station  to  which  he  had  believed 
himself  born,  he  had  made  the  most  strenuous  exertions  con- 
sistent with  a  rigid  sense  of  honor.  What,  indeed,  could  he 
have  done  that  he  had  not  done  ?  He  had  caused  the  claims 
of  his  opponent  to  be  subjected  to  as  severe  and  skilful  a 
scrutiny  as  the  wit  of  man  could  suggest ;  and  they  had  stood 
the  test.  Those  claims,  and  his  own,  had  been  each  of  them 
placed  in  the  scales  of  justice  ;  those  scales  had  been  held  up 
and  poised  by  the  pure  and  firm  hands  to  which  the  laws  of 
God,  and  of  the  country,  had  committed  the  administration 
of  justice  :  on  what  ground  could  a  just  and  reasonable  man 
quarrel  with  or  repine  at  the  issue  ?  And  supposing  that  a 

Eerverse  and  subtle  ingenuity  in  his  legal  advisers  could 
ave  devised  means  for  delaying  his  surrender  of  the  prop- 
erty to  him  who  had  been  solemnly  declared  its  true  owner, 
what  real  and  ultimate  advantage  could  he  have  obtained  by 


406  TEN  THOUSAND  A-YEAR. 

such  a  dishonorable  line  of  conduct  ?  Could  the  spirit  of  the 
Christian  religion  tolerate  the  bare  idea  of  it?  Could  such 
purposes  or  intentions  consist  for  one  instant  with  the  con- 
sciousness that  the  awful  eye  of  God  was  always  upon  every 
thought  of  his  mind,  every  feeling  of  his  heart,  every  purpose 
of  his  will  ?  A  thorough  and  lively  conviction  of  God's  moral 
government  of  the  world  secured  him  a  happy  composure — a 
glorious  and  immovable  resolution ;  it  enabled  him  to  form 
a  true  estimate  of  things ;  it  extracted  the  sting  from  grief 
and  regret ;  it  dispelled  the  gloom  that  would  otherwise  have 
settled  portentously  upon  the  future.  Thus  he  had  not  for- 
gotten the  exhortation  which  spoke  unto  him,  as  unto  a  child  ; 
My  son,  despise  not  thouthe  chastening  of  the  Lord,  nor  faint 
when  thou  art  rebuked  of  Him.  And  if,  indeed,  religion  had 
not  done  this  for  Mr.  Aubrey,  what  could  it  have  done,  what 
would  it  have  been  worth  ?  It  would  have  been  that  indeed 
which  dull  fools  suppose  it — a  mere  name,  a  melancholy  de- 
lusion. What  hopeless  and  lamentable  imbecility  would  it 
not  have  argued,  to  have  acknowledged  the  reality  and  in- 
fluence of  religion  in  the  hour  of  prosperity — and  to  have 
doubted,  distrusted,  or  denied  it  in  the  hour  of  adversity  ? 
When  a  child  beholds  the  sun  obscured  by  the  dark  clouds, 
he  may  think,  in  his  simplicity,  that  it  is  gone  forever ;  but  a 
MAN  knows  that  behind  is  the  sun,  glorious  as  ever,  and  the 
next  moment,  the  clouds  having  rolled  away,  its  glorious 
warmth  and  light  are  again  upon  the  earth.  Thus  is  it, 
thought  Aubrey  with  humble  but  cheerful  confidence,  with 
the  Almighty— who  hath  declared  himself  the  Father  of  the 
spirits  of  all  flesh — 

"  Behind  a  frowning  Providence 

He  hides  a  smiling  face! 
Blind  unbelief  is  sure  to  err, 

And  scan  his  works  in  vain! 
God  is  his  own  interpreter, 

And  he  will  make  it  plain! " 

"  Therefore,  O  my  God !  "  thought  Aubrey,  as  he  gazed  upon 
the  lovely  scenes  familiar  to  him  from  his  birth,  and  from 
which  a  few  short  hours  were  to  separate  him  forever,  "  I  do 
acknowledge  Thy  hand  in  what  has  befallen  me,  and  Thy 
mercy  which  enables  me  to  bear  it,  as  from  Thee."  The 
scene  around  him  was  ti'anquil  and  beautiful — inexpressibly 
beautiful.  He  stood  under  the  shadow  of  a  mighty  elm-tree, 
the  last  of  a  long  and  noble  avenue,  which  he  had  been  pac- 
ing in  deep  thought  for  upwards  of  an  hour.  The  ground 
Avas  considerably  elevated  above  the  level  of  the  rest  of  the 
park.  No  sound  disturbed  the  serene  repose  of  the  approach- 
ing evening,  except  the  distant  and  gradually  diminishing 
sounds  issuing  from  an  old  rookery,  and  the  faint  low  bub- 
bling of  a  clear  streamlet  that  flowed  not  far  from  where  he 


TEN  THOUSAND  A-YEAE.  407 


xl.    Here  and  there,  under  the  deepening  shadows  cast  by 
lofty  trees,  might  be  seen  the  glancing  forms  of  deer,  the 

v    li\rt>    f.ninora    \7iciKla        "  T  ifo  "    c<jirl      AnVvroir    fr\    \\ i m D olf 


stood, 
the 

only  live  things  visible.  "Life,"  said  Aubrey  to  himself, 
with  a  sigh,  as  ne  leaned  against  the  trunk  of  the  grand  ola 
tree  under  which  he  stood,  and  gazed  with  a  fond  and  mourn- 
ful eye  on  the  lovely  scenes  stretching  before  him,  to  which 
the  subdued  radiance  of  the  departing  sunlight  communicat- 
ed a  tone  of  tender  pensiyeness  ;  "  life  is,  in  truth,  what  the 
Scriptures — what  the  voice  of  nature — represents  it — a  long 
journey,  during  which  the  traveller  stops  at  many  resting- 
places.  Some  of  them  are  more,  others  less  beautiful ;  from 
some  he  parts  with  more,  from  others  with  less  regret ;  but 
part  he  must,  and  pursue  his  journey,  though  he  may  often 
turn  back  to  gaze  with  lingering  fondness  and  admiration  at 
the  scene  he  has  last  quitted.  The  next  stage  may  be — as  all 
his  journey  might  have  been — bleak  and  desolate  ;  but  through 
that  he  is  only  passing ;  he  will  not  be  condemned  to  stay  in 
it,  as  he  was  not  permitted  to  dwell  in  the  other ;  he  is  still 
journeying  on,  along  a  route  which  he  cannot  mistake,  to  the 
point  of  his  destination,  his  journey's  end— the  shores  of 
the  vast,  immeasurable,  boundless  ocean  of  eternity  —  HIS 
HOME  ! " 

The  deepening  shadows  of  evening  warned  him  to  retrace 
his  steps  to  the  Hall.  Before  quitting  the  spot  upon  which 
he  had  been  so  long  standing,  he  turned  his  head  a  little  to- 
wards the  right,  to  take  a  last  view  of  an  obiect  which  called 
forth  tender  and  painful  feeling— it  was  the  old  sycamore  which 
his  sister's  intercession  had  saved  from  the  axe.  There  it 
stood,  feeble  and  venerable  object !  its  leafless  silvery-gray 
branches  becoming  dim  and  indistinct,  yet  contrasting  touch- 
ingly  with  the  verdant  strength  of  those  by  its  side.  A  neat 
strong  fence  had  been  placed  around  it;  but  how  much 
longer  would  it  receive  such  care  and  attention?  Aubrey 
thought  of  the  comparison  which  had  been  made  by  his  sister, 
and  sighed  as  he  looked  his  last  at  the  old  tree,  and  then 
slowly  walked  on  towards  the  Hall.  When  about  halfway 
down  the  avenue,  he  beheld  two  figures  apparently  approach- 
ing him,  but  undistinguishable  in  the  gloom  and  the  distance. 
As  they  nearedhim,  he  recognized  Lord  De  la  Zouch  and  Mr. 
Delamere.  Suspecting  the  object  of  their  visit,  which  a  little 
surprised  him,  since  they  had  taken  a  final  leave,  and  a  very 
affecting  one,  the  day  before,  he  felt  a  little  anxiety  and  em- 
barrassment. Nor  was  he  entirely  mistaken.  Lord  De  la 
Zouch,  who  advanced  alone  towards  Aubrey— Mr.  Delamere 
turning  back— most  seriously  pressed  his  son's  suit  for  the 
hand  of  Miss  Aubrey,  as  he  had  of  ten  done  before  ;  declaring, 
that  though  undoubtedly  he  wished  a  year  or  two  first  to 
elapse,  during  which  his  son  might  complete  his  studies  at 
Oxford,  there  was  no  object  dearer  to  the  heart  of  Lady  De 
la  Zouch  and  himself,  than  to  see  Miss  Aubrey  become  their 
daughter-in-law.  "  Where,"  said  Lord  De  la  Zouch,  with; 


408  TEN  THOUSAND  A-YEAR. 

much  energy,  "  is  he  to  look  elsewhere  for  such  a  union  of 
beauty,  of  accomplishments,  of  amiability,  of  high-minded- 
ness  ?'"  After  a  great  deal  of  animated  conversation  on  this 
subject,  during  which  Mr.  Aubrey  assured  Lord  De  la  Zouch. 
that  he  would  say  everything  which  he  honorably  could  to  in- 
duce his  sister  to  entertain,  or  at  all  events,  not  to  discard  the 
suit  of  Delamere ;  at  the  same  time  reminding  him  of  the 
firmness  of  her  character,  and  the  hopelessness  of  attempting 
to  change  any  determination  to  which  she  had  been  led  by 
her  sense  of  delicacy  and  honor.— Lord  De  la  Zouch  addressed 
himself  in  a  very  earnest  manner  to  matters  more  immedi- 
ately relating  to  the  personal  interests  of  Mr.  Aubrey ;  enter- 
ed with  lively  anxiety  into  all  his  future  plans  and  purposes  ; 
and  once  more  pressed  upon  him  the  acceptance  of  most 
munificent  offers  of  pecuniary  assistance,  which,  with  many 
fervent  expressions  of  gratitude?  Aubrey  again  declined.  But 
he  pledged  himself  to  communicate  freely  with  Lord  De  la 
Zouch,  in  the  event  of  an  occasion  arising  for  such  assistance 
as  his  lordship  had  already  so  generously  volunteered.  By 
this  time  Mr.  Delamere  had  joined  them,  regarding  Mr.  Au- 
brey with  infinite  earnestness  and  apprehension.  All,  how- 
ever, he  said,  was — and  in  a  hurried  manner  to  his  father — 
"  My  mother  has  sent  me  to  say  that  she  is  waiting  for  you 
in  the  carriage,  and  wishes  that  we  should  immediately 
return."  Lord  De  la  Zouch  and  his  son  again  took  leave  of 
Mr.  Aubrey.  "  Remember,  my  dear  Aubrey,  remember  the 
pledges  you  have  repeated  this  evening,"  said  the  former. 

I  do,  I  will !  "  replied  Mr.  Aubrey,  as  they  each  wrung  his 
hands ;  and  then,  having  grasped  those  of  Lady  De  la  Zouch, 
who  sat  within  the  carriage  powerfully  affected,  the  door  was 
shut :  and  they  were  quickly  borne  away  from  the  presence 
and  the  residence  of  their  afflicted  friends.  \Yhile  Mr.  Au- 
brey stood  gazing  after  them,  with  folded  arms,  in  an  attitude 
of  melancholy  abstraction,  at  the  hall  door,  he  was  accosted 
by  Dr.  Tatham,  who  had  come  to  him  from  the  library,  where 
he  had  been,  till  a  short  time  before,  busily  engaged  reducing 
into  writing  various  matters  which  had  been  the  subject  of 
conversation  between  himself  Mr.  Aubrey  during  the  day. 

"  I  am  afraid,  my  dear  friend,"  said  the  Doctor,  "  that  there 
is  a  painful  but  interesting  scene  awaiting  you.  You  will 
not,  I  am  sure,  forbear  to  gratify,  by  your  momentary  presence 
in  the  servants'  hall,  a  body  01  your  tenantry,  who  are  there 
assembled,  having  come  to  pay  you  their  parting  respects." 

"  I  would  really  rather  be  spared  the  painful  scene,"  said 
Mr.  Aubrey  with  emotion,  "  I  am  nearly  unnerved  as  it  is ! 
Cannot  you  bid  them  adieu,  in  my  name,  and  say,  God  bless 
them !  " 

"  You  must  come,  my  dear  friend  !  If  it  be  painful,  it  will 
be  but  for  a  moment;  and  the  recollection  of  their  hearty 
and  humble  expressions  of  affection  and  respect  will  be 
pleasant  hereafter.  Poor  souls  !  "  he  added,  with  not  a  little 


TEN  THOUSAND  A-YEAE.  409 

emotion,  "  you  should  see  how  crowded  is  Mr.  Griffiths' 
room  with  the  presents  they  have  each  brought  you,  and 
which  would  surely  keep  your  whole  establishment  for 
months !— Cheeses,  tongues,  nams,  bacon,  and  I  know  not 
what  beside ! " 

"  Come,  Doctor,"  said  Mr.  Aubrey  quickly,  and  with 
evidently  a  great  effort,  "  I  will  see  them,  my  humble  and 
worthy  friends!  it  it  be  for  but  a  moment;  but  1  would 
rather  have  been  spared  the  scene."  He  followed  Dr.  Tatham 
into  the  large  servants'  hall,  which  he  found  nearly  filled  by 
some  forty  or  fifty  of  his  late  tenantry,  who,  as  he  entered, 
rose  in  troubled  silence  to  receive  him.  There  were  lights, 
by  which  a  hurried  glance  sufficed  to  show  him  the  deep 
sorrow  visible  in  their  countenances.  "Well, '  sir,"  "com- 
menced one  of  them  after  a  moment's  hesitation— he  seemed 
to  have  been  chosen  the  spokesman  of  those  present — "  we've 
come  to  tak'  our  leave ;  and  a  sad  time  it  be  for  all  of  us,  and 
it  may  be,  sir,  for  you."  He  paused,  and  added  abruptly— 
"  I  thought  I  could  have  said  a  word  or  two,  sir,  in  the  name 
of  all  of  us,  but  I've  clean  forgotten  all ;  and  I  wish  we  could 
all  forget  that  we  were  come  to  part  with  you,  sir ;— but  we 
sha'n't— no,  never ! — we  shall  never  see  your  like  again,  sir ! 
God  help  you,  sir ! "  Again  he  paused,  and  struggled  hard 
to  conceal  his  emotions.  Then  he  tried  to  say  something 
further,  but  his  voice  failed  him. 

"  Squire,  it  may  be  law;  but  it  be  not  justice,  we  all  do 
think,  that  hath  taken  Yatton  from  you,  that  was  born  to 
it,"  said  one,  who  stood  next  to  him  that  had  first  spoke. 
"  Who  ever  heard  o'  a  scratch  in  a  bit  o'  paper  signifying  the 
loss  o'  so  much  ?  It  never  were  heard  of  afore,  sir,  an'  can- 
not be  right ! " 

"•  You'll  forgive  me,  Squire,"  said  another,  "  but  we  shall 
never  tak'  to  t  new  one  that's  coming  after  you !  " 

"  My  worthy,  my  dear  friends,"  commenced  Mr.  Aubrey, 
with  melancholy  and  forced  composure,  as  he  stood  beside 
Dr.  Tatham,"  this  is  a  sad  scene— one  which  I  had  not 
expected.  I  am  quite  unprepared  for  it.  I  have  had  lately 
to  go  through  many  very  painful  scenes;  but  few  more  so 
than  the  present.  My  dear  friends,  I  can  only  say  from  my 
heart,  God  bless  you  all !  I  shall  never  forget  you,  whom  1 
have  always  respected,  and  indeed  been  very  proud  of,  as 
my  tenantry,  and  whom  I  now,  of  course,  look  at  as  my 
friends  only.  We  shall  never  forget  you — 

"  Lord  Almighty  bless  you,  sir,  and  Madam,  and  Miss,  and 
little  Miss— and  the  little  squire ! "  said  a  voice,  in  a  vehement 
manner,  from  amidst  the  throng,  in  tones  that  went  to  Mr. 
Aubrey's  heart.  His  lips  quivered,  and  he  ceased  speaking 
for  some  moments.  At  length  he  resumed. 

"  You  see  my  feelings  are  a  little  shaken  by  the  sufferings 
I  have  gone  through,  I  have  only  a  word  more  to  say  to 
you.  Providence  has  seen  fit,  my  friends,  to  deprive  me  of 


410  TEN  THOUSAND  A-TEAli. 

that  which  I  had  deemed  to  be  my  birth-right.  God  is  good 
and  wise ;  and  I  bow,  as  we  must  all  bow,  to  His  will,  with 
reverence  and  resignation.  And  also,  my  dear  friends,  let 
us  always  submit  cheerfully  to  the  laws  under  which  we 
live.  We  must  not  quarrel  with  their  decision,  merely  be- 
cause it  happens  to  be  adverse  to  our  own  wishes.  I,  from 
my  heart — and  so  must  you,  from  yours — acknowledge  a 
firm,  unshaken  allegiance  to  the  laws ;  they  are  ordained  by 
God,  and  He  demands  our  obedience  to  them !  "  He  paused. 
"  I  have  to  thank  you,"  he  presently  added,  in  a  subdued 
tone,  "  my  worthy  friends,  for  many  substantial  tokens  of 
your  good  will  which  you  have  brought  with  you  this  even- 
ing. I  assure  you  sincerely,  that  I  value  them  tar  more  " — he 
paused,  and  it  was  some  moments  before  he  could  proceed— 
"  than  if  they  had  been  of  the  most  costly  kind." 

"  Lord,  only  hearken  to  t'  squire ! "  called  out  a  voice,  as 
if  on  an  impulse  of  eager  affection,  which  its  rough,  honest 
speaker  could  not  resist.  This  seemed  entirely  to  deprive 
Mr.  Aubrey  of  the  power  of  utterance,  and  he  turned  sud- 
denly towards  Dr.  Fathom  with  an  overflowing  eye  and  a 
convulsive  quivering  of  the  lips  that  showed  the  powerful 
emotions  with  which  he  was  contending.  The  next  moment 
he  stepped  forward  and  shook  hands  with  those  nearest. 
He  was  quickly  surrounded,  and  every  one  present  grasped 
his  hands,  scarcely  any  of  them  able  to  utter  more  than  a 
brief  but  ardent  "  God  bless  you,  sir !  " 

"  I  am  sure,  my  friends,"  said  Dr.  Tatham,  almost  as  much 
affected  as  any  of  them,  "  that  you  cannot  wish  to  prolong  so 
affecting,  so  distressing  a  scene.  Mr.  Aubrey  is  much  ex- 
hausted, and  has  a  long  journey  to  take  early  in  the  morning 
— and  you  had  better  now  leave." 

"  Farewell !  farewell,  my  kind  and  dear  friends,  farewell ! 
— May  God  bless  you  all,  and  all  your  families ! "  said  Mr. 
Aubrey,  and,  most  powerfully  affected,  withdrew  from  a 
scene  which  he  was  not  likely  ever  to  forget.  He  retired, 
accompanied  by  Dr.  Tatham,  to  his  library,  where  Mr.  Grif- 
fiths, his  steward,  was  in  readiness  to  receive  his  signature 
to  various  documents.  This  done,  the  steward,  after  a  few 
hurried  expressions  of  affection  and  respect,  withdrew  ;  and 
Mr.  Aubrey  had  completed  all  the  arrangements,  and  trans- 
acted all  the  business  which  had  required  his  attention 
before  quitting  Yatton,  which,  at  an  early  hour  in  the  morn- 
ing, he  was  going  to  leave,  and  go  direct  to  London,  instead 
of  accepting  any  of  the  numerous  offers  which  he  had  receiv- 
ed from  his  friends  in  the  neighborhood  to  take  up  with  them 
his  abode  for,  at  all  events,  some  considerable  period. 
That,  howeverj  would  have  been  entirely  inconsistent  with 
the  plans  for  his  future  life,  which  he  had  formed  and  matur- 
ed. He  left  the  whole  estate  in  admirable  order  and  condi- 
ti9n.  There  was  not  a  farm  vacant,  not  a  tenant  dissatisfied 
with  the  terms  under  which  he  held.  Every  document,  all 


TEN  THOUSAND  A-TEAR.  411 

the  accounts  connected  with  the  estate,  after  having  been 
carefully  examined  by  Mr.  Parkinson,  and  Mr.  Aubrey,  and 
Mr.  Griffiths,  was  in  readiness  for  the  most  scrupulous  and 
searching  investigation  on  the  part  of  Mr.  Aubrey's  successor 
and  his  agents. 

Mr.Aubrey's  library  was  already  carefully  packed  up,  and 
was  to  follow  him  on  the  ensuing  day,  to  London,  by  water ; 
as  also  were  several  portions  of  the  furniture— the  residue  of 
which  was  to  be  sold  off  within  a  day  or  two's  time.  How  diffi- 
cult—how very  difficult  had  it  been  for  them  to  choose  which 
articles  they  would  part  with,  and  which  retain !  The  favor- 
ite old  high-backed  easy-chair  which  had  been  worked  by 
Miss  Aubrey  herself;  the  beautiful  ebony  cabinet,  which 
had  been  given  by  her  father  to  her  mother,  who  had  given 
it  to  Kate ;  the  little  chairs  of  Charles  and  Agnes,— and  in 
which  Mr.  Aubrey  and  Kate,  and  all  their  brothers  and 
sisters,  had  sat  when  children  ;  Mrs.  Aubrey's  piano ;  these, 
and  a  few  other  articles,  had  been  successfully  pleaded  for 
by  Mrs.  Aubrey  and  Kate,  and  were  to  accompany,  or  rather 
follow  them  to  London,  instead  of  passing,  by  the  auctioneer's 
hammer,  into  the  hands  of  strangers.  The  two  old  carriage- 
horses,  which  had  drawn  old  Mrs.  Aubrey  in  the  family  coach 
for  many  years,  were  to  be  turned  to  grass  for  the  rest  of 
their  days  at  Lady  Stratton's.  Poor  old  Peggy  was,  in  like 
manner,  to  have  to  herself  a  little  field  belonging  to  Dr. 
Tatham.  Little  Charles'  pony,  a  beautiful  animal,  and  most 
reluctantly  parted  with,  was  sent  as  a  present,  in  his  name,  to 
Sir  Harry  Oldfield,  one  of  his  playfellows.  Hector,  the 
magnificent  Newfoundland  dog,  was,  at  the  vehement  in- 
stance of  Pumpkin,  the  gardener,  who  almost  went  on  his 
knees  to  beg  for  the  animal,  and  declared  that  he  loved  the 
creature  like  a  son— as  I  verily  believe  he  did,  for  they  were 
inseparable,  and  their  attachment  was  mutual— given  up  to 
him,  on  his  solemn  promise  to  take  great  care  of  him.  Then 
there  was  a  poor  animal  that  they  hardly  knew  how  to  dispose 
of.  It  was  a  fine  old  favorite  staghound,  stone-blind,  quite 
gray  about  the  head,  and  so  very  feeble,  that  it  could  but 
just  cra\yl  in  and  out  of  its  commodious  kennel,  and  lie 
basking  in  the  genial  sunshine  ;  wagging  his  tail  when  any 
one  spoke  to  it,  and  affectionately  licking  the  hand  that  pat- 
ted it.  Thus  had  it  treated  Mr.  Aubrey  that  very  morning 
as  he  stood  by,  and  stooped  down  to  caress  it  for^  the  last 
time.  It  was,  at  his  earnest  request,  assigned  to  Dr.  Tatham, 
kennel  and  all ;  indeed  the  worthy  little  Doctor  would  have 
filled  his  premises  in  a  similar  way,  byway  of  having  "keep- 
sakes" and  "memorials"  of  his  friends.  Miss  Aubreys 
beautiful  little  Marlborough  spaniel,  with  its  brilliant  black 
eyes  and  long  glossy  graceful  ears,  was  to  accompany  her  to 
London. 

As  for  the  servants— the  houskeeper  was  going  to  keep  the 
house  of  her  brother,  a  widower,  at  Grilston,  and  the  butler 


412  TEN  THOUSAND  A-TEAR. 

was  going  to  marry  and  quit  service ;  and  for  the  rest,  Mr. 
Parkinson  had,  at  Mr.  Aubrey's  desire,  written  about  them 
to  Messrs.  Quirk,  Gammon,  and  Snap ;  and  Mr.  Gammon 
had  sent  word  that  such  of  the  establishment  as  chose  might 
continue  at  Yatton,  at  all  events  till  the  pleasure  of  Mr.  Tit- 
mouse, upon  the  subject,  should  have  been  known.  All  the  ser- 
vants had  received  a  quarter's  wages  that  morning  from  Mr. 
[Griffiths,  in  the  presence  of  Mr.  Aubrey,  who  spoke  kindly  to 
(each,  and  earnestly  recommended  them  to  conduct  them- 
selves respectfully  towards  his  successor.  Scarce  any  of 
them  could  answer  him,  otherwise  than  by  an  humble  DOW 
or  curtsey,  accompanied  by  sobs  and  tears.  One  of  them  did 
contrive  to  speak,  and  passionately  expressed  a  wish  that  the 
first  morsel  Mr.  Titmouse  eat  in  the  house  might  choke  him 
—a  sally  which  received  so  very  grave  a  rebuke  from  Mr. 
Aubrey,  as  brought  the  hasty  offender  to  her  knees  begging 
forgiveness,  which,  I  need  hardly  say,  she  received,  with  a 
very  kind  admonition.  Many  of  them  most  vehemently  en- 
treated to  be  allowed  to  accompany  Mr.  Aubrey  and  his 
family  to  London,  and  continue  in  their  service,  but  in  vain. 
Mr.  Aubrey  had  made  his  selection,  having  taken  only  his 
own  valet,  and  Mrs.  Aubrey's  maid,  and  one  of  the  nursery- 
maids, and  declaring  that  on  no  consideration  would  he 
think  of  being  accompanied  by  any  other  of  the  servants. 

There  were  some  twenty  or  thirty  poor  old  infirm  cottagers, 
men  and  women,  who  had  been  for  years  weekly  pensioners 
on  the  bounty  of  Yatton,  and  respecting  whom  Mr.  Aubrey 
felt  a  painful  anxiety.  What  could  he  do  ?  He  gave  the 
sum  or  fifty  pounds  to  Dr.  Tatham  for  their  use ;  and  re- 
quested him  to  press  their  claims  earnestly  upon  the  new 
proprietor  of  Yatton.  He  also  wrote  almost  as  many  letters 
as  there  were  of  these  poor  people,  on  their  behalf,  to  his 
friends  and  neighbors.  Oh,  it  was  a  moving  scene  that 
occurred  at  each  of  their  little  cottages,  when  their  benefac- 
tors, Mr.  Aubrey,  his  wife,  and  sister,  severally  called  to  bid 
them  farewell,  and  receive  their  humble  and  tearful  bless- 
ings !  But  it  was  the  parting  with  her  school,  which  neither 
,  she  nor  her  brother  saw  any  probability  of  being  kept  up 
longer  than  for  a  month  or  two  after  their  departure,  that 
occasioned  Kate  the  greatest  distress.  There  were  several 
reasons,  which  will  occur  to  the  reader,  why  no  application 
should  be  made  about  the  matter  from  her,  or  on  her  account, 
to  Mr.  Titmouse,  even  if  she  had  not  had  reason  to  antici- 
pate, from  what  she  had  heard  of  his  character,  that  he  was 
not  a  person  to  feel  any  interest  in  such  an  institution.  Nor 
had  she  liked  to  trouble  or  burden  the  friends  she  left  behind 
her  with  the  responsibility  of  supporting  and  superintending 
her  little  establishment.  She  had  nothing  for  it,  therefore, 
but  to  prepare  the  mistress  and  her  scholars  for  the  break- 
ing up  of  the  school,  within  a  month  of  her  departure  from 
Yatton.  She  gave  the  worthy  woman,  the  mistress,  a  pres« 


TEN  THOUSAND  A-YEAR.  413 

ent  of  a  five-pound  note,  and  five  shillings  a-piece  to  each  of 
the  children.  She  felt  quite  unequal  to  the  task  of  person- 
ally taking  leave  of  them,  as  she  had  intended,  and  several 
times  attempted.  She  therefore,  with  many  tears,  wrote  the 
following  lines,  and  gave  them  to  Dr.  Tatham  to  read  aloud 
in  the  school,  when  their  good  and  beautiful  writer  should 
be  far  on  her  way  towards  London.  The  little  Doctor  paused 
a  good  many  times  while  he  read  it,  and  complained  of  his 
glasses. 

"  My  dear  little  girls,— You  know  that  I  have  already  bid 
each  of  you  good-bye  ;  and  though  I  tried  to  say  something 
to  all  of  you  at  once,  I  was  not  able,  because  I  was  so  sorry 
to  part  with  you,  and  tell  you  that  my  little  school  must  be 
given  up.  So  I  have  written  these  few  lines  to  tell  you  that  I 
love  you  all,  and  have  tried  to  be  a  good  friend  to  you.  Be 
sure  not  to  forget  your  spelling  and  reading,  and  your 
needle.  Your  mothers  have  promised  to  hear  you  say  your 
catechisms  ;  you  must  also  be  sure  to  say  your  prayers,  and 
to  read  your  Bibles,  and  to  behave  very  seriously  at  church, 
and  to  be  always  dutiful  to  your  parents.  Then  God  will 
bless  you  all !  I  hope  you  will  not  forget  us,  for  we  shall 
often  think  of  you  when  we  are  a  great  way  off ;  and  Dr. 
Tatham  will  now  and  then  write  and  tell  us  how  you  are 
^oing  on.  Farewell,  my  dear  little  girls  ;  and  may  God  bless 
and  preserve  you  all!  This  is  the  prayer  of  both  of  us—- 
Mrs. Aubrey  and 

"  CATHARINE  AUBREY. 

"  Yatton,  loth  May.  18—." 

The  above  was  n9t  written  in  the  uniform  and  beautiful 
hand  usual  with  Miss  Aubrey ;  it  was,  on  the  contrary,  rath- 
er irregular,  and  evidently  written  hastily ;  but  Dr.  Tatham 
preserved  it  to  the  day  of  his  death,  and  always  thought  it 
beautiful. 

On  the  ensuing  morning,  at  a  very  early  hour,  Dr.  latham 
left  the  vicarage  to  pay  his  last  visit  to  friends  whom  it  al- 
most broke  his  heart  to  part  with,  in  all  human  probability 
forever  He  started,  but  on  a  moment's  reflection  ceased 
to  be  surprised  at  the  sight  of  Mr.  Aubrey  approaching 
him  from  the  direction  of  the  little  churchyard.  He  was 
calm,  but  his  countenance  bore  the  traces  of  very  recent 
emotion.  They  greeted  each  other  in  silence,  and  so 
walked  on  for  some  time,  arm  in  arm,  slowly  towards  the 
Hall.  It  was  a  dull  heavy  morning,  almost  threatening 
rain.  The  air  seemed  full  of  oppression.  The  only  sounds 
audible  were  the  hoarse  clamorous  sounds  issuing  from  the 
old  rookery,  at  some  distance  on  their  left.  They  _  inter- 
changed but  few  words  as  they  walked  along  the  winding 
pathway  to  the  Hall.  The  first  thing  that  attracted  their 
eyes  on  passing  under  the  gateway,  was  the  large  old  family 


414  TEN  THOUSAND  A-YEAE. 

carriage  standing  opposite  the  Hall  door,  where  stood  some 
luggage,  sufficient  for  the  journey,  ready  to  be  placed  upon 
it ;  the  remainder  having  been  sent  on  the  day  before  to 
London.  They  were  all  up  and  dressed.  The  children  were  tak- 
ing their  last  breakfast  in  the  nursery ;  Charles  making  many 
inquiries  of  the  weening  servants,  which  they  could  answer 
only  by  tears  and  kisses.  In  vain  was  the  breakfast-table 
spread  for  the  senior  travellers.  There  sat  poor  Kate,  in 
travelling  trim,  before  the  antique  silver  urn,  attempting  to 
perform,  with  tremulous  hand,  her  accustomed  office  ;  but 
neither  she  nor  Mrs.  Aubrey  was  equal  to  the  task  ;  which, 
summoning  the  housekeeper  into  the  room,  they  devolved 
upon  her,  and  which  she  performed  in  perturbed  silence. 
Mr.  Aubrey  and  Dr.  Tatham  were  standing  there  ;  but  nei- 
ther of  them  spoke.  A  short  time  before,  Mr.  Aubrey  had 
requested  the  servants  to  be  summoned,  as  usual,  to  morning 
prayer,  in  the  accustomed  room,  and  requested  Dr.  Tatham  to 
officiate.  As  soon,  however,  as  the  sorrowful  little  assem- 
blage was  collected  before  him,  he  whispered  to  Mr.  Aubrey 
that  he  felt  unequal  to  go  through  the  duty  with  the  com- 
posure it  required ;  and  after  a  pause,  he  said,  "  Let  us  kneel 
down ; "  and  in  a  low  voice,  often  interrupted  by  his  own 
emotions,  and  the  sobs  of  those  around  him,  he  read,  with 
touching  simplicity  and  solemnity,  the  ninety-first  psalm  ; 
adding  the  Lord's  prayer,  and  a  benediction. 

The  bicter  preparations  for  starting  at  an  early  hour,  seven 
o'clock,  were  soon  afterwards  completed.  Half  smothered 
with  the  kisses  and  caresses  of  the  affectionate  servants,  lit- 
tle Charles  and  Agnes  were  already  seated  in  the  carriage, 
on  the  laps  of  their  two  attendants,  exclaiming,  "Come, 
papa !  come,  mamma !  the  horses  are  ready  to  start !  "  Just 
then,  poor  Pumpkin  the  gardener,  scarce  able  to  speak,  made 
his  appearance,  nis  arms  full  of  nosegays,  which  he  had  been 
culling  for  the  last  two  hours— having  one  a  piece  for  every 
one  of  the  travellers,  servants,  and  children,  and  all.  The 
loud  angry  bark  of  Hector  was  heard  from  time  to  time,  lit- 
tle Charles  calling  loudly  for  him;  but  Pumpkin  had  fasten- 
ed him  up,  for  fear  of  his  starting  off  after  the  carriage.  At 
length,  scarce  having  tasted  breakfast,  the  travellers  made 
their  appearance  at  the  Hall  door.  Kate  and  Mrs.  Au- 
brey were  utterly  overcome  at  the  sight  of  the  carriage,  and 
wept  bitterly.  They  threw  their  arms  passionately  around, 
and  kissed  their  venerable  friend  and  pastor,  Dr.  Tatham, 
who  was  but  little  less  agitated  than  themselves.  Then  they 
tore  themselves  from  him,  and  hastity  got  into  the  carriage. 
As  he  stood  alone,  bareheaded,  on  their  quitting  him,  he  lift- 
ed  his  hands,  but  could  scarce  utter  a  parting  benediction.  Mr. 
Aubrey,  with  a  flushed  cheek  and  a  quivering  lip,  then 
grasped  his  hand,  whispering,  "  Farewell,  my  dear  and  ven- 
erable friend !  Farewell !  "  "  The  Lord  God  of  thy  fathers 
bless  thee ! "  murmured  Dr.  Tatham,  clasping  Mr.  Aubrey's 


TEN  THOUSAND  A-TEAE.  415 

hand  in  both  of  his  own,  and  looking  solemnly  upward.  Mr. 
Aubrey,  taking  off  his  hat,  turned  towards  him  an  unut- 
terable look,  then  waving  his  hand  to  the  group  of  agitated 
servants  that  stood  within  and  without  the  door,  he  stepped 
into  the  carriage  ;  the  door  was  shut ;  and  they  rolled  slowly 
away.  Outside  the  park  gates  were  collected  more  than  a 
hundred  people  to  bid  them  farewell— all  the  men,  when  the 
carriage  came  in  sight,  taking  off  their  hats.  The  carriage 
stopped  for  a  moment.  "  God  bless  you  all !  God  bless  you  T" 
exclaimed  Mr.  Aubrey  waving  his  hand,  whilst  from  each 
window  was  extended  the  white  hand  of  Kate  and  Mrs.  Au- 
brey, which  was  fervently  kissed  and  shaken  by  those  who 
were  nearest.  Again  the  carriage  moved  on  ;  and  quicken- 
ing their  speed,  the  horses  soon  bore  them  out  of  the  village. 
Within  less  than  half  an  hour  afterwards,  the  tearful  eyes  of 
the  travellers,  as  they  passed  a  familiar  turning  of  the  road, 
had  looked  their  last  on  Yatton? 


CHAPTER  XVIII. 

NOTE. — The  following  paragraph,  which  was  annexed  to 
Part  XI.  of  this  work,  in  IJlackwood's  Magazine  for  Septem- 
ber 1840,  the  author  ventures,  for  a  particular  reason,  to  re- 
tain in  this  the  separate  edition  : — 

Several  legal  topics  have  been  touched  upon  in  these  pa- 
pers, which  seem  to  have  attracted  some  little  attention 
amongst  professional  readers,  as  at  least,  would  appear  from 
various  communications— some  at  considerable  length,  some 
anonymous,  others  not— addressed,  through  the  publishers, 
to ''  The  Author  of  Ten  Thousand  a-Year,  in  Blackwood's 
Magazine."  The  principal  matters  thus  discussed  are,  the 
power  of  an  heir,  in  the  lifetime  of  his  ancestor,  (to  speak  pop- 
ularly, though  not  with  legal  accuracy,  since  nemo  est 
hceres  viventis,}  to  convey  away  his  expectancy  in  fee,  so  as  to 
bind  himself,  and  those  claiming  under  him,  by  estoppel  on  the 
subsequent  descent  of  the  estate.  On  this  point  have  been  re- 
ceived several  communications — one  of  which  (from  a  great 
lawyer)  opposes  the  doctrine  laid  down  in  the  text.  'Tis 
doubtless  an  important  point ;  and  where  doctors  differ  I  am 
not  presumptuous  enough  to  volunteer  an  opinion.  The  other 
which  seems  principally  to  have  attracted  attention,  is 
the  effect  given  by  Lord  Widdrington,  C.J.,  at  the  trial,  (in 
which  he  is  represented  as  being  subsequently  confirmed  by 
the  decision  of  the  Court  of  King's  Bench,)  to  the  ERASURE  in 
the  deed  of  confirmation.  From  two  letters  I  learn  that  one 
or  two  clients  of  the  writers  of  them  have  conceived  great 
alarm  on  this  subject,  and  have  actually  directed  all  their 
title-deeds  to  be  overhauled,  and,  in  case  of  an  erasure  being 


416  TEN  THOUSAND  A-YEAE. 

discovered,  submitted  to  eminent  counsel  !  Such  erasures 
have  been  discovered,  it  would  seem,  in  two  instances. 
In  one  the  counsel  differed  from  Lord  Widdrington;  in 
the  other,  agreed  with  him.  The  question,  then,  here  is, 
Whether,  when  an  ancient  deed  (i,  e.  upwards  of  thirty  years 
old,  after  which  period  a  deed  is  said  to  prove  itself)  is  pro- 
duced from  the  proper  custody  in  support  of  the  rights  of 
the  party  producing  it,  and  there  proves  to  be  an  erasure  I 
in  it  in  an  essential  part  of  the  deed  —  such  deed  ought  to  be 
rejected,  unless  the  erasure  can  be  accounted  for  ;  or  admit- 
ted upon  the  presumption  that  such  er  astir  e  occurred  before 
the  execution  of  the  deed?  Upon  this  point  I  confess  that  I 
have  formed  a  pretty  strong  opinion,  and  have  referred  again 
to  the  authorities  ;  and  venture  upon  the  whole,  to  give  in 
my  adhesion  to  the  opinion  of  Lord  Widdrington  and  his 
court—  although  two  papers  sent  to  me—  (one  of  them  very 
elaborate)  —  contest  that  opinion.  It  is  rather  singular  that, 
about  a  fortnight  ago,  Lord  Brougham,  in  delivering  the 
judgment  of  the  House  of  Lords  in  three  appeal  cases  from 
Scotland,  each  of  which  was  a  case  depending  upon  an  effect 
of  an  erasure,  expressly  declared  the  Scotch  law  to  be  to  the 
effect  laid  down  in  these  papers,  and  decided  accordingly, 
admitting,  at  the  same  time,  the  cases  to  be  full  of  grievous 
hardship  —  in  one  instance,  a  widow  losing  the  whole  of  the 
provision  which  had  been  made  for  her  by  her  deceased  hus- 
band. Whether  or  not  my  notions  of  the  existing  English 
law  on  this  subject  are  antiquated,  and  contrary  to  those  now 
entertained  by  the  profession,  I  leave  for  the  decision  of 
those  who  are  competent  to  form  an  opinion.—  As  for  several 
other  communications  of  a  different  nature  —  some  similarly, 
others  differently  addressed—  some  complimentary,  some  far 
otherwise,  and  insinuating  allusions  which  are  groundless, 
and  objects  which  have  no  existence—  surely,  on  consider- 
ation, the  authors  of  them  cannot  expect  any  answer,  nor  yet 
construe  silence  into  discourtesy  or  admission. 
Z<ondon,  \±th  August.  1840. 


Rank  is  very  apt  to  attract  and  dazzle  vulgar  and  feeble. 
optics  ;  and  the  knowledge  that  such  is  its  effect,  is  unspeak- 
ably gratifying  to  a  vain  and  ignorant  possessor  of  that  rank. 
Of  the  truth  of  one  part  of  this  observation,  take  as  an  illustra- 
tion the  case  of  Tittlebat  Titmouse  ;  of  the  other,  that  of  the 
Earl  of  Dreddlington.  The  former's  dinner  engagement  with 
the  latter,  his  august  and  awful  kinsman,  was  an  event  of 
such  magnitude  as  to  absorb  almost  all  his  faculties  in  the 
contemplation  of  it;  and  also  occasion  him  great  anxiety  in 
preparing  for  an  effective  appearance  upon  so  signal  an  oc- 
casion. Mr.  Gammon  had  repeatedly,  during  the  interval, 
instructed  his  anxious  pupil,  if  so  he  might  be  called,  as  to 
the  manner  in  which  he  ought  to  behave.  He  was—  Heaven 
gave  the  rnarkj  poor  Titmouse  !—  to  assume  an  air  of  mingled 


TEN  THOUSAND  A-YEAR.  417 

deference,  self-possession,  and  firmness ;  not  to  be  over-awed 
by  the  greatness  with  which  he  would  be  brought  into 
contact,  nor  unduly  elated  by  a  sense  of  his  own  suddenly 
acquired  importance.  He  was,  on  the  other  hand,  to  steer 
evenly  between  the  extremes  of  timorousness  and  temerity— 
to  aim  at  that  happy  mean,  so  grateful  to  those  able  to  ap- 
preciate the  effort  and  object  of  those  attaining  to  it.  Tit- 
mouse was  to  remember  that  great  as  was  the  Earl  of  Dred- 
dlington,  he  was  yet  but  a  maw— related,  too,  by  consanguinity 
to  him,  the  aforesaid  Titmouse,  who  might,  moreover 'before 
many  years  should  have  elapsed,  become  himself  Earl  of 
Dreddlington,  or  at  least  Lord  Drelincourt,  and  by  conse- 
quence equally  entitled,  with  the  present  possessor  of  that 
resplendent  position,  to  the  homage  of  mankind-.  At  the  same 
time  that  the  Earl's  advanced  years  gave  him  a  natural  claim 
to  the  respect  and  deference  of  his  young  kinsman— (whom, 
moreover,  he  was  nbout  to  introduce  into  the  sublime  re- 
gions of  aristocracy,  and  also  of  political  society)— Titmouse 
might  derive  a  few  ingredients  of  consolation  from  the  reflec- 
tion, that  his  income  probably  exceeded  by  a  third  that  of  the 
Earl  of  Dreddlington.  This  is  the  sum  of  Mr.  Gammon's 
general  instructions  to  his  eager  and  excited  pupil;  but  he 
also  gave  Titmouse  many  minor  hints  and  suggestions.  He 
was  to  drink  very  little  wine— (whereat  Titmouse  demurred 
somewhat  vehemently,  and  asked  "  How  the  d— 1  he  was  to 
get  his  steam  up  ?  ")— and  on  no  account  to  call  for  beer  or 
porter,  to  which  plebeian  beverages,  indeed  he  might  consider 
himself  as  having  bid  a  long  and  last  adieu  ;— to  say  "  my 
lord  "  and  "  your  lordship  "  in  addressing  the  Earl— and  "  your 
ladyship,"  in  addressing  Lady  Cecilia ;— and,  above  all,  never 
to  appear  in  a  hurry,  but  to  do  and  say  whatever  he  had  to  do 
and  to  say  calmly ;  for  that  the  nerves  of  aristocracy  were  very 
delicate,  and  could  not  bear  a  bustle,  or  the  slightest  display 
of  energy  or  feeling.  Then,  as  to  his  dress— Gammon,  feeling 
himself  treading  on  very  doubtful  ground,  intimated  merely 
that  the  essence  of  true  fashion  was  simplicity — but  here  Tit- 
mouse grew  fidgety,  and  his  Mentor  ceased. 

During  the  night  which  ushered  in  the  eventful  day  of  Tit- 
mouse's dining  with  the  Earl  of  Dreddlington,  our  friend  got 
but  very  little  sleep.  Early  in  the  morning  he  engaged  a  most 
respectable  glass-coach  to  convey  him  westward  in  something 
like  style  ;  and  before  noon,  his  anxieties  were  set  at  rest  by 
the  punctual  arrival  of  various  articles  of  dress,  and  decora- 
tion, and  scent — for  Titmouse  had  a  great  idea  of  scents.  As 
for  his  new  watch  and  its  brilliant  gold  guard-chain— his  eyes 
gloated  upon  them.  What,  he  thought,  should  he  have  been 
without  them!  About  half-past  three  o'clock  he  retired  to 
his  bed-room,  and  resigned  himself  into  the  hands  of  the  tip- 
top hairdresser  from  the  Strand  whose  agreeable  manipula- 
tions, and  still  more  agreeable  small  talk,  occupied  upwards 
of  an  hour.  Titmouse  giving  the  anxious  operator  abundant 


418  flEN  THOUSAND  A-TEAR. 

notice  of  the  high  quarter  in  which  his  handiwork  was  likely 
soon  to  be  scrutinized. 

"  Pray-a,  can  you  tell  me,"  quoth  Titmouse,  drawlingly, 
shortly  after  Twirl  had  coiiimenced  his  operations,  "  how 
long  will  it  take  me  to  get  from  this  infernal  part  of  the  town 
to  Grosvenor  Square  ?—Dem  long  way,  isn't  it,  Mr.  what's- 
your-name?" 

"Grosvenor  Square,  sir?"  said  Twirl,  glibly,  but  with  a 
perceptible  dash  of  deference  in  his  tone  ;  "  why  it  is  as  one 
might  say  a  tolerable  way  off,  certainly ;  but  you  can't  well 
miss  your  way  there,  sir,  of  all  places  in  town " 

"  My  coachman,"  interrupted  Titmouse,  with  a  fine  air, 
"  of  course,  had  I  thought  of  it,  he  must  know." 

"  Oh  !  to  be  sure,  sir.  There's  none  but  people  of  the  most 
highest  rank  lives  in  that  quarter,  sir.  Excuse  me,  sir,  but 
I've  a  brother-in-law  that's  valet  to  the  Duke  of  Dunder- 
whistle  there " 

"  Indeed !  How  far  off  is  that  from  Lord  Dreddlington's  ?  " 
inquired  Titmouse  carelessly. 

"  Lord  Dreddlington's,  sir  r— Well,  I  never !  Isn't  it  partic- 
ular strange,  if  that's  where  you're  going,  sir — it's  next  door 
to  the  Duke's— the  very  next  door,  sir !  " 

'  Ton  my  life,  is  it  indeed  ?    How  devilish  odd ! " 

"  Know  the  Earl  of  Dreddlington  then,  I  presume,  sir  ?  " 

"  Ya-a-s,  I  should  think  so :  his  my — my — relation,  that's 
all ;  and  devilish  near  too !  " 

Mr.  Twirl  instantly  conceived  a  kind  of  reverence  for  the 
gentleman  upon  whom  he  was  operating. 

"  Well,  sir,"  he  presently  added,  in  a  still  more  respectful 
tone  than  before,  "  p'r'aps  you'll  think  it  a  liberty,  sir ;  but, 
do  you  know,  I've  several  times  had  the  honor  of  seeing  his 
lordship  in  the  street  at  a  little  distance— and  there's  a— a 
family  likness  between  you,  sir — 'pon  my  word,  sir.  It  struck 
me,  directly  I  saw  you,  that  you  was  like  some  nob  I'd  seen 
at  the  other  end  of  the  town."  [Here  Titmouse  experienced 
pleasurable  sensations,  similar  to  those  of  a  cat  when  you  pass 
your  hand  down  its  glossy  coat  in  the  right  direction.]  "Will 
you  allow  me,  sir,  to  give  your  hair  a  good  brushing,  sir,  be- 
fore I  dress  it  ?  I  always  like  to  take  the  greatest  pains  with  the 
hair  of  my  quality  customers  !— Do  you  know,  sir,  that  I  had 
the  honor  of  dressing  his  Grace's  hair  for  a  whole  fortnight 
together,  once  when  my  brother-in-law  was  ill !  and  though, 
p'r'aps  I  oughtn't  to  say  it,  his  Grace  expressed  the  highest 
satisfaction  at  my  exertions,  sir." 

"  'Pon  my  life,  and  I  should  say  you  were  an  uncommon 
good  hand — I've  known  lots  worse,  I  assure  you;  men  that 
would  have  spoiled  the  best  head  of  hair  going,  by  Jove  !  " 

"  Sir,  you're  very  kind.  I  assure  you,  sir,  that  to  do  justice 
to  agent's  hair  requires  an  uncommon  deal  of  practice,  and  a 
sort  of  natural  talent  for  it  besides.  Lord,  sir  !  how  much 
depends  on  a  gent's  hair,  don't  it?  Of  two  coming  into  a 


THOUSAND  A-YEAB.  419 

room,  it  makes  all  the  difference,  sir !  Believe  me,  sir,  it's  no 
use  being  well  dressed,  nay,  nor  good-looking,  if  as  how  the 
hair  a' n't  done  what  I  call  correct." 

"  By  Jove,  I  really  think  you're  nigh  ab9ut  the  mark,"  said 
Titmouse  ;  and  after  a  pause,  during  which  Mr.  Twirl  had 
been  brushing  away  at  one  particular  part  of  the  head  with 
some  vehemence ;  "  well,"  he  exclaimed,  with  a  sigh,  ceasing 
for  a  moment  his  vigorous  exertions—"  I'm  blest  if  I  can 
manage  it,  do  what  I  will !  " 

"  Eh  ?  What's  that  ?  What  is  it  ?  "  inquired  Titmouse,  a 
little  alarmedly. 

"  Why,  sir,  it's  what  we  gents,  in  our  profession,  calls  a 
feather,  which  is  the  most  hobstinatest  thing  in  nature." 

"  What's  a  feather?"  quoth  Titmouse,  rather  faintly. 

"  You  see,  sir,  'tis  when  a  small  lot  of  hair  on  a  gent's  head 
will  stick  up,  do  all  we  can  to  try  and  get  it  down ;  and 
(excuse  me,  sir,)  you've  got  a  regular  rattler  !  "  Titmouse  put 
up  his  hand  to  feel,  Twirl  guiding  it  to  the  fatal  spot :  there 
it  was,  just  as  Twirl  had  described  it. 

"  What's  to  be  done?  "  murmured  Titmouse. 
I'm  afraid,  sir,  you  don't  use  our  OSTRICH  GREASE  and 

RHINOCEROS    MARROW,    Sir." 

"  Your  what  f  "  cried  Titmouse  apprehensively,  Avith  a  dis- 
mally distinct  recollection  of  the  tragedy  of  the  Cyano- 
chaitanthropopoion,  and  the  Damascus  Cream,  and  the 
Tetaragmenon  Abracadabra ;  matters  whicii  he  at  once  men- 
tioned to  Mr.  Twirl. 

"  Ah,  it's  not  my  custom,  sir."  quoth  Twirl,  "  to  run  down 
other  gents'  inventions  ;  but  mv  real  opinion  is,  that  they're 
all  an  imposition— a  rank  imposition,  sir.  I  didn't  like  to  say 
it,  sir ;  but  I  soon  saw  there  had  been  somebody  a-practising 
on  your  hair." 

"'What,  is  it  very  plain  ? ''  cried  Titmouse,  starting  up  and 
stepping  to  the  glass. 

t<:]STo,  sir— not  so  very  plain;  only  you've  got,  as  I  might 
say,  accustomed  to  the  sight  of  it ;  but  when  it's  properly 
curled  and  puckered  up,  and  frizzed  about,  it  won't  show— 
nor  the  feather  neither,  sir;  so,  by  your  leave,  here  goes, 
sir ;"  and,  after  about  a  quarter-of-an-hour's  more  labor,  he 
succeeded  in  parting  it  right  down  the  middle  of  the  head, 
bringing  it  out  into  a  bold  curl  towards  each  eyebrow,  and 
giving  our  friend  quite  a  new  and  very  fascinating  appear- 
ance, even  in  his  own  eyes.  And  as  for  the  color— it  really 
was  not  so  very  marked  after  all ;  a  little  purple-hued  and 
mottled,  to  be  sure,  in  parts,  but  not  to  a  degree  to  attract 
the  eye  of  a  casual  observer.  Twirl  having  declared,  at 
length,  his  labors  completed— regarding  Titmouse's  head 
with  a  look  of  proud  satisfaction— Titmouse  paid  him  half-a- 
crown,  and  also  ordered  a  pot  of  ostrich  grease  and  of  rhino- 
ceros marrow  (the  one  being  suet,  the  other  lard,  differently 
scented  and  colored,)  and  was  soon  left  at  liberty  to  proceed 


420  TEN  THOUSAND  A-YEAR. 

with  the  important  duties  of  the  toilet.  It  took  him  a  good 
while ;  but  in  the  end  he  was  supremely  successful.  He  wore 
black  tights,  (i.  e.  pantaloons  fitting  closely  to  his  legs,  and 
tied  round  his  ankles  with  black  ribbons,)  silk  stockings, 
and  shoes  with  glittering  silver  buckles.  His  white  necker- 
chief was  tied  Avith  great  elegance,  not  a  wrinkle  superfluous 
being  visible  in  it.  His  shirt  front  of  lace,  had  two  handsome 
diamond  pins,  connected  together  by  a  little  delicate  gold 
chain,  glistening  in  the  middle  of  it.  Then  he  had  a  white 
waistcoat  edge,  next  a  crimson  one,  and  lastly,  a  glorious 
sky-blue  satin  waistcoat,  spangled  all  over  with  gold  flowers 
inwrought — and  across  it  hung  his  new  gold  watch  guard,  and 
his  silver  guard  for  his  eye-glass,  producing  an  inconceivably 
fine  effect.  His  coat  was  of  a  light-brown,  of  exquisite  cut, 
fitting  him  as  closely  as  if  he  had  been  born  in  it,  and  with 
burnished  brass  buttons,  of  sugar-loaf  shape.  'Twas  padded 
also  with  great  judgment,  and  really  took  off  more  of  his 
round  shouldered  awkwardness  of  figure  than  any  coat  he 
had  ever  before  had.  Then  he  had  a  fine  white  pocket  hand- 
kerchief, soaked  in  lavender  water,  and  immaculate  white 
kid  gloves.  Thus  habited,  he  stood  before  his  glass,  boxving 
fifty  different  times,  and  adjusting  his  expression  to  various 
elegant  forms  of  address.  He  was  particularly  struck  with 
the  combined  effect  of  the  two  curls  of  his  hair  towards 
each  eye,  and  the  hair  underneath  his  chin  curved  upwards 
on  each  side  of  his  mouth  in  complete  symmetry.  I  have 
ascertained  from  Mr.  Titmouse  himself,  that  on  this  memo- 
rable occasion  of  his  first  introduction  to  NOBILITY,  every  item 
of  dress  and  decoration  was  entirely  new;  and  when  at 
length  his  labors  had  been  completed,  he  felt  great  compos- 
ure of  mind,  and  a  consciousness  of  the  decisive  effect  he 
must  produce  upon  those  into  whose  presence  he  was  soon  to 
be  ushered.  His  "  carriage  "  was  presently  announced ;  and 
after  keeping  it  standing  a  few  minutes,  merely  for  form's 
sake,  he  gently  placed  his  hat  upon  his  head,  drew  on  one 
glove,  took  his  little  ebony  cane  in  his  hand,  and,  with  a  hur- 
ried inward  prayer  that  he  might  be  equal  to  the  occasion, 
i  stepped  forth  from  his  apartment,  and  passed  on  to  the  glass 
coach.  Such  a  brilliant  little  figure,  I  will  take  upon  myself 
to  say,  had  never  before  issued  nor  will  perhaps  ever  again 
issue,  from  the  Cabbage-stalk  hotel.  The  waiters  whom  he 
passed,  inclined  towards  him  with  instinctive  reverence.  He 
was  very  fine  to  be  sure  ;  but  who  could,  they  justly  thought, 
be  dressed  too  finely  that  had  ten  thousand  a-year,  and  was 
going  to  dine  with  a  lord  in  Grosvenor  Square  ? 

Titmouse  was  soon  on  his  way  towards  that  at  once  desired 
and  dreaded  region.  He  gazed  with  a  look  of  occasional  pity 
and  contempt  as  he  passed  along,  at  the  plebeian  pedestrians 
and  the  lines  of  shops  on  each  side  of.  the  narrow  streets,  till 
he  began  to  perceive  indications  of  superior  modes  of  exist- 
ence j  when,  however,  he  began  to  feel  a  little  fidgety  and 


TEN  THOUSAND  A-YEAR.  421 

nervous.  The  streets  grew  wider,  the  squares  greater,  hack- 
ney  coaches  (unsightly  objects)  became  fewer  and  fewer,  giv- 
ing place  to  splendid  vehicles,  coaches,  and  chariots,  with  one, 
two,  and  even  three  footmen  clustering  behind,  with  long 
canes,  with  cockades,  with  shoulder  knots ;  crimson,  yellow, 
blue,  green  hamniercloths,  \yith  burnished  crests  upon  them 
and  sleek  coachmen  with  wigs  and  three-cornered  nats,  and 
horses  that  pawed  the  ground  with  very  pride  ;  ladies,  with- 
in, glistening  in  satin, lace,  and  jewels— their  lords  beside 
them,  leaning  back  with  countenances  so  stern  and  haughty ; 
oh,  by  all  that  was  magnificent !  Titmouse  felt  himself  gett- 
ing now  within  the  very  vortex  of  greatness  and  fashion,  and 
experienced  a  frequent  fluttering  and  catching  of  the  breath, 
and  an  indefinite  distressing  apprehension.  He  was,  how- 
ever, now  in  for  it— and  there  was  no  retreat.  As  he  neared 
Grosvenor  Square,  he  heard,  ever  and  anon,  terrific  thunder- 
ing noises  at  the  doors  opposite  which  these  splendid  ve- 
hicles drew  up— as  if  the  impatient  footmen  were  infuriated 
because  the  doors  did  not  fly  open  themselves,  at  the  sound 
of  the  approaching  carriage- wheels.  At  length  he  entered 
Grosvenor  Square,  that  "  pure  empyrean  "  of  earthly  great- 
ness. Carriages  rolled  haughtily  past  him,  others  dashed  des- 
perately in  different  directions.  At  each  side  of  Lord  Dred- 
diington's  house,  were  carriages  setting  down  with  tremen- 
dous uproar.  Mr.  Titmouse  felt  his  color  going,  and  his  heart 
began  to  beat  much  faster  than  usual.  'Twas  quite  in  vain 
that  he ''  hemmed  "  two  or  three  times,  by  way  of  trying  to 
reassure  himself :  he  felt  that  his  hour  was  come  ;  and  would 
have  been  glad  at  the  moment  for  any  decent  excuse  for 
driving  off  home  again,  and  putting  off  the  evil  day  a  little 
longer,  Opposite  the  dreaded  door  had  now  drawn  up  Mr. 
Titmouse's  glass  coach ;  and  the  decent  coachman— whose 
well-worn  hat,  and  long,  clean,  but  threadbare  blue  coat, 
and  ancient-looking  top-boots,  bespoke  their  wearer's  thrifti- 
ness— slowiy  alighting,  threw  the  reins  on  his  quiet  horses 
backs,  and  gave  a  modest  rat-tat-tat-tat-tat  at  the  door  with- 
out ringing. 

"  What  name  shall  I  give,  sir  ?  "  said  he,  returning  to  his 
coach,  and  letting  down  the  loud  clanking  steps,  with  a  noise 
for  which  Titmouse  eould  have  heartily  kicked  him. 

"  Titmouse— Mr.  Titmouse,"  replied  he  hurriedly,  as  the 
lofty  door  was  thrown  open  by  the  corpulent  porter,  disclos- 
ing several  footmen,  with  powdered  heads,  standing  in  the 
hall  waiting  for  him. 

"  Mr.  Titmouse !  "  exclaimed  the  coachman  to  the  servants  : 
then,  addressing  again  his  flustered  fare— "When  shall  I 
come  back  for  you,  sir  ?  " 

"  D—  me,  sir— don't  bother  me,"f altered  Titmouse ;  and  the 
next  moment  was  in  the  hands  of  the  Philistines— the  door 
•was  closed  upon  him.  All  his  presence  of  mind  had  evapo- 
rated }  the  excellent  lessons  given  him  by  Mr.  Gammon,  nad 


422  TEN  THOUSAND  A-YEAE 

disappeared  like  breath  upon  the  polished  mirror.  Though 
Lord  Dreddlington's  servants  had  never  before  seen  in  the 
house  so  strange  an  object  as  poor  little  Titmouse,  they  were 
of  far  too  highly  polished  manners  to  appear  to  notice  any. 
thing  unusual.  They  silently  motioned  him  up  stairs  with 
a  bland  courteous  air,  he  carrying  his  little  agate-headed 
cane  in  one  hand,  and  his  new  hat  in  the  other.  A  gentle- 
manly person  in  a  full  black  dress  suit,  opened  the  drawing- 
room  door  for  him,  with  an  elegant  inclination  which  Tit- 
mouse very  gracefully  returned.  A  faint  mist  seemed  to  be  in 
the  drawing-room  for  a  second  or  two ;  quickly  clearing  away, 
however,  Titmouse  beheld,  at  the  upper  end,  but  two  figures, 
that  of  an  old  gentleman  and  a  young  lady— in  fact,  the  Earl 
of  Dreddlington  and  Lady  Cecilia.  Now,  that  great  man  had 
not  been  a  whit  behindhand,  in  the  matter  of  dress,  with  the 
little  creature  now  trembling  before  him ;  being  in  truth, 
full  as  anxious  to  make  an  effective  first  appearance  in  the 
eyes  of  Titmouse,  as  he  in  those  of  the  Earl  of  Dreddlington. 
And  each  had  succeeded  in  his  way.  There  was  little  or  no 
substantial  difference  between  them.  The  Right  Honorable 
the  Earl  Dreddlington  was  an  old  experienced  fool,  and  Tit- 
tlebat Titmouse  a  young  inexperienced  one.  They  were  the 
same  species  of  plant,  but  grown  in  different  soils.  The  one 
had  had  to  struggle  through  a  neglected  existence  by  the 
dusty,  hard  roadside  of  life  j  the  other  had  had  all  the  advan- 
tages of  hothouse  cultivation— its  roots  striking  deep  into, 
and  thriving  upon  the  rich  manure  of  sycophancy  and  adula- 
tion ! — We  have  seen  how  anxious  was  our  little  friend  to 
appear  as  became  the  occasion,  before  his  great  kinsman  • 
who,  in  his  turn,  had  several  times  during  the  day  exulted 
secretly  in  the  anticipation  of  the  impression  which  must  be 
produced  upon  the  mind  of  Titmouse  by  the  sudden  display, 
in  the  Earl's  person,  of  the  sublimest  distinctions  which 
society  can  bestow,  short  of  royalty.  It  had  once  or  twice 
occurred  to  the  Earl,  whether  he  could  find  any  fair  excuse 
for  appearing  in  his  full  general's  uniform  ;  but  on  maturer 
reflection,  governed  by  that  simplicity  and  severity  of  taste 
which  ever  distinguished  him,  he  abandoned  that  idea,  and 
appeared  in  a  plain  blue  coat,  white  waistcoat,  and  black 
knee-breeches.  But  on  his  left  breast  glittered  one  or  two 
f9reign  orders,  and  across  his  waistcoat  was  the  broad  red 
ribbon  of  the  Bath.  His  hair  was  white  and  fine ;  his  cold 
blue  eye  and  haughty  lip  gave  him  an  expression  of  severe 
dignity  :  and  he  stood  erect  as  an  arrow.  Lady  Cecilia 
reclined  on  the  sofa,  with  an  air  of  languor  and  ennui  that 
had  become  habitual  to  her;  and  was  dressed  in  glistening 
white  satin,  with  a  necklace  of  large  and  very  beautiful 
pearls.  The  Earl  was  standing  in  an  attitude  of  easy 
grace  to  receive  his  guest,  as  to  whose  figure  and  height, 
by  the  way,  he  was  quite  in  the  dark— Mr.  Titmouse  might 
be  a  great  or  a  little  man,  and  forward  or  bashful,  and  r$- 


TEN  THOUSAND  A- TEAS.  423 

quire  a  corresponding  demeanor  and  address  on  the  part  of 
the  Earl.  "  An,  my  God ! "  involuntarily  exclaimed  Lord 
Dreddlington  to  himself,  the  instant  his  eye  caught  sight  of 
Titmouse,  who  approached  slowly,  making  profound  and 
formal  obeisances.  The  Earl  stood  rooted  to  the  spot  he 
had  occupied  when  Titmouse  entered.  If  his  servants  had 
turned  an  ape  into  the  dra whig-room,  the  Earl  could  scarcely 
have  felt  or  exhibited  greater  amazement  than  he  now  ex- 
perienced for  a  moment.  "Ah,  my  God!"  thought  he, 
'  what  a  fool  have  we  here?  what  creature  is  this  ?"  Then 
it  flashed  across  his  mind ;  "  May  this  be  THE  FUTURE  LORD 
DRELINCOURT  ?  "  He  was  on  the  point  of  recoiling  from  his 
suddenly  discovered  kinsman  in  dismay,  (as  for  Lady  Cecilia, 
she  gazed  at  him,  through  the  glass,  in  silent  horror,  after  a 
faint  exclamation,  on  his  first  becoming  visible,  of  "  Graci- 
ous! Papa!")  when  his  habitual  self-command  came  to  his 
assistance;  and  advancing  very  slowly  a  step  or^yo  towards 
Titmouse, — who,  after  a  hurried  glance  around  him,  saw  no 
place  to  deposit  his  hat  and  cane  upon  except  the  floor,  on 
which  he  accordingly  dropped  them,— the  Earl  extended 
his  hand,  slightly  compressed  the  tips  of  Titmouse's  fingers, 
and  bowed  courteously,  but  with  infinite  concern  in  his 
features. 

"  I  am  happy,  Mr.  Titmouse,  to  make  your  acquaintance," 
said  the  Earl  slowly—"  Sir,  I  have  the  honor  to  present  you 
to  my  daughter  the  Lady  Cecilia."  Titmouse,  who  by  this 
time  had  got  into  a  sort  of  cold  sweat — a  condition  from 
which  the  Earl  was  really  not  very  far  removed— made  a  very 
profound  and  formal  bow,  he  had  been  taking  lessons  from 
a  posture-master  at  one  of  the  theatres,)  first  to  the  Earl,  and 
then  to  Lady  Cecilia,  who  rose  about  two  inches  from  the 
sofa,  and  then  sank  again  upon  it,  without  removing  her  eyes 
from  the  figure  of  Titmouse,  who  went  on  bowing,  first  to 
the  one  and  then  to  the  other,  till  the  Earl  had  engaged  him 
in  conversation. 

"  It  gives  me  pleasure,  sir,  to  see  that  you  are  punctual  in 
your  engagements.  I  am  so  t9O,  sir  ;  and  owe  no  small  por- 
tion of  my  success  in  life  to  it.  Punctuality,  sir,  in  small 
matters,  leads  to  punctuality  in  great  matters."  This  was 


tions  ;  "to  be  sure— wouldn't  have  been  behind  time,  your 
lordship,  for  a  minute,  my  lord ;  uncommon  bad  manners, 

if  it  pleases  your  lordship 

"  Will  you  be  seated,  sir  ?"  interrupted  the  Earl,  deliber- 
ately motioning  him  to  a  chair,  and  then  sitting  down  beside 
him ;  after  which  the  Earl  seemed,  for  a  second  or  two,  to 
forget  himself,  staring  in  silence  at  Titmouse,  and  then  in 
consternation  at  Lady  Cecilia.  "I— I—'  said  he,  suddenly 
recoUecting  himself,  "beg  your  par— sir,  I  mean  I  congratu- 


424  TEN  THOUSAND  A-YEAR. 

late  you  upon  your  recent  success.  Sir,  it  must  have  been 
rather  a  surprise  to  you  ?  " 

"Oh  yes,  sir— my  lord, most  uncommon,  may  it  please  your 
lordship — particular — but  right  is  right — please  your  lord- 
ship  " 

["  Oh  Heavens !  merciful  Heavens !  How  horrid  is  all  this ! 
Am  I  awake  or  only  dreaming  ?  "Pis  an  idiot — and  what's 
worse,  a  vulgar  idiot.  My  God!  And  this  thing  may  be 
Lord  Drelincotirt"  This  was  what  was  passing  through 
Lord  Dreddlington's  mind,  while  his  troubled  eye  was  fixed 
upon  Titmouse.] 

"  It  is,  indeed,  Mr.  Titmouse,"  replied  his  lordship,  "  very 
true  ;  sir,  what  you  say  is  correct.  Quite  so  ;  exactly."  His 
eye  was  fixed  on  Titmouse,  but  his  words  were  uttered,  as 
it  were,  mechanically,  and  in  a  musing  manner.  It  flitted 
for  a  moment  across  his  mind,  whether  he  should  ring  the 
bell,  and  order  the  servant  to  show  out  of  the  house  the  fear- 
ful imp  that  just  been  shown  into  it ;  but  at  that  critical 
moment  he  detected  poor  Titmouse's  eye  fixed  with  a  kind 
of  reverent  intensity  upon  his  lordship's  glittering  orders. 
'Twas  a  lucky  look  that  for  Titmouse,  for  it  began  to  melt 
away  the  ice  that  was  getting  round  the  little  heart  of  his 
august  relative.  'Twas  evident  that  the  poor  young  man 
had  not  been  accustomed  to  society,  thought  the  Earl,  with 
an  approach  towards  the  compassionate  mood.  He  was 
frightfully  dressed  to  be  sure  ;  and  as  for  his  speech,  he  was 
manifestly  overawed  by  the  Presence  in  which  he  found 
himself ;  [  that  thought  melted  a  little  more  of  the  ice.] 
Yet,  was  it  not  evident  that  he  had  some  latent  power  of  ap- 
preciating real  distinction  when  he  beheld  it  ?  [  the  little 
heart  here  lost  all  the  ice  that  had  begun  so  suddenly  to 
encrust  it.]  And  again  ;— he  has  actually  thrust  out  the  in- 
tolerable Aubrey,  and  is  now  lawful  owner  of  Yatton— of 

TEN  THOUSAND  A-YEAR 

"Did  you  see  the  review  to-day,  sir?"  inquired  the  Earl, 
rather  blandly.  "  His  Majesty  was  there,  sir,  and  seemed  to 
enjoy  the  scene."  Titmouse  with  a  timid  air,  said  that  he 
had  not  seen  it,  as  he  had  been  upon  the  river ;  and  after  a 
few  more  general  observations—  Will  yon  permit  me,  sir  ? 
It  is  from  A  QUARTER  requiring  the  highest — a-hem  !  "  said 
the  Earl  as  a  note  was  brought  him,  wnich  he  immediately 
opened  and  read.  Lady  Cecilia  also  appearing  engaged 
reading,  Titmouse  had  a  moment's  breathing  time  and 
interval  of  relief.  What  would  he  have  given,  he  thought, 
for  some  other  person,  or  several  persons,  to  come  in  and 
divide  the  attention — the  intolerably  oppressive  attention  of 
the  two  august  individuals  then  before  him  !  He  seized  the 
opportunity  to  cast  a  furtive  glance  around  the  room.  It 
opened  into  a  second,  which  opened  into  a  third  :  how  spa- 
cious each  and  lofty !  And  glittering  glass  chandeliers  in  each  ! 
What  chimney  and  pier  glasses !  What  rich  crimson  satin 


TEN  THOUSAND  A-YEAR.  425 

curtains — they  must  have  cost  twelve  or  fourteen  shillings 
a-yard  at  least !— The  carpets  of  the  finest  Brussels—  and 
they  felt  like  velvet  to  the  feet ;— then  the  brackets,  of  marble 
and  gold,  with  snowy  statues  and  vases  glistening  upon  each; 
chairs  so  delicate,  and  gilded  all  over— he  almost  feared  to 
sit  down  on  them.  What  would  the  Quirks  and  Tag-rags 
think  of  this  ?  Faugh— only  to  think  for  a  moment  of  Alibi 
House  and  Satin  Lodge  !— Then  there  was  the  Lady  Cecilia 
--a  lady  of  high  rank !  How  rich  her  dress— and  how  haught- 
ily beautiful  she  looked  as  she  reclined  upon  the  sofa !  [she 
was  in  fact  busy  conning  over  the  new  opera,  coming  out  the 
next  evening.]  And  the  Earl  of  Dreddlington— there  he  was, 
reading,  doubtless,  some  letter  from  the  King  or  one  of  the 
royal  family— a  man  of  great  rank— resplendent  in  his  deco- 
rations— all  just  as  he  had  seen  in  pictures,  and  heard  and 
read  of— what  must  that  red  ribbon  have  cost?  [Ay,  indeed, 
poor  Lord  Dreddlington,  it  had  cost  you  the  labor  of  half  a 
life  of  steadfast  sycophancy,  of  watchful  manoeuvring,  and 
desperate  exertion !  And  at  last,  the  minister  tossed  it  to 
you  in  a  moment  of  disgust  and  despair — mortally  perplex- 
ed by  the  conflicting  claims  of  two  sulky  Dukes  and  a  quer- 
ulous old  Marquis,  each  of  whom  threatened  to  withdraw  his 
"  influence  and  support"  if  his  real  rival's  claims  were  prefer- 
red!]  He  had  never  seen  any  of  such  a  breadth.—  It  must 
have  been  manufactured  on  purpose  for  the  Earl! —  How 
white  were  his  hands  !  And  he  had  an  antique  massive  sig- 
net-ring on  his  forefinger,  and  two  glittering  rings  at  least 
on  each  of  his  little  fingers — positively  Titmouse  at  length 
began  to  regard  him  almost  as  a  god :— and  yet  the  amazing 
thought  occurred  that  this  august  being  was  allied  to  him 
by  the  ties  of  relationship!— Such  were  the  thoughts  and 
reflections  passing  through  the  mind  of  Titmouse,  during 
the  time  that  Lord  Dreddlington  was  engaged  in  reading 
his  letter — and  afterwards  during  the  brief  intervals  which 
elapsed  between  the  various  observations  addressed  to  him 
by  his  lordship. 

The  gentleman  in  black  at  length  entered  the  room,  and 
advancing  slowly  and  noiselessly  towards  the  Earl,  said,  in 
a  quiet  manner,  Dinner,  my  lord  ; "  and  retired.  Into  what 
new  scenes  of  splendid  embarrassment  was  this  the  signal 
for  Mr.  Titmouse's  introduction?  thought 'our  friend  and 
trembled. 

"  Mr.  Titmouse,  will  you  give  your  arm  to  the  Lady  Cecilia  ?" 
said  the  Earl,  motioning  him  to  the  sofa.  Up  jumped  Tit- 
mouse, and  approached  hastily  the  recumbent  beauty,  who 
languidly  arose,  arranged  her  train  with  one  hand,  and  with 
the  other,  having  drawn  on  her  glove,  just  barely  touched 
the  proffered  arm  of  Titmouse,  extended  tovvards  her  at  a 
very  acute  angle,  and  at  right  angles  with  his  own  body- 
stammering,  ''Honor  to  take  your  ladyship— uncommon 
proud— this  way,  my  lady."— Lady  Cecilia  took  no  more 


426  TEN  THOUSAND  A-YEAB. 

notice  of  him  than  if  he  had  been  a  dumb  waiter,  walking 
beside  him  in  silence — the  earl  following.  To  think  that  a 
nobleman  of  high  rank  was  walking  behind  him ! 

Would  to  heaven  thought  the  embarrassed  Titmouse,  that 
he  had  two  fronts,  one  for  the  Earl  behind,  and  the  other  to 
be  turned  full  towards  Lady  Cecilia !  The  tall  servants,  pow- 
dered and  in  light  blue  liveries,  stood  like  a  guard  of  honor 
around  the  dining-room  door.  That  room  was  extensive  and 
lofty :  what  a  solitary  sort  of  state  were  they  about  to  dine 
in !  Titmouse  felt  cold  though  it  was  summer,  and  trembled 
as  he  followed,  rather  than  led,  his  haughty  partner  to  her 
seat ;  and  then  was  motioned  into  his  own  by  the  Earl,  him* 
self  sitting  down  opposite  a  chased  silver  soup  tureen !  A 
servant  stood  behind  Lady  Cecilia  and  Titmouse  ;  also  on  the 
left  of  the  Earl,  while  on  his. right,  between  his  lordship  and 
the  glistening  sideboard,  stood  a  portly  gentleman  in  black, 
with  a  bald  head  and  a  somewhat  haughty  countenance. 
Though  Titmouse  had  touched  nothing  since  breakfast,  he 
felt  not  the  slightest  inclination  to  eat,  and  would  have  given 
the  world  to  have  dared  to  say  as  much,  and  be  at  once  re- 
lieved from  a  vast  deal  of  anxiety.  Is  it  indeed  easy  to  con- 
ceive of  a  fellow-creature  in  a  state  of  more  complete  thral- 
dom, at  that  moment,  than  poor  little  Titmouse  ?  A  little 
animal  under  the  suddenly  exhausted  receiver  of  an  air  pump, 
or  a  fish  just  plucked  out  of  its  own  element,  and  flung  gasp- 
ing and  struggling  upon  the  grass,  may  serve  to  assist  your 
conceptions  of  the  position  and  sufferings  of  Mr.  Titmouse. 
The  Earl,  who  was  on  the  look-out  for  it,  observed  his  con- 
dition with  secret  but  complete  satisfaction  ;  here  he  beheld 
the  legitimate  effect  of  raiik  and  state  upon  the  human  mind. 
Titmouse  got  through  the  soup — of  which  about  half-a-dozen 
spoonfuls  only  were  put  into  his  plate— pretty  fairly.  Any- ' 
where  else  than  at  Lord  Dreddlington's,  Titmouse  would  have 
thought  it  thin  watery  staff  with  a  few  green  things  chopped 
up  and  swimming  in  it ;.  but  now  he  perceived  that  it  had  a 
spot  of  superior  flavor.  How  some  red  mullet,  enclosed  in 
paper,  puzzled  poor  Titmouse,  is  best  known  to  himself.. 

"  The  Lady  Cecilia  will  take  wine  with  you,  Mr.  Titmouse, 
I  dare  say—  observed  the  Earl ;  and  in  a  moment's  time, 
but  with  perfect  deliberation,  the  servants  poured  wine  into 
the  two  glasses.  "  Your  ladyship's  health,  my  lady—"  falter- 
ed Titmouse.  She  slightly  bowed,  and  a  faint  smile  glim- 
mered at  the  corners  of  her  mouth—  but  unobserved  by 
Titmouse.  *  * 

"  I  think  you  said,  Mr.  Titmouse,"  quoth  the  Earl,  some 
time  afterwards,  "  that  you  had  not  yet  taken  possession  of 
Yatton?" 

"  No,  my  lord ;  but  I  go  down  the  day  after  to-morrow — 
quite — if  I  may  say  it,  my  lord — quite  in  style — "  answered 
Titmouse,  in  a  style  of  humble  and  hesitating  jocularity. 

" Ha,  ha! " — exclaimed  the  Earl  gently. 


TEN  THOUSAND  A-YEAR.  427 

"  Had  you  any  acquaintance  with  the  Aubreys,  Mr.  Tit- 
mouse ?  f'  inquired  the  Lady  Cecilia. 

"  No,  my  lady— yes,  your  ladyship,  (I  beg  your  ladyship's 
pardon)— but,  now  I  think  of  it,  1  had  a  slight  acquaintance 
with  Miss  Aubrey."  [Titmouse,  Titmouse,  you  little  wretch, 
how  dare  you  say  so  ?] 

"  She  is  considered  pretty  in  the  country,  I  believe,"  drawl- 
ed Lady  Cecilia  languidly. 

"  Oh;  most  uncommon  lovely  !— middling,  only  middling, 
my  lady  I  should  say"— added  Titmouse  suddenly;  having 
observed,  as  he  fancied,  rather  a  displeased  look  in  lady  Ceci- 
lia. He  had  begun  his  sentence  with  more  energy  tnan  he 
had  yet  shown  in  the  house  ;  he  finished  it  hastily,  and  color- 
ed as  he  spoke— feeling  that  he  had  somehow  committed  him- 
self. 

"Do  you  form  a  new  establishment  at  Yatton,  sir?"  en- 
quired the  Earl,  "  or  take  to  any  part  of  that  of  your  pre- 
decessor ?  " 

"  I  have  not,  please  your  lordship,  made  up  my  mind  yet 
exactly— should  like  to  know  your  lordship's  opinion." 

"  Why,  sir,  I  should  be  governed  by  circumstances — by 
circumstances,  sir  ;  when  you  get  there,  sir,  you  will  be  bet- 
ter able  to  judge  of  the  course  you  should  pursue." 

"  Do  you  intend,  Mr.  Titmouse,  to  live  in  town,  or  in  the 
country  ?  inquired  Lady  Cecilia. 

"  A  little  or  both,  my  lady— but  mostly  in  town ;  because, 
as  your  ladyship  sees,  the  country  is  devilish  dull— 'pon  my 
life,  my  lady — my  lord — beg  a  thousand  pardons,"  he  added, 
bowing  to  both,  and  blushing  violently.  Here  he  had  com- 
mitted himself ;  but  his  august  companions  bowed  to  him 
very  kindly,  and  he  presently  recovered  his  self-possession. 

"  Are  you  fond  of  hunting,  Mr.  Titmouse  ?  "  inquired  the 
Earl. 

"  Why,  my  lord,  can't  exactly  say  that  I  am— but  your  lord- 
ship sees,  cases  alter  circumstances,  and  when  I  get  down 
there  among  the  coujitry  gents,  p'r'aps  I  may  do  as  they  do, 
my  lord." 

"  I  presume,  Mr.  Titmouse,  you  have  scarcely  chosen  a 
town  residence  yet?"  inquired  Lady  Cecilia. 

"  No,  my  lady— not  fixed  it  yet— was  thinking  of  taking  Mr. 
Aubrey's  house  in  Grosvenor  Street,  understanding  it  is  to 
be  sold ;  "  then  turning  towards  the  Earl—"  because,  as  your 
lordship  see,  I  was  thinking  of  getting  into  both  the  nests  of 
the  old  birds,  while  both  are  warm"— he  added,  with  a  very 
faint  smile. 

"  Exactly  ;  yes— I  see,  sir— I  understand  you,"  replied  Lord 
Dreddlington,  sipping  his  wine.  His  manner  rather  discom- 
posed Titmouse,  to  whom  it  then  very  naturally  occurred  that 
the  Earl  might  be  warmly  attached  to  the  Aubreys,  and  not 
relish  their  being  spoken  of  so  lightly ;  so  Titmouse  hastily 
and  anxiously  added—"  your  lordship  sees  I  was  most  partis 


428  TEN  THOUSAND  A-YEAE. 

ular  sorry  to  make  the  Aubreys  turn  out.  A  most  uncommon 
respectable  gent,  Mr.  Aubrey :  I  assure  your  lordship  I  think 
so." 

"  I  had  not  the  honor  of  his  acquaintance,  sir,"  replied  the 
Earl  coldly,  and  with  exceeding  stiffness,  which  flustered 
Titmouse  not  a  little ;  and  a  pause  occurred  in  the  conversa- 
tion for  a  minute  or  two.  Dinner  had  now  considerably  ad- 
vanced, and  Titmouse  was  beginning  to  grow  a  little  familiar 
with  the  routine  of  matters.  Remembering  Gammon's  caution 
concerning  the  wine,  and  also  observing  how  very  little  was 
drunk  by  the  Earl  and  Lady  Cecilia,  Titmouse  did  the  same 
and  during  the  whole  of  dinner  had  scarcely  three  full  glasses 
of  wine. 

"  How  long  is  it,"  inquired  the  Earl,  addressing  his  daugh- 
ter, "  since  they  took  that  house  ?  "  Lady  Cecilia  could  not 
say.  "  Stay— now  I  recollect— surely  it  was  just  before  my 
appointment  to  the  Household.  Yes  ;  it  was  about  that  time, 
I  now  recollect.  I  am  alluding,  Mr.  Titmouse,"  continued  the 
Earl,  addressing  him  in  a  very  gracious  manner,  "  to  an  ap- 
pointment under  the  Crown  of  some  little  distinction,  which 
I  was  solicited  to  accept,  at  the  personal  instance  of  his  Ma- 
jesty, on  the  occasion  of  our  party  coming  into  power— I  mean 
that  of  Lord  Steward  of  the  Household." 

"Dear  me, my  lord!  Indeed!  Only  to  think, your  lord- 
ship!" exclaimed  Titmouse,  with  infinite  deference  in  his 
manner,  which  encouraged  the  Earl  to  proceed. 

"  That,  sir,  was  an  office  of  great  importance,  and  I  had 
some  hesitation  in  undertaking  its  responsibility.  But,  sir, 
when  I  had  once  committed  myself  to  my  sovereign  and  my 
country,  I  resolve  to  give  them  my  best  services.  I  had  formed 
plans  for  effecting  very  extensive  alterations,  sir,  in  that  de- 
partment of  the  public  service,  which  I  have  no  doubt  would 
have  given  great  satisfaction  to  the  country  as  soon  as  the 
nature  of  my  attentions  became  generally  understood ;  when 
faction,  sir,  unfortunately  prevailed,  and  we  were  compelled 
to  relinquish  office." 

"  Dear  me,  my  lord !  How  particular  sorry  I  am  to  hear  it, 
my  lord ! "  exclaimed  Titmouse,  as  he  gazed  at  the  baffled 
statesman  with  an  expression  of  respectful  sympathy. 

"  Sir,  it  gives  me  sincere  satisfaction,"  said  the  Earl,  after 
a  pause,  "to  hear  that  our  political  opinions  agree " 

"  Oh  yes !  my  lord,  quite ;  s^<re  of  that 

"  I  assure  you,  sir,  that  some  little  acquaintance  with  the 
genius  and  spirit  of  the  British  constitution  has  satisfied  me 
that  this  country  can  never  be  safely  or  advantageously 
governed  except  on  sound  Whig  principles." — He  paused 

"  Yes,  my  lord ;  its  quite  true,  your  lordship—"  interposed 
Titmouse  reverentially. 

"  That,  sir,  is  the  only  way  I  knoAv  of  by  which  aristocratic 
institutions  can  be  brought  to  bear  effectively  upon,  to  blend 
harmoniously  with,  the  interests  of  the  lower  orders— th« 


TEX  THOUSAND  A-YEAR.  429 

people,  Mr.  Titmouse."  Titmouse  thought  this  wonderfully 
line,  and  sat  listening  as  to  an  oracle  of  political  wisdom. 
The  Earl,  observing  it,  began  to  form  a  much  higher  opinion 
of  his  little  kinsman.  "  The  unfortunate  gentleman,  your 
predecessor  at  Yatton,  sir,  if  he  had  but  allowed  himself  to 
have  been  guided  by  those  who  had  mixed  in  public  affairs 
before  he  was  born,"  said  the  Earl  with  great  dignity, 

"  'Pon  my  word,  my  lord,  he  was,  I've  heard,  a  d— -d  Tory! 
—Oh  my  lady!  my  lord!  humbly  beg  pardon,"  he  added, 
turning  pale ;  but  the  fatal  word  had  been  uttered,  and  heard 
by  both ;  and  he  felt  as  if  he  could  have  sunk  through  the 
floor. 

"  Shall  I  have  the  honor  of  taking  another  glass  of  wine 
with  you,  sir?"  inquired  the  Earl,  rather  gravely  and 
severely,  as  if  wishing  Mr.  Titmouse  fully  to  appreciate  the 
fearful  breach  of  etiquette  of  which  he  had  just  been  guilty. 
After  they  had  bowed  to  each  other,  a  very  awkward  pause 
occurred,  which  was  at  length  broken  by  the  considerate 
Lady  Cecilia. 

"  Are  you  fond  of  the  opera,  Mr.  Titmouse  ?  " 

"  Very,  my  lady — most  particular,"  replied  Titmouse,  who 
had  been  there  once  only. 

"  Do  you  prefer  the  opera,  or  the  ballet  ?  I  mean  the  music 
or  the  dancing?" 

"  Oh,  I  understand  your  ladyship.  'Pon  my  word,  my  lady, 
I  prefer  them  both.  The  dancing  is  most  uncommon  superior; 
though  I  must  say,  my  lady,  the  lady  dancers  there  do  most 
uncommonly — rather,  I  should  say  "—He  stopped  abruptly ; 
his  face  flushed,  and  he  felt  as  if  he  had  burst  into  a  perspira- 
tion. What  the  deuce  was  he  about  ?  It  seemed  as  if  some 
devil  within  were  urging  him  on,  from  time  to  time,  to  com- 
mit himself.  Good  gracious !  another  word,  and  out  would 
have  come  his  opinion  as  to  the  shocking  indecency  of  the 
ballet! 

"  I  understand  you,  sir  ;  I  quite  agree  with  you,"  said  Lady 
Cecilia  calmly;  "the  ballet  does  come  on  at  a  sad  late  hour; 


ing  at  the  plank  ______    ______ 

meant—  nothing  else,  upon  my  soul,  your  ladyship. 

"Do  you  intend  taking  a  box  there,  Mr.  Titmouse  ?"  in- 
quired her  ladyship,  with  an  appearance  of  interest  in  the  ex- 


"  Why,  your  ladyship,  they  say  a  box  there  is  a  precious 
long  figure  ;—  but  in  course,  my  lady,  when  I've  got  to  rights 
a  little  with  my  property—  your  ladyship  understands—  I  shall 
do  the  correct  thing." 

Here  a  very  long  pause  ensued.  How  dismally  quiet  and 
deliberate  was  everything!  The  very  servants,  how  noise- 
lessly they  waited!  Everything  done  just  when  it  was 
wanted,  yet  no  hurry,  or  bustle,  or  noise  ;  and  they  looked  sq 


430  TEN  THOUSAND  A-YEAB. 

composed — so  much  at  their  ease.  He  fancied  that  they  had 
scarce  anything  else  to  do  than  look  at  him,  and  watch  all 
his  movements,  which  greatly  embarrassed  him,  and  he  be- 
gan to  hate  them.  He  tried  hard  to  inspirit  himself  with  a 
reflection  upon  his  own  suddenly  acquired  and  really  great 
personal  importance ;  absolute  master  of  Ten  Thousand  a- 
Year,  a  relation  of  the  great  man  at  whose  table  he  sat,  and 
whose  hired  servants  they  were;  but  then  his  timorously 
raised  eye  would  light,  for  instance,  upon  the  splendid  in- 
signia of  the  Earl ;  and  he  felt  as  oppressed  as  ever.  What 
would  he  not  have  given  for  a  few  minutes'  interval  and  sense 
of  complete  freedom  and  independence  ?  And  were  these  to 
be  his  feelings  ever  hereafter  ?  Was  this  the  sort  of  tremu- 
lous apprehension  of  offense,  and  embarrassment  as  to  his 
every  move,  to  which  he  was  to  be  doomed  in  high  life  ?  Oh 
that  he  had  but  been  born  to  it,  like  the  Earl  and  the  Lady 
Cecilia ! 

"  Were  you  ever  in  the  House  of  Lords,  Mr.  Titmouse  ?  " 
inquired  Lord  Dreddington  sdddenly,  after  casting  about  for 
some  little  time  for  a  topic  on  which  he  might  converse  with 
Titmouse. 

"  Xo,  my  lord,  never— should  most  uncommon  like  to  see 
it,  my  loro.  " — replied  Titmonse  eagerly. 

"  Certainly,  it  is  an  impressive  spectacle,  sir,  and  well  worth 
seeing." 

"'  I  suppose,  my  lord,  your  lordship  goes  there  every  day  ?  " 

"  Why,  sir,  I  believe  lam  pretty  punctual  in  my  attendance. 
I  was  there  to-day,  sir,  till  the  House  rose.  Sir,  I  am  of  opinion 
that  hereditary  legislators — a  practical  anomaly  in  a  free  state 
like  this— but  one  which  has  innumerable  unperceived  ad- 
vantages to  recommend  it — Sir,  our  country  expects  at  our 
hands,  in  discharge  of  so  grave  a  trust— in  short,  if  we  were  not 
to  be  true  to — we  who  are  in  a  peculiar  sense  the  guardians 
of  public  liberty —  if  we  were  once  to  betray  our  trust— Let 

me  trouble  you,  sir,  for  a  little  of  that ,"  said  the  Earl, 

using  some  foreign  word  which  Titmouse  had  never  heard 
of  before,  and  looking  towards  a  delicately  constructed 
fabric,  as  of  compressed  snow,  that  stood  before  Tit- 
mouse, a  servant  stood  in  a  twinkling  beside  him  with 
his  lordship's  plate.  Ah  me!  that  I  should  have  to 
relate  *  so  sad  an  event  as  presently  occurred  to  Tit- 
mouse !  He  took  a  spoon  ;  and,  imagining  the  glistening 
fabric  before  him  to  be  as  solid  as  it  looked,  brought  to  bear 
upon  it  an  adequate  degree  of  force,  even  as  if  he  had  been 

going  to  scoop  out  a  piece  of  Stilton  cheese— and  inserting 
is  spoon  at  tne  summit  of  the  snowy  and  deceitful  structure* 
souse  to  the  bottom  went  spoon,  hand,  coat^uff  and  all,  and 
a  very  dismal  noise  evidenced  that  the  dish  on  which  the 
spoon  had  descended  with  so  much  force— was  no  longer  a 
dish.  It  was,  in  fact,  broken  in  halves,  and  the  liquid  from, 
within  ran  about  on  the  cloth  *  *  *  *  A  cluster  of  ser- 


TEN  THOUSAND  A-YEAR.  431 

Vants  was  quickly  around  him.  *  *  A  mist  came  over  his 
eyes;  the  color  deserted  his  cheek ;  and  he  had  a  strange  feel- 
ing, as  if  verily  the  end  of  all  things  was  at  hand. 

"  I  beg  you  will  think  nothing  of  it— it  really  signifies 
nothing  at  all,  Mr.  Titmouse,"  said  the  earl  kindly,  observing 
his  agitation. 

"  Oh  dear !  Oh  my  lord— your  ladyship— what  an  uncom- 
mon stupid  ass!" 

"  Pray  don't  distress  yourself ?  Mr.  Titmouse,"  said  Lady 
Cecilia,  really  feeling  for  his  evident  misery,  "  or  you  will 
distress  ws." 

"I  beg— humbly  beg  pardon— please  your  lordship— your 
ladyship.  I'll  replace  it  with  the  best  in  London  the  very 
first  thing  in  the  morning."  Here  the  servant  beside  him, 
who  was  arranging  the  table-cloth,  uttered  a  faint  sound  of 
suppressed  laughter,  which  disconcerted  Titmouse  still 
more. 


..  _w    .  __  -expense 

object. — I  know  the  very  best  shop  in  Oxford  Street- 


"  Suppose  we  take  a  glass  of  champagne  together,  Mr.  Tit- 
mouse ?  "  said  the  Earl  rather  peremptorily ;  and  Titmouse 
had  sense  enough  to  be  aware  that  he  was  to  drop  the  sub- 
ject. It  was  a  good  while  before  he  recovered  even  the  lit- 
tle degree  of  self-possession  which  he  had  had  since  first  en- 
tering Lord  Dreddlington's  house.  He  bad  afterwards  no 
very  distinct  recollection  of  the  manner  in  which  he-  got 
through  the  rest  of  dinner,  but  a  general  sense  of  his  having 
been  treated  with  the  most  kind  and  delicate  forbearance- 
no  fuss  made.  Suppose  such  an  accident  had  occurred  at 
Satin  Lodge,  or  even  Alibi  House  ! 

Shortly  after  the  servants  had  withdrawn,  Lady  Cecilia 
rose  to  retire.  Titmouse,  seeing  the  Earl  approaching  the 
bell,  anticipated  him  in  ringing  it,  and  then  darted  to  the 
door  with  the  speed  of  a  lamplighter  to  open  it,  as  he  did, 
just  before  a  servant  had  raised  nis  hand  to  it  on  the  out- 
side. Then  he  stood  within,  and  the  servant  with  out,  each 
bowing,  and  Lady  Cecilia  passed  between  them  with  statelv 
step,  her  eyes  fixed  upon  the  ground,  and  her  iip  compressed, 
with  the  effort  to  check  her  inclination  to  a  smile— perhaps, 
even  laughter.  Titmouse  was  now  left  alone  with  Lord 
Dreddlington ;  and,  on  resuming  his  seat,  most  earnestly  re- 
newed his  entreaties  to  be  allowed  to  replace  the  dish  which 
he  had  broken,  assuring  Lord  Dreddlington  that  "money 
was  no  object  at  all."  He  was  encountered,  however,  with 
so  stern  a  negative  by  his  lordship,  that,  with  a  hurried 
apology,  he  dropped  the  subiect ;  the  Earl,  however,  good- 
naturedly  adding,  that  he  had  perceived  the  joke  intended 
by  Mr.  Titmouse— which  was  certainly  a  very  good  one  I 


432  TEN  THOUSAND  A-YEAR. 

This  would  have  set  off  poor  Titmouse  again :  but  a  glance 
at  the  face  of  his  magnificent  host  sealed  his  lips. 

"I  have  heard  it  said,  Mr.  Titmouse,"  presently  com- 
menced the  Earl,  "  that  you  have  been  engaged  in  mercan- 
tile pursuits  during  the  period  of  your  exclusion  from  the 
estates  which  you  have  just  recovered.  It  it  so,  sir  ?  " 

"  Ye-e-e-s — sir — my  lord—"  replied  Titmouse,  hastily  con- 
sidering whether  or  not  he  should  altogether  sink  the  shop  ; 
but  he  dared  hardly  venture  upon  so  very  decisive  a  lie — "  I 
was,  please  your  lordship,  in  one  of  the  greatest  establish- 
ments in  the  mercery  line  in  London— at  the  west  end,  my 
lord;  most  confidential,  my  lord;  management  of  every- 
thing ;  but,  somehow,  my  lord,  I  never  took  to  it— your  lord- 
ship understands  ?  " 

"  Perfectly,  sir ;  I  can  quite  appreciate  your  feelings.  But, 
sir,  the  mercantile  interests  of  this  great  country  are  not  to 
be  overlooked.  Those  who  are  concerned  in  them,  are  fre- 
quently respectable  persons." 

"Begging  pardon,  my  lord— no  they  a'n't— if  your  lordship 
only  knew  them  as  well  as  I  do,  my  lord.  Most  uncommon 
low  people.  Do  anything  to  turn  a  penny,  my  lord ;  and 
often  sell  damaged  goods  for  best." 

"  It  is  very  possible,  sir,  that  there  may  exist  irregularities, 
eccentricities,  ha !  ha !  of  that  description ;  but  upon  the 
whole,  sir,  I  am  disposed  to  think  that  there  are  many  very 
decent  persons  engaged  in  trade.  I  have  had  the  happiness, 
sir,  to  assist  in  passing  measures  that  were  calculated,  by 
removing  restrictions  and  protective  duties,  to  secure  to  this 
country  the  benefits  of  free  and  universal  competition.  We 
have  been  proceeding,  sir,  for  many  years,  on  altogether  a 
wrong  principle  ;  but,  not  to  follow  out  this  matter  further, 
I  must  remind  you?  sir,  that  your  acquaintance  with  the 
principles  and  leading  details  of  mercantile  transactions — 
undoubtedly  one  of  the  mainsprings  of  the  national  great- 
ness—may hereafter  be  of  use  to  you,  sir." 

"  Yes,  my  lord,  'pon  my  soul — when  I'm  furnishing  my 
houses  in  town  and  country,  I  mean  to  go  to  market  myself 
— please  your  lordship,  I  know  a  trick  or  two  of  the  trade, 
and  can't  be  taken  in,  my  lord.  For  instance,  my  lord, 
there's  Tag-rag— a-hem  !  hem  !  "  he  paused  abruptly,  and 
looked  somewhat  confusedly  at  the  Earl. 

"  I  did  not  mean  that  exactly,"  said  his  lordship,  unable  to 
resist  a  smile.  "  Pray,  fill  your  glass,  Mr.  Titmouse."  He 
did  so.  "  You  are  of  course  aware  that  you  have  the  absolute 
patronage  of  the  borongh  of  Yatton,  Mr.  Titmouse  ?— It  oc- 
curs to  me,  that  as  our  political  opinions  agree,  and  unless  I 


"  Exactly,  my  lord — 'pon  my  soul,  it's  all  correct,  my  lord.' 


TEN  THOUSAND  A-YEAB.  433 

"  Well— then,  sir— the  family  interests,  Mr.  Titmouse,  must 
be  looked  after " 

"  Oh !  in  course,  my  lord,  only  too  happy— certainly,  my 
lord,  we  shall,  I  hope,  make  a  very  interesting  family,  if  your 
lordship  so  pleases— I  can  have  no  objection,  my  lord !  " 

"  It  was  a  vile,  a  disgraceful  trick,  by  which  Ministers 
popped  in  their  own  man  for  our  borough,  Mr.  Titmouse." 

[Lord  Dreddlington  alluded  to  the  circumstance  of  a  new 
writ  having  been  moved  for,  immediately  on  Mr.  Aubrey's 
acceptance  of  the  Chiltern  Hundreds,  and,  before  the  Opposi- 
tion could  be  prepared  for  such  a  step,  sent  down  without 
delay  to  Yatton,  and  Sir  Percival  Pickering,  Bart.,  of  Lud- 
dington  Court,  an  intimate  friend  of  Mr.  Aubrey's,  and  a 
keen  unflinching  Tory,  being  returned  as  member,  before  the 
Titmouse  influence  could  be  brought  for  even  one  moment 
into  the  field ;  the  few  and  willing  electors  of  that  ancient 
and  loyal  borough  being  only  too  happy  to  have  the  oppor- 
tunity of  voting  for  a  man  whose  principles  they  approved — 
probably  the  last  opportunity  they  would  have  of  doing  so  ] 

"  Yes,  my  lord — Sir  what-d'ye-call-him  was  a  trifle  too 
sharp  for  us,  in  that  business,  wasn't  he?  " 

"  It  has  succeeded,  sir,  for  the  moment,  but "— continued 
his  lordship  in  a  very  significant  and  stately  manner — "  it  is 
quite  possible  thet  their  triumph  may  be  of  very  short  dura- 
tian — Mr.  Titmouse.  Those  who,  like  myself,  are  at  head- 
quarters— let  me  see  you  fill  your  glass,  Mr.  Titmouse.— I 
have  the  honor  to  congratulate  you,  sir  on  the  recovery  of 
your  rights,  and  to  wish  you  health  and  long  life  in  the  en- 
joyment of  them,"  quoth  the  Earl  with  an  air  of  the  loftiest 
urbanity. 

"  May  it  please  your  lordship,  your  lordship's  most  un- 
common polite  " — commenced  Titmouse,  rising  and  standing 
while  he  spoke — for  he  had  had  experience  enough  of  society, 
to  be  aware  that  when  a  gentleman's  health  is  drunk  on  im- 
portant occasions,  it  becomes  him  to  rise  and  acknowledge 
the  compliment  in  such  language  as  he  can  command—"  and 
am  particularly  proud— a— a— I  beg  to  propose,  my  lord,  your 
lordship's  very  superior  good  health,  and  many  thanks." 
Then  he  sat  down  ;  each  poured  out  another  glass  of  claret, 
and  Titmouse  drank  his  off. 

"  It  is  extremely  singular,  sir,"  said  the  Earl  musingly,  after 
a  considerable  pause,  "  the  reverses  in  life  that  one  hears  of !" 

[I  cannot  help  pausing,  for  a  moment,  to  suggest— what 
must  have  become  of  the  Earl  and  his  daughter,  had  they  been 
placed  hi  the  situation  of  the  unfortunate  Aubreys.] 

"  Yes,  my  lord,  your  lordship's  quite  true,  'pon  my  word ! 
— Most  uncommon  ups  and  doicns  !  Lord,  my  lord,  only  to 
fancy  me,  a  few  months  ago,  trotting  up  and  down  Oxford 
Street  with  my  yard  mea- — "  He  stopped  short,  and  colored 
violently. 

"  Well,  sir,"  replied  the  Earl,  with  an  expression  of  bland 


434  TEN  THOUSAND  A-YEAE. 

and  dignified  sympathy—"  however  humble  might  have  been 
your  circumstances,  it  is  a  consolation  to  reflect  that  the  fates 
ordained  it.  Sir,  there  is  nothing  dishonorable  in  being  poor, 
when— you  cannot  help  it!  Reverses  of  fortune,  sir,  have 
happened  to  some  of  the  greatest  characters  in  our  history. 
You  remember  Alfred,  sir !  "  Titmouse  bowed  assentingly ; 
but  had  he  been  questioned,  could  have  told,  I  suspect,  as  little 
about  the  matter— as  the  Earl  himself. 

"  Allow  me,  sir,  to  ask  whether  you  have  come  to  any  ar- 
rangement with  your  late  opponent  concerning  the  back- 
rents  ? "  enquired  the  Earl,  with  a  great  appearance  of  in- 
terest. 

"  No  my  lord,  not  yet ;  but  my  solicitors  say  they'll  soon 
have  the  screip  on,  please  your  lordship — that's  just  what 
they  say — their  very  words. 

"Indeed,  sir ! "  replied  the  Earl  gravely.  "  What  is  the  sum 
to  which  they  say  you  are  entitled,  sir  ?  " 

"Sixty  thousand  pounds,  my  lord,  at  least — quite  set  me  up 
at  starting,  my  lord,  "  replied  Titmouse  with  great  glee ;  but 
the  Earl  shuddered  involuntarily  for  a  moment,  and  sipped 
his  wine  in  silence. 

"  By  the  way,  Mr.  Titmouse,"  said  he,  after  a  considerable 
pause — "  I  trust  you  will  forgive  me  for  suggesting  whether 
it  would  not  be  a  prudent  step  for  you  to  go  to  one  of  the 
universities  for  at  least  a  twelvemonth " 

"  Humbly  begging  your  lordship's  pardon,  am  not  I  too 
old  ?  I've  neard  they're  all  a  pack  of  overgrown  school-boys 
there — and  learn  nothing  but  a  bit  of  some  old  languages  that 
a'n't  the  least  use  now-a-days,  seeing  it  a'n't  spoke  now,  any- 
where"—replied  Titmouse — "  Besides,  I've  talked  the  thing 
over  with  Mr.  Gammon,  my  lord " 

"  Mr.  Gammon  ?    Allow  me,  sir,  to  ask  who  that  may  be  ?  " 

"  One  of  my  solicitors,  my  lord  ;  a  most  remarkable  clever 
man,  and  an  out-and-out  lawyer,  my  lord.  It  was  he  that 
found  out  all  about  my  case,  my  lord.  If  your  lordship  was 
only  to  see  him  for  a  moment,  your  lordship  would  say  what 
a  remarkable  clever  man  that  is  !  w 

"  You  will  forgive  my  curiosity,  sir— but  it  must  have  surely 
required  very  ample  means  to  have  carried  on  so  arduous  a 
lawsuit  as  that  which  has  "just  terminated  so  successfully? '' 

"Oh  yes,  my  lord !— Quirk,  Gammon,  and  Snap  did  all  that ; 
and,  between  me  and  your  lordship,  I  suppose  I  shall  have  to 
come  down  a  pretty  long  figure,  all  on  the  nail,  as  your  lord- 
ship understands ;  but  I  mean  them  to  get  it  all  out  of  that 
respectable  gent,  Mr.  Aubrey."— By  quietly  pressing  his 
questions,  the  Earl  got  a  good  deal  more  out  of  Titmouse 
than  he  was  aware  of,  concerning  Messrs.  Quirk,  Gammon, 
and  Snap ;  and  conceived  a  special  dislike  for  Gammon.  The 
Earl  gave  him  some  pretty  dicisive  hints  about  the  necessity 
of  being  on  his  guard  with  such  people— and  hoped  tfeat  he 
would  not  commit  himself  to  anything  important  without 


TEN  THOUSAND  A-TEAR.  435 

consulting  his  lordship,  who  would  of  course  give  him  the 
advantage  of  his  experience  in  the  affairs  of  the  world,  and 
open  his  eyes  to  the  designs  of  those  whose  only  object  was 
to  make  a  prey  of  him.  Titmouse  began  to  feel  that  here,  at 
length,  he  had  met  with  a  real  friend— one  whose  suggestions 
were  worthy  of  being  received  with  the  prof oundest  deference. 
Soon  afterwards,  he  had  the  good  fortune  to  please  the  Earl 
beyond  expression,  by  venturing  timidly  t9  express  his  ad- 
miration of  the  splendid  ribbon  worn  by  his  lordship ;  who 
took  the  opportunity  of  explaining  that  and  the  other  marks 
of  distinction  he  wore,  and  9thers  which  he  was  entitled  to 
wear,  at  great  length  and  with  much  minuteness— so  as  that 
he  at  length  caused  Titmouse  to  believe  that  he,  Lord  Dred- 
dlingtqn — the  august  head  of  family — must  have  rendered 
more  signal  service,  somehow  or  other,  to  his  country,  and 
also  done  more  to  win  the  admiration  and  gratitude  of  foreign 
countries,  than  most  men  living.  His  lordship  might  not, 
perhaps,  have  intended  it ;  but  he  went  on  till  he  almost 
DEIFIED  himself  in  the  estimation  of  his  little  listener ;  —One 
very  natural  question  was  perpetually  trembling  on  the  tip  of 
Titmouse's  tongue;  viz.  how  and  when  he  could  get  such 
things  for  himself. 

"  Well,  Mr.  Titmouse,"  at  length  observed  the  Earl,  after 
looking  at  his  watch— "shall  we  adjourn  to  the  drawing 
room?  The  fact  is,  sir,  that  Lady  Cecilia  and  I  have  an 
evening  engagment  at  the  Duchess  of  Diamond's.  I  much 
regret  being  unable  to  take  you  with  us,  sir ;  but,  as  it  is, 
shall  we  rejoin  the  Lady  Cecilia  ?"  continued  his  lordship, 
rising.  Up  jumped  Titmouse;  and  the  Earl  and  he  were 
soon  in  the  drawing-room,  where,  besides  the  Lady  Cecilia, 
sat  another  lady,  to  whom  he  was  not  introduced  in  any  way. 
This  was  Miss  Macspleuchan,  a  distant  connection  of  the 
Earl's  late  countess— a  very  poor  relation,  who  had  entered 
the  house  of  the  Earl  of  Dreddlington,  in  order  to  eat  the 
bitter,  bitter  bread  of  dependence.  Poor  soul !  you  might  tell, 
by  a  glance  at  her,  that  she  did  not  thrive  upon  it.  She  was 
about  thirty,  and  so  thin !  She  was  dressed  in  plain  white 
muslin ;  and  there  was  a  manifest  constraint  and  timidity 
about  her  motions,  and  a  depression  in  her  countenance, 
whose  lineaments  showed  that  if  she  could  be  happy  she 
might  be  handsome.  She  had  a  most  ladylike  air ;  and  there 
was  thought  in  her  brow  and  acuteness  in  her  eye,  which 
however,  as  it  were,  habitually  watched  the  motions  of  the 
Earl  and  the  Lady  Cecilia  with  deference  and  anxiety.  Poor 
Miss  Macspleuchan  felt  herself  gradually  sinking  into  a 
sycophant;  the  alternative  being  that  or  starvation.  She 
was  very  accomplished,  particularly  in  music  and  languages, 
while  the  Lady  Cecilia  really  knew  scarcely  anything— tor 
which  reason,  principally,  she  had  long  ago  conceived  a  bitter 
dislike  to  Miss  Macspleuchan,  and  inflicted  on  her  a  number 
of  petty  but  exquisite  mortifications  and  indignities ;  such, 


436  TEN  THOUSAND  A-TEAE. 

perhaps,  as  none  but  a  sensitive  soul  could  appreciate,  for 
the  Earl  and  his  daughter  were  exemplary  persons  in  the  pro- 
prieties of  life,  and  would  not  do  such  things  openly.  She 
was  a  sort  of  companion  of  Lady  Cecilia,  and  entirely  de- 
pendent upon  her  and  the  Earl  for  her  subsistence.  She  was 
sitting  on  the  sofa,  beside  Lady  Cecilia,  when  Titmouse  re- 
entered  the  drawing-room;  and  Lady  Cecilia  eyed  him 
through  her  glass  with  infinite  nonchalance,  even  when  he 
had  advanced  to  within  a  few  feet  of  her.  He  made  her,  as 
she  rose  to  take  her  seat  and  prepare  tea,  a  most  obsequious 
bow :  absurd  as  was  the  style  of  its  performance,  Miss  Mac- 
spleuchan  saw  that  there  was  politeness  in  the  intention ; 
'twas  moreover  a  courtesy  towards  herself,  that  was  unusual 
from  the  Earl's  guests  ;  and  these  considerations  served  to 
take  off  the  edge  of  the  ridicule  and  contempt  with  which 
Lady  Cecilia  had  been  preparing  her  to  receive  their  newly 
discovered  kinsman.  After  standing  for  a  second  or  two 
near  the  sofa,  Titmouse  ventured  to  sit  himself  down  upon 
it — on  the  very  edge  only— as  if  afraid  of  disturbing  Lady 
Cecilia,  who  was  reclining  on  it  with  an  air  of  languid  hauteur. 

"  So  you're  going,  my  lady,  to  a  dance  to-night,  as  my  lord 
says?  "quoth  Titmouse  respectfully ;  "  hope  your  ladyship 
will  enjoy  yourself !  " 

"  We  regret  that  you  do  not  accompany  us,  Mr.  Titmouse," 
said  Lady  Cecilia,  slightly  inclining  towards  him,  and  glanc- 
ing at  Miss  Macspleuchan  with  a  faint  and  bitrer  smile. 

"  Should  have  been  most  uncommon  proud  to  have  gone, 
your  ladyship,"  replied  Titmouse,  as  a  servant  brought  him 
a  cup  of  tea.  "  These  cups  and  saucers,  my  lady,  come  from 
abroad,  I  suppose  ?  Now,  I  dare  say,  though  they've  rather 
a  funny  look,  they  cost  a  good  deal  ?  " 

"  I  really  do  not  know,  sir ;  we  have  had  them  a  very  long 

i    *T       «*  *  * 

while. 

"  'Pon  my  life,  my  lady,  I  like  them  amazing !  "  Seeing 
her  ladyship  not  disposed  to  talk,  Titmouse  became  silent. 

"  Are"  you  fond  01  music,  Mr.  Titmouse  ? "  inquired  the 
Earl,  presently,  observing  the  pause  in  the  conversation  to 
become  embarrassing  to  Titmouse. 
"  Very,  indeed,  my  lord ;  is  your  lordship?" 
"I  am  rather  fond  of  vocal  music,  sir — of  the  opera." 
This  the  Earl  said,  because  Miss  Macspleucnan  played 
upon  the  piano  very  brilliantly,  and  did  not  sing.  Miss  Mac- 
spleuchan understood  him. 

"Do  you  play  upon  any  instrument,  Mr.  Titmouse  ?"  in- 
quired Lady  Cecilia,  with  a  smile  lurking  about  her  lips, 
which  increased  a  little  when  Titmouse  replied  in  the  nega- 
tive, that  he  had  once  begun  to  learn  the  clarionet  some 
years  ago,  but  could  not  manage  the  notes.  "  Excuse  me, 
iny  lady,  but  what  an  uncommon  fine  piano  that  is  !  "  said 
he.  "  If  I  may  make  go  bold,  will  your  ladyship  give  us  a 
tune?'? 


TEN  THOUSAND  A-YEAR.  437 

"  I  dare  say,  Miss  Macspleuchan  will  play  for  you,  Mr  Tit- 
mouse, if  you  wish  it,"  replied  Lady  Cecilia,  coldly. 

home  time  afterwards,  a  servant  announced  to  her  lady- 
ship  and  the  Earl  that  the  carriage  was  at  the  door ;  and 
presently  they  both  retired  to  their  dressing-rooms  to  make 
slight  alteration  in  their  dress ;  the  Earl  to  add  a  foreign 
order  or  two,  and  Lady  Cecilia  to  place  upon  her  haughty 
brow  a  small  tiara  of  brilliants.  As  soon  as  they  had  retired 
—  I  shall  teel  great  pleasure,  sir,  in  playing  for  you,  if  you 
wish  it  ?"  said  Miss  Macspleuchan,  in  a  voice  of  such  min- 
gled melancholy  and  kindness  as  must  have  gone  toTitmouse's 
heart,  if  he  had  possessed  one.  He  jumped  up,  and  bowed 
profoundly.  She  sat  down  to  the  piano,  and  played  with 
great  ease  and  brilliancy  such  music  as  she  supposed  would 
suit  her  auditor— namely,  waltzes  and  marches— till  the  door 
opened,  and  Lady  Cecilia  re-appeared,  drawing  on  her  gloves, 
with  the  glittering  addition  which  I  have  mentioned— fol- 
lowed presently  by  the  Earl. 

"  Well,  sir,"  said  he,  with  dignified  affability.  "  T  need  not 
repeat  how  highly  gratified  I  feel  at  our  introduction  to  each 
other.  I  trust  you  will  henceforth  consider  yourself  no 
stranger  here " 

"Oh, 'pon  my  life,  my  lord!''  exclaimed  Titmouse,  in  a 
low  tone,  and  with  a  sudden  and  profound  bow. 

"  And  that  on  your  return  from  Yorkshire,"  continued  the 
Earl,  drawing  on  his  gloves,  "  you  will  let  us  see  you :  we 
both  feel  great  interest  in  your  good  fortunes.  Sir,  I  have 
the  honor  to  wish  you  a  good  evening!"  He  extended  his 
gloved  hand  to  Mr.  Titmouse,  whose  hand,  however,  he 
touched  with  little  more  than  the  ends  of  his  fingers. 

"  We  exceedingly  regret  that  we  must  leave  you,  Mr.  Tit- 
mouse," said  Lady  Cecilia  with  forced  seriousness ;  "  but  as 
we  wish  to  leave  the  duchess's  early,  in  order  to  go  to  an- 
other ball,  we  must  go  early.  Good  evening,  sir,"  and  hav- 
ing dropped  him  a  slight  formal  curtsey,  she  quitted  the 
drawing-room  followed  by  the  Earl,  Titmouse  making  four 
or  five  such  bows  as  provoked  a  smile  from  all  who  witness- 
ed them.  The  next  moment  he  was  alone  with  Miss  Mac- 
•  spleuchan.  Her  unaffected  good-natured  address  made  him 
'  feel  more  at  home  within  the  next  five  minutes,  than  he  had 
been  since  entering  that  frigid  scene  of  foolish  state — since 
being  in  the  oppressive  presence  of  the  greatness  just  depart- 
ed. She  felt  at  first  a  contempt  for  him  bordering  upon  dis- 
gust, but  which  very  soon  melted  into  pity.  What  a  wretch- 
ed creature  was  this  to  be  put  into  such  a  dazzling  position ! 
He  soon  got  pretty  communicative  with  her,  and  told  her 
about  the  Tag-rags,  Miss  Tag-rag,  and  Miss  Quirk,  both  of 
whom  were  absolutely  dying  of  love  for  him,  and  thought  he 
was  in  love  with  them,  which  was  not  the  case— far  from  it. 
Then  he  hinted  something  about  a  most  particular  uncom. 
jnon  lovetl  j1;  ffal  that  had  his  heart,  and  he  hoped  to  have  hers, 


438  TEN  THOUSAND  A-YEAR. 

as  soon  as  he  had  got  all  to  rights  at  Yatton.  Then  he  told 
her  of  the  great  style  in  which  he  was  going  down  to  take 
possession  of  his  estates.  Having  finished  this,  he  told  her 
that  he  had  been  the  morning  before  to  see  a  man  hanged 
for  murdering  his  wife  ;  that  he  had  been  into  the  condemn- 
ed cell,  and  then  into  the  press-room,  and  had  seen  his  hands 
and  arms  tied,  and  shaken  hands  with  him  ;  and  he  was  go- 
ing on  into  such  a  sickening  minuteness  of  detail,  that  to 
avoid  it  Miss  Macspleuchan,  who  felt  both  shocked  and  dis- 
gusted, suddenly  asked  him  if  he  was  fond  of  heraldry,  and 
rising  from  the  sofa,  she  went  into  the  second  room,  where, 
on  an  elegant  and  antique  stand  lay  a  huge  roll  of  parch- 
ment, on  a  gilded  stand,  splendidly  mounted  and  most 
superbly  illuminated — it  was  about  three-quarters  of  a  yard 
in  breadth,  and  some  ten  or  twenty  yards  in  length.  This 
was  the  Pedigree  of  the  Dreddlingtons.  She  was  giving  him 
an  account  of  Simon  de  Drelincourt,  an  early  ancestor  of  the 
Earl's,  who  had  come  over  with  William  the  Conqueror,  and 
performed  stupendous  feats  of  valor  at  the  battle  of  Hast- 
ings, Titmouse  listening  in  open-mouthed  wonder,  and 
almost  trembling  to  think  that  he  had  broken  a  valuable 
dish  belonging  to  a  nobleman  who  had  such  wonderful  an- 
cestors, not  at  the  moment  adverting  to  the  circumstance  that 
he  was  himself  descended  from  the  same  ancestors,  and  had 
as  rich  blood  in  him  as  the  Earl  and  Lady  Cecilia — when  a 
servant  entered  and  informed  him  in  a  whisper  that  "  his 
carriage  had  arrived."  He  considered  that  etiquette  requir- 
ed him  to  depart  immediately, 

"Beg  your  pardon ;  but  if  ever  you  should  come  down  to 
my  estate  in  the  country,  shall  be  most  uncommon  proud  to 
see  your  ladyship." 

"  I  beg  your  pardon ;  you  are  mistaken,  sir,"  interrupted 
Miss  Macspleuchan  hastily,  and  blushing  scarlet;  the  fact 
being  that  Titmouse  had  not  caught  her  name  on  its  having 
been  once  or  twice  pronounced  by  Lady  Cecilia,  and  very 
naturally  concluding  that  she  also  must  be  a  lady  of  rank. 
Titmouse  was,  however,  so  occupied  with  his  efforts  to  make 
a  graceful  exit,  that  he  did  not  catch  the  explanation  of  his 
mistake ;  and  bowing  almost  down  to  the  ground,  reached 
the  landing,  where  the  tall  servant,  with  a  very  easy  grace, 
gave  him  his  hat  and  cane,  and  preceded  him  downstairs. 
As  he  descended,  he  felt  in  his  pockets  for  some  loose  silver, 
and  gave  several  shillings  between  the  servants  who  stood 
in  the  hall  to  witness  his  departure ;  after  which,  one  of 
them  having  opened  the  door  and  let  down  the  steps  of  the 
glass  coach,  Titmouse  popped  into  it. 

"  Home,  sir  ?  "  inquired  the  servant,  as  he  closed  the  door. 

"  The  Cabbage-Stalk  Hotel,  Covent  Garden,"  replied  Tit> 
mouse. 

That  was  communicated  to  the  coachman,  and  off  rumbled 
the  glass  coach.  As  soon  as  Titmouse  had  become  calm 


TEN  THOUSAND  A-YEA&.  439 

enough  to  reflect  upon  the  events  of  the  evening,  he  came  to 
the  conclusion  that  the  Earl  of  Dreddlington  was  a  very  great 
man  indeed;  the  Lady  Cecilia  was  very  beautiful,  but  rather 
proud  ;  and  Miss  Macspleuchan  (Lady  Somebody,  as  he  sup- 
posed) one  of  the  most  interesting  ladies  he  had  ever  met 
with,  something  uncommon  pleasing  about  her  ;  in  short,  he 
felt  a  sort  of  grateful  attachment  towards  her,  which,  how 
long  it  would  have  lasted  after  he  had  heard  that  she  was 
only  a  plain  miss,  and  a  poor  relative,  I  leave  the  accute  reader 
to  conjecture. 


CHAPTER  XIX. 

MR.  GAMMON  was  with  him  about  half-past  nine  o'clock  the 
next  morning,  sufficiently  anxious  to  hear  how  he  had  got 
overnight.  He  was  received  by  Titmouse  in  a  manner  to- 
tally different  from  that  in  which  he  had  ever  before 
been  received  by  him  ;  and  concluded  for  a  few  minutes,  that 
Lord  Dreddlington  had  been  pumping  Titmouse,  had  learn- 
ed from  him  his  position  with  respect  to  him,  Gammon,  in 
particular,  and  had  .injected  distrust  and  suspicion  into  the 
mind  of  Titmouse  concerning  him.  But  Gammon,  with  all 
his  acuteness,  was  quite  mistaken.  The  truth  was,  'twas 
only  attempt  on  the  part  of  poor  Titmouse  to  assume  the 
composed  demeanor,  the  languid  elegance,  which  he  had 
observed  in  the  distinguished  personages  with  whom  he  had 
spent  the  preceding  evening,  and  which  had  made  a  very 
deep  impression  on  his  mind.  He  drawled  out  his  words, 
looked  as  if  he  were  half  asleep,  and  continually  addressed 
Gammon  as  "  Sir,"  and  "  Mr.  Gammon,"  just  as  the  Earl  of 
Dreddlington  had  constantly  addressed  him — Titmouse.  Our 
'  friend  was  sitting  at  breakfast,  on  the  present  occasion,  in 
a  most  gaudy  dressing-gown,  and  with  the  newspaper  before 
him ;  in  short,  his  personal  appearance  and  manner  were 
totally  different  from  what  Gammon  had  ever  seen  before, 
and  he  looked  now  and  then  at  Titmouse,  as  if  for  a  moment 
doubting  his  identity.  Whether  or  not  he  was  now  on  the 
point  of  throwing  overboard  those  who  had  piloted  him  from 
amidst  the  shoals  of  poverty  into  the  open  sea  of  affluence, 
shone  upon  by  the  vivid  sunlight  of  rank  and  distinction, 
Gammon  did  not  know ;  but  he  contracted  his  brow,  and 
assumed  a  certain  sternness  and  peremptoriness  of  tone  and 
bearing,  which  were  not  long  in  reducing  Titmouse  to  his 
proper  dimensions  ;  and  when  at  length  Mr.  Gammon  enter- 
ed upon  the  delightful  subject  of  the  morrow's  expedition, 
telling  him  that  he,  Gammon,  had  now  nearly  completed  all 
the  preparations  for  going  down  to,  and  taking  possession  of 
Yatton  in  a  style  of  suitable  splendor,  according  to  the  wish 


440  TEN  THOUSAND  A-YEAE. 

of  Titmpuse— this  quickly  melted  away  the  thin  coating  of 
mannerism,  and  Titmouse  was  "  himself  again."  He  immedi- 
ately gave  Mr.  Gammon  a  full  account  of  what  had  happened 
at  Lord  Dreddlington's,  and,  I  fear,  of  a  greal  deal  more  than 
might  possibly  have  happened,  but  certainly  had  not ;  e.g 
his  lordship's  special  laudation  of  Mr.  Gammon  as  a  "  mons- 
trous fine  lawyer,"  which  Titmouse  swore  were  the  very 
exact  words  of  his  lordship,  and  that  "  he  should  have  been 
most  happy  to  see  Mr.  Gammon,"  and  a  good  deal  to  the 
like  effect.  Also  that  he  had  been  "  most  uncommon  thick  " 
with  u  Lady  Cicely,"  (so  he  pronounced  her  name ;)  and  that 
both  she  and  Lord  I)reddlmgton  had  "  pressed  him  very 
hard  "  to  go  with  them  to  a  ball  at  a  duke's  /  "  He  made  no 
mention  of  the  broken  trifle  dish  ;  said  they  had  nearly  a 
dozen  servants  to  wait  on  them,  (only  three  sitting  down  to 
dinner,)  and  twenty  different  sorts  of  wine,  and  no  end  of 
courses,  at  dinner.  That  the  Earl  wore  a  star,  and  garter, 
and  ribbons— which  Gammon  erroneously  thought  as  apocry- 
phal as  the  rest ;  and  had  told  him  that  he — Titmouse — might 
one  day  wear  them,  and  sit  in  the  House  of  Lords ;  and  had, 
moreover,  advised  him  most  strenuously  to  get  into  Parlia- 
ment as  soon  as'  possible,  as  the  "  cause  of  the  people  wanted 
strengthening."  [As  Lord  Coke  somewhere  says,  in  speaking 
of  a  spurious  portion  of  the  text  of  Lyttleton,  "  that  arrow 
came  never  out  of  Lyttletorfs  quiver" — so  Gammon  instantly 
perceived  that  the  last  sentence  came  never  out  of  Titmouse's 
own  head,  but  was  that  of  a  wise  and  able  man  and  states- 
man.] 

As  soon  as  Titmouse  had  finished  his  little  romance,  Gam- 
mon proceeded  to  the  chief  object  of  his  visit — their  next 
day's  journey.  He  said  that  he  much  regretted  to  say  that 
Mr.  Snap  had  expressed  a  very  anxious  wish  to  witness  the 
triumph  of  Mr.  Titmouse ;  and  that  Mr.  Titmouse,  unless 
he  had  some  particular  objection — "  Oh  none,  'pon  honor ! — 
poor  Snap  !— devilish  good  chap  in  a  small  way !  "  said  Tit- 
mouse ;  and  at  once  gave  his  consent — Gammon  informing 
him  that  Mr.  Snap  would  be  obliged  to  return  to  town  by 
the  next  day's  coach.  The  reader  will  smile  when  I  tell  him, 
and  if  a  lady,  will  frown  when  she  hears,  that  Miss  Quirk 
was  to  be  of  the  party— a  point  which  her  anxious  father  had 
secured  some  time  ago.  Mrs.  Alias  had  declared  that  she  saw 
no  objection  as  Mr.  Quirk  would  be  constantly  with  his  daugh- 
ter, and  Gammon  had  appeared  most  ready  to  bring  about  so 
desirable  a  result.  He  had  also  striven  hard,  unknown  to 
his  partners,  to  increase  their  numbers,  by  the  Tag-rags,  who 
might  have  gone  down,  all  three  of  them,  if  they  had  chosen, 
by  coach,  and  so  have  returned.  Gammon  conceived  that  this 
step  might  not  have  been  unattended  with  advantage  in 
several  ways ;  and  would,  moreover,  have  secured  him  a  con- 
siderable source  of  amusement.  Titmouse,  however,  would 
not  listen  to  the  thing  for  one  moment,  and  Gammon  was 


TEN  THOUSAND  A-YEAS  441 

forced  to  give  up  his  little  scheme.  Two  dashing  young 
fellows,  fashionable  friends  of  Titmouse,  (who  had  picked 
them  up  Heaven  only  knows  where,  but  they  never  deserted 
him,)  infinitely  to  Gammon's  annoyance,  were  to  be  of  the 
party.  He  had  seen  them  but  once,  when  he  had  accompanied 
Titmouse  to  the  play,  where  they  soon  joined  him.  One  was 
a  truly  disgusting-looking  fellow— a  MR.  PIMP  YAHOO— a 
man  about  five-and-thirty  years  old,  tall,  with  a  profusion  of 
black  hair  parted  down  the  middle  of  his  head,  and  falling 
down  in  long  clustering  curls  from  each  temple  upon  his  coat 
collar.  His  whiskers  also  were  ample,  and  covered  two-thirds 
of  his  face,  and  spread  in  disgusting  amplitude  round  his 
throat.  He  had  also  a  jet-black  tuft— an  imperial— depend- 
ing from  his  under  lip.  He  had  an  execrable  eye-full  of  in- 
solence and  sensuality ;  in  short,  his  whole  countenance  be- 
spoke the  through  debauchee  and  ruffian.  He  had  been,  he 
said,  in  the  army  ;  and  was  nearly  connected,  according  to 
his  own  account— as  with  fellows  of  this  description  is  gener- 
ally the  case— with  "  some  of  the  first  families  in  the  North." 
He  was  now  a  man  of  pleasure  about  town— which  contained, 
not  a  better  billiard-player,  as  the  admiring  Titmouse  had 
had  several  opportunities  of  judging.  He  was  a  great- 

Sitron of  the  ring— knew  all  their  secrets— all  their  haunts, 
e  ahyays  had  plenty  of  the  money  of  other  people,  and  drove 
about  in  a  most  elegant  cab,  in  which  Titmouse  had  often 
had  a  seat ;  and  as  soon  as  Mr.  Yahoo  had  extracted  from 
his  communicative  little  companion  all  about  himself,  he 
made  it  his  business  to  conciliate  his  good  graces  by  all  the 
arts  of  which  he  was  master—  and  he  succeeded.  The  other 
chosen  companion  of  Titmouse  was  MR.  ALGERNON  FITZ- 
SNOOKS,  a  complete  fool.  He  was  the  sole  child  of  a  rich 
tradesman— who  christened  him  by  the  sounding  name 
given  above :  and  afterwards  added  the  patrician  prefix  to  the 
surname,  which  also  you  see  above,  in  order  to  gratify  his 
wife  and  son.  The  youth  never  "  took  to  business  "—but 
was  allowed  to  saunter  about,  doing  and  knowing  noth- 
ing, till  about  his  twenty-second  year,  when  his  mother 
died,  followed  a  year  afterwards  by  his  father,  who  be- 
queathed to  his  hopeful  some  fifty  thousand  pounds— abso- 
lutely and  uncontrolleclly.  He  very  judiciously  thought  that 
vouth  was  the  time  to  enjoy  life ;  and  before  he  had  reached 
his  thirtieth  year,  he  had  got  through  all  his  fortune  except 
about  five  or  six  thousand  pounds —in  return  for  which,  he 
had  certainly  got  something  ;  viz.  an  impaired  constitution 
and  a  little  experience,  which  might,  possibly,  be  useful.  He 
had  a  very  pretty  face— regular  features,  and  interesting  eyes, 
his  light  liair  curled  beautifully;  and  he  spoke  in  a 
sort  of  lisp  and  in  a  low  tone— and,  in  point  of  dress,  always 
turned  out  beautifully.  He  also  had  a  cab,  and  was 
a  great  friend  of  Mr.  Yanoo,  who  had  introduced  him  into  a 
great  deal  of  high  society,  principally  in  St.  James's  Street, 


442  TEN  THOUSAND  A-YEAR. 

where  both  he  and  Mr.  Yahoo  had  passed  a  great  deal  of 
their  time,  especially  during  the  nights.  There  was  no  in- 
tentional mischief  iii  poor  Fitz-Snooks :  nature  had  made  him 
only  a  fool — his  prudent  parents  had  done  the  rest ;  and  if  he 
fell  into  vice,  it  was  only  because  he  couldn't  help  it.  Such 
were  the  chosen  companions  of  Titmouse  ;  the  one  a  fool,  the 
other  a  rogue — and  "  he  must^  he  said,  "have  them  down  to 
the  jollifying  at  Yatton."  A  groom  and  a  valet,  both  newly 
hired  the  day  before,  would  complete  the  party  of  the  mor- 
row. Gammon  assured  Titmouse  that  he  had  taken  all  the 
pains  in  the  world  to  get  up  a  triumphant  entry  into  Yatton  ; 
his  agents  at  Grilston,  Messrs.  Bloodsuek  &  Son,  attorneys— 
the  Radical  electioneering  attorneys  of  the  county — who 
were  well  versed  in  the  matter  of  processions,  bands,  flags, 
etc.  etc.  etc.,  had  by  that  time  arranged  everything,  and  they 
were  to  be  met,  when  within  a  mile  of  Yatton,  by  a  proces- 
sion. The  people  at  the  Hall,  also,  were  under  orders  from 
Mr.  Gammon  through  Messrs.  Bloodsuck  and  Son,  to  have 
all  in  readiness— and  a  banquet  prepared  for  nearly  a  hun- 
dred persons— in  fact,  all  comers  were  to  be  welcome.  To  all 
this  Titmouse  listened  with  eyes  glistening,  and  ears  tin- 
gling with  rapture ;  but  can  any  tongue  describe  his  emotion, 
on  being  apprised  that  the  sum  of  £2500,  in  the  banker's 
hands,  was  now  at  his  disposal — that  it  would  be  doubled  in 
a  few  weeks — and  that  a  check  for  JE500,  drawn  by  Mr.  Tit- 
mouse on  the  London  agents  of  the  Grilston  bankers,  had 
been  honored  on  the  preceding  afternoon  ?  Titmouse's  heart 
beat  fast,  and  he  felt  as  if  he  could  have  worshipped  Gam- 
mon. As  for  the  matter  of  carriages,  Mr.  Gammon  said,  that 
probably  Mr.  Titmouse  would  call  that  morning  on  Mr.  Axle, 
in  Long  Acre,  and  select  one  to  his  mind — it  must  be  one 
with  two  seats— and  Mr.  Gammon  had  pointed  out  several 
which  were,  he  thought,  eligible,  and  would  be  shown  to  Mr. 
Titmouse.  That  would  be  the  carriage  in  which  Mr.  Titmouse 
himself  would  travel ;  the  second,  Mr.  Gammon  had  taken 
the  liberty  of  already  selecting.  With  this  Mr.  Gammon 
(just  as  the  new  valet  brought  in  no  less  than  seven  boxes  of 
cigars  ordered  overnight  by  Titmouse)  shook  his  hand  and 
departed,  saying  that  he  should  make  his  appearance  at  the 
Cabbage-stalk  the  next  morning,  precisely  at  eleven  o'clock 
— about  which  time  it  was  arranged  they  were  all  to  start. 
Titmouse  hardly  knew  how  to  contain  himself  on  being  left 
alone.  About  an  hour  or  two  afterwards,  Titmouse  made 
his  appearance  at  Mr.  Axle's.  He  carried  on  two  businesses, 
one  public  i.  e.  a  cpachbuilder — one  private,  i.  e.  a  money- 
lender. He  was  a  rich  man — a  very  obliging  and  "  accommo- 
dating "  person,  by  means  of  which  he  had  amassed  a  fortune 
of,  it  was  believed,  a  hundred  thousand  pounds.  He  never 
made  a  fuss  abo  ;t  selling  on  credit,  lending,  taking  back, 
exchanging  carriages  of  all  descriptions  :  nor  in  discounting 
the  bills  of  his  customers  to  any  amount.  He  was  generally 


TEN  THOUSAND  A-YEAlt.  443 

right  in  each  case  in  the  long  run.  He  would  supply  his 
fashionable  victim  with  as  splendid  a  chariot,  and  funds  to 
keep  it  some  time  going,  as  he  or  she  could  desire ;  well  know- 
ing that  in  due  time,  alter  they  had  taken  a  few  turns  in  it 
about  the  parks,  and  a  few  streets  and  squares  in  the  neigh- 
borhood, it  would  quietly  drive  up  to  one  or  two  huge  dingy 
fabrics  in  a  different  part  of  the  town,  where  it  would  de- 
posit its  burden,  and  then  return  to  its  maker  little  the  worse 
for  wear,  who  took  it  back  at  about  a  twentieth  part  of  its 
cost,  and  soon  again  disposed  of  it  in  a  similar  way.  Mr. 
Axle  showed  Mr.  Titmouse  very  obsequiously  over  his 
premises,  pointing  out  (as  soon  as  he  knew  who  he  was)  the 
carriages  which  Mr.  Gammon  had  the  day  before  desired 
should  be  shown  to  him,  and  which  Mr.  Titmouse,  with  his 
glass  stuck  in  his  eye— where  it  was  kept  by  the  pure  force 
of  muscular  contraction— examined  with  something  like  the 
air  of  a  connoisseur— rapping  with  his  agate-headed  cane 
every  now  and  then — now  against  his  teeth,  then  against  his 
legs.  He  did  not  seem  perfectly  satisfied  with  any  of  them  ; 
they  looked  "devilish  plain  and  dull." 

"  Hollo— Mr.  Axletree,  or  whatever  your  name  is— what 
have  we  here  ?  Ton  my  soul  the  very  thing !  "—he  exclaim- 
ed, as  his  eye  caught  a  splendid  object— the  state  carriage  of 
the  ex-sheriff,  with  its  gorgeously  decorated  panels :  which, 
having  been  vamped  up  for  some  six  or  seven  successive 
shrievalities — (on  each  occasion  heralded  to  the  public  by 
laudatory  paragraphs  in  the  newspapers,  as  entirely  new  and 
signal  instances  of  the  taste  and  magnificence  of  the  sheriff 
elect) — seemed  now  perfunctus  officio.  Mr.  Axle  was  stag- 
gered for  a  moment,  and  scarce  supposed  Mr.  Titmouse  to  be 
in  earnest — Gammon  having  given  him  no  inkling  of  the  real 
character  of  Titmouse ;  but  observing  the  earnest  steadfast 
gaze  with  which  he  regarded  the  glittering  object,  having 
succeeded  in  choking  down  a  sudden  fit  of  laughter,  he  com- 
menced a  most  tempting  eulogmm  upon  the  splendid  struc- 
ture— remarking  on  the  singularity  of  the  circumstance  of 
its  happening  just  at  that  exact  moment  to  be  placed  at  his 
disposal  by  its  former  owner— a  gentleman  of  great  distinct- 
ion, who  had  no  longer  any  occasion  for  it.  Mr.  Axle  had 
had  numerous  applications  for  it  already ;  on  hearing  which, 
Titmouse  got  excited.  The  door  was  opened— he  got-in ;  sat 
on  each  seat—"  Don't  it  hang  beautifully  ?"  inquired  the  con- 
fident proprietor,  swaying  about  the  head  of  the  carriage  as 
he  spoke. 

"  Let  us  see,  who  was  after  it  yesterday  ?  Oh— I  think  it 
was  Sir  Fitzbiscuit  Gander;  but  I've  not  closed  with  him. 

"What's  your  price,  Mr.  Axletree?"  inquired  Titmouse 
rather  heatedly,  as  he  got  out  of  the  carriage. 

After  some  little  higgle-haggling  he  bought  it!  —for 
there  was  nothing  like  closing  at  once  where  there  was  keen 
competition.  Mr.  Gammon  could  not  have  seen  it  when  he 


'444  'TEN  THOUSAND  A-YEAR. 

was  making  his  choice  the  day  before !  For  the  rest  of  the 
day  he  felt  infinitely  elated  at  his  fortunate  purchase,  and 
excited  his  imagination  by  pictures  of  the  astonishment  and 
admiration  which  his  equipage  must  call  forth  on  the  mor- 
row. Punctual  to  his  appointment,  Mr.  Gammon,  a  few 
minutes  before  the  clock  struck  eleven  on  the  ensuing  morn- 
ing ,  drew  up  to  the  Cabbage-stalk,  as  near,  at  least,  as  he 
!  could  get  to  it,  in  a  hackney-coach,  with  his  portmanteau  and 
carpet-bag.  I  say  as  near  as  he  could ;  for  round  about  the 
door  stood  a  little  crowd,  gazing  with  a  sort  of  awe  on  a  mag- 
nificent vehicle  standing  there,  with  four  horses  harnessed 
to  it.  Gammon  looked  at  his  watch,  as  he  entered  the  hotel, 
and  asked  which  of  the  sheriff's  carriages  was  standing  at 
the  door.  The  waiter  to  whom  he  spoke  seemed  nearly  split- 
ting with  laughter,  which  almost  disabled  him  for  answering 
that  it  was  Mr.  Titmouse's  carriage,  ready  for  setting'  off  to 
Yorkshire.  Mr.  Gammon  opened  his  eyes  involuntarily, 
turned  pale,  and  seemed  nearly  dropping  an  umbrella  which 
was  in  hand. 

"  Mr.  Titmouse's !  "  he  echoed  incredulously. 

"  Yes,  sir — been  here  this  hour  at  least  packing ;  such  a 
crowd  all  the  while ;  everybody  think's  it's  the  sheriff,  sir," 
replied  the  waiter,  scarce  able  to  keep  his  countenance.  Mr. 
Gammon  rushed  up-stairs  with  greater  impetuosity  than  he 
had  perhaps  ever  been  known  to  exhibit  oefore,  and  burst 
into  Mr.  Titmouse's  room.  There  was  that  gentleman,  with 
his  hat  on,  his  hands  stuck  into  his  coat  pockets,  a  cigar  in 
his  mouth,  arid  a  tumbler  of  brandy  and  water  before  him. 
Mr.  Yahoo,  and  Mr.  Fitz-Snooks,  and  Mr.  Snap  were  similar- 
ly occupied ;  and  Mr.  Quirk  was  sitting  down  with  his  hands 
in  his  pockets,  and  a  glass  of  negus  before  him,  with  any- 
thing but  a  joyful  expression  of  countenance. 

"  Is  it  possible,  Mr.  Titmouse "  commenced  Gammon, 

almost  breathlessly. 

"  Ah,  how  d'ye  do,  Gammon  ? — punctual !  "  interrupted 
Titmouse,  extending  his  hand. 

"  Forgive  me — but  can  it  be,  that  the  monstrous  thing  now 
before  the  door,  with  a  crowd  grinning  around  it,  is  your 
carriage  f  "  inquired  Gammon,  with  dismay  in  his  face. 

"  I — rather— think— it is,"  replied  Titmouse,  slightly  dis- 
concerted, but  striving  to  look  self-possessed. 

"My  dear  sir,"  replied  Gammon,  in  a  kind  of  agony,  "it  is 
impossible?  It  never  can  be  !  Do  you  mean  to  say  that  you 
bought  it  at  Mr.  Axle's  ?" 

"I  should  rather  think  so,"  replied  Titmouse  with  a 
piqued  air. 

He's  been  grossly  imposing  on  you.  sir !— Permit  me  to 
go  at  once  and  get  you  a  proper  vehicle. 

"  Pon  my  life,  Mr.  Gammon,  1  think  that  its  a  monstrous 
nice  thing— a  great  bargain— and  I've  bought  it  and  paid  for 
it,  that's  more." 


TEN  THOUSAND  A-YEAR.  445 

"  Gentlemen,  I  appeal  to  you?  confidently  said  Gammon, 
turning  in  an  agony  to  Mr.  Yahoo  and  Mr.  Fitz-Snooks. 

"  As  for  me,  sir,"  replied  the  former  coolly,  at  the  same 
time  knocking  off  the  ashes  from  his  cigar ;— u  since  you  ask 
my  opinion,  I  confess  I  rather  like  the  idea— ha  !  ha !  'Twill 
produce  a  sensation;  that's  something  in  this  dull  life !— Eh, 
Snooks  ?  " 

"  Ay— a— I  confess  T  was  a  little  shocked  ut  first,  but  I 
think  I'm  getting  over  it  now,"  lisped  Mr.  Fitz-Snooks,  ad- 
justing his  shirt-collar,  and  then  sipping  a  little  of  his  bran- 
dy and  water.  "  I  look  upon  it,  now,  as  an  excellent  joke  ;— 
egad,  it  beats  Chitterfield  hollow,  though  he,  too,  has  done  a 
trick  or  two  lately." 

"  Did  you  purchase  it  as  a  joke,  Mr.  Titmouse?"  inquired 
Gammon  with  forced  calmness,  ready  to  expire  with  vex- 
ation and  anger. 

"  Why— a— 'pon  my  life— if  you  ask  me— wonder  you  don't 
see  it !  Of  course  I  did !— Those  that  don't  like  it  may  ride, 
you  know,  in  the  other." 

"  We  shall  be  hooted  at,  laughed  at,  wherever  we  go,"  said 
he,  vehemently. 

"  Exactly— that's  the  novelty  1  like,"  said  Mr.  Yal:.;>o,  look- 
ing at  Mr.  Gammon  with  a  smile  of  ineffable  insolence. 

Mr.  Gammon  made  him  no  reply,  but  fixed  an  eye  upon 
him,  under  which  he  became  plainly  uneasy.  He  felt  out- 
done. Talk  of  SCOKN  !— the  eye  of  Gammon,  settled  at  that 
instant  upon  Mr-  Yahoo,  was  its  complete  and  perfect  repre- 
sentative ;  and  from  that  moment  he,  Mr.  Yahoo,  felt  some- 
thing like  fear  of  the  eye  of  man,  or  of  submission  to  it. 
When,  moreover,  he  beheld  the  manner  in  which  Titmouse 
obeyed  Gammon's  somewhat  haughty  summons  out  of  the 
the  room,  he  resolved  to  make  a  friend  of  Gammon.  Tit- 
mouse proved,  however,  inexorable  for  once ;  he  had  bought 
and  paid  for  the  carriage ;  it  suited  his  taste— and  where 
was  the  harm  of  gratifying  it?  Besides,  it  was  already 
packed  -all  was  prepared  for  starting.  Gammon  gave  it  up ; 
and,  swallowing  down  his  rage  as  well  and  as  quickly  as  he 
could,  endeavored  to  reconcile  himself  to  this  infernal  and 
most  unexpected  predicament. 

It  seems  that  Miss  Quirk,  however  really  anxious  to  go 
down  to  Yatton— to  do  anything,  in  short,  calculated  to  com- 
mit Mr.  Titmouse  to  her— was  quite  staggered  on  discover- 
ing, and  shocked  at  seeing,  the  kind  of  persons  who  were  to 
be  their  travelling  companions.  As  for  Mr.  1  ahoo,  she  re- 
coiled from  him  with  horror  as  soon  as  she  had  seen  him. 
What  decent  female,  indeed,  would  not  have  done  so?  She 
had  retired  to  a  bed-chamber  soon  after  entering  the  Cab- 
bage-stalk, and,  seeing  her  two  unexpected  fellow-travellers, 
presently  sent  a  chambermaid  to  request  Mr.  (Junk  to  come 
to  her. 

He.  found  her  considerably  agitated.  She  wished  earnestly 


446  TEN  THOUSAND  A-YEAE. 

to  return  to  Alibi  House ;  and  consented  to  proceed  on  her 
journey  only  on  the  express  promise  of  Mr.  Titmouse,  that 
no  one  should  be  in  the  carriage  in  which  she  went  except 
Mr.  Quirk  and  Mr.  Gammon— unless,  indeed,  Mr.  Titmouse 
thought  proper  to  make  the  fourth. 

Mr.  Quirk,  on  this,  sent  for  Mr.  Gammon,  who,  with  a 
somewhat  bad  grace,  ("  Confound  it ! "  thought  he,  "  every- 
thing seems  going  wrong,")  undertook  to  secure  Mr.  Tit- 
mouse's consent  to  that  arrangement. 

While  he  was  thus  closeted  for  about  five  or  ten  minutes 
with  Mr.  Quirk,  one  of  the  waiters  informed  Mr.  Titmouse 
that  a  lad  had  brought  a  parcel  for  him,  which  he,  the  afore- 
said lad,  was  himself  to  deliver  into  the  hands  of  Mr.  Tit- 
mouse. Accordingly  there  was  presently  shown  into  the 
room  a  little  lad,  in  tarnished  livery,  in  whom  Titmouse  rec- 
ollected the  boy  belonging  to  Mr.  Tag-rag's  one-horse  chaise, 
and  who  gave  a  small  parcel  into  Mr.  Titmouse's  hands, 
"  with  Mrs.  and  Miss  Tag-rag's  respects." 

As  soon  as  he  had  quitted  the  room, "  By  Jove !  What  have 
we  here  ?  "  exclaimed  Titmouse,  just  a  little  flustered,  as  he 
cut  open  the  string.  Inside  was  another  parcel,  wrapped  up 
in  white  paper,  and  tied  in  a  pretty  bow,  with  thin  satin  rib- 
bons. This  again,  and  another  within  it  having  been  opened 
— behold  there  were  three  nice  cambric  pocket-handkerchiefs, 
which,  on  being  examined,  proved  to  be  each  of  them  mark- 
ed with  the  initials  "T.  T."  in  hair;  and  Mr.  Yahoo  happen- 
ing to  unfold  one  of  them,  lo !  in  the  centre  was— also  done 
in  hair — the  figure  of  a  heart  transfixed  with  an  arrow ! ! ! 
Mr.  Yahoo  roared,  and  Mr.  Fitz-Snooks  lisped,  "Is  she 
pretty,  Tit  ?  Where's  her  nest  ?  Any  old  birds  ?— eh  ?  " 

Titmouse  colored  a  little,  then  grinned,  and  put  his  finger 

to  the  side  of  his  nose,  and  winked  his  eye,  as  if  favoring  the 

bright  idea  of  Mr.  Fitz-Snooks.    On  a  sheet  of  gilt-edged 

paper,  and  sealed  with  a  seal  bearing  the  tender  words, 

Forget  me  not"  was  written  the  following : 

"  SIR— Trusting  you  will  excuse  the  liberty,  I  send  you 
three  best  cambric  pocket-handkerchiefs,  which  my  daugh- 
ter have  marked  with  her  own  hair,  and  I  beg  your  accept- 
ance thereof,  hoping  you  may  be  resigned  to  all  that  may 
befall  you,  which  is  the  prayer  of,  dear  sir,  yours  respect 
fully, 

"MARTHA  TAG-RAG. 

"  P.  S. — My  daughter  sends  what  you  may  please  to  wish 
and  accept.  Shall  we  have  the  great  happiness  to  see  you 
here  again  ? 

"  Satin  Lodge,  18th  May,  18—." 

"  Oil !  the  naughty  old  woman !  Fie !  Fie !  "  exclaimed 
Mr,  Yahoo,  with  his  intolerable  smile. 


TEN  THOUSAND  A-YEAR.  447 

"Ton  my  soul,  there's  nothing  in  it,"  said  Titmouse,  red- 
aemng. 

"  Where's  Satin  Lodge  ?"  inquired  Mr.  Fitz-Snooks. 

It  is  a  country-house  on  the— the  Richmond  road,"  said 
Titmouse,  with  a  little  hesitation;  and  just  then  the  return 
of  Gammon,  who  had  resumed  his  usual  calmness  of  manner, 
relieved  him  from  his  embarrassment.  Mr.  Gammon  sue- 
ceeded  in  effecting  the  arrangement  suggested  by  Mr.  Quirk 
and  his  daughter ;  and  within  about  a  quarter  of  an  hour 
afterwards,  behold  the  ex-sheriffs  resplendent  but  cast-off 
carriage  filled  by  Miss  Quirk  and  Titmouse,  and  Mr.  Quirk 
and  Gammon— the  groom  and  valet  sitting  on  the  coach-box; 
while  in  the  other,  a  plain  yellow  carriage,  covered  with 
luggage,  sat  Mr.  Yahoo,  Mr.  Fitz-Snooks,  and  Mr.  Snap,  all 
of  them  with  lighted  cigars— Snap  never  having  been  so 
happy  as  at  that  moment. 

Mr.  Titmouse  had  laid  aside  his  cigar  in  compliment  to 
Miss  Quirk,  who  had  a  long  black  veil  on,  and  an  elegant 
light  shawl,  and  looked  uncommonly  like  a  young  bride  set- 
ting off— oh,  heavens !  that  it  had  been  so !— on  her  wedding 
excursion.  _  Mr.  Gammon  slouched  his  hat  over  his  eyes,  and 
inclined  his  head  downwards,  fit  to  expire  with  vexation 
and  disgust,  as  he  observed  the  grin  and  tittering  of  the 
crowd  around;  but  Titmouse,  who  was  most  splendidly 
dressed,  took  off  his  hat  on  sitting  down,  and  bowed  several 
times  to,  as  he  supposed,  the  admiring  crowd. 

"  Get  on,  boys !  "  growled  Mr.  Gammon ;  and  away  they 
went,  exciting  equal  surprise  and  applause  wherever  they 
went.  No  one  that  met  them  but  must  have  taken  Tit- 
mouse and  Miss  Quirk  for  a  newly-married  couple — probably 
the  son  or  daughter  of  one  of  the  sheriffs,  who  had  lent  the 
state  carriage  to  add  eclat  to  the  interesting  occasion. 

With  the  exception  of  the  sensation  produced  at  every 
place  where  they  changed  horses,  the  only  incident  worth 
noting  that  occurred  during  their  journey,  was  at  the  third 
stage  from  London.  As  they  came  dashing  up  to  the  door  of 
the  inn,  their  advent  setting  all  the  bells  of  the  establish- 
ment ringing,  and  waiters  and  ostlers  scampering  up  to  them 
like  mad,  they  beheld  a  plain  and  laden  dusty  travelling-car- 
riage, waiting  for  horses— and  Gammon  quickly  perceived  it 
to  be  the  carriage  of  the  unfortunate  Aubreys  f  The  travel- 
lers had  alighted.  The  graceful  figure  of  Miss  Aubrey,  her 
face  pale,  and  wearing  an  expression  of  manifest  anxiety  and 
fatigue,  was  standing  near  the  door,  talking  kindly  to  a  beg- 

far-woman,  with  a  cluster  of  halfrnaked  children  around 
er ;  while  little  Aubrey  was  romping  about  with  Miss  Au- 
brey's beautiful  little  spaniel  Cato ;  Agnes,  looking  on  and 
laughing  merrily,  and  trying  to  escape  from  the  hand  of  her 
attendant.  Mr.  and  Mrs.  Aubrey  were  talking  together,  close 
beside  the  carriage-door.  Gammon  observed  all  this,  and 
particularly  that  Mr,  Aubrey  was  scrutinizing  their  appear- 


448  TEN  THOUSAND  A-YEAIt. 

ance,  with  a  sort  of  half-smile  on  his  countenance,  melay; 
choly  as  it  was. 

"  Horses  on  !  "  said  Gammon,  leaning  back  in  the  carriage. 

"  That's  a  monstrous  fine  woman  standing  at  the  inn  door. 
Titmouse— eh  ?"  exclaimed  Mr.  Yahoo,  who  had  alighted 
for  a  moment,  and  stood  beside  the  door  of  Titmouse's  car- 


panels." 

"  I  know  who  it  is,"  said  Titmouse,  rather  faintly ;  "  I'll 
tell  you  by  and  by." 

"  Now,  now  !  my  dear  fellow.  Our  divinity  is  vanishing," 
whispered  Mr.  Yahoo  eagerly,  as  Miss  Aubrey,  having  slip- 
ped something  into  the  beggar's  hand,  stepped  into  the  car- 
riage. She  was  the  last  to  get  in ;  and  as  soon  as  the  door 
was  closed,  they  drove  off. 

"  Who's  that,  Mr.  Titmouse  ?  "  inquired  Miss  Quirk  with 
a  little  eagerness,  observing — women  are  very  quick  in  de- 
tecting such  matters— that  both  Gammon  and  Titmouse 
looked  rather  embarrassed. 

"It's  the— the  Aubreys,"  replied  Titmouse. 

"  Eh  !  By  Jove— is  it  ?  "  quickly  inquired  old  Quirk,  put- 
ting his  head  out  of  the  window ;  "  how  very  odd,  to  meet 
the  old  birds  ?  Egad !  their  nest  must  be  yet  warm — ha !  ha ! " 

"What!  dear  papa,  are  those  the  people  you've  turned 
out !  Gracious !  I  thought  I  heard  some  one  say  that  Miss 
Aubrey  was  pretty !  La !  I'm  sure  I  thought— now  what  do 
you  think,  Mr.  Titmouse  ?  "  she  added,  turning  abruptly  and 
looking  keenly  at  him. 

"  Oh !  'pon  my  life,  I — I — see  nothing  at  all  in  her — devil- 
ish plain,  I  should  say — infernally  pale,  and  all  that !  " 

They  were  soon  on  their  way  again.  Titmouse  quickly 
recovered  his  equanimity,  but  Gammon  continued  silent  and 
thoughtful  for  many— many  miles;  and  the  reader  would 
not  be  surprised  at  it,  if  he  knew  as  well  as  I  do  the  thoughts 
which  the  unexpected  sight  of  that  travelling  carriage  of  Mr. 
Aubrey  had  suggested  to  Mr.  Gammon. 

As  they  approached  the  scene  of  triumph  and  rejoicing, 
and  ascertained  that  they  were  within  about  a  mile  of  the 
peaceful  little  village  of  Yatton,  the  travellers  began 
to  look  out  for  indications  of  the  kind  which  Mr.  Gam- 
mon had  mentioned  to  Titmouse,  viz.  a  band  and  pro- 
cession, and  an  attendant  crowd.  But  however  careful  and 
extensive  might  have  been  the  arrangements  of  those  to 
whom  that  matter  had  been  intrusted,  they  were  likely  to  be 
sadly  interfered  with  by  a  circumstance  which,  happening 
just  then,  might,  to  a  weaker  and  more  superstitious  mind 
than  that  of  Mr.  Titmouse,  have  looked  a  little  ominous — 
namely,  a  tremendous  thunder-storm.  It  was  then  about 
{jive  o'clock  in  th^  af  terrioon.  The  whole  day  had,  been  over. 


TEN  THOUSAND  A-YEAR.  449 

cast,  and  the  sky  threatening ;  and  jnst  as  the  two  carriages 
came  to  that  turning  in  the  road  which  gave  them  the  first 
glimpse  of  the  Hall— only,  however,  the  tops  of  the  great 
chimneys,  which  were  visible  above  the  surrounding  trees— 
a  fearful,  long-continued  flash  of  lightning  burst,  irom  the 
angry  heavens,  followed,  after  an  interval  of  but  a  second  or 
two,  by  a  peal  of  thunder  which  sounded  as  if  a  park  of  artil- 
lery was  being  repeatedly  discharged  immediately  overhead. 

u  Mind  your  horses'  heads,  boys,"  called  out  Mr.  Gammon ; 
"  keep  a  tight  rein." 

Miss  Quirk  was  dreadfully  alarmed,  and  clung  to  her 
father ;  Titmouse  also  seemed  disconcerted,  and  looked  to 
Gammon,  who  was  perfectly  calm,  though  his  face  was  not 
free  from  anxiety.  The  ghastly  glare  of  the  lightning  was 
again  around  them — all  involuntarily  hid  their  faces  in  their 
hands— and  again  rattled  the  thunder  in  a  peal  that  lasted 
more  than  half  a  minute,  and  seemed  in  frightful  contiguity, 
as  it  were  only  a  few  yards  above  their  heads.  Down,  then, 
came  the  long  suspended  rain,  pouring  like  a  deluge,  and  so 
it  continued,  with  frequent  returns  of  the  thunder  and  light- 
ning, for  nearly  a  quarter  of  an  hour.  The  last  turning 
brought  them  within  sight  of  the  village,  and  also  of  some 
fifty  or  sixty  persons  crowding  under  the  hedges,  on  each  side 
—these  were  the  procession  ;  musicians,  bannermen,  footmen, 
horsemen  all  dripping  with  wet,  surely  a  piteous  spectacle  to 
behold.  Out,  however  they  all  turned,  true  to  their  orders, 
as  soon  as  they  saw  the  carriages,  which  immediately  slack- 
ened their  speed— the  rain  also  somewhat  abating.  The  flag- 
man tried  desperately  to  unroll  a  wet  banner,  of  considerable 
size,  with  the  words— 

"  WELCOME  TO  YATTON  1 " 

in  gilded  letters ;  while  the  band  (consisting  of  a  man  with  a 
big  drum,  another  with  a  serpent,  a  third  with  a  trumpet,  a 

*•  j  l  •  i  1  1_    _  .         4    ..  ,  .  •  !l  *   1  ,      ^1  r»-r.T  r\r^/^+0        QTW1      Q      HfiV    "\X7 1  1   I~\       ft. 


puffed  and  blew  lustily ;  bang  !  bang  .bang.!  went  roe  am 
but  the  rain,  the  thunder,  arid  the  lightning  wofully  inter- 
fered with  their  harmony.  'Twoulcl  have  made  your  heart 
ache  to  see  the  wet  flag  clinging  obstinately  to  the  pole ^  ir 
spite  of  all  the  efforts  of  its  burly ;  bearer •!  First  on  hoise- 
back,  was  Barnabas  Bloodsuck .(senior,)  Esq.;  beside  him 
rode  his  son,  Barnabas  Bloodsuck,  (junior,)  Esq. ;  then  came 
the  Reverend  Gideon  Fleshpot,  solemn  simpleton,  the  vicai 
of  Grilston,  the  only  Radical  clergyman  m  that  part  oi  the 
country;  beside  him,  the  Reverend  Smirk  Mud  flint,  a  flip- 
pant, bitter,  little  Unitarian  parson,  a  great  crony  of  Mr. 
Fleshpot,  aud  his  name  singularly  enough  exactly  des ignat- 
Ing  the  qualities  of  his  brain  and  heart.  Next  to  these  alone 
an  his  one-horse  chaise,  (looking  bke  a  pill-box  drawn  by  a 


450  TEN  THOUSAND  A-YBAS. 

leech,)  came  the  little  fat  Whig  apothecary,  Gargle  Glistet 
Esq.  Following  him  came  Going  Gone,  Esq.,  the  auctioneer 
—the  main  prop  of  the  Liberal  side,  being  a  most  eloquent 
speaker — and.  Mr.  Hie  Hsec  Hoc,  a  learned  school-master,  who 
taught  the  Latin  grammar  up  as  far  as  the  irregular  verbs. 
Then  there  were  Mr.  Centipede,  the  occasional  editor,  and 
Mr.  Woodlouse,  the  publisher  and  proprietor  of  the  "  YORK- 
SHIRE STINGO,"  for  which,  also,  Mr.  Mudflint  wrote  a 
great  deal.  These,  and  about  a  dozen  others,  the  flower 
of  the  "  party "  thereabouts,  disdainful  of  the  inclement 
weather,  bent  on  displaying  their  attachment  to  the 
new  Whig  owner  of  Yatton,  and  solacing  each  his  pa- 
tient inner  man  with  anticipation  of  the  jolly  cheer 
that  awaited  them  at  the  Hall,  formed  the  principal  part 
of  the  procession ;  the  rest,  consisting  of  rather  a  miscel- 
lanous  assortment  of  scot-and-lot  and  potwalloper-looking 
people,  all  very  wet  and  hungry,  and  ever  and  anon  casting  a 
look  of  devout  expectation  towards  the  Hall.  Scarcely  a 
villager  of  Yatton  was  to  be  seen  stirring ;  nor  did  any  of  the 
tenants  of  the  estate  join  in  the  procession  ;  even  had  they 
not  felt  far  otherwise  disposed,  they  had  luckily  a  complete 
excuse  for  their  non-appearence  in  the  deplorable  state  of  the 
weather.  Sometimes  the  band  played  ;  then  a  peal  of 
thunder  came;  then  a  cry  of  "hurrah!  Titmouse  forever! 
hurrah  !  "  then  the  band,  and  then  the  thunder,  and  rain  ! 
rain !  rain !  Thus  they  got  to  the  park  gates,  where  they 
paused,  shouting,  "  Titmouse  forever !  hurrah — a— a  !"  Mr. 
Titmouse  bobbing  about,  now  at  one  window,  then  at  the 
other,  with  his  hat  off,  in  the  most  gracious  manner.  Really, 
it  almost  seemed  as  if  the  elements  were  conspiring  to 
signalize,  by  their  disfavor,  Mr.  Titmouse's  assumption  of 
Yatton ;  for  just  as  he  was  passing  under  the  old  gateway, 
out  flashed  the  lightning  more  vividly  than  it  had  yet  ap- 
peared, and  the  thunder  bellowed  and  reverberated  among 
the  woods  as  though  it  would  never  have  ceased.  The  music 
and  shouting  ceased  suddenly ;  carriages,  horsemen,  pedes- 
trians quickened  their  pace  in  silence,  as  if  anxious  to  get  out 
of  the  storm ;  the  horses  now  and  then  plunging  and  rearing 
violently.  Titmouse  was  terribly  frightened,  in  spite  of  his 
desperate  efforts  to  appear  unconcerned.  He  was  as  pale  as 
death,  and  looked  anxiously  at  Gammon,  as  if  hoping  to  de- 
rive courage  from  the  sight  of  his  countenance.  Miss  Quirk 
trembled  violently,  and  several  times  uttered  a  faint 
scream  ;  but  her  father,  old  Mr.  Quirk,  did  not  seem  to  care 
a  pinch  of  snuff  about  the  whole  matter  :  he  rubbed  his  hands 
together  cheerily,  chucked  his  daughter  under  the  chin,  rallied 
Titmouse,  and  nudged  and  jeered  Gammon,  who  seemed 
disposed  to  be  serious  and  silent.  Having  drawn  up  opposite 
the  Hall  door,  it  was  opened  by  Mr.  Griffiths,  with  rather  a 
saddened,  but  a  most  respectful  look  and  manner ;  and  in  the 
same  way  might  be  characterized  some  six  or  seven  servants 


THOUSAND  A-TEAE.  451 

standing  behind  him,  in  readiness  to  receive  the  new-comers. 
The  half-drowned  musicians  tried  to  strike  up  "  Rule  Bri- 
tannia," as  the  hero  of  the  day,  Mr.  Titmouse,  descended  from 
his  carriage,  Mr.  Griffiths  holding  an  umbrella  for  him,  and 
bounded  out  of  the  rain  with  a  hop,  step,  and  a  jump  into  the 
Hall,  where  the  first  words  he  was  heard  to  utter,  were — 

"  What  a  devilish  rum  old  place  !  " 

"God  bless  you!  God  bless  you!  God  bless  you,  Tit- 
mouse !  "  exclaimed  old  Mr.  Quirk,  grasping  him  by  the  hand 
as  soon  as  he  had  entered.  Titmouse  shook  hands  with  Miss 
Quirk,  who  immediately  followed  a  female  servant  to  an 
apartment,  being  exceedingly  nervous  and  agitated.  Gam- 
mon seemed  a  little  out  of  spirits;  and  said  simply,  "You 
know,  Titmouse,  how  fervently  I  congratulate  you. 

'•  Oh !  my  dear  boy,  Tit,  do,  for  Heaven's  sake,  if  you  want 
the  thunder  and  lightning  to  cease,  order  those  wretched 
devils  oft' — send  them  anywhere,  but  do  stop  their  cursed 
noise,  my  dear  boy ! "  excaimed  Mr.  Yahoo,  as  soon  as  he  had 
entered,  putting  his  fingers  to  his  ears. 

"  Mr.  what's-your-name,"  said  Titmouse,  addressing  Mr. 
Griffiths,  "  I'll  trouble  you  to  order  off  those  fellows  and 
their  infernal  noise.  Demme  !  there's  a  precious  row  making 
up  above,  and  surely  one  at  a  time  !  " 

"Ah,  ha,  capital  joke,  by  Jove!  capital!"  said  Mr.  Fitz- 
Snooks. 

"  A— Titmouse— by  Jupiter ! "  said  Mr.  Yahoo,  as,  twirling 
his  fingers  about  in  his  long  black  hair,  of  which  he  seemed 
very  proud,  he  glanced  about  the  Hall,  "  this  a'n't  so  much 
amiss !  Do  you  know,  my  dear  boy,  I  rather  like  it ;  it's  sub- 
stantial, antique,  and  so  forth." 

"  Who  are  those  dem  ugly  old  fellows  up  there  ?  "  presently 
exclaimed  Titmouse,  as,  with  his  glass  stuck  into  his  right 
eye,  and  his  hands  into  his  coat  pockets,  he  stood  staring  at 
the  old-fashioned  pictures  standing  round  the  Hall. 

"  Some  of  them  are  ancestors  of  the  Dreddlingtons,  others 
of  the  Aubrey  families.  They  are  very  old,  sir,"  continued 
Mr.  Griffiths,  "  and  are  much  admired,  and  Mr.  Aubrey  de- 
sired me  to  say,  that  if  you  should  be  disposed  to  part— 

"  Oh  confound  him,  he  may  have  'em  all,  if  that's  what  he 
wants  ;  Jshall  soon  send  them  packing  off!"  Mr.  Griffiths 
bowed,  and  heaved  a  very  deep  sigh.  By  this  time  the  Hall 
was  crowded  with  the  gentlemen  who  had  formed  part  of  the 
procession,  and  who  came  bowing  and  scraping  to  Titmouse, 
congratulating  him,  and  wishing  him  health  and  happiness. 
As  soon  as  he  could  disengage  himself  from  their  flattering 
but  somewhat  troublesome  civilities,  his  valet  came  and 
whispered,  "  Will  you  dress,  sir  ?  All  is  ready,"  and  Titmouse 
followed  him  to  the  dressing-room  which  had  formerly  been 
young  Mrs.  Aubrey's.  'Twas  the  first  time  that  Titmouse 
ever  experienced  the  attentions  of  a  valet,  and  he  was  quite 
nonplussed  at  the  multitudinousness  and  elegance  of  the  ar 


452  TEN  THOUSAND  A-YEAR. 

rangements  around  him.  Such  quantities  of  clothes  of  all 
sorts— dressing-implements,  combs,  brushes,  razors,  a  splen- 
did dressing-case,  scents  in  profusion,  oils,  bear's-grease,  four 
or  five  different  sorts  of  soaps,  etc.,  etc.,  etc. ;  all  this  gave  Tit- 
mouse a  far  livelier  idea  of  nis  altered  circumstances,  of  hav- 
ing really  become  a  gentleman,  than  anything  that  he  had  up 
to  that  moment  experienced.  He  thought  his  valet  one  of  the 
cleverest  and  most  obliging  men  in  the  world,  only  he  oppress- 
ed him  with  his  attentions,  and  at  length  Mr.  Titmouse  said 
he  preferred,  this  time,  dressing  alone,  and  so  dismissed  his 
obsequious  attendant.  In  about  an  hour's  time,  having  been 
obliged  to  summon  Tweedle  to  his  assistance  after  all,  he  had 
completed  his  toilet,  and  was  ushered  into  the  drawing-room, 
which,  as  well  as  the  dining-room,  was  ready  prepared  for 
the  banquet,  forty  or  fifty  covers  being  laid  in  the  two  rooms, 
and  good  substantial  fare  for  at  least  as  many  more,  in  the 
servants'  hall,  where  operations  had  already  commenced. 
On  entering  the  drawing-room,  his  appearance  seemed  to 
produce  a  great  sensation,  and  after  a  little  pause,  the  only 
county  gentleman  who  was  present  advanced  and  intro- 
duced himself,  his  wife,and  daughter.  This  was  Sir  Hark- 
away  Rotgut  Wildfire,  Baronet,  a  tall  and  somewhat  corpu- 
lent man  of  about  fifty,  very  choleric  and  overbearing,  his 
countenance  showing  the  hard  life  he  had  led,  his  nose  being 
red,  and  his  forehead  and  mouth  beset  with  pimples.  He  had 
been  a  bitter  political  opponent  of  Mr.  Aubrey,  and  had  once 
been  a  member  for  the  county,  but  had  so  crippled  his  re- 
sources by  hunting  and  horse-racing,  as  to  compel  the  sacrifice 
of  their  town  amusements;  viz.  his  seat  in  the  House  of 
Commons,  and  Lady  Wildfire's  box  at  the  opera.  This  had 
soured  both  of  them  not  a  little,  and  they  had  sunk,  as  it 
were,  out  of  the  county  circle,  in  which  they  had  once  been 
sufficiently  conspicuous.  Sir  Harkaway  had  an  eye  to  the 
borough  of  Yatton'  on  the  happening  of  the  next  election,  as 
soon  as  he  had  obtained  an  inkling  that  the  new  proprietor 
of  Yatton  was  a  very  weak  young  man ;  and  hence  his  patro- 
nizing presence  at  Yatton,  in  consequence  of  the  invitation 
,  respectfully  conve ved  to  him  in  Mr.  Titmouse's  name,  through 
Messrs.  Bioodsuck  and  Son.  Besides  Lady  Wildfire  and 
her  daughter,  both  of  whom  had  inquired  with  a  sort  of 
haughty  curiosity  about  the  lady  who  had  accompanied  Mr. 
Titmouse  from  t9wn— a  point  which  had  been  at  length 
cleared  up  to  their  satisfaction — there  were  about  a  dozen 
ladies,  the  wives  of  the  gentlemen  who  had  borne  so  distin- 
guished a  part  in  the  triumphal  procession.  They  looked 
rather  a^queer  set,  and  none  of  them  dared  to  speak  either 
to  Lady"  Wildfire  or  her  daughter  till  spoken  to  by  them. 
Never  had  old  Yatton  beheld  within  its  walls  so  motley 
a  group ;  and  had  the  Aubreys  continued  there,  hospitable 
as  they  were,  accessible  and  charitable  as  they  were,  I 
leave  the  reader  to  guess  whether  such  creatures  ever 


TEN  THOUSAND  A-YEAB.  453 

have  found  their  way  thither.  By  such  guests,  however,  were 
the  two  principal  tables  crowded  on  this  joyous  occasion,  and 
about  half-past  six  o'clock  the  feast  commenced,  and  a  feast  it 
certainly  was,  both  elegant  and  substantial,  nothing  having 
been  spared  that  money  could  procure.  Mr.  Aubrey  had  a  fine 
cellar  of  wines  at  Yatton,  which,  owing  to  some  strange  mis- 
understanding,had  been  sold  by  private  contract,  not  amongst 
his  own  friends  in  the  neighborhood,  as  Mr.  Aubrey  had  in- 
tended, and  imagined  that  he  had  directed,  but  to  Mr.  Tit- 
mouse. Choice,  indeed,  were  these  wines,  and  supplied  on  the 
present  occasion  in  wanton  profusion.  Champagne,  burgundy, 
and  claret,  flowed  like  water,  and  the  other  wines  in  like  man- 
ner; but  which  last  were  not,  like  the  former  class  of 
wines,  confined  to  the  two  principal  rooms,  but  found 
their  way  into  the  servants'  hall,  and  were  there  drunk 
without  stint.  Merriment  echoed  uproariously  from  all 
parts  of  the  old  Hall,  and  Mr.  Titmouse  was  universally 
declared  to  be  a  very  fine  fellow,  and  likely  to  become 
by  far  the  most  popular  man  in  the  county.  The  Rev- 
erend Mr.  Fleshpot  said  grace,  and  the  Reverend  Mr.  Mud- 
flint  returned  thanks  ;  and  shortly  afterwards  Sir  Harkaway 
arose,  and,  his  eye  fixed  firmly  on  the  adjoining  borough,  and 
also  on  the  jolly  table  which  promised  to  be  ever  opened  to 
him  at  Yatton,  he  proposed  the  health  of  the  distinguished 
proprietor  of  Yatton,  in  certainly  a  somewhat  fulsome  strain. 
The  toast  was  received  with  the  utmost  enthusiasm ;  the  gen- 
tlemen shouted  and  jingled  their  glasses  on  the  table,  while 
the  ladies  waved  their  handkerchiefs ;  indeed  the  scene  was 
one  of  such  overpowering  excitement,  that  Miss  Quirk  burst 
into  tears,  overcome  by  her  emotions  ;  her  papa  winking  very 
hard  to  those  about  him,  and  using  every  exertion  in  his  power 
to  point  the  attention  of  those  present  to  the  probability  that  a 
very  near  and  tender  relationship  was  going  to  exist  between 
that  young  lady  and  Mr.  Titmouse.  Mr.  Gammon,  who  sat 
next  to  Titmouse,  assured  him  that  it  was  absolutely  neces- 
sary for  him  to  make  a  speech  to  the  company  in  acknowledg- 
ment of  the  compliment  which  had  just  been  paid  him. 

"  I  shall  put  my  foot  in  it— by  jingo  I  shall !  You  must  help 
me ! "  he  whispered  to  Mr.  Gammon,  in  an  agony  of  trepida- 
tion and  a  mist  of  confusion,  as  he  rose  from  his  chair,  being 
welcomed  in  the  most  enthusiastic  manner,  by  applause  of 
every  kind,  lasting  for  several  minutes.  At  length,  when  the 
noise  had  subsided  into  a  fearful  silence,  he  stammered  out, 
prompted  incessantly  by  Mr.  Gammon,  something  exceeding- 
ly like  the  following,  if,  indeed,  he  did  not  use  these  very 
words. 

"  Mr.— I  beg  pardon—  Sir  Hark— away,  and  gentlemen— gen- 
tlemen and  ladies,  am  most  uncommon,  monstrous— partic- 
ular happy  to— to — (eh  ?  what  d'ye  say,  Mr.  ^Gammon  ?)  see 
you  all  here  — at  this  place—  here  — at  Yatton."  —  (Ap* 
Clause.)  "  Ladies  and  gentlemen  — I  say— hem  !•-  unac- 


454  TEN  THOUSAND  A-YEAE. 

customed  as" — (much  applause,  during  which  Titmouse  stoop- 
ed and  whispered  to  Gammon—"  Curse  me  if  I  can  catch  a 
word  you  say !  ")  "  Happy  and  proud  to  see  you  all  here — at 
Yatton— homes  of  my  ancestry — known  to  you  all— centuries. 
Enjoyed  yourselves,  I  hope — (great  applause) — arid  hope  you'll 
often  come  and  do  the  same — (still  greater  applause.)  Par- 
ticular glad  to  see  the  ladies  (applause.)— often  heard  of  the 
beauties  of  Yatton— never  believed  it— no— beg  pardon,  mean 
I  now  see  them — (applause)  Am  fond  of  horses— (applause) 
— racing,  hunting,  and  all  that."  (Here  Sir  Harkaway,  ex- 
tending  his  hand,  publicly  shook  that  of  the  eloquent  speaker.) 
"  Sorry  to  turn  out  the — the — old  bird — but — nest  not  Ms- 
mine  all  the  while— (em otion)—  bear  him  no  ill-will  —  (ap- 
plause.) Political  principles — (profound  silence)  good  old  Whig 
principles — (loud  applause) — rights  of  the  people — religious 
liberty  and  all  that— (vociferous  applause)— found  at  my  post 
in  the  hour  of  danger — enemy  stole  a  march  on  me— (great 
laughter  and  applause)  Won't  detain  you — ladies  and  gentle- 
men— drink  your  good  healths,  and  many  happy  returns  of 
the  day."  I)own  sat  Mr.  Titmouse,  exhausted  with  his  maid- 
en speech ;  and  quite  overpowered,  moreover,  by  the  extra- 
ordinary applause  with  which  he  was  greeted  at  its  conclusion. 
In  due  course,  many  other  toasts  were  drunk.  Lady  Wild- 
fire and  the  married  ladies"  "  Miss  Wildfire  and  the  single 
ladies"  "  Sir  Harkaway  JKotgut  Wildfire"  "  Religious  Lib- 
erty" (to  which  Mr.  Mudflint  responded  in  a  very  eloquent 
speech.)"  The  Liberty  of  the  Press  ;"  "Messrs.  Quirk  Gam- 
mon, and  Snap,  the  enterprising,  skillful,  and  learned  profes- 
sional advisers  of  Mr.  Titmouse."  Dancing  was  now  loudly 
called  for ;  and  the  hall  was  speedily  prepared  for  it.  By  this 
time,  however,  it  was  past  eleven  o'clock :  the  free  potations 
of  all  the  men,  and  indeed  of  more  than  one  of  the  ladies, 
were  beginning  to  tell,  and  the  noise  and  confusion  were  very 
great.  Fierce  confused  sounds  issued  from  the  servants'  hall, 
where  it  proved  that  a  great  fight  was  going  on  between 
Pumpkin  the  gardener,  and  a  man  who  insisted  on  shouting 
"  Titmouse  for  ever— down  with  the  Tory  Aubrey ! "  Pump- 
kin had  much  the  best  of  it,  and  beat  his  opponent,  after  a 
severe  encounter,  into  silence  and  submission.  Then  there 
were  songs  sung  in  all  the  rooms  at  once — speeches  made, 
half-a-dozen  at  the  same  time;  in  short,  never  before  had 
such  scenes  been  witnessed,  or  such  uproar  heard,  within  the 
decorous,  the  dignified,  and  venerable  precincts  of  Yatton. 
Scenes  ensued  which  really  baffle  description.  Mr.  Titmouse, 
of  course,  drank  a  great  quantity  of  wine,  although  Mr.  Gam- 
mon never  left  his  side,  and  checked  him  fifty  times  when 
he  was  about  to  fill  his  glass :  and  the  excitement  produced 
by  wine,  will,  I  trust,  in  some  measure,  mitigate  the  reader's 
indignation  at  hearing  of  a  little  incident  Avhich  occurred,  in 
which  Titmouse  was  concerned,  and  which,  about  half  past 
three  or  four  o'clock  in  the  morning,  served  to  bring  that 


TEN  THOUSAND  A-YEAR.  455 

brilliant  entertainment  to  a  somewhat  abrupt  and  rather  un- 
pleasant termination.  Scarcely  knowing  where  he  was,  or 
what  he  was  about,  I  am  sorry  to  say,  that  while  standing,  as 
well  as  he  could,  beside  Miss  Wildfire,  to  dance  for  the  fifth 
tune  with  her— a  plump,  fair-faced,  good-natured  girl  of  about 
nineteen  or  twenty— he  suddenly  threw  his  arms  round  her, 
and  imprinted  half-a-dozen  kisses  on  her  forehead,  lips,  cheek 
and  neck,  before  she  could  recover  from  the  confusion  into 
which  this  extraordinary  assault  had  thrown  her.  Her  faint 
shriek  reached  her  father's  ears,  while  he  was  in  a  distant 
part  of  the  room,  persecuting  Miss  C^uirk  with  his  drunken 
ana  profligate  impertinences.  Hastily  approaching  the  quar- 
ter whence  his  daughter's  voice  had  issued,  he  beheld  her 
just  extricated  from  the  insolent  embrace  of  the  half-uncon- 
scious Titmouse,  and  greatly  agitated.  With  flaming  eye 
and  outstretched  arm,  he  approached  his  unfortunate  little 
host  and  seizing  hold  of  his  right  ear  almost  wrung  it  out  of  his 
head,Titmouse  quite  shrieking  with  the  pain  it  occasioned. 
Still  retaining  his  hold,  uttering  the  while  most  fearful  impre- 
cations—he  gave  him  three  violent  kicks  upon  the  seat  of  hon- 
or, the  last  of  which  sent  him  spinning  into  the  arms  of  old 
Mr.  Quirk,  who  was  hurrying  up  to  his  relief,  and  who  fell 
flat  on  the  floor  with  the  violent  concussion.  Then  Miss 
Quirk  rushed  forward  and  screamed ;  a  scene  of  dreadful 
confusion  ensued ;  and  at  length  the  infuriated  and  half- 
drunken  baronet,  forced  away  by  his  wife  and  his  daughter, 
quitted  the  Hall,  and  got  into  his  carriage,  uttering  fearful 
threats  and  curses  all  the  way  home  ;  without  once  advert- 
ing to  the  circumstance,  of  which  also  Lady  Wildfire  and  her 
daughter  were  not  aware,  that  he  had  been  himself  engaged 
in  perpetrating  the  very  same  kind  of  misconduct  which  he 
had  so  severely  and  justly  punished  in  poor  Titmouse.  As 
for  Mr.  Yahoo  and  Mr.  Fitz-Snooks,  they  had  been  in  quest 
of  the  same  species  of  amusement  the  whole  night :  and  had 
ech  of  them,  in  pursuing  their  adventures  in  the  servants'  hall 
very  narrowly  escaped  much  more  serious  indignities  and  in- 
juries than  had  fallen  to  the  lot  of  the  hospitable  owner  of 
the  mansion. 

"  About  half  past  four  o'clock,  the  sun  was  shining  in  cloud 
less  splendor,  tne  air  cleared,  and  all  nature  seeming  freshen- 
ed after  the  storm  of  the  preceding  day ;  but  what  a  scene 
was  presented  at  Yatton  !  Two  or  three  persons,  one  with 
his  hat  off,  asleep  ;  another  grasping  a  half-empty  bottle ;  and 
a  third  in  a  state  of  desperate  indisposition,  were  to  be  seen, 
at  considerable  distances  from  each  other,  by  the  side  of  the 
carriage-road  leading  down  to  the  park  gates.  Four  or  five 
horses,  ready  saddled  and  bridled,  but  neglected,  and  appar- 
ently forgotten  by  both  servants  and  masters,  were  wander- 
ing about  the  fine  green  old  court  opposite  the  Hall  door, 
eating  the  grass,  and  crushing  with  their  hoofs  the  beautiful 
beds  of  flowers  and  shrubs  which  surrounded  it.  Mr.  Glister's 


456  TEN  THOUSAND  A-YEAE. 

gig  had  got  its  wheels  entangled  with  the  old  sundial,— hav- 
ing been  drawn  thither  by  the  horse,  which  had  been  put  into 
it  at  least  two  hours  before ;  opposite  the  Hall  door  stood  the 
post-chaise  which  had  brought  Mr.  and  Mrs.  Mudflint  and 
their  daughter.  The  latter  two  were  sitting  in  it,  one  asleep 
— the  other,  Mrs.  Mudflint,  anxiously  on  the  lookout  for  her 
husband,  from  time  to  time  calling  to  him,  but  in  vain  ;  for 
about  half-an-hour  before,  he  had  quitted  the  room  where  he. 
Mr.  Fleshpot,  Mr.  Going  Gone,  and  Mr.  Centipede  had  been 
playing  a  rubber  at  whist,  till  they  almost  all  of  them  fell 
asleep  with  their  cards  in  their  hands,  and  made  his  way  to 
the  stables,  where,  not  finding  his  chaise  in  the  yard,  or  his 
horses  in  the  stalls,  he  supposed  his  wife  and  daughter  had 
gone  home,  whither  he  followed  them  by  the  footpath  leading 
through  the  fields  which  stretched  along  the  high  road  to 
Grilston ;  and  along  which  said  fields  he  was,  at  that  moment, 
staggering,  hiccuping,  not  clearly  understanding  where  he 
was,  nor  where  he  had  last  seen  his  wife  and  daughter. 
Candles  and  lamps  were  still  burning  and  glimmering  in 
some  of  the  rooms ;  and  in  the  servants'  hall  there  were  some 
dozen  or  so,  who,  having  awoke  from  a  deep  sleep,  were  call- 
ing for  more  ale,  or  wine,  or  whatever  else  they  could  get. 
Some  of  the  old  family  servants  had  fled  hours  ago  from 
scenes  of  such  unwonted  riot,  to  their  bed-rooms,  and,  having 
locked  and  baricaded  the  doors,  gone  to  sleep.  Mr.  Griffiths 
sat  in  an  old  arm-chair  in  the  library,  the  picture  of  misery ; 
he  had  been  repeatedly  abused  and  insulted  during  the  night, 
and  had  fled  thither,  unable  to  bear  the  sight  of  the  disgust- 
ing revelry  that  was  everywhere  around  going  forward.  In 
short,  at  every  point  that  caught  the  eye,  were  visible  the 
evidences  of  the  villainous  debauchery  that  had  prevailed  for 
the  last  seven  hours ;  and  which,  under  the  Titmouse  dynasty, 
was  likely  to  prevail  at  all  times  thereafter.  As  for  Mr.  Tit- 
mouse, half  stunned  with  the  treatment  he  had  experienced 
at  the  hands  of  Sir  Harkaway,  he  had  been  carried  to  bed- 
to  the  late  bed-room  of  Mr.  and  Mrs.  Aubrey — where,  by  his 
excessive,  and  miscellaneous,  and  long-continued  potations, 
aiding  the  effect  of  the  serious  injuries  which  he  had  sustain- 
ed, he  lay  sprawling  on  the  bed,  half  undressed,  in  a  truly  de- 
plorable condition.  Mr.  Glister,  who  had  been  summoned 
to  his  bed-side  upwards  of  an  hour  before,  sat  now  nodding 
in  his  chair  beside  his  patient ;  and  pretty  nearly  in  a  state  of 
similar  exhaustion  were  his  valet  and  the  housekeeper,  who 
had,  from  time  to  time,  wiped  her  eyes  and  sobbed  aloud 
when  thinking  of  past  times,  and  the  grievous  change  that 
had  come  over  old  Yatton.  Mr.  Yahoo,  Mr.  Fitz-Snooks,  Mr. 
Snap,  Mr.  Quirk,  and  Miss  Quirk,  (the  last  having  retired  to 
her  bed-room  in  alarm,  at  the  time  of  Titmouse's  mischance,) 
were  in  their  respective  chambers,  all  of  them  probably 
asleep.  Poor  Hector,  chained  to  his  kennel,  having  barked 
himself  hoarse  for  several  hours,  lay  fast  asleep,  no  one  hay- 


TEN  THOUSAND  A-YEAB.   .  457 

Ing  attended  to  him,  or  giving  him  anything  to  eat  since  Mr 
1  itmouse  s  arrival.  Gammon  had  fleet  from  the  scene,  in  dis- 
gust and  alarm,  to  his  bed-room,  some  three  hours  before,  but 
unable  to  sleep— not,  however,  with  excess  of  wine,  for  he  had 
drunk  but  a  very  few  glasses— had  arisen  about  four  o'clock, 
and  was  at  that  moment  wandering  slowly,  with  folded  arms 
and  downcast  countenance,  up  and  down  the  fine  avenue  of 
elm-trees,  where,  it  may  be  recollected,  Mr.  Aubrey  had  spent 
a  portion  of  the  last  evening  of  his  stay  at  Yatton. 

Such  is  my  account— and  as  fair  an  account  as  I  know  how 
to  give  of  the  matter ;  but  it  is  curious  to  observe  how  very 
differently  the  same  thing  will  strike  different  people.  As 
soon  as  the  grateful  Mr.  Centipede  had  recovered  from  the 
excitement  occasioned  by  the  part  he  had  taken  in  the  me- 
morable festival  above  described,  he  set  to  work  with  the  pen 
of  a  ready  writer,  and  in  the  next  number  of  the  *'  YORKSHIRE 
STINGO,"  there  appeared  the  following  interesting  account  of 
the 

"  FESTIVITIES  at  YATTON  HALL,  on  the  occasion  of  POSSESSION 
being  taken  by  TITTLEBAT  TITMOUSE,  ESQUIRE. 

"  Yesterday  this  interesting  event  came  off  with  signal 
eclat.  Notwithstanding  the  very  unfavorable  state  of  the 
weather,  about  five  o'clock  in  the  evening  an  imposing  caval- 
cade, comprising  many  of  the  leading  gentry  and  yeomanry 
of  this  part  of  the  county,  on  foot  and  on  horseback,  preced- 
ed by  an  admirable  band,  and  a  large  and  splendid  banner, 
bearing  the  inscription—'  Welcome  to  Yatton?  went  out  to 
meet  the  above  gentlemen,  whose  cortege,  in  two  carriages, 
made  its  appearance  in  the  village  about  naif-past  five.  The 
band  immediately  struck  up '  See  the  Conqering  Hero  comes ! ' 
which,  however,  was  nearly  drowned  in  the  shout  which 
welcomed  the  new  proprietor  of  the  noble  estate  of  Yatton. 
His  carriage  was  of  the  most  tasteful,  splendid  and  unique 
description,  and  attracted  universal  admiration.  Mr.  Tit- 
mouse repeatedly  bowed  through  the  carriage  windows,  in 
graceful  acknowledgment  of  the  cordial  welcome  and  con- 
gratulations with  which  he  was  received.  He  was  dressed  in 
a  light-blue  surtout,  with  velvet  collar,  full  black  stock,  and 
a  rich  velvet  waistcoat  of  plaid  pattern.  His  countenance  is 
handsome  and  expressive,  nis  eye  penetrating,  and  his  brow 
strongly  indicative  of  thought.  He  appears  to  be  little  more 
than  twenty-five  years  old  ;  so  that  he  nas  before  him  a  pros- 
pectof  a  long  and  brilliant  career  of  happiness  and  public  useful- 
ness. Tables  were  spread  in  all  the  chief  apartments,  groaning 
beneath  the  most  costly  viands.  All  the  luxuries  of  the  season 
were  there  ;  and  the  wines  (which  we  believe  were  those  of  Mr. 
Aubrey)  were  of  the  first  description.  Grace  was  said  by  the 
exemplary  vicar  of  Grilston,  the  Rev.  Mr.  Fleshpot ;  and  the 
Kev.  Mr.  Mudflint  returned  thanks.  Sir  Harkaway  Rotgut 


458  TEN  THO  US  AND  A-TEAS. 

Wildfire  (whose  amiable  lady  and  accomplished  daughter 
were  present)  proposed  the  health  of  Mr.  Titmouse  in  a  brief, 
but  manly  and  cordial  address;  and  the  manner  in  which 
Mr.  Titmouse  acknowledged  the  toast,  which  was  drunk  with 
the  greatest  possible  enthusiasm — the  simplicity,  point,  and 
fervor  which  characterized  every  word  he  uttered — were  such 
as  to  excite  lively  emotion  in  all  who  heard  it,  and  warrant 
the  highest  expectations  of  his  success  in  parliament.  Noth- 
ing could  be  more  touching  than  his  brief  allusions  to  the 
sufferings  and  privations  which  he  had  undergone— nothing 
more  delicate  and  forbearing  than  the  feeling  which  pervad- 
ed his  momentary  allusions  to  the  late  occupant  of  Yatton. 
When,  however,  he  distinctly  avowed  his  political  principles 
as  those  of  a  strong  and  decided  Whig— as  those  of  a  daunt- 
less champion  of  civil  and  religious  liberty  among  all  classes 
of  his  Majesty's  subjects — the  applause  was  long  and  enthu- 
siastic. After  dinner  the  great  hall  was  cleared  for  dancing, 
which  was  opened  by  Mr.  Titmouse  and  Miss  Wildfire ;  Lady 
Wildfire  being  led  out  by  the  Hon.  Mr.  Yahoo,  an  intimate 
friend  of  Mr.  Titmouse.  We  should  not  omit  to  mention  that 
Miss  Quirk  (the  only  daughter  of  Caleb  Quirk,  Esq.,  the  head 
of  the  distinguished  firm  of  Quirk,  Gammon,  and  Snap,  of 
London,  to  whose  untiring  and  most  able  exertions  is  owing 
the  happy  change  which  has  taken  place  in  the  ownership  or 
the  Yatton  property)  accompanied  her  father,  at  the  earnest 
request  of  Mr.  Titmouse,  who  danced  several  sets  with  her. 
Sir  Algernon  Fitz-Snooks,  a  distinguished  fashionable,  also 
accompanied  Mr.  Titmouse,  and  entered  with  great  spirit 
into  all  the  gayeties  of  the  evening.  The  '  light  fantastic  toe ' 
was  kept '  tripping '  till  a  late,  or  rather  very  early  hour  in  the 
morning— when  the  Hall  was  once  more  (for  a  time)  surren- 
dered to  the  repose  and  solitude  from  which  it  has  been  so 
suddenly  and  joyously  aroused."  [In  another  part  of  the 
paper  was  contained  an  insulting  paragraph,  charging  Mr. 
Aubrey  with  being  a  party  to  the  "  flagrant  and  iniquitous 
job,"  by  which  Sir  Percivai  Pickering  had  been  returned  for 
the  borough  ;  and  intimating  pretty  distinctly,  that  Mr.  Au- 
brey had  not  gone  without  a  consideration "  for  his  share 
in  the  nefarious  transaction.] 

A  somewhat  different  account  of  the  affair  appeared  in  the 
"  YORK  TRUE  BLUE  "  of  the  same  day. 

"  We  have  received-  one  or  two  accounts  of  the  orgies  of 
which  Yatton  Hall  was  yesterday  the  scene,  on  occasion  of 
Mr.  Titmouse  taking  possession.  We  shall  not  give  publici- 
ty to  the  details  which  have  been  furnished  us— hoping  that 
the  youth  and  inexperience  of  the  new  owner  of  Yatton  (all 
allowance,  also,  being  made  for  the  very  natural  excitement 
of  such  an  occasion)  will  be  allowed  in  some  measure  to  pal- 
liate the  conduct  then  exhibited.  One  fact,  however,  we  may 
mention,  that  a  very  serious  fracas  arose  between  Mr.  Tit- 
mouse and  a  certain  well-known  sporting  Baronet,  which  is 


TEN  THOUSAND  A-YEAR.  459 

expected  to  give  employment  t9  the  gentlemen  of  the  long 
robe.  Nor  can  we  resist  adverting  to  a  circumstance,  which 
our  readers  will,  we  trust,  credit,  on  being_  assured  that  we 
witnessed  it  with  our  own  eyes— that  Mr.  Titmouse  positive- 
ly travelled  in  the  cast-off  state  carriage  of  the  Lord  Mayor 
of  London ! !  Nothing,  by  the  way,  could  be  more  absurd 
and  contemptible  than  the  attempt  at  a  '  Procession '  which 
was  got  up— of  which  our  accounts  are  ludicrous  in  the  ex- 
treme. Will  our  readers  believe  it,  that  the  chief  personages 
figuring  on  the  occasion,  were  the  editor  and  publisher  of  a 
certain  low  Radical  paper— which  will  no  doubt,  this  day, 
favor  its  readers  with  a  flaming  description  of  this  '  memo- 
rable affair.' " 

Titmouse,  assisted  by  his  attentive  valet,  made  a  desperate 
attempt  to  get  up,  and  present  himself  the  next  day  at  din- 
ner. Aided  by  a  glass  of  pretty  strong  brandy  and  \yater,  he 
at  length  got  through  the  fatiguing  duties  ot  the  toilet,  and 
entered  the  drawing-room,  where  his  travelling  companions 
were  awaiting  his  arrival— dinner  being  momentarily  expect- 
ed to  be  announced.  He  was  deadly  pale ;  his  knees  trem- 
bled; his  eyes  could  not  bear  the  light;  and  everything 
seemed  in  undulating  motion  around  him,  as  he  sank  in  si- 
lent exhaustion  on  the  sofa.  After  a  few  minutes'  continu- 
ance, he  was  compelled  to  leave  the  room,  leaning  on  Gam- 
mon's arm,  who  conducted  him  to  his  bed-room,  and  left  him 
in  charge  of  his  valet,  who  got  him  again  into  bed,  where  he 
lay  enduring  much  agony,  (Dr.  Goddart  being  sent  for,)  while 
his  friends  were  enjoying  themselves  at  dinner. 

Snap  had  set  off  the  ensuing  day  for  town,  by  the  first 
coach,  pursuant  to  the  arrangement  already  spoken  of ;  but 
I  think  that  old  Mr.  Quirk  would  have  made  up  his  mind  to 
continue  at  Yatton  until  something  definite  had  been  done 
by  Titmouse,  in  two  matters  which  absorbed  all  the 
thoughts  of  the  old  gentleman— his  daughter  and  the  Ten 
Thousand  Pounds  bond.  Miss  Quirk,  however,  intense  as 
was  her  anxiety  to  become  the  affianced  bride  of  Titmouse, 
and  as  much  the  mistress  of  the  delightful  domain  where  at 
present  she  dwelt  only  as  a  guest,  and  in  a  very  embarrassing 
position— was  not  so  blind  to  all  perception  of  womanly  deli- 
cacy as  to  prolong  her  stay  at  Yatton ;  and  at  length  pre- 
vailed upon  her  father  to  take  their  departure  on  the  day  but 
one  after  that  on  which  they  had  arrived.  Mr.  Quirk  was 
perfectly  wretched ;  he  vehemently  distrusted  Titmouse— lie 
feared  and  detested  Gammon.  As  for  the  former  gentleman, 
he  had  not  made  any  definite  advances  whatever  towards 
Miss  Quirk.  He  had  not  afforded  to  any  one  the  slightest 
evidence  of  a  promise  of  marriage,  either  express  or  imphed- 
He  chattered  to  Miss  Quirk  an  infinite  deal  of  civil  nonsense 
—but  that  was  all,  in  spite  of  the  innumerable  opportunities 
afforded  him  by  the  lady.  Was  Titmouse  acting  under  the 


460  TEN  THOUSAND  A-YEAE. 

secret  advice  of  that  decitful  devil  Gammon  ?— thought  Mr. 
Quirk,  in  an  ecstasy  of  perplexity  and  apprehension.  Then 
as  to  the  other  matter — but  there  Gammon  had  almost  as 
deep  a  stake  in  proportion,  as  Quirk  himself.  On  the  morn- 
ing of  his  departure,  he  and  Gammon  had  a  very  long  inter- 
view, in  which  they  several  times  came  to  high  words  ;  but  in 
the  end  Gammon  vanquished  his  opponent  as  usual ;  allayed 
all  his  apprehensions  \  accounted  for  Titmouse's  conduct  in 
the  most  natural  way  in  the  world — look  at  his  position  just 
now,  the  excitement,  the  novelty,  the  bewilderment,  the  in- 
disposition he  was  experiencing  :  surely,  surely  that  was  not 
a  moment  to  bring  him  to  book  !  In  short,  Gammon  at  length 
brought  Quirk,  who  had  received  the  first  intimation  of  the 
matter  with  a  sudden  grunt  of  surprise  and  anger,  to  ac- 
knowledge the  propriety  of  Gammon's  remaining  behind,  to 
protect  Titmouse  from  the  designing  Yahoo  that  had  got 
hold  of  him ;  and  solemnly  pledged  himself,  as  in  the  sight 
of  Heaven,  to  use  his  utmost  efforts  to  bring  about,  as  speed- 
ily as  possible,  the  two  grand  objects  of  Mr.  Quirk's  wishes. 
With  this  the  old  gentleman  was  fain  to  be  satisfied ;  but  en- 
tered the  chaise  which  was  to  convey  Miss  Quirk  and  him- 
self to  Grilston,  with  as  rueful  a  countenance  as  he  had  ever 
exhibited  in  his  life.  Mr.  Titmouse  was  sufficiently  recovered 
to  be  present  at  the  departure  of  Miss  Quirk,  who  regarded 
his  interesting  and  languid  looks  with  an  eye  of  melting 
sympathy  and  affection.  With  half  a  smile  and  half  a  tear, 
she  slipped  into  his  hand,  as  he  led  her  to  the  chaise,  a  little 
sprig  of  heart's  ease,  which  he  at  once  stuck  into  the  button- 
hole of  his  coat. 

"  'Pon  my  soul— must  you  go  ?  Devilish  sorry  you  can't 
stay  to  have  seen  some  fun ! — The  old  gent  (meaning  her 
father)  don't  quite  seem  to  like  it— he,  he  !  "  said  he  in  a  low 
tone :  then  he  handed  her  into  the  chaise,  she  dropping  her 
veil  to  conceal  the  starting  tear  of  mingled  disappointment, 
and  desire,  and  disgust,  and  they  drove  off,  Titmouse  kissing 
his  hand  to  her  as  he  stood  upon  the  steps  ;  and,  as  soon  as 
they  were  out  of  sight,  he  exchanged  a  very  significant  smile 
with  Mr.  Gammon. 

The  next  day  Titmouse  rose  about  ten  o'clock,  almost  en- 
tirely recovered  from  his  indisposition.  Accompanied  by 
Mr.  Yahoo  and  Mr.  Fitz-Snooks,  with  whom  he  was  convers- 
ing as  to  the  course  he  should  take  with  reference  to  Sir 
Harkaway — whom,  however,  they  advised  him  to  treat  with 
silent  contempt,  as  he,  Titmouse,  was  clearly  in  the  wrong — 
he  took  a  stroll  about  noon,  down  the  patn  leading  to  the 
park  gates.  They  all  three  had  cigars  in  their  mouths,  Tit- 
mouse walking  between  them,  as  odious-looking  a  little 
puppy,  sure,  as  man  ever  saw — puffing  out  his  smoke  slowly, 
and  with  half-closed  eye,  his  right  hand  stuck  into  his  coat 
pocket,  and  resting  on  his  hip.  These  three  figures — Heaven 


TEN  THOUSAND  A-YEAtt.  461 

save  the  mark !— were  the  new  lord  of  Yatton  and  his  select 
friends ! 

"  By  jingo,  surely  here  comes  a  parson,"  quoth  Titmouse  ; 
"  what  the  d— 1  can  he  want  with  me  ?  "— Twas  Dr.  Tatham, 
who  slowly  approached  them,  dressed  in  his  Sunday  suit, 
and  leaning  on  his  old-fashioned  walking-stick,  given  him 
many,  many  years  ago  by  the  deceased  Mrs.  Aubrey. 

'  Let's  have  some  sport,"  said  Fitz-Snooks. 

"  We  must  look  devilish  serious— no  grinning  till  the 
proper  time,"  said  Yahoo. 

"  Hallo— you,  sir !  "  commenced  Titmouse, "  who  are  you  ?  '* 
Dr.  Tatham  took  off  his  hat,  bowed,  and  was  passing  on. 

"Den&ish  cool,  upon— my— soul— sir  ?  "  said  Titmouse,  stop- 
ping, and  staring  impudently  at  the  worthy  little  doctor,  who 
seemed  taken  quite  by  surprise. 

"  My  worthy  old  gentleman,"  said  Yahoo,  with  mock  re- 
spect, '"  are  you  aware  who  it  was  that  asked  you  a  ques- 
tion?" 

"I  am  not,  sir,"  replied  Dr.  Tatham  quietly,  but  reso- 
lutely. 

"  My  name  is  Tittlebat  Titmouse,  at  your  service— and  you 
are  now  in  my  grounds,"  said  Titmouse,  approaching  him 
with  an  impudent  air. 

"  Have  I  really  the  honor  to  address  Mr.  Titmouse  ?  "  in- 
quired Dr.  Tatham,  somewhat  incredulously. 

"  Why,  'pon  my  life  I  think  so,  unless  I'm  changed  lately  ; 
and  by  Jove,  sir— wow,  who  are  you  ?" 

"  I  am  Dr.  Tatham,  sir,  the  vicar  of  Yatton  :  I  had  intend- 
ed calling  at  the  Hall  to  offer  my  compliments  ;  but  I  fear  I 
am  intruding- — " 

'•  Devil  a  bit— no,  'pon  honor,  no !  you're  a  very  good  old 
fellow.  I  don't  doubt— is  that  little  church  outside,  yours  ?  " 

"  It  is,  sir,"  replied  Dr.  Tatham  seriously  and  sternly ;  his 
manner  completely  abashing  the  presumptuous  little  cox- 
comb who  addressed  him. 

"  Oh— well— I— I— 'pon  my  soul,  happy  to  see  you,  sir— 
you'll  find  something  to  eat  in  the  Hall,  I  dare  say— 

"  Do  you  preach  in  that  same  little  church  of  yours  next 
Sunday?"  inquired  Mr-  Yahoo,  whose  gross  countenance 
filled  Dr.  Tatham  with  unspeakable  aversion. 

"  I  preach  there  every  Sunday,  sir,  twice,"  he  replied,  grave- 
ly and  distantly. 

"You  see,  sir,"  lisped  Fitz-Snooks,  "the  prayers  are  so— so 
—devilish  long  and  tiresome— if  you  could-eh  ?— shorten  em 
a  little  ? " 

Dr.  Tatham  slowly  turned  away  from  them,  and,  disregard- 
ing their  calls  to  him,  though  their  tone  of  voice  was  greatly 
altered,  walked  back  again  towards  the  gate,  and  quitted  the 
park,  for  the  first  time  in  his  life,  with  feelings  of  mortal  re- 
pugnance. On  reaching  his  little  study,  he  sat  down  in  his 
old  arm  chair,  and  fell  into  a  sad  reverie  that  lasted  more 


462  TEN  THOUSAND  A-YEAR.  ' 

than  an  hour,  and  then  he  got  up  to  go  and  see  the  old  blind 
stag-hound  fed— and  he  looked  at  it,  licking  his  hand  with 
feelings  of  unusual  tenderness :  and  the  little  Doctor  shed  a 
tear  or  two  as  he  patted  its  smooth  gray  old  head. 

On  Saturday  morning,  Mr.  Titmouse,  at  Mr.  Gammon's  in- 
stance, had  fixed  to  go  over  the  estate,  accompanied  by  that 
gentleman,  and  by  Mr.  Waters  and  Dickons,  to  give  all  the 
information  required  of  them,  and  point  out  the  position  and 
extent  of  the  property.  To  an  eye  capable  of  appreciating  it, 
in  what  admirable  order  was  everything!  but  Titmouse 
quickly  tired  of  it,  and  when  about  a  mile  trom  the  Hall,  dis- 
covered that  he  had  left  his  cigar  box  behind  him  ;  at  which 
he  expressed  infinite  concern,  and,  greatly  to  the  annoyance 
of  Gammon,  and  the  contempt  of  his  two  bailiffs,  insisted  on 
returning  home,  so  they  re-entered  the  park.  How  beautiful 
it  was  !  Its  gently  undulating  service,  smooth  as  if  over- 
spread with  green  velvet ;  trees,  great  and  small,  single  and 
in  clumps,  standing  in  positions  so  picturesque  and  com- 
manding ;  the  broad,  babbling,  clear  trout-stream  winding 
through  every  part  of  the  park,  with  here  and  there  a  mimic 
fall,  seen  faintly  flashing  and  glistening  in  the  distance ; 
herds  of  deer  suddenly  startled  amid  their  green  pastures 
and  silent  shades,  and  moving  off  with  graceful  ease 
and  rapidity;  here  and  there  a  rustic  bridge  over  the 
stream  ;  here  an  old  stone  bench  placed  on  an  elevation  com- 
manding an  extensive  prospect;  there  a  kind  of  grotto,  or  an 
ivy-covered  summer-house ;  then  the  dense,  extensive,  and 
gloomy  woods,  forming  a  semi-circular  sweep  round  the  back 
of  the  Hall ;  all  around,  nearly  as  far  as  the  eye  could  reach, 
land  of  every  kind  in  the  highest  state  of  cultivation,  plenti- 
fully stocked  with  fine  cattle,  and  interspersed  with  snug 
and  substantial  farms. 

All  this,  thought  Titmouse,  might  do  very  well  for  those 
who  fancied  that  sort  of  thing ;  but  as  for  /m«,  how  the  devil 
could  he  have  thought  of  leaving  his  cigars  behind  him ! 
Where,  he  wondered,  were  Yahoo  and  Fitz-Snooks  ?  "  and 
quickened  his  pace  homeward. 

On  Gammon  the  scene  they  had  been  witnessing  had  made 
a  profound  impression ;  and  as  his  attention  was  now  and 
and  then  called  off  from  contemplating  it  by  some  ignorant 
and  puerile  remark  of  the  proprietor  of  the  fine  domain,  he 
felt  a  momentary  exasperation  at  himself  for  the  part  he  had 
taken  in  the  expulsion  of  the  Aubreys,  and  the  introduction 
of  such  a  creature  as  Titmouse.  That  revived  certain  other 
thoughts,  which  led  him  into  speculations  of  a  description 
which  would  have  afforded  uneasiness  even  to  the  little  idiot 
beside  him,  could  he  have  been  made  aware  of  them.  But 
the  cloud  that  had  darkened  his  brow  was  dispelled  by  a 
word  or  two  of  Titmouse.  "  Mr.  Gammon,  'pon  my  soul 
you're  devilish  dull  to-day,"  said  he.  Gammon  started  ;  and 
with  his  winning  smile  and  cheerful  voice,  instantly  replied^ 


TEN  THOUSAND  A-YEAR.  463 

"  Oh,  Mr.  Titmouse,  I  was  only  thinking  how  happy  you  are ; 
and  that  you  deserve  it !  " 

v"  J  ?STi  P°n  my  soul  it  ought  all  to  have  been  mine  at  my 
birth !  Don  t  it  tire  you,  Mr.  Gammon,  to  walk  in  this  up-and- 
dowin?  z}S-2®Si  here-and-there  sort  of  way  ?  It  does  me,  'pon 
my  life  !  What  would  I  give  for  a  cigar  at  this  moment !  'f 

1  he  next  day  was  the  Sabbath,  tranquil  and  beautiful ;  and 
rust  as  the  little  tinkling  bell  of  Yatton  church  had  ceased, 
Dr.  ratham  rose,  in  his  reading-desk,  and  commenced  the 
prayers.  The  church  was  quite  full,  for  every  one  was  natu- 
rally anxious  to  catch  a  glimpse  of  the  new  tenants 
of  the  Squire's  pew.  It  was  empty,  however,  till  about 
five  minutes  after  the  service  had  commenced,  when  a 

gentleman  walked  slowly  up  to  the  church-door;  and 
avmg  whispered  an  inquiry  of  the  old  pew-opener  which 
was  the  Squire's  pew,  she  led  him  into  it— all  eyes  set- 
tied  upon  him,  and  all  were  struck  with  his  appearance,  his 
calm  keen  features,  and  gentlemanly  figure.  'Twas,  of  course, 
Gammon;  who,  with  the  utmost  decorum  and  solemnity 
having  stood  for  near  a  minute  with  his  hat  covering  his  face, 
during  which  time  he  reflected  that  Miss  Aubrey  had  sat  in 
that  pew  on  the  last  occasion  of  his  attendance  at  the  church, 
turned  round,  and  behaved  with  the  greatest  seriousness  and 
reverence  throughout  the  service,  paying  marked  attention 
to  the  sermon.  Gammon  was  an  unbeliever,  but  he  thought 
Dr.  Tatham  an  amiable  and  learned  enthusiast,  but  \yho  was 
most  probably  in  earnest ;  and  he  felt  disposed  to  admit,  as  his 
eye  glanced  round  the  attentive  and  decent  congregation, 
that  the  sort  of  thing  was  not  without  its  advantages.  Al- 
most all  present  took  him  for  Titmouse,  and  watched  every 
turn  of  his  countenance  with  intense  interest;  and,  in  their 
simplicity,  they  rejoiced  that  Mr.  Aubrey's  successor  was, 
at  all  events,  so  grave  and  respectable  looking  a  man ;  and 
they  fancied  that  he  frequently  thought,  with  kindness  and 
regret,  of  those  whose  seat  he  was  occupying.  About  the  mid- 
dle of  the  service,  the  doors  of  the  church  being  wide  open,  the 
congregation  beheld  three  gentlemen  smoking  cigars,  and 
laughing  and  talking  together,  approaching  the  porch.  They 
were  dressed  very  finely  indeed  ;  and  were  supposed  to  be 
some  of  the  great  friends  of  the  new  Squire.  They  stopped 
when  within  a  few  yards  of  the.church ;  and  after  whispering 
together  for  a  moment,  one  of  them,  having  expelled  a  mouth- 
ful of  smoke,  stepped  forward  to  the  door,  holding  his  cigar 
in  one  hand,  and  with  the  other  taking  off  his  hat.  There 
was  a  faint  smirk  on  his  face,  (for  he  did  not  catch  the  stern 
countenance  of  Gammon  anxiously  directed  towards  him,) 
till  he  beheld  Dr.  Tatham's  solemn  eye  fixed  upon  him,  while 
he  made  a  momentary  pause.  Titmouse  blushed  scarlet ; 
made  a  hesitating  but  most  respectable  bow ;  and  stepping 
back  a  few  paces,  replaced  his  hat  on  his  head,  and  lit  his* 
cigar  from  that  of  Mr.  Fitz-Snooks,  within  view,  perhaps* 


464  TEN  THOUSAND  A-YEAR. 

unconsciously,  of  more  than  half  the  congregation.  Then 
the  three  gentleman,  after  Mr.  Titmouse  had  spoken  a  word 
or  two  to  them,  burst  out  into  a  laugh,  and  quitted  the  church- 
yard. 


j  CHAPTER  XX. 

AUBREY'S  sudden  plunge  into  the  cold  and  deep  stream  of 
trouble,  had — the  first  shock  over- -served,  as  it  were,  to 
brace  his  nerves.  'Tis  at  such  a  time,  and  on  such  an  oc- 
casion, that  the  temper  and  quality  of  the  soul  are  tried ; 
whether  it  be  weak  in  seeming  strength,  or  strong  in  seeming 
weakness.  How  many  are  there,  walking  with  smiling  com- 
placent confidence  along  the  flowery  bank,  who,  if  suddenly 
bidden  to  strip  and  enter,  would  turn  pale  and  tremble  as  they 
reluctantly  prepared  to  obey  the  stern  mandate ;  and,  after  a 
convulsive  shudder,  a  faint  shriek,  a  brief  struggle,  disappear 
from  the  surface  paralyzed,  never  to  be  seen  again !  In  such 
a  point  of  view,  let  me  hope  that  the  situation  of  Aubrey,  one 
of  deepening  difficulty  and  danger — the  issue  of  which,  hid 
in  the  darkness  of  the  future,  no  earthly  intelligence  could 
predict— will  excite  in  the  thoughtful  reader  an  anxiety  not 
un  mingled  with  confidence. 

The  enervating  effects  of  inactivity  upon  the  physical 
structure  and  energies  of  mankind,  few  can  have  failed  to 
observe.  Rust  is  more  fatal  to  metal  than  wear.  A  thorough- 
bred racer,  if  confined  in  stable  or  paddock,  or  a  boxer,  born 
of  the  finest  muscular  make,  if  prematurely  incarcerated  in 
a  jail,  will,  after  a  few  years,  become  quite  unable  to  compete 
with  those  vastly  their  inferiors  in  natural  endowments  and 
capabilities ;  however,  they  may,  with  careful  training,  be  re- 
stored to  the  full  enjoyment  and  exercise  of  their  powers. 
Thus  is  it  with  the  temper  and  intellect  of  man,  which, 
secluded  from  the  scenes  of  appropriate  stimulus  and 
exercise,  become  relaxed  and  weakened.  What  would 
have  become  of  the  glorious  spirit  and  powers  of  Achilles, 
if  his  days  had  all  melted  away  in  the  tender,  delicate, 
emasculating  inactivity  and  indulgence  of  the  court  of 
Lycomedes  ?  The  language  of  the  ancient  orator  concern- 
ing his  art  may  be  applied  to  life  that  not  only  its  greatness, 
but  its  enjoyment,  consists  in  action — action— ACTION.  The 
feelings,  for  instance,  may  become  so  morbidly  sensitive,  as 
to  give  an  appearance  of  weakness  to  the  whole  character ;  and 
this  is  likely  to  be  specially  the  case  of  one  born  with  those 
of  superior  liveliness  and  delicacy,  if  he  be  destined  to  move 
only  in  the  regions  of  silent  and  profound  abstraction  and 
contemplation — in  those  refined  regions  which  may  be  termed 
a  sort  of  paradise,  where  every  conceivable  source  of  enjoy. 


TEN  THOUSAND  A-YEAR.  465 

jnent  is  cultivated  for  the  fortunate  and  fastidious  occupants 
i  -u  7ery  uttermost  and  all  those  innumerable  things 
which  fret,  worry,  and  harass  the  temper,  the  head,  and  the 
heart  of  the  dwellers  m  the  rude  regions  of  ordinary  life- 
most  anxiously  weeded  out  instead  of  entering  into  the  throng 
ol  lite,  and  taking  part  in  its  constant  caries  and  conflicts 
—scenes  which  require  all  his  energies  always  in  exercise 
to  keep  his  place  and  escape  being  trodden  underfoot.  Rely 
upon  it,  that  the  man  who  feels  a  tendency  to  shrink  from 
collision  with  his  fellows,  to  run  away  with  distaste  or  ap- 
prehension from  the  great  practical  business  of  life,  does  not 
enjoy  moral  or  intellectual  health ;  will  quickly  contract  a 
silly  conceit  and  fastidiousness,  or  sink  into  imbecility  and 
misanthropy ;  and  should  devoutly  thank  Providence  for  the 
occasion,  however  momentarily  startling  and  irritating, 
which  stirs  him  out  of  his  lethargy,  his  cowardly  lethargy, 
and  sends  him  among  his  fellows— puts  him,  in  a  manner, 
upon  a  course  of  training ;  upon  an  experience  of  compara- 
tive suffering,  it  may  be  of  sorrow,  requiring  the  exercise  of 
po\yers  of  which  he  had  before  scarcely  been  conscious,  and 
giving  him  presently  the  exhilarating  consciousness  that  he 
is  exhibiting  himself— a  MAN. 

"  It  is  probable,"  says  a  very  acute  and  powerful  writer  of 
the  present  day,  Mr.  Foster,  in  his  Essay  on  "  Decision  of 
Character"-  -u  that  the  men  most  distinguished  for  decision, 
have  not,  in  general,  possessed  a  large  share  of  tenderness ; 
and  it  is  easy  to  imagine  that  the  laws,  according  to  which 
oar  nature  is  formed,  will  with  great  difficulty  allow  the 
combination  of  the  refined  sensibilities,  with  a  hardy,  never 
shrinking,  never  yielding  constancy.  Is  it  not  almost  of  the 
essence  of  this  constancy,  to  be  free  from  even  the  perception 
of  such  impressions  as  cause  a  mind,  weak  through  suscept- 
ibility, to  relax,  or  to  waver  ? — No  doubt,  this  firmness  con- 
sists partly  in  overcoming  feeling— but  it  may  consist  partly, 
too,  in  not  having  them."  The  case  I  am  contemplating  is  per- 
haps the  difficult,  though  by  no  means,  I  am  persuaded,  un- 
common one— of  a  person  possessing  these  delicate  sensi- 
bilities, these  lively  feelings ;  yet  with  a  native  strength  of 
character,  beneath  which,  when  the  occasion  for  its  display 
has  arisen — when  it  is  placed  in  a  scene  of  constant  and 
compulsory  action,  will  fully  evince  and  vindicate  itself.  It 
is  then  "  that  another  essential  principle  of  decision  of  char- 
acter," to  quote  from  another  part  of  the  same  essay,  u  will 
be  displayed ;  namely,  a  total  incapability,  of  surrendering 
to  indifference  or  delay  the  serious  determinations  of  the 
mind.  A  strenuous  WILL  accompanies  the  conclusions  of 
thought,  and  constantly  urges  the  utmost  efforts  for  their 
practical  accomplishment.  The  intellect  is  invested,  as  it 
were,  with  a  glowing  atmosphere  of  passion,  under  the  in- 
fluence of  which  the  cold  dictates  of  reason  take  fire,  and 
spring  into  active  powers." 


466  TEN  THOUSAND  A-YE^E. 

There  is,  indeed,  nothing  like  throwing  a  man  of  the  de- 
scription  we  are  considering  upon  his  own  resources,  and 
C9mpelling  him  to  exertion.  Listen,  ye  languid  and  often 
gifted  victims  of  indolence  and  ennui,  to  the  noble  language 
of  one  blessed  with  as  great  powers  as  perhaps  were  ever 
vouchsafed  to  man— Edmund  Burke ! 

"  DIFFICULTY  is  a  severe  instructor,  set  over  us  by  the 
Supreme  ordinance  of  a  parental  guardian  and  legislator,  who 
knows  us  better  than  we  know  ourselves,  as  he  loves  us  bet- 
ter, too.  Pater  ipse  colendi,  hand  facilem  vesse  mam  oluit. 
He  that  wrestles  with  us,  strengthens  our  nerves  and  sharp- 
ens our  skill ;  our  antagonist  is  our  helper.  This  amicable 
contest  with  difficulty,  obliges  us  to  an  intimate  acquaintance 
with  our  object,  and  compels  us  to  consider  it  in  all  its  re- 
lations ;  it  will  not  suffer  us  to  be  superficial." 

The  man,  moreover,  whose  disposition  is  one  of  sterling 
excellence,  despite  the  few  foibles  which  it  may  have  con- 
tracted in  comparative  solitude  and  inactivity,  when  he  is 
compelled  to  mix  indiscriminately  with  the  great  family  of 
man,  oh,  how  patient  and  tolerant  becomes  he  of  the  weakness 
and  errors  of  others,  when  thus  constantly  reminded  of  and 
made  to  feel,  his  own !  Oh,  how  pitiful !  how  very  pitiful  is 
he ! — how  his  heart  yearns  and  overflows  with  love,and  mercy, 
and  charity  towards  his  species,  individtially— whose  eye 
looks  oft  on  their  grievous  privations,  their  often  incurable 
distress  and  misery ! — and  who  in  the  spirit  of  a  heavenly 
philanthropy  penetrates  even  to  those  deserted  quarters — 

"  Where  hopeless  anguish  pours  her  moan, 
And  lonely  want  retires  to  die  !" 

It  may  be  that  some  of  the  preceding  observations  are  ap- 
plicable to  many  individuals  of  the  purest  and  most  amiable 
characters,  and  powerful  and  cultivated  intellects,  in  the 
higher  classes  of  society,  whose  affluence  exempts  them  from 
the  necessity  of  actively  intermingling  with  the  concerns  of 
life,  and  feeling  the  consciousness  of  individual  responsi- 
bility, of  having  a  personal  necessity  for  anxious  care  and 
exertion.  A  position  of  real  precariousness  and  danger,  is 
that  which  is  requisite  for  developing  the  energies  of  a  man 
of  high  moral  and  intellectual  character,  as  it  will  expose 
to  destruction  one  of  a  contrary  description. 

I  have  endeavored,  in  previous  portions  of  this  history, 
to  delineate  faithfully  the  character  of  Mr.  Aubrey — one 
(how  idle  and  childish  would  have  been  the  attempt !)  by  no 
means  perfect,  yet  with  very  high  qualities ;  a  noble  simplic- 
ity; a  man,  generous,  confiding,  sincere,  affectionate :  pos- 
sessing  a  profound  sense  of  religion,  really  influencing 
his  conduct  in  life ;  an  intellect  of  a  superior  order,  or 
a  practical  turn,  of  a  masculine  strength— as  had  been 
evidenced  by  his  successful  academical  career,  his  thor- 


TEN  THOUSAND  A-YEAB.  467 

ough  mastery  of  some  of  the  most  important  and  diffi- 
cult branches  of  human  knowledge,  and  by  his  superior 
aptitude  for  public  business.  He  was  at  the  same  time 
possessed  of  a  sensibility  that  was  certainly  excessive  He 
had  a  morbid  tendency  to  pensiveness,  if  not  melancholy, 
wmcn,  with  a  teebte  physical  constitution,  was  partly  derived 
from  his  mother  and  partly  accounted  for  by  the  species  of 
lite  which  he  had  led.  From  his  early  youth  he  had  been 
addicted  to  close  and  severe  study,  which  had  given  per- 
manence and  strength  to  his  naturally  contemplative  turn 
He  had  not,  moreover,  with  too  many  possessed  of  his  means 
and  station,  entered,  just  at  the  dawn  and  bloom  of  manhood, 
upon  that  course  of  dissipation  which  is  a  sure  and  speedy 
means  of  destroying  "  the  freshness  of  thought  and  of  feel- 
ing, and  inducing  a  lowered  tone  of  feeling,  and  a  callous- 
ness which  some  seem  to  consider  necessary  to  enable  them 
to  pass  through  life  easily  and  agreeably.  He,  on  the  con- 
trary, had  stepped  out  of  the  gloom  and  solitude  of  the 
cloister  into  the  pure  and  peaceful  region  of  dcmestic  life, 
with  all  its  hallowed  and  unutterable  tendernesses,  where 
the  affections  grew  luxuriantly;  in  the  constant  society  of 
such  women  as  his  mother,  his  sister,  his  wife,  and  latterly 
his  lovely  children.  Then  he  was  possessed,  all  this  while, 
of  a  fine  fortune— one  which  voiced  him  far  beyond  the  neces. 
sity  for  anxiety  or  exertion.  With  such  tastes  as  these,  such  a 
temperament  as  his,  and  leading  such  a  life,  as  his,  is  it  sur- 
prising that  the  tone  of  his  feelings  should  have  become 
relaxed?  The  three  or  four  years  which  he  had  spent  in, 
Parliament,  when  he  plunged  into  its  fierce  and  absorbing 
excitement  with  characteristic  ardor  and  determination, 
though  calculated  to  sharpen  the  faculties,  and  draw  forth 
the  resources  of  his  intellect,  subjected  him  to  those  alterna- 
tions of  excitement  and  depression,  those  extremes  of  action 
and  reaction,  which  were  not  calculated  to  correct  his  mor» 
bid  tendencies. 

Therefore  came  there  up  to  him  a  messenger  from  Heaven, 
with  trouble  and  affliction  in  his  countenance,  telling  him 
to  descend  from  the  happy  solitude  of  his  high  mountain, 
into  the  dismal  hubbub  and  conflict  in  the  plain  beneath. 
He  came  down  with  humility  and  awe,  and  with  reverent 
resignation;  and  was —instantly  surrounded!— 

A  weak  man  would  have  been  confused  and  stunned,  and 
so  sunk  helpless  into  the  leaden  arms  of  despair.  But  it  was 
not  so  with  Aubrey.  There  was  that  dormant  energy  with- 
in, which,  when  appealed  to,  quickly  shook  off  the  weakness 
contracted  by  inaction,  and  told  him  to  be  up  and  doing  ; 
and  that  not  with  the  fitful  energy  of  mere  impulse,  but  the 
constant  strength  of  a  well  regulated  mind,  conscious  of  its 
critical  position;  and  also  of  a  calm  inflexible  determination 
to  vanquish  difficulty,  and  if  possible  escape  the  imminent 
danger,  however  long  and  doubtful  might  prove  the  conflict. 


468  TEN  THOUSAND  A-TEAE. 

Above  all,  he  was  consoled  and  blessed  by  the  conviction, 
that  nothing  could  befall  him  that  was  not  the  ordination  of 
Providence, 

"  supremely  wise, 

Alike  in  what  it  gives  and  what  denies  ; " 

that  His  was  the  ordering  of  the  sunshine  and  the  gloom, 
the  tempest  and  the  calm  of  life.  This  was  to  Aubrey— this 
is — as  the  humble  writer  of  these  pages  (who  has  had  in  his 
time  his  measure  of  anxiety  and  affliction)  has  in  his  soul  a 
profound  and  intimate  persuasion  and  conviction  of — the 
only  source  of  real  fortitude  and  resignation,  amidst  the  per- 
plexities, and  afflictions  and  dangers  of  life.  Depend  upon  it, 
that  a  secret  and  scarce-acknowledged  disbelief,  or  at  least 
doubt  and  distrust  of  the  very  existence  of  God,  and  of  his 
government  of  the  world — HIS  REAL  PRESENCE  AND  INTERFER- 
ENCE with  the  men  and  the  things  of  the  world — lies  at  the 
bottom  of  almost  all  impatience  and  despair  under  adverse 
circumstances.  How  can  he  be  impatient,  or  despairing, 
who  believes  not  only  the  existence  of  God  and  his  moral 
government  of  the  world,  but  that  he  has  mercifully  youch- 
saved  to  reveal  and  declare  expressly  that  the  infliction  of 
suffering  and  sorrow  is  directly  from  himself  and  designed 
solely  for  the  advantage  of  his  creatures  ?  If  ye  endure 
chastening •,  God  dealeth  with  you  as  with  sons  ;  for  what  son 
is  he  whom  the  father  chasteneth  not  f  We  have  had  fathers 
of  our  flesh  which  corrected  us,  and  we  gave  them  reverence  ; 
shall  we  not  much  rather  be  in  subjection  unto  the  Father  of 
spirits,  and  live?  For  they  verily  for  a  few  days  chastened 
tts  after  their  own  pleasure  ;  but  he  for  our  profit,  that  we 
might  be  partakers  of  his  holiness.  JVbw,  no  chastening  for 
the  present  seemeth  to  be  joyous,  but  grievous  :  nevertheless 
afterwards  it  yieldeth  the  peaceable  fruit  of  righteousness  unto 
them  which  are  exercised  thereby.  Wherefore  lift  up  the 
hands  which  hang  down,  and  the  feeble  knees.  While  thus 
benignantly  teacheth  the  voice  of  God,  thought  Aubrey, 
shall  I  rather  incline  mine  ear  to  the  blighting  whisper  of 
the  Evil  One— a  liar,  and  the  father  of  a  lie,  who  would  fain 
that  I  should  become  a  fool,  saying  within  my  heart  there  is 
no  God—or,  if  I  cannot  but  believe  that  there  is  one,  provok- 
ing me  to  charge  Him  foolishly,  to  curse  Him  and  die?  Not 
so,  however,  had  Aubrey  read  the  Scriptures— not  so  had  he 
learned  the  Christian  religion. 

The  last  time  that  we  caught  a  glimpse  of  the  ruined  family, 
they  had  arrived  nearly  at  the  end  of  their  long  and  melan- 
choly journey  from  Yatton  to  the  metropolis.  When  before  had 
such  been  the  character  of  their  iourney  to  town  ?  Had  they 
not  even  looked  forward  with  pleasure  towards  the  brilliant 
gayeties  of  the  season :  their  re-entrance  into  an  extensive  and 
splendid  circle  of  friends— and  he  into  the  delightful  excite- 


TEN  TSOUSAND  A-YEAR. 

ment  of  political  life— the  opening  of  the  parliamentary  cam- 
paign?  Alas,  how  changed  now  all  this!  how  gloomy  and 
threatening  the  aspect  of  the  metropolis,  whose  dusky  out- 
skirts they  were  entering!  With  what  feelings  of  op- 
pression—of vague  indefinite  apprehension— did  they  now 
approach  it :  their  spirits  heavy,  their  hearts  bleeding  with 
their  recent  severance  from  Yatton !  Now,  distress,  deser- 
tion, dismay,  seemed  associated  with  the  formidable  name  of 

London  "  They  had  now  no  place  of  their  own  awaiting, 
thoroughly  prepared  for  them,  their  welcome  arrival— but 
must  drive  to  some  quiet  and  unexpensive  family  hotel  for 
temporary  shelter.  As  their  eyes  caught  familiar  point 
alter  point  in  their  route  through  the  suburbs— now  passed 
at  a  moderate  pace,  with  a  modest  pair  of  horses ;  formerly 
dashed  past  by  them  in  their  carriage  and  four— there  were 
very  few  words  spoken  by  those  within  the  carriage.  Both 
the  children  were  fast  asleep.  Poor  Kate,  as  they  entered 
Piccadilly,  burst  into  tears :  her  pent-up  feelings  suddenly 
gave  way,  and  she  cried  heartily ;  Mrs.  Aubrey  also  shed- 
ding tears.  Mr.  Aubrey  was  calm,  but  evidently  oppressed 
with  profound  anxiety.  Still  he  affectionately  grasped  their 
hands,  and,  in  something  designed  for  a  cheeful  tone  and 
manner,  besought  them  to  restrain  their  feelings,  and  thank 
Heaven  that  so  far  they  had  got  on  safely. 

"  I  shall  be  better  presently,  Charles,  said  Miss  Aubrey 
passionately,  burying  her  face  in  her  handkerchief,  "  but  I 
i'eel  quite  afraid  of  London  !  " 

Over  they  pavement  they  rattled,  meeting  carriages  roll- 
ing in  all  directions — for  it  was  about  the  dinner  hour,  and 
in  the  height  of  the  season ;  and  it  was  the  casual  but  vivid 
evidence  thus  afforded  of  their  desolate  position,  this 
sudden  glimpse  of  old  familiar  scenes,  which  had  momen- 
tarily overcome  the  fortitude  of  Miss  Aubrey.  They  drove 
to  a  quiet  family  hotel  in  a  retired  street  running  parallel 
with  Piccadilly ;  they  were  all  wearied,  both  in  mind  and 
body,  and  after  a  very  slight  repast,  and  much  anxious  and 
desponding  conversation,  they  bade  each  other  affectionate 
adieus,  and  retired  to  rest.  They  rose  in  the  morning  re- 
freshed with  repose,  and  in  a  much  more  tranquil  mood  of 
mind  than  could  have  been  expected. 

"  Now,  we  enter,"  said  Aubrey,  with  a  cheerful  smile, 
"  upon  the  real  business  of  life ;  so  we  must  discard  sentiment 
—we  must  not  think  of  the  past,  but  the  future." 

At  their  request,  they,  shortly  after  breakfast,  accompanied 
him  to  the  house  agent,  who  had  been  commissioned  by  Mr. 
Runnington  to  look  out  two  or  three  residences  such  as,  on 
their  arrival  in  town,  they  might  easily  select  from.  One 
was  particularly  recommended  to  them ;  and  after  due 
inquiry,  within  three  days  after  their  arrival  in  town, 
they  engaged  it.  'Twas  a  small,  but  convenient,  airy  and 
comfortable  house,  within  five  uiintues'  walk  of  Hyde  Park, 


470  TEN  THOUSAND  A-YEAB. 

and  situated  in  Vivian  street— a  recent  street— and  as  quiet' 
and  retired  as  they  could  have  wished.  The  rent,  too  was 
moderate— fifty  pounds-a-year.  Though  none  of  the  houses 
in  the  street  were  large,  they  were  all  strictly  private  residen- 
ces, and  had  an  air  of  thorough  respectability.  Mr.  Aubrey's 
house  had  but  one  window  to  the  dining-room,  and  two  to 
the  drawing-room.  The  passage  and  staircase  were  sufficiently 
commodious,  as  were  the  rooms.  At  the  back  of  the  house 
/was  a  small  garden,  about  twenty  yards  in  length,  and  about 
'ten  yards  in  width,  with  several  lilacs,  laburnums,  and 
shrubs ;  and  a  considerable  portion  of  the  wall  was  covered 
with  ivy.  Was  not  this  a  delightful  place  for  the  children  to 
play  about-  in  ?  The  back  parlor,  a  somewhat  small  room 
certainly,  looked  into  this  garden  ;  and  that  room  was  at  once 
appropriated  to  a  study  for  Mr.  Aubrey.  Within  a  week's 
time,  all  their  luggage,  furniture,  etc. .,  had  arrived  in  town 
from  Yatton ;  and  they  had  quite  sufficient  to  furnish  their 
little  residence  out  of  the  wreck  of  the  furniture  and  equip- 
ments of  the  old  Hall— adapted,  as  it  was,  under  the  tasteful 
superintendence  of  Mrs.  and  Miss  Aubrey,  with  equal  regard 
to  elegance,  simplicity,  and  economy.  How  busy  were  they 
all  for  a  fortnight !  Many  and  many  an  irrepressible  sigh, 
and  rebellious  tear,  would  the  sight  of  these  old  familiar  ob- 
jects, in  their  new  situation,  occasion  there !  Some  half-dozen 
family  pictures  hung  upon  the  wall.  Over  the  mantelpiece 
was  suspended  a  piece  of  beautiful  embroidery— by  poor  old 
Mrs.  Aubrey,  many  years  before — of  the  arms  ol  the  family.  In 
the  dining-room  was  the  old  high-backed  chair  in  which  she 
had  sat  for  twenty  years  and  more.  In  the  drawing-room 
was  Miss  Aubrey's  favorite  cabinet,  and  Mrs.  Aubrey's  piano ; 
and  in  both  the  rooms  were  to  be  seen  everywhere  the  delicate 
traces  of  dear,  dear,  graceful,  and  elegant  woman— touching- 
nothing  that  she  adorns  not !  What  with  the  silk  curtains, 
and  a  carpet  of  simple  but  tasteful  pattern,  and  the  various 
articles  of  furniture  and  ornaments,  all  possessing  a  kind  of 
old  family  air— all  from  Yatton,  I  declare  there  was  a  kind 
of  richness  about  the'  general  aspect  of  the  room  ;  and  when 
Mrs.  Aubrey  and  Miss  Aubrey  came  to  fetch  Mr.  Aubrey  out 
of  his  study  to  witness  the  completion  of  their  labors,  he 
gazed  round  him,  looked  at  each  object,  and  then  at  the 
two  dear  fond  beings  standing  beside  him,  awaiting  his  opin- 
ion with  womanly  eagerness ;  but  he  could  not  express  his 
feelings.  He  kissed  each  of  them  very  tenderly,  and  in  si- 
lence, and  then  they  were  a  little  overcome.  His  study,  also, 
though  very  small,  was  as  snug  and  comfortable  as  a  book- 
worm could  desire.  All  the  sides  were  covered  with  books, 
and  in  the  middle  were  the  library-table  and  arm-chair 
which  he  had  used  in  Grosvenor  Street,  and  which  were 
certainly  on  too  large  a  scale  for  the  little  room  to  which  they 
had  been  removed.  That  they  were  not  incessantly  and  very 
painfully  reminded  of  the  contrast  afforded  by  their  present 


TEN  THOUSAND  A-YEAR.  471 

to  their  former  circumstances,  I  do  not  pretend  to  assert ;  but 
it  very,  very  seldom  formed  a  topic  of  conversation  between 
any  of  them.  When,  however,  the  little  bustle  and  occupa- 
tion of  the  arranging  their  house  was  over,  and  Mrs.  Aubrey 
and  Kate  were  left  a  good  deal  to  themselves— Mr.  Aubrey 
being  either  absent  from  home,  or  in  his  study  engaged 
in  matters  of  the  last  importance  to  them  all— then  they 
would  talk  together  with  increasing  eagerness  and  excitement 
about  past  times,  and  their  recent  troubles  and  bereave- 
ments ;  and  not  displaying  then — sweet  souls  ! — quite  that 
degree  of  resignation  and  fortitude  which  they  strove  to 
exhibit  in  the  presence  of  Mr.  Aubrey. 

"  Some  natural  tears  they  dropt,  but  wiped  them  soon. 

They  passed  a  good  deal  of  their  time  in-doors  in  needle- 
work, practical  family  needlework,  an  art  in  which  they  were 
not  particularly  accomplished,  but  which  they  quickly  ac- 
quired from  a  sempstress  whom  they  kept  engaged  con- 
stantly in  the  house  for  several  weeks.  Then  sometimes 
they  would  sit  down  to  the  piano ;  at  other  times  they  would 
read— on  all  occasions,  however,  frequently  falling  into  con- 
versation on  the  all-engrossing  topic  of  their  expulsion  from 
Yatton.  Now  and  then,  they  could  scarcely  refrain  from  a 
melancholy  smile,  when  they  remarked  upon  their  shrunken 
personal  importance.  "  Really,  Agnes,"  said  one  day  Miss 
Aubrey,  "  I  feel  just  as  one  can  fancy  a  few  poor  newly  shorn 
sheep  must  feel !  So  light  and  cold !  So  much  less  than  they 
were  half  an  hour  before !  Surely  they  must  hardly  know 
what  to  make  of  themselves !  " 

"  Then,  I  suppose,  mamma,"  said  Charles,  who  was  sitting 
on  a  stool  beside  them— making  believe  to  write  on  a  small 
slate—"  I  am  a  little  sheep,"  they  botli  looked  up  at  the  child 
with  silent  tenderness,  and  presently  thought  of  Him  who 
"  tempers  the  wind  to  the  shorn  lamb." 

Their  proximity  to  the  parks  was  delightful,  and  many  a 
pleasant  hour  did  they  pass  there  with  the  children ;  and  then 
returning  home,  would  occupy  themselves  with  writing 
letters— and  long  ones  they  usually  were— to  early  and  loved 
friends,  especially  to  Dr  Tatham,  with  whom  Miss  Aubrey 
kept  up  a  constant  correspondence.  I  ought  to  have  men- 
tioned before  that  Mr  Aubrey,  in  bringing  his  favorite  valet 
up  to  town  with  him  had  no  other  design  than,  with  that 
kind  though tfulness  for  which  he  was  remarkable,  to  have  an 
opportunity  of  securing  for  him  a  good  situation  ;  and  that 
he  succeeded  in  doing,  after  about  a  fortnight's  interval: 
but  the  poor  fellow  was  quite  confounded  when  he  first  heard 
that  he  was  to  quit  the  services  of  Mr.  Aubrey,  and  almost 
falling  on  his  knees,  begged  to  be  permitted  to  continue  and 
receive  no  wages,  and  he  should  be  a  happy  man.  Mr  Aubrey 
was,  however,  firm ;  and  on  parting  with  him,  which  he  did 


472  TEN  THOUSAND  A-YEAR. 

with  no  little  emotion,  put  two  guineas  into  his  hand  as  a 
present  and  wished  him  health  and  happiness.  The  poor 
fellow's  deep  distress  at  parting  with  the  family  sensibly 
affected  them  all,  and  reminded  them  vividly  of  one  of  the 
latest  and  bitterest  scenes  at  Yatton.  On  his  departure,  their 
little  establishment  consisted  but  of  three  female  servants,  a 
cook,  a  housemaid,  and  a  nursery-maid.  It  took  them  some 
little  time  to  familiarize  themselvs  with  the  attendance  of  a 
female  servant  at  dinner !  That  was  one  little  matter— and 
another  was  Charles'  now  and  then  complaining  of  being 
tired,  and  then  inquiring  why  his  mamma  did  not  drive  in 
the  carriage  as  she  used  to  do,  and  how  he  liked  to  go  with 
her?  which  brought  home  to  them,  in  a  lively  manner,  their 
altered  circumstances — their  fallen  fortunes.  Many,  many 
were  the  anxious  calculations  they  made  together  of  the  prob- 
able amount  of  their  annual  expenditure— which  at  length, 
inexperienced  as  they  were,  they  fixed  at  from  £300,  to  £500, 
including  everything ;  Mrs.  Aubrey  and  Miss  Aubrey 
eagerly  assuring  Mr.  Aubrey,  and  each  other,  that  as  for 
clothes— their  wardrobe  would,  with  care,  last  them  for  three 
or  four  years  to  come — so  that  that  was  an  item  which  might 
be  almost  altogether  excluded  from  the  account ;  except  by  the 
way,  the  children— yes  they  should  be  always  well-dressed ; 
that  all  agreed  upon.  Then  there  was  their  education— <>h 
Kate  would  see  to  that !  Could  they,  in  this  manner,  with 
rigid,  systematic  economy,  hold  on  their  way  for  a  year  or 
two?  was  a  question  they  often  asked  one  another,  with  beat- 
ing hearts.  If  they  could,  then,  they  said,  they  should  be 
happy;  for  they  had  health— they  had  peace  of  mind  :  their 
consciences  were  not  oppressed  by  a  sense  of  misconduct — 
and  they  were  able  to  put  their  trust  in  Providence. 

Mr.  Aubrey  resolved  to  live  in  strict  privacy ;  and  they 
communicated  their  residence  to  but  one  or  two  of  their 
numerous  friends,  and  to  them  only  in  confidence.  To  have 
acted  otherwise,  would  have  seriously  interfered  with  the 
arrangements  which,  long  ago  contemplated,  he  had  now 
fixed  upon ;  it  would  be  perpetually  calling  their  attention 
to  the  contrast  between  former  days  and  scenes,  and  the 
present :  it  would  disturb  their  feelings,  and  might,  more- 
over, subject  them  to  kind  and  generous  importunities  and 
offers,  which,  however  delicate,  would  be  exquisitely  painful 
and  trying  to  an  honorable  pride.  But  it  is  time  that  T  should 
proceed  to  give  a  more  particular  account  of  the  position,  the 
personal  feelings,  and  purposes  and  prospects  of  Mr.  Aubrey. 

From  the  moment  when  Aubrey  received  the  first  intima- 
tion of  the  desperate  assault  about  to  be  made  upon  his  fort- 
unes, he  felt  a  conviction,  whether  arising  from  weakness, 
or  superstition,  or  any  other  cause,  it  concerns  me  not  here 
to  say— that  the  issue" would  be  a  disastrous  one  for  him ;  and, 
the  first  alarm  and  confusion  over,  with  serious  calmness, with 
deep  anxiety,  addressed  himself  to  the  determination  of  his 


TEN  THOUSAND  A-YEAB.  473 

future  course  of  life.  A  man  of  his  refined  taste  and  feeling 
would  inevitably  appreciate  exquisitely — with  a  most  agoniz- 
ing intensity— the  loss  of  all  those  superior  enjoyments— the 
aelicice  of  life— to  which  he  had  been  from  his  birth  accustom- 
ed. Semper  enim  delicate  ac  molliter  vixit.  I  speak  not  here 
of  the  mere  exterior  "  appliances  and  means  "  of  wealth  and 
station,  but  of  the  fastidious  and  sensitive  condition  of  feel- 
ing and  temper,  which  such  a  state  of  things  is  calculated  to 
engender  in  a  person  of  his  description.  He  could  part  with 
the  one ;  but  how  could  he  divest  himself  of  the  other  ?  Even 
had  he  been  alone  in  the  world,  and  not  surrounded  with 
objects  of  the  tenderest  regard,  whose  safety  or  ruin  was 
involved  in  his  o\yn,  one  of  the  results  of  his  opponent's 
success — namely,  his  claim  to  the  mesne  profits — was  calculat- 
ed to  fetter  all  his  movements,  to  hang  like  a  millstone  round 
his  neck  ;  and  that  effect,  indeed,  it  had.  Still  he  played  the 
man — resolved  to  act  promptly,  and  with  the  best  considera- 
tion he  could  give  his  critical  position.  He  had  not  yet  reach- 
ed the  prime  of  life ;  had  a  fair  share  of  health ;  had  been 
blessed  with  the  inestimable  advantages  of  a  thorough— a 
first-rate  education— and,  above  all,  had  followed  out  his 
early  advantages  by  laborious  and  systematic  study ;  and  had 
not  only  made  accurate,  extensive,  and  valuable  acquisitions, 
but  learned  how  to  use  them— to  turn  them  to  practical  ac- 
count. What  would,  he  thought,  have  become  of  him,  had 
he— or  those  before  him— neglected  his  education  ?  Then  he 
had  acquired  a  considerable  familiarity  with  business-habits, 
in  the  House  of  Commons ;  and  had  friends  and  connections 
who  might  be  of  essential  service  to  him,  if  he  could  but  first 
succeed  in  acquiring  a  position  that  would  enable  him  to  avail 
himself  of  them.  Surely  all  these  were  cheering  considera- 
tions: subject,  however,  always  to  the  dreadful  drawback. to 
which  I  have  alluded.  Had  he  not  even  advantages  superior 
to  those  possessed  by  many  in  entering  upon  some  one  of  the 
scenes  of  honorable  struggle  for  a  livelihood,  and  for  even 
distinction  ?  He  surveyed  them  all  with  much  deliberation. 
The  army  and  navy  were  of  course  out  of  the  question.  1  here 
was  the  'Church:  but  no— his  soul  recoiled  from  the  degrada 
tion  and  guilt  of  entering  that  holy  calling  from  mercenary 
motives,  merely  as  a  means  of  acquiring  a  livelihood ;  and  he 
would  rather  have  perished,  than  prefer  the  prayer  of  one 
whose  lamentable  case  is  left  on  record— wjp  came  ana 
crouched  for  a  piece  of  silver,  and  a  morsel  of  bread,  *<y™£ 
put  me,  I  pray  thee,  into  one  of  the  priests  offices,  that  I  may 
eat  a  piece  of  bread.  A  personage  of  very  high  distinction  in 
the  ChurchAof  eminent  piety  and  learning- who  was » aware 
of  the  misfortunes  of  Auurey,  and  well  acquainted  with  his 
mire  and  exemplary  character-his  learning  and  acquire- 
ments-his  fitoess ;  for  the  ministerial  office-wrote  to  him, 
offering  him every  .facility  for  taking  orders  and  assuring 
him  thft  he  need  not  wait  long  before  very  suitable  provision 


474  TEN  THOUSAND  A-TEAR. 

would  be  made  for  him.  Though  he  assured  Mr.  Aubrey 
that  he  believed  himself  consulting  the  best  interests,  both 
of  Mr.  Aubrey  and  of  the  Church— the  scruples  of  Mr.  Au- 
brey were  not  to  be  overcome  ;  and  he  wrote  to  the  kind  and 
venerable  prelate,  a  letter  declining  his  offers,  and  assigning 
reasons  which  filled  him  with  profound  respect  for  Mr.  Au- 
brey. Then  literature,  for  which — for  real  substantial 
literature — he  possessed  superior  qualifications,  was  pro- 
verbially precarious.  As  for  teaching— -he  felt  quite  unfit  for 
it ;  he  had  not  the  least  inclination  for  it ;  'twas  a  cheerless 
scene  of  exertion ;  in  which,  as  it  were,  he  felt  his  energies 
perishing  in  the  using.  The  BAR  was  the  profession  to  which 
nis  tastes  and  inclinations,  and,  he  hoped,  his  qualfications, 
pointed  him.  One  of  the  first  things  he  did,  on  reaching 
London,  was  to  apply  for  information  to  one  consummately 
qualified  to  guide  him  in  the  matter.  He  wrote  to  the  At- 
torney-General, soliciting  an  interview  at  his  chambers  upon 
the  subject  of  entering  the  profession;  and  received  an  im- 
mediate answer,  appointing  ten  o'clock  on  Saturday,  on  which 
day  the  Attorney-General  expected  to  be  free  from  public 
engagements.  Precisely  at  tnat  hour,  Mr.  Aubrey  entered 
the  chambers  of  that  distinguished  person,  whose  arrival  he 
anticipated.  Poor  Aubrey  felt  a  little  nervous  and  depressed 
as  the  fussy  clerk  showed  him  into  the  room — as  he  fancied, 
and  only  fancied— with  an  air  of  patronizing  civility,  as  if 
aware  of  his  diminished  personal  consequence.  He  stood  for 
a  minute  or  two  very  close  to  Mr.  Aubrey,  with  a  sort  of 
confidence  in  his  manner,  as  he  rubbed  his  hands,  and  ob- 
served on  the  innumerable  engagements  c  E  the  Attorney- 
General,  which  slightly — very  slightly— ^displeased  Mr.  Au- 
brey, suggesting  the  idea  of  undue  familiarity.  He  answered 
the  voluble  clerk  therefore  courteously,  but  with  an  evident 
disinclination  to  prolong  the  conversation,  and  was  quickly 
left  alone.  Poor  Aubrey's  pride  had  taken  the  alarm.  Was 
it  possible  that  the  man  had  been  presuming  to  give  him  a 
hint  not  to  occupy  much  of  the  Attorney-General's  time? 
Was  it  even  possible  that  it  had  been  done  in  consequence  of 
an  intimation  from  the  Attorney-General  himself  ?  Oh,  no—- 
his own  good  sense  came  presently  to  his  assistance,  and 
banished  so  absurd  a  notion.  There  were  three  tables  in  the 
room,  and  each  was  laden  with  briefs,  some  of  them  of  pro- 
digious bulk.  Seven  or  eight  very  recent  ones  were  placed 
on  the  table  opposite  to  which  his  vacant  chair  was  standing ; 
the  very  sight  of  all  this  oppressed  Aubrey  :  how  could  one 
man's  head  manage  so  much  ?  He  was  ruminating  on  such 
matters — and  especially  upon  the  powerful,  versatile,  and 
practised  intellect  which  was  requisite  to  get  through  so 
much,  especially  amidst  all  the  harassing  responsibilities 
and  occupations  of  political  office,  when  the  Attorney-General 
entered.  He  was  a  tall  and  handsome  man,  about  forty-five, 
with  an  extremely  graceful  and  gentleman-like  carriage— a 


TEN  THOUSAND  A-YEAJt.  475 

slight  dash  of  negligence  in  it;  his  manner  fraught  with 
cheerful  composure.  He  looked  quite  a  man  of  the  world  ; 
you  would  have  thought  that  he  could  have  nothing  to  do 
but  lounge  at  his  club,  ride  round  the  Park,  and  saunter  into 
tiie  House  of  Lords  for  an  hour  or  two.  There  was  not  a 


£,,~~*~~  ^.v,  ^i^^i  v^^u,.,,  tviivi  n\jv  v^vjuv^iuuinsi  ins  ICUJ.V  i/iii  nine 
p  clock  at  night !  There  was  a  playful  smile  about  his  mouth  ; 
his  ample  forehead  seemed  unfurrowed  by  a  wrinkle  •  and 
his  bright  penetrating  hazel  eyes  seemed  never  the  worse  for 
wear  with  all  the  tens  of  thousands  of  brief  sheets  on  which 
they  had  travelled  for  the  last  twenty  years. 

"  Ha— Aubrey— I'm  a  few  minutes  behind  time,  I'm  afraid ! 
—How  are  you?"  said  he,  with  a  cheerful  air,  grasping  his 
saddened  visitor  by  the  hand. 

"  Good  morning,  Mr.  Attorney—  Cum  tot  sustineas,  et  tanta 
neffotia,  solus" — commenced  Aubrey,  pointing  to  the  piles  of 
briefs. 

"  Pho,  my  dear  Aubrey  ;  nonsense  !  They've  enough  of 
my  time,  surely,  without  grudging  me  half  an  hour's  conver- 
sation with  a  friend— ah,  ha !  "  They  were  both  quickly  seat- 
ed—and within  a  minute  or  two's  time  the  Attorney-General 
had  got  to  business — the  business  of  the  visit.  Aubrey  per- 
ceived the  rapidity  of  the  movement ;  but  nothing  could  be 
kinder  than  the  manner  of  his  companion,  however  distinct 
and  decisive  his  intimation  that  time  was  very  precious.  He 
approved  entirely  of  Mr.  Aubrey's  coming  to  the  bai,  and 
strongly  recommended  him  not  to  lose  one  day  in  entering 
upon  the  serious  practical  study  of  it;  informing  him  that,  as 
an  university  man,  within  three  years'  time  he  would  be  eli- 
gible to  be  called  to  the  bar.  "  I'll  call  you  myself,  Aubrey, 
if  you  will  allow  me,"  said  he  ;  but  before  that  period  had  ar- 
rived, he  had  taken  his  seat  upon  the  Woolsack  as  Lord  High 
Chancellor  of  England. 

"  Undoubtedly,"  said  he,  amongst  other  things,  when 
pressed  by  Aubrey  about  the  difficulties  he  should  have  to 
encounter,  "  the  acquisition  of  the  technical  knowledge  will 
be  for  some  little  time  rather  troublesome;  but  a  twelve- 
month's steady  study  by  a  man  who  is  in  earnest  and  accus- 
tomed to  work,  will  make  a  vast  inroad  on  it.  Everything 
you  master,  you  see,  helps  to  master  so  much  more.  Three 
years'  serious  application  to  the  law  by  a  man  like  you,  will 
place  you  far  ahead  of  the  bulk  of  men  at  the  bar.  Besides, 
'tis  not  the  study  but  the  practice  of  the  law  that  teaches  law 
most  effectually.  Always  have  an  eye  to  principle,  and  re- 
solve thoroughly  to  understand  the  smallest  details ;  and  it 
will  be  a  wonderful  assistance  in  fixing  them  for  practical 


476  TEN  THOUSAND  A-YEAll. 

read  it  in  the  evenings ;  'tis  full  of  interest  in  every  point  of 
view.  I  read  every  word  of  it,  very  carefully,  soon  after  I  left 
college ;  and,  by  the  way,  I'll  tell  you  another  book,  by  which 
I  did  the  same — the  State  Trials  :  ay,  by  Jove,  Aubrey,  I  read 
every  word  of  them— speeches,  examinations,  cross-examina- 
tion of  witnesses,  reply,  and  summing  up.  That's  where  I 
first  learned  how  to  examine  and  cross-examine  a  witness. 
Consider,  the  counsel  employed  were,  you  know,  generally 
first-rate  men,  and  exerted  themselves,  on  such  occasions,  to 
the  utmost.  And  there  you  also  learn  a  great  deal  of  consti- 
tutional law.  You  ask  how  I  get  through  so  much  ?  To  be 
sure,  one  has  enough  to  do,  and  I'm  afraid  I  neglect  a  good 
deal ;  but  the  great  secret  is— attention,  and  to  one  thing  at  a 
time.  The  sun  s  rays  scattered  are  comparatively  powerless  ; 
condense  them,  they  are  irresistible ;— but  all  this  you  know 
as  well  as  I  do.  Certainly,  law  is  difficult :  but  its  difficulty 
is  often  greatly  overrated,  especially  by  imperfectly  educated 
and  ill-disciplined,  quick,  sharp  men.  You  will  find  it  a  very 
different  matter.  What  is  wanted  is  a  clear  head,  a  good 
memory,  strong  common  sense,  an  aptitude  for  analysis  and 
arrangement :  before  these  combined,  the  difficulties  of  the 
law  fly  like  the  morning  mist  before  the  sun.  Tact  with  the 
court  and  a  jury  is  acquired  by  practice,  to  a  considerable  ex- 
tent, in  the  absence  even  of  natural  endowments.  And  as  for 
you,  Aubrey— upon  my  honor,  I've  often  listened  with  great 
satisfaction  to  you  in  the  House ;  few  ever  made  clearer  state- 
ments of  facts,  or  reasoned  more  closely  and  cogently  than 
you  did  ;  with  practice  you  would  have  become  a  formidable 
debater.  In  your  new  profession  you  will  find  facts  become 
quite  different  things ;  flexible,  elastic,  accommodating— you 
may  do  anything  with  them — twist,  and  turn,  and  combine  ; 
ha !  ha !  Aubrey  !  "  [Here  the  Attorney-General  laughed  in 
the  plenitude  of  his  own  conscious  power.]  "  In  a  word,  Au- 
brey, if  you  determine  to  get  on  at  the  bar,  you  will ;  and  if 
you  can  but  get  a  bit  of  a  start  at  beginning ;  now,  for  in- 
stance, there's  Runningtons'  house— one  of  the  very  first  in 
London— why  if  they  would  push  you— your  fortune's  made. 
But  you  must  make  up  your  mind  to  wait  a  little :  you  can't 
1  get  into  a  great  business  by  a  hop,  step,  and  a  jump,  believe 
me.  Certainly  Jhave  no  cause  to  be  dissatisfied ;  I've  done 
pretty  well ;  but  I  can  tell  you  that  eight  years  passed  over 
me  before  I  earned  enough  a-year  to  pay  my  laundress !  With 
me,  accident  supplied  the  place  of  connection  :  but  only  sup- 
pose how  I  must  have  worked  in  the  meantime  to  be  able  to 
do  business  when  it  came  to  me  !  I  know  it's  said  that  I  was  al- 


ways an  idle  man ;  but  people  were  a  good  deal  mistaken 
about  that  matter,  I  can  promise  them !  W hat  idiots,  indeed, 
to  suppose  such  a  thing !  Why,  my  very  first  start  lifted  me 
into  a  business  of  a  thousand  a-year ;  and  in  the  name  of 
common  sense,  how  could  I  have  got  through  it,  if  I  hadn't 
worked  beforehand?  Bah!  Xow,  if  Runningtons'  will  stand 


TEN  THOUSAND  A-YEAE.  477 

by  you,  I'll  guarantee  your  making-  £500  your  first  year !  and 
it  they  won't,  why,  don't  despair,  you'll  have  to  wait  a  little 
longer ;  but  it  will  come  at  last,  depend  on  it,  if  you  continue 
on  the  look-out !  Besides,  you  can  help  me  a  little  bit,  eh  ? 
It  will  be  a  sort  of  introduction,  you  know ;  but  we've  time 
enough  to  see  about  that.  I  recommend  you  to  get  at  once 
into  the  chambers  of  some  hard  working  man,  with  a  good 
deal  of  general  business,  particularly  Pleading— let  me  see  " 
—Here  the  Attorney-General  paused  and  stroked  his  chin  for 
a  moment  or  two  in  a  musing  manner,  "  Ah,  yes,  there's 
WEASEL,  the  very  man  for  your  purpose.  He's  a  good  plead- 
er, and  a  neat  draftsman ;  gets  through  his  work  very  cleanly 
—ah !  Weasel's  a  clear-headed  pains-taking  man— all  for  law'; 
and  he's  got  a  good  deal  of  it.  He's  not  a  very  polished  per- 
son, Weasel,  ha !  ha  !  but  he's  an  honorable,  right-minded 
man— shall  I  introduce  you  ?  Well,  by  and  by,  I'll  walk  over 
with  you.  As  to  books  ?  oh !  why — I  suppose  you've  looked 
into  Blackstone  ?  He's  a  fine  fellow,  Blackstone,  arid  deserves 
all  that  has  been  said  in  his  praise.  Many  think  that  he's  only 
to  be  glanced  at,  at  the  beginning  of  their  studies ;  never  be- 
lieve it !  He's  good  to  the  end  of  the  chapter !  I've  a  pro- 
found respect  for  Blackstone ;  it's  the  only  book  I've  read 
four  or  five  times  through— ay,  from  cover  to  cover ;  he  makes 
law  lovely!  Stick  to  Blackstone  by  all  means !  Reeves— oh! 
I  mentioned  him,  you  know.  Then  I  should  go,  I  think,  to 
Coke  on  Littleton  ;  but  we  shall  have  several  opportunities 
of  talking  over  these  matters.  I  really  believe,  Aubrey,  that 
you  are  doing  a  very  wise  thing  in  coming  to  the  bar.  _  If 
you've  health,  and  the  average  opportunities,  (though  I  think 
you  will  have  more)  I'll  undertake  to  say  that  in  a  few  years' 
time  you  will  realize  an  income— which  maybe  a  great  one— 
but  which  (whatever  it  may  be)  you'll  earn,  as  you  did  not 
the  one  you've  lost ;  and  yoii'll  enjoy  it,  Aubrey,  ten  thousand 
times  more !  All  that  I  can  do  for  you,  in  every  way,  I  will 
—command  me !  By  the  way,"  he  added,  assuming  a  some- 
what anxious  expression  of  countenanee,  and  a  manner  very 
different  from  the  free,  buoyant,  off-hand  manner  in  which, 
for  the  last  twenty  minutes,  he  had  been  speaking,  (Aubrey 
feeling  all  the  while  the  easy  commanding  power  and  sim- 
plicity of  the  splendid  intellect  with  which  he  was  commun- 
ing,) "I'm  almost  afraid  to  ask;  but  how  do  you  come  on, 
about  the Mesne  Profits?" 

"  I  have  heard  nothing  whatever  about  them,  as  yet,  re- 
plied Aubrey,  sighing ;  his  face  suddenly  overshadowed  with 
gloom.  A  moment's  pause  ensued;  which  was  interrupted 
by  the  Attorney-General  saying,  in  a  very  earnest  and  feel- 
ing manner,  "  1  hope  to  God  you'll  be  able  to  get  some  favor- 
able  arrangement  made!  You've  not  seen  anything  of  Mr. 
Titmouse's  attorneys,  I  suppose?" 

"  Oh,  no !  nor  heard  anything  from  them. 

"  I've  had  very  little  to  do  with  them :  Quirk,  Gammon, 


478  TEN  THOUSAND  A-YEAR. 

and  Snap — these  are  the  people,  eh?"  Mr.  Aubrey  nodded 
"  Quirk  is  a  stubborn  wooden-headed  fellow— an  old  hedge- 
hog !  Egad !  that  man's  compounded jnore  felonies,  the  old 
scamp,  than  any  man  in  England  I  I  should  like  to  have 
him  in  the  witness-box  for  a  couple  of  hours,  or  so !  I  think 
I'd  tickle  him  a  little,"  said  -the  Attorney-General,  with  a 
bitter  smile.  "  They  say  he's  a  confidential  adviser  to  a  sort 
of  Thieves'  Association.  But  there's  Gammon :  I've  had 
several  things  to  do  with  him.  He  is  a  superior  man,  that 
Gammon;  a  very  superior  man.  A  keen  dog!  I  recollect 
him  being  principal  witness  in  a  cause  when  I  was  for  the 

flaintiff ;  and  he  completely  baffled  Subtle— ah,  ha,  how  well 
recollect  it!— Subtle  lost  his  temper  at  last,  because  he 
couldn't  make  Gammon  lose  his !  An,  how  cleverly  the  fel- 
low twisted  and  turned  with  Subtle  for  nearly  an  hour !  ah, 
ha, — Subtle  looked  so  chagrined ! — Have  you  seen  Mr.  Gam- 
mon?" 

"  Xo,  I've  had  no  occasion." 

"He  has  a  pleasing,  gentlemanlike  appearance;  rather  a 
striking  face.  JUs  the  man  you'll  have  to  deal  with  in  any 
negotiations  on  the  subject  I  named.  You  must  mind  what 
you're  about  with  him.  You  mustn't  think  me  intrusive, 
Aubrey,  but,  have  they  sent  in  their  bill  yet?  " 

Mr.  Aubrey  involuntarily  shuddered,  as  he  answered  in 
the  negative. 

"  I'd  give  a  trifle  to  know  how  the  plague  such  people  ever 
came  to  be  concerned  in  such  a  case.  'Tis  quite  out  of  their 
way— which  is  in  the  criminal  line  of  business !— Thej'll 
make  their  client  pay  for  it  through  the  nose,  I  warrant  him ! 
By  the  way,  what  an  inconceivably  ridiculous  little  ass  that 
Titmouse  is— I  saw  him  in  court  at  York.  If  he'd  only  go 
on  the  stage,  and  act  naturally,  he'd  make  his  fortune  as  a 
fool!" — Mr.  Aubrey  faintly  smiled  at  this  sally;  but  the 
topics  which  the  Attorney-General  had  just  before  touched 
upon,  had  not  a  little  oppressed  his  spirits. 

"  As  this  is  comparatively  an  idle  day  with  me,"  said  the 
Attorney-General,  "  and  I've  got  ten  minutes  more  at  your 
service— suppose  I  go  with  you  at  once— nothing  like  the 
present  moment— to  Mr.  Weasel's  ?  " 

"  I  am  greatly  obliged  to  you,"  replied  Aubrey — and  both 
rose  to  go.  "  Say  I  shall  be  back  in  a  few  minutes,"  said  the 
Attorney-General,  in  answer  to  his  clerk,  who  reminded  him, 
as  he  passed  the  clerk's  door,  that  Mr.  Sergeant  Squelch  and 
3Ir.  Putty  would  be  there  in  a  moment  or  two's  time.  As 
they  crossed  the  court — "  How  do  you  do,  Mr.  Putty?"  said 
the  Attorney-General,  with  lofty  civility,  to  a  grinning  little 
confident  personage  who  met  him,  exclaiming  with  flippant 
familiarity,  "How  do  you  do,  Mr.  Attorney ?— Coming  to 
your  chambers— you  don't  forget  ?— Consultation— eh?" 

"  I  perfectly  recollect  it,  Mr.  Putty.    I  shall  return  pres* 


TEN  THOUSAND  A-YEAR.  479 

ently  "—replied  the  Attorney-General,  somewhat  stiffly,  and 
passed  on,  arm-in-arm,  with  Mr.  Aubrey. 

"Now,  that  forward  little  imp's  name,  Aubrey,  is  PUTTY," 
whispered  the  Attorney-General.  "He  was  a  glazier  by 
trade ;  but  just  as  he  finished  his  apprenticeship,  an  uncle 
left  him  a  few  hundred  pounds,  with  which— would  you  be- 
lieve it?— nothing  would  suit  him  but  decking  himself  in  a 
wig  and  gown,  and  coming  to  the  bar— ah,  ha !— The  follow's 
creeping,  however,  into  a  little  business,  positively  !  They 
say  he  has  a  cousin  who  is  one  of  the  officers  to  the  Sheriff 
of  Middlesex,  and  puts  a  good  many  little  things  in  his  way ! 
He's  my  junior  in  a  criminal  information  against  a  news- 
paper, for  charging  his  father-in-law— a  baker,  who  supplies 
some  workhouse  with  bread— with  making  it  of  only  one- 
third  flour,  one-third  rye,  and  the  remainder  sawdust — 
ah,  ha,  ha!— I  dared  hardly  look  at  the  judges  while  I 
moved  the  Rule  Nisi,  for  fear  of  laughing!  This  is  the 
case  in  which  we're  going  to  have  the  consultation  he 
spoke  of— but  here's  Mr.  Weasel's."  They  mounted  a 
narrow  dingy-looking,  well-worn  stair-case  — and  on  the 
first  floor,  beheld  "MR.  WEASEL"  painted  over  the  door. 
On  the  Attorney-General  knocking,  as  soon  as  his  clear 
silvery  voice  was  heard  asking  for  Mr.  Weasel,  and  his 
dignified  figure  had  been  recognized  by  the  clerk,  who  had 
one  pen  in  his  mouth,  and  another  behind  his  ear— that 
humble  functionary  suddenly  bent  himself  almost  double 
three  or  four  times,  and  with  flustered  obsequiousness  assur- 
ed the  great  man  that  Mr.  Weasel  was  quite  at  liberty.  The 
next  moment  the  Attorney-General  and  Mr.  Aubrey  were 
introduced  into  Mr.  Weasel's  room — a  small  dusky  room, 
wretchedly  furnished,  the  walls  lined  with  book-shelves, 
well  filled— and  the  table  at  which  he  was  writing,  and  a 
chair  on  each  side  of  him,  strewed  with  draft  paper,  which 
he  was  covering  at  a  prodigious  rate.  He  was,  in  fact,  draw- 
ing a  "  Declaration  "  in  an  action  for  a  Breach  of  Promise  of 
Marriage;  (taking  a  hasty  pinch  of  fiery  Welsh  snuff  every 
three  minutes ;)  and  his  task  seemed  to  be  rendered  very 
difficult,  by  the  strange  conduct  of  the  defendant— surely 
the  most  fickle  of  mankind— who,  with  an  extraordinary  in- 
consistencv,  not  knowing  his  own  mind  for  a  day  together, 
had  promised  to  marry  Miss  McSquint,  the  heart-broken 
plaintiff,  firstly,  within  a  reasonable  time;  secondly,  on  a 
given  day ;  thirdly,  on  the  defendant's  return  from  the  Con- 
tinent; fourthly,  on  the  death  of  his  father  (both  of  which 
events  were  averred  to  have  taken  place  ;)  fifthly,  when  the 
defendant  should  have  cut  his  wise  teeth  (which  it  was  aver- 
red he  had ;)  and  lastly,  on  "  being  requested  "  by  the  lady- 
which  it  was  averred  she  had  done,  and  in  the  most  precise 
and  positive  manner,  had  been  ready  and  willing,  and  then 
[what  will  the  ladies  say  ?1  "  tendered  and  offered  herself  to 
marry  the  said  defendant,*  who  had  then  wholly  neglected 


480  TEN  THOUSAND  A-YEAE. 

and  refused  to  do  any  such  thing.  One  notable  peculiarity 
of  the  case  was,  that  all  these  promises  had  been  made,  and 
all  these  events  had  transpired  in  one  particular  place— and 
that  rather  an  odd  one,  viz.  in  "  the  parish  of  Saint  Mary  Le 
J3ow,  in  the  ward  of  Cheap,  in  the  City  of  London?"1*  If  you 
had  been  better  acquainted  with  Mr.  Weasel's  associations 
and  niode  of  doing  business,  you  would  have  discovered  that 
in  his  imagination,  almost  all  the  occurrences-  of  life  took  | 
place  at  this  same  spot!  But  to  return — thus  was  Mr. 
Weasel  engaged  when  they  entered.  He  was  a  bachelor, up- 
wards of  forty ;  was  of  a  spare  make,  of  low  stature,  had  a 
thin,  sharp,  sallow  face,  and  short  stilt'  black  hair ;  there  was 
an  appearance  about  the  eyes  as  if  they  were  half-blinded 
with  being  incessantly  directed  to  white  paper;  he  had  a 
furrowed  forehead,  a  small  pursed-up  mouth— one  hardly 
knew  why,  but  really  there  was  something  about  his  look 
that  instantly  suggested  to  you  the  image  of  the  creature 
whose  name  he  bore.  He  was  a  ravenous  lawyer,  darting  at 
the  point  and  pith  of  every  case  he  was  concerned  in,  and 
sticking  to  it — just  as  would  his  blood-thirsty  namesake  at 
the  neck  of  a  rabbit.  In  law  he  lived,  moved  and  had  his 
being.  In  his  dreams  he  was  everlastingly  spinning  out 
pleadings  which  he  never  could  understand,  and  hunting  for 
cases  which  he  could  not  discover.  In  the  daytime,  however, 
he  was  more  successful.  In  fact,  everything  he  saw,  heard, 
or  read  of— wherever  he  was,  whatever  he  was  doing, 
suggested  to  him  questions  of  law  that  might  arise  out  of 
it.  At  his  sister's  wedding  (whither  he  had  not  gone 
without  reluctance)he  got  into  a  wrangle  with  the  bridegroom, 
on  a  question  started  by  himself,  whether  an  infant  wrts 
liable  for  goods  supplied  to  his  wife  before  marriage  ;  at  his 
grandmother's  funeral  he  got  into  an  intricate  discussion 
with  a  puzzled  proctor  about  bona  notabilia,  with  reference 
to  a  pair  of  horn  spectacles,  which  the  venerable  deceased 
had  left  behind  her  in  Scotland,  and  a  poodle  in  the  Isle  of 
Man ;  and  at  church,  the  reading  of  the  parable  of  the  Unjust 
Steward,  set  his  devout,  ingenious,  and  fertile  mind  at  work 
for  the  remainder  of  the  service,  as  to  the  modes  of  stating 
the  case  now-a-days  against  the  offender,  and  whether  it 
would  be  more  advisable  to  proceed  civilly  or  criminally ; 
and  if  the  former,  at  law  or  in  equity.  He  was  a  hard-headed 
man  ;  very  clear  and  acute,  and  accurate  in  his  legal  know- 
ledge :  every  other  sort  of  knowledge  he  despised,  if,  indeed, 
he  had  more  than  the  faintest  hearsay  knowledge  of  its  exist- 
ence. He  was  a  Cambridge  man  ;  and  there  had  read  nothing 
but  mathematics,  in  which  he  had  made  a  decent  figure. 
As  soon  as  he  had  taken  his  degree,  he  migrated  to  the  Tem- 

*  It  may  be  as  well  to  apprise  the  reader  that  this  strange  mode  of 
pleading  has  been  lately  superseded  by  one  more  reasonable  and  intellig- 
ible, 


TEN  THOUSAND  A-YEAR.  481 

pie,  where  he  had  ever  since  continued  engaged  in  the  study, 
and  then  the  successful  practice,  of  the  law,  as  a  special  plead- 
er under  the  bar.  He  had  a  very  large  business,  which  he 
got  through  ably  and  rapidly.  He  scarcely  ever  went  into 
S9ciety  ;  early  want  of  opportunity  for  doing  so,  had  at  length 
given  him  a  want  of  inclination  for  it—  to  say  nothing  of  nis 
want  of  time.  When,  as  was  seldom  the  case,  he  ventured 
out  for  a  walk,  he  went,  muttering  to  himself,  at  a  postman's 
pace,  to  get  the  greatest  quantity  of  exercise,  in  the  smallest 
space  of  time.  He  was  not  a  bad-tempered  man,  but  had  be- 
come nervous,  fidgety,  and  irritable.  His  tone  of  voice  was 
feeble,  his  utterance  hesitating,  his  manner  hurried.  What 
a  laughable  contrast  between  mm  and  his  visitor!  The  At- 
torney-General coming  to  Mr.  Weasel's  chambers,  suggested 
the  idea  of  a  magnificent  mastiff  suddenly  poking  his  head 
into  the  little  kennel  of  a  querulous  pug-dog  ;  and  I  suppose 
Mr.  Aubrey  might  be  likened  to  a  greyhound,  accompanying 
the  aforesaid  mastiff  !  On  seeing  his  visitors,  Mr.  Weasel 
instantly  got  up,  with  a  blush  of  surprise,  and  a  little  hurry 
and  embarrassment  of  manner.  His  clerk  put  out  a  couple 
of  chairs,  and  down  they  sat.  The  Attorney-General  came 
to  the  point  in  about  half  a  minute,  and  the  matter  was  very 
quickly  settled  ;  it  being  arranged  that  within  a  day  or  two's 
time,  as  soon  as  the  forms  necessary  for  admitting  Mr.  Au- 
brey to  an  Inn  of  Court  should  have  been  completed,  he 
should  commence  his  attendance  at  Mr.  Weasel's,  from  ten 
o'clock  till  five,  daily. 

"It's  a  comical  looking  little  animal,  isn't  it!"  quoth  the 
Attorney-General,  with  a  laugh,  as  soon  as  they  had  got  out 


"  Certainly,  I  don't  feel  particularly  prepossessed— 
"Oh,  pho!  He's  the  very  man  for  you—  the  very  man. 
There's  no  nonsense  with  Weasel  ;  you  may  learn  an  infinite 
deal  of  law  from  him,  and  that  is  all  you  want.  He's  a  very 
inoffensive  fellow:  and  I've  no  doubt  you'll  soon  like  his 
chambers  greatly,  if  you're  in  earnest  in  studying  the  Law. 
You  go  or  not,  of  course,  as  you  choose  ;  whatever  you  do  is 
perfectly  voluntary  ;  pay  him  his  hundred  guineas,  and  then, 
if  you  like,  you  may  get  many  thousand  pounds'  worth  out 
of  him  in  the  twelvemonth  .  Now,  I  must  bid  you  good  morn- 
ing—I've really  not  another  moment  to  spare.  God  bless 
yoil,  my  dear  Aubrey  ;  and,"  he  added,  with  great  kindness, 
and  a  very  pointed  manner,  "  whenever  you  may  think  it 
worth  your  while  to  talk  over  your  affairs  with  me,  come 
without  notice  or  ceremony—  wherever  I  may  be,  I  shall  be 
delighted  to  see  you!"  Then  they  parted.  Mr.  Aubrey 
was  not  aware  of  a  certain  stroke  of  delicacy  and  generosity 
on  the  part  of  the  Attorney-General  ;  viz.  that  immediately 
on  the  Rule  being  discharged,  he  had  sent  for  Mr.  Kunning- 
ton,  and  insisted  on  returning  every  sixpence  of  his  tees— 
upwards  of  six  hundred  guineas—  desiring  that  Mr.  Aubrey 


482  TEN  THOUSAND  A-YEAR. 

should  not  be  made  acquainted  with  it,  if  by  any  meana 
Messrs.  Runnington  could  conceal  it  from  him ! 

A  little  fatigued  and  harassed  by  several  important  mat- 
ters, which  kept  him  engaged  till  a  late  hour  in  the  after- 
noon, he  reached  Vivian  Street  in  a  depressed  and  despond- 
ing mood.  Just  as  he  turned  the  corner,  he  beheld,  at  about 
twenty  yards'  distance,  Mrs.  Aubrey  and  Miss  Aubrey  slow- 
ly walking  homeward,  on  their  return  from  the  Park.  Mrs. 
Aubrey  held  Charles  by  the  hand,  who  was  dancing  and  frisk- 
ing wildly  about,  and  Miss  Aubrey's  beautiful  little  Cato  she 
was  leading  along  by  a  slender  chain.  They  were  in  half- 
mourning  ;  there  was  such  an  air  of  elegant  simplicity  about 
them— their  figures,  their  carriage,  so  easy  and  graceful! 
Aubrey,  as  he  neared  them,  gazed  at  them  with  mingled  feel- 
ings of  pride  and  tenderness. 

"  Oh,  my  papa !  my  papa ! "  suddenly  exclaimed  Charles, 
who,  happening  to  turn  round,  had  caught  sight  of  his  father, 
and  ran  eagerly  down  to  him  :  with  what  a  thrill  of  love  did 
he  take  in  his  arms  the  beautiful  breathless  boy,  and  how 
his  heart  yearned  towards  his  wife  and  sister,  as  they  also 
turned  quickly  round  to  meet  him,  after  a  long  day's  ab- 
sence !  How  inexpressibly  dear  were  they  to  him — how,  that 
day,  he  enjoyed  their  quiet  little  dinner-table— the  romp 
with  his  children  afterwards— and  a  long  evening  of  eager 
and  interesting  conversation,  after  the  little  ones  had  gone 
to  bed,  Mrs.  Aubrey  and  Kate  busy  the  while  with  some 
slight  matter  of  needle-work!  They  had  received  several 
letters  from  Yorkshire,  which  they  read  to  him.  One  was 
from  poor  Dr.  Tatham,  who,  though  he  concealed  a  good  deal 
that  would  have  occasioned  needless  pain,  yet  gave  them  a 
melancholy  notion  of  the  altered  state  of  things  at  the  Hall. 
Though  it  was  rather  late  before  they  retired  to  rest  on  the 
evening  of  the  ensuing  Sunday,  Mr.  Aubrey  was  to  be  found 
seated  in  his  study  by  half-past  four  on  Monday  morning, 
perusing,  with  profound  attention,  stimulated  by  the  strong 
observation  of  the  Attorney-General,  the  second  volume  of 
Blackstone's  Commentaries— a  work  with  which  he  had  al- 
ready a  very  tolerable  familiarity.  'Twas  really  a  thing  to 
be  proud  of,  that  Mr.  Aubrey,  with  so  many  absorbing  anxie- 
ties, such  distracting  apprehensions  concerning  the  future, 
could  command  his  attention  in  the  way  he  did.  To  be  sure, 
he  felt  that  it  was  plainly  life-and-death  work  with  him  ;* but 
he  might  have  derived  great  encouragement  from  perceiving 
himself  possessed  of  that  faculty  of  concentrating  the  atten- 
tion, which  the  Attorney-General  had  spoken  of  as  so  essen- 
tial an  attribute  of  a  lawyer.  The  way  in  which  he  parcelled 
out  his  time  was  this :  From  the  time  that  he  entered  his 
study  till  breakfast-time,  he  resolved  to  read  law — from  ten 
o'clock  till  four  or  five,  was  to  be  spent  at  Mr.  Weasel's  cham- 
bers— and  the  evenings  were  to  be  devoted  to  the  society  of 
his  children,  his  wife,  and  sister,  and  also  to  certain  occa- 


TEN  THOUSAND  A-TEAR.  483 

sional  literary  efforts,  from  which  he  hoped  to  derive  some 
little  increase  to  his  means.    This  was  severe  work ;  but  it 
was  probably  the  most  fortunate  and  salutary  thing  in  the 
world  for  Aubrey,  that  his  energies  should  be  thus  occupied, 
and  his  mind  kept  from  the  corroding  effects  of  constant  re- 
flection upon  his  misfortunes,  and  dismal  apprehensions  con- 
cerning the  future.    After  he  had  spent  a  few  days  in  Mr 
Weasel's  chambers,  a  good  deal  of  his  prejudice  against  that 
gentleman  began  to  wear  off.    Mr.  Aubrey  found  him  all 
that  the  Attorney-General  had  described  him  as  being— a 
very  acute  and  able  lawyer,  with  a  constant  current  of  im- 
portant, varied,  and  instructive  business  running  through 
his  chambers,  and  every  disposition  to  render  his  utmost  as- 
sistance to  Mr.  Aubrey,  whom  he  quickly  found  out  to  be  a 
man  of  very  superior   intellect,  and  most  seriously  bent 
upon  acquiring  a  knowledge  of  the  profession.    Mr.  Weasel 
was  not  blessed  with  the  power  of  formally  communicat- 
ing elementary  knowledge;  Mr.  Aubrey  had,   as  it  were, 
to  extract  from    him    what   he    wanted,   with    something 
like   a   painful    effort.      The    advantage    of   his    position 
were  the  innumerable  practical  hints  and  suggestions  as  to 
the  mode  of  dealing  with  miscellaneous  business,  which  he 
derived  from  a  watchful  attention  to  whatever  passed  in 
chambers — to  the  mode  in  which  Weasel  hunted  up  and  ap- 
plied his  law,  and  reduced  the  facts  involved  in  litigation  into 
legal  shape  and  language,  in  the  process  of  pleading.     The 
penetrating  eye  of  Mr.  Aubrey,  thus  closely  fixed  on  every- 
thing that  came  under  his  notice,  quickly  began  to  discover 
and  appreciate  the  good  sense,  the  practical  utility  of  most 
of  the  positive  rules  of  law  which  he  saw  in  operation ;   and 
at  the  end  of  a  fortnight  or  three  weeks,  he  began  to  feel  in- 
terest in  the  study  upon  which  he  had  so  vigorously  entered, 
and  in  which  he  felt  himself  making  real  progress.     Mr. 
Weasel,  during  even  that  time,  perceived  the  prodigious 
superiority  of  Mr.  Aubrey  over  another  pupil,  who  had  near- 
ly completed  his  second  year  in  Mr.  Weasel's  chambers, 
after  a  twelvemonth  spent  in  a  conveyancer's  ;  not,  of  course, 
in  respect  of  legal  knowlege,  but  of  intellectual  powfcr  and 
aptitude  for  business.— Mr.  Aubrey  would  return  to  Vivian 
Street  about  six  o'clock  each  day,  a  little  fatigued  with  a  very 
long  day's  work,  (for  he  was  never  later  than  five  o'clock  in 
entering  his  study  in  the  morning ;)  but  quickly  cheered  and 
refreshed  by  the  sight  of  the  fond  and  lovely  beings  whom 
he  there  rejoined,  and  who  had  been  counting  the  very  min- 
utes till  he  returned.    Every  day  knit  that  little  family  to- 
gether, if  possible,  in  stronger  bonds  of  love ;  for  they  clung 
to  each  other  with  a  feeling  of  having  been  thrust  out  of  the 
great  gay  world  together,  and  sent,  as  it  were,  upon  a  pil- 
grimage afar,  amidst  scenes  of  increasing  gloom,  difficulty, 
and  danger.    Every  day  that  bore  them  further  from  their 
expulsion  from  Yatton,  as  it  were,  mellowed  their  recollec- 


484  TEN  THOUSAND  A-YEAR. 

tions  of  past  scenes,  and  poured  upon  their  wounded  feelings 
the  soothing  balm  of  pious  resignation ;  and  sometimes,  also, 
faint  and  trembling  beams  of  hope  concerning  the  future, 
would  steal  across  the  gloomy  chambers  of  their  hearts. 
Thank  God,  the  view  of  the  past  presented  to  them  no  occa- 
sion for  shame,  for  remorse,  for  self-condemnation!  They 
trusted-  that,  in  their  day  of  wealth  and  distinction,  they 
had  not  been  found  wanting  in  the  discharge  of  the  duties 
imposed  upon  them.  Therefore  they  had  consolation  from  a 
view  of  the  past.  But  the  FUTURE— indeed — 

"Shadows,  clouds,  and  darkness  rested  on  it." 

Their  hearts  involuntarily  fluttered  and  shrank  within  them, 
when  they  gazed  upon  the  threatening  gloom  that  hung  over 
it.  Their  straitened  circumstances — an  honorable  poverty — 
had  been  a  burden  light,  indeed,  to  bear.  They  were  very 
happy  in  one  another's  company ;  their  house,  though  small, 
was  convenient,  and  even  elegantly  comfortable ;  they  had 
health ;  Mr.  Aubrey  had  constant  exercise  for  an  active  and 
vigorous  mind,  in  the  acquisition  of  the  learning  of  a  noble 
profession,  the  practise  of  which  might  possibly  hereafter 
raise  all  of  them  to  even  affluence  and  distinction— at  all 
events,  might  secure  them  the  substantial  comforts  of  life. 
But  Mr.  Aubrey  would  have  moments  of  heaviness  and  trep- 
idation. When  engaged  in  his  little  study,  in  the  profound 
solitude  and  silence  of  the  early  morning,  while  he  was  thus 
straining  his  faculties  to  their  utmost,  on  behalf  of  the 
sweet  innocent  beings — his  wife — his  children — his  sister — 
sleeping  above,  he  would  sometimes  lean  back  in  his  chair, 
with  a  very  deep  sigh,  and  sink  into  a  reverie— oh,  how  sad 
and  painful ! — deepening  occasionally  into  agony ;  but  he 
would  suddenly  arouse  himself,  and  resume  his  studies  with 
a  powerful  effort  at  abstraction — with  additional  intensity  of 
application.  How  could  he  be  otherwise  than  momentarily 
paralyzed,  when  he  surveyed  his  alarming  and  tremendous 
pecuniary  liabilities  ?  Bills  of  costs— Heaven  only  knew  to 
what  amount— due  to  Messrs.  Quirk,  Gammon,  and  Snap :  to 
his  own  attorneys,  Messrs.  Runnington ;  and  to  Mr.  Parkin- 
son: and  then— sickening  and  fearful  object!— the  Mesne 
Profits— what  was  to  become  of  them  all  ?  The  mind  that, 
in  the  presence  of  such  disturbing  forces  as  these,  could  ap- 
ply its  energies  so  successfully  as  did  that  of  Mr.  Aubrey  to 
the  acquisition  of  knowledge,  with  any  degree  of  calmness, 
must  surely  have  been  of  no  common  order,  and  have  under- 
gone no  slight  discipline ;  but,  alas !  alas !  what  could  all 
this  have  availed  him,  unless  he  had  been  vouchsafed  assist- 
ance from  on  high  ?  When  the  waters  were  come  in  unto  his 
soid  ;  when  he  was  sinking  in  deep  mire,  where  there  was  no 
standing ;  when  he  was  come  into  deep  waters,  where  the 
floods  overflowed  him — whither  was  he  to  look  but  to  one 


TEN  THOUSAND  A-TEAE.  485 

quarter,  and  that  ABOVE,  with  earnest,  and  faithful,  and  con- 
stant supplication  to  the  Almighvy  ? 

The  constant  apprehension  of  very  great  evil— suspense- 
is  a  state  almost  as  terrible  and  insupportable,  especially  to 
those  of  lively  susceptibilities,  as  that  produced  by  the  inflic- 
tion of  the  evil.  Every  morning  when  Aubrey  left  home  he 
dreaded  to  think  of  what  might  happen  before  his  return ; 
and  when  he  quitted  the  Temple,  he  felt  a  sinking  of  the 
heart  when  he  thought  of  what  might  have  transpired  in  his 
absence.  In  fact,  they  all  of  them  felt  like  those  whom  the 
ominous  silence  and  repose  of  surrounding  nature— a  porten- 
tous calm  and  gloom  overhead — filled  with  trembling  appre- 
hension of  the  coming  storm.  Their  fears  are  quickened  by 
the  occasional  falling  of  large  spreading  drops  of  rain  through 
the  sultry  sky,  not  a  breath  of  air  stirring.  Upward  is  oft 
turned  the  pale  cheek  and  apprehensive  eye  towards  the 
black  accumulating  clouds,  from  which  may  soon  flame  the 
destructive  lightning— what,  in  such  a  case,  is  there  to  rely 
upon,  but  the  mercy  of  Him  around  whose  throne  are  ckmds 
and  darkness,  and  the  whirlwind  and  tempest  his  ordering  ? 

They  were  sitting  one  morning  at  their  usual  early  and 
simple  breakfast,  and  Mr.  Aubrey  was  reading  aloud,  for  his 
wife  and  sister's  suggestions,  a  second  article  which  he  had 
commenced  overnight,  designed  for  one  of  the  Reviews — 
haying  about  a  fortnight  before  sent  off  his  first  effort,  about 
which,  however,  he  had  as  yet  heard  nothing ;  and  Kate  was 
playfully  patting  his  cheek,  and  telling  him  that,  for  all  he 
might  say  to  the  contrary,  a  particular  expression  was  not  in 
her  opinion,  "  elegant  English  !  " 

"It  ts,  you  pert  puss  of  a  critic,"  insisted  Aubrey,  with  a 
good-natured  laugh;  and  then,  turning  to  Mrs.  Aubrey, 
"  What  do  you  say,  Agnes?  " 

"Oh — why— I  really  like  it  very  much  as  it  is." 

"  I  sha'n't  alter  it,"  said  Aubrey,  laughing. 

"  Then  I'll  alter  it  when  you're  gone,"  quoth  Kate  with  af- 
fected pertness,  and  bringing  her  beautiful  laughing  face  so 
near  his  own,  with  a  kind  of  air  of  defiance,  that  he  kissed 
her  forehead,  and  said  it  should  be  as  she  chose. 

Just  then  a  knock  at  the  door  announced  a  visitor,  who 
proved  to  be  Mr.  Runnington.  Why  it  was,  they  hardly 
knew :  but  they  all  slightly  changed  color.  He  had  called 
so  early,  he  said,  to  ensure  seeing  Mr.  Aubrey  before  he  went 
to  the  Temple !  and  though  he  had  been  shown  into  the 
study,  Mr.  Aubrey  insisted  on  his  joining  the  breakfast 
table. 

"  We've  very  plain  fare  for  you,  however,  said  he  as  Mr. 
Runnington  yielded  to  his  wishes. 

Mr.  Aubrey  perceived,  with  some  uneasiness,  that  the  kind 
and  thoughtful  countenance  of  Mr.  Runnington  wore  rather 
an  anxious  expression.  And  indeed  so  it  was.  When  he 
looked  at  those  who  sat  before  him— lovely,  elegant,  yet  with 


486  TEN  THOUSAND  A- YEAR. 

a  plainly  forced  cheerfulness— reflected  on  the  sufferings 
which  they  had  passed  through,  and  that  which  was  in  store 
for  them — and  for  the  first  bitter  instalment  of  which  he  had 
come  to  prepare  Mr.  Aubrey— could  he  but  feel  very  deep 
sympathy  for  them  ?  As  soon  as  he  had  retired  with  Mr. 
Aubrey  to  the  study,  in  a  low  tone  he  informed  Mr.  Aubrey 
of  his  errand,  which  was  to  apprise  him  that,  the  evening 
before,  Messrs.  Quirk,  Gammon,  and  Snap's  BILL  had  come 
in. 

"  Well,  show  it  me,  if  you  please,"  said  Mr.  Aubrey  calmly, 
extending  his  hand. 

"  My  dear  sir,  why  do  you  suppose  I  have  it  with  me  f  "  in- 
quired Mr.  Runnington  with  a  concerned  air.  "  You  are  not 
accustomed  to  such  matters — God  forbid  you  should !  It  is 
too  bulky  for  me  to  have  brought  with  me,  and  lies  at  our 
office ! " 

"  What  is  the  amount  of  it,  then  ?  "  inquired  Mr.  Aubrey, 
dreading  to  hear  the  answer ;  while  Mr.  Runnington  took 
out  of  his  pocket-book  a  slip  of  paper,  which  he  handed  to 
Mr.  Aubrey,  and  on  which  the  latter  read — '  £3946  14s.  6d.' 
He  gazed  at  it  for  some  moments  in  silence,  and  became  very 
pale.  Mr.  Runnington  could  hardly  bear  to  look  at  him,  and 
think  of  the  two  lovely  women  in  the  adjoining  room,  who 
were  so  fearfully  interested  in  the  intelligence  which  had  so 
dismayed  Mr.  Aubrey. 

"  This  is  a  very— large— amount,"  said  he,  at  length,  with 
forced  calmness. 

"  It  is  a  most  serious  affair,"  replied  Mr.  Runnington  shak- 
ing his  head  and  sighing. 

Then  there  is  yours— and  Mr.  Parkinson's." 

"  Oh,  Mr.  Aubrey — sufficient  for  the  day  is  the  evil  thereof" 

"Will  you  oblige  me  by  saying  what  is  the  probable  amount 
of  your  bill  ?  "  inquired  Mr.  Aubrey,  with  a  calmness  which 
seemed  lent  to  him  by  despair. 

"  Oh  !  I  assure  you  we  have  thought  nothing  at  all  about 
it,  nor  shall  we  for  some  time  to  come,  Mr.  Aubrey.  We 
have  not  the  slightest  intention  of  troubling  ourselves,  or  you, 
with  the  matter  till  you  may  be  in  a  position  to  attend  to  it 
without  serious  inconvenience." 

"  But  do  favor  me  with  something  like  a  notion,"  pressed 
the  unhappy  Aubrey. 

"  Why— perhaps  1  am  hardly  doing  right  in  mentioning  it ; 
but  whenever  our  bill  is  sent  in.  it  will  be  less  by  some  six 
hundred  and  fifty  pounds,  by  the  noble  generosity  of  the 
Attorney-General,  who  has  returned  all  his  fees 

"Returned  all  his  fees!"  echoed  Mr.  Aubrey  starting, 
while  the  color  rushed  into  his  cheek,  and  the  expression  of 
his  countenance  was  of  pride  struggling  with  astonishment, 
and  gratitude,  and  admiration.  He  exquisitely  appreciated 
the  conduct  of  his  distinguished  friend  j  and  at  the  same 


TEN  THOUSAND  A-YEAE.  487 

time  felt  a  totally  new  and  very  painful  sense  of  pecuniary 
obligation. 

"  1  feel,  Mr.  Aubrey,  that  I  have  broken  my  promise  to  the 
Attorney-General,  who  extracted  from  me  a  solemn  pledge, 
to  endeavor  so  to  manage  the  matter  as  that  you  should  never 
know  it.  What  is  it,  after  all— noble  as  it  is— to  the  Attor- 
ney-General, with  his  £12,000  or  £15,000  a-year?" 

"  Oh— do  not  talk  so,  Mr  Runnington  ;  1  am  overpowered, 
oppressed.  Never  in  all  my  life  have  I  experienced  feelings 
like  those  with  which  I  am  now  agitated  ! "  He  rose,  and 
stood  opposite  the  window  for  a  few  minutes— neither  of  them 
speaking.  Then  he  returned  to  his  seat. 

"  How  much  does  that  leave  me  your  debtor?" 

"  Why— really  it  is  hard  to  say,  unprepared— I  should  inu 
agine  that  our  account  is  reduced  to  some  £1500  or  £1600— 
about  which " 

"  Then  there  is  Mr.  Parkinson's  ,"  said  Aubrey  in  a  low 
tone,  but  with  a  desperate  air ;  presently  adding—"  Here  are 
some  £6000  or  £7000  to  start  with ;  and  then  we  come  to  the 
mesne  profits — gracious,  gracious  God ! "  he  suddenly  added 
with  a  visible  shudder.  He  folded  his  arms  convulsively, 
and  gazed,  for  a  second  or  two  at  Mr.  Runnington,  with  an 
eye  whose  expression  was  overpowering.  In  nis  face  Mr. 
Runnington  beheld  no  longer  the  mild  and  melancholy  ex- 
pression to  which  he  had  been  accustomed,  but  a  sternness 
and  power  were  apparent  in  his  features,  which  Mr.  Running- 
ton  had  not  imagined  them  capable  of  exhibiting.  They  told 
of  a  strong  soul  thoroughly  roused,  and  excited,  and  in  agony. 
At  that  moment  a  knocking  was  heard  at  the  door,  as  of  very 
little  fingers.  "  Gome  in ! "  exclaimed  Mr.  Aubrey,  with  un- 
unsual  quickness  and  sternenss.  The  door  was  gently  opened, 
and  Charles'  little  face  peeped  into  the  room  timidly,  quite 
startled  by  the  tone  in  which  he  had  been  addressed.  "  Come 
in,  my  child ! "  said  Mr.  Aubrey,  rather  tremulously,  when 
he  saw  that  it  was  his  son,  and  observed  the  apprehensive- 
ness  overspreading  his  little  features.  Charles  immediately 
advanced,  with  a  serious  submissive  air,  saying — "  This 
letter  is  just  come — Mamma  sent  me  with  it,  dear  papa — 

"  Give  it  me,  Charles,"  said  Mr.  Aubrey,  extending  his  hand 
for  it,  while  with  the  other  he  gently  placed  the  cnild  upon 
his  lap,  and  kissed  him.  "  I'm  not  angry  with  you,  Charles," 
said  he  tenderly. 

"  I've  not  been  naughty,  you  know,  dear  papa !  "  said  he 
with  innocent  surprise. 

"  No,  no,  my  little  love."  The  ruined  FATHER  could  say  no 
more ;  but  putting  aside  the  child's  flowing  curly  locks  from 
his  temples,  as  it  were  mechanically,  he  gazed  on  his  little 
face  for  a  moment,  and  then  folded  him  in  nis  arms  with  un- 
speakable tenderness.  Mr.  Runnington  rose,  and  stood  for 
some  moments  gazing  through  the  window,  unwilling  that 
his  own  emotion  should  be  observed.  When  Mr.  Aubrey 


488  TEN  THOUSAND  A-YEAE. 

opened  the  letter,  it  proved  to  be  from  the  publisher  of  the 
Review  to  which  he  had  sent  his  article,  enclosing  a  check 
for  forty  guineas,  expressing  an  earnest  desire  that  he  would 
continue  his  contributions,  and  assuring  him  that  the  editor 
considered  the  article  "  in  every  way  admirable."  As  soon  as 
he  had  glanced  over  the  letter — "  You  little  messenger  of  hope 
and  mercy  ! "  he  thought,  again  kissing  his  son,  who  sat  pas- 
sively gazing  at  the  agitated  countenance  of  his  FATHER—"  I 
cannot,  I  will  not  despair !  You  have  brought  me  as  it  were, 
a  ray  of  light  from  heaven,  piercing  the  fearful  gloom  of  my 
situation  :  'tis  a  token,  surely,  that  I  am  not  forgotten  :  I  feel 
as  though  an  angel,  momentarily  brightening  the  night  of  sor- 
row, had  come  and  whispered  in  my  ear — 'COURAGE  ! ' '  His 
features  began  to  resume  their  natural  serenity  of  expres- 
sion. "  Take  it  in  to  your  mamma,"  said  he,  kissing  little 
Charles,  and  despatching  him  with  the  letter.  Shortly  after- 
wards, as  soon  as  he  had  recovered  the  command  of  his  man- 
ner sufficiently  to  avoid  occasioning  uneasiness  to  Mrs.  and 
Miss  Aubrey,  he  proposed  to  Mr.  Runnington  that  they 
should  walk  towards  the  Temple  ;  and  bidding  adieu  to  those 
whom,  he  left  behind  him,  without  giving  them  an  opportu- 
nity to  ask  him  as  to  the  nature  of  Mr.  Kunnington's  errand, 
but  leaving  them  in  high  spirits  at  the  letter  which  he  had 
sent  in  to  them,  he  quitted  the  house  arm-in-arm  with  Mr. 
Runnington.  I  am  persuaded  that  if  that  gentleman  had  had 
no  one  to  consult,  ne  would  have  relieved  Mr.  Aubrey  alto- 
gether from  liability  to  him  :  but  he  had  four  partners ; 
their  own  pecuniary  outlay  had  been  considerable ;  and, 
therefore,  the  thing  was  really  out  of  the  question.  As  they 
walked  along,  in  the  course  of  much  anxious  conversation, 
Mr.  Runnington  told  Mr.  Aubrey  that  he  considered  Messrs. 
Quirk,  Gammon,  and  Snap's  bill  to  be  extortionate  ;  and  that 
it  might,  on  taxation — a  process  which  he  explained  to  Mr. 
Aubrey— be  reduced,  probably,  by  at  least  one  half.  But  he 
also  reminded  Mr.  Aubrey  of  the  power  which  they  held  in 
their  hands,  in  respect  of  the  mesne  profits ;  and  intimated 
his  opinion,  that  in  all  probability  they  had  made  out  their 
bill  with  an  eye  to  such  considerations— namely,  that  it  should 
be  discharged  without  rigorous  scrutiny  into  its  constituent 
items,  before  they  would  listen  to  any  terms  whatever  for 
the  payment  of  the  mesne  profits ;  and  that  Mr.  Aubrey's 
position,  with  respect  to  Messrs,  Quirk,  Gammon,  and  Snap, 
was  one  which  required  the  greatest  possible  deliberation 
and  circumspection  on  his  part,  especially  in  the  matter  of 
the  bill  just  delivered  in  by  them. 

"  I  see !  The  whole,"  said  Mr.  Aubrey,  "  comes  to  this  :  they 
will  relieve  me  from  liability  to  Mr.  Titmouse,  for  as  much  of 
what  may  be  due  to  him,  as  they  can  divert  into  their  own 
pockets ! " 

"  That  certainly  seems  very  much  like  it,"  replied  Mr. 
Ruimington,  shrugging  his  shoulders  ;  but  you  will  leave  all 


TEN  THOUSAND  A-YEAIt.  489 

such  considerati9ns  and  matters  to  us ;  and  rely  on  out 
honor  and  our  discretion.  At  what  may  appear  to  us  the 
exact  moment  for  doing  so  with  effect,  depend  upon  our  most 
cautious  interference.  We  know,  Mr.  Aubrey,  the  kind  of 
people  we  have  to  deal  with.  Mr.  Titmouse  is  very  likelvto 
be  merely  a  puppet  in  their  hands— at  least  in  those  of  Mr. 
Gammon,  who  is  a  very  long-headed  man,  and  with  whom,  I 
have  no  doubt,  our  negotiations  will  have  to  be  carried  on." 

"  That  is  just  what  the  Attorney-General  said— and  he  in- 
vited  me,  more9ver,  to  converse  with  him.  whenever  I  might 
consider  that  his  advice  would  be  useful. 

"  Could  you  have  a  better  adviser  ?  He  has  a  most  pene- 
trating sagacity,  long  exercised— in  short,  his  qualifications 
are  consummate ;  and  I  should  not  hesitate  about  consulting 
him  whenever  we  feel  at  a  loss." 

"  Why  should  I  disguise  anything  from  you,  Mr,  Running- 
ton  ?  "—said  Aubrey—"  you  ought  to  know  the  exact  state  of 
my  affairs.  I  have  a  little  family  plate,  which  I  could  not 
bear  to  part  with ;  my  books ;  and  the  remnants  of  the  furni- 
ture at  Yatton,  which  I  have  saved  in  order  to  furnish  our  pres- 
ent residence.  Besides  this,  the  outside  of  all  that  I  am  pos- 
sessed of — and  1  have  no  expectations,  nor  has  my  wife  nor  my 
poor  sister,  from  any  quarter— is  a  sum  of  about  £3000  in  the 
funds,  and  £423  at  my  banker's.  Those  are  my  circumstan- 
ces ;  they  appal  me  merely  in  stating  them :— Why,  I  owe 
double  the  sum  I  have  named,  for  lawyers'  bills  only.  I  have 
not  enough,  without  parting  with  my  books  and  plate,  to  dis- 
charge even  Messrs.  Quirk,  Gammon,  and  Snap's  bill ! " 

"  It  would  be  cruel  and  absurd  in  me  not  to  express  at  once, 
Mr.  Aubrey,  my  conviction  that  your  .situation  is  fearfully 
critical ;  and  that  your  sole  hope  is  in  the  treatment  which, 
may  be  expected  from  Messrs.  Quirk,  Gammon  and  Snap,  and 
their  client,  Mr.  Titmouse.  Serious  as  are,  at  present,  your 
other  liabilities — to  that  one,  they  are  but  as  a  bucket  of  water 
to  the  Thames.  As  we  are  talking  Mr.  Aubrey,  in  this  can- 
did and  unrestrained  manner,  I  will  tell  you  my  chief  source 
of  apprehension  on  your  account,  with  reference  to  Messrs. 
Quirk,  Gammon,  and  Snap :  namely,  that  they  may  possibly 
speculate  on  your  being  able,  if  placed  in  real  peril,  to  call 
around  you,  in  your  extremity,  a  host  of  wealthy  and  power- 
ful friends— as  security,  or  otherwise — 

"  They  will  find  themselves,  then,  utterly  mistaken.  If 
they  and  their  client  are  really  capable  ot  such  shocking 
brutality— such  wanton  oppression— let  them  do  their  worst : 
I  am  resigned.  Providence  will  find  out  a  shelter  for  my 
wife  and  children,  and  my  dear,  devoted,  high-spirited  sister ; 
and  as  for  myself,  rather  than  satiate  the  rapacity  of  such 
wretches,  by  plundering  good-natured  and  generous  friends, 
I  will  end  my  days  in  prison." 

Mr.  Aubrey  was  evidently  not  a  little  excited  while  he  said 
this ;  but  there  was  that  in  his  tone  of  voice,  and  in  his  eye, 


490  TEN  THOUSAND  A-YEATi. 

which  told  Mr.  Runnington  that  lie  meant  what  he  said ;  and 
that,  as  soon  as  it  should  have  come  to  the  point  of  oppres- 
sion and  injustice,  no  man  could  resist  more  powerfully,  or 
endure  with  a  more  dignified  and  inflexible  resolution.  Bub 
Mr.  Runnington  would  fain  hope  that  it  would  not  come  to 
such  an  issue.  He  consoled  Mr.  Aubrey  with  assurances 
that,  as  for  their  own  demand,  it  might  stand  over  for  several 
years :  and  that  so,  he  was  sure,  would  it  be  with  the  far  les- 
ser demand  of  Mr.  Parkinson ;  and  that  if,  by  a  great  effort, 
sufficient  could  be  raised  to  discharge  promptly  the  bill  of 
Messrs.  Quirk,  Gammon,  and  Snap,  some  much  more  favor- 
able arrangement  respecting  the  amount  and  mode  of  pay- 
ment of  the  the  mesne  profits  might  be  effected — leaving  Mr. 
Aubrey,  in  the  mean  time,  leisure  to  apply  himself  vigorous- 
ly to  his  studies  for  the  bar,  for  which  Mr.  Runnington  as- 
sured him  that  he  considered  him  peculiarly  qualified ;  and 
pledged  himself  to  back  him  with  all  the  influence  he  had  or 
could  command. 

"  Gracious  Heaven,  Mr.  Runnington ! "  said  Aubrey,  with 
a  little  excitement,  "  is  it  not  very  nearly  intolerable  that  I 
should  pass  the  prime  of  my  days  in  thraldom  to  such  people 
as  these,  and  be  encircled  by  the  chains  of  such  a  man  as 
this  Titmouse  is  represented  as  being  ?  I  will  not  call  myself 
his  foe,  nor  his  victim  ;  but  I  am  the  one  through  whose  sud- 
den destitution  he  has  obtained  a  splendid  fortune.  I  did 
not  knowingly  deprive  him  of  it — he  must  be  bereft  of  all  the 
ordinary  feelings  of  humanity,  to  place  me,  whom  he  has  al- 
ready stripped  of  all,  upon  the  rack — the  rack  of  extortion  ! 
Oh !  put  me  in  his  place,  and  him  in  mine — do  you  think  I 
would  not  have  been  satisfied  with  what  I  had  gained? 
"Would  /have  alarmed  and  tortured  him  by  calling  for  an  ac- 
count of  what  he  had  spent  with  a  firm,  a  reasonable  persua- 
sion that  it  was  his  own  ?  Oh,  no !  I  could  not  only  have  for- 
given him  all,  but  endeavored  to  secure  him  from  future  want." 
He  sighed.  "  Oh,  that  I  were  at  this  moment  a  free  man !  pau- 
pe) — sed  in  meo  cere ;  that  I  had  but  five  hundred  pounds  to 
keep  me  and  mine  for  a  year  or  two— with  a  mind  at  ease 
and  fit  for  study !  but  here  we  are,  at  the  Temple.  When 
shall  we  meet  again— or  shall  I  hear  from  you  V  " 

"  Very  shortly,"  replied  Mr.  Runnington,  who  for  the  last 
few  minutes  had  been  listening  to  Mr.  Aubrey  in  respectful 
and  sympathizing  silence  ;  and  shaking  him  warmly  oy  the 
hand,  with  much  cordiality  and  fervency  of  manner,  he 
pledged  himself  to  do  all  in  his  power  to  promote  his  in- 
terests. 


Ill 


7461 


£  SOUTHERN  REGONAi 


A     000  081  791     e 


